Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle of Blog Visitor Narratives..

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Friday, 16 September 2016

Chronicle of Blog Visitor Narratives..

Chronicles don land oh...lol





NARRATIVE NUMBER ONE
A DIFFERENT KIND OF PERSON.

Good day Stella and fellow bvns. I have something that is kind of bothering me, I don't know if I should be worried or some people are just designed the way I am.

I don't like partying, I don't like drinking, I don't like sex. Its actually the sex part that bothers me a bit. I thought getting a head will help, but it didn't. I'm highly unromantic. I can stay celibate for ages. 

I feel horny once in ages. My dislike for sex is a bit to the extreme that I sometimes avoid seeing le boo just because I don't want to have sex. I just love to kiss and cuddle and prolly foreplay.

My fear now is when I get married. I usually see sex as a chore not as sth pleasurable. It sometimes causes a little argument with le boo because he feels I should want it if I really love him.

Nobody has succeeded in making me like sex. I don't even know how to play with a man's cassava if he doesn't put my hand there or even ordinary nipples.
I have never been raped or gotten an unwanted pregnancy that lead to abortion so I don't think its psychological.
Should I be worried? Can a married man stay without sex? How do I improve sexually or romantically?
Thanks for your responses in advance and sorry for the epistle.


The guilt of pre-marital sex can also mess up your emotions,I hope you know this as well?your mind and body hates what you are doing and thats its way of trying to stop you..listen to it.
I might be wrong oh...lol


............................................................................................................


NARRATIVE NUMBER TWO
WHEN A TEEN REVOLTS.


Good day Stella,please I need your advice and that of bvs. 

  I have a sister who is 14 years old. She will be entering SS1 when school resumes. She has a phone,but doesn't go out with the phone ( mum bought it for her) the reason the phone was bought for her was for ease of communication and for sending her on errands because mum is a busy type,also she uses the phone for her assignments,she also gets updated through the phone.

 Now,she opened a facebook  account by herself,she has become a facebook addict,she always chat on facebook 247.I have called her and gave her an elderly advice,she agreed and thanked me but never stopped.   Recently,she has started welcoming her male friends in our house .

l am not always at home,l got a small job that keeps me busy as l await for my service probably by march next year. There was a rainy day,l came downstairs and found them( she and her male friend) playing under the rain,l watched them through the window they were playing so innocently,l called them and stopped them.             

Please, my questions are :is 14 years old girl free to do things on her own since the world is civilised now? Should we collect the phone from her? But the phone is v. essential for errands(especially to my mum) or is it better we collect it and buy her a Nokia Torch phone? What about her assignments? 

For her visitors,we have stopped her from receiving visitors both male and female friends and since that time she has been moody,she sees me as a wicked sister who doesn't want her to socialise,we are just two girls in our house others are guys. 

Please Stella,your red pen is highly needed. My fellow bvs,your advice will go a long way too...Thanks


As i read this,i saw myself growing up and everyone trying to tame me by force.The result was that everything they tried to stop me from doing i revolted silently.Except have sex,i did everything all what i was ASKED NOT TO DO and frustrated everyone around me.

So my advice is that you becomes friends with her,take her out,get lovingly involved in her world and you will see changes and hear her tell you things .

Some kind of discipline doesnt work with some teens,you need to be smart about this,dont get your mum involved in trying to befriend her.

good luck.

124 comments:

stunning slim shady said...

Kronicles ti de........... Space for comment booked.


Brb

calabar Chick said...

Lol @ play with cassava.
Poster pls u have to like it o...
When you get married, love making will definitely be part of what would spice up your marriage.

STARRY LARRY said...

@Poster 1 pray

@Poster 2, pray for her




*Larry was here*

Anonymous said...

I think I believe you , Stella. cos that is my story. my ex used to say I might be a lesbian cos I dont even know how to touch. It should be the pre marital sex thingy cos I always wanted to get married a v". Every-time i had to even kiss made me sad.

Doppelgรคnger said...

Poster 1 stop having premarital sex, try again when you're married and see if you won't enjoy it.
Better still, stop thinking about it too much. Your expectations are probably high reason you don't get satisfaction or pleasure from it. It us always on your mind, that is no way to enjoy anything.


Poster 2 well number 1 mistake was getting her an Internet enabled phone. I didn't get a phone till I graduated high school. They knew it will be a distraction.
Just take to her, there is no need to be aggressive in your approach. You can even agree on a schedule for her on when she should be online, since she doesn't take the phone out yet. By the way, who buys her data? You should probably limit it too. Get little data for her and don't always recharge or top up whenever it finishes.

Chikito The Professional Runs Girl said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Chikito The Professional Runs Girl said...

I don't see anything g wrong in what your teenage sister is doing. We should learn to trust and understand that some teenagers actually have a Good head on their neck. See, being over protective doesn't work. Call her. Sit her down. Give her sex education. Warn her about the dangers of social media. And encourage her to be open to you by telling you all her experiences. That way, she'll trust that you won't judge her and she will feel safe with you. You can't tame a modern child oh! So just keep communication lines very open.
Till today there are some conversations I can't have with my mum at my age, cos of this over protective nature. Now she says I'm secretive. But when she was closing those doors she dint know. 'Don't do this' 'don't do that'. Oya Na! We only discuss church and family issues. Simple

stunning slim shady said...

