Chooooi Stella is that the promised couch 😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁
It's not you its me orI think you're better off without me orI don't think I am the one for you or I don't have enough money to take care of you and it hurts me orI am not in the right frame of mind to do this please understand orI'm going through some things right now and I don't think we are good together orAll we do is fight.
I laughed soo hard the first time I saw this joke😂😂😂😂😂😂
Choi all I see is that couch,which kain couch b dis!!!!;
Sorry you are not a graduate, we are not compatible
Stella this your couch na Ebano.
We are not fit for each other you know ehen! Mtcheewww
Stella, you wicked no be small, I reject that couch.I will just tell the guy I'm tired, mind you, nobody has ever broken up with me, I will just leave the relationship and said I'm not interested again*Larry was here*
I don't know o, have never been heartbroken before
There is no brakeup line we just went our separate ways.
Stella the worst break up is the cushion abi Na couch you gave us
I didn't have any
I asked him who am I to you and then he said eh eh are you not my girl. I asked him the second question what are we doing and then he said we are still trying to know each other.lol shit happens I have gotten over it but it made me to realise that nobody owes you any explanation in this life,the sooner you get that the better for you.
Change of sim card.
Stella pls just bring the other couch like that. I've learnt my lesson. pls. this is like jumping from fry pan to fire.
Mine was"I have fallen out of love with you and if you are the first lady of the whole world,i wouldn't want to have anything to do with you ".I was shattered and this was a four years relationship o
Got her new boo to pick her call and announce it. Later discovered new boo was actually there before me! I was used as soft landing for lover's quarrel! He later drove by to return most of my valuable gifts. I got back by shagging 2 of her sisters who had been eyeing me, 2 friends of hers & a kid sister of the boo. I tried to get him sacked, petty I know, common sense prevailed and I let them all be. She married him sha, so I guess alls well that ends well!
Let me read comments*grabs cucumber*
Hahahahhahahhahahaha.... I just stop picking up calls.Not sure I've ever had a break up line
Haaa, nooo not the gate line but a guy broke up with me cos he was in school for predegree program and I was at home helping my mum with sales... the Irony, we gained admission same year, similar courses, I graduated with first class and he with 2-2 (no pun intended), I have a very good job that pays very well and is inline with my course of study, He works at the airport and his salary at best a fifth of mine. Just had to add
*My pastor said you are not my wife'
Honestly Stella, you should be a stand up comic!! See the old worn out couch!! Hahahahahaha This couch is for all those complaining that she should change the one she normally uses. So she's giving y'all what you requested!! Hahahahahaha Stella, your sense of humour is epic!
do u want us to breakup,after d long sermon ,I want us to breakup @miss hottie
Giving him head. He was excited much with one hand behind the door knob the other on my head. Took a small break to get Cd. That walk from the bathroom to the room was the last he saw me. I left him a note saying babe I can't anymore. How dare you f**k my friend and still pretend we cool. We re done!! He desperately wanted a release and I left him wanting.
Which kind rubbish couch be this?I don't even remember any break up line They just start acting up and eventually we'll part ways
Stella,#BringBackOurCouchThis one is dilapidated.Worst break up line was"You are too overambitious for my liking and u would never respect me if u have money more than I do"I had to let the "fuckboy" go...Now I am balling and the lady he left me to marry is now a puff puff seller in the market.To think my boo is an Engineer and I almost settled for a painter where I dey do "e go better"Ladies,never settle for less.. If he wants to go,let him go...Someone better will find u.
Kai.... That my 2nd bf.. It took almost two years to recover. I just woke up to pictures of he and his new girl on fb. I thought it was his course mate as i was still a unihome student that time. But mba, after calling and asking him who she was he said shes his girlfriend.. Then i asked about us he said we were just friends.. Naso i enter friendzone o..he didnt even respect me enough to breakup with me... Thank God for my friend ada.. I love u bestie.
I just walk away. They all dont deserve an explanation. I don't have time for drama.
Mine was "pls stop calling before u.damage my phone"...choi!!!!! I was dazed. Is it because of this small quarrel? Today I am happily married with beautiful kids while he is still doing fine boy on the streets of abj. Good riddance sha.
This always works for me...I've given my life to Christ, and I want to start afresh with God..
I'm sorry you were just a rebound
Will be back to read comments..
It's not you, it's me lol
Ok..I've forgotten jor.Can't remember because I've learnt how to format my mind as soon as I'm done with a relationship ☺☺☺
Let the comments roll
One of my ex said HE DIED for 3 days...
