Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative...

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Friday, 18 August 2017

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative...

Hmmmm....





STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
COMPLICATED AFFAIR

Good day,

Please kindly keep me anonymous. I need to hear the views of others on this situation.

I am 26 years old... I met a guy two years ago through a mutual friend, we were in different states but talked on phone and chats.

We liked each other...or so it seemed. I liked him more though. I'm Igbo, he is from Bauchi and in the Military.

Fast forward to months later, after waiting to see each other to no avail due to his job, I had started taking my mind off him cause he appeared unserious. 

Out of the blues one day, he came to see me at my base...and for him, felt like true love at first sight. Since the first day we met till now, I have not doubted that he really loves me...but I'm not so sure of my feelings for him anymore.


Main problem now, he asked that he would like to marry me, about a year ago...I told him its not going to be possible after a lot of thinking. Reasons being that my parents, my mum especially would never let me marry a man from Bauchi state and then his job. 


My job would keep me away from home almost all day, to couple that with a man that's not home for weeks, that seemed a lot.

He left, got connected to a girl from his hometown, got engaged to her but we still kept in touch...cause we are friends.

Recently, I had problems with my last relationship, and after sharing my frustrations with him, this guy seriously wants to come back.

What do I do now? I know my mother's opinion about a Bauchi man would never change... I can't even tell for sure how I feel about marriage to this guy...and I have told him severally that I Dont think marriage is possible for both of us...
But he still insists on us trying to work things out, says he is ready to sacrifice us so we both can be together! And his proposed wedding date to his fiancee is this December...

What do I do? He keeps saying I'm holding him back from making a decision!


*why should your mum dictate your future?Do you want to marry this man or not is the question!
He proposed a year ago and you said NO and now he is back again and is ready to call off his approaching wedding to marry you?And now you are confused?
My friend if you want to marry this man go ahead


69 comments:

BLOGBRITY said...

My dear, do not consider this dude because you feel a proposal is passing you by. Your own man will locate you soon.

Be prayerful and keep yourself.

I'm over the moon at the moment
My testimony is here

I am the queen and the boss of this blog(CHIEF) said...

So my Igbo sister didn't see any man from the east or even south to marry na aboki onye army from Bauchi!...
Nne spit out biko...
Say God forbid!!...
Oya start rejecting him!,..
It's better you stay single than to marry a violent military man from the north!...
Tueh

Anonymous said...

He has fixed his wedding date for December. You are not sure if you love him. Your mom will not agree.
So why try what you can't swallow?

Yori Yori Princess Loveme Jeje said...

Confused poster so you want Bauchi man to leave his woman for you. I wish the woman na hausa make she show you pepper.

Better go and look for another man.

Anyway nothing concern me self. Make i come waka

DoppelgΓ€nger said...

People concern themselves with what others will think or feel about their personal struggles and life choices when truly no one cares or will ever go through your pain or Joy with you.
There is an adage that says, "what you won't eat, don't smell it". You already know your mother won't allow you marry a northerner not just someone from Bauchi but you led him on and now you're trying to ruin his life by still leading him on with your indecisiveness. Please if you know you can't win your mum's approval to marry this man then tell him and let him know before he'd break one girls heart for yours only to not even win it. Don't let him lose both ways, that will be very wicked of you. Say No and mean it, stop talking from both sides of the month. Imagine, roles are reversed and a man is treating you this way. How would you feel? Let this man go and find the man your mother would approve of in front.
Note that marriage is more than marrying someone that meets the approvals of family and friends, it's about you and the person you want to marry. Is he a good man? Does he love you? Does he love your people and accept them? Does he care for you and your family? Will he stand by you through good or bad times? That is what marriage is. God forbid you marry someone your mother wants and he doesn't make you happy? Be selfish about the things that make you happy.

Anonymous said...

Oloshi leave the confused man alone. You waited for him to engage another girl before considering it strongly. Would you be happy if your fiancΓ© leaves you 4 months to your wedding??? Is he the only man in the world??? Of cos Bauchi people won't even accept a biafran so go and find your own man and leave someone's husband-to-be alone.

Chike TEFLON said...

Poster your problem is your break up. You want to use him to fill in an empty space in your heart and you truly know that you don't want him. Welu ile gi guo Eze gi onu maka mgbe eji ekwu Ana eteka.

You have the answer to your Chronicle.

Sharon Aminu said...

Really
U want to marry aboki??
Is he a Muslim??
Will his family accept u??
Will he marry more wives??
Marriage is a deep thing, u are from different tribes and culture..
Were will u guys base after marriage,? u are just 26 pls take u time and think about it very well.

The Lifted said...

