HUH?......EXCUSE ME?
NARRATIVE NUMBER ONE.
ENGAGED BUT IN LOVE WITH ANOTHER.
Hello Stella...great job you doing seriously..God bless you big.
My issue is kind of complex, AND YOU CAUSED IT.
I am in a relationship with a great lady, and i love her to bits. We are kind of in a long distance relationship though because she’s in school, private university with no access to phones so we don’t get to talk like that, which makes me lonely a lot of times, but i have been faithful as much as i can.
However, during one of those singles mingle posts, i decided to give anonymous online friendship a try, and i got few friends, most disappeared on hearing i just want friends except one. We became friends, and she’s also in a very serious relationship. We became friends, then subsequently became very close to the point that we became very fond of each other, a day can’t pass without us speaking or chatting in d morning and till bed..
It went on like that till the point when it was obvious we had both fallen in love... We agreed that we won’t see each other until her wedding day, sometimes next year by God’s grace. This will even deprive one of us from going to the lagos sdk party.
It went on like that till the point when it was obvious we had both fallen in love... We agreed that we won’t see each other until her wedding day, sometimes next year by God’s grace. This will even deprive one of us from going to the lagos sdk party.
The weird part is that we still respect each other’s relationship and look out for ourselves in that aspect. We decided to take no.2 spot in each other’s love life, i.e. am her assistant fiancé, and she’s my assistant fiancée too. Please how safe is this new found love, especially because we don’t think we are ready to do away with each other, and we also love our partners dearly too.
NB: She’s aware of this post...Infact she perused it before i sent it to you.
Hmmmmmmm.....Do you both really know what love is?Love will burn you from a sitting position to standing up,love will embarrass your mouth from keeping mute till you shout out.
You are both doing what you are doing with clear eyes,all premeditated so please dont tell me about love.
Na to shine congo dey hungry una so make una no call my name put inside.
Proclaiming email love when you can both meet and shake hands at paint Lagos SDK....lol
.............................................................................................................
NARRATIVE NUMBER TWO
KNOWING THE GREEN AND RED LIGHT ALERT.
He is a negatively jealous boo,this might progress further positively or negatively..it depends on if you want to hang around with someone who displays such childish tendencies.
Most men with this attitude progress later into landing heavy blows and side upper cuts when trust issues come up.
Can you deal with living with a man like this?
Are you one of those who will be able to keep it sailing when the storm comes?
if not,wear your running shoes and jump the roof.
Hmmmmmmm.....Do you both really know what love is?Love will burn you from a sitting position to standing up,love will embarrass your mouth from keeping mute till you shout out.
You are both doing what you are doing with clear eyes,all premeditated so please dont tell me about love.
Na to shine congo dey hungry una so make una no call my name put inside.
Proclaiming email love when you can both meet and shake hands at paint Lagos SDK....lol
.............................................................................................................
NARRATIVE NUMBER TWO
KNOWING THE GREEN AND RED LIGHT ALERT.
Stella, long time. Thank you for this great medium for I know blog visitors will help me with reasonable answers to my confusing thought. Straight to my matter.
I met this guy recently and things have been going well,we don't stay in the same country but we are from the same town and we both know each other's family. But i noticed that anytime we have an issue and he gets angry, he will go blank on me; stop communication, won't pick my calls.
Today's incident really got me, Stella. My guy kept reading my chat but won't reply, ignored my calls or reply my SMS. All because i said i was going to another city but my plans changed because i got a call for an impromptu interview. and even removed my picture from his dp and later deleted me. Not until i showed him a munch screen of the interview message and the time and the one showing when i told him about the trip.
I'm trying to cut the story short, i know I'm not perfect and no one is too. And i don't want age to determine my life. And I can't be part of this blog and still miss it. It will be an insult to Stella and other blog visitors who shared their experience so that some of us won't miss it maritally.
Please my people, especially the married women in the house. Help a sister in need. Is this one of the little signs we talk about that's suppose to show us the door, make us put on the running shoes or just one of those issues to weather off.