Poster 2: asides from d elderly voice u have given her I think u need to draw her attention to real life experiences on d negative outcome of mingling wt strangers via Facebook n even inviting dem to d house,; she kud be kidnapped or raped or even killed. Link her to d stories of late Cynthia Osukogu n odas who lost dia lives cos of facebook relationship. . .

I am the queen and the boss of this blog said...

Poster 1,
Truth is that you are a lesbian!...
Forget guys and go for girls...every woman most not get married BUT if you really want to settle down,marry a gay!,..

Poster 2,
How can your mom buy an internet enabled phone for someone her age?...
You people have spoilt this girl...
Can't she write assignment without a phone?...when you were her age,did you use internet to write your own assignment?...
Abeg collect the phone from her and give her a Nokia torch!...

Anonymous said...

Hebrew 13:4 4 Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.

Beloved, you will enjoy sex in marriage. The problem is when you begin to have sexual immorality; sex outside of marriage (between a man and woman); the guilt, the uncertainty (pregnancy, sti etc.) and the mere fact that you are disobeying God's injunction robs you of the joy and fulfillment and responsibility attached to "real love-making".

Anonymous said...

Poster 1 we're in it together. I see sex as an obligation. DH is getting fed up..no matter the foreplay,I don't get turned on. After a while,I'll just direct his thing to my own and bear till he comes. I married a virgin Stella.never had sex,just small kissing and foreplay with my now hubby. I was never molested. I've sought help medically or otherwise. DH even initiated porn to see if it'll help. We fuck very well after watching porn,but immediately after,the hatred for sex increases. We have sex like once in months.I'm tired jare.all acts of sex irritates me.

Becky Divine said...

1) I think its psychological
You need to see a shrink
But if you dont want that, then find a man like you. The kind that hates sex like you but that will not be easy oo. Good luck


2) Collect the phone and get her a small Nokia phone
Draw closer to her and monitor her! Don't take your focus away from her or you'll lose her.
Cos it's at this her age that juvenile delinquency is bad. But make sure you don't overdo the protection thing, give her a little room to breathe

Hope you guys have had 'The Talk' with her? Odi oke mkpa

ukwu dimond said...

poster one go and marry then we can advice you, for now am not sure what you are saying is for real cos you are stealing sex.

PLATINUM said...

Poster one about not liking sex maybe stella is right. Maybe.
Poster two be nicer to her, wen i was younger i used to tell pple that my mum wasnt my mum because she was always on my case, trying to get me to be a better person bt to me ehn she was wicked! I didnt see the wisdom she was trying to impact in me. Now that im older we r inseparable. Any correction you give or advise do it with love and continue to remind her u trust her and that u believe she will turn out right to mk ur parents proud. If she wants to do something wrong, she will remember this and obulu nwa ma ife, she wouldn't want to break that trust. And anytime she goes wrong jst calmly call her name and tell her that she disappointed you!. Children, or should i say that pple dont like hearing from anyone the love and respect that they hv done something to disappoint them.

cakes by Bella's, Abuja. 58DA8ADF, 07080305132, instagram @cakes_by_bellas ,twitter @CBellaabuja said...

Poster 1... hmm, maybe when u fund someone u truly love and ger married, the zeal will come.
Poster 2, try to get closer to her, you'll be surprised she'll open up. Maybe she is revolting coz there is no one to talk to as u and your mom are the bust type.

cakes by Bella's, Abuja. 58DA8ADF, 07080305132, instagram @cakes_by_bellas ,twitter @CBellaabuja said...

Busy *

Loveme Jeje said...

Poster 1... Go and be a reverend sister. Reverend sister dont feel anything, only praying. So help this country by praying. It is well with you.

Poster 2... It is their time and they rebel pass fanatics. Just do as Stella say. Check her well before you write another chronicle that she is pregnant.

ukwu dimond said...

poster two Stella has said it all, wish you all the best.

stunning slim shady said...

Poster one: how old are u? Wot do u do for a living? If u r still a teenager and in secondary school I wud advice u to face ur studies. When its time for marriage, pray so dat d Lord wud give u someone u r compatible with; someone who wud have sex say once or twice a year with u. For now fornication is a sin n Sex no b food n we all can't be wired d same way sexually but if u end up in marriage with somone who eats n breathes sex na to go see a SEXtherapist. BTW why do u call ur leboo's kini 'cassava',he must b very small down dere. #myopinion


Am out.

Sexy Ebony said...

Poster one I can know that feelings,it is the fear of pre marital sex that Is the cause of what is happening to you,dnt really have much to say but we wait for other comment.
Poster 2,I agree in taking the phone from her and giving her a Nokia touch ,but preventing her female frnds from visiting her is what I dnt agree on,for now she is too young for a male friend to come visit her.
For her assignmenr she has text books she can get her reference and information from for the time being ,she is just in ss1 now,so no much .cause going to Fb to chat 247,she is too young for DAT,and whatever she sees there,she will want to practice it,Fb is too inviting this days for a growing child.

kannie said...

