IN HOUSE NEWS ON Thursday...

Una doh!...I just come back from church  and had an embarrassing moment there..OMG.

MY MOST EMBARRASSING MOMENT JUST HAPPENED!!!

My son is altar boy in church and today is public holiday here.There were some
church activities today in which he took part so i decided to go along with him cos i love to see him doing his thing and i feel so proud when his eyes meet mine and i wink at him.
So as i siddon oh,i started remembering that most hilarious post with the embarrassing moments.I remembered the guy in church who slept off and landed on the ground and i laughed..almost loud.

E no reach five minutes i begin fight with sleep oh....I just bind the sleep begin smile.Mind you the church was full oh.
So i use side eyes scan my surrounding then face pastor back.

Before i know i didnt even know i slept off but the blonde lady near me touched my back lovingly,i just bone face turn look her.She smile and i smile back..I didnt know why she even touched me so i increased my frown..

This happened like three times oh and then i realised what was happening.

I come bend head small position the bible of songs like say i dey find something,the next thing i know the book land for ground and my head hit the 
book stand in front of me...it was a loud noise and everyone around me looked my way and others were turning..na so me sef red for face but i bone begin turn head sef.....
I wait small and then i kuku get up go outside becos the sleep was coming full force again...As soon as i got up,sleep vanish for my eyes!
I go avoid that side for a while oh..LMAO

Una doh oh
signed -SDK
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AMEBO GIST -THE BET

Hello my people ooo

Tory don land ooo

Sweet pass mama nnukwu one ooo

Will honor those whom honor is due to later..
straight to the yans.

E get one bros for my compound, him bedroom for him flat na side by side our (me and my cousin dey share one room) bedroom for our flat, wetin divide am na wall. True to God ehn, this bros fine and na correct banker but e just do wedding. Before this bros do him wedding, Him get this two ladies wey he dey friend, but as bro no dey follow anybody yan na, we dey use their ringtone sabi dem... one dey halla "fuck,shit, harder, fuck"...like that sha, the other one dey shout "jesus, baby, jesus abi na baby jesus".

Me and my yeye cousin hear say bro wan marry oo,na him we bet. i say na the one wey dey do "fuck shit"he go marry as na dat one come pass and na dem play pass, my cousin say na the other one as she go sabi pray well well, say men dey like settle with prayer warrior at the end. 

when first bros pack come the house, we don know say the walls no dey soundproof but bros never still know...so bros do wedding this Saturday wey pass, everybody for the compound go but we still no fit decide which one he marry, them go honey moon and them return yesterday but no body know ... na as my cousin begin hear "JESUS, BABY, JESUS, BABY JESUS", She come wake me say as i dey show from work tomorrow make i bring am him 5k. make una see me see trouble ooo

BUT why this bros deceive me like so na... him sabi do i love u play too much with the other lady, you go think say sister Jesus na side chick.

MY BLOG NAME NA KORKUDEMUS... i get plenty gist ooo

See en,i just post this amebo gist make e no be like say i no wan support your huslte at being funny but na God i take beg you,nor try am send me any amebo gist again otherwise i go turn to octopus give you ten slaps at once like that poster for chronicles yesterday.hisssss

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LAND FOR SALE

I have two plots of land for sale in Ajah area in Lagos

They are N6.5M each, but price is negotiable.

Interested buyers should please call 08027111230.

Thanks.

Hmmm interesting!...wetin be last price and na which side exactly for Ajah?

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HOUSE FOR RENT IN PORT HARCOURT

There is a 2 bedroom flat available for rent in Elelenwo, 

Port Harcourt.24 hours water supply, tiled, fenced compound with parking space available, .

Interested persons contact : 08169031101

Thank you

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LET'S TAKE ALICE TO WONDERLAND

 I'm Annang Princess(blog ID) and I'm writing in because I want to make one of my closest friends feel extra special on her wedding day which comes up 2nd weekend of next month(11&13). Her name Alice Omini and she's one of the most hardworking females I know after my mum. Knew her in passing when we were both in Awgu camp(NYSC) in Enugu state ,different platoons but the same hostel. We were posted to the same Udi LGA, served in the same school and were flatmates through out service year. She's one of the realest people you'd ever meet, prayer warrior, defender, care-giver, cheerleader, good cook, hard worker, and chaste too if you know what I mean. I could go on and on but I'm trying to keep it short. 