He is a negatively jealous boo,this might progress further positively or negatively..it depends on if you want to hang around with someone who displays such childish tendencies.
Most men with this attitude progress later into landing heavy blows and side upper cuts when trust issues come up.
Can you deal with living with a man like this?
Are you one of those who will be able to keep it sailing when the storm comes?
if not,wear your running shoes and jump the roof.
Proclaiming email love when you can both meet and shake hands at paint Lagos SDK....
ReplyDeleteLmfao
Poster is dying with fire.
This Stella's meeting and shaking hands is what I don't understand. Lol
DeleteYou people shouldn't meet oo, abeg.
Hahahhahahhahahhahahhahhahahahhhahahahhahahahahahahaahahahhhahahhahahahahahahahahahhahhahhahahahahahahahah heavy blows/side upper cut..
DeleteI'm here to read comments
@SHB
Poster 1, two of. Una no well. Inukwa assistant fiance & fiancee. MtchewW
DeletePlaying
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeletePoster one, na mad dey worry you or na craze dey worry you? You are the causer of whatever you are in now.
ReplyDeletePoster two : ignore him as well. If he isn't bothered and can live with the ignorance then take a walk. You can't always be the one anxious for peace all the time.
Poster one, just know DAT once u become used to something, den be ready to be addicted to it. Two of u re becoming used to each other. D best thing z for u two to lose contact, if u dont want any regret.
DeletePoster two, if u want a marriage where there ll be always any small, ur hubby ll go on "silence" mood, den go ahead. If not find ur square root.
P1 u guys should just fuck and una eye go clear! Simple..stop deceiving urselves with assistant fiance or kpiancee just fuck d fuck, inugo?
ReplyDeleteP2 ur man is a child,
If u can stomach his petty attitude fine, if u can't endure. It,lookk for a spare.
Lol no be small assistance fiance/fiancee nonsense, d moment dey nack now their eye go clear, yeye dey smell.
Delete@2, is really not easy to date a very jealous lover, they nag too much and they don't know how to trust, if u cant manage he's childish behavior take a walk.
Not even Assistant BF/GF
DeleteFianceeeeeeeee????
Yes poster1 what u guys need is just sex just fuck and be free from your worries.
DeletePorter 2 abeg I can't deal with such a person.
Nawa for poster one ooo.una two no well at all. Abegii poster two,fashi the guy oo before u go dey emotionally hurt.
ReplyDeleteP1, I don't think you guys are in love. I think you feel the way you do bc you have been missing your fiancee and feeling somewhat lonely. You should severe every communication with each other and focus on your rships. If you stay for three months after doing this and realize you can't stay without her, then by all means, try and see each other. Hang out often and see where it leads to. But pls, no sex! I don't believe in boyfriend-girlfriend rship. As long as you're not married yet, that man or woman you're trying not to snatch away might be your life partner. Also pray to God. He knows what's best for you.
DeleteP2, you can go ahead with him if you can live with his jealous and overtly possessive attitude. But this is what I think: men tend to get jealous when they're having low self esteem or when they don't trust their woman, so think of which it is and how best to handle it.
So the babe get fiancé and still participated in SnM
DeleteStella today I love u very much with ur description of what love is... yes o! Love will make u a talkative even when u wana be dumb, love will make u say and do a lot of things, and o yes, love is very peculiar when it's genuine, when u love that person for no reason but for every reason there is... so poster 1, na to shine Congo de worry una two...
ReplyDeletePoster 2, insecurity wcich is also jealousy in any relationship is deadly..... it's worse when it's negative! Na u know wetin u want for ur marriage when d time reach and if u think dis dude isn't helping ur ministry, walk plz....
A little jealousy is healthy, in fact I recommend it but taking things too far by deleting me is what I can't take. That one is jealousy on another level of its own.
DeleteWaiting for comments.
ReplyDeletePoster 2: Please flee. His jealousy will kill you faster than poverty. Run!
ReplyDeleteLemme keep space,Stella don't eat my comment oh
ReplyDeleteJesus fix it *in emjay's voice hehe
DeleteLol @ am her assistant fiancé, and she’s my assistant fiancée too. Abeg make una continue nothing do una jo. una need to get plan B.
