Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Sunday In House Gists

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Sunday, February 21, 2016

Sunday In House Gists

Saturday in house gists,had gists one to five...
Enjoy today's gists and good luck to whoever wins......
A winner was paid yesterday.....






GIST 6
THE COPIER

I remember this incident that happened when I was in Jss2, there's the boy called makinwa.Makinwa scored 4/20 in his test.
He was so disappointed and decided to make a case.
He walked up to the teacher and said "Ma! I think i deserve something higher than 4"
Teacher "Why?"
Makinwa replied "Am sure i wrote well"
"Will you get out of my office!" The teacher ordered.
Makinwa went straight to the VP(vice principal) office and report the teacher to him.
The VP filled the case and invited makinwa, the teacher, class teacher and some of the school teacher to our class, then VP ask makinwa to bring his answer script and teacher to bring her question script. After the teachers went through the question and makinwa answers, One of the teacher turn to makinwa and said
"Why do you think you should have scored higher?"
Makinwa replied " That's because the person i copied from got 16/20. And am sure i copied everything" laugh wan kill everybody that day.., na so dey give makinwa 1month suspension. Since then I sure I copied all we dey call makinwa....he(makinwa)
Later became our head boy when will reached sss3 shaa...irony of life lol

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GIST 7
DOUBLE GISTS

hello bvns
I have gists for you.
when I was much younger, my siblings and I used to do farting
competition. we were always trying to out do each other on whose fart
was the loudest. My mum kept warning us to desist fron the habit as it
might embarrass us someday but we no gree hear.
So this fateful day, I was in the room when  my younger sis walked in
and told me to go check out the kinda shoes our visitor was  wearing.
I was already planning to surprise my sister with a a very loud fart
but decided to go check the visitor's shoe first.
On my way out, my mum called me to go serve the visitor drink. so I
carried the drink and entered the sitting room.
when I saw the shoe, I almost fainted. It wasa canoe shoe, those kinda
shoes that the front will be bent upward. it was quite a funny view. I
wanted to laugh out loud but decided against it.
when I bent down to drop thedrink on the table, the fart i was trying
to withhold came out with the loudest sound ever!
I was transfixed. the visitor laughed  it off but the kinda beating i
recieved that day was enough to wake the dead.
that marked the end of farting competition in my house.



SECOND GIST

Recently, i was sweeping my school compound. It is a very large
compound and it was quite busy that Saturday morning. Everybody was
outside doing clean-up.
I was singing away my life when i felt somebody tap my waste and the
loudest fart i have ever heard escaped from my anus.
I turned around and lo it was this cute toaster that i have been doing
shakara for.
I almost died!
everybody burst out laughing. All those mgbeke girls i have been
forming levels for had a field day laughing at me.
I ran inside my room and locked my self in.
That was how I packed my bag and left school the next day(school was
on strike but I was hanging around hoping to spend val with my boo)
I am show the whole thing will die down when they will finally call
off the strike.



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GIST 8
FUFU PHONE


Happened 8 years ago. I wanted to buy phone @ computer village and I had 13k with me. As I was checking from one phone seller to another I hear one bro for my back saying "bros yeh, you wan buy phone?Come buy this music express phone na, very cheap and affordable with perfect functionality" Na so I carry my leg go meet the guy o.

I checked through the phone and it was working fine, I dialled some numbers and spoke with two to three people and it was awesome. I stylishly asked the guy what the fault of the phone is and he said no issues at all and that he needs money to buy another phone.
I priced the phone and he said 8k, I was like sho but as I sharp guy( I think I was ) I told him I can only pay 6.5k and at last he agreed. I remembered I have been scammed one time like that at oshodi where I bought a phone for 3.5k only for the guy to hand over a scrap to me and also called some guys to give me sweet slap to say the least so remembering that scenario, I acted smartly this time(I think say I wise). 

I told the guy that I will hand over the cash to him after he hands over the phone to me on the bikeand the bike will take off to avoid a recurrence of what I experienced at oshodi. He agreed and we called a random bike man.I climbed the bike, he gave me the phone and I gave him the money and zoom I instructed the bike man. After some distance, I looked back and I saw the guy smiling so I smiled back and also waved him with my 32 teeth widely opened.

Immediately I got to the bus stop at Ikeja under bridge, I entered sango bus direct and I was happy I now have a good phone for just 6.5k. All this while I did not check the phone I was holding not until I got to iyana ipaja where I feel it is safe to check the phone.
I press the end call button but no light showed up so I was thinking it must have been switched off by the guy. So as I pressed switched on button, I noticed one white object popping out and I was like what is this? I smelled it cos it stained my hand and I found out that it is fufu.

 I opened the phone and saw how fufu was packaged as phone for me. The man for my side just dey look me dey laugh. I no fit talk self, I just jejely put am for my pocket dey go house. Na so them take sell fufu for me for 6.5k





85 comments:

  1. Let a winner emerge



    *Larry was here*

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's how gist 8 just came & stole d show.
      I vote gist 8.

      Delete
    2. Stella, pls indulge me this once. It's a noble idea to groom funny writers on ur blog. It is also a good decision on ur part to post all with d gbagauns intact as correcting these would b an uphill time-wasting task.

      However. I think it will help them better if d prize goes to d funny ones who do not have any (or maybe fewer) gbagaun in their construction.

      people who claim to have passed through secondary and even tertiary institutions speak such bad English, it's disheartening to imagine what tomorrow holds for our youths.

