Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Service Year Boulevard -3

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Tuesday, 29 November 2016

Service Year Boulevard -3

The Service year is always full of stories.....






NYSC Batch B 2013, Oyo State

It was the final match of the football competition. No 4 platoon were one goal down to no 1 platoon and the match was about to end, and at the same time it was almost 6pm. Normally, once its 6pm, the biggle will sound, and all activities must halt; because the GIANT of AFRICA wants to sleep- but would resume after the biggle had sounded. But that temporary pause in activities would kill the tempo of the game and lessen the pressure with which no 4 platoon were attacking their opponents. As the game continued, no 7 jersey for no 4 platoon made a good cross to no 11 jersey, who in turn controlled the ball perfectly well and swiftly moved passed his marker, in preparation to launch a thunderous strike into the back of the net. Meanwhile, the biggler(a soldier) had already stood at attention, with the biggle already in his mouth, only for him to send mammoth breath into it to signal the sleeping time for the Giant of Africa. Two soldiers had already stood by the flag to lower it.


Just in that nick of time, no 11 jersey sent a strike goal-ward but the ball was parried by the goalkeeper. Then a defender for no 1 platoon made efforts to clear the ball away from danger zone, but he rang the bell...gbagaun. This gave no 11 jersey for no 4 platoon another chance to try again. This time, he didn't miss: as he fired a Gabriel Batistuta kinda shot past the helpless goalkeeper into the net. As spectators were about to roar in jubilation, just then, the biggle sounded...... Everything paused: the goal scorer, his colleagues, fans, the ref, even the women at mami market. Everything that has breath came to a standstill, except for some goats and fowls roaming around sha. Lol


Before then were interesting competitions like: singing, dancing, cooking, debate, drama, comedy, mr macho, ms NYSC, and so on. I represented my platoon in the comedy and debate competitions. Of all the 10 platoons competing on camp, no 10 platoon were the best from behind. Always 10/10 in every competition. The camp DJ always played the Naeto C 10/10 track for them. 7 platoon was the overall best platoon, with highest winnings in the competitions. My no 6 platoon won mr
macho, came 2nd in the ms NYSC pageant, I also came 3rd in the comedy competition.


As for the food on camp- it was all crap! Except Sundays that we got to eat descent jollof rice and tiny chicken legs. On a very cold morning, when the menu was hot but watery tea; hawkers of cold pure water within the camp can be very funny and annoying as they will still beg us to buy cold pure-water. The question I always ask was: shey pesin dey take water drink water ni? e just tire me 4 dem.


As for my ppa at Ilora Baptist Grammar sch, Oyo, Oyo state, I was a ghost corper throughout. On the nysc certificate collection day, I almost died. The woman sharing the cert only had 2 cert left after giving other corpers theirs. So we were 3 corpers left yet to collect. I'd already thought that: last last, dis pipu don get me! So of the 2 cert left, the woman called the owner of 1, remaining just one cert and two corpers left. Myself and the last corper looked at each other like: warris dis?


My heart was already thumping loudly, that I could hear my own heartbeat. The woman just announce me as the owner of the last cert. I collected it and started gamboling upandan.. Lol. The last corper got his cert too. The woman mistakenly left it in her brown paper bag.




*Please this your introduction confused me,you tried to create suspense but it didnt ''werk'' for me..maybe for others sha..hehehehe

42 comments:

white Berry said...

Lovely experience

JACINTA MBACHU said...

Will send mine soon. Shout out to 2014/2015 stream2 kogi state it was fun though

Anonymous said...

It didn't werk at all at all,you are right. I kept expecting something,it never came.

Former Flirt said...

Very interesting piece. You put it so well that it has that fictitious feel to it.

Monkeynofine said...

Please post comments

Ideato/ilaje blood said...

Diary of a International Student.....

Ideato/ilaje blood said...

Enjoyed only the last paragraph. Skipped most sha

Audrey said...