Stella, pls we can manage the former couch, we'd just need to kill the bedbugs, this one can break spine.Worst breakup line: Its not you, its me... I need to settle my demons.
You are too good for me..Add us for all your EXPRESS ERRANDSS in Lagos, from Lagos anywhere in Nigeria and around the world.
It's not u, it's me.
Lol, this happened few years ago. I took her shopping, got her a lot of things, we got back home she requested for unprotected sex I refused cause she was very excited, I wore my Rain boot and after it, I told her the reasons for ending the relationship she thought I was kidding till I asked her to dress up and leave, she left and watched me Lock up the gate behind her and started crying, she pleaded to change and all but I was so done with her...
U KNOW WHAT? IF I TELL YOU I AM STILL INTERESETED IN THIS RELATIONSHIP AFTER TWO YEARS I WOULD BE LIEING TO U. I DONOT WANT TO WASTE YOUR TIME. GBAM. MY HEAD SPINNED
*Spreads mat on the floor*😂😂😂😂😂
Wat kinda couch is dis one nau? Chei stella abeg pity us n bring a Yankee couch jor,even dou some of us neva reach obodoyonder,we go try reach der via ur couch so bring one nice one come o
Lol @ format my mind
Kai!!!!That's so me!!
Damn! U are bad ass jor lol just like the movies
Kai!!!You need Jesus!
Can we have the former couch back please? This is an eyesore.
How you doing darling?I'll just burn down the house with the oga and gate man inside.
💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔 do you pressurize them??
I was a side chick and I knew it( but love and loneliness is not good sha o) I knew we weren't heading anywhere cos he refused to break up with his main chick, I just saw his picture on SM where he knelt down to propose to her, the bastard didn't even have the decency to call me. Oh well it was a case of good riddance to bad rubbish. Hehehehe. Choi guys can be mean sha.
U are too good for me....i don't deserve u you deserve someone better "its nt u its me ok?
I have a calling to be a Pastor.
I dunno why I'm blank. Maybe mostly cos we just go our separate ways but the one wey break up with me wey really pain me gan was eons ago. I'd have to still be into him to remember the break up line.
U hve over-stayed your welcome
'Pray that God will open ur eyes cos I may not be ur right man' painful but had 2 let go,2months later I met a better guy n we've been married 4 9months now with baby on the way.
You dated a painter and am sure an illiterate.Thank God he left you... Thank God you now have sense
Kidjo in this case we are twins... My colleague even asked me if u was a man in my former world
I called u & a guy picked it meanwhile I was in my hostel sleeping & my fone was off. He also destroy his r/ship wit his bff wen he had problems wit his results by lying he was a cultist so that his people. Won't start calling d guy .He later called & was begging but I could only manage to forgive & not forget.Ex will always remain behind where they belong.
@Ideato, you have started again I see.I don't ever refer or talk to myself on this blog and 1 question mark(?) is enough.
Hahahahhahahhah. Sure u dated linda eze
Prophet revealed to me that we should end things. Smh. Craze pipu
Enter your comment...mine is UR YOUNGER SIS IS PRETTIER DAN U,CAN I HAVE HA NO
It doesn't change d fact dt u r a ex meaning expired.Ntoor
Pastor said...sometimes after engagement or close to traditional sites. N.a. wa. Dem no pray before proposing?
I've given my life to christ...Lol
He asked me for my friend's number and started asking her out. He cheated and that was the "am breaking up with you.
*say, thanks @Ideato*Larry was here*
If u know u r not ready to do, just let me be. Don't call me again.
Mine was... 'Its not my fault that i'm a fine boy and this other lady has won my heart, I can not date a lonely, fat, plumpy girl.'. Thank God for that break-up, i'm in a much better, rich, loving and happier place. Infact, there is no comparison between 'that night' and 'this day'.
Madam Naomi I know u are the one
Did u feel better after ur revenge?
LolzStella nawa oo for this couch ooo
If anything happens and we don't get married,forgive me.
U r a catholic & where u come 4rm,una dey tear eye & when u start intern & working,be giving ur salary.haha.umunwoke di oooo
I also like a girl that has a job as per working class and you are not.
Pls come and punish me also.... i'm a very bad person, i need ur kind of rehabilitation.
I have three prophets praying for me in Benin,Kano and Abuja.It depends on the outcome of their prayer is.
Its not you,its me.
Are u an idiot. Ur job now na to dey correct ppl shei....no go borrow sense. Joblessness na disease. Mchew @ lolo ideato
It's OK cheers, but I think it's better u move ahead with your studies and all, time and chance has really separated us. It's well with you. Thanks.This is the line my ex used for me, it was epic
My then neighbour told my hair stylist she isn't a graduate so they cant continue the relationship!! Now she's in 300level studying English and Linguistics.Mine was my ex, I refused s3x and he said I am starving him and then he said I have water spirit. Now I am married he won't allow me rest.