Poster 1 Stella hit the nail right on the head "The guilt of pre-marital sex can also mess up your emotions". I also feel like this all the time. I don't have sex at all and I know it's because the guilt would eat me alive. Listen to it and aviod sex till marriage and u might enjoy it after marriage

Anonymous said...

Poster 1 it happens to me too, I'm 38 and have never reached orgasm with a man, I used to bother thinking I've not met the right one, but at 38, no. So it doesn't bother me again cos I'm even privileged, channel my energy into other things and I'm really really successful, I can stay for years without sex. who sex epp? Mtchww

white Berry said...

Narrative one: Just pray to God about it because one day you will definitely get married and sex is important in a marriage so you can bear your own fruits.
Narrative two: you people should ease the phone from her and get her a nokia phone just for the calls in case there is an errand. Then for er assignments, let her be using ur phone for it in that way she can't log out from u fb to chat with friends. You are not a wicked sis, she will thank you later, you are only guiding her on the right path in life to take.

Anonymous said...

Poster1: there are ppl like u, yet happily married, just dont bother ur husband if hes cheating, infact some men will love u cus they can cheat and ud knw about it and not talk cus u dislike sex... pray to find that kind of man, ur life will be rosy

Poster2, a straight hard prick will reset her brain to factory setting, make she no wry..... no amount of talk will help that girl, na the person wey introduce android gv am i de blame.

Anonymous said...

doing a good job Stella, keep it up

Anonymous said...

Poster 2 u re doing not bad @ all. Don't mind stella. By d tym she get belle she wil say y didn't her parent monitor her? Kip doin wat u doin

Alabi Ganiyat said...

Poster 2: Follow Stella advice...

Robyna Fenty said...

Poster 1: I can relate. I don't mind my company. I can be in my house for weeks on end. Not like I hate clubs, partying and drinking but I am nonchalant about it. I don't get the fuss.I just lazy to get dolled up and have a good time. As for the sex part, I realised it was my guilty conscience, I was so sure I was doing something bad that my brain never let me relax enough to enjoy it. The end results was excruiting pain as opposed to pleasure. I am better now, even tho it's not as awesome as they described it in mills and boom lol. It doesn't feel like I am being stabbed down there anymore. I feel that when I get married and start having guilt free sex it will change totally.
Poster 2: welcome to the 21st century. You are lucky she started at 14 alot start earlier. Facebook is still shacking her. Over time it will reduce. You just need to put an eye on her. Most importantly it's time to give her "The talk". Sister to sister. Or let your mother do it. Let her know what happens when teenagers have unprotected sex and that isn't ready for the consequences of sex. Remind her that the only thing a guy will want from her is sex. Punishing her will only push her away and into the arms of one grown uncle in your area or on Facebook who is telling her that she's a grown woman as opposed to you calling her a small girl everyday.

Candid Naija said...

Poster1 you are a lesbian, you prolly dont know it yet.
Poster 2 did u do assignment with smart phone in primary 6/jss1?
If she must have phone, get her a nokia torch phone, no time to sugar coat this cos the world is wicked with all the animals all over the internet.
Again, its a distraction,
Btw y is a 14 year old still entering JS 1?
Or did you mean SS 1?

Sandra Unachukwu said...

When you tell teenagers "don't do this", they go ahead and do it plus extra. Like Stella said, be her friend. But me mehn, dem no born me well to bring male friend com house back then oo. Dunno why she thinks its okay. Poster 2, u will end up needing aphrodisiacs and all those pills, because your case beyond help.

Anonymous said...

Scratches tohtoh

onyii Asa said...

Blog Analyser: poster one, it has to do with your upbringing. Relax and be free. I was like you untill I met my hubby and fell in love. I became as free as a bird and I began to love nd enjoy sex.infact mine was so bad that I couldn't even mention or call stuffs that has to do with sex. It is a process relax and be free. Poster two; she is in a delicate stage, she needs subtle guildiance. Tell her stories abt the dangers of social media. Tell her stories. Let her learn tru your stories. Don't stop her from having male friends.

Anonymous said...

Poster 1 ,it's. Your mind telling. You that what u r doing is wrong ๐Ÿ‘Ž. Wait until you get married ๐Ÿ’‘ you go love ❤ sex like kilode.

Ofili Success said...

Poster 2:Friendship and Sisterly love from you will go a long way to educate your Sis...............Just My Two Cent.

White Diamond said...

Poster one: Yeah, it's probably psychological. Do you believe in pre marital sex? If you don't, and you keep doing it, that's probably the reason why you don't enjoy it.

Poster two: My younger sister is my complete opposite. Except for looks and complexion. I'm crazy-when-you-get-to-know-me...lmao and introverted, she's the fun, outgoing, friend making type. Growing up, I tried curtailing her excesses the big sister way, by shouting and making threats, but it only made her secretive.I had to rethink, and then gently and with love, I taught her good from bad. Not that she was wild, but she was very trusting and naive, and people always want to take advantage of people like that. Thankfully, I was able to reel her in, before she made any mistakes. Today we're like a two way twist.

The only thing that'll work is teaching her about life. Not being a judge and jury. Don't hide stuff from her. She should know that the world is evil. Give her sex education too, but also tell her the benefits of being a mermaid. Then let her be. Goodluck.

#WhiteDiamondOut

Isi beke said...

