Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Jokes Time...

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Saturday, December 03, 2016

Jokes Time...

Got anything that might makes the difficult ones here Laugh a little and loosen up?




A guy mistakenly transferred N200k (out of N210k balance in his account) to a wrong account number via mobile money transfer. After thinking of a way to stop the person from withdrawing the money, he came up with an idea of sending a text message to the person's phone number saying:
"Hello dark and worthy initiate, I hope you're OK. I believe you have received the money I sent to you. It's for your
initiation into the eternal mystical order of glorious satanism in the Ogboni fraternity scheduled to take place tomorrow at 12 midnight. That money is only for your transport. I'll send you more for shopping. There are riches awaiting you in this kingdom. Two weeks after the initiation, a family member
very close to your heart will die, this will unlock your ticket to wealth and you will have the ability to fly at night to any part
of the world. Thanks in advance. But in case you're not ready to join, please send back the money immediately to avoid ur sudden death."
Five minutes later, he got an SMS saying:
"Please send another N200k, my friend is also interested. Nigerian economy has frustrated us too much."
The man fainted......
Don't laff alone πŸ˜„πŸ˜„πŸ˜„πŸ˜„πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚. Good day friends

75 comments:

  1. Asides from the fact Dat boredom is making me lose my sanity, I got nothing else

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Is dis me on the first comment or someone else?? Boredom u do well jaare

      Delete
    2. Chai, the thing this recession is causing ehn. Lol.

      Delete
  2. Will sit this one out and read comments

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What happened to all the heartbroken girls that used
      to flood my comment with their depressing
      Rants and sad updates?

      I miss you guys....

      life isn't the same with out you.



      Mc pinky

      Delete
    2. Kwakwakwakwakwa okay they have remixed the joke okwaya issorite

      Delete
  3. Seen this before,though still funny.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Bv elastic come in here stella has given u a forum

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. your girlfriend move with car charger in her hand-
      bag but you do not own a car.

      what do want me to tell u again....

      Devil is at work


      Mc pinky

      Delete
  5. MMM has finished me ooo!!!!
    I borrowed 110,000 to do this MMM that has been
    trending, just to get a little thing and send the
    money back to the owner.
    However,my trouble began when after providing
    help, I requested to get help of 150,000 and all
    MMM could do was to match me with my landlord
    whom I've been owing rent of 135,000.
    Now see what my landlord did: he called me on
    phone to say, "Ralph, it seems MMM matched me
    with you to pay you 150,000"
    Me: Hhhmm! Yes sir!
    Landlord: I hope you still remember my rent of 10
    months you're owing me?
    Me: I will pay sir.
    Landlord: I will just upload your house rent receipt
    and you will confirm me, then later come and
    collect your remaining balance in my house.


    Mc pinky

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I tried to laugh. I really did

      Delete
    2. Makes no sense. You for explain how the mmm works

      Delete
    3. Haaaahaaaa crazy

      Delete
    4. If I'll be given 1k each time I see this joke, I'd be a millionaire now. πŸ˜’

      Delete
    5. @Anon13:28

      Am not after explaining such tinz...OK....am an Mc and has notin to do with mmm..I use everytin I see or come across to creator my jokes..

      Thanks for the correction but *wink*


      Mc pinky

      Delete
    6. Lol...very funny,cos you made me laugh so hard.

      Delete
    7. Baddest guy, you really cracked me up

      Delete
  6. they're many things we can learn from dogs, like
    being loyal, protective,caring and loving

    unconditionally but some idiots choose one thing

    "Doggie style"


    Mc pinky

    ReplyDelete
  7. The best way to know Akwa ibom girl real name
    is to promise her cash deposit and ask for her
    bank details, that's when Natasha will turn to
    Ekaette.


    Mc pinky

    ReplyDelete
  8. Stella, no time to laugh ooo, cos person heart still they do gbim gbim gbim.

    ReplyDelete
  9. yes he send more ,his plan didn't work out lolzzzzzz.

    ReplyDelete
  10. bring on the funny jists ojare... Wanna be entertained

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Some girls cannot wait for 3 years for a fresh graduate to get a job, but they can wait 12 years for a guy in America to come back. Sister,

      your deliverance needs 7 bottles of anointing oil



      Mc pinky

      Delete
  11. Eno says:
    Hmmmm, just when I thought my troubles are over,
    now this again. Where will I start from God?
    A good samaritan helped me with a container here
    after months of begging for one here. I started my
    small business thanking God for his mercies until the
    rain that fell yesterday. The street where I was selling
    is usually flooded anytime it rains. That yesterday, I
    had gone to pick my daughter in school when the
    rain started and by the time it stopped and I came
    back, I did not see my container again at the spot
    where I mounted it. Neighbours said the flood had
    carried it away. I fainted immediately. Now I'm lying
    on the hospital bed as I type this. I just wish the
    doctor can inject me let me die. I'm tired of this life

    Stella Eno has got to win this, I laughed so hard while trying to play out the scenero in my head.. I saw the comment from Friday ihn thanks to droyalty..
    Pls Eno has won.