This girl you are just playing the backnforth game.
I can see he's not your idea of Prince charming that is why you are giving him a hard time. Plus you know your parents won't approve of him but you also know if you want him they will give in to your demand.
I believe its all in your hands. Make your choice ,pray abt this if u are confused .

DaDiva said...

If you're having a cold feet about marrying him,let it go,maybe he's not d one. I don't think you're having a 2nd thought cos of your mum, u are having a 2nd thought actually cos u don't seem to love him enuf to marry him cos he is in d military.

It amazes me how some ppl seek d opinion of others in marriage, deep down your heart u knw what you want,you knw if he's good for u,what bvs say or think won't change anything. Follow your heart,if you think you love him enuf for marriage, relate with your mum and see what she has to say first. Above all,pray about it.

Anonymous said...

You are very confused,if u want to marry him marry na,if your mind is not there leave him alone,because of u he wants to break someone's heart,u are very selfish u better leave him for his fiancee and find your own man because it is obvious u dont love him,u just want to marry,leave him for d girl that loves him biko.

Mrs.R SDK blog Official BFF said...

Poster you are a selfish and self-centered person!
So, you friendzoned him so that you can have someone to turn back to.

You know even without your mother getting involved; that your marriage to this guy will not last due to the nature of your jobs. But, you don't like or want to accept the bitter truth. Rather you want him to break another woman's heart for your sake. Someone that you said NO to before has suddenly become the person of interest to you
You are not even sure of what you really want.

You care only about yourself, have you given it a thought what will happen to the other woman? How will she feel if the guy finally called off the marriage plans just because of you.

The reason I hate the idea of keeping an ex as friend, someone always pay the price at the end of the day.

Please, tell the guy it will not work between you two, tell him to go ahead and marry his fiancee. And also cut every means of communication with him.

You will find your own!

Chidinma Grace said...

It's your decision to make. Stop using your parents as an excuse. You cannot assume that your mum won't accept him when you haven't bring him home yet.

Anonymous said...

U want marry mallam...Odiegwu oh

Anonymous said...

Aboki, gimmi boska there. Sidechick by force

Rocky said...

Women that go for military men are the strongest! I'm out

covfefe said...

Of course u are holding him back,it is clear that u don't love him enough to marry him,apart from you mum's refusal. So pls leave him alone let him go ahead with his wedding,u will find ur own man.

Anonymous said...

Obviously u don't love this man enough to marry him,please let him be,he proposed a year ago u refused so because ur New relationship didn't work u remembered him.How would u feel if u were his fiancee that he wants to end things with because of u.

DaDiva said...

Lol..queen Don show. Where ve u been?

SANDY YO said...

Lool! Chief chief! Ole otu imere?

Bheem said...

Don't do it. With all the hate speech(es) flying around u still want to die there. i grew up in the north and let me tell u something, they hold the igbos with so much hate and contempt. A man may give up everything during courtship but the real him rears its head after marriage. Do you think those suffering from any form of marital woes were never 'so much in love' during courtship. Just cut him loose cos our ideology and theirs are different when it comes to marriage. Both men and women from that part of the country can marry as often as they desire. Can you do same?

Jasmine said...

Hahahahahahaha. It's better she stays single? This woman!!!

But seriously, BAUCHI???

Jasmine said...

My problem with the poster is her leading the young man on.

U knew from the onset and continued fooling the guy.


Mtchewww

SANDY YO said...

Its not what you think. They dare not lay their hands on their wives no matter.

Ada Aguiyi said...

Queen, when the Igbo brothers are feeling like gods, you just have to jide nke iji aka.
Poster, you don't really know what you want. I suggest you free that guy biko.

Chike TEFLON said...

Ele Ele ooo.
Queen and Boss aka CHIEF ayola.
Agu Nwanyi olee way?
Kedu ife afia iwetere na njem imere?
Anya gi emelam nke ukuu.
Nnoo nwanyi oma eji anya isi.
Izuru ka eme Nwa oma. πŸ™ŒπŸ™ŒπŸ™ŒπŸ™Œ

Chike TEFLON said...

Congrats.
Share the testimony with us.

Chike TEFLON said...

Yori Yori Nwa biko what happened to your tea and telemundo???
Biko answer a curious BV

Chike TEFLON said...

Biko help me ask her ooo.

Chike TEFLON said...

Poster biko bikonu bikozianu nye onye AMU-Soldier otu ka olaa, ka ahu juo gi oyi ma jukwa ya oyi nke oma, inugo?

Anonymous said...

Girl idi sure na I bu nwa AFO IGBO!!!! Onye Hausa kwa? Na wa for u ooooooo....

Anonymous said...

Biko Ibu kwa one Igbo anyi??? GI na onye ugu na Ala otu papa!!!! bu pu aso!!! ''Spits''

Laeffizy said...

