Stella Dimoko Veteran Actress Rachel Oniga Speaks On Her Failed Marriage And Her Regrets..


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Sunday, 5 November 2017

Veteran Actress Rachel Oniga Speaks On Her Failed Marriage And Her Regrets..

In an interview with Punch, the veteran actress talked about her failed marriage and how she regrets not settling her marital issues before her husband passed on;

My first born, Olamide, was four years old when I left my marriage. I had to put them all in boarding schools. That is one of the most painful things I have had to do. Whenever I talk about this, it always brings me close to tears. My children paid the price for something they knew nothing about. 

Children don’t beg parents to have them; we ask them to come to the world, so we should be able to take good care of them. It is not all about money, but I had no choice. I had to work; I had to be a mother and a father to them. I had to make sure that they had all they needed to have. While they were in school, they didn’t lack anything. I got them all the things rich children had. I understand all I did was not enough, but I thank God for the children He blessed me with. I think God knew I had nobody but Him. In a way, he saw us through and I thank Him for that.

The factor (her late husband married another woman) that led to the end of my marriage made me determined to prove to him (ex-husband) that I could stand without any man. I was not ready to give any other man the chance to be a hindrance to my children and me. I also made up my mind that I would dedicate my life totally to my children. I toughened my heart and blocked every opportunity to go into any relationship. I saw myself as equal to any man, regardless of how much money he might have. I give God the glory because I can pay my bills. I dedicated all my life to my job and my children. I became so busy and I was not ready to take any nonsense from men.

I was always on the defensive. I didn’t want any man to treat my children badly. I was working for my money and I put my kids in good schools. So, what do I need a man for? I felt all men just wanted was to see the beauty of a woman and walk away. With what my ex-husband did to me, you expect me to trust men again? Before we got separated, he was a good and ideal man. But he married another woman and I moved on.

 I do not regret leaving him because I sacrificed my life for my children, which makes me fulfilled and happy. But I miss the whole union thing, friendship and sharing things together. I have missed it all. My advice to young ladies is to keep and fight for their marriages. Perhaps, I was naΓ―ve; I never fought for what was mine, but I still thank God. We are in Africa, you fight for your life and that of your children first. Maybe that is why God has been merciful to me and my children.

There were many failed attempts. He knew the type of person I am; that when I say no, it is no. I tell people that I am like a coin with two faces. I could be stupid and forgiving. In fact, I don’t think there is anyone who forgives as much as I do; I am yet to meet such person. I could forgive or ignore anything, but once I turn my back, I would not go back there. Before death took him (ex-husband) away, he called many times and he came to the house to see his children. Once he arrived, I would pick up my bag and head to movie sets. I didn’t stop him from seeing his children though.

It was my mistake. I should have fought for it. Any young lady must try her best and fight for her marriage. My decision at that time might not have been the best, but I still thank God. I have my regrets too as a human being.

When I make up my mind, I don’t regret it. Even if I am meeting a person for the first time, I would be so open. I am very sincere. You may betray my trust many times and I will ignore all. But once my mind is made up about you, there is nothing anyone can do to convince me otherwise.

I participated in his burial with all I had. I spent my money, energy and I even invited artistes. When he passed on, I was in America for holidays, so, I couldn’t attend the eighth-day prayers (fidau). But the children did and my late elder sister was there too. For the next 40 days, I was supportive. Though he married another wife, his family still sees me as the legal wife. I was still legally married to him as of the time he died. I gave him a befitting burial. I did all that because of my children, especially my son. Later in life, people may ask him how they buried his father. He had to bury his father well and that was exactly what I did for him. I played the part my son would have played if he was an adult. That is my joy. Sometimes, I do things and people wonder what is wrong with me, but I always have my reasons.

*Na wah...So she walked away because he married a second wife ?Was he not a Muslim?



Only God knows the circumstance that led to her walking away from her marriage.
Failed promises? Lost of interest in her? Love gone sour? Whatever.

Thank God she was able to take care of herself and kids and raise them well.

