Stella Dimoko Saturday In House Gists...


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Saturday, 24 September 2016

Saturday In House Gists...

Hopefully these gists Entertain you....
Please read my end note..


My fellow blog visitor,my own saturda‎y laugh has landed,and it goes has follows!!!sometimes years back, my mother a business woman,CAN STINGY FOR AFRICA,whenever asked for money she laments each passing day,that their wasn't sales @ shop,so we the children knew her with the words,NO SALES!!!but what we the children noticed but never realized was that whenever she comes home from shop each night,the first place she goes into,is the toilet with her handbag,not knowing the toilet was her own bank,where she saved her own money till day breaks!!she removes the top of the wc (the water closet  of toilet seat)and keeps the money she makes each day,before heading to the bank in the morning to deposit it,don't ask  me how possible is that,its so possible in the sense that we don't have water coming into our flat,so we do with mallam (aboki)fetching water for us,and pours it into the water can,we had in the toilet,so their wasn't used for the wc for flushing rather we made use of bucket to use to flush!!

My mama go remove the top of the wc put money for there and close am back,and then come out from the toilet and pretend has usual that their wasn't sales,but the day we catch am for the act,na the day my elder sister and I were fast asleep in our room in the middle of the night, only for my elder sister to jump up and started shouting fire oh,fire oh!the house is on fire!!!we all jumped up from sleep,thinking our building was on fire,not realizing that where she got the scream fire, was from the church in the next street,where a revival was taking place(where their told them to cast away the devil by screaming Fire)we all jumped out of bed,runningfrom our room to my parent room,to alert them of the building been on fire,and that we had to vacate the flat has soon has possible,we were all running to the door to open it,and leave our flat.

when we noticed our mother running into the toilet screaming my money ooooo,my money must not burn ooo,she ran into the toilet,and went straight to the wc,to get her money,the top of the wc came crashing down and broke into bits,because of the speed she went for the money,we all watched her with open eyes and was full of shock ,only for us to get downstairs our building,and realized that it was a FALSE ALARM!!we got back upstairs and tease her,so the toilet be your own savings account abi(MADAM NO SALES!!!trust her since that day,she stopped hiding her money in the toilet when she realized that her secret has been let out of the bag!!!ABEG MAKE UNA VOTE FOR ME Ooooo



I visited my brother's place for a short stay. So on Sunday morning,we
all prepared for church. We are to go for second mass. I jejenly wore
my flat shoes after dressing up,but my sister in law was like babe
this flat shoes won't bring out the beauty of your gown. She went to
her wardrobe and brought out this fine shoes,I don't even know how
many inches (I will attach the picture). Okay oh. I wore the shoe but
it was a bit tight for me because I am size 38 or 39, but she wears 37
or 38. My sensible mind was telling me to forget this shoe and wear my
flat shoes then my other mind was telling me "babe you need to rock
this opportunity " . Okay oh, finally I wore the shoe and I was like
since the distance from the house to the church is not that far,I can
manage.( like 10 minutes walk at most).

I was now like 5 minutes away from church ground.....tiiiiaaaaa omo
see gbege. I raised my leg and the shoe front sole gave away. .. I was
like " kaiiii I don enter" !
To make matter worse,the first mass just ended and people were
trooping out. I was there standing at the junction ( between habib
street and Arufa street), I didn't know if I should go back or
continue,but when I thought of how I will be limping to go and give
offering or to go and receive holy communion, I decided to go back. On
my way back, I   was hearing sneaky comments from people... one was
like " nne na by force to wear heels ? "another one was like " Negodu
ihe nwa rigoje ( see what this girl go climb!)
Another was like "na by force to grow tall"

I felt like the ground should open and swallow my shame that moment.

I didn't even bother going back to church.

When they came back from church, My sister in law was like" sis I
didn't see you at the church again., what happened ?

I only showed her the shoe cos I couldn't talk ... mehn see as she
tear laugh give me, like the one I received on the street wasn't



Good day Stellakork the onye ukwu sarambala 1 of SDK ville... U want
to tell a story.
There is this lecturerer in my department called Mr Okadigbo.
Okadigbo is a self acclaimed old soldier that tells stories a lot. He
can tell stories from the beginning of his period to the end without
teaching. We normally have his class on the 2nd floor of a very old 3
storey building that looks like it will collapse at any moment. Me I
normally sit close to the door incase of any incasity. LOL

So I went to class on wednesday after a very heavy rain. I almost
refused entering class due to the condition of the building coupled
with the fact that I was carrying out a research on the role of
obsolescence in the collapse of buildings but decided against it
because Okadigbo doesnt joke with his attendance.

