Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative.

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STAND ALONE NARRATIVE

LET GO OR HANG ON?

Good morning Stella,

My name is Harry,I am 32 years, a graduate for almost 5years but unemployed. I am based in Lagos but from Delta State.

The essence of this mail to you is to seek the advice of BVs concerning my relationship. I have a girlfriend whom I love with everything there is to love a woman. She is my perfect kind of woman. We have been dating for 6years now.

 While she is gainfully employed, I am still searching for job ever since I graduated. I am not a lazy guy but the job ain't coming.

It wasn't my intention to still be single at 32, my plan was to settle at 28years if everything went the way I planned it from secondary school, but as at 28years, I was just graduating from the university as some things came up along the line that disrupted my plans, yet I didn't give up but still kept another plan of settling down at 32, but still, here I am with no job at 32.

I am from a morally upright family who believes in good values, and with parents always reminding me of the dangers of being desperate, involving myself with dirty schemes to get money and so for this reason my parents still assist me financially, even though I don't like to take from them, but they understand the country's situation and encourage me not to reject their assistance. Though it hurts to still see them give me, but I have no choice than to accept their assistance.I Am grateful to God.

Now, my girlfriend and I used to be an item as we would talk and chat on social media. And whenever she closed from work, she would call me first before reaching her home or immediately she gets home. 

A month ago, I discovered that all these are changing. Two weeks ago, she came to visit me but while in my house (my family home) she was talking on phone with a guy for almost 20mins. I didn't say anything. I also discovered that she has been chatting with this same guy on whatsapp and sometimes they chat till 00.00hrs , and this is a lady who says she hates typing for long, But the chat with this male friend is becoming intense. 

I am not the type that confronts my partner because I would end up feeling like I am jealous or less of a man, I am not the jealous type but I don't feel alright with her recent change of behavior as communication between us has dropped to the extent that some days we don't talk at all on phone, moreover it makes me feel bad, probably because I don't have a job yet.

Now, I want to seek the advice of fellow BVs what to do. Do I call off this affair or what? She is 30years and I know age isn't on her side and I am putting much effort to secure a job so I can legalize our union.

 Her friends and colleagues are also pressurizing her and asking her when is her wedding taking place, so for these and other reasons, she becoming desperate for marriage ( though i don't blame her, she is a woman). My family knows her and everyone likes her. She has no problem with my family. 

I have been with only her ever since I started dating and have never cheated. She has been getting ''toasting'' from other men, and somehow I feel I am the obstacle in her life. She is a classy lady so the admirations from men is high. Also, she is always reminding me of the fact that she is getting old. I feel she has gotten another guy and she is weighing the options, I don't want to be an option to someone.

So, BVs, abeg make una give me advice.

Harry have you tried talking to her?you already have an inferiority complex becos of your jobless state so its possible that its confusing you to read meanings into thing.Have a heart to heart talk with her so that you will know the next step to talk.You sound like a really really good man and i pray that she doesnt break your heart.

I feel so bad for you.I imagined you crying as you were typing this sef...

Sit her down and have a heart to heart and let her go if that is what she wants.

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