          She hasn't gotten a job since we finished service in Feb 2014. The liquid soap/disinfectant/air freshener production she started hasn't really kicked off enough to bring in gains. She feels like a burden to her fiance because she isn't contributing towards the ceremony at all and he's just an upcoming young man so they need all the help they can get(he has a job o before awon ITK come to say he doesn't have money/job and he wants to marry) . She's from a humble background so her family helping out is out of it. I just thought to use this platform to reach out to single ladies(or men) who want to tap into this marriage institution to sow into Alices' big day in whatever way you can.


 Be it prayers, souvenirs, your services, financially, etc. Let's make her feel less sorry for herself/fiance. Whatever you think they will need to make their day fabulous or even their lives as a newly married couple. 

         She doesn't know I'm doing this and she didn't even ask me to. I'm just an oversabi friend who wants the bestest for a beautiful soul. She's in Calabar running around and the wedding will be in Calabar too (even if you aren't in Calabar you can waybill whatever *big grin*). I have attached a few pre-wedding shots.  

I'll be sure to send in wedding pictures. Her phone no is08104140002 and mine is 08061161741 if I can be of assistance . And if you don't have anything to contribute you can send her a 4naira text wishing her and hubby well. I trust God will use some of you to be an answer to her prayers. 

   Forgive the 'epistle'. Hugs and kisses all day every day . 

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Amebo Gist from the stable of lekwa ukwu

Good day stellakork,this Amebo just land now now and e dey hot,na from my hood e just happen..

As today be rag day for my school so all dis 100 level students their morale dey high dem dey happy dem don dey prepare wait today sef as today con reach dem enter town go hustle come back....as all of dem con come back dem gist count their money dem go bath,buy drug,find sumtin chop e.t.c.

E con get dis babe, she enter say she wan go bath na shout she shout come outside ''owo mi oo,awon ole,oloriburuku awon omo ale won ti gbe mi lowo lo,egba mi oo'' 

(thief,bastard dey don carry ma money)from her words we don code say dem don thief her money she con dey beg say if na play make dem stop am oo and if e get anybody wey carry am make the person return am.

 1 hour go nobody turn up na so the babe vex call her bobo and the guy na soldier ghen ghen.Before we blink eye the guy don mobilize hin people come, dem come bring all of us come outside threaten us say if we no provide the money dem go carry us go quarter guard and barb our hair say because say we be girls nai go make dem pity us barb our hair but if to say we be boys dem for beat us blue and black.

dem con tell us make we go inside make everybody go check their room if they see anytin wey no be there own bring am come outside,even the soldier join us small dey find am sef as e be say na inside kpangolo the money dey, nai dey go check dustbin come see am dere ooo.

The soldiers con tell us to go back to our room and con tell us make dem no hear say anybody fight oo say if dem hear we go hear wen....na later later the girl con confess say she sweep her room dat time wey she come back from her ragness say maybe na dat time she pack her money in the kpangolo join dirty...she con beg us make we nor vex.

Thank God say we see soldier man babe kpangolo sha 

Keep a date with us for more happenings around

Signed lekwa ukwu

*Yawns...no partiality,all amebo gist must be posted but make una try emulate mama Nnuku Kork now,at least her gist dey sweet or e go make person vexs but this amebo wan make me sleep....*yawns*

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AMEBO FROM WAFFI CITY. - RITUALIST HAIR DRESSER?

I greet you stellakorkson, Diwor!!!
Blog visitors i greet una specially, Una doe.

Make i nak una tori o, so yesterday I dey my shop, naim before I look, I see like 3 keke stop opposite my shop with plenty guy-es, naim them enter the saloon when dey opposite me, my antenna just stand once, wetin i hear na "just lock your shop make you enter this keke,  for my mind na shuo wetin this girl don do na(she's very quiet and calm o, she makes my hair too)

 she was like wetin I do na, before I look, them don tear her Chinese slap.........naim one of our neighbour come say wetin she do, faith wetin you do????.

 faith don dey cry o, she say she no do anytin o, naim one of the Guy-es say make una no teach us our work abeg, who know say e like am well well make e come our Secretariat for alaka, EBABO!!! 

As them one go naim one of the boys say we go f**k your tohtoh taya today, ha! MY FATHER, MY LORD!!! na dream I dey so........

