London Tatafo - Season 8

Una doh oh! Doh doh..

Spring is around the corner.. Yayyyy!! Tatafo cannot wait to waka upandan in the nice weather so to know wetin dey happen for London City. But may our lives not be like the British weather that can like to fall hand sha.

Alright, before I enter the tatafo matter for the day, let me just address some people wey dey come here yab tatafo. Some say I be amebo, you are right. Some call me jobless, you are so wrong. Tatafo na job na. Do you know how much Don King  (white house correspondent) makes per day? Eheh!  

And some complain that some gists are stale, boring.. bla bla bla...

Please understand that Tatafo isn't here to crack jokes or to make anyone laugh. I no be Bovi the comedian biko. What tatafo brings here are REAL life stories and not any form form gist that is intended to humour you, admittedly some scenarios can be entertaining. Also, it doesn't matter how long ago it happened, for as long as it is REAL and it happened in LONDON, it can be reported here at anytime. Una hear? 

We cool ? Thank you.

To the matter.. 

The gist today is inspired by the sordid story of that small girl in Nigeria wey follow aboki go kano. Not to make light of the situation, however, a lot of folks assume that she was, or perhaps is still under the influence of jazz by the aboki. 

Well, my people, something like that happened in this our London not too long ago. Only that the lady involved here isn't a teenager... in fact she's a single mom.. and the man she married is an older Muslim cleric. Otherwise known as "Alfa". 

Hmmmm... things dey sele. 

If you see this lady ehn, she set well well. Slim, light skinned, weird but considerably sexy. There's no tattoo or piercing wey una dey find wey no dey her body. Her name starts with the letter 'T;... and when "funkified" by her language people it can sound like yen yen.. or so... . She also has a light skinned BFF whose last name (Pseudo) is a kind of iron jewelry that women are crazy about.

 She reminds me of ALIYAH's song..."silver nor GOLD I have none"..**Whistling**

Anyway, Rumour has it that this bubbly lady T was hypnotized into marriage by her "alfa" ..now ex lover. So much in love was he with her, that he opened an African store for her in Peckham. Stocked the place with orisirisi goods. People wondered what the attraction was, as she showed him off gleefully. Her 'alfa' DH was nothing like the kind of men she's known to frollick with.

Hmmm..dear people of God, it is always good to keep tab on your friends so that when they start to do the unusual or start to act strangely, you can step in for them. You just might be rescuing someone..you never know. ( I digress).

So.... this pretty lady and the Muslim cleric became an item in town. But her friends didn't stop to marvel and whisper behind her back...they knew something was amiss.

Some people suggested that this lady went to play a 4th fiddle in the old cleric's home because of money, and because her BFF  that I earlier mentioned is also a correct second class citizen to another man who is loaded with cash. Tatafo gathered that the man (Alfa) already has 3 wives who all live in London too.

Tatafo come reason am say dat one no mean anything , sebi Islam allows plenty plenty wives nah. No be so?

This 'nose ringed' yen yen lady celebrated her wedding on Facebook with plenty pictures of her DH, that people started to query whether her Cleric lover had a physical altercation with anyone or animal, which  as a result left him with the indelible lines on his cheeks. The man get plenty strokes of cane inscribed on his face gadagba... Dem say na ojuelegba be him middle name...

May God forgive world people oo ohhh ..

After marriage, Lover girl converted to Islam and started to wear hijab like that small Ese girl did. The question is, was she also hypnotised? Could that have been the case here too?  

Person wey dey go white garment church just changed sharply. But the gist now be say, sadly,  the marriage don kaput. Amebos are saying that the jazz has cleared from her eyes. Soon enough, Tatafo gathered that the Alfa disgraced her by closing down the store that he opened for her. Fiam.. their "love ship" capsized in broad day light and lady T reverted to her old ways. She comot hijab sharp sharp and resumed her white garment tinz, where she's allowed to display her many tattoos and Olympus.

The update is, she now hates the mention or the sight of this man.. amebos say that she is filled with regrets and ashamed that she had anything to do with the man at all.

So therefore, what Tatafo is trying to say here is that these sort of crazy "love" that leaves the victim spell bound does exist everywhere irrespective of age or tribe. And people who think that it is only women that jazz men into marriage got it wrong.. women are victims too. Like in the case of this London sisi and the rookie Alfa. 

This is what we think happened here...

Perhaps she thought that she could swindle the man for quick money codedly, and then chop clean mouth. But the man was many steps ahead of her, then she got stuck and he made sure to let the world know by marrying her ceremoniously.. it was like a feather added to his cap. Lesson to all ladies who think that they are smart. One day una go face wetin pass una. When you jam a correct hypnotic philanderer.

‎To round off this Tatafo, I'd like to announce that we the association of London informants rejoice with this lady T. We celebrate her liberation from the shackles of the "by force love".... and we wish her well as she continues in her quest to find TRUE everlasting love. Everyone deserves to love and be loved. 

Even me Tatafo can love like whosai.... but I no mind if rich man can fit to jazz me oh. And I no send anybody to rescue me when it does happen. Just comot eye..

Signing out 

London Tatafo 

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