Does it matter whom your children Marry as long as you see that they are happy and have peace of mind?
The Nigerian parents in this video clip argue about kids abroad coming back with foreign spouses....The first lady argues that she would rather her son who is abroad marry a Nigerian who will go down on her knees to greet her than marry someone who will give her the hand and say 'hello'...she talks about retaining the Nigerian culture by marrying a Nigerian.
What bout love?..is it about the parents getting the respect from their child's spouse or about knowing your child has found true love irrespective of who it is?
Another says he doesn't care as long as his child is happy,whilst the other says non Nigerians cannot bridge the Language gap,especially when the couples are having problems and their parents cannot interfere and settle them using their local dialect.
Some parents would rather die than have their children abroad marry oyibo?
Please watch this short video and join in the conversation.
Some Parents really need to stop interfering in their children's choice of spouses!
This is not about me please.
Consider this--it clearly shows the bible is against inter racial marriage.
ReplyDeleteLeviticus 19:19
“You shall keep my statutes. You shall not let your cattle breed with a different kind. You shall not sow your field with two kinds of seed, nor shall you wear a garment of cloth made of two kinds of material
Hian! See people twisting the bible for their own personal gains!!
DeleteMamie not everyone here is a christian. Besides christianity is d white mans religion and the bible was written to suit the racism at that time.
DeleteM-amie, the bible forbids alot of things in Leviticus and most of its laws are no longer in practice due to the fact that christ was introduced to us and everything is now made new and old things including leviticus are in the past. So your interpretation of the bible is backward and upside down for thinking God forbid s interracial marriages. Afterall he created all of us. Shikena
DeleteThe only marriage God banned in the bible ( and His definition of marriage is between a MAN and a WOMAN) is between believers and non believers.
DeleteMamie are u a "cattle"? D bible is precise and specific, so I tink u ve just twisted dat bible verse for ur gain or u don't understand d Bible at all!
DeleteDike Anthony
It looks like the bible was talking about farming and not human beings. This girl you sure you are ok?
DeleteOne's views can only be as twisted as their mind
Delete@ Hall u sure read ur Bible gul. Plz Keep it up!! I truly admire pretty chics that r close 2 God. Is a turn on 4 me. #plenty homo. Duhhhh
Delete@ M-anie really??? R u f**king kidding me??? Wow...plz stop turning the word of God upside dwn u hear? I will advice u pick up ur bible. Again and read thru'. This time, read 2 understand.
Buahahahhhahaaa Mamie baby!
Deletesome comments can just make your day. "Mamie are u a "cattle"? D bible is precise and specific, so I tink u ve just twisted dat bible verse for ur gain or u don't understand d Bible at all!
DeleteDike Anthony" lmao!!!!
@Samira, the old testament is still very relevant o. The New testament is a manifestation of the old testament. Pls note
DeleteYou are so ignorant! It sucks.
DeleteThis M-mumu must come qoute rubbish here. Twisting the bible to suit her with her wicked heart.
DeleteCattle = human. Really?
Oh! So ur racism reach oyibo too?
Please just tell us you have not worn clothes with 2 materials before?
Abeg face whatever work u are doing and dont come here to spew rubbish.
pls, let's not twist or misinterprete verses in the bible ...@ mamie, i believe that verse was refering to 'cloning' ...a genetic procedure being practised abroad...
DeleteAre you okay? So shallow and ignorant!!!
DeleteSamira is correct and mami you are an ignoramus..
Deletein jesus name, dear lord we bring our sister mamie,s brain before your throne of grace.....father she needs a reboot of her brain in jesus name......any pollution, any negative influence, substances that have influenced her thinking let them be destroyed by fire in jesus name......amen.....hallelujah, hallelujah......God bless you mamie love....
DeleteLeave M amie alone. At least she de read her bible. Different preachers with different interpretations of the bible. M amie is entitled to her own interpretation too.
DeleteRoflmao at Anons prayer for Mamie...lol. u guys will kill me o.
DeleteLet me copy that prayer. D girl needs it. Known on this blog for rubbish. Ah! Too funny.
M-amie, everytime I read your comments I wonder what kind of person reason this way?
DeleteYou are too full of yourself!
A tribalist!
And a Christian Hypocrite!
Gosh! You just made me too angry this morning!
Galatians 3 vs 28 totally nullifies that ur quotation. The bible is clear and God is not the author of confusion. We are all ONE!
DeleteOn my concurrent list are: a Caribbean girl, a Samba Lady, a Jew, Arabian, Hausa, Kanuri, Bura, Tiv, Idoma, Igarra, Warri, Isoko, Itsekiri, some part of Ondo-Osun-Kwara!!!!
ReplyDeleteAkoko-Edo will always be my favorites!!!
Igbo & Ijebu girls no dey my list@all..... I really wanna live long....
Thanks :)
U too have choice... njo. Wide mouth.
DeleteI should have a choice, it's part of my fundamental human right...... I'm sure you don't @anon904; otherwise, you'd never have been an ordinary anon that you are #facelessBitch
DeleteYomslaw Lindas bestie...u get choice oooo.kai
Delete@anon... Kikikikiki!u get bad mouth ooo
DeleteHahaahaahahaahah@yomslaw
DeleteOKIJA WIFE
Onu Ewu. Goat mouth.
DeleteUgly houseboy.