ReplyDeleteNarrator 2: your boyfriend is childish. He will be reading your mails and will not reply. Abeg throway that small pikin you call man. He is already jealous of your going up without him.
@poster 1: fairly tale
ReplyDelete@poster2: ur guy is just childish...he's yet to mature ...is he d last born ? Well only u know him too well..u can try and nurture him to maturity. ...lol
Exactly my thought... The guy is either last baby or only baby Hehe
DeleteNarrative number 1 you both are not in love but in lust. By the time una finish shine each other Congo finish una eyes go clear. Love my foot, you don't love two persons at same time.
ReplyDeleteIt's possible. I love my 2sugar daddies equally
DeleteAbeg give me on sugar daddy na,dont be stingy!
DeleteAbeg give me one sugar daddy na,don't be stingy!
DeleteMscheeeeew to both narrative
ReplyDeletethe both of you should go with Stella's writeup
ReplyDelete#GODWIN™
Poster 1
ReplyDeleteU r just horny jor...and since u cant be doing all d lovey dovey with ur boo cs shes in sch, thats why.
2. Stell has said it all.
Haopy weekend y'all
Whos in abj and bored?
MOi
DeletePoster 1 @ ur age u dey deceive urself, u never see who u dey chat with, maybe when u see her ur brain will reset. Small pikin talk. Ehen Poster 2, I hate men like dis ur own, abeg Run jere he no like ur progress.
ReplyDeleteLemme read comments...
ReplyDeleteLol@stella's reply,make una talk say na to shine Congo dey hungry una,abi stella. Assistant my ass,u ve gurld/boyfrnd then wat re u still looking u? Especially d madam dat will be marrying next year,so wat do u call dis luv?
Delete*****LONG LIVE SDK & SDKERS*****
P1: Both of u are treading on dangerous waters. Beware. Do d right thing if u both say u love ur respective fiance(e). Get rid of this ur so called relationship. It's not safe esp when emotions are involved.
DeleteU both are making room for infidelity.
Wisdom is profitable to direct.
P2: Ur man is behaving like a baby. It's an immature behaviour for a man who is going to be d head of d house.
It's left for u to know if u can tolerate this particular attitude of his or not when u both are married and living under d same roof. We all have our shortcomings. So if u can live with it, God's grace my dear, else...
U are looking at the future: will he keep shutting u out like this after every argument or anytime u do something he doesn't like?
It's a childish behavior. Let him be a man and take charge pls.
Choose righteousness
Sex, marriage, family,love, relationships and deep issues pls check out my blog:
www.mitchelleobatu.blogspot.com
Poster 1.you guys just want to straf
ReplyDeleteIt's obvious
Poster2.jealous dude
Can you imagine
Poster 1- Both of you are playing with fire. You both have relationships and you are getting close to each other? na wah oh. However, since both of you are not yet committed to your current partners, I will say from lifes' experience that anything can happen. So go with the flow. And see where it will take you. In this life, its not only one person you can marry and be happy-there are many others who probably will make you happier-you've just got to give them the chance
ReplyDeletePoster 2- The guy is already showing you what stuff he is made of. Don't ignore it.do you like it when he does it to you? Its going to get worse when you start living in with him. When he gets angry, he will shut you out for days and could even not come home. Its almost like hatred for anything that has to do with you all because he is offended. Its a very strong signal. Don't ignore it. And to think of it, Love is gentle. Love is forgiving. This attitude doesn't match up at all
Take your decision.
Thank you very much for ds reply.. my ex bf used to shut me out too whenever we had issues,he wont pick or reply my pings fr 3days.. thats hw it progresses frm shutting you out to comin home late to not comin at all then to cheating, then to hitting cs u wil start irritating him sooner or later and he will blame it on your shortcomings dear.. Move on Nne.
DeleteHahahaha @ upper cut Stella you a bae.
