I love Mondays.....
NARRATIVE NUMBER ONE
WHEN DEPRESSION SETS IN ....
Good day Bae Stella. Thanks for using your medium to be of help to
others. Now to my story: I don't know where I ever got it wrong in my
life. Am a 33+ lady and am not in any relationship.
Mind you,i am petite and not on the big side at all.Am the take home to mama type. Ever since I was born,I have just been in a relationship once and it didn't
Mind you,i am petite and not on the big side at all.Am the take home to mama type. Ever since I was born,I have just been in a relationship once and it didn't
last a month!
I Am seriously depressed because I have been to MFM for
I Am seriously depressed because I have been to MFM for
deliverance and I still go every wednesday but am yet to find love and
am still seriously searching for job after graduating for 9years . I
do cry myself to sleep and do think deep to the extent of having
headache because people and even my family members have written me off
that something good can come out of my life(speaking positively) while
my younger ones are doing just well. I just need advice pls.How did i get it wrong?Thanks all
You need to sit down and renew your mind set...so you think being in a relationship is how ones success should be rated?you need to change environment from all the negativity in your life.I think being in that atmosphere has messed up your mind and limited your sense of reasoning.Love will come,it will work out for you in good cause but first renew your mindset.
GET BUSY.
GET BUSY.
..........................................................................................................
NARRATIVE NUMBER TWO
RANTINGS OF A DISAPPOINTED WIFEY
Hi Stella, I love you from a distance what I love most about you is your plain nature you say your mind,how I wish I was like you. I thought I married my bestie but I never knew I was so so wrong,and it's more painful because my marriage is barely one year.my hubby is so annoying but I really try to keep up the act of a good and prayerful wife,since we got married he changed I know you would be like I should have seen it while dating but my dear trust me he was fun while we were dating we dated for two years and he was really fun.when he gets backs from work he is stone cold always on his computer claiming he is working this happens everyday even weekend.even if I break my head and bring all the gist in the world he is always not interested.to make things worse I put to bed few months ago since I put to bed he is always not in the mood for sex and i am super horny since I had my baby via CS.
I just feel so alone and neglected, my baby is my only source of joy.i don't know if he is cheating but even if he is at least I wish he was at least a bit sensitive to my needs.back in the days I thought the greatest wrong a man could do was to cheat but us living like housemate is even worse than that.
he is starting to really vex me .did I mention he is an angel at work infact his colleagues call him the life of the room.only God knows why he is terrible at home. Ps: I just want to feel loved is that to much to ask because even after delivery am sexy,his behaviour just makes me feel old am just 29,plus did I mention he farts a lot too which I find so irritating gosh and he doesn't wash his hands after pooping then wipes it with a towel, Allah.
I just feel trapped its so hard because I feel am loosing myself each day.the last time we had a nice time was during the honeymoon after that he stopped doing all the nice things I love.gosh hmmm this men ain't loyal before you marry them na every day is a holiday after marriage them be like bulldog.
I just feel so alone and neglected, my baby is my only source of joy.i don't know if he is cheating but even if he is at least I wish he was at least a bit sensitive to my needs.back in the days I thought the greatest wrong a man could do was to cheat but us living like housemate is even worse than that.
he is starting to really vex me .did I mention he is an angel at work infact his colleagues call him the life of the room.only God knows why he is terrible at home. Ps: I just want to feel loved is that to much to ask because even after delivery am sexy,his behaviour just makes me feel old am just 29,plus did I mention he farts a lot too which I find so irritating gosh and he doesn't wash his hands after pooping then wipes it with a towel, Allah.
I just feel trapped its so hard because I feel am loosing myself each day.the last time we had a nice time was during the honeymoon after that he stopped doing all the nice things I love.gosh hmmm this men ain't loyal before you marry them na every day is a holiday after marriage them be like bulldog.
I honestly do not know what to say to you but to ask you to sit down and check yourself first before you throw stones.Is sex all you think about?do you know whats bothering him?some men cant get it up if they have worries.yo act like sex is food and na so so complain.
I am not saying you are guilty but check your attitude before you complain.
sex,sex,sex,he farts,he didnt clean his yansh is what your mail is all about...self centredness!
cuss me out but i said it how i see it.
Stella bae small small ohhh
ReplyDelete****LONG LIVE SDK & SDKERS*****
P1 happiness is not tied to d blokus of a man, I wish u had a job,any how u can,try n be going out, don't u have friends or frenemies? Lol..
DeleteTake ur bath
Dress funky
Visit me if u don't have friends (don't come) lol.
Play "happy" music n dance
Go n find love if love travelled,or wit for love to find u.
Be positive.
Any of ur younger one that talks down on u, beat am well.
P2...use pant n bra as ur day wear at home if na fuck be d main problem.
Since he doesn't wanna talk to u, buy ear phones n play ur fav music..n dance with ur pant n bra. #My5cents
Poster 1, serious case.
DeleteDevelop a positive mind.
One relationship all your life???
I seriously think you are your own problem. Mountain of Fire cannot help you if i'm right.
Ask yourself questions and answer those questions, then move from there.
Poster2, that your husband needs to be locked up in a room for one week. Why? I don't know. That's just how I feel.
God help us.
I shall have a blissful marriage in Jesus name, Amen.
*stillsad*
Posterc2 you are a randy, horny, self centered bitch
DeleteAllow your husband to make some money sex aint food if toto dey scratch you get a dildo
If his yansh is smelling lick it for him and spare us the details
Real small mouth. P1 nutin is rong wit u, tak stellas advice. P2, ur matter pass me o, bt hav u searched urslf n concluded u did nutin rong cos men can kip tins in dier mind 4 africa bt wat do I no? Lemme read comments.
DeleteDearest BVs. Pls I need your help o.i am expecting a child( just 12 weeks gone) .DH just suggested that I birth the baby in the US. The problem now is I don't have any contact in the US that can help. Most of the people we know are in the UK. Pls I will need info on the category of visa to apply for and the other requirements. Plus I was also advised to apply now before I start to show . Pls any one wit useful information should help me b
DeleteSend me a mail
DeleteThanks for all the advice. I av applied severally for jobs,wen am about to grab the job,its given to another person.Dis has happened lyk 5tyms since 2010. I have fasted,prayed woke up in d middle of d night naked and prayed! Well,willl try to kip a positive mind.Thanks all
DeleteThanks for all the advice. I av applied severally for jobs,wen am about to grab the job,its given to another person.Dis has happened lyk 5tyms since 2010. I have fasted,prayed woke up in d middle of d night naked and prayed! Well,willl try to kip a positive mind.Thanks all
DeletePoster one:just put ursef together...God will surprise u...just be prayerful and have a waiting attitude
DeletePoster two:dont u think dere mite b something ur not doing well....tink of it and improve.....on d 2nd tot all dis tinz u say here can u plz sit ur Hubi down and tell him.......cuz communication is one of d keys to a happy family life....i see u people lack dat...so try to communicate with ur Hubi and discuss tinz with him don't kip a grudge for Hubi it can spoil ur marriage....is better u say tinz dat u don't like dan die in silence
Poster 1: you need serious prayers, like seeing a genuine man of God to deliver you from setback and delays; there are some problems you can't deliver yourself from alone.
DeletePoster2: check yourself, seems you nag a lot and your hubby decieded to ignore you and your rants, thats y he puts all his energy into his work. 2ndly your marriage was based in SEX, you know.....you twerked and grabbed him but sex ain't all there is to marriage
GET YOURSELF BUSY AND STOP NAGGING AND CHANNEL YOUR SEXED STARVED SELF INTO DOING SOMTIN POSITIVE WITH YOUR LIFE.
Tell me why I won't love this blog?
DeleteBlackberry and badassschick you guys are cray!