    ReplyDelete
  12. And someone said she supports the increase in data tariff so that trolls like us won't troll their fake asses.
    Mmm? OK o. Me too I will increase my 'collections' on my sugar daddies.
    Please pray it ain't ur husband.
    *im outieeee*

    ReplyDelete
  13. Lol,am spending my day here o.bring it on guys.

    ReplyDelete
  14. pls bvs where can i get that hausa kunu that makes the pussy wet and sweet? I'm in Edo state

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Buy tiger nut and soak it for a day.use a blinder or grinding machine to grind it with date if u like add coconut.seive and add sugar to ur taste


      **BV 'yar kano**

      Delete
  15. pls bvs where can i get that hausa kunu that makes the pussy wet and sweet? I'm in Edo state

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If u ave anyone in KATSINA, tell d person to help u out...or get debino and kwakwa...its very gud


      Mc pinky

      Delete
  16. MC pinky, your jokes are always dry! sassy munch fire abd sparkle, how d ashewo biz dey go?

    ReplyDelete
  17. MC pinky, your jokes are always dry! sassy munch fire and sparkle, how d ashewo biz dey go?

    ReplyDelete
  18. Serious hunger in the land

    ReplyDelete
  19. Replies
    1. Bvs in owerri, im selling tickets for house of freeda white ball if you're interested holla😘😘😘😘😘😘itz gonna be lit

      Delete
    2. I've got mine already...most def goin to be lit but stuffy.

      Delete
  20. Hahahahaha kikikikikiki

    ReplyDelete
  21. Sachet cowbell is now N50
    80 Leaves Exercise book is now N120
    GALA is now is N70
    Smallest Handkerchief is now N80
    Titus sardine is now N300
    Smallest Detergent is N30
    Eggroll with half egg is now N70
    Smallest bread is now N80
    Bag of sachet water is now N150
    And the list goes on. ..

    Angels of the Lord. Are the trumpet not ready yet???
    Or which other signs do you need ? ? ?


    #Endtimes

    ReplyDelete
  22. #Give the world the best you have and the best will come back to you*

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. U must have graduated from Regina pacis secondary school... Cos dats d say there.. Like their watchword

      Delete
    2. Gorreti Bae, I went to RP too but I didn't finish dere.. ..

      Delete
  23. Lol
    Let the comments roll in*wink*

    ReplyDelete
  24. Modele was with me in the house when my phone rang. It was
    a foreign number. I answered and the person on the other end was
    hysterical, asking if I was all right. She introduced herself as Stella
    Dimoko Korkus. Modele took the phone from me and introduced
    herself as my personal assistant. Dimoko Korkus went on to say she
    had just confirmed the story of Anita’s pregnancy and was about to
    break it on her blog; she just wanted to find out if I was okay, and
    she’d call again. Humiliated as I was, I didn’t know if I was to beg her.... I hail oo. Sdk made it to toke's book. I love you sdk

    ReplyDelete
  25. Nepa nepa nepa how many times I call una? The thunder, the thunder, the thunder. Make I no finish am. So una want make I miss Santa post on sdk Abi? Una plans av failed in Jesus name. 😏😎

    ReplyDelete

  26. I was watching Christmas drama rehearsal by a church drama group yesterday at KATSINA town,nd I nearly burst into tears...Mary told Joseph she was pregnant,nd Joseph shouted "Jesus Christ" for who?nd I became confused... πŸ˜‚πŸ˜€πŸ˜†


    Mc pinky

    ReplyDelete
  27. Coolio (Mama Patience Sister)3 December 2016 at 14:40

    Jeez! Everybody has abandoned this room for Santa room. What am I now looking for here?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Your comment made me go to that post. Chi mo! I'm in need but seeing people's stories just made me grateful. I pray those in dire straits get the help they need.

      Delete
  28. In Nigeria.
    Behind every successful man is a good woman and behind every successful woman is people wondering who and who she slept with....