You Dont know what you want. If you make up your mind come back and let us know.

BTW military men are one of the kindest to date.

Anonymous said...

Oh,,,, Linda were have you been? I missed you and your insight so much, don't ever do that again! Hahahah. Welcome back correct woman.

Anonymous said...

Poster you know in your heart, you don't love this man, marriage without love is hell! You see him as your "plan C" because you feel you are getting older and must settle down... Please let him go back to his wife to be... Put your self in that girl's shoes and tell me how you will feel if your husband to be leave you for another girl.. Please do the right thing and let that man go, God will bring your own Man but he is not this one.



@just Bella.

Anonymous said...

Dont mind the desperado poster, shes considering him now because no serious guy is looking her But. .

Anonymous said...

I just want to ask u, if u didnt brk up, would u have reconsider him? if the answer is yes, den u dont love him it just becos of ur brk up. and two my dear, if u knw u wont be home to take care of ur kids, dont just go for military cos u will be d father, mother,house keeper, plumber, electrician in ur home. if u knw u cant stay without ur husband, dont bother and also if u r a jealous type dat always on their husband neck, dont bother marrying a military man and if take offense if ur husband keeps gal friends, Dont bother marrying one. U SEE A HE WAN SET TO MARRY ANOTHER AND STILL DISTURBING U, DAT IS HOW THEY R. WILL DO SAME IF HE MARRYS U. TALKING AN OFFICERS DAUTHER.If u r not strong and independent, pls stay away

Okwesilieze said...

Lol
I missed you TQAB. Where have you been...welcome back

Chikito The Professional Fire for Fire a.k.a 'Anike' πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ said...

Da quueeeeeeeeeenn!!πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ where have you been nau?

Chikito The Professional Fire for Fire a.k.a 'Anike' πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ said...

Thanks for writing in my behalf my dear. Indeed we are 'one'πŸ˜‚

Oya come and interpret that thing you wrote in igbo.bikonu

Michael Teko said...

Your heart tells u to accept him, but ur head says don't. My dear your head knows if u marry him you will not be happy. Proposal is not marriage, after marriage and in the future he might consider marrying a second wife. Trust the Northerners...one man one wife is not their thing.

Lipstickalley said...

Stella, stop posting this type of chronicle.

I wasn't this confused @ 26, truth be told cos time still dey.

Poster you better face your work and leave that military dude, you want him to cancel his engagement only for you to break his πŸ’”πŸ’”???? 😠😠😠😠

Where is that recession thunder when you need it. Mscheww

jelly said...

Follow your heart

creamy crystal said...

Was seriously looking out for this reply.thank God you didn't disappoint.like seriously?Bauchi?and then military?buy all u will ever need for your funeral before embarking on this mission to nowhere

Chike TEFLON said...

The Igbo part means
That she should use her hand and advise herself to avoid coming back here to give us another Chronicle.

The meaning of the 2nd Igbo part of my reply to my main comment is that
She should give the soldier tohtoh to fuck so that their bodies will come down and their feelings will disappear. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚


Ugegbe m we are one
ChikiChi2017

Anonymous said...

Gbam! Leave another woman's man alone!! The only reason you're considering him now is because your own relationship after him didn't work out. So you want to ruin another woman's happiness just because you yourself are not happy? How are you even sure he's not leading you on now to put you through exactly what you put him through before when you led him on knowing you couldn't marry him because of your mother etc? Or you think someone from Bauchi will cancel the wedding with a girl from his place that all his people have been preparing for only to bring an Igbo girl as the one he now wants to marry? Just couple of months to the planned wedding? You think they'll accept you? They've either never heard of you before and so would find the idea of you ridiculous, they would not accept you over the "wife they've been looking forward to marry in a few months; or they've heard of you and also of how you led their son on but then rejected him because your people won't accept him. Either way, you would be bad news to them. Don't kid yourself and look for your own man! ..... a word is enough o!

Chike TEFLON said...

Okwa onye awusa ebiyi ugwu for that matter oooo. Otu Ana ako ya oko ka etere ya agbara.

Na Me Talk Am!!! said...

Welcome back Chief

2muchjuice|2muchsauce said...

Poster LET HIM GO!!.Am talking from experience. I dont want to say that's the reason am still single but I have sought forgiveness from him and My God..Please allow him to marry that girl and you too should know what you want cos u are no longer a baby..I was 22 then yes very naive..Deep down inside of me, I knew I will not marry him but kept leading this man on till he broke off with the lady he intended to marry, only for me to tell him NO at the end of the day, I dunno if he has made any utterances which I know he must have done..Well I know God will help me in the area of a life partner..This happened 6 years ago!!

