Hmmmmmm....
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
BROTHER CODE BROKEN
Stella please post
I’ve been dating my brother’s friend for about 8 months now and we just found out I’m pregnant. I’m 26 yrs old and he’s 8yrs older than me. My man has been wanting to let my brother know we’re dating but I wouldn’t let him. My reason was, incase the relationship didn’t work, I didn’t want to put it out there so we could just move on in peace but we got serious and fell in love.
It’s been an absolute joy these past months spending time and getting to know him. He’s amazing and treats me like a princess.
Last week he said there’s something different about my body. Next thing, he bought a PT and asked me to pee on it. Iol. The result was clear as day.
He is over the moon to be a dad.
Last week he said there’s something different about my body. Next thing, he bought a PT and asked me to pee on it. Iol. The result was clear as day.
He is over the moon to be a dad.
That same day, he called my brother and asked to meet up at his house.
Ever since my sweet daddy passed, my brother has stepped up to his responsibilities and he’s done a good job managing my dad’s business.
He placed me and my sister on a monthly allowance and makes sure we are comfortable even though we have good jobs. He’s very protective of us.
I quickly called my mum and told her to meet us. She also doesn’t know who I’m dating. Only my sister knows. I’m kinda an introvert and very private.
When my brother saw me he was confused so I asked my man to allow me tell him so he doesn’t freak out.
My brother jumped from his seat and threw his whiskey glass at his friend. Thank God my man dodged it. They almost came to blows if not for my brother’s PA and my cousin because me and my mum couldn’t even separate two huge men. It was total chaos!
He was like why my sister? Why my sister?
Honestly I’m confused. What does he mean by that. I get that they are close friends and he should have told him(which is my fault) but other than that my man is the most kind person with a beautiful heart I know.
My mum asked him why he reacted that way and if there’s a red flag with my man, he said we kept him in the dark.
My man said it’s about Bro Code. My brother has refused to pick my calls, I’m stressed out and I’ve cried my eyes out. I feel so bad for my man cos I see he values his relationship with my brother. I love my brother but I’m not leaving my Man for nothing. They would have to use pliers to peel me off him.
Please I need other men’s perspective. Why is this an issue with my brother?
Nah this kind thing dey scatter family...why didnt you find out about him from your brother ebore you started the relationship? what if your brother has a valid reason for his anger? Most guys dont really like their close friends marrying into their families.....I know of two guys who fought and almost killed each other cos one got the others sister pregnant.....The man went ahead to marry the friends sister but both guys dont talk till today and the sister cannot visit her brother...
Dont marry him without your brothers consent please....AND FIND OUT THE REASON HE REACTED LIKE THAT AND WHAT HE KNOWS!!!
He loves you, you love him. If his family loves you, marry him if that’s what both of you want!
ReplyDeleteIf your brother had said he was a bad person and a womanizer and things like that then that’s another matter, his only anger according to ur story is that you people didn’t inform him and bro code (holds laugh).
Keep apologizing to ur brother and leave the guys to sort out their issues between themselves!
As long as you are sure he’s the right person for u, I wouldn’t let him go just cos my brother is not in support!
I THINK I REPOSTED THIS BY MISTAKE....
DeleteMake una regive the advice nah, aint nothing wrong with
posting twice...
I’m glad sef because I never gave my advice on this one 😂
DeleteIt is what it is.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, Give him time to cool off.
He will eventually come around.
Wait fess,your story sounds familiar. Is your brother married? If yes,I will be back. Hmmmmmmm
DeleteYou seems adamant and driven by love to the extent of ignoring why your Brother reacted in such manner.
ReplyDeleteYou must be a very careless Lady.
Well enjoy your ride!
Dodo.
She will live with her husband and not her brother. Her brother is not her father and she's not dependent on the brother. You understand now?
DeletePosted this before
ReplyDeleteBut this Chronicle was posted last week???? Why the repeat?
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteYour man has broken the bro code more than once by knacking & give u belle. I can tell that all you care about is yourself, not how your brother feels from the start.