My ex once told me... I travelled and gave instructions that no one should pick my call.. Shuu..... I was surprised, do people travel within Nigeria and give instructions not to pick calls, why didn't he switch off the fone. It was the same number I call sometimes and it would say line busy meaning that the other person is on call. I put on my running shoe.
I met this dude when I was serving and we got on like wildfire. Word later got to me that he had a serious girlfriend abroad and when I confronted him, he said they were once an item but are no more dating and besides,'What does he need silver for when, he's got gold'? Foolish me thought I was the Gold and the other babe was silver..... my eyes cleared when I saw their wedding pix on line 2 months after I left that city after my service......I got some satisfaction years later when I saw a news article about his arrest by EFCC over his involvement in some shady bank deals. God punish you!
He sent me a msg,U r way too old for me to take to my mum(at 34) lol..After 1yr.
You deserve someone better!!!!!!!
#crying and laughing at the same time, ideoto is a fool ... Hahaha
Ideato the trouble maker
See this one. Who be Naomi?
Doppel leave Ideato. She is a troublemaker
Lmao@who am I to you.That question is some how.
You are a very nice person and J dont think I deserve you.You deserve a more better person.This couch is worse than recession couch oooo
Anonymous 14:01...no she's not an idiot! This is the problem with our people, you make mistake & you're corrected...it turns into war. Them leave your to bask in your stupidity, it turns to them being bad friends. Let her take the correction & improve...what bloody nonsense is "brakeup"? Tomorrow now na dem go form pass
You just start live na
I never break up with anyone, I just back slide out of the relationship like I was never in it, I stop taking your calls etc it's like we never happened and no one breaks up with me cus I was never dating just you, if I notice any useless moves I shift all my attention to the next guy.
Hahahaha Lolo ideato dey kolo oo
He sed "can we just be friends"
Forgive my cluelessness but what's wrong with that answer "we're still getting to know each other"? You wanted him to tell you you're his spirit wife?
Are you a runs girl? That's the surest & easiest way to get away from y'all
Stella this couch is worse ooo😂😂😂😂😂😂Mine was....I am not good for you, you need someone better than meI'm not in my right mind now Things can't work between us anymore Fuck guys mehn!!!!!!!!!!!
Wow!!! Really? I'm not settling for less abeg
Anonymous 13:16...so you have his dick stench & pre-cum in your mouth with pubic hair stuck in your teeth & you're looking for who to dump it on?
Holy Molly!Can someone actually say that to anyone?Mehnnn!!!This is wicked
Because you're married with a litter of kids doesn't make you better than him
Hey boo... 😘😘😘😘😘
And the other ex said you are too good for me. Whatever that means.
I hate break ups/when una too dey gbensh, why wont there be break ups up and down. I raise beyonce hands for those ladies who had and are still gbenshing my future husband.
Stella bring back the other couch.I won't complain again!
mine was.. see enh i have a project i am about to start that will take ten (10) years of my life, i dont want to keep u waiting. u deserve better. choi!
Linda eze learn to mind ur business. Since ur husband left u for a classy lady, u became so bitter that you even have to transfer ur aggression to people. Yaba left is looking for u since u left there pls go back and receive ur treatment.
Break up line??? Thinking 😕😕😕😕....Nah, I don't think soI won't even give you a chance to break up sef, like once I notice a constant character that I can't live with, I'll quickly format my brain and friendzone you so fast, you won't even remember we were once a couple.... Next thing, I'll start gisting you about my mall visits with my other 'friends',you'll still be wondering what's going on!! I'll still keep you as a friend oooo, calling you an EX means you once meant something to me, ain't nobody got time for that!! 🏃🏃🏃🏃🏃
Lol @ atheist.
He said to me, we were never in a relationship, we were just having fun. People don't date that way.
This one crowns it. 😂😂😂
I loved a rapper who sang a break up song and he told me to listen to the words of the song, '....I'm not loving you, the way I wanted to...where I want to go, I don't need you'. Dude was low-key dating my classmate who we used to laugh at together. Babe broke his heart silly - I was over joyed.
Lets fast and pray for 2weeks yo hear Gods voice about usMc pinky
I feel I'm going to hurt you because I'm not good enough for you
Stopped* or will just stop*
I have used that line before but the babe refused to let go oo
Anon 14:01 no mind d idiot..oversabi
2months after my mum death, guy was like....i like you enough but you are just who you are, and 6yrs later, called me to introduce him to my mum's friend that could help him in something. Bastard! I KNOW WHO I AM!