Deletedoes ur madam know u steal her phone to use for this rubbish u chat here.
Hmmmm, the bald man (no disrespect) made valid points. It's really hard finding Nigerian guys and if all you are finding are non-Nigerians why don't you date them and marry them if they have the same values and morals as you. And trust me, most of these oyinbo guys are not bad if you take time to know them, they might tell dry jokes and all, and keep to time but apart from that they are amazing to date.
ReplyDeleteAnd Nigerian parents need to butt out of their kids marriage/relationship because at the end of the day, the kids are the ones that have to live with the other person/party; all the parents are doing is complicating issues in my opinion.
Mama wants Bola that'll kneel down in front of her and smile with her but once she turns her back, she's cussing the shit out of her. But oyinbo is not like that, what you see is what you get, she shake you and that is it.
Don't get me wrong yall, I still love my naija bros, because African time is my middle name and I don't get to an event until 3 hours after it starts (which all naija does) compared to oyinbo man that must get there at the time printed on the IV, and it's annoying the way my oyinbo friends keep touching my weave to see how it was sewed in (don't touch a black woman's hair).
You didn't hear him right. Let me quote "there are not enough marriage eligible Nigerian women to match the number of marriage eligible Nigerian men..." Mind you eligibility has nothing to do with age; it has more to do with mentality and psychological readiness. So my wild supposition is that the foreigners end up marrying our ineligible women who the Nigerian men do not want anyway. So the question to all women is "Are you eligible?"
DeleteI disagree with the ineligible women factor in your comment. The basis for marrying your country person is the assumption that you automatically share the same values, morals.etc. Marriages require work so to enter them with asumptions will be futile. I made the same mistake marrying a man from my tribe. He was every bit the opposite of what I have culturally assumed Isoko men to be
Delete- honest, strong, hardworking. He was lazy, dishonest and a day dreamer. I very much doubt that I will be marrying a black man next talk less of a nigerian.
I don't mind marrying a foreigner, love is the most important factor. And I am sure my parents won't mind as well.
ReplyDeleteDoes local dialect settle marital issues? Nonsense! If my son wants to go to Jupiter to bring something to marry, he should knock himself out biko. As long as he is happy because I don do my own. I'm on my way out. The one that will make we hang by the balls is if he marries a man. #dead
ReplyDeleteNgozi sorry. I just had to #
I wonder Julit!
DeleteHow does dialect settle marital issues?
Rather they would use it against the spouse that does not understand the dialect.
I can marry anyone as long as he's not Muslim. Infact I want 2 marry an Oyinbo. So ystday 4 the 1st time I decided 2 comment in Linda Ikeji's blog cos the post caught my attention, then comments had not been uploaded, so after abt 1hr I opened the blog again and saw over 200 comments posted, so I went thru the comments 2 see if mine was there but it wasn't. After like 2hrs more I opened again 2 see if more comments have been posted, I saw 560 comments on the post so I tot yeah my comment wld be thr dis time arnd, again I went thru the comments and didn't see mine I was kinda disappointed. But then I noticed sometin, the last comment I read when the post had Over 200 comments was still the last comment I read when it said 560 comments. So outta curiosity I decided 3 count the comments one after the other 2 see if they were really up 2 dat number, I did dat 3times so 2 be certain and 2 my greatest surprise I counted only 201 comments. While on the post it said, 560 comments.
ReplyDeleteStellastica does it mean bloggers can increase the figure of comments on a post when the comments are not really up 2 that number??? Na busybody make me do am ooo. Lol! Any Linda voltron wey cuss me here back @ ya!! Stellastica u berra post dis. Phewwww!!!
U really av time oh... But I think av noticed wat. Ur talking abt, bt av nt paid much attention to it
DeleteIts not only ubdat has noticed my dear......I stopd commenting immediately I noticed!###teamstelladimokoko/laila/misspetitea
DeleteWetin u talk na true..always inflating the number of comments...Shiooorrrr
DeleteNext time click on the newer or the newest at the begining of the comments. Thank me later.
DeleteIf there are over 200 comments, they will naturally spill into another page. You only counted comments in one page, look around you'll def see a second page. Sdk blog also generates such traffic especially those DV post. There were over 300 comments and j read every single one of them. They also spilled in multiple pages. So stop whining cos u didn't c ur comment and just do ur research.
DeleteLol you are really funny and you have time,your new job befits you and the outcome of your investigation is possible. I commend you for your investigation and i need to recommend you to Nigeria state security service (SSS)for immediate employment.
DeleteYou really have time Bunny. Are you sure there wasn't a second/next page? Sometimes there are cases like that even here on SDK.
DeleteBut let me tell you something shocking I saw on LIB, she uploaded a story at 4:20 PM, and the first comment was @ 4:15 PM, how the hell that happened beats me. And it was on the same day, even someone called other commenters attention to that but he was ignored.
This thing bunny said is true. Even me i dey wonder self!!!
DeleteThey can't manipulate the numbers, the is a 'load more' tab written in red after the comment box which you failed to see. Your comment might be in the next batch.
DeleteU are a bush girl @Bunny....try and follow the link that leads to the continuation of the comments the next time you encounter that....... LindaIkeji doesn't have time for all that crap!!!!
DeleteEnjoy..... #learner oloshii!!!
You are probably using your phone to browse. Get a lap top or a palm top, you will be able to see all the comments.