I just perm for one corner they soji o, cos me I sabi shele for katakata o(no tink am, I be ajebutter). As them they go, one other  girl when get saloon for my side they laugh say God don purnish you today(them dey beef theirsefs, based on same line of business) 

na so them carry faith go, one electrician bros come follow them for back.......we com stand they yan o, say wetin faith don do na, be like say e serious o.....naim i go back to my duty post o. GBAM! Almost an hour later, naim the same set of guy-es come again, faith they cry, all her face and eyes don swell up, naim she point the other girl when get saloon say na she be kate, O BOBBY!!! 


Before we know Na Japanese slap and beat naim we hear o, naim them say na you be Kate abi? She say yes, wetin I do na? Why una they beat me na(dey blink her longgg purple lashes)......... Na different talk we start to hear from the guy-es o, you don die today, ashawo, ritualist, thief, your cup don full today, wetin we hear na, naim kate just hala say "I go talk, make una no beat me"........

shuoooo!!!

 For my mind this is a serious something o................. abeg make una no para, my thumb don they pain me. To be continued tomorrow.

NA ME WARRIGIRL***

Hhehehehehhehehe you be real waffy,see as you use slang tear gist!...make sure say you end am tomorrow oh,no carry over for gist unless e sweet.i dey like the suspense *side eyes at BVs*

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SCHOLARSHIP FOR ORPHANS

Hello Stella Nwanyioma, please, help me post this in IHN as it will go a long way to help orphans who have the zeal for university Education...

They can apply on the website below:

‎www.samamagafoundation.org/apply

‎Deadline: May 29, 2015. For More inquiries call: 08034622690, 08174364192, 09036804381

Please anyone who knows an orphan can still forward this to him/her...I pray they all get 

favoured in Jesus name..

Thank you so much Stella Nwanyioma, May God fulfill all your heart desires...well done!!!

(BV,Chysugar)

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LAND FOR SALE

Stella love greetings!! Please I have 30 plots of land for sale at Lekki Free Trade Zone at Ibeju Lekki LGA of Lagos. Its located just close to the Eko Tourist Resort and the Dangote Refinery. It also has government gazette. Each plot goes for 2million

 Interested buyers should call 08123043506 for enquiries.

Two million only? e sheep oh.....

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DESERT CATERER SEEKS PATRONAGE

I am a professional dessert caterer, I provide dessert services, cocktails and also set up sweet / candy stations for weddings, parties and all kinds of events.

I am pleading for patronage from BV's and promising that all BVs that contacts us for our services would get a 20% discount.

We are located in Ajah, Lagos State and can work within and outside Lagos, ‎

We can be reached on 08074339878 or email maryann_ena@yahoo.com

Thank you Stella for this platform

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VACANCY IN NEW SCHOOL.

The vacancy is for teachers for Nursery and primary classes. Would be best for BVs living around Alagbado/kollington,alakuko etc. The pay isn't fantastic because it is a new school. 
They also need a young girl who is maybe awaiting result for the post of a bus assistant. I can be reached via this email. (Meygan2005@yahoo.com).

Warm regards


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GIVEAWAY FROM NAIJAFLO.COM

Good morning stella. I have chosen the winners for the shirts and suits giveaway. Got a little confused as to who to pick. Wanted just two but had to add more people. You’re really trying. God will continue to bless you.

They are:

• Sassypearl9@gmail.com
• maduakoronyinye@yahoo.com
• queendarlinnamani@gmail.com
• Onome22@yahoo.com
• glowynstar@gmail.com
• Belloadetutu93@gmail.com
• maureenchibueze@gmail.com

The recipients should please send their phone numbers and their location to lovebloging205@gmail.com. 

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*Vacancy in GRID Foundation.

Position: Office Assistant.

Qualification: An Ordinary National Diploma with a minimum of 2 years experience within an office environment. S/he must be computer literate.

Sex: Preferably female.

Duties: Ability to travel out of town, supervise workmen, receive and keep mails, file documents, attend workshops and help as workshop assistant, ability to keep surroundings clean at all times and participate in market duties.

How to apply: Interested and qualified candidates should send their CV to austin@gridconsulting.net latest by Thursday, 14th May, 2015. Dead line today

Best regards

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YOU WANNA SLIM DOWN?