Hahahaha! Grammarian Ideato! Wetin come happen? Hehehe
@Swag Lafresh, she doesn't know how to respect personal space and I will teach her very soon since she likes trouble.Her friends had better warn her because the next time she tries me it won't be funny.
Silence......worse of them all.
@mind are u okay?
Litter of kids? Anon 14:26 you're sick in the head
@ Ideato... Its I'mIti mpataka
I got another chick pregnant & we are getting married
End Time Gangster
Yes! It actually does! Hate is all over you!
Funny enough i dont have break up lines, the r/ship just ends like that. It sadens me😢😢
mine was 'for now, for now, lets stay apart' and i was secretly hoping he will come back till now. almost one year, he immediately stopped picking calls.
That ur ex is very stupid and childish
LMAOThis cracked me up😂U didn't even say "Snack vendor"😂😂😂😂LMAO @ puff-puff seller
😂And this works all the time cos I have heard stories.
😂😂😂😂This is bad-ass!Hahahhahaha
Do u have stitches on that ur head? To show for ur savagery.
Smart chick👌Me likely.
You are not good for me, I've found someone else.
My dear doppelganger, stop reading unnecessary meanings to statement. I only made an innocent enquiry.
Yes o..too many fish in the river for me to be crying over one loser. I just delete his name from my memory and move on or enjoy my singlehood.
Hahahahahaha...nigga is a clown
I've used that line on a guy but the guy join me dey do fasting and prayers to settle non existing demons o..had to change my location and number.
Give me your address, I will make you fall inlove and break your yeye heart.
Thunder fire he head...chai
I love you...karma is a bad bitch
Mine was... i jst reconciled wit my ex gf i need u to lay low for awhile let me sort tins out wit her
Do u know how many people u corrected up there? one would have thought ure a perfect grammarian.. now table ha turned and u wanna refuse correction.. ure foolishness beats my imagination.. shame leave u catch me.. Oponu
Who's this anonymous troll? Better get a JOB fast, it's "17.
Stella bring back the former couch because I am not understanding this green couch ooo lol
Mine was....You are like a sister to me
"My pastor does not want me to marry a non church staff... So either we split, or i resign for my job or we wait till infinity until he approves" ....these are in his words... now i look at pastor's boy or mama's boy with side eyes
After hot sex in d morning,my ex hubby said he need his space after 10yrs of courtship,3years of married together
Gangster, chop knuckle! U must be my long lost twin!
M good dear. And trust u are too. Oh no! @ SouljaGal***He did that At ur lowest? Sorry dear.But I'm LMAO @ Bastard! I KNOW WHO I AM!😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Lol. Lafresh ur head dey dere.
... He said we are not compatible because I gave him tips on how to dress better and that I didn't wash his clothes so i'm not a homely enough... lol
it's not u, it's me...my standards&expectations are unrealistic but you have a sweet soul and may God grant u your heart desires
I need to face my life, job and relationship was still thinking the relationship part was me....my friend called few days later that his courtship was announced in the church...Godwin Denedo I don forgive u o
Stella which just d couch be this now. We want change of but no be this kind.
After my stupid ex said their family prophet said if he marries me, I'll kill him...he came back and wanted to resume relationship. I told him it's like he's ready to die. Mumu.
I need to marry a career woman
I can so relate to this. He said it twice in the beginning of the fship. It hurt so bad I cried inside. But I pulled myself together and friend zoned him, only for him to come back complaining that I don't give talk to him anymore. Omo I was confused had to ask if I was missing something. So told him I can't deal with it, have to move on. He refused to let me go.3x I tried to break it off cuz he obviously had a girl in his life. The guy no gree so i decided to friendzone him in my mind and prolly do hookups if the need arises.
wow * mouth wide open*
haaaaaa .......this one is epic
abeg shift for me, i carry boli and groundnut come
you need to work on your self esteem
serves him right
he ia a fool
haba are you complaining
He told me he got someone else pregnant and had to live up to his responsibilities. Found out later the baby was not his after getting married to her....
"My pastor does not want me to marry a non church staff" .. thats the breakup line ex used for me. LOL
Ermmmm... funny lines
Kai! God have mercy..This is so my line...'I just want to be more spirit filled and move closer to God'
Heartless.Just pray make dt demon no affect ur loved one.Nanzenz! Shiorrrr!*rolls eyes and hisssssssss*
All of you laughing at Ideato don't know the meaning if the term "present continuous tense" abi? Na wa.
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