DeleteYou think say computer na mumu like you? If post says 500 comments, that's what it is. Please upgrade yourself, get a bigger, better and more expensive machine to browse.
Bunny,wen d comments are more than 200,it spils to the next page. In this case u have to click on 'load more comments'. I don't think any blogger can inflate d number of comments cos it seems to me the system generates it automatically.
DeleteBunny,wen d comments are more than 200,it spils to the next page. In this case u have to click on 'load more comments'. I don't think any blogger can inflate d number of comments cos it seems to me the system generates it automatically.
DeleteBunny face ur work o....u get time sha.
DeleteIgnoramus and her supporters. Next time, check the next page.
DeleteI can take cusses and corrections 4rm any one except u Yomslaw. Ur so fugly man! With ur teeth like the ram God provided Abraham 4 sacrifice in place of Isaac. Which gal is kissing dat mouth? Yuck!!!
DeleteThis is what happen when you desperately wanna question God's blessing on someone's hustle. You become myopic to simple logical reasoning. Bunny, leave Miss Ikeji alone and face your work.
Deletelmaoooo. i likethi yomslaw's courage, cu with that face it takes a lot of courage to still open that dirty mouth and talk rubbish,i think he is still a child
Delete@Lisa. Lol I noticed that on LIB yesterday too. Was wondering how one can post a comment before the original post was published. I don't even comment on any blog but sdk's. Ain't got time to read tru 400commrnts or more just to be interactive, when I do it better here with like minds.
DeleteMeanwhile bunny dear...lmao..i was like u a few months ago too when I just started to read blogs. I also used to wonder why the last comment would be same, yet the thread increased in number. I realised that to be able to read pass the first page of comments, u have to switch to the browser on ur fone to click on the next page. U can't do that on ur mobile shortcut page. If u got to the bottom of every post, you'll see the view Web version sign, click on that and u are good to go.
To those who are condemning her for raising her query, u are the ignorant ones and not bunny. Only a wise person will ask questions.. not an ignoramus who'ill be forming know it all, yet doesn't know jack.
Bunny I was about to cuss u but I can see that u have cussed out this idiot yomslaw very well so I love u.
DeleteI love it wen pple cuss out yomslaw..i laugh out loud...literally!
Deletebunny you are an ode you are really reading just one page. kai olodo.
DeleteI don't mind marrying a foreigner, love is the most important factor. And I am sure my parents won't mind as well.
ReplyDeleteMy uncle who is a lecturer in Harvard, has sworn that his 4 sons who all schools in Harvard right now, wud never marry anybody except a Nigerian. I asked him why and he said in a nutshell 'oyibo wahala too plenty' Lol. Because, he married an American in the 80s and it wasn't a gud experience for him. Another aunt married a German since 1995 and she's doing really great and happy. So, me I no come know again o. But if better Oyibo come my way, oboy, I go waka abeg. Make I go where light and better road day joor, I can't fit shout. Hehehehe!!
ReplyDeleteHappy sunday Stella.
The problem with marrying a foreigner is that as you and your spouse get older, you will go back to your roots. If you liked eating amala when you were young but stopped eating it when you met your beau, you will go back to it later in life and so will your beau fall back to their culture. We are all products of our environment.
DeleteWell said jj
DeleteWell i personally do not fancy a foreigner for a bf or for a husband. I tried to date Americans while in college but I just did not fancy them. But my brothers are all married to foreigners. One is married to a jamaucan, who's a great lady by the way. Another is married to a Brit, and another to a black American. All of them are having a superb union. My brothers are very well behaved, and they treat their woman right. No drama at all I must confess. So it's an individual thing. I think I have more fun being with a naija man. We can crack jokes, we share the same cultural ideologies even with our individual differences. So for me it's convenient.
DeleteBut the aunty that married a german is happy. Im sure the uncle is at fault. Naija men are asshes no matter who they marry.
DeleteAmala indeed. He cant make d amala himself? Shiooor.
I too I'm in this predicament even though mine has to with tribalism. Let's face it tribalism is what will destroy this country if we are not careful.
ReplyDeleteMy Bf's parents want him to marry from their place. And he told them he already has someone who he wants to marry who is not from their place. But they are happy about it. I try to take him to church cos he doesn't ever go to church but his mother is rebuking him that the Catholic Church is not where he should be. So I'm wondering if she prefers her son to be remain a non church going person than to go to a Catholic church.
He said he has not dated a decent girl from his place, that it may start well but he'll later start seeing d babe's answering calls from strange men n he'll start hearing of how they are sleeping wit different men. So he doesn't trust girls from he's place as wife's. Btw, did I mention that they are TIV from venue state. I'm just praying that everything works out fine n we'll be together at the end cos let's face it, parents have a lot of influence on their kids. Fingers crossed
Dont go to a family where u are not loved or wanted, u ll definitely regret it.
DeleteI tell you @anon 9:28am. If the family doesn't like you, it might be difficult for them to accept you. Godforbid anytin happens, their next point to thought will be afterall you weren't welcome in their house. Don't force yourself. Just commit everything into God's hands, and allow him be the captain of your ship. God bless.