Poster you are a good story writer, I enjoyed reading this. Clearly you enjoyed yourself in camp. Which is also what I did in camp. I participated In most camp activities for my platoon. I was an usher in nccf, I didn't join Nacc cos to me it was boring, lol. Camp life was a wonderful experience.

Amaka Ukandu said...

Issorai

Classic Chic! said...

Which kind story be dis na? Mtchw!

Everytime futbol futbol mtchw!

Anonymous said...

Some of you here are wicked, Stella inclusive. Ideato wey be Ilaje pesin like me sef say my nysc tori no sweet. Wicked pipu

KIDJO said...

πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘✌✌✌..I sight you fellow Kogi ex Corper.

Yung Chill said...

No vex...
Terrific experience...you go sabi do commentary...go try am..

Kokomma said...

You too, Stella you for no post am na, people are different, that's the posters style, Biko free

STAY AT HOME DAUGHTER said...

I didn't finish it. Got bored.

Christy Odoo said...

Lol... Can't wait to serve my fatherland

Anonymous said...

U be witch ideato how do u know dat is the exact thing I did, I skipped most

Kim Kardashian Aka portable queen of sdk blog said...

Nice

Anonymous said...

I agree with Stelz today. Poster kole werk.

Anonymous said...

Of 'an' International Student

Gracious said...

Yay! Finally got my blog id. Hello everyone. Please welcome me. Stella you are the bestest. I like some really cool people here. Will list out my favourite later.

billy sule said...

Hahaha same thing I did

Mrs I said...

Hehehe i love ur story but u wuld av told us what happened after d giant went to sleep na

stunning slim shady said...

Dry introduction, I kud not read past d 1st paragraph...😏😏😏😏

Ideato/ilaje blood said...

An** that was a typo

Ideato/ilaje blood said...

Lol

Naturelle Osasere said...

Nice
I miss igbere community in Bende LGA in Abia state,lovely people with their big big mansion Hahahahaha maybe that's where my dream of marrying an igbo man started okbye

Anonymous said...

lol...i served in 1991 in kebbi state. the allowance then was just N350...wont talk about some of my funny experiences cos some of my friends might decode me if they read this blog.. i had lived in the north before then but never in the core north so i refused to sleep with the platoon commandant like some other girls did just to redeploy..we sha attended alot of parties while in camp sotay our fellow corpers were vexing say dem dey carry dia girls commot.they even wanted to do protest march at a point sef.lmao..who wont want to enjoy better food and drinks over the dry camp food...my experience during NYSC there sha taught me that hausa men can be randy eeeh. they can toast like mad. but a hausa man can dash you better money if he likes you without seeing your pant unlike igbo guys wey go buy you fanta and suya but just want to fuck on top....lol i also learnt that not all women who were hijab are holy and innocent..I met a few who smoked and one hajia who was a lesbian toasted me sef, na my skinny legs then i take run from her side oh... i also first heard about kayan mata in kebbi...aphrodisiacs they use to enhance sex life..its a common thing among their women. if you marry sef dey go husband house dem go put for your load...it comes in all types, the one u lick like sweet, drink or put in your punani...some make you wet, have plenty stamina, make your pussy taste sweet etc so that when the man taste you na no going back be that..me i no use oh cos i didnt have a boyfriend to use it on, but when they come to sell to you they explain all these...(side eyes ate those bvs wey go don they ask this question for dia mind)..there are also some that are laced with jazz sha as i later found out. some they put in powder, kajal and the one u put in your punani so that when a man makes love to you whatever you ask he must do for you...I enjoyed my service year sha and even tho they wanted to retain me in my PPA, i refused and told them i wanted to sha go back home which was lagos...in all i think the NYSC scheme was a laudable dream meant for national integration however, the attendant problems and plenty issues bedeviling the scheme has made it necessary for it to be seriously reviewed if not scrapped...my advice to young intending corpers is to go with an open mind to learn about others, their cultures and other ways of doing stuff..don't be that personality who was born in lagos, did primary, sec and university education then want to come and serve in lagos..haba its just a year. no wonder some Nigerians are so myopic and very discriminatory of others..so far where you are going is not a volatile area then you have no excuse to be paying money and sleeping with people upandan just to redeploy....however be vigilant and prayerful as the days we are in are evil. do your jobs diligently as you don't know what doors God can open through anybody or whatever you find your hands to do...cheers

Anonymous said...