Let me use myself as an example: A very close friend of mine relocated for work, and as the only son, he pleaded with me to always check up on his mother and sisters some weekends.
Fast forward: one of his sisters started giving me signs until she finally told me that she preferred being with me rather than going out with an outsider she doesn’t know well. She said she has known me all these years. She was about 19 or 20 at the time (a virgin), very beautiful with curves.
But I made it clear to her that she is like a younger sister to me, and I should be protecting her, not the other way around. My friend looks out for my siblings too whenever I am not around, and I shouldn’t betray that trust.
The Bible says: Be your brother’s keeper.
The street says: A man carrying a gun never allows another man to carry one behind his back. If my intentions were genuine and I told my friend I wanted to be with his sister, he would 80–90% accept it. He has known my story and my family for a long time.
But any guy who goes behind your back to sleep with your sister is dangerous — such a guy could even kill you. You need to cut off such ties.
Now back to you, poster: your man and your brother may have shared a lot together, but he still went behind his back to sleep with you, and yet you have the mind to “moan.”
Your brother feels deeply betrayed, but life happens.
My advice: don’t give him the attitude of “it is what it is.” Keep apologizing to him — he will calm down in time. He’s just struggling to digest the whole situation. But your man should stay away from him for now and not try to explain himself or act like he’s proving a point. Nobody should force your brother to accept your relationship, but in time he will be calm. Still, he might lose trust in your man.
Keep in mind: deep down, he’s happy that you’ll soon bring another addition into the family.
Congratulations to you.
This should be in violation of comment etiquette. Summarize your thoughts next time or keep them to yourself.
DeleteGive your brother time to catch up with everything,you both betrayed him and his trust.
ReplyDeleteThe unwritten Bro code is that your friends sister is automatically your sister,so "putting eye" on her is like "incest",because you as a guy man is suppose to look out for your guys sister,whether he is around or not.
And even if you as a guy man catches feeling for your Bros sister,let him know,seek permission first,don't go behind and be doing hide and seek then suddenly just announce pregnancy,it's the height of betrayal from a bro to his friend.
Also most Bros knows the behind the scene with all of their close friends,so for one or two reasons they won't want a fellow Bro to be with their sister,which is deep especially if the two Bros are the "living/Chopping life" gang.
The friendship can be good for business,but not for you putting their sisters in the family way..
Hope this helps..
@MARTINS
It’s 2025, where is the wedding or married part or did I miss it?
ReplyDeleteThe brothers reaction is deep lol. I think it’s always a bad move to date siblings friends without their knowledge or acceptance.
Know the reason why he reacted the way he did
ReplyDeleteI understand this at all. I believe this guy will take care of the sister. Since he respects his friend.
ReplyDeleteWell too late, there is already a pregnancy coming. So he can't do anything. Eventually he will come to terms with it..
I also think your brother being protective of you is the reason why he reacted like that.
All the best. Let us know how it pans out.
The dramatics. I don’t see anything to worry about here. You have a baby coming soon, nobody is going to stress you and I am sure your brother will demand his friend make an honest woman out of you. Men know how to fix their problems and find peace again. Nothing to worry about here.
ReplyDeleteDon't worry about it. Your brother will calm down after some time. Invite him to the naming ceremony to take up your father's role. It is natural that he feels betrayed but the wound will heal eventually.
ReplyDeleteMarry your man jor. What is the big deal
ReplyDeleteHe knows why he reacted that way, there is something he knows, also maybe bcos he was kept in the dark. However, there is more than meets the eye! Just be patient, call the people he listens to, and go through them to speak to him. He is disappointed in both of you, it is like a betrayal, not everyone reacts same when disappointed/betrayed. You reason for keeping it secret seems okay but not enough, you were selfish thinking about yourself and what happens if it doesn't work out but did you consider his own feelings? You have broken his trust, to keep this from him. I guess your mom knows before now from your siblings but him been kept in the dark was bad, up to sex and pregnancy Haba!!!
