Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Saturday In House Gists!

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Saturday, August 06, 2016

Saturday In House Gists!

Today is freestyle with the gists...If you know anything funny that will blow our minds away and crack our ribs,please ride on with it.







GIST 1

Yesterday,I kissed a frog and i liked it..hehehehehehehhehehe

Thanks
SDK

*side eyes*


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GIST 2

It goes like this,i would type in english and pidgin
When i was 10yrs old ,i and my dad went to Mushin to buys some goods
so i was famished then i told my dad,we saw a restaurant across the
road  then we went in ,it was an igbo restaurant so my dad asked the
woman to serve us rice and ofe aku(banga stew) we were served while
were eating my dad decided to use the bathroom so he left,i dont know
the spirit that entered me i ate my food finish and i started licking
the plate CHOI the food was too sweet ,before i could get my self
back,my dad was standing in front with shock on his face while the
woman selling the food was like CHAI SO I CAN COOK thank God sha
nobody was in the restaurant but shame catch me o,I leave you to
imagine what my dad said on our way back home
Any way i hope i made you laugh and to stella i love your blog.THANKS









20 comments:

  1. Gist 2
    The food too sweet, abi the food no do u?
    Eri-eri!
    No provoke me, talk wetin the queen of this blog fit talk oo.😀
    That ur papa sef!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My tots exactly. D food sweet abi e no belle full you

      Delete
    2. Poster! If bovi n the rest started like this, their carriers for dun decay inside 6ft.

      Dun ever in ur life say this to anyone anymore be it toddlers or teenagers.

      Delete
    3. No you did not make me laugh. Ahn Ahn what is this?

      Delete
  2. *On my Rustication for 2 Semesters*

    By *Hon. Comr. Emmanuel Afolabi (#AFOO)*

    _“We have come too far, struggled too hard, sacrificed too much and have so much left to do, to allow that which we have achieved for the good of all to be swept away without a fight. And we have not forgotten how to fight.”_ – Lane Kirkland.

    The management of our dear University of First Choice – the enviable University of Lagos (UNILAG) has made it obvious to us that they do not see protest as a right; they have decided to rusticate student leaders (including me) who led the University of Lagos Students’ Union (ULSU) protest of 6th, 7th and 8th April 2016, giving between 2 and 4 semesters rustication.
    As if the suspension of our Union is not enough, they invited us to a disciplinary panel and have now taken their decision. *They have shown us that they are anti-students, they have told us that they do not care about our welfare on campus, they have allowed ego to overshadow logical reasoning; their actions have exposed their weaknesses.*

    The Senate of our University have committed an error by their decision to rusticate me (and some other Union leaders) when the matter is pending before the Court of Law – their action can be interpreted to be a contempt of Court. Some of us saw this coming, because we know how they operate.

    *I have formally appealed against my rustication in a letter to the Pro-Chancellor and Chairman of Council of the University. I won’t stop there; the Honourable Minister of Education and the two Chambers of the National Assembly will soon receive petitions against the UNILAG management from me pending the time the Court will deliver judgment on the matter, the petitions will be supported by every necessary document.* I will explore every means to fight this injustice.

    Let me use this medium to inform you all that I remain strong, in fact, I am stronger; I am not the kind of leader that will dive into the Ocean and later complain of cold – this is just a phase that will soon pass. *I am also very positive that I won’t spend a day longer than expected in this school; I will graduate at the appropriate time and we will be vindicated by the Grace of God.*

    This post will not be complete without my appreciation to all those who have shown concern through calls, messages and other means, I am grateful. To those who have shown no concern too, I appreciate you. Thank you all very much.
    I must also appreciate my Family, especially my wonderful siblings who understand me and respect my decisions at all times, you all are the best.

    _“If a man hasn’t discovered something that he would die for, he isn’t fit to live.”_ – Martin Luther King Jnr.

    Yours,
    #AFOO

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Afoo.. You guys need to calm down and let somethings be.. This whole thing could have been averted from the beginning before you people carried leaves and forced, yes forced! other students to join you in the protest.. The protest was the wrongest I saw; locking school gates, leaving students of ISL stranded in school, visitors and business men stranded in school!.. This whole thing should have been thought of carefully before you protested.
      I'm not trying to justify school because right now, every student have been affected (Imagine no activities in school from 6pm)!
      In all, we can only hope and pray that school revoke their decisions to rusticate you people for four semesters!