I sha went in and sat on the seat closest to the door. Okadigbo came
 in in his usual manner and began...
' in 1759 when i worked is a cadet in the Nigerian army...' there was
a noise at the window, I looked up and saw sand falling. ShUuu... nor
be building dey collapse so? come see run! I was among the first to go
out as the baddest guy ever liveth that I is. Come see Okadigbo dey
drag the staircase with students. It wasnt funny at all. It was later
we discovered the cause of the commotion. Artisans were tiling an
office on the 3rd floor so they packed the broken cement floor and
threw it out the window!

Hahaha. Okadigbo has vowed not to enter our class again and he hasnt
even introduced hus course for the semester. Na die we dey

This is the end of my story



Good day everyone.Straight to the gist.This incidence happened
yesterday at the place we went for teachers'interview.The interview
kicked off with easy writing captioned*WHY I CHOSE TEACHINF AS A
CAREER*So we began writing immidiately because we were given a little
space of time to round up.Meanwhile there is this particular lady in
our group,(we were grouped according to qualifications)prior to the
interview,she had been gisting us of how she had gone to various
schools for interview.infact according to her she was looking for the
highest bidders.I was even looking for a means to get her number after
the interview so she can help me with the address of the schools
around the the town cos am new.

So back to the gist.As we were sitting
on the same desk writing the essay,the supervisor noticed that she
kept on asking me questions,he then spaced us and warned us against
any kind of interaction as long as the exam lasted.So after the
essay and oral interviews,(tho the oral  was done one by one),it was time
for dictation/micro teaching,that was where the whole drama began.

come and see real drama on the board those of us into teaching can atest to
how humilating micro teaching can be esp wen you lack the self esteem
and confidence.So it got to the turn of  this my wonderful teacher
that i planned making friend cos she knows so many schools,the real
drama began.first her 6inches h......

******Now let me address something here which i feel is wrong.
Maybe my mindset is different but the reason i started in house gists was for fun but along the line i decided to attach monetary award to it becos i just wanted to make it funnier.

I did not want to bring it here how rude most of the recipients of MY HARD EARNED money have been and how they do not even come back to say thank you.Some even insult me via email but i still give the money because my word is my bound.
The winner of last week's gist has officially pissed me off and i am closing this section to think of something else or nothing at all.
The supposed winner email bombed me commanding or ordering me to pay up the 10k naira....for Chrissakes 10k means nothing to me ,if you do not classify me amongst Millionaires,at least trust that i can afford 10k or more?

Most times i pay a week after win because i hate to do Banking stuff and i always explain to wait...which i mailed this person severally but whosai!!!

Maybe I am too unavailable?too friendly?...Maybe i should close all doors and just blog stories without caring?

I am done with explaining please.....You cannot come here and insult me and expect to get anything from here,that is the same reason i closed the free advert section inside IHN,If there is another blog that advertises for free and tolerates the ISH then i will be happy to direct you there.

I am not angry or upset but some things are unacceptable.

Lets move on..Enjoy today's gist.This is the last in house gists,any other funny gist that comes in will be posted inside IHN henceforth.



  1. About business women being stingy
    I disagree they like living flamboyant life.

  2. #When you do something out of love, you don't count the cost*

  3. stale gist @1 and 2..especially gist 2 copied

  4. Gist 1, I'm sure u are from yoruba ( no offence to my fellow country people), u kept using 'has' instead of 'as', to be sincere u would av used pidgin... Ur English is an apology. The story was ok though.

    1. Gist 1 was hilarious.Poorly written but funny all the same.

  5. Ahhh stella haff vex!
    We are loyal ma.

    1. Stella baby, no vex oh. Me that I am planing to send my own gist tomorrow. Why can't most people be patient Na wah sotey insult join am. Stella baby cool your temper bikonu. Kisses from here.