Dear Anon, apply for ur visa when u start showing, tell them u want to go n give birth, get a letter from a hospital in d US and a good statement of account, dats abt all you need. I am 29wks pregnant n i just got my visa, they dont like lies at US embassy, even if u get d visa with a flat tummy, they r likely to turn u bk at d port of entry if u r heavily pregnant and didnt inform them.
DeletePlease dear I'm interested. How do you get the hospital to give you the letter? Procedures please. Thanks
DeleteAnd they all start re-echoing Stella's opinion??? This ur blog pple sef**
DeletePoster 1: I honestly have no opinion on urs... I pray God directs u*
Poster 2: pls don't mind stella m'dear. Sex is food and u have a right to it! I understand how u feel about hubby being all lovey outside n mean inside. Pls honey, u hv to really try and bond* back with him.
U see a lotta people leave their love life @ d mercy of people. Doing everything to pass d general book... it's wrong and dts where men develop this behaviour of pleasing outsiders from; thereby neglecting u that is by their side.
Talk to God, do ur reasonable best and let him be. Sometimes when u want something too much, that's when men deny u dat tng. Also start ignoring him *wisely* and watch his reaction.
As for his bad habits, pls talk to him about it... and don't go showing him attitudes (it just mayb bruising his ego n making matters worse for u).
Wish u all d best dear*
Blackberry,well said,u dey read my mind!
DeleteThe lady that wants to have her baby in the US, do you have people that will help you? To have your baby here is something else. Lemme know if you are still interested, I will link you up with a friend that came and had her baby. She used an agent. Sexymissy4u@yahoo.com
DeleteP1 sorry. P2 grow up. U are totally and completely childish.
DeleteAnon 20:12 pls can I have your email address? Pls I need more info. I don't know the process at all. Pls help a sister
DeletePoster 2: trust me, your hubby knows exactly what he is doing and it's called EMOTIONAL ABUSE. People who haven't gone thru it can't understand it. He groomed you.....that's why he was perfect before he married you....biding his time. Now you are "trapped" with a child in tow and he feels he can treat you as he pleases. So that the day he finally shows half-face to you, you'll be so grateful.
DeleteHe knows what he is doing and he's a wicked man. That's why he remains the life of the office and every party but he's cold as ice at home. Think am nau
some women are just selfish..which one is sex again...when there lots of important tins to do...if therez no money in the house and he keeps giving u sex all the time,won't you complain
ReplyDeletevisit my blog
www.glowyshoe.blogspot.com
If I say the things in my mind because of this your comment ehn!
DeleteGo and buy a mind of your own.
Imagine what you typed.
I no want talk abeg.
So wat u re saying is sex isn't important in a marriage?
DeleteI went through this period with hubby too. Emotional neglect, that is what I call it. Just focus your mind on something else, get busy, if you don't have job take up a craft or go to church 4 times a week. My hubby is the one always fighting for my attention now. My hubby too never washes his hands after pooing and he poos a lot. Men should learn the habit of washing their hands, its just nasty and he expects a blow job.
DeletePoster 2 does not sound selfish to me,I also think her husband may be going through something and she needs to talk to him .
DeleteGlowy shoe are u married? if u are married, u will have an idea of what she is talking about, but if not, pls keep quiet.
DeleteEven after birth. Like Stella BAE said, something must be bothering him. Take ur time n watch his mood n asked him what is wrong n care for him. Men are like babies.
DeletePoster 1 , hmmm you need a major distraction from everything surrounding you,come let's hangout maybe when I get paid.
DeleteP2,yeah,ur hubby is very disturned about something.
DeleteP1,go n teach in a private school. the pay is small but at least u will be doing something
Glowy shoe. ..lai lai ati lai lai, I won't visit your blog. ..
DeleteHow far
DeleteHow far
DeletePoster 2: And of course, most people in Nigeria (including Stella who is in Germany o) will blame you for someone else's actions. Is it wrong fir a wife to expect companionship and care and sex? Don't listen to all these people blaming you o. That's the game emotional abusers play....they get everyone, including the victim herself, to blame the victim. Because what they do doesn't make sense, everyone takes the easy way out which is laying the blame at your And of course, most people in Nigeria (including Stella who is in Germany o) will blame you for someone else's actions. Is it wrong fir a wife to expect companionship and care and sex? Don't listen to all these people blaming you o. That's the game emotional abusers play....they get everyone, including the victim herself, to blame the victim. Because what they do doesn't make sense, everyone takes the easy way out which is laying the blame at your doorstep.
DeleteAnyway, my advice to you is to ignore him back. Let him see that you don't care about him loving you. 2 can play at his game. Snuff out the negative energy he feeds on. Stop looking sad and morose cos he's not paying you attention. Gist with your friends and family like there's no tomorrow. Let him know the world does not revolve around him. Might just bring him to his senses. If not though, this your new attitude to him will escalate things and at least you will know how far he is willing to play his game and how much you are willing to take before you walk out on him with his deceitful bait and switch tactics.
Obara ndi nso! Stella, u haff finished this poster. Choi! *covers face*
ReplyDeleteNarr 1 pray and have faith, try to sow seeds and speak to it in faith God will change ur story but u need to have a gd mind set, that will help.
DeleteNarr 2 gurl u need to check ur sef, r u doing something he doesn't lik cuz it aint normmal for him2 change ovva night. Work on ur self, try to talk to him n see whts wrong and most esp pray!
This poster 2 is frigging funny mehn.. Hahahahaha it reminded me of alfa sule movie.. Amos 3:3
DeleteThe Single one is depressed.
ReplyDeleteThe Married one is depressed.
I haff tire for all of you!!!!!!
Gosh!!!!!!
Lol
DeleteLMAO
DeleteNa so life be.
Honestly, I'm doubly tired.
DeleteOne wants to get, another out.
Bwahahahaha na to turn gay....wait a minute... Even those ones are committing suicide..
DeletePoster 1 you are screaming marriage like it's life.na only God sabi how long we gat to live.....all these desperation won't get you anywhere if I'm lying as SABOSCO sabo...at least sabo ain't depressed you had better contact her for tutorials on how to deal with being desperate and single
Hahaha! That's human for you!
DeleteHahaha! That's human for you.
DeletePoster1 get busy with God nd he would locate you within a jiffin... Poster2, I think you complain a lot...try nd stop complaining nd find d good in ur hubby
DeleteHahahaHahah @ Olivia married wahala, single wahala, baba God na ur leg we dey o cos ur hand don full
Deleterotfl. depressed is an understament.
Deletei kmow exactly what dey need. poster 1 n 2 check out dis blog
Life Encounters
Poster 1: 9 years is a pretty long time to be idle doing nothing and to be sincere with u no company wants to hire someone without work for such a long period like urs. Since the jobs u've been applying for hasnt worked out, get yourself busy by learning a skill or something and be your own boss that way u free yourself from all the worry because my dear the boy friend/husband you are searching for won't come and find you at home plus no guy is interested in a jobless lady. Above all things keep praying. Your breakthrough is closer than you think. All the best dear.
DeleteHahahahahahahahahahahaha
ReplyDeleteThe 2nd narrator is a comedian
OMG!!!!!
He farts a lot - LMAO
I'm sorry for laughing
Too many problems meehhnnn.
ReplyDeleteAeegurl...
A lot....(sighs)
DeleteStella STFU and stop taking sides,nonsense
ReplyDeletee bu anonymous, ana chuo gi achuo..*in phyno's voice*...it is well
DeleteNo mind her! Na her way be dat
DeleteY go under anonynous to vet ur anger...haha...am sure u are depressed..take a chill pill bae
DeleteHummmmm na wa o.poster 1 change environment n if u can't get a job learn a skill pls
ReplyDeletePoster2 if love is blind marriage will open ur eyes.
NN1: i think you should take to Stella's advice, I have a cousin who is in her mid 30s and still single, all she does is sit at home watching church crusade and different pastor ministrations, *there is nothing wrong in that though* but no man will find you if all you do is lock yourself inside the walls of your house.