Once a woman can stand firm on her feet with or without her husband and hold her own well, everyother thing na jara.

Olivia Silk said...

Not every fight is worth fighting for ooo before you long sufferers will be encouraged by her statement.

SANDY YO said...

Tough momma!!!πŸ™Œ Used to like any movie she features in those days. Talks with authority and so undaunted.

Anonymous said...

Lol.... Some women don't like their man marrying another woman... Muslim women especially hates their husband marrying a second wife... Na the thing wen start @Banbangida son wahala be that with him first wife wen be @Indinmi daughter

And I ask myself, if you are a Muslim lady, you should expect your husband to take another wife,i hear is the FIVE PILLARS OF ISLAM.... and also if you are married to a Muslim man, you should know he will marry a second wife

I love you @Oniga.. Love your acting as well... That movie with @Saint Obi "OH MAMA "...I love am die.





Eyaaaa what a moving truthful interview.
Women go through alot in marriage.
The worst thing a woman can do is marry the wrong man. It changes the course of your life.

Chidinma Grace said...

Someone like me can't marry a Muslim man because I don't like sharing. Good thing she can afford to take care of her kids on her own.

MrsB said...


Cynthia Iyede said...

Muslim or not, no woman likes competition or a rival, those supporting it are just not truthful with their feelings.

I love her on screen. Mama no nonsense.

Chika Vincent said...

Awww, Ayeahhh.


I so much like that movie, but i think the title is 'Take me to Mama'.

Anonymous said...

So mama is telling us nobody has serviced her poryon since she left her hubby, hmm OK now

St.FranKooL.... said...

#You get there by realizing you are already there*

Anonymous said...

Loads of ignorance spilled in your comment here. You HEARD it is the five pillars of Islam. Does that make sense to you? Why didn’t you bother to verify instead of relying on the ignorant thing you heard? And how many Muslim men have you seen married to a second wife that you are saying a woman should expect her man to marry a second?
Load up your ignorance and garnish it with flavoured silliness whenever you comment. It makes you complete as an anonymous Orubebe.

Anonymous said...

How did the man wrong her? Do you know what went wrong inside the marriage? You only heard her side of it. And besides, her expression here give the thought of her mistakes in the marriage as well. She proved stubborn and she acknowledged it

Anonymous said...

You put your children thru unnecessary hardship just b/c u want to prove your selfishness.

Anonymous said...

But you can date men with 200 side chicks right?

Anonymous said...

Unfortunately instead of you to educate her you just spewed some garnish on top of her silliness.
You’re no better anonymouse.

Anonymous said...

Haven't you seen men that start maltreating their first wife cuz they have a second?

What if the environment was toxic?

What if she was trying to protect her children from harm? Who knows the kind of person the second wife was? Those days most men didn't have the sense to put their wives in different apartment, some of them had 4 wives living under the same roof, radarada.

Nobody should judge her.

Anonymous said...

My dear thank you.

Jeni_zee said...


Anonymous said...

Stella being a muslim does not give you an automatic right to marry more than one wife. The full verse says "you can marry, 1,2,3 up to 4 provided you can be just and treat them equally, but 1 is best if you know what is good for you". To be honest, no human can love others equally.

Love.Eating.Pussy said...

Well its hard to share ones husband whether Muslim or not. Plus would the home have ever been the same with a new woman in it.

I like that she made her choice and stuck to it and made the best out of her situation.

I love her movie roles alot and can't wait to see her in more movies.


Anonymous said...

Same thing my dad did and my mum left over 15years now

Amacastel said...

Me too besides there's lots difference btw dating & marriage.

Anonymous said...

Anon 15:50, you are too bitter. Look for an anoki, buy 1 cup of honey, take it home. Then get spoon, open your mouth, i say open it slowly, ok. Then gently pour in the spoon some honey and lift gently on to your lips. Ok! Anu mpama someborry!!! If you wanna correct someone, do it with a a tiny home training. Inugo!!

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