  6. You should be proclaimed a saint stellar! You're far too kind. I don't think I can deal.

  7. Please I need advice. It all started last 2months. I came back from work around 4 pm and my wife was not back yet, while my son was sleeping in his room. As walked in into the living room I saw our house help bending down cleaning the side stool. She was wearing a short gown without undies, mehn!! Her juicy pu**y was showing. I called her and asked her if she was aware that her gown was exposing her nakedness. She said no and apologized.the whole sight woke up my veins. As she was about to leave I looked into her eyes an noticed that she was feeling horny. I held her on the hand and drew her closer and kissed her her passionately and she said to me "sir I am feeling horny". Damn!!! She turned me on the more. I started kissing her neck, then straight to her firm boobs while fingering her, she was calling my name and saying sweet nonsense. After some couple of minutes I went straight down to eat her sweet pu**y, I took it step by step. I started licking the vulva then to the libia before I finally landed at the clitoris and inserted my index finger inside her vjay to stimulate her G-spot. At a point she wanted to blow and she climaxed 4 times while telling me "Baby you are the best" "I want your dick inside me" I now brought out my long firm dick to.....
    ..... To be continued

    1. Hahahahahahah...
      This sounds like those sexy stories in better lover magazine way back...

      This your lie ehhee can wake up the dead...

    2. Mscheeew,liar.No be only 'libia',Gadaffi nko? Nonsense!!

    3. ewww I dont believe you. If you wrote that you went straight to bang her okay, but kissing the neck and other romance?;abeg are you there to bang her or romance her? rubbish. next it will be dinner date.yes baby" lol.

    4. @Sassy you just killed me! I burst out laughing at your comment because that's the same thing I thought when I saw "libia" lmaoooooooo. "Gadaffi ko" 😂😂

  8. It's a pity. Some people though, smh.

  9. Gist 4 did it for me only it was half done.

    Stella dear please don't stop caring bcos of some ungrateful lots. God sees your heart and good intentions and I'm sure His blessings are raining on you.

    Much respect.

  10. Eyah! I feel bad reading your memo Stella. It's not only because some good story tellers would not get monetary reward for their stories any longer but also because I would not be compiling the results for you any longer, it feels good doing something for you. #crying# heeeheeeheeehiiiii

    Stella abeg let me start compiling something else for you na. You fit tell me make I start to dey mark register for IHN commenters. Make I dey take note of people wey cuss, pray, beg, advice, etc. At the end of each month, we reward them accordingly.

  11. Gist 3 for me. Stella is high time u realize that Nigerians are the most difficult people on planet earth, u cannot please them.

    U jump they will complain, u refuse to jump they will still complain, u fat.... ehh u too fat, u slim nko ohh u be like bonga fish, u dey friendly... them go say u be busy body, u keep to your self... them go say u too dey form. Just do your best and leave the rest for God.

    To those bvs that love abusing people for no reason... stop the bully, u don't know the battle the person is going through.... don't add to their misery.

    One love

  12. What happened to the continuation of gist 4, I was beginning to like it

  13. Today's gists tried
    Sorry for the insults SDK. I wonder why some people will want something from you and still be rude on top of it. When I'm begging Stella for something like I'm presently doing, I usually pray that no one comes under anonymous to cuss her in the comment section so that she will be in a good mood to help me. I don't know why some people are like that honestly...

  14. Why re some of u always insulting Stella to me is not funny at all,there is no blogger dat is nice n friendly the way she is,why do we always take good people for a fool.she as a good heart let respect dat pls.the insult is just too much,is not funny to me at all pls let stop.if u re not happy wit what she is doing then back out.

  15. Chai the toilet gist is so funny
    And stella pls stop allowing nasty pple get to u. For d sake of the good ones abeg

  16. Then it means i'll not visit this blog on Saturdays cos twill be very boring.

  17. Chai! Who are these wicked people insulting stella, for crying out loud, nobody gave her money to keep for anybody, so if she decides to gift the winner, we should be grateful.

    I hate ungrateful people. Stella, kpele joor.

  18. God help us all and deliver us from this entitlement mentality.Stella introduced the segment to create an atmosphere of fun while also rewarding participation but it seems some people will always want to ruin things for others.Your life does not depend on the reward and even if did have you stopped to ask what if I didn't win life will still go on allow her the liberty to pay at her own convenience. Now some people's attitude have blocked the opportunity for others who may truly need the money.May God help us learn decorum when relating with people.
    #blessed and highly favoured

    1. I swear same way the blocked ihn free adverts. Bitter leaf Cynthia dem

  19. Nigerians and their lousy sense of entitlement. That's why I rarely help anyone. The brazen insults I've received from hungry wretched fools that I've done favors. I'm not even looking for thank yous oh, that one I have given up on. The worst is when I tell them I can't assist a second time. The way they insult and rubbish you and call you names! I gave my self sense abeg.

    1. at anonymous let no one stop u frm doing good and being kind to people. Do as God as directed.