ReplyDeleteNN2: Stella take it easy on her, biko. She is funny sha, lol @he fart alot. you both need to sit and talk, there must be an issue(s) communication is the key.
Please click on my name for Fashion/Fitness/Beauty tips
Lol this stella mouth henn.. Poster1, u need to be strong, there are situations u find yourself n d only option is to b strong,even if u cry a river,nothing will change,dust urself up,make friends,go to church,mix up,smile,submit ur CV. You can even submit ur CV here n someone might b touched to give u a job, u need to relocate or go for holidays,maybe visit a friend n stay there for a while to refresh urself, there are phases in life, u wnt be like this forever mydear, pray nd get involved with church activities, u can learn a craft or handwork,learn how to bake, just dnt hide in a room nd feel miserable, come out n engage yourself, you are d only one that can make yourself happy first before a man can notice u. U need to socialise n pray n b positive n dnt look down on yourself. Poster2, na ur cross u dey carry soooo o, y not find a way to tell him how u feel before u posted this story? U can talk to him nd table ur complains n let him know how his behaviours irritate u, if u really love him u shd make a move to bring peace nd love in ur house, communication is the key
ReplyDeleteHummmmm na wa o.poster 1 change environment n if u can't get a job learn a skill pls
ReplyDeletePoster2 if love is blind marriage will open ur eyes.
Poster 1.
ReplyDeleteHold on dear; God is still in the business of performing miracles.
Poster2.
You and your man should talk deeply. But what do I know, maybe you have already talked. Try again in a subtle manner.
@ poster 1, giving you e-hugs. I really feel for you. Your man will locate you. Take ur mind off it, get busy n make new frnds. Wouldn't mind being ur friend
DeleteHummmmm na wa o.poster 1 change environment n if u can't get a job learn a skill pls
ReplyDeletePoster2 if love is blind marriage will open ur eyes.
I finally got my blog Id today.
ReplyDeletePls hw did u go abt it,av been trying to get mine
Delete@P1 and P2, STELLA HAS ANSWERED YOU RIGHTLY
ReplyDeleteLet me sit down n read comments like stella.
ReplyDeleteHummmmm na wa o.poster 1 change environment n if u can't get a job learn a skill pls
ReplyDeletePoster2 if love is blind marriage will open ur eyes.
Lol @ fart fart fart
ReplyDelete@poster1 I think you need to be more positive. Maybe you have the mindset that you are not a lucky person or things wouldn't work out well for you, but my dear, good things come to those who believe.
Just change the way you feel about yourself, have fun, life is not all about being in a relationship, as for a job, God will grant you one at the appointed time!
@poster2 your complaint got me laughing especially at the farting part,lol. Everybody dey fart my dear! As for the change of character, I think you should communicate with him and say what you feel is bothering you. Goodluck with that!
maybe she they hide fart..lol
DeleteComments plzzzz...
ReplyDeletePoster 1, get busy, surround yourself with people with positive mindsets,don't give just yet, it will work together for your good.
ReplyDeletePoster 2,am not married yet.all d best.
poster 1:heeyaah.Sorry dear.
ReplyDeletePoster 2:u dey madt! Rape ur husband naah! shuu!
Hahahahahah!i can't fit laugh.
ReplyDeletePoster1 you know what change environment,surround yourself wwith positive people,learn new skills,engage in church activities before you know it,things will turn around for good for you.
Poster 2...eeermn sit down and talk to him about it.there might be something going on in his mind.there might be something you have done that is pissing him off.try and find out about it.as per the fart,na all men dey mess oo,dat one is not an issue abeg.jst talk to him about how you feel.
Bolateethole.blogspot.com
Poster 1:I think you should start with getting a job , that way you get to meet more people and interact
ReplyDeleteKeep you eyes open, when Stella does the single n mingle's post, you should participate and also drop your cv where necessary
Poster2; Your marriage is still very young, I didn't see anywhere where u stated that you have talked to him about how you feel...
Stella, sex is not food, but she has a right to be satisfied sexually!
My only comment for here be say I love stella, if I be man I swear I for don collect you from ur hubby, lol, u de talk am as e de hot, love u all.
ReplyDelete2nd narrative don kill me with laugh...
ReplyDeleteLMAO at he farts a lot.....
Hahahahahahahahahaha.....
My dear,you are still new in marriage that's why you are complaining bitterly about all these....
The earlier you start ignoring this tiny things,the better for you....
Remember it's for better and for worse...
Ok lemme ask you,are you always in the mood to talk with people???..
As for the sex part,he has seen you finish making him to stop having that sexual urge with you....
Stop changing your cloths in his presence....
Stop having bath with him....
Aswear,most men don't find their women's body appealing after giving birth...
It's a secret they will never tell you cos they wouldn't want you to start feeling bad....
Different strokes for different folks! Life is all about up and down. You can't have it all to yourself.
ReplyDeleteMR EDDY said this harmattan is sponsored by MTN. It is everywhere u go.
ReplyDeleteI second ur thoughts Stella.
^
^
^™THAT EDO BOY.COM~wishes u happy new year.
POSTER 1, my dear you really need to change environment, go stay with a relative or even friends outside ur area, then keep praying and love yourself more. I know you need a job most now but you need to keep applying, change ur mentality about life, face God and most esp love yourself. God will bless you before the year Ends amen.
ReplyDeletePOSTER 2, I was thinking of you, did you ask yourself what changed, did you do something that made him change immediately after marriage, check yourself first, then sit him down. Talk to him, tell him how you feel and hear his reply before concluding. He must have noticed something wch he hasn't been able to tell you. So sit him doWn and talk to him am sure there is something wrong. And please wats wrong in d fart, you should be used to it or tell him how u don't like it.
POSTER 1, my dear you really need to change environment, go stay with a relative or even friends outside ur area, then keep praying and love yourself more. I know you need a job most now but you need to keep applying, change ur mentality about life, face God and most esp love yourself. God will bless you before the year Ends amen.
ReplyDeletePOSTER 2, I was thinking of you, did you ask yourself what changed, did you do something that made him change immediately after marriage, check yourself first, then sit him down. Talk to him, tell him how you feel and hear his reply before concluding. He must have noticed something wch he hasn't been able to tell you. So sit him doWn and talk to him am sure there is something wrong. And please wats wrong in d fart, you should be used to it or tell him how u don't like it.
Poster 1,
ReplyDeleteCan you change your location?..
I know someone that lived all her 37years in the east and got married immediately she relocated to Lagos....
THELMA ENEMUWE said...
ReplyDeletePoster1,it is well with you,do urself a favour and leave that toxic environment,oluwa is boo provider who is still in the business of surprising pple wit the bestest boo they can eva tink of...if ure doubting me,ask Jayem and wideeyes...
Poster2----enough of ur numerous assumptions biko,guess u felt marriage was a bed of roses before entering into it,just a little challenge ure facing and marriage don dey tire you....seat Ʊ® hubby down and get 2 d root of the matter.....ΐ rest my case here before my proprietor catch me say ΐ dey blog mbok!!!!
*faithful BV enemuwe thelma*
Poster 2
ReplyDeleteI hope women are not beginning to mistake this forum for a "diss your hubby game"
I think you might be having post natal depression... lol. It makes you see things that are not there.
Do you want people here to tell you he is cheating,and am truly surprised that you would not mind that he is cheating!
You are 29years old... you should be able to handle some of those things you listed... who doesn't fart madam??
About the not caring part... every woman has a way of making her man listen.. I have my own tactics or modus operandi! Use yours and get his attention back...
Are you on maternity leave? Or you stay home? That also brings some form of boredom which you might be taking out on him..get busy sweerie...
Seduce him na...lol. Does your man like "early morning delight"Give him some before work,say around 4am... then talkkkkkkkkk! bare your heart to him just the way you have written here..I strongly believe most of you all open up here more than at home.