      Delete
    2. @Rocky jst shut your mouth if u have nthn sensible to say. We were fucking fighting for the students right.

      Delete
  3. This happened about 10years ago... Sister A was in V/I while sister B was in Okoko. B has some pictures which was taken with A's phone and she wants it to be sent to her via Bluetooth (then bluetooth enabled phones was newly introduced). You got to see the way my sisters were wasting credit on phone calls to inform each other either that the pictures sent by B has not been received or to ask A if she has received the pictures sent. I happened to be their technical support person lol I kept calling them both to teach them how to configure their bluetooth settings (as if I know anything lol). This is how we spend our whole day trying to send pictures from jerusalem to jericho via bluetooth in vein. At the end of the day, each of us spent at least N1,500 MTN recharge on the yeye photo transaction lol.

    Abey

    ReplyDelete
  4. Read it yoursel n tell me if you laughed.....rubbish 😩😩😩😩

    ReplyDelete
  5. Distasteful gists... Would be back to read other gists

    ReplyDelete
  6. Always be urself. There is lady where I lived. She was lik a house assistant/keeper. she made us believe she went thru secondary education little did we know she cldnt read nor right except for her name. Weneva we are in church & a bible passage is called in d new testament u see her flipping thru d old testament. She usually says lik me see d book which she uses to open d passage dat was called and pretends to be reading. This has bin d routine every sunday until one unfaithful morning, lol. Durin devotion, she was asked to read d bible text for dat day. Lord have mercy, dis gal kept flippin thru d bible until she was assisted to open to d book. Lo & behold, she was staring at d passage. Everybody was puzzled. Caro, read na, no response. Her eyes began to get heavy with tears. Wat is it, I no sabi read. Na so everybody shout eh eh!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Right or write ma?



      #Vikenx-Virus

      Delete
    2. You yourself can't write well.. read your write up

      Delete
  7. i remember when i was young..my brother nd i came back from school(primary) my mum washing clothes... my brother nd i lied that there was no school d next day.. my mum said thank God.. she didnt wash our uniform again..we were so happy..later d in evening d school bus driver nd wife came to fetch water at our house..my mum ask am.. i hear say school no dey tomorrow.. the man shock..he asked my mum who told her my mum said it was my brother nd i..if u see d kind of beating we received that day..i still don't forget it.

    ReplyDelete
  8. another one. when i was young..i was with my immediate younger sis...so i saw one snail nd broke it . my dad came out nd asked who broke d snail..i was afraid to say i was d one. my dad asked again i deny am..he asked my sis she said she wasn't d one.hmmn d thing enter big Case..he asked me again i say maka chukwu no be me..my sis later agreed that she was d one..i was surprised/happy the same time..my dad took my sis to the room nd flogged her for not admitting she was the one on time.. after he finished flogging her..my aunty that was living in the same compound came nd saw her crying. she asked my mum what happened..my mum told her. .she said that can't be..that i was d one she saw breaking d snails...omoh..ekwensu boro m ike that day..both my dad ooo my mum ooo if u see d lashes i got eeh

    ReplyDelete
  9. another one. when i was young..i was with my immediate younger sis...so i saw one snail nd broke it . my dad came out nd asked who broke d snail..i was afraid to say i was d one. my dad asked again i deny am..he asked my sis she said she wasn't d one.hmmn d thing enter big Case..he asked me again i say maka chukwu no be me..my sis later agreed that she was d one..i was surprised/happy the same time..my dad took my sis to the room nd flogged her for not admitting she was the one on time.. after he finished flogging her..my aunty that was living in the same compound came nd saw her crying. she asked my mum what happened..my mum told her. .she said that can't be..that i was d one she saw breaking d snails...omoh..ekwensu boro m ike that day..both my dad ooo my mum ooo if u see d lashes i got eeh

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Are you all right? What's our business with all the snails you broke

      Delete

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