  20. Replies
    1. Sorry meant the disturbing person insulting Stella because I saw your comments down there

  21. I vote for gist two, because I've been there. In early 2000, i went to a wedding, at the reception ground, it was time for the bride to throw her bouquet, and the young girls/ladies ran to the empty floor, me being tall, i went behind the other ladies.
    I was wearing a fish tale long dress and as the bride threw the bouquet, i jumped to catch it, as i was landing on the floor, i heard a sound like something was tearing, behold it was my fish tale dress that was torn with the help of the heels of one other tall lady. As if that wasn't enough, my heel broke.

    Although, i caught the bouquet, i went home with a broken heel and a torn dress.



    I am the winner of last Saturday's In House Gist.
    Please Ma, I am very sorry for what I did. Please find a place in your and forgive me. I never doubted you for one day that you are not rich. You did not start In House Gist because of me and I beg you in the name of God Almighty not to close it because of me. Continue your good work Ma. I will accept the fact that you did not give me the reward as a punishment for my stupidity, but you closing the door to others because of my wrong deeds hurts me. I don't want the BVs that voted me to regret voting me.
    I am on my knees begging you and all the BVs to forgive me. In the abundance of you people's mercy, please forgive me.
    Mrs korkus, I sent an apology mail to you. I am very very sorry. Please forgive me.
    My lovely BVs, if cursing me will ease your anger and make you people forgive me, I take all in good fate.
    Thanks all for the forgiveness.
    God bless SDK and SDKers.
    "SDK is Special, BVs are Bae"

    1. Come with your ID and we will believe u. Arrogant NONSENSE

    2. Why would you behave like that in the 1st place? So u want ppl to curse u...dragging us to a pig level.

    3. Mummy korkus please the person has apologized pls forgive and forget please

    4. Nonsense. How did your brain even function. What you did didn't make sense at all. Stella not giving you the money serves you right. All these children without respect on this blog. Is stella your mate? Isir your money. See who dem wan help



    I am the winner of last Saturday's In House Gist.
    Please Ma, I am very sorry for what I did. Please find a place in your and forgive me. I never doubted you for one day that you are not rich. You did not start In House Gist because of me and I beg you in the name of God Almighty not to close it because of me. Continue your good work Ma. I will accept the fact that you did not give me the reward as a punishment for my stupidity, but you closing the door to others because of my wrong deeds hurts me. I don't want the BVs that voted me to regret voting me.
    I am on my knees begging you and all the BVs to forgive me. In the abundance of you people's mercy, please forgive me.
    Mrs korkus, I sent an apology mail to you. I am very very sorry. Please forgive me.
    My lovely BVs, if cursing me will ease your anger and make you people forgive me, I take all in good fate.
    Thanks all for the forgiveness.
    God bless SDK and SDKers.
    "SDK is Special, BVs are Bae"

  24. I tink my money ooooo made my day

  25. Stella please finish the gist 4, e sweet o

  26. LMAO...Frankool u got me there..hehehehehe nice quote

    1. Mrs korkus, please forgive me. I am the last Saturday's In House Gist Winner. I kneel down and beg u for forgiveness

  27. ah aunty stella it has not gotten to dat now, pls dnt stop been d good woman dat u is besides u hv really transformed so many lives already nd it is only God dat can reward u for ur good works, pls dnt be tired shogbo, beside they cant can gift to u wat u already hv nd since it is in ur nature to help people, dnt allow ur anger to get d best outta u. pls allow me apply for my begging first before u close chapter o

    Enter your comment...

  28. You people doing all what Stella said are just ungrateful and wretched! Yes! If you are not wretched you won't be asking for free money! I'm so pissed right now,how many people can be like Stella? She's just too tolerable,i can't! Hian! .Last week's winner,better apologize or na so you go dey beg beg upandan.i don talk my own,outta ere mehn! Bullshit!

    1. I have apologized up there. Please forgive me Sir/Madam

  29. Enter your comment...Madam pls don't b angry. all dis frustration na buhari cos am.pple are hungry. no vex.

  30. Aunty Stella we are very sorry...some people ehn the hatred and anger in them is enough to last them for a whole generation. Please don't let people get to're bigger than all that, there's a saying that says "a pig will always be a pig no matter how much you try to clean it up"
    Now you see the pigs from the real human beings
    It's a pity that it's when I was planning to now participate that you now want to cancel *lone tear*

  31. Stella, this world is full of wicked people, who takes advantage of good people, don't allow them to influence you. Keep the goodwork. Godbless you

  32. Lol....wonder shall never end, wetin money go cause or dis buhari season nor be small..SDK abeg take am easy on d guy, it will not happen again. God bless u and ur family for all u av done already through dis platform.