Ist poster
Don't despair.. Go out more!
Dress decently but nicely..Go for bright colours...... Pay attention to how you look.
Try to attend seminars for singles..
Chat up some university guys and girls you have their contacts and re-bond. A hook up might come out of it,you never know.
If small money dey hand, braid your hair nicely..long,sweet,black braids are sexy.
Lastly.. Get a nice new google id and wait for the next sdk hook up!! Try and introduce yourself without sounding brass and desperate. I will be rooting for you!! All the best dear!
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDelete@poster1:Buy ODM n war against haman,and join in their fasting programme.
ReplyDeleteYou will see wonders that's if u have faith
Thank me later
@poster2 : stella,even if d man is going tru hell,he should never neglect his wife 4 God's sake but instead he should confide in her....
She is horny and u are saying if sex is all she thinks abt.
I don't understand ur advice sometimes tho
If is the man dat is horny, her wife will be reminded how oda women are ready to satisfy her hubby.
Madam, pls talk 2 ur hubby abt all dis tins u just mentioned.
Let him know dat he is boring u 2 death and starving u of sex on top.
Some men tho
Good luck
At poster 2, now u knw he farts alot and doesn't was his hands after pooing? U must be a nagging wife...better buckle up and take care of ur home and little baby rather than picking on little tins.
ReplyDeletePoster 1:
ReplyDeleteReinvent yourself.
Forget all these "pretty and take home to Mama-type" hype.
Obviously your MOD over these years is not working. Change your outlook and attitude to life.
Make yourself look available and accessible to men. Go to gatherings where you are likely to meet responsible men.
Stop feeling sorry for yourself.
Take your destiny in your own hands.
How can you still be searching for work a decade after graduating? If you were selling satchet water then, it would have grown into a pure water factory by now.
Stop with the all-round defeatist attitude.
Poster 2:
Everyone that writes in claim to be beautiful, sexy, well behaved etc.
There's no smoke without fire!
A man who was very good to you before marriage sudden turned into a monster after marriage?
And he is still a saint at work.
Madam, when you talked to him about these things, what did he say to you?
I'm not an advocate of keeping things strictly between a couple. Your matter has reached a point where you involve the elders: parents, aunts or older friends.
More importantly, search yourself.
At Narrative number 2. I genuinely understand what you are going through. In very popular words, this is all part of the see finish syndrome. You have to make allowances for activities you can get involved in without him. Hang out with the girls, go on play dates with other mothers who are in your age bracket. Get a job or find something to keep you busy and generally just live your life. Eventually you'll ignore him enough to get him inquisitive and interested in what you have to say. Whatever you do, don't let yourself go. Good luck
ReplyDeletehmmm. both singles and married are complaining. orieqwu
ReplyDeleteNa wah oo.
ReplyDelete2nd Narrator na real comedian but has Stella has rightly said,Check yourself ma'am
i hav a friend dat farts too but its just fun. he said, if he is comfortable with sm1, he will be free with u to d extent of fartin. at 1st i was irritated but with time i saw it as nothing. u fart, i fart back. no nid to even say sorry. its fun, lolz. please talk to him, let it all out. please married pple give we single ones hope abeg, dnt let us be scared of marriage. God help us all.
ReplyDeletekindly check out my blog http://pamscrib.blogspot.com/
Poster 1 I think you should change environment,get a place of your own no matter how smal and please learn a handiwork.sewing,baking,soap making etc if you put your mind to it you won't be looking for a job rather you will be employing people.
ReplyDeletePoster 2 it is well just seat him down and talk to him,let him know he is hurting your feelings.the issue of farting and not washing his hands after pooh is really not what you should be complaining about.talk to him about it.but bae if your hubby can't fart in your presence na who him go the fart for now?lol! I fart in presence of hubby a lot and he does same to me and we laugh about it.life is not so serious jor! Marriage should be fun.wish u all the best.
poster 2: hmmmm... do u have anything u Re keeping from him... like a dirty secret u think he can't find out... Cos If u claim u Re a saint and he is well... an asshole from all I can deduct from what u wrote...
ReplyDeletemen don't just change... people just don't change... something must trigger it.. .for every action there must be a reaction.... search ur sef...
and lastly talk to him... try to make him open up to u... don't nag... just pour ur heart out... watch... and listen...
Stella dear u gav it to her jus d way I shuld hav given her.....maybe d house is always dirty or unkept nd puts d man off once he opens d door......marriage is nt all abt sex....create a gud relationship nd be frnds
ReplyDeletePoster1: it's well, like Stella rightly said, renew your mind set, and don't allow your size dictate your future. I know a lot of small People has big mind!
ReplyDeletePoster2: I can relate to your story. Stella please dnt sound that way, the problem has just started now,it sound like a Joke, but if it is not well taken care of, it will lead to something else. This was how my hubby started. I spoke to him several times,he never listen, instead he said I should seek for sex,love and companion else where. If I'm not satisfied with out he dished out. Count down to 8yrs I feel nothing for him anymore, he's struggling to make it right. My dear poster, please sit him down and speak to him,if he doesn't listen,get busy and make yourself look Sexy, get him Jealous if possible. He's gonna come around someday. I hope by the time he does, you've not stated cheating. Goodluck dear!
Hmmmm
DeleteHahahahah.. Stella egbugom. He farts, he no clean nyash. #dies😂😂
ReplyDeleteNot in the mood today....will just wait and read comment
ReplyDeletePoster two,calm down,is obvious you are depressed and passing thru post natal depression.every about the man irritates you. Sex isn't all in marriage. Since he wasn't like that before why not check to see if everything is ok with him generally.
ReplyDeleteStella bae of.... that was harsh. poster 2 got to say it as its. but you knew that dirty part of him while dating? using it against him now is totally wrong. You hubby might be going through issues though. Continue to love you baby and show your dh care.
ReplyDeletePoster 1 relax and continue to have faith he said in His time he would do a new thing. But its not everyone is meant to be an employee. Get busy with what you can do seek his face and channel those prayers to it believe me all will definitely be well.
Lol! Some bv's be echoing stella's advice..
ReplyDeletePoster 1,keep on praying,never give up,in due time your heart desires will be granted..
Poster 2,have a frank talk with hubby,tell him the things he does that puts u off,open up totally don't hold back..
#1 i think it starts with you, change your mindset and don't stop praying.God help yu
ReplyDelete#2 I believe if a particular behaviour springs out of a person all of a sudden, something must have triggered it, maybe you just have to find out what.
Lol, Stella u no pity this last poster at all.
ReplyDeleteposter 1-change location and meet new people ,pack your bags and travel to new location ,if you can afford it travel abroad ,meet new people ,new friends get a job ,i tell you your life wont be the same again.
ReplyDeleteposter 2.hMMMM.,nigeriian men arent loyal at all ,have you checked yourself ,if the marriage was based on sentiments.
try to find out what is bothering him,am sure there is a reason why he behaves that way.as for not washing his hands or farting too much,playfully tell him about it..if he still doesnt get it,sit him down and tell him how you feel....but wait oooo,a man you love is free to fart around you na abi?you can do the same as well and laugh about it provided you both do it when you are alone. poster 1,pls stop crying and feeling depressed.get your groove on.be busy and take it to the lord in prayer .love will come when you least expect.remember that a watched kettle never boils.take your eyes off the kettle and you will be amazed to see it boiling.all the best.
ReplyDelete2nd poster pls sex isn't food try and talk to him, ask him what the problem is. He might me going through a psychology problem. He needs your encouragement not nagging
ReplyDeleteStella BEA no IHN today; waiting patiently wallahi.
ReplyDeleteKai! Stella you use style funny abeg.
ReplyDelete1. Since you've prayed. Have a positive attitude. Change environment if possible. Change your looks (hairdo and dress well). Go out often e.g church gatherings, cinema et al. Just get busy, wear a cheerful appearance always and love will find you when you least expected. Believe God has answered your prayers. Lest I forget, get a job even if the pay is meager. It will keep you busy and also help you go out everyday.
