It also gives me insight into how people still see HIV today, how much fear, misunderstanding, and emotion still surrounds it.
Recently, I saw a post where a lady asked for advice. She wanted to know if she could go ahead and marry her HIV positive partner.
What followed in the comments was intense. People were discouraging her from every angle. Some said she was signing up for trouble, while one comment even asked if she was ready to become a young widow.
A widow as how now?.
It was almost funny but also not funny at all, because for some people HIV still sounds like an automatic death sentence. But that is far from the reality we know today.
With proper treatment, antiretroviral therapy, ARVs, an HIV positive person can live a long, healthy life. In fact, many people on consistent treatment have a life expectancy very close to HIV negative individuals. People die every day from different causes that have nothing to do with HIV, just like everyone else.
Yet the fear in those comments shows something deeper, a gap between knowledge and perception. And that gap can be dangerous.
I kept thinking about the person who asked the question. Imagine being HIV positive, reading those comments, and not fully understanding your condition yet. Imagine seeing people speak about you like your life is already over.
Words like that do not just stay online. They sit in people’s minds. They can make someone feel hopeless, ashamed, or even afraid to seek proper care.
And that is what I do not like about pity, or rather misinformation disguised as concern.
I am not here for a pity party. Life is life. Everybody is going through something, just in different forms. Some people’s challenges are visible, others are not.
HIV is simply one part of someone’s health journey, not their identity, not a label that defines their future.
What I actually take from these discussions is this: we still need more awareness, not judgment. More understanding, not fear based advice. Because people do not just need opinions, they need accurate information that helps them live better, not worse.
At the end of the day, we are all just people navigating life. Different stories, same human experience.
What followed in the comments was intense. People were discouraging her from every angle. Some said she was signing up for trouble, while one comment even asked if she was ready to become a young widow.
A widow as how now?.
It was almost funny but also not funny at all, because for some people HIV still sounds like an automatic death sentence. But that is far from the reality we know today.
With proper treatment, antiretroviral therapy, ARVs, an HIV positive person can live a long, healthy life. In fact, many people on consistent treatment have a life expectancy very close to HIV negative individuals. People die every day from different causes that have nothing to do with HIV, just like everyone else.
Yet the fear in those comments shows something deeper, a gap between knowledge and perception. And that gap can be dangerous.
I kept thinking about the person who asked the question. Imagine being HIV positive, reading those comments, and not fully understanding your condition yet. Imagine seeing people speak about you like your life is already over.
Words like that do not just stay online. They sit in people’s minds. They can make someone feel hopeless, ashamed, or even afraid to seek proper care.
And that is what I do not like about pity, or rather misinformation disguised as concern.
I am not here for a pity party. Life is life. Everybody is going through something, just in different forms. Some people’s challenges are visible, others are not.
HIV is simply one part of someone’s health journey, not their identity, not a label that defines their future.
What I actually take from these discussions is this: we still need more awareness, not judgment. More understanding, not fear based advice. Because people do not just need opinions, they need accurate information that helps them live better, not worse.
At the end of the day, we are all just people navigating life. Different stories, same human experience.
Well said. The level of ignorance about HIV in 2026 is still shocking. Thank God for awareness and modern medicine
ReplyDeleteIt's well.
ReplyDeleteHey I have been in these streets since 2008. I have had HIV for more than 20years now. I have faced stigma from all corners. Family, colleagues, community etc. infact one of my neighbors who really demonized me and gossiped me the whole village died of cancer last year. Now to your issue. 1. HIV ain't going anywhere. So your family will have to accept you the way you are. If they don't just walk away. Somehow family members tend to understand things while you are away not while they can see you daily. Do this. Wake up one morning with a small bag. Just enough clothes to last you a week. Find a bedsitter in an area that is not too expensive where no one knows you. I did that back in 2007. Woke up one day and got myself a bedsitter at progressive githurai. Started living there and made a few friends. Worked my ass off today I got my own home. Created family boundaries. They are only allowed to visit me if I want. I live independently. I have since had children who are HIV negative and I live with them.
ReplyDeleteSending you. 💝♥️🌹 hiv is better than cancer and diabetes once you keep to the rules.
DeleteNo sickness is better than the other. May God no allow us see sickness
DeleteThank you for this piece.
ReplyDeleteMy opinion is " keep it to yourself" for your peace of mind.
ReplyDelete