DeleteIf you are a catholic you are better off marrying one cos you both would be united in the religious aspect and your kids would be brought up without conflicting religious view points
DeleteOLORI
I'm not for inter racial marriages, cos sometimes when love clears from their eyes, the differences in culture can be what brings about divorce. My friend has an oyibo wife, and when she gave birth, the morther wanted to bathe the baby the traditional way and was just being that typical annoying MIL that they turn to after baby comes in the picture. It ended with the boy telling his mother to never come to his house.
ReplyDeleteMost oyibo pple are not as tolerating, and we Naija's don't understand boundaries.
If my son wants to marry oyibo, I don't mind as long as they live in Naija and she's open to learning our culture and raising her kids in that manner too, but to allow a daughter to marry oyibo for me is like dashing your child away.
Bet, whaddo i know?... My 2 cents sha.
It's true sha. That's how I heard a story of a woman who travelled to the states to visit her son after about 10years of not seeing him since he married his oyibo wife. The woman's daughter who also lived in the same town as her brother was d one who arranged for their mom to visit America. When the woman landed, without pre informing his son, she went to his house to surprise him.
DeleteWhen she got there the oyibo wife refused her entry, on the basis that she wasn't informed. Ok, fine, maybe the woman shouldn't have bumped into them like that. But after all the back n forth, the oyibo called her hubby to say her mother was at the door. Do u know that he also refused his wife to allow her into the house to wait for him? This woman sat in front of the house in d cold, and she waited hours for her son to return. The oyibo kept peeping thru the widow to talk to her MIL
The point is that even if the woman came un announced, a naija babe will use her discretion to handle her MIL. Even against her husband's wish, she'll attend to the old woman and later sort it out with hubby. I heard that the woman cried and cried that she has lost her son to a white woman who couldn't even accord her warm hospitality after coming that far.
The woman cursed and swore never to visit her son again. These are the kinds of animosity that happens when Africans marry foreigners. They lose their core values and it hurts most patents.
Future MIL from hell.
Deletesisi eko this story is bullshit....the woman should curse herself for raising a foolish son.....people open their mouths to blame foreigners as if they don't have worse people in Nigeria......what core values are u talking about? what values does the African tradition teach when the same african tradition encourages men to cheat and they treat widows like shit amongst other nasty stuff.....we africans think we have it all yet we see worse things in our backyard......always blaming others for our bad behavior....how will an oyibo woman influence you to allow your mother sit outside for hours without going in? if she did not let her in cos she came uninvited why did the man not tell her to let her in?...u have nasty people all over the world so cos an oyibo woman did that then all of them will allow their inlaws sit outside cos they did not give any notice?i have lived in the Uk and some of my white neigbours were so friendly it was amazing......so if the hubby who owns the mother refuses to allow the wife enter how is that the woman,s fault? when oyibos marry our men and they come to naija some of the women conform so nothing wrong in doing some things the way they are used to.....agreed some cases are extreme but we are not better than them in any way....nigerians have to begin to learn that in life you need to have boundaries in how u conduct yourself.....we know all the shit that goes on in marriage cos of family interferences so in everything there has to be a balance.....besides nigerians are so bloody tribalistic and nasty to themselves so they should not be complaining about others.....nothing wrong with interracial marriage so far love exist.
Deletesisi eko please name those core values they loose lets hear.....bullshit
Deletegbam! 12:14pm
DeleteSome of our cultural or core values need to be looked into!
Something must have happened in the 10yrs to make her not open the door and wait for her husband. People cry foul after they have created problems for themselves
DeleteAnon 12:14 I agree with u absolutely. Like I said earlier, I personally do not have issues with interracial marriages...all my brothers are married to foreigners and they are cool. The story I cited here was as is, I for one do not like how the woman was refused entry, regardless. Even if she's a witch, our culture forbids that u treat ur mother this way. I think the man did this to please his wife. If he was single, perhaps he wouldn't have done such. And like Anon 12:14 said, the man himself has issues. Then he combined or imbibed his wife's orientation, which resulted a total disaster.
DeleteAnon12:16. It may sound bullshit to u. But no matter how many years I spend outside Nigeria, the core values I was raised with as an African lady goes every where with me. And it may interest u to know that most of the foreigners who became my friends while I schooled abroad, were always eager to learn my culture and why I did certain things the ways I did them. There's always something distinct about Africans, and some white folks love to know why we are different. That is the hard core values I talk here..ok?
Anon6:40. U may be right. I thought same too when I first heard it. But regardless, if the woman travelled that far to see u, c'ommon, u have to bury the strife and honor ur mother no matter what.
Hmmm.... I am an Anambra girl married to an Anambra guy... It has not been easy o, even with similar cultures and all.... But the probability of marriages lasting when you have similar culture is quite high... They are certain things he cannot do, certain lies he cannot tell because I go catch am straight.
ReplyDeleteI live abroad o and really after almost 10 years of marital life, I honestly wish my kids would marry someone from Anambra too.... Surely nothing is 100% guaranteed cos they are also very bad People from my state, but at least I always wanna play safe and I wouldn't want marital stress like divorce and everyday quarrels for my kids.... But in the end o, really hmmmm.... If they find true happiness with a white lady, why not?
My own be say, if they must marry a Nigerian girl, then she must be an Igbo Christian from a God- fearing and well-educated family with exemplary parents.... No juju family o.... I no get strength for drama and fights abeg.... Marriage hard and I believe in unity.