Yeah! Stella is so so right, be friends with her and see how it goes

BAEbeez BAE said...

its obvious you dont like dicks,how can u be so stiff to sex aru odi kwa gi?probably you are more attracted to same sex and you are scared to say it.similar story a friend of mine came drumming to us ,not until i snooped and found out she was phucking a girl!but everybody will b looking innocent lol.pls you have to reset your mind psychologically,because its something you must get down with.learn to be romantic,i dont believe you are so dry in bed,watch movies ,sex clips and learn.unless you want to remain a gwegwelina ,afa gi bu kwa sorry

Anonymous said...

Poster 1 sounded like me ooo. That's just me for you. I would rather prefer kisses and cuddlings to sex. The only difference btw u and i is that i love to play with le boo's cassava o, but the moment it wakes up and he get's ready for show, i would simply laugh and run away.
I think Stella is right though. It's a thing of the mind because i think your body and soul doesnt like what you are doing since it's fornication and might lead to unwanted pregnancy or even stds.

margaret udo said...

Poster two..I'll say, she will start hiding everything.. After all she's in school and may go to places from school..I'll advice you become friendly with her and be more of a friend than sister, then she will gradually open up, then you try to read her chats and when you see any sex related things.. You sit her down, tell her things she needs to know and get her to promise you and God that she'll wait till she becomes and adult..she needs to see why women are successful, because they focus more on building a career than any other thing..Time will come she'll have and do anything she wants but for now she needs to be shown pictures of the girl who had waec best result, Nigerian girls being accepted into foreign universities at the teenage ages..you don't regret it and finally try and ask her dream and what she wants to be in future

Anonymous said...

Poster one were you circumcised?
Poster two take Stella's advise

PORTABLE VIV the beautiful n sexy queen of sdk blog said...

I'm on holiday.....
I need cream n cookies jare
Side eyes*

Anonymous said...

My mum actually thinks i'm still a virgin not knowing i have eaten the forbidden fruit long time ago. Most times, i endulge in sex just to please my lover and make him stay, and not as if i enjoy sex. And should i manage to give in, 5 minuites sex is a no for me. 2-3 minuites is ok for me, u wan drill borehole for there? Guilty concsience won't just let me enjoy sex. Poster 1, Stella is actually right so the ball is in your court.

Anonymous said...

1. I am having same issues. The difference is that i am married to a Pastor. The marriage is 3yrs old and we are TTC. I simply hate sex! To me its an unpleasant task i just have to handle. I'd be reading comments cause i need answers too.

Candid Naija said...

Sorry o, i thought i saw Jss, my eyes just dey mess me up, either ways, my advice remain the same

redbotafly said...

Poster 1 run to d convent dts where u belong.poster 2 u dnt need to collect d phone frm her,be her friend n give advice.sometimes go down to her level dt way she wil be free wit u n u wil get thru to her beta n possibly manage her fb acc.

Jenny zee said...

Poster2, talk to her like a friend nd give her back d fone, make sure u know d password of d fone nd read through her chats once in a while

Bountiful ajebo said...

Poser 1,we should be friends.
Sometimes I imagine myself ending up a spinster(Godforbid)...I honestly don't know what's wrong with me.

Anonymous said...

Aunty are u married?

stephan said...

Stop premarital sex 'twill save you the guilt which is draining you psychologically.

Anonymous said...

Hey, Ist poster. I'm js like u. I don't fancy sex. Its only hubby I HV had sex my entire life. I use to like foreplay buh since I Hd kids,I don't even let hubby touch my boobs, no go area. Though he stl touches it for his own pleasure I guess.
I only initiate sex wen I'm trying to get pregnant. Buh I won't be doing DAT anylonger, I HV all I want by God's grace.Hubby even tot I was circumsized buh my mum sed no and besides I'm stl in my mid 20s so I am sure I wasn't.

To my solution, he likes sex, so we HV it everyoda day as a routine. At least DAT removes d pressure of feeling bad for Neva initiating sex. I know its one of my important responsibilities. Wen I know we didn't do it as planned in DAT week, he goes all d days, "to mk up for missed action". Dats it for me.
We joke I WL probably be into sex in my 30s and he WL dwindle den in his 40s.
Good thing he likes my body, I'm skinny and he could try diff positions wtout flinching. He loves looking at my body during sex.

PS; I could smooch for Africa in my boyfriend days wt my diff boyfriends. Buh no one past my waistline. I wasn't even ever considering it.
If he understands, dats d least of ur problems in marriage. I'm hoping he doesn't cheat on me. I snoop and he snoops on my fone too, DAT I know. If I catch him, well hmmmmm, Godforbid sha, lemme not go dere.

Amy A said...

Poster 1 It happens to me too. I'm 24 married as a virgin yet I'm not interested in sex. I only do it because it's my duty tho hubby doesn't force me. I was circumcised and my clit is almost non existent

tracy James said...

Lol....foooooool

Anonymous said...

Welcome to my world. I can go without sex for months and gets irritated anytime DH wants action. I have never enjoyed sex with anyone, before nor after marriage

Mama Afrika said...

p1 get married first before worrying about your sex life. pray about it too, nothing is too silly to talk to God about.
p2 your sis is suffering from teenage syndrome. she will outgrow it dont worry.