Please I want to you to help me use your blog as a means to advertise my business. I am Grace and I sell health, body and beauty care products (waist trainers, beauty care and hair products)

I have slimming product that you will can use in 9 days and loose as much as 15kg and trust me you don't need to visit the gym everyday. I also have body toning kit that will get rid of flabby arms, tummy and thighs. I also have hair products, facial products, body care products are also available for sale. 

These products are not scam and trust me they produce amazing results. I have pictures as proof but will not want to put people out here without their permission.

For women trying to loose weight, burn the fat and loose baby weight etc (the big tummy after their babies), trust me this products is for you and it will produce amazing and visible results I can guarantee you that. Even if you are not trying to lose weight and just want to remain trim and look good, you can use this product too and it will deliver amazing results.

Hair products and body care products are also available for sale.

Blog Visitors can reach me on : 08173472714

MTN 400 - 322781228847

GLO 200 - 334855451087673

ETISALAT 200 - 690868087888075

AIRTEL 200 - 5826838507749474

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MAKE UP ARTIST WANTED

Hi, please I need a make up artist who is very good and based in delta for my wedding. It would be an advantage if the person is good with highlights and contouring and of course gele tying.please contact me on kuisinekonsult@gmail.com. Thanks

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            Urgent Vacancies

A  reputable Mortgage Bank with the head office at Victoria Island and branches at Ajah, Gbagada, Festac  and Abuja want highly dynamic, self motivated, hard working Marketing officers for a 6 month Market Storm.

Contract to end in December.

Interested candidates who should possess SSCE/OND/BSC/HND certificate should send their C.V’S to:

recruitment@synergyinsight.net with subject as Storm Mkt on or before Thursday 14^th 2015,

Drivers also required, but must reside around Ketu, Mile12, Ojodu berger, Ibafo.

Salaries: very attractive

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EARLY MORNING CALL

Hi Mrs Korks, you are an amazing woman, a humanitarian and i love your blog for all that it is..Bigger you I pray..You have a unique way of blogging indeed its worth emulating..Thank You for being You!!
 
To my gist, *smiles* Got a fraudulent call this morning oh so I decided to write hopefully it gets published...
It was a morning call from an unknown caller...
Mr A: Hello is this ********(my native name)
Me: Yes it is good morning.
Mr A: I am engr Amadi * fake name* from Nigerian Agip oil company. Your cv was submitted to us and we would like to know your area of specialization *procurement, Logistics, or rig.
Me: My cv mr! Can't remember submitting any cv to Agip and i know Agip is not recruiting so I'm just confused..
Mr A: you should be happy..its a miracle many are praying for this call maybe someone submitted it for you...
Me: How did you get to know my native name only family call me that all other documents bears my English name and surname...
Mr A: *harsh tone* stop asking irrelevant questions..call me back by 9:30am*ends call*
Me: Still confused called my dad to verify if he at any time sent my CV to Agip company..of course he said no..I was like ok I will call Mr A again much later..

You all know the True caller app, well! I did a search for Mr A's person using his number and found out he's a police man  and not an Agip company worker.. Called back by the said time no answer after the 4th dial Mr A answered and said he was in a meeting with the board of directors deliberating our employment since my name is on the list but since I'm not from an oil producing area *confused me there* i'm to pay some money for him to help talk to the board members so they consider me..

That was when I got angry and called the name I got from true caller *Insp Zone* and told him i  have his details and also that he being a police officer should be ashamed of himself for using Agip company's name for fraudulent acts.. immediately his voice became tiny and he said madam I was only trying to help.. Me was like help ke! In what way..extorting money from people or how? and then he was like OK I see you are not interested and he ended the call and switched off the phone..

My people!!! There are mean guys out there that are ready to use your details for their own gain... Be careful who you give attention to and don't accommodate fraudulent calls some of them can manipulate people..Imagine that I'm  seriously job hunting or desperate for a bigger company of course Agip is one that would have made it so easy for him...He knows my native name that means he's someone close....Most times our enemies are within...Let's all be careful..

All my phone calls are recorded so i can actually report him for an arrest or I should just let the matter be...still don't know..
Mrs Korks!! Well done oo.. Much Love!!!

Report the matter to who?Police?I naff in waffy!

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Signing out

StellaKORK

Blognalist and proud social entrepreneur.