Your state Anambra is the worst state when it comes to finding love/marriage in the whole of Nigeria. Any non Anambra dating any Anambra man or woman from other state should forget it you have 90%chance of being dumped because of pressure from their parents and non acceptance. You people are too tribalistic even to your fellow ibos in other states. Anambra people castigate other ibos not being ibo enough or they are useless and not marry-able with very timid sense of reasoning as if your people are better. For Anambra man to marry IMO,Abia,Delta,Enugu,Ebonyi even Anambra person getting married to Nsukka person from Enugu state is even huge problem they regard those once as outcast. My dear you people are too tribalistic and act backward change is needed in that state.
Delete@Peter you re absolutely right. Anambra ppl are so so tribalistic with their Awkward mentality. They always feel to be superior among others. Gosh these guys can downgrade their fellow igbo's to nothing just bcos you're not from their state. Abeg life is not that serious you guys needs to take some pills.
DeleteYes oh!! Well said jare!! After all d pressure 4rm my husband families,,dem no get choice dan to accept me oh,,been an OSUN babe,dey were alwayz complaing dat their first son is not suppose to marry yoruba....hmmm....my son will never behave like dem sha!! "My mama talk say ppl,after dem don scatter d girl tohtoh finish''smheeeeew................OKIJA WIFE
DeleteU so very right. Anambra no deh marry outside their village
Delete@ Peter God bless u so much 4 dis comment,Anambras re terrible wit dis inter-marriage thingy,after dating one of their guys and marriage issue comes up,what u will hear is 'mma anyi si,mpa anyi si'that is my papa and my mama talk say make I no marry from outside our place,can u imagine?
DeleteI am from Anambra with 6 brothers. 3 are married to Yoruba women who gossip from morning to night and have inferiority complex. 2 have Imo wives who live to fight with everyone and are only happy when their hubbys give them money. 1 is married to a girl from our village and she is a combination of all the rubbish characters. Education cuts across all tribes, races and religions.
DeleteAnyone already deciding who their kids will marry is only planning the demise of their relationship with their kids.
Gbam Peter and Anambra people are the most fetish of all. Start with the okija shrine and all their ofo this and ozo that.
DeleteAnambra people?mschewwww!
DeleteMy brother's married to an akata, and they're having serious issues. I think their problem might have ended if they came home more, cos good Nigerian families know how to calm the woman, and talk sense into the man when he's wrong.
ReplyDeleteAnd cos she's akata, they're already talking divorce, custody, child support, she calls the cops on him when they fight. Don't get me wrong, I think most of the issues are from my brother oh, but if she was a Niaja girl, she'd have dragged his ass home, and sorted out the issue earlier, cos my parents are fully behind her (minus the cop-calling business), and they really don't want a broken home, but she's scared of malaria, typhoid, germs and armed robbers, so she wont come. They've tried ending it for them on the phone, but that's so pointless.
And my parents both have very busy careers, so neither of them is going to take out one month to go sit with them to re-train the boy into doing the right thing, and teach the girl to stop calling the cops and firm up where she needs to.
That cop calling is so annoying. Even our nigerian sisters are practicing it now in America especially!!! Nah bad thing we sabi copy. No one wants to work at their marriage anymore. Its a case of for better for stay, for worse for go. If we all had this attitude, no one would be in their home today. marriage is tolerance and a lot of patience
Deletethe mere fact that you're referring to your brothers wife as an akata gives the picture of what this woman might be going through to the point of calling the cops on your brother.
DeleteYou claim she does not want to visit because of malaria, gems and armed robbers this is the same as you calling her akata. Why don't you change your mindset. Akata is derogatory and you might have been referring to your brothers wife as akata to his face and it behooves the imagination what your brother knowing that his family might not accept his wife is putting her through.
Women do not call the cops for nothing. Why don't you tell your brother to stop being an abuser. Look at the news in Nigeria, where daily women are abused and killed. In 9 out of 10 marriages women are abused. Tell me, other than Nigerian women who wants to remain in the marriage abusive or not, which woman will put up with abuse? The marriage creed said for better or for worst, is that how your brother and other Nigerian men interpret the worst? Worst being they can abuse women and the woman should remain in that abusive relationship? When he left Nigeria your brother should have known that countries out of Nigeria and out of Africa for that matter have placed laws against domestic abuse. Because given the chance men take it too far. And still your brother cannot act in a way that not abusive and thats why his wife calls the police on him. Believe me if your brothers wife called the police with no just cause, the police would have arrested her and charged her for making false report. So she had cause to call the police (i.e. abuse)
Because Nigeria is a lawless land doesn't mean other parts of the world is.
Your post speaks volumes and reflects what the woman is going through. BTW, you Nigerians speak lowly of akata's yet you want to emulate them: the skin colour, hair etc. Most akata especially Caribbean girls have a skin tone and hair that Nigerian women crave hahahahaha
Anon 2.49...u have spoken well.
DeleteWetin anonymous 2:49 dey yarn sef?
DeleteMakes no sense
Toooo long
Boring
#yawnsssss#
See pages abeg. Just to make your point known? Sighs.