Abaraonye Nonye said...

Poster 1: You should be grateful that you have a working conscience unlike so many peoples own has been seared. You are not strange at all in any way just continue in being yourself and don't change anything...

Poster 2: My Dear If that was the way you were 'choked' then I don't think you will even be on SDK.. Try to understand her, she is a teenager. You need to explain her why she shouldn't do certain things, she aint a baby no more. She is undergoing a transition into adulthood. try to understand and sometimes give her the benefit of doubt. My ex told me something ''If you are rigid, you break easily but when you are able to bend a lil, you hardly have cracks'' Please talk it easy on her..Inugo. Yes you can take away the phone from her, it is really a distraction...

Anonymous said...

Stella is very right at poster 1. Poster 2 I once met a teenager at Heathrow airport,she was coming to Nigeria for holiday and was on the phone for sometime and when she finished her call I looked at her direction and noticed her phone was Nokia touch,so I really don't understand what a 14year old would be doing with an internet enabled phone,na una sabi,civilization will destroy Africa faster than anything.

Anonymous said...

poster one, go fuck yourself. or go for deliverance or change ur bf. maybe u don't love him that much or he is ugly, his face is scaring you
poster two. honestly I got an angry while reading this. like wtf!!! pls leave her along and stop caging her. I'm sure you were worse wen you were a teenager too and you learnt your lessons d hard way. but instead of you to lecture her and use urself as an example, you decided to let down ur frustration on her right? continue o. aunty gwegwe. At times,kids needs their own freedom. the more you cage her, the more rigid she becomes. we are in d 21st century not 15th century. I don't advise pple to be too hard on kids. a little advise would do. don't think you are better than her cos you are older. I'm sure you are a repentant runs girl and u don't want ur sis to be like you.
you saw her playing with a guy innocently in d rain. were they fucking or fondling each oda? instead of to mind ur biz and look for a husband to marry, you Don turn monitoring spirit. what's your biz if she has a phone and she is in Fb 247? why are u so bitter? is that your biz? I'm sure you are d jealous type. enemy of progress. you are thinking your sis might have a bf before you. she is just 14. instead of u to be close to her so she can be close to you or probably hook u up with guys, you are forming detective. sorry but pple like u never move forward in life. maturity is not by age. the fact that she is 14 doesn't make her foolish or naive. when I was 14 I was very wise. I nor get belle

Anonymous said...

So,Cassava is small to you???? Wow.

Mama Afrika said...

circumcised? who circumcises a lady?? Or is this a typo. . .

Anonymous said...

poster one, go fuck yourself. or go for deliverance or change ur bf. maybe u don't love him that much or he is ugly, his face is scaring you
poster two. honestly I got an angry while reading this. like wtf!!! pls leave her along and stop caging her. I'm sure you were worse wen you were a teenager too and you learnt your lessons d hard way. but instead of you to lecture her and use urself as an example, you decided to let down ur frustration on her right? continue o. aunty gwegwe. At times,kids needs their own freedom. the more you cage her, the more rigid she becomes. we are in d 21st century not 15th century. I don't advise pple to be too hard on kids. a little advise would do. don't think you are better than her cos you are older. I'm sure you are a repentant runs girl and u don't want ur sis to be like you.
you saw her playing with a guy innocently in d rain. were they fucking or fondling each oda? instead of to mind ur biz and look for a husband to marry, you Don turn monitoring spirit. what's your biz if she has a phone and she is in Fb 247? why are u so bitter? is that your biz? I'm sure you are d jealous type. enemy of progress. you are thinking your sis might have a bf before you. she is just 14. instead of u to be close to her so she can be close to you or probably hook u up with guys, you are forming detective. sorry but pple like u never move forward in life. maturity is not by age. the fact that she is 14 doesn't make her foolish or naive. when I was 14 I was very wise.

Anonymous said...

Thought u were just 19? This world is really coming to an end!

Baby Oku said...

Poster 2, u can't tame a gal that is in puberty in this civilised time. Stopping those male frnds from coming around means, she will rather go to their houses (That is nt wat u want either).

It's better u try to knw her frnds and also be her frnd not a sister. Many teens prefer a frnd to talk to and understand them, than a sibling that will see wrong in all they do. Bring her close to u and talk to her as a frnd. Create an avenue where She can be free and easy to talk to u about anything, that way u can also gist her about the dangers of having guys around her.

Stop trying to be a big Sister, she will only run away from you and run into the arms of another person who she feels understands her and her hormones. Be a friend rather and make it in a way that she can always tell u when a guy starts telling her what she's nt suppose to hear or do. And u, tell her these things before hand, so she's aware.

Changing her phone will make her run to a frnd so she can use the frnd's phone. Dnt chase ur sister away from u at a tender age. Dnt make her do things in secrets, u won't be able to stand that.

Cindy said...

I think that's one of the reasons d bible is against it, so u don't get yourself worried over something u shouldn't be enjoying. Poster 2, I think u Should get her the torchlight phone.what are the needs for text books any way? Let her borrow your phone if she must use the internet. My 2cent sha

Anonymous said...

Same here,3 years still ttc but I don't like sex see it as a great task don't know what to do...

Paragon7ven. said...