  33. I vote for the toilet gist.
    "Okoro no they tall pass the owner"

  34. Fellow BV's pls show respect stop insulting stella nd others,if what u say to others re said to u will u be happy?do to others as u want them to do to u.stella abeg pardon dat person nd continue supporting pple

  35. Sorry Stella l guess you have to get used to different types of people


  36. pls take hrt shogbo, allow me apply for my begging before u decide to close the chapter! i cant deal

    #Enter your comment...


  37. and as for d greedy creature may God hv mercy on u

    #Enter your comment...

  38. Stella dear, don't let peoples attitude get to u. Be You n nothing else. Remember that to be the best, u must have a character. Definitely you have made a mark for yourself n we know who u are. God will bless u for ur good works n openness. Stay blessed mii sis

  39. Sorry for the cusses and insults sdk, I was even planning to send my own whether I will win 5k to help my situation. Pls don't let few bad eggs spoil show for the many good ones. Don't take the insults to heart. Emabinu maami.

  40. okay this gist happened back then in an hostel close to mine in delsu,then robbing of hostels was trending and everyday in class you hear of stories of people being robbed until it happened in my hostel,you know that quote like a thief in d night lol that was how it happened we were not expecting them at all our hostel gen was on so they entered and spread out into each rooms one by one collecting thins from us,if you are smart and have heard how ruthless this boys are before they even knock on your day u jejely just open your door wide and place all your valuables and gadgets on the floor so as to hasten them robbing you and avoid chopping slaps.....there was this igbo guy in the hostel that is very stingy and will literally borrow everything from you but will never give you anything at all and times without number he has even boasted about how he has always outsmarted robbers in the past and never lost a thing to them until dat night when they entered his room,he quickly hid his new blackberry torch 2 because the phone just came out and was very expensive and he dey always use am take hype himself when the robbers entered his room and started asking for his valuables and bros started crying and begging that he has nothing oooo that he is an orphan and this room sef na him friend he dey squat with and stuff so 2 out of the 3 robbers that entered his room took pity after seeing how his room was just with a bed and reading table and searching all through his clothes only found 150 naira slapped him and got angry and said they should not waste thier time on him but 1 refused and said lai lai he cannot go like that so they left him and went to other rooms and the robber that stayed saw the charger on the wall and asked him whose charger was that and where is the blackberry bros started crying again ooo that the charger his for the next door neighbour who came to use his socket because of space and the robber said okay and said if at all you must get food for wacking i dey hungry you nor cook he said no oooo stammering,the robber walked to the kitchen and opened the pot to see ogbolo soup and smiled and was warming it and after that he put water on d fire for eba after the water hot he say oya come here make eba d guy dey shake anyhow and the robber say if you delay me i go shoot you the guy opened the basket of garri and was about pouring it when d robber saw the blackberry dipped inside d raw garri d robber shocked slapped d boy and was hitting him so the other robbers came back to the room and asked wetin they happen d guy told them and immediately d other 2 say he don do na GOD catch am leave am make we eat dey go abeg and so he make d eba nd as they were about serving the ogbono soup they found money 25k tied inside cellophine(forgive d spelling)dipped inside ewooo see shock and beating,dem say d guy na armed robber sef after beating dem carry am come outside call all of us tell us wetin happen bros was to ashamed to look at anyone the next day because of his greed and before the robbery sef he came to my room to eat saying he had no money at all and so GOD take expose am...pls vote for me ooo i need d money for school waka lol thank u

  41. Lol @ bv isaacson. That igbo boy odikwa very stingy.

    I vote gist 3

  42. Stella please don't stop making happy. Some of us are depressed we come here to put smiles on our faces

  43. Some people sef! When stella turned down my plea for help, I didn't insult her. It hasn't got to the level of throwing her insults cos she isn't charging any1 for anything.

    Pls stella there are genuine people out there who need these services you are rendering, don't allow the bad ones spoil their chances. God bless you.

  44. Hahahaha d'royalty and Stella, don't know who to say sorry for what is happening. Even Moses self vex for Israelites.
    You cannot satisfy humans. It is well

  45. Pls can this IHG be replaced with how i met your mother(or my spouse)? Didn't read the gist BTW.

  46. Don't mind da monkeys Stella, u have every right to be angry. Pls don't let d sins of one affect other individuals who genuinely need ur assistance. Biko ooh!


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