DeleteHaba Anon 2:49 u were a bit too harsh and irascible. She admitted that her brother is the problem in the marriage, let's give it to her. And from what she said, it seems she speaks for their entire family. And who told u that the wife will only call the cops becos she's in danger? My dear I have lived in the, U.S most of my life....i assure u that not every 911 domestic duress calls are justified. I have seen these Americans call the cops just for leverage or to set their partner up. Doesn't mean that her brother was physically abusive. And ur contention about referring to them as akata...Pls spare me. most of us are used to that word, it doesn't mean that we think lowly of them. Well I don't. Its just a slang and I won't think much of it.
Deleteanonymous 5:17 and 8:10. Here's what I read from what you've posted. Your grammar is poor and you think 2:49 post is too long. This tells that you people do not read. And you are comfortable in your ignorance. It's not your fault, when you don't have the ability to read and comprehend, all you're comfortable with is few sentences. It's ok there are many like you, so don't feel like you're alone in your predicament.
Delete,2•49 makes an excellent point. U 2 idiots would find it boring though.
Deleteafi use naa. afi meant naa. afi feel lowly naa
DeleteWhen non-blacks call you the n word I hope you will be okay with it.
Deleteif the Nigerian police was well structured like the the developed countries trust me alot of Nigerian women will call the cops for their hubbys.......men get away with alot of beating in this part of the world.....we allow them get away with too much that is why they treat women anyhow...sisi eko i dont care what part of the Us u live in most 90% of calls to the police by women for domestic abuse is either beating, threatening to kill or they are in a state of fear that their partner might harm them so stop talking crap......
Deletesisi eko your comments are most times very stupid honestly
DeleteAnon12:27 oh bravo. Yes my comments will sound stupid to u because we are definitely NOT like minds. Minds apart. So perhaps you should find those on the same level as ur thinking cap capacity, so to make sense of their comments. Kapish? Ode
DeleteNigerian or Non Nigerian doesn't matter for all I care as far as there's love,understanding n most importantly d person is headed in d same direction spiritually. Cos I've seen a lot of Nigerian-Nigerian marriages dat didn't work cos of spiritual incompatibility(one is a muslim,d oda is a christian or one is a fire_brand christian n d oda is just a churchgoer)tho dey r frm same place,have same cultural values n all *dropsmic*
ReplyDeletePics u av oyinbo husband or I don't believe u
ReplyDeleteover my dead body for my two daughter to marry a nigeria,i am nigeria but what i went through in the hands of the families of a nigerian boyfriend i have a child with,I do not pray it for my enemies talk less of my children.
ReplyDeleteGhen ghen! Your two daughter! You're a nigeria!!
DeleteBuahahhahahaaaa....,anony 1:31pm. U nor just well. Lmao
DeleteI can marry anyone except muslim!
ReplyDeleteUr cup of tea...mtssew
DeleteI don't think my parents will object to my choice of a partner afterall am a product of two tribes. What really matters is his religious inclinations, ideals, family background etc Besides in my mum's place nobody has ever told me to greet, na my papa people like those kind things
ReplyDeleteMy Children can marry anywhere they want....I don't care so far they are happy.....Anambrains are the most racist people I have ever seen in the whole of Nigeria....where I come from,we don't marry from Imo state especially,Owerri and Mbaise,Edo,akwa ibom and calabar etc.... infact,your parents will disown you....its beginning to annoy me...
ReplyDeleteHmmm linda, my momma has said something about mbaise people oh! That they are something something, she mentioned abia state too but mhen, God help me sha
DeleteLinda pls where r u from? I have d same issue right now. M from mbaise but my bf's family said no. We r in it alone. No uncle to go pay my bride price or go meet my people. M so sad we dnt no wat to do. We myt just go to dubai n do a quiet wedding in April. Stella I like ur blog, first time of commenting
DeleteU are right linda
DeleteLinda you are right. But tinz are beginning to change and it also depends on the relationship the child has with her parents. 2 of my brothers married non anambra gals and I married a yoruba man.
DeleteLol. Imo people are wary of anambra in laws too. Ije ke be and ife a ife a things.
DeleteNa wa o, is there hope for me at all? I am from kaduna state and my wonderful boyfrnd of 3yrs is from Anambra. I don dey fear o! God knows if his mum and siblings do not like me i will find my way. Both of us are scared of introducing each other to our families.
DeleteLinda you re so right. I wonder if their mentality will ever change.
DeleteIf u hold correct cash and can look after the girl Anambra parents no go mind. Money answereth all tins. Amen
DeleteIn my own case marring a foreigner is the best thing that happened to me, it suits my person ( i no like wahala at all ) They say i am socially white ( what ever that means ) There is nothing like peace of mind, and i am totally in control of my home. Marrying a muslim is a NO NO for me and my family.
ReplyDeleteyou believe you're socially white and thats the mindset you take to your relationship.
DeleteI've a friend like you. He date white girls, indian girls and black girls. But he thought the black girls wahala was too much. The white girls he married would call him hundreds of time in one day to see what he was doing and where he was, who he was with. But one question the black girl would ask, "are you dating someone else." He would curse her down and tell her she is too much. When he was broke and down and out, he seek his black women because, he knew she would understand him and she tried all her best to comfort him. He got a good job and guess what? He dumped the black girl and started dating white girls, he didn't even give the black girl a good enough reason for dumping her. Simply we do not match. Didn't he know they did not match when he was broke and down and out. Calling her his babe and his best friend. But as soon as he got a job, made thousands a month, got a good apartment. She stop taking her calls and didn't even invite her to the apartment. Imagine, the guy lived in a dumb when he was dating that girl and she never asked him for anything, and when he was in his wahala with no job, he would call that girl 2 times a day, and text her throughout the day. When he got his apartment, he invited his oyibo friends over and never invited that black girl that saw him as somebody way before he knew he could.