Abeg i don tire for dis camp of a thing shuu.. Na like dis camp dey dey bikonu.. 2 o clock i don wake up dey prepare 4..30 parade ground till 9 nawa oo abeg i wan go home oo i no camp again

Anonymous said...

lol...i served in 1991 in kebbi state. the allowance then was just N350...wont talk about some of my funny experiences cos some of my friends might decode me if they read this blog.. i had lived in the north before then but never in the core north so i refused to sleep with the platoon commandant like some other girls did just to redeploy..we sha attended alot of parties while in camp sotay our fellow corpers were vexing say dem dey carry dia girls commot.they even wanted to do protest march at a point sef.lmao..who wont want to enjoy better food and drinks over the dry camp food...my experience during NYSC there sha taught me that hausa men can be randy eeeh. they can toast like mad. but a hausa man can dash you better money if he likes you without seeing your pant unlike igbo guys wey go buy you fanta and suya but just want to fuck on top....lol i also learnt that not all women who were hijab are holy and innocent..I met a few who smoked and one hajia who was a lesbian toasted me sef, na my skinny legs then i take run from her side oh... i also first heard about kayan mata in kebbi...aphrodisiacs they use to enhance sex life..its a common thing among their women. if you marry sef dey go husband house dem go put for your load...it comes in all types, the one u lick like sweet, drink or put in your punani...some make you wet, have plenty stamina, make your pussy taste sweet etc so that when the man taste you na no going back be that..me i no use oh cos i didnt have a boyfriend to use it on, but when they come to sell to you they explain all these...(side eyes ate those bvs wey go don they ask this question for dia mind)..there are also some that are laced with jazz sha as i later found out. some they put in powder, kajal and the one u put in your punani so that when a man makes love to you whatever you ask he must do for you...I enjoyed my service year sha and even tho they wanted to retain me in my PPA, i refused and told them i wanted to sha go back home which was lagos...in all i think the NYSC scheme was a laudable dream meant for national integration however, the attendant problems and plenty issues bedeviling the scheme has made it necessary for it to be seriously reviewed if not scrapped...my advice to young intending corpers is to go with an open mind to learn about others, their cultures and other ways of doing stuff..don't be that personality who was born in lagos, did primary, sec and university education then want to come and serve in lagos..haba its just a year. no wonder some Nigerians are so myopic and very discriminatory of others..so far where you are going is not a volatile area then you have no excuse to be paying money and sleeping with people upandan just to redeploy....however be vigilant and prayerful as the days we are in are evil. do your jobs diligently as you don't know what doors God can open through anybody or whatever you find your hands to do...cheers

Miss Ferragamo said...

Sheyb na una dey find article,make una deal with am.😁
Poster in a bid to create a perfect write-up,you kind of messed it all up. You sha had fun, Welldone.

Miss Ferragamo said...

Ideato I don't get.
Are you saying the poster was an international student or international students don't serve?

Miss Ferragamo said...

Ehyaa bros no vex,try WNB.

Miss Ferragamo said...

Welcome on board πŸ’‹

STARRY LARRY said...

Stella abeg delete this crap jare, wetin be this now




*Larry was here*

STARRY LARRY said...

You definately sent this trash




*Larry was here*

Mao Akuh said...

The kind thing wey some chics did then eh....#NYSCmemories and some married pastors.
My friend and torch-light became best friend.

Amacastel said...

Me too cos I barely understand what the poster said it dis long epistle.metwww

Anonymous said...

That would be a very nice SDK segment. SDK dearie please take note

Precix books and cakes said...

I just skipped to the end

sdk's first lady said...

It didn't werk for me eitherπŸ˜•

yummy said...

stella post my comment o choi.

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