DeleteMaybe, just maybe, your brother knows about one or two of your man's antics. And my guess is they are not good.
ReplyDelete"Why my sister"? That says it all.
He wouldn't want you to wear same shoes other may or may not have worn.
My humble advice: sit your man down and ask him if he has done anything to make your brother not want you to be with him.
If he says nothing happened, then try pleading with your brother.he would come around. Love always wins.
It seems some of you have amnesia it's been posted before
ReplyDeleteI haven’t seen it before. This is my first time seeing it, so for me it is new.
DeleteNo. This was not posted as a comment in a chronicle not as a stand alone post.
DeleteI guess that is why Stella reposted it.
Stella we have read this before.
ReplyDeletePoster, we hat is the update
I’m not sure this was posted. If I’m not mistaken, I think Stella lifted it from the comments section
ReplyDeleteYou are correct eka.
DeleteThe poster posted it in the comment section of one chronicle last week.
Hmm… God abeg! What should have been a thing of joy has now turned into rancour and strife.
ReplyDeleteOmo, your brother get anger for body oh to the point of throwing a whiskey glass at someone’s head! Hian!
Dear Poster, forget that “bro code” matter for now.........The real issue here is that you didn’t carry him along......And to be honest, you also didn’t show enough respect to your mom by not telling her first. From what you said, it seems you weren’t even sure about telling her about him.......This isn’t about being an introvert — it’s about being discerning and sensitive enough to carry family along........
Love happens; we can’t control it........ But if you had informed your brother earlier, things might have been clearer and calmer. Now that you’re expecting, it’s even more important to move wisely.......
If you’re unsure about something, always ask questions....... You could have given your brother time to cool off; calling him immediately was a bit premature.......
At this point, the best way forward is to involve your mom and maybe one respected elderly relative to intervene.........Use this time to come clean with your mom about everything: the pregnancy, how you both met, and all other details..........Please, keep this matter among the three of you for now. You and your fiancé should hold off any further discussions until you know the outcome of that meeting........
Your brother’s reaction was wrong, yes but it’s likely coming from a place of care and disappointment. This is not the time for confrontation or “gragra.”.......Be calm, act with maturity, and focus on resolution.......
Once things settle, you and your fiancé can discuss the next steps but first, try to understand why your brother is so strongly opposed......
All the best......
you did not tell your brother and the whole thing has passed date and hide. Give your brother some time to process the whole news and he will come around, some guys don't like their friends to date or marry their sisters especially those who do some shit behind. He was shouting why my sister because both guys has done some shit.
ReplyDeletePlease keep apologizing to your brother he will forgive you someday, make sure you allow them to fix themselves and do not get in between both to try settlement. They will be fine especially now that you are pregnant. Congratulations to you and your man.
Let's first know why your brother over reacted
ReplyDeleteI will even over react if i find out my best friend is knacking my sister. he reacted that way because he didn't know. you have to give him time to come to terms on the situation. There's nothing he can do if both of you love each other very well
ReplyDeleteAll the best
Poster said friend. Don't add best becos you want it to sound bad
DeleteI don't know why brothers don't allow their friends to date their sisters . Even in this popular movie " scar face" Al Pasino killed his best friend for marrying his younger sister.
ReplyDeleteYour man is a cunny, hope he won't kill your bros one day..
ReplyDeleteWhat if God scatter the relationship in His own way, will you kill yourself?
That your man is not a good friend, he did what he did to get back at your bros. He bite him where it will pain him.
Be praying for your bros o.
If you love your brother poster, you would have told him from day 1 that his friend is toasting you and that you like him and would want to date him. You betrayed your blood because of an outsider/prick. You think you’re smart. I wish you all the best as you’ve broken the family bond. Secrets your brother knows will be hidden from you. I pity you.
ReplyDeleteThey don waka go bad places together.
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't touch my brothers friends with a 10 foot pole unless I m given the go ahead.