ReplyDeletePoster 1 na fuck dey hungry una two please makeout time to see each other so u can have sex because if it's not sex then u must be insane
ReplyDeleteStella you are so right on poster two and my dear poster please be careful on your decisions
#richbee#
Na wa for Una oooo @poster one!!!
ReplyDeletePoster 1 you guys should forget the guilt of hurting the ones you dating, dahs wah is holding both of you back, go for wah u want ,bros you in particular the gal might agree dah u guys shudnt see ,u might hv suggested it I dnt know buh the truth is she wants to and not just dah she waiting for you to decide wah u want with her•u know women
ReplyDelete2. He's childish. Give him some space to grow up in order to avoid violence in the future.
ReplyDelete1. This one get as e be o. Which on is assistant fiance and fiancee? Abeg don't start what you can't finish. Both of you should move on with your partner jare
Sounds like kola sodiya from canada!
ReplyDelete@poster1 : you too are jobless!
ReplyDeleteSingle mingle again.......we have not gotten over the other snatching dat took place in single mingle
You too should tell yourself the truth.
@poster2 :any time he annoys you, take a walk n see if he will come begging..in dat process, do the exact same thing 2 him n see his reaction.
But will advise you to free him tho.
@poster1 : you too should just be partners in congo shinning naaa.
ReplyDeleteMtcheew
Lmao, this ur "my face d entire time" pix is epic. Lol.
ReplyDeletePoster 1: Both of u should take a break from ur respective partners & date. I'm tired of people being in love & can't date because blah blah blah.It should be about us sometimes. Yes let's put ourselves first. It's a luxury both of u can afford right now. Our happiness should not be compromised. YOLO
ReplyDeletePoster 2: That dude is gon drain u emotionally. Not worth it
Ur head is there!
DeletePoster one
ReplyDeleteBoth of you are not serious... What were you looking for on the SM post in the first place. KMT
Abeggo... I feel so frigging horny. Been a while I've felt this way and I haven't had sex yet oh. And I can't even master bate, tried it once and felt nothing! Man or woman I don't care, I just want to ease my self. Sigh. This is why I have to get married, these thoughts are just evil!
Pls don't "master bate" agn oh....
DeleteMaster bate?
DeleteI wish there is a like button I would have hit the like button where u wrote "what we're they looking for on the SM post. But for the masturbation am totally against that.
Delete@poster 1 am not sure both of u love ur supposed partners if u do, u both won't send in this chronicle, stop deceiving ur partners that u guys love them. U have a serious date and u come here to single and mingle looking for trouble, now u have found one embrace it. Y start what u won't finish? I don't have advice for u both
ReplyDelete@poster 2 ur guy is insecure, he should bring u over to where he is if he wants u around and knowing ur movement. I hope he is very serious and u can deal with his insecurity if not don't waste ur years waiting for someone that wants u trapped indoors and he would be there enjoying his life.
Reading comment mood action activated
ReplyDelete#2, Yes, it is one of the signs.
ReplyDelete#1, severe that friendship asap! It is infatuation.
@SDK don talk am finish
ReplyDelete@Galore
Abeg no jump roof o! She is kidding. @ nN1, u guys shld keep deceiving yourselves o! N Stella I don't get u mehn.. Did u just advice them to hook up?? Hhhmmmmmmm.
ReplyDeleteChronicles
ReplyDeletePoster No 1,
ReplyDeleteWhen it comes to Relationship as we all know communication can be a problem.it deprives you of the Love that is suppose to grow through communicating with each other.
That is why you have developed a feeling towards ur supposed friend.....and vice versa.
Now to your "mutual friend".because she is reading this.......If you are indeed sure you have developed a feeling for him.....Rethink about walking down the aisle with ur fiancé because ur heart can't beat for two.
U er definitely infatuated with one.
You guys should give it a good rethink.....Marriage is not all about saying sweet things to each other on phone n thinking or feeling you are in love......Angel
N1, u guys are just some confused fellow who don't know what love is all about. So u guys wants to be each others side boo? Pathetic n shameful. Pls commot here make we see road, love ke, love ni. N2, pls run, such guys are possessive n as time goes on, dey become abusive. Can u deal when dd abusive aspect starts? If a man loves u, trust shouldn't be a problem bc without trust, dia will always be a quarrel which can lead to abuse.