The girl told me what hurt her heart the most was one day she called him and he said, my friends are over I can't talk. And she asked herself, where were all those friends when you were a broke man unable to feed yourself?
He treated this woman like shit because in his insecure mind he though oyibo was good and pure. The jist of this is oyibo and blacks give the same wahala, but because you seem to believe that blacks are trouble, you don't care what they say or do, you will see it as trouble.
Its just as the whites who think that black is bad, it doesn't matter what blacks do, bad is all oyibo would see. The one bad overpowers all the good that the black does. This my brother/sister is you.
My dear it is your opinion oh, i have said my own oh, marry black man? MBA NU. Lol. You all know opinion is like ass hole :) every body has one . Lol.
DeleteMe I want to marry an oyibo oooo,I don tire 4 naija men wahala mbok. Anyone dat can link me up to a correct white dude should pleasssse help a sister and comment under. He'd never regret getting to know me at all. Help a sister somebody/anybody...lol
ReplyDeleteSOS! Stella hook ds chiq with a German brother.....
Delete@Bloglord, what's the meaning of SOS.
DeleteIts a distress signal.
DeleteMy children can marrry any good man irrespective of tribe.
ReplyDeleteReligion----he's got to be a christian.
Physical Looks....i will not tolerate a "yomslaw-the -teethus-kind"!
Hehehehe (one love bro)
Hahahahahaha! My palm wine fell.
DeleteDats a gud one @ bloglord..lmao..stupid yomslaw
DeleteThey're busy cursing Yomslaw: and here they are, digressing into the most controversial of topics of discussion-- religion!!!!
DeleteSome of these oyibo wives no dey gree follow their men home when d chicken finally comes home to roost. I prefer marriage between pple who share same cultural values and boundary.
ReplyDeleteI hope no be Nnewi guy u dey look cos dem don useless finish. Is only our father's time dat they were real men nd only a few tho.
DeleteStupid! The bible says go into the world n multiply. Weda na white black or purple as long as d person in human its ok by me
ReplyDeleteAll I want is a mixed race baby. Seriously hunting for an oyibo man now. No time for love.
ReplyDeleteCeeCee
Love is d key word
ReplyDeleteWhat do I do to get over heartbreak asap?
ReplyDeleteI am married to a non Nigerian and it's the best thing I did for my self, he is Nice, he cooks, he cleans he looks after the kids he finds joy in come home early from work to help them do home work and like to bath our sons and tells bedtime stories, he let's me have my freedom and am not saying a still don't do any of the above o plus I have a maid but he knows when am tired he loves my family because he loves me he loves anything I love, why I pointed out this facts is because I know a lot for Nigerian men who don't have as much money as my husband they start acting like gods expect they wives to be slaves go out and come home when ever they like. Don't respect they wives. But with marring a foreigners you are in charge of your home , they let you be you, very hardly will you get abused. You live a very good life and when they love you, they don't just say it they show it, they care about you and everything that has to do with you. Been married for 15 years and I can tell it still feels like dating. So my dear I don't think I will let my kids marry a Nigerian o especially my girls . I have seen how my friends suffer in the hands of our men. Womanising, lies ,cheat and up top still beat them. So I pray my my kids get to that stage they find love like me from a foreign. My two cents.
ReplyDeleteEverything you pointed out your foreign husband does for you, there are millions of Nigerian men who do the same or better. Not every Nigerian man beats his wife or oppresses their wives. Perhaps, you had a bad experience with the Nigerian men you dated when you were single. Speaking of violence, no one kills their spouses more than oyibo.
DeleteIn terms of wanting your girls to marry Oyibo, you need to make every effort to give your girls an identity; and the identity will come from one culture. And if you decide they should they should adopt the identity of their father's culture, please be advised that they will never be accepted in that culture even if they lived in that foreign land for a 100 years. Adopting a Nigerian culture for your children gives them the identity they will need to succede in life. And if they grow up in Nigeria, that is even better. Some day, they are going to start dating snd want to get married, they are going to have sn easier time finding mates with people they share a cultural identity with. Without an identity in life, we are all lost.
Na enjoyment you dey oooo hmm. Cloud 9.....
Delete@ J J my kids have got a Nigerian identity we came to live in Nigeria for 5 years cause I told hubby I wanted my kids to understand my culture so he got his company to cross post him, dey speak yoruba with me and my family and they even communicate between them self in pegin English. So what identity could you can't. .
Delete@Anon 5:10am, Well, you've done the right thing. Your children will grow up with a foundation. They will have a cultural identity on who to marry when they reach that age.
DeleteI realize that we cannot all marry Nigerians. Some people are attracted to others. However, I was merely pointing out some of the pitfalls of marrying a foreigner, but you seemed to have given your children the option to have the cultural identity they will need when they grown up. You've done well.
jj what rubbish are u saying....stop talking crap....do u know which non nigerian culture she is talking about? so where will they not be accepted 100% come from? when you teach them to accept who they are they will not need validation from any culture to be who they wanna be....get your head outa ya arse please.....
DeleteJJ, I strongly disagree with you!