Psychologically, the teenage years up to young adulthood of about 25 years is the most complicated and stressful years in a child's life. This is the period when they spend most of their lives undergoing different forms of training most especially schooling. It is the period when they begin to experience some varying degrees of biological (hormonal) changes. It's the period they begin to find who they really are.
The desire for a friend for the purpose of emotional attachment is almost inevitable. They want to mingle, play around, go out, begin to dress and imitate their older siblings if they have one or someone they see as a model. All this is usually a process, a gradual transition into adulthood.
The best things that could be done for them at this point to curtail their excesses is not to try to cage them but to constantly educate and educate them about sex, relationships, negative things that come with unprotected sex and unwanted pregnancy. Make it a habit to constantly talk to them without judgement. Some times keep your opinions to your self because they don't need it, they only need someone to talk to. Once you have gotten to that stage when your children can tell anything including the person next-door who has been sending him or her love poem and text messages, then you no longer have a problem.
GOD BLESS NIGERIAN.

Anonymous said...

She's more house help in their house. No one plays specialises they only scrutinise her. Ughhh b her friend and loving

Anonymous said...

stella you are very right on poster 1. like me i love sex wella, but i find out that i get guilty anytime i have it. so i kuku stop, i have been celibate for almost 2 yrs now. i be babe o and its the lord's doing

Anonymous said...

I also thought i was circumsized not until when i started snapping pics of my vj and comparing it with google pics. I even used style to ask my mum if i was circumcized and the answer was no. So you see, you don't have to be circumcized before you dislike sex because it's actually a thing of the mind.

Anonymous said...

http://Youthnize.com/?ref=87461

Vivilicious said...

Poster 2 I'll advise you not to stop her from bringing her friends home cos if you do, she'll go and visit them, then you won't even be aware of what would go on there. Rather, encourage her to bring her friends home, so you can know the kind of ppl she hangs out with, that way, you'll b able to advise her on the kind of friends to keep. Your sis is an extrovert and trying to cage her will do more harm than good. Keep advising her and try to get her to Trust you, so she would find it easy to open up to you. Don't stop her from having friends cos some friends can even be beneficial to her life, rather monitor the kind of friends she keeps.

Anonymous said...

When he starts getting it outside in full dose, don't cry, get eve's desire and ur libido will improve.

Jasmine said...

Poster 1: there is nothing wrong with u. I know someone that behaves like u and she's not bothered about it. Relax.

Poster 2: that's how they behave o. U correct them and u become a devil. Let her be moody. Turn blind and deaf to her face and mood. It's for her own good. Sometimes when they refuse to take advise, use force.

Vivilicious said...

Queen queen. I always look forward to your advise. Poster 1, take this advise ๐Ÿ‘† at your own peril.

Vivilicious said...

Its psychological. You need to change your mindset.

Anonymous said...

Chikito u just read my mind ho ha! With teenagers these days one has to be careful cus u might scare them away from confiding in u. I remember when I was a teenager, my parents were very strict with us especially my mum. She can flog/yell for Africa Tho is wasnt the phone era buh
They were strict and over protective. We never went out to play with neighbours or kids in the area. We dont visit friends, friends were scared to visit. We never even got sexually educated! I can still remember how my mum used to threaten us using words like she would skin us alive, she would lock us up in police station so dey beats us to a pulp (I ve seen her do dat to her kid bro nd sis bfor when we were still little), She wud say if I ever got preggy or contracted HIV dat she would put fire on my neck and burn me to ashes. And so many scary things. All that brought fear into me dat I never bcame frnds with her. I only loved and respected her like I ought to. I dint evn tell her when I strt menstrating! She got to knw abt two yrs after when my cousin nd I were arguing nd she busted me. My mum felt bad cus she felt I dint confide in her even tho she kept asking if I had started cus she was getting worried and I kept say no. Till I got into d uni, graduated and served, I never brought any guy home or introduced her to any of my bfs..it was when I was about getting married she knew my bf..in all my mum is the kindest person I know. Funny, jovial, a super extrovert and a very good counsellor too. till date she still accuses me of being secretive, not telling her about my problems, not trusting her enough to confide in her, not being best friends with her etc. Its not like I do it on purpose. But bcus I never saw her as my friend from the beginning. I love her to bits buh not just close to her as she or I would want. So parents should be very careful. Especially the mothers.

Anonymous said...

This is how u would destroy your home with your hands and later cry foul. You call men wicked but this ur act of making sex unbearable for ur DH will make him look outside, pastor or not.

Baby Oku said...

Limit data kwa.. schedule her on when to be online.. Hahahahahahaha.. this is soo a bad move. Do u realise she has frnds she can always run to to use their phones?. She can also get data for herslf.. am sure she gets pocket money for school or from running errands, she can always sneak and get herslf data.

Poster like I said above, be a frnd to her, b so close to her that when u return from work, u can always borrow her phone and check her msgs and wall and even the guys she chats with so u know wat to advise her against. Dnt try to prevent her from going on facebook, she will go and open another account without u knowledge(dats n what u want).

Greenland said...

Poster 1, get married first. If you still don't like sex, send in another chronicle. For now, you have no business having sex(premarital).
Poster 2, pls take Stella's advice.

Anonymous said...

My 8 year old have Internet enabled phone. I took down the browsers. The WhatsApp is intact. He uses it chat with his siblings.