ReplyDeletePoster 1: u guys just want to eat the forbidden fruit jare. Do it and forget abt him/her.
ReplyDeletePoster 2: cut that guy out of ur life biko. His jealousy will turn to obsession soon
N.2
ReplyDeleteYou are in a relationship with a CHILD. That man is childish as hell! He doesn't trust you, that's a RED light. Tread carefully.
Poster 2,
ReplyDeleteIt's indeed the Door for take off........why is he acting that way to you even in a relationship where he is supposed to be more tolerant because you guys are still dating......and your romance should be hitting off.....
He doesn't love you enough to tolerate your excesses.....someone who truly loves you will not behave or sure anger the way you hv just explained.
You hv not truly swept him off his feet.....so be wise and love someone who doesn't get provoked to the extent he does......u er still on baby steps at d moment for such behaviours.
The first poster got me, is it possible to be in love with two different persons?
ReplyDeletePoster 2: If he's always feeling insecure, please leave him. E go pain, but pain go subside with time.
Poster 1:You both should be ashamed of yourselves. 'Assistant fiance and fiancee' indeed.
ReplyDeleteIt will probably turn to assistant husband and wife, when you both get married to your respective spouses.
Keep cheating online, una hear?
She perused it indeed.
Poster 2: Your man is either childish, insecure or negatively jealous, or all of the above.
You alone, know if you can put up with all that.
Goodluck
#WhiteDiamondOut
poster 2: i'll go with stella's comment to you, exactly what she said about him turning you into a punching bag might actually happen....i am experiencing the same thing with my bf, he has problem trusting me, he can block, delete and go days without talking to me, unless i show him proof of what actually happened. And just 3 days back i received the beating of my life because i refused to allow him go through my phone, and as am typing this my phone is still with him. i love him though and i know he loves me bt not sure i can go on with this anymore, difficult though. dear poster i dont wish u experience same, but pls once you see the signs of him becoming aggressive, then its time to back out..... O.A
ReplyDeleteGo and collect your friggin phone from him woman!!!
DeleteGo with military men if possible! Kai,i wish I can lend you some... No violence,just show up at his door step and make him frog jump! Why the hell will he beat you up?
Young lady,go get that phone.. We don't curr if he bourit!!! And end it all already! He is not in love with you.
Efulefu nwoke!
Please leave that bf of yours and RUN!!!
DeleteI cannot imagine a man putting his hands on me! How do you ladies cope continuing with abusive relationships!!!!! He might kill you one day and trust me he will fuck someone else the next day!!!
Pearl, so sorry. Reminds me of a guy I dated for 4 years too. Beat me up, threatened to kill me and then seized my phone. I recorded the threats. But when I got the phone back. He had formatted the phone. Let an elderly person collect your phone for you. God will heal you.
DeleteP1: Both of you have no respect for your partners. As for the Assistant Fiancee, if you follow this one when you are away for a little or he is bored, he will find an Assistant to the Assistant Fiancee. Don't wake up, be acting silly.
ReplyDeleteP2: What are you waiting for, a man gets angry and blocks you out and you think he is marriage material. Don't worry, if he marries you, you will see the back of your neck and be begging him all the days of your marriage.
Poster 1:
ReplyDeleteGross abuse of S&M post. How is it Stella's fault? You have a relationship and you went there looking for 'platonic friends'. Why na only girls you add? Abi you de forbid to get guy as friend?
I don't support your friendship with her though because if there's one thing I'm very uncomfortable with, it's blurred lines. I like well defined relationships and boundaries, so every one knows where they stand.
Your style may be different though but since you're asking for advice, I think you should define your relationships and stick to boundaries that you can both defend before your significant other's. Can you tell your girl that you have an assistant fiancée? No? Then stop regarding your new friend as such.
Great relationships (and marriages) are so because two people worked to make it great. The plant you water is the one that will grow.
Grow up, be disciplined and stop giving excuses.