2. Try and get involve with what he does. Keep asking him questions related to his work, ask about his family cos you never can tell if there is a problem and he isn't sharing it with you. Try doing those things that use to spark up the fire and excitement when you were dating. Pray and be hopeful. Its well
Poster 1: be positve
ReplyDeletePoster 2; talk to ur hubby calmyly pls
Av u tot abt having decandent desserts at ur party? Try May's Desserts - 3327A3A4
Bia don't blame this woman she just needs her husband to treat her like a wife
ReplyDeleteN1: learn to make urself happy, because when depression sinks in, u'll find it hard to love anyone and u'll remain frustrated 4eva.....
ReplyDeleteN2: I knw ow u feel, m nt married though n dnt mind stella, It also irritates me wen pple fart everytime and nt clan deir hands afta pooping...but nontheless, as stella sed, try n find out wats eatin him up! Gdlk!
Bestie before marriage. Worstie (forgive my grammar) afta marriage. Wots d causer? Am just scared stiff, d tales of marriages I hear on ds bleg ehnn is enof t make one hv a rethink n go t d convent. Lemme sit bak n read comment. #single
ReplyDeleteNarrator 1: Remain positive and try to change your environment, meet and mix with new people. God will grant you all your heart desires.
ReplyDeleteNarrator 2: Iyawo oniso, na so so complaints.Try to sit your husband down and have a conversation with him. Learn those things that are bothering him and how you can contribute your own part to ease him up. Also, you should offer to clean up for him once in a while when he is done using the toilet. That way, you will teach him the proper way to clean up. And most importantly, get busy!!!
@1, boy friend should not be ur priority for now, get busy cos no man wants a broke and jobless chic for a wife.
ReplyDelete@2, u complain too much, do wat other married single women are doing, get a sugar boy to service ur Congo cos e be like say ashawo dey ur body. U just had a baby thru CS and u are feeling horny already, na wao.
N2:don't know what to say. He farts a lot, not attentive etc. Sigh. Let him know how you feel. Maybe he's fighting his own demons too.
ReplyDelete*Ayah Shehu *
Poster2 you got what you want from Stella's opinion,then after few months or weeks of C/S delivery you are becoming horny again.Say your body don done?[as in she obo re ti jinani?] take it easy and get to know where you got it wrong first b4 you accused him of cheating!
ReplyDeleteAs some bvs would say, Oriegwu...
ReplyDeleteP1: The mind is a powerful and enchanting thing... you need to work on your mindset. it all begins with you and you have to start with positive thinking...
Once a negative thot has been introduced into the mind, it begins to grow.. replace negative thoughts, focus on being a better person, be cheerful, smile, learn to dance, do things that make you happy, disassociate yourself from things, places and people who make you sad, relocate if possible, be grateful for life and focus on the things that you have rather than those you don't, believe in yourself.... its not as easy as it sounds, its not magic but a process... one step at a time...
P2: Stella bae is right, you are all about yourself and you really should check that... he might have noticed too that you have become self-centered. this is not saying that you should not look out for your own happiness but in making others happy we become happy too. so rather than whine and sulk, look for ways to may your husband happy and your home lively and soon the sun will start to shine...
Wen u think u av a big problem, and reads someone else story, then u realise ur own probs is small compared to anoda person own. Wat faces one might be backing anoda person. All I can say to poster 1 nvr give up, nvr accept defeat urself,nvr luk down on urself, be thanking God dat u are alive,nvr loose faith and NEVER LOOSE HOPE. Some people are too shy. Identify wat u think is d problem and work on dat.
ReplyDeletePoster 1.. stay strong and hang in there. keep yourself busy, it will increase your self esteem. Love will find you but let it find you in a confident and independent status in Jesus Name, Amen.
ReplyDeletePoster 2; Stella dearie..... abeg wey that your bed, I need to lie down well well and read comments... hmm i cant shout.
a.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said...
ReplyDelete.
Poster one.. The way i see it, yu want a rich man to show off to ur family bcos no matter hw a lady looks like there is a guy falling for her so na long throat dey worry yu nothing else....
.
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Poster two. I for finish yu but stella don help me for that area..... Have yu ever ask him hw is work and other related stuff... My frnd chop shit.... Selfish buga....
*GLO BRING 3G TO KONTAGORA*
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***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***
a.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said...
ReplyDelete.
Poster one.. The way i see it, yu want a rich man to show off to ur family bcos no matter hw a lady looks like there is a guy falling for her so na long throat dey worry yu nothing else....
.
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Poster two. I for finish yu but stella don help me for that area..... Have yu ever ask him hw is work and other related stuff... My frnd chop shit.... Selfish buga....
*GLO BRING 3G TO KONTAGORA*
.
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***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***
Poster one: There must be something not quite right in/about your life.
ReplyDeleteHopefully, you figure it out soon.
Poster two:
Hmmm,pele o
But you need to be sure everything is alright with him.
I know someone who is all nice,and everything but he'll rather be withdrawn than tell you what's wrong no matter how close , except you pry.
And I think that's men for you.So instead of coming here to complain, try to find out what's wrong, or are we supposed to ask for his number to do it for you.
Meanwhile, I don't agree with Stellz on the not washing hands after pooing ish. That's irritating abeg.
U mean u just wasted 9yrs Bcox u were not able to get a job, wat if u r destined to create n employ people? Most time we tend to limit our selves n den we cry wolf, learn skills, start up something. Live ur life like it's golden, relocate, make new frnds, start all ova again! It's not about relationships, the after all dese, pray! Prayer solves every problem but u need to help urself 1st by presenting urself as an asset not a liability! After all these my dear, Party! Socialize! Go out! Meet people! Attend youth n happening churches! Renew ur mind. Trust me it works like magic cux I'm a living witness. Poster2, hehehehehheh u so got me cracked up, i'm not married, but I heard communication is d key, something must hv cuxed d sudden change, examine urself too. Gud luck
ReplyDeletePoster one.. Stop looking for a job and learn a skill.. We can't all have white collar jobs.. Go out.. Beach.. Weddings even if the bride is jst the friend of a friend's cousin's sister in law's niece.. I hear people meet great guys in gyms.. Join one even if you are slim itsfor keeping fit.. Above all don't be desperate.. Guys can smell a desperate girl and take advantage of her.. Keep praying and never relent.. All the best dear
ReplyDeletePoster 2: buy a dildo
ReplyDeletePoster 1: sorry oh. Naija n marriage pressure sha. Change your mindset. Find happiness within u. Pele
poster 1 finding love isnt a guarantee for happiness,keep loving urself and do all that is right by u .
ReplyDeleteposter 2,if my hubby farts bfor me im glad he can be free with me do not create a problem where there is none,u married my dad be that ,but guess what the only way my mum learnt to live with that for 25 years is to learn that she cannot change him.About the being sensitive to ur needs,dont give us these stories to aunty nana if u have not spoken to him,now if u have n its not changing accept him for who he is maybe thats who he rly is but when dating he had to make u find reasons to want to be with him,he might not be cheating but if he is,Lemmi tell u when a man cheats no jupiter will bring him bk to who he used to be n at that point u @ home r the worst thing that has happened to him till his mumu clears from his eyes.
Make ur self happy and enjoy ur u time while u hope he notices u rnt hovering around him.If he will change he will.God bless.
Poster 1: There is absolutely nothing wrong with you my dear. Take some time and review yourself,dress well,always wear a smile, be positive about everyone and everything, read books, make new interesting friends, research on topics that interest you, generally rebuild your self and improve your outlook to life and then you would become happier and attract the right people.
ReplyDeletePoster 2: you have got some humour lol!Maybe you should try this at home. Maybe you need to check yourself and what you are not doing right , maybe you changed, maybe your expectations are alot. You know what just relax and cut him some slacks,be happy and maybe he would get attracted to your happiness.