DeleteWhat Nigerian men do what???
They don't do a quarter of what she listed out!
@Anon 12:35 PM, First, there is no need for you to use lewed language on this forum. We are all adults and can have a healthy conversation without resorting to such language.
DeleteGetting back to my comments, I'm not sure where you call home. Maybe if you have lived in a Western country, where the African culture is constantly under attack and repressed, you will understand the importance of giving your children a strong identity. Why do you think many Nigerian families, who have children overseas bring their children back home to attend elementary and/or secondary school. You are the person who doesn't know what they are talking about.
@Anon 5:58pm, Nigerian men carry all of your burden. If we are as bad as some of you are describing, why haven't you all ran off to go marry foreign men? Frankly, the description Anon 3:07pm gave of her husband is someone, who is in love with his wife and everthing about her. Pethaps, he also loves her culture that he is willing to go above and beyond to please her. Well, he is an exceptional father and husband and deserves to be commended no matter what race they are. Now are you telling me that there are no Nigerian husbands and fathers who have the same qualities and better? Well, I can tell you my father was the same way growing up and he is Nigerian to the core and there are countless of Nigerian husbands and fathers who are the same. If Oyibo had it so good, why is there a signicantly higher rate of violence and divorce in their culture than here in Nigeria?
DeleteMarrying an oyibo is like not marrying @ all cos @ oldage wen u decide to return back to Nigeria, u wil come back without a wife/husband or kids.....My uncle came home @ 50yrs to luk for a wife(who wan marry old papa) lol. But if u choose to live nd die abroad its fine which is rare.
ReplyDeletethink before you talk......have you ever heard of tai solarin, his wife just died like 2 years ago-a foreigner who stayed back even after her hubby passed on....there are many more foreign wives scattered in naija so please dont use your uncle as a yardstick...besides you dont know why she did not follow him back........naija men treat women anyhow then in old age they will be loyal to you? story
DeleteAll of you above saying marrying a Muslim Is a No No, are you all okay at all?
ReplyDeleteSo Muslims are not human beings?
Take chill pill nah, its not a fighting matter pls. We are okay, just to avoid stories that touch, marry into your religion.
DeleteMarry a Boko- haramist? MBANU nwanne, no way... Highly impossicant.... U want make im use im aggressiveness bomb me and my family?
DeleteLol the fear of terrorists is the beginning of wisdom.
Deleteas a born again christian i can never marry a Muslim unless he repents and accepts Christ.......Jesus is the way the truth and the life, no one comes to the father except through him
DeleteMuslims are okay the religion is scary.Light to darkness
ReplyDeleteHmmmM my gf is a catholic and from anambra, I'm an adventist(opposite of catholic) and from abia. Wahala bust *crying* I don't think we can survive cus d mama hmmm na those kind women wey dey like show xtian catholic mama dem. Hmmm I rest my case. But there is sumtin always fetish about anambarian's and their mone, if that's the case I won't touch an anambra girl,blood money children tins . God help us
ReplyDeleteAbeg. I'm Catholic. My husband is adventist. We are happily married.
DeleteWe go to one of the new generation churches.
And on special occasions, we go to catholic one week and adventist the next.
U sound like a danfo driver.
Delete@1st anon gbam. too fetish
DeleteDearest Stella .....please share ur own story cos Na interracial marriage u dey so...How have u been coping n was ur take on dis issue......Are u for or against #replypls#
ReplyDeleteHmmmM my gf is a catholic and from anambra, I'm an adventist(opposite of catholic) and from abia. Wahala bust *crying* I don't think we can survive cus d mama hmmm na those kind women wey dey like show xtian catholic mama dem. Hmmm I rest my case. But there is sumtin always fetish about anambarian's and their mone, if that's the case I won't touch an anambra girl,blood money children tins . God help us
ReplyDeleteAnon r you a catholic from anambra? Its not d same as catholic from other state!
ReplyDeleteI married my Nigerian husband whom I met in America when I was 20 and he was 25. We have been married now for 37 years and to tell the truth, the only problem I had was with my mother-in-law who didnt think her son should be married to a foreigner. At first I was hurt by her treatment of me then after a while I just ignored her and concentrated on my husband and kids. After all, I didn't get married to her. All I owe her was to be civil to her. To tell the truth, it was and still is an uphill task but I look at my children today and I have absolutely no regrets. I think the problem most mixed marriages have is that the wife tries to please both the man and his people. My first allegiance was to my husband. It worked for me, plus the fact that I am a Caribbean woman and as such could not be intimidated, lol
ReplyDeleteI have read all the comments so far until more is published, and I have come to the conclusion that peoples' decision are based on past experiences and stories heard, which is understandable, because once bitten, twice shy. But there is always an exception to the rule.
ReplyDeleteLove is not enough to keep a marriage happy and stable, so many other factors play a role in the institution.
When I was not married, I would have agreed with many comments here saying tribe, religion and race does not really matter . But, since I got married 14 years now, I tend to disagree; tribe, race and religion does matter.
If the couples involved in inter-tribal, inter-racial, and inter-religious marriages are ready to compromise on some issues, and avoid external interference, then no problem.
No matter how I would try to explain my reasons, many would still disagree with me, which is understandable, but the taste of the pudding is in the eating.
You said it exactly the way it is.
DeleteGbam
ReplyDelete