PL THE GREAT said...

Biko, someone should bundle linda eze to mfm. Asap! The kain advice wey you dey give ehn.... Jehovah bu eze.

PL THE GREAT said...

Biko, someone should bundle linda eze to mfm. Asap! The kain advice wey you dey give ehn.... Jehovah bu eze.

Chummy cho cho said...

Thank you Anonymous 16:10.. Buy her a smaller phone that is not internet enabled. Its too early for her to be addicted to social media. She can borrow ur phone when she has assignment.

Believe me making phones available to teens at an early age is not the best. I have a teen with me and its the moment we got her a phone she started having boyfriends and all.. Make her ur friend oo, but shield her as much as you can.

Anonymous said...

Aunty it's not the same curriculum that was used then, that is used now.. Times have changed and things are evolving... I'm a teacher and I teach my learners about ozone layer,Kyoto protocol (8th graders) and this you couldn't even pronounce when you are their age *thats if you can now sef* so kids need to research!!!

Darling take it from a teacher the only way she will tell you anything if she trusts you, build a stern but friendly relationship with her, let her feel safe around you, if not you have a disaster about to happen.... My learners will rather tell me how they were raped and thinking of sleeping with their bfs than tell anyone in their homes. Just imagine if I am evil I will definitely lead them in the wrong path..so it's better if their confidant is a loved one.

Poster 2: why don't your try natural aphrodisiacs and also maybe you should start drinking.. Wink wink.. I can be frigid sometimes too but a glass or 2 of wine relaxes me, maybe it can help you too.

vivychoco said...

Exactly vivilicuous u just said my mind. Poster 2 let her socialize

DonMayor said...

Poster two. Don't follow Stella's advice. Collect the phone from her and reprimand her completely. Don't even give her 3310 for replacement.
What nonsense.

Emilia Peter said...

Poster2 don't take the phone from her bcos she will still login with her frnds phone and like what I use to do is to talk to her about the good and bad things she should know.

Tush baby said...

Take it to God in prayers and always tell ur self that you like sex

Anonymous said...

I think its psychological. No matter how i hate sex, there are just two people i cant resist. I mean i get wet mere hearing their voice. I pray i end up with one of them as husband if not, forget sex for me.

Tush baby said...

Poster 1 it is natural for one to have low or high libido for ur own case i advice you to buy coconut, tiger nut and dait blend them together, sieve and drink it always it will help to increase ur hormones and make sure you marry a man you are sexually compatible with .

odeh paul said...

teens are very sensitive u shld b cls to ha...shes in ha puberty stage xo dey wil b lot of pressure frm d opp sex...nw is d tym 4 u to guide ha through d does nd dnt of relationship nd dnt tel nt to hav a boyfwnd...jst tel nt to bang..convince nd mak ha ur paddy xo dat she can open up to u at anytym..nd dnt collct d fone frm ha

Anonymous said...

Poster One, thought I was the person that sent this to Stella, have tried various means to at least like sex, but it's not working for me. Boo has tried alot and won't blame him if he cheats on me. I read how sex is amazing when with the right person but I love boo so much and put all my mind while at it but still same story. Decided to flirt with a toaster, after clubbing and enough highness, retire to the room and dis guy was so good wit his tongue and started enjoying the pleasure. When time for thrusting in reach, na so I push the guy one side and warned him never to touched me again. Saying he was speechless is an understatement. I still pray about it tho....

Mao Akuh said...

1. Just pray to get a man that's like you. Stopeet it.

2. You guys should replace her phone with normal LG or Nokia phone. Its not too early to correct it because she has a long way ahead. Unless your people are ready to see worse in the near future. My dear we live in an ungodly world and only those that trust in the Lord and do not follow the pattern of this world shall raise godly kids.

#FellowshipTime
#RunsAway

Vivilicious said...

Yes o, namesake.

Miss Ferragamo said...

Spot on paragon

Anonymous said...

Poster 1 I feel what you are going through, mine is the guilt of pre marital sex that is the cause. I am 31 and I have not had sex for three years now, i don't have a boyfriend cause I am scared he won't understand and wait till we are married for me to be comfortable with sex

Great Lady said...

Poster 1 you shouldn't be having sex outside marriage. When you have sex at the time God appointed it, you wouldn't feel bad about it. As Stella said, God put that hatred for sex, cos you aren't married yet. So please wait and if your boyfriend doesn't understand, move on from him.

Port Harcourt's Finest said...

Lol! Very sharp and ruthless advises. No dancing around the bush. The end of the epistle did it for me "When I was 14. I was very wise. I nor get belle. Hahahaha!
You get mouth sha.

cathy said...

I agree with you fenty, but if you don't try to enjoy sex now believe you me when you get married it will continue, take charge and try out new ways poster 1. You said it all to p2.

Anonymous said...

Poster 1 : try girls. Not to become a Lesbian but I hear it helps in discovering what turns you on sexually. Pls let no one come and drop shit under my comment o. Poster 2: leave that girl alone, you are her sister not her mother. Play the role of a rear big sister and you two will be fine

Bukki Femi said...

Answer d question pls

Souljagurl said...

Anon 17:05 "Weh don ouh"!