    #DontQuoteMe#

    ReplyDelete
  29. *This one killed me for sure!*

    *During sex .....*
    Village girl : *You are not wearing a condom ?*
    Man : *Yes Why?*
    Village girl: *Hope you are not HIV +positive ...*
    Man: *No ...am not Baby*
    Village girl: *Good.. I don't want to get that thing again..*
    *Man fainted* πŸ˜‚.πŸ˜‚.πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

    ReplyDelete
  30. *☎Phone rings☎*:
    *GIRL:* Hello
    *GUY:* My L♡ve how are you doing?
    *GIRL:* Am fine.
    *GUY:* Will you be free during the weekend, & can you come to my house🏠?
    *GIRL:* Am sorry I cant make it because I will be attending my Aunty's weddingπŸ‘°πŸ½and the next
    day I'll be busy, I'm so occupied.
    *GUY:* Ooh ok, I was just planning to take you out for shopping, suprise you with an iPhoneπŸ“± 7 (256 GB jetblack) then buy you the dressπŸ‘—, louboutin shoesπŸ‘ πŸ‘ you've been asking for...
    *GIRL:* I will be coming & I may even spend the whole weekend there if you want my L♡ve.
    *GUY:* What about the
    weddingπŸ‘¨πŸΎπŸ‘°πŸ½?
    *GIRL:* Which wedding, I was only joking.
    *GUY:* Me too!
    πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

    ReplyDelete
  31. FOR LAUGHS πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

    *An Arab was admitted in the Hospital for a heart operation, but prior to the surgery the doctors needed to store his blood in case the need arises. As the gentleman had a rare type of blood, it couldn't be found locally. So the call went out to the neighboring towns. Finally an Igbo guy was located who had a similar type of blood. The IGBO guy willingly donated his blood for the Arab. After the surgery,the Arab sent the Igbo guy as appreciation, a new BMW 540iL, diamonds, lapis lazuli jewelry, and half a million US dollars. Once again the Arab had to go through a corrective surgery. His doctor telephoned the igbo dude who was more than happy to donate his blood again. After a successful surgery, the Arab sent the dude a thank you card and a box of almond chocolate & sweets. The igbo guy was shocked to see that the Arab this time did not reciprocate his kind gesture as he had anticipated. He phoned the Arab and told him, 'I thought this time you would give me Toyota Prado, Diamonds and Jewelry. But you gave only a card and a box of almond chocolate & sweets. To this the Arab replied 'Nwanne I can't help it, ..... Now I have igbo blood running in my veins!!!*

    ReplyDelete
  32. An old man wrote a will to his two sons, after my death demolish this house you will find a metal case down the foundation where you will find my saving to support the rest of your life. They started praying to God! Oh lord father our Dad is too old, please take him to your kingdom. Two years later he died and buried immediately. The following day the house was demolished, they found a case with peice of paper written! if you are real men construct your own House. πŸ˜³πŸ˜œπŸ˜€πŸ˜ƒπŸ˜„πŸ˜†πŸ˜…πŸ˜‚πŸ€“πŸ˜Ž

    ReplyDelete
  33. Sent to me by a friend...very funny. Lol.

    A woman was trekking with her little son today, and the boy was seriously crying indicating that he is tired. then a man said
    MAN: Madam please carry the little boy he is tired
    WOMAN: Okay sir thanks
    MAN: you welcome, whats the boys name?
    WOMAN: Buhari!
    MAN: Jesus! Bring down the idiot let him continue trekking.πŸ˜‚
    Don't laff alone plsss

    ReplyDelete
  34. Bayo told Ngozi that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret and that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying; "I know the whole truth"

    Ngozi decided to go home and try it out.

    She got home and ran into her mother and said; Mummy, "I know the whole truth"

    Her mother quickly handed her a N500 Note and said; Please don't tell your father.

    When her father got home from work, she walked up to him and said; Daddy, I know the whole truth.

    Her father quickly took her aside and gave her N2,000 and said; Don't tell your mother please.

    Wow! Amazed by this, she ran out to meet the Gate Man and said; I know the whole truth.

    The Gate Man quickly dropped the padlock and embraced her tightly and said; *Thank God, you know that I am your father*πŸ˜³πŸ˜³πŸ™†πŸΏπŸ™†πŸΏπŸ™†πŸΏπŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

    ReplyDelete
  35. I paid a dear friend a visit. His wife served us supper with plenty meat, yet their kids had only sliced onions n tomatoes on their meals to eat. After the meal, I asked my friend why we had this plenty meat and his kids had none. He said " what should I do, when they say they won't eat dog meat? 😁😁😁

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hahahahhaaha.This one just had to get me. Lol

      Delete
  36. This habbit of some girls wearing, Earrings, Nose ring, Plenty necklace, Belly button ring, Leg chain, Bangles e.t.c... Is getting out of hand! A girl fell down today and sounded like STAINLESS PLATE
    πŸ˜…πŸ˜…

    ReplyDelete
  37. Ewww... Shines Teeth..

    ReplyDelete
  38. All these girls forming tomboy, sagging, wearing over size tees, packing imaginary balls....shey you know your period is coming next week...

    ReplyDelete

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