Forget what your mother is saying, its you..You aint sure of yourself , allow him go and dont allow the tears of lady he wants to marry haunt you if it doesnt happen..This story I shared is real and not fabricated..You will get your own man..A word is enuff for the wise.. I would advise you sever all communications with him so you can be saner enuff to attract the right man in your life..Please LET HIM GO!!

Chidiogo said...

Queen Queen! Your comment just made me smile for the first time today. Kai! You no dey disappoint. Nne m i si bauchi? Biko gbawakwa, aka m adiro ya.

Anonymous said...

Welcome back from Enugu village where there is no internet

Anonymous said...

Side chic wants to turn to wife by force. Please don't tell me he met you 1st. This guy has always had a girl or girls from his place. You are just a vagina to him. He won't even risk cancelling his wedding or presenting you to his people cos they will never accept you

Chikito The Professional Fire for Fire a.k.a 'Anike' πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ said...

Ewwwww.....chike 😣 there are 'cleaner' ways of describing a woman's vagina 😐

Chikito The Professional Fire for Fire a.k.a 'Anike' πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ said...

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ @recession thunder. How are you @lipstickie 😚

Cherry topaz said...

Did she state that he's a Muslim or are you forgetting that there are hausa Christians?

Cutekay said...

Your mum won't let you marry the bauchi guy so why exactly are you leading him on? Your relationship hit the rocks and you want to spoil his. Do you even think you're a good person as you're there so? Because both of you are friends then his relationship must scatter cause you couldn't keep yours. You're asking for advice expecting us to tell you to go after true love. If it was true love on his side he wouldn't be getting married to another person. And if your own relationship hadn't ended will you be this indecisive?? Imagine someone doing same to you. Oh sorry you won't imagine.... You already know you're out to destroy his own relationship.

Cutekay said...

Your mum won't let you marry the bauchi guy so why exactly are you leading him on? Your relationship hit the rocks and you want to spoil his. Do you even think you're a good person as you're there so? Because both of you are friends then his relationship must scatter cause you couldn't keep yours. You're asking for advice expecting us to tell you to go after true love. If it was true love on his side he wouldn't be getting married to another person. And if your own relationship hadn't ended will you be this indecisive?? Imagine someone doing same to you. Oh sorry you won't imagine.... You already know you're out to destroy his own relationship

VICTORIOUS EHIS said...

Congrats Blogbrity ...oya share let's hear n join d celebration train

Push up said...

Why snatch someone's man, why cause another woman pain when you are not sure of the marriage sef, what if all your fears of the future happens sheybe we can call it karma, don't go and look for your own man. Who told you you are the only woma he is telling this story

Anonymous said...

you want to break another girls heart by stopping her marriage because of a guy that your famil will never let you marry? Use your brain. No ibo supports marrying muslim or northerner

Anonymous said...

Oh shit. Guess I should be careful what i ask for! Hi Linda crazy chic!

sholetoga said...

Poster.....follow your heart. I can't shout

Anonymous said...

WHY do people start what tbey cannot finish? Why go into a relationship knowing fully well that you have parents who insist you must marry from your place? you string a man along in a stupid relationship leading to where exactly? cos now he proposed and you said no so why date someone you won't boldly settle down with? When you turn 40 now you will start visiting MFM church because you fooled around in your youth. Ode have you even our your do it down at home and it so called parents did not buldge? you did t even fight for him. dey there dey use husband take do boyfriend later I go know

Jeni_zee said...

He is just using those stories to sleep with her for free, he won't cancel his wedding for u

Lipstickalley said...

Pepperoni, I am cool like that. No mind that poster

eniola olatunde said...

Marriage should be a lifelong relationship and thank God you are considering your options. May I advise you check the relationship first before thinking of what your parents will say.
1.. Are you emotionally and psychologically ready for the peculiar challenges associated with inter tribal marriages?
2.. If you love him enough; are you sure his love is deep enough?
3.. what drives him? I mean his values as per family, money , responsibilities of a man etc
4... What does he really think about polygamy, marital infidelity and how to treat a woman?
5... How does he see women that work et all?
Do not sacrifice a possible loving marriage on the small excuse of parental consent. If you work out your relationship, you can get your parents on board the marriage and moreover it will be a good acid test on the commitment of the man. If he really loves you he will persist in looking for a way to win your mom over.
I wish you all the best in ur decision.

Anonymous said...

@Doppelganger you have a fan in me.
Good reply.πŸ˜™πŸ˜™πŸ˜™πŸ˜™πŸ˜™



Aydagreat

White Eagle said...

@Doppleganger, I don't even need to type a long epistle. You have said it all.

Anonymous said...

She means strong coz military men are always away, when u marry them u have to be man and Woman at the same time. U have to be strong physically, financially, emotionally. When they cheat, can you handle it. You give birth your husband is not around...stuffs like that

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