Poster 1
ReplyDeleteMarriage is not everything. Find pleasure in what life gives you. I know some people that have lost their lives as a result of being married. So dont increase your expectations that it is heaven
Poster 2
I understand your position, especially the sex part. Unfortunately, these are what most people dont know are ISSUES. Your husband has lost interest in you. If you are lucky, he may not be cheating. For some men, they get gingered when they see something new. If he still loves you, then you can count yourslef lucky too. All you need to do is talk to him. Passion may die quick, but love does not so easily
NB: This is the part where women cheat. If you try it........sorry, if them catch you,.... so dont oh
Stella,to b honest wt u,u are harsh n don't hide it unda being blunt bcos there are so many ways to talk n talk sence! M sure poster 2will regret eva sending ha mail... Hello stella,if u don't hav anythn to say shut up n let ha read our own comment,what sort of condemnation is dat u just gave ha! Oh pls, listen to urself b4 dishing rubbish out. That lady wasn't emotionally stable b4 she sent ha mail,u made it even worse! stop calling pple names,yes, u called ha "centerdness" who are u to do dat? Stella dat has a blog? Who nos everythn? U shuld b able to bring d right energy dat makes pple feel beta than thy were when they 1st come to u! That ur yeye ans na worst rubbish of 2015. Abeg pack well ooo!Don't judge n don't condemn! Kip d golden rule abeg... And Yes,sex is very important in marriage,if ur own libido is dead,sorry abt dat but let pple who's libido is alive express their feeling? Pissed*
ReplyDeleteI really love u.The most sensible comment ever
Deletetrue that!
DeleteAm sure alot of people appreciate your advice Stella..but if you can't also give constructibee criticism to the table, its better you don't say anything at all!
Lol. See vexation.
DeleteNo vex! Gerrout joor!
DeleteIrresistible....you are so right....I love you for this
DeletePoster one, you are not alone. There are thousand and one 3something single ladies out there. Please having a man in your life should not be your first priority now. Place a value on yourself first then when you get a man he will value you. At 33 you don't have a job? I think that's where you need to start. A job will give you the opportunity to go out every day and meet new people. It will also give people the opportunity to see how amazing you are. In fact you need to read poster 2, to know how important it is to have a career before marriage. When you are improved and developed as a person, you will learn to tolerate others. Marriage is not a child's play as far as am concerned so prepare yourself psychologically so you don't end up ranting. Please see below my recent prayer and maybe you should make it your prayer too;
ReplyDeleteDear Lord, I have
No boo
No good job
No money....
I know I should be asking for a boo first because of my age, but what I need most now is a good job for;
Self worth
Self development
Self improvement
Self income
And possibly
Self boo. Lol
Despite all these, I thank You for my life and all you did for me in 2014. Please answer my prayers this 2015. I want to testify to Your goodness
AMEN
Poster 2, marriage needs a lot of tolerance. Please learn to tolerate simple things of life that are inevitable. How can you be complaining that your hubby farts a lot. That should be something you joke about with the one you love and maybe even have a fart competition. Lol. But seriously, you have to loosen up. Maybe, as you are complaining about your hubby, he is also complaining about you. Please sit him down and have a chat with him. Don't make it look like he is facing a panel please. Just start off with a joke that can pique his interest( maybe when he farts, you can say a joke about it) and then gradually move to asking him why he is no longer fun as he used to be. Please, don't bring up the no sex issue. He will come around to doing that when all tensions have been removed. Trust me. What he once was, he can still be. About not washing his hands after using the loo, you can still make him do it without actually letting him know. Something like, bae I saw a documentary or movie and it was gross. This man had the habit of not washing his hands after visiting the loo and .............please make up a story. You know your hubby very well so you should know what can move him. Please make your home work. You can't continue to rant. FIX IT.
Poster 2, wow!! why cant your hubby fart in front of u? dont your fart? I and my fiance fart infront of each other and make jokes of which smells worse we even yab each other about how smelly the persons fart is, and we can use it to prolly determine if the person needs to poo or take fruits.
ReplyDeleteBut my point is, maybe all this his shortcomings, i.e poo , not washing his hands and all, maybe you rubbed it in his face and hurt his ego. Just saying, I dont know. But just sit and trace whr it all went wrong. All the best love.
Poster 1. Pls dont give up. You can start a business. what do you love doing? You can use it to take your mind of things, be occupied, meet people and be happy.
This is my second time commenting after almost 2 years, I commented yesterday, on that poster that her . hubby beat up! I was scared for her. Then this fart thing got me kind of worried, like why cant you fart in front of hubby who is supposed to be ur paddy! the person who sees you naked, when ur sick, givin birth, sees your unmade up face when you wake in the morning. Hian!! Kinda love you guys and all your drama!
Gf you jus told my story except d part of not washing his hands after pooping. I don't even know how else to get his attention
ReplyDeletePoster 2, if you say he has changed, maybe there is an attitude you put up that is putting him off, going by your story he was great when u guys were dating so stb has changed. Is he willing to talk about it? Have u tried to check yourself and see if sth is putting him off? Is he complaining about sth and you are not listening? It could be a very little thing putting him off. You have to work to have a good marriage, that doesn't happen over night.
ReplyDeletePoster1 there's more to life than a relationship, everyone must not get married, better yourself learn a trade make your market sellable nobody wants a liability
lol... funny naratives... wo temi tomi leru jare..
ReplyDeleteFind a way and enjoy your marriage and stop complaining.
ReplyDeletePoster 2, wow!! why cant your hubby fart in front of u? dont your fart? I and my fiance fart infront of each other and make jokes of which smells worse we even yab each other about how smelly the persons fart is, and we can use it to prolly determine if the person needs to poo or take fruits.
ReplyDeleteBut my point is, maybe all this his shortcomings, i.e poo , not washing his hands and all, maybe you rubbed it in his face and hurt his ego. Just saying, I dont know. But just sit and trace whr it all went wrong. All the best love.
Poster 1. Pls dont give up. You can start a business. what do you love doing? You can use it to take your mind of things, be occupied, meet people and be happy.
This is my second time commenting after almost 2 years, I commented yesterday, on that poster that her . hubby beat up! I was scared for her. Then this fart thing got me kind of worried, like why cant you fart in front of hubby who is supposed to be ur paddy! the person who sees you naked, when ur sick, givin birth, sees your unmade up face when you wake in the morning. Hian!! Kinda love you guys and all your drama!
Na wa ooo.lol!
DeleteThe single and the married.lol.una pele o
ReplyDeletePoster1- Your mindset is twisted already.change your mindset. You are not cursed and can never be. Our lives are a reflection of what we feel on the inside. So if things arent going well for you then something is wrong in the inside. Renew your mindset, get away from all the negativity and you ll see a change. Cheers!
Poster 2. Talk to your husband biko.
People should talk to their partners first before bringing their chronicle here hian!
N1, This your own is serious. N2, i believe you are the problem, can you imagine complaining about your husband's fart? SMH..Some women ehn! I feel you both got married for the wrong reasons. SMH. Saying he farts too much!! TF! Mtcheeew.
ReplyDeleteShebi you like the way she says it as it is abi? And you wish you were like her? Ok na..swallow that.@stella I know you are known for your 'saying it as it is' but that wasn't nice. Say it as it is in a nice manner.what do I know?
ReplyDeletena wah wetin we no hear
ReplyDeleteu jus have to be patient
ReplyDeletePoster 2: your husband is a downlow brother and you're are just his beard.
ReplyDeleteHello Stella, am a fan of your blog, have been reading your blog since you started blogging, i equally have a blog too, but that is story for another day. I see so many people writing to tell you about one issue or the other, I just want to tell them to start or rather still build a relationship with God. Yeah they all spend hours and days viewing your blog, how about their relationship with Jesus Christ? How long have they sat at Christ table to talk with him. Please you all should have a particular time each day, where you go to sit and talk with God. develop a personal relationship with God and every other thing will fall into place. The bible says seek you first the kingdom of God and every other thing will be added unto you. Thank you Stella for using your platform to touch lives. May God reward you abundantly.