Madam Small chops said...

@ Poster 1:

There is nothing wrong with you, some people are not just crazy about sex.The Bible says not to deny your spouse his/her conjugal rights except for fasting purposes and both parties must be in agreement.So you see sex is very important in marriage.

Meanwhile if you marry someone that understands your plight and handles you well,you will be begging for MORE

Poster 2:

Stop putting ideas into the poor gurls mind.playing in the rain is one innocent act most gurls her age wont do.Am sure you want to protect her as a big sis,start by telling her the do's and don'ts.Its her choice to make at the long run.

Anonymous said...

Just wow! Lol. Heehe

Chikito The Professional Runs Girl said...

Anon my own wasn't that bad though. I wasnt allowed to ride a bicycle, climb trees, swim, normal stuff kids do. Girls guide was a sin. Cultural dance is devil worship, so dont join. The inly thing tbey tried to force us to do was play a musical instruments. We had two music teachers, drums, keyboard and guitar. But at in my teenage years, it got boring. I Just couldn't tell my mum boys are toasting me, in her head they've seen my paent. Or even go for parties as a teen. How? Lock up. Sex education was 'if a man touches you, you will be pregnant' ๐Ÿ˜‚ funny Enough,when I got into uni I partied ooooh. Till I was tired. Btwn calabar-lagos-abuja. Partying with my friends. I go come this same lagos them no go know say I dey town. So who lose? During hols they will still be saying: who is calling you? Don't come home after 7. But I was living in my own apartment on campus. Waste of time ๐Ÿ˜‚

Anonymous said...

Poster one,the not liking partying and drinking is normal for some eg me but the sexual aspect is highly unnatural.you might find it difficult to believe but your problem is psychological. You might not have been raped and all but maybe in the process of growing up,you had a wrong view of sex or maybe when you started developing sexual drive and perhaps you didn't want to dabble into premarital sex,you repressed tour urges rather than control it.nothing happens in a vaccum.something must HV caused ur aversion to sex and I'd advice you to think long and hard n be truthful to itself.sex is very essential to marriage.the is no good and solid marriage without sex.most importantly, ask God to help you.he will

Anonymous said...

People are different, because you love sex doesn't mean any other person who doesn't like it isn't normal, and its not about guilt of premarital sex. I am married, and I am just like the poster, I prefer foreplay, I hate penetration,in fact I beg my hubby to cum quickly most times. I don't cum through sex, hubby makes sure I cum during foreplay, so he just immediately start pounding once I've cum. Its been 3 years now, and we are good like that. And no, hubby doesn't cheat, my man is that disciplined.

Anonymous said...

1million likes for dis ur comment Don'. ๐Ÿ‘ Correct sombori

Desperate chick said...


my dear ur mum is jes the opposite of my Dad





#Enter your reply...

Anonymous said...

Poster 2. My father called me one day wen I was about dat age. He sat me down and told me about men. He said u are very beautiful no doubt but know dis that any guy who says he loves u now cannot and will not marry u now because u are still very young. He will sleep with u and move on to d next girl.and he asked me how many I was ready to sleep with before I get to the age of marriage? It was indeed a wake up call fr me because my shakara then was too much as per girl wey fine with the baddest hips ever.those words of his made me wait and today I have no regret. God bless my father!

beeolah said...

Poster 1, war room is ur friend when u get married.
Poster 2, give her coconut oil.

Anonymous said...

It could be hormonal. Do a hormone profile and find out.

Anonymous said...

Narrative 2:The best thing you can do for that girl is to become her friend. Let her be bringing her friends home so you get to know and gauge them. Buy her a Nokia touch and then a desktop computer for browsing, which can be monitored and controlled.

Desperate chick said...

i gree with u on this@Don mayor, in those days whn i was still in secondary school, my Dad can only get u a phone whn u r done with ur secondary school even at that, it must be a Nokia torch.





#Enter your comment...

Lilly simple said...

Waoooooo anno n Chikito nice

Anonymous said...

You are possessed. Go for deliverance asap

Anonymous said...

Mama Africa, are you an olodo or what?

Chikito The Professional Runs Girl said...

That's a very very good question oh. Poster 1 were you circumcised? If your clitoris is off you won't have a sexual pleasure when touched.

Chikito The Professional Runs Girl said...

As women, our clitoris expands and elongates as we get older. With leads to increased sexual urge and pleasure. So don't give up yet. Your 40s might be you steamy years.

Chikito The Professional Runs Girl said...

*Your steamy years

Anonymous said...

Poster 2...are you an idiot with rocks for brain? You wrote in a chronicle to ask whether to take away your sister's phone? Na wah oh

Anonymous said...

Anony 12:13 please stop being used by the devil. Her having premarital sex is the cause of all this. All she needs is to stop it and get herself educated in these matters. Gosh! Poster stop having sex first of all. Then ask yourself if you really love your intended, because prior to falling in love I could not imagine having sex at all, but being head over heels changed all that. So pls examine your feelings/relationship.

Anonymous said...

Must you cuss her..fool

Anonymous said...

Must you cuss her..fool

Anonymous said...

Exactly....I laff and run too

In fact once I mistakenly start to enjoy it,my brain resets and vjay closes...it becomes hard to continue and nothing can enter again..

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