Poster 2:
Lack of communication is the cancer of relationships. If you cannot communicate with him anytime you have issues and behaves in a petty way, please leave him.
It's not all adult, financially stable men that are ready to settle down. Maybe he still needs to grow.
Where is my money makes you fuck........jor.tell this P1 the truth
ReplyDeleteI guess the first poster's babe is a Convenant student or one of these church schools that don't allow phones. Abeg Na boredom de worry una. Get busy.
ReplyDeleteSEX... that is both your problems... SEX. You're two horny people looking for monkey sex... don't confuse it with love plz.
ReplyDeleteAssistant fiancé(e) right? What a crock! And we all know how assistants are, right? No one wants to remain an assistant forever, we all know that, abi? Assistants forever eyeing 'Oga's' seat, wondering when that seat will be theirs. Praying, wishing, SCHEMING for 'Oga's' promotion, transfer or even death... anything to get that seat vacant and get them on the 'job'.
Assistants indeed!
Pretending to watch out for your partners when in reality you're watching out for each other and making sure you're keeping yourselves for YOU.
My friends, go to SDK party, meet up and have that monkey sex and let that overblown, overheightened, anticipation-builds-passion mood go!!!
Deceiving yourselves and blaming SDK's Singles and Mingles, she put gun for una head to take part???
Just be warned that this 'assistant' thing is going to backfire and blow up in your faces if you don't cut it loose now.
People using love as an excuse for their craps.
Hope you two will be supportive about your partners having 'assistants too?
This is emotional cheating. Emotional unfaithfulness. Either you let it go or have sex already and pay the price. Nonsense!!!
Assistant fiancé(e) ko, Assistant lover ni.
STORIES @ ALIFEDIARY
Choi! Assistant Fiancé(e) hope you people get to read TM's analysis of your love story...
DeletePoster 2: RUN and keep running. Such an emotional cripple @ your bf. So clingy, juvenile and spiteful. A potential abusive husband in the making... will specialise in emotional abuse.
ReplyDeleteRun o!
STORIES @ ALIFEDIARY
Hmmmmmmmmmmmm poster{s} one i'm convinced you both know the needful thing to do plss jux do it and dnt bug us with stories. Assistant fiancée ko' deputy finance ni'.
ReplyDeletePoster 2 rrrrruuuuuuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn so that u dont end up in misery and regret all ur life.
When u meet, u might not even like ur selves. So relax
ReplyDeleteHOL
See as some guy meet my friend on the street and asking him about his family and children but at end he asked my friend to go medical and check if he is the true father of his 3kids,today result come out and said no no no no no he is not their father,,a 48years old man will start life a new again,woman heart.......de first son of 15yrs looking to kill de mother but her friend sneak her out for the moment and husband not talking or saying anything children crying cos they have loose the best father to them,,i am just advicing my friend to adopt the children as his but the wife is much innocent in face to act such
ReplyDeleteAre you speaking Chinese???
DeleteSmtcheeeww!!
I hate when people don't respect there relationship. no matter the distance, the lady even has a serious guy who is looking to wife her yet she is inlove with another. Smh flee from temptation.. when u commit to someone,u flee from stuffs that's commitment.. if u can't that means u are not yet ready to commit. u two think your in love abi . ok leave ur respective relationships, then start dating believe me u two will get bored at some point and participate in anoda SnM.
ReplyDeleteGENTLE
P1: I have no words for you
ReplyDeleteP2: For the love of God, RUN! The reason he's ignoring you is so flimsy. If you let it continue like this, he's going to make you his toy. Treat you anyhow he likes because he knows you'll still come running back to him regardless of his bad behaviour. Because from what I see, you've done nothing bad to warrant such treatment from him. If he's not picking your calls, stop calling him. Your life does not depend on him. If you leave him, another will surely be available. Please open your eyes. Get out there and get a man that is worthy of your time and that you can see (I don't understand long distance relationships :/) Life's too short to be saddled with a child as a boyfriend/husband that you have to pamper to his every whim.
P2: Remember, don't let him think he owns you. No one has a right to police your life but you.
ReplyDelete