ReplyDeleteNo vex, cus u are with them in their respective homes and office; to know whether they pray to God or not.Some people do have a lot of time to help people carry matter for head.Did u even pause to think if everyone on here is an Atheist? Nne just negodu!
DeleteIHN rocks!,Will be back with my comments
ReplyDelete@olivisilk I am laughing out loud because of your comment. Cases closed.
ReplyDeleteChai STELLA, ur so funny walai.
ReplyDeleteP1- pls stayin indoors won't bring u love, faith without works is dead. Try goin out & gettin a new skill or hobby, even if na teachin in primary skol abeg...
P2. Mayb ur husbnd is disturbed abt sumtin, talk 2 him abt it. I hope u don't nag him o?? If u want sex, y won't u initiate it...e.g baby, I've bin so horny, haba come & gimme some na! Ur manner of approach can take u a long way. Ur hubby has a baby in him, try soothing & bringin it out with love tactics & all ur 'woman' skills. I wish u all d best
Poster 1: I'm so sorry, about all you're going through. But I have to ask, do you have a personal relationship with God? Apart from attending deliverance services, have you engaged yourself in a personal one-on- one supplication with God, asking him all those questions and telling him to change your story.
ReplyDeleteMy dear its not about attending programmes, but having an encounter personally with God.
After which have faith, that its already done.
Then how's your appearance like, dress in a youthful but matured way. Presentation matters.
Have a positive mindset, do things that make you happy.
After engaging in all of the above, just be patient, God is working sth out for your good, and it will be for a testimony.
Poster 2: Communication is the key to your problem. Have a heart to heart talk with your hubby, in with a gentle tone, while at it, show him pics of how your lives used to be fun and enjoyable. I'm sure he'll come around.
Here's to any Bv who can help me with a laptop, for my studies. I sincerely wish I could get it myself, regrettably, I cannot afford to buy one, I'm just believing God right now. Thank you and God bless.
God bless you SDK. Hugs And kisses.
Poster2 its not always all abt you pls try and find out what is bothering your hubby first
ReplyDeletePoster 1 - You need to check yourself. I DO NOT, I repeat DO NOT believe after 9 years of grad, you CAN'T find ANYTHING to do! Business nko? Have u asked your siblings for capital and found a way to roll it over? Baking, fashion designing, interior décor, makeup, hairstyling? Madam, check yourself. It's easy to look out and say things aren't going well, but for no man to even come around you and your only relationship lasted only 1 month, its not normal. And it may not even be a spiritual problem, if MFM has done their part. Be honest with yourself. What are u not doing right?
ReplyDeletePoster 2- Oh well.... I didn't see where u said you tried talking to him and he ignored u or didn't explain his actions.
I actually liked the part where she said she discovered that cheating isn't the worst thing that happens in a marriage. Indeed, there are men who are VERY faithful and VERY disgusting! They will frustrate u and you will rather someone else has a share of that frustration. lolol
Stelladoll u de worry sha,sex na food oooo....it connects d hrt n is needed evrydai.*justsaying
ReplyDelete~@iamjbankz SA to President Jonathan 2015~
@ poster 2: on your behalf am ashamed of your words in your write up.believe me; if you are not careful; you will pull your home down with your hands.when I started reading your post; I said this one really has no problem and to confirm it; you are the nagging time that doesn't know when to shot up and when to talk.someone who doesn't know where to talk too.pls let me ask you; is farting a sin.don't you know that when one doesn't fart that it is a problem.how can you be talking about non relevant issues about your husband like this.is still how you will stay in marriage.your type will even goosip with neighbours about your husband.because if you can be so shallow minded to speak about him farting; what else will you do.now listen; marriage is a serious business and not were we go for jamborees.this is business and a lot of issues have to be taken care of.bills have to be paid.the little one has to be taken care of. you all have to eat and other things which are in your husband'mind now.I am sure you are not working and you don't know the things at stake now. pls what you should be doing now is to be giving him TLC; by telling him that all will be well and helping find solutions to the family's problems; thereby making him to feel relaxed and know that all is well.you should help relax his mind not all these rubbish that you are saying.this will now take his mind off work and give you the love that you crave for. pls if you know that you are not mentally and emotionally ready for marriage; pls do not marry.marriage is not were we go and listen to tales by moon light or a jamboree affair
ReplyDeletePoster 1 - change location and start to socialise more after all if you want friend's you must first show yourself friendly. If possible change location or move to a new area. Get out more and live, you will be shocked that you stumble on your true love while your busy having fun.
ReplyDeletePoster 2 - The 1st year of marriage is usually tough and when there is a baby on the scene it could make things tougher. Sit your man down and tell him how you really feel and also find out if work stress is adding to his being distant. You should consider cooking him romantic dinners while someone watches the baby or taking him out for lunch or surprise him at the office with lunch and text or send him messages telling him how you miss him and cant wait for him to get home. Best of luck as you enjoy the ride called Marriage!
poster 1 stay positive. me never marry and am forty plus. I put my trust in God. It will be well with you. You will soon get job or better still go and learn a trade. How you get money self take do this internet and come dey blog. Try and keep urself busy. stop complaining.
ReplyDeleteposter 2, some men are like dat. I know one man that loves kids outside but hate his own. no ready to touch his boy that time.
Am sure your husband na yeye man. Mr. Fart fart abi na messy messy
@love me jeje- the Lord is your muscle. He will come, IJNA.
ReplyDeleteMnwh, what you said is true oh. How she take money dey do data for blog? How she dey feed and clothe sef? I am certain there's a stream of income somewhere. I may be wrong..... Or am I?
Please u people should stop calling the woman selfish (poster 2).. Didn't y'all read the part where she said they live like housemates instead of husband and wife? Abi is it only sex she complained about? Apparently this is someone that was fun loving and all..
ReplyDeleteAnyway madam, I don't even have any advice for u, I was just angry people called u selfish, coz I don't see anything selfish about needing affection and attention from ur partner.
As for the farting and hygiene part, lol... Madam I think it's because u r upset with ur hubby now that's y these nasty sides of him I'm sure u knew about before have become very glaring.. Cos I'm sure the farting and not wiping hands didn't just start.
Now lemme give u the cliché.."sit down and have a talk with him n tell him how u feel, yada yada yada... Or better still, take it to God in prayers.. Goodluck!
Poster 1: it is well.
Hmmmm the institute of marriage is sweet and sour Stella don't you think you just vomited foul shit from your mouth,I agree poster 2 sounded hilarious but some people just don't know how to put their thoughts together when asked to tell it as it is,with your age and being a parent you should know better than to insult this poster.if you can't encourage or correct your fellow woman in love then don't spill bitterness and harsh words. Stella I hardly comment but really you should apologies to poster 2 that was over the top.
ReplyDeleteThis Stella sef and her words sometimes....just grab one of your chairs instead of being overly harsh...
ReplyDeleteposter2 please talk to him and find out if you did something wrong somewhere....If not, ask him what the problem is....
poster, hold unto God....He alone has the answers...Are there secret sins in tour life? Is there a sin from your past you haven't confessed to God to ask for forgiveness? Speak to God....Join in the Our Daily Manna fast...It is day 10 today, and not too late to join in....get the daily devotional and war against haman....fast! and cry to God....and watch your doors open!
Poster1: I clearly understand your plight Co's I've walked that route before. A change of mindset, environment will help. Poster2: it's obvious your sex life is awful,reason Why hubby avoids u.learn the art of love making, be more romantic, create the atmosphere, initiate, don't always expect him to Co's he has a lot on his mind.Yes,farting around your partner shows How close u both are,you should too
ReplyDeleteMen hate dildo, when u buy one aswear yr hubby go sit-up by force as some1 suggested.