      I have read comments like English is not my first language... yet those who write so do not even have a good command of vernacular; spoken or written.

      Now one can write d abridged (social media) form n' it doesn't take away from d tenses or meaning what's written, cos it clearly shows when d person is being funny or when auto correct wants to shame itself..

      My observation is on d part of d story contributors and not d commentators.

      That said, I admire d humour, flair and creativity u bring to blogging. All ur staples (IHN, RHI, COBVN, SL, DIHS, NBT, LT, WP, etc) as well as d comments from all d BVs, all inform, educate, entertain engage, as well as open up d mind to different perspectives,

      More grease to ur elbows, and may ur oil not burn out!!!

      Delete
  2. I vote gist 8..lol..can imagine how foolish u must have felt..No. .Next time go to a shop preferably Slot wen u want 2 get a new phone..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Was there slit 8yrs ago? A new phone with 6k5?

      Delete
    2. Na second hand phone he wan buy and yes there was slot 8 yrs ago

      Delete
  3. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Akuko ifo!
      Send in epistle 2

      Delete
    2. Go to his twitter acct and express yourself. It's more effective and efficient. Sorry about what you guys went thru

      Delete
    3. If what you are saying is true,go to twitter or Facebook. He is active on these too.
      Get off SDK.
      As a mass comm student, common sense could have told you that..

      Delete
    4. Wetin sef, e never do? Abi u wan trend ni. Birthday aff finish so mbok move on with ur life and leave SBB alone

      Delete
  4. Replies
    1. That phone gist, have heard abt diff experiences but what I don't get is, do they switch the phones and give u a fufu-packed one after u must have examined the good phone or is it jazz?

      Delete
    2. They actually switch the fone when you are not looking. If you are smart u would hold on to the one u were given while bargaining.

      Delete
  5. I vote for gist 8...Av experienced dat shii b4

    ReplyDelete
  6. Lol I vote gist 8, reminded me of my dad who went to buy road side phone, not knowing that it was stone that was sold to him

    ReplyDelete
  7. I'm just pissed Stella. Fufu phone was on nairaland word for word and one person has gone to copy it.
    Anyway if it's your personal experience then I apologise deeply and success will aways follow you. You will be granted all your heart desires.

    However if it's not and you win or stop a truthful person from winning (by taking up votes meant for them) then the amount of prize money will forever be your problem.
    Choose wisely. My curses and prayers never fail.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think say na only me notice am! Ole ole ole

      Delete
    2. You are right. The fufu gist was on nairaland. The idiot copied it word for word.

      Stella this is the link.

      http://www.nairaland.com/2934581/ever-been-scammed-before-share

      Scroll down to the middle. Whoever submitted that story should be disqualified. #Plagiarism

      Delete
    3. I remember Stella saying it doesn't have to be a personal gist so what's all this bashing????

      Delete
    4. It doesn't have to be a person just when the other party consents to you using it. Not a popular story that gathered over 60likes and shared. That's just plain stealing.

      Delete
  8. the last story tho......looks smhow.....it ain't Thursday na.....superstory

    ReplyDelete
  9. Abidemi, keep jumping from one blog to d other with this stupid story. We have heard!

    ReplyDelete
  10. I vote gist 8. It also happened to a friend, d only difference was that twas soap. Lol

    ReplyDelete
  11. Gist 7 (double gist)was my favourite

    ReplyDelete
  12. I hate it when ppl write gist about farting competition is disgusting abeg

    ReplyDelete
  13. I hate it when ppl write gist about farting competition is disgusting abeg

    ReplyDelete
  14. Gist 8 got me rotfl and people around are wondering if all is well with me...I give it to gist 8

    ReplyDelete
  15. Abeg I vote gist 8. Lmfao

    ReplyDelete
  16. Gist 8 made me laugh so hard, i vote for it, the gal sweeping n ended up farting when she was startled, i can imagine the shame pele o

    ReplyDelete
  17. Gist 8 for me. Very hilarious. A pack of Fufu for a whooping sum of 6.5k. Can imagine how the guy felt. Lmao.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Hahahahahah gist 8 for sure. The fufu was really an expensive one, I'm sure it wasn't even up to one full wrap... Haha I just can't get over this.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Gist 8 for me.. and when u go bck to return the fufu you will not see dem again

    ReplyDelete
  20. I vote for gist 8. I still wonder hhow they do that fufu thing. Abi na jazz?

    ReplyDelete
  21. Gist 8 joo. Laughing so hard.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Gist 8 should be disqualified. It's a copied gist. I vote gist 7

    ReplyDelete
  23. I vote for Gist 8 cus it rily cracked me up gan ni

    ReplyDelete
  24. Chai! These last 3 are very funny! I really laughed very very hard. Well I think I will give it to gist 7!

    ReplyDelete
  25. It's should not be disqualified,because it has happen to me as well,i went to alaba to buy phone for my mum nd they gave me. Fufu phone.chai my 15k just lost like that ever since then I don't buy phone myself again,i do go with someone

    ReplyDelete
  26. I vote gist 8.

    Chai. You bought expensive fufu. Rotflol

    ReplyDelete
  27. i have read gist 8 word for word already and gist 1 did it for me so i vote gist 1.

    ReplyDelete

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