ReplyDelete#1 there's nothing God can't do, try change envt.
Poster 1: please just get busy and forget about those problems. Your man is on the way. #HugToYouSwthrt#.
ReplyDeletePoster 2: communication is just the solution here. I knw is annoying esp that farting aspect and not washing hands after using the toilet, #guys.can.fart.for.africa.without.shame, anywhr,anytym# just tell him you are always irritated by it. Can't stop laughing.
POSTER 1-33 years of age and you'v been in just one relationship hmmmm. In as much as ur praying about it, you should try and mingle you should go out to weddings,church programmes,parties...i am sure you have friends that are engaged or married(attend bridal/baby shower,baby's dedication etc).If you do not go out and meet people how do you even have a relationship? At the same time, being married doesn't make u complete. When i was single i was confident, happy, friendly,lovable,playful,etc in other wards i enjoyed myself while single and life was beautiful.Enjoy your single life and keep a free mind, and top it up with prayers trust me love will find you.
ReplyDeletePOSTER 2- You are blaming your hubby for all the wrongs, you also said he has changed. What if you also changed, what if he also claims you are annoying. Try and work on your character/attitude, be the change you want to see.Instead of nagging, take it all to God on ur knees and watch God do wonders in ur home.
Poster 1 pls don't be shy of ur stature,just keep ur self busy!join a group in church like a choir or sumtin u will get to make frds there.its only u that can make ur self happy....poster2 Stella your advice tho Lmaoooo,pls go and meet his family complain to them so that they can hold a family meetin i understand how u feel
ReplyDelete@dazzlinglizzy,One day you shall be noticed by someone and be prayerful and yes I've noticed you but sadly I can't give u a job only my prayers
ReplyDelete@dazzlinglizzy,One day you shall be noticed by someone and be prayerful and yes I've noticed you but sadly I can't give u a job only my prayers
ReplyDeleteyou people should notice dazzlinglizzy lol,swit@ your own is too much is it compulsory you get a job through Stellas blog?Please stop disturbing our blogosphere and get a life
ReplyDelete@second poster.. do u mean to say u've never released the thing (fart) before in his presence? if no, then u are holding back some dirty secret up ur sleeves.. dnt look at me dah way, na so dem talk..
ReplyDeletenow its wrong of him to suddenly extricate himself from u. i could die if a man did dat to me.. wtf? am i some piece of furniture? even though d sex aint coming but there should at least be convo, it is d bedrock of every relationship. so i'd say give him a smelly slap one day on his cheek, lets see if he wont talk.
Number one poster,please leave that house b4 dem give u low blood pressure, u are 33yrs and have had only one relationship?one month, see ehn,just leave that house first,u will feel better,trust God,u will get a job,pls stop running to these days churches,focus on developing ur relationship with Jesus thru reading the Holy Bible,Holy spirit will teach you. Number two poster,u are very correct about needing love,sex and attention from your husband,ur marriage is still young na,una never turn grandpa and grandma yet. Stella sugar,take am easy on the babe o,sex na food o! Inside marriage,u suppose know na. Ok oh! I don talk finish,am not feeling fine,but my mouth no dey carry last for commenting things.lol.
ReplyDeleteBefore I start,I have observed that most of the narrators on chronicles platform lie too much,but my mouth is sealed sha.Number one poster,please leave that house b4 dem give u low blood pressure, u are 33yrs and have had only one relationship?one month, see ehn,just leave that house first,u will feel better,trust God,u will get a job,pls stop running to these days churches,focus on developing ur relationship with Jesus thru reading the Holy Bible,Holy spirit will teach you. Number two poster,u are very correct about needing love,sex and attention from your husband,ur marriage is still young na,una never turn grandpa and grandma yet. Stella sugar,take am easy on the babe o,sex na food o! Inside marriage,u suppose know na. Ok oh! I don talk finish,am not feeling fine,but my mouth no dey carry last for commenting things.lol.
ReplyDeleteBefore I start,I have observed that most of the narrators on chronicles platform lie too much,but my mouth is sealed sha.Number one poster,please leave that house b4 dem give u low blood pressure, u are 33yrs and have had only one relationship?one month, see ehn,just leave that house first,u will feel better,trust God,u will get a job,pls stop running to these days churches,focus on developing ur relationship with Jesus thru reading the Holy Bible,Holy spirit will teach you. Number two poster,u are very correct about needing love,sex and attention from your husband,ur marriage is still young na,una never turn grandpa and grandma yet. Stella sugar,take am easy on the babe o,sex na food o! Inside marriage,u suppose know na. Ok oh! I don talk finish,am not feeling fine,but my mouth no dey carry last for commenting things.lol.
ReplyDeleteNarrator 1, Sspiritual husband is involved. I am speaking from experience.As you have gone to MFM and no improvement. It is about time you investigate into your lineage and inside your family by asking your mother questions! Where did she go or what did she do when she was pregnant for you? View your friends, somebody has tampered with your destiny. Keep praying and going for deliverance.
ReplyDeleteNarrator 2, welcome to the married world! When we come to SDK to lament about our husbands, young single ladies like you will be giving advise: dress sexy. Cook delicacies. Spice up your marriage, blah, blah, similar to what I have been reading above. What advise do you want yo hear again than sit him down and talk to him. Pray for him. And be patient with him. Learn to be like the Proverbs 31 woman!
Ms Stella since I started my period yesterday, I have been in a shitty mood! *naughty grin*
Poster 1
ReplyDeleteChange your friends,environment and get busy.Update your wardrobe and change your mindset.
Poster 2
You sound like a nag and a nympho!Control your libido and concentrate on yourself(look sweet) and baby for now.Stop monitoring your hubby by checking if he washes his hands after using the toilet.Go and look for a job!
Everyone is entitled to their opinion but a few people on this blog don't have a mind of their own. They tend to give advice based on which way Stella sways.
ReplyDeleteI don't think the married poster is self-centered. Even if she is, is the hubby not selfish as well for ignoring her and denying his wife sex?? She has a valid problem which I'd admit she isn't handling with enough maturity. Poster 2, like most people have also rightly said, talk and listen. You could plan a surprise date night where u both go out and chat over dinner. He may have sth bothering him or irritating him as well. If you do talk and there is nothing, then I'm afraid he may be hiding sth from you or cheating. There is no smoke without fire. But just talk first and air your own issues. I'm sure sth positive will come out it.
You definitely have to caution ur hubby about his poor hygiene. A grown man doesn't know to wash his hands after using the toilet?? I don't get it oh. It is bad and could cause illness and there is even a baby in the house. It's appalling. As for his farting, that's something you're gonna have to ignore and bear.
Goodluck
Dear Poster 1,
ReplyDeleteI understand how being unemployed for a long time can deplete your self-confidence, energy, motivation and even faith. I've been in this situation myself. While waiting for the job, you can begin a small business or volunteer or both. ANYTHING you do counts believe me. Please don't waste any more years sitting at home and doing nothing okay. The truth is God always gives us opportunities and we have to keep our eyes and mind open to spot them.
You've been getting many no's. One day you'll get a yes IJN.
Also try to make urself more visible by going out more, joining groups even in church, playing sports and of course praying. It also takes one day for a good man to notice you. As I'm typing this, I am also giving myself advice coz we are in the same boat in terms of job and relationship. There are days when it gets very depressing but God's Word has been my source of hope and strength. Do you live in Abuja? I wish we could communicate one on one and help and encourage each other.
Goodluck
@poster2
ReplyDeleteYour husband has only just realized he married a bimbo!
If he finds a female colleague who knows how to massage his ego,listens to him and gives him intelligent solutions,know your marriage is gone.
Massage his ego,speak positively into his life,be kind and nice to him and STOP NAGGING.
God help his people
ReplyDelete