Hmmmmm.....
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
ADVICE NEEDED
We had a younger brother in the family who was highly, highly irresponsible. Our mom is the only one alive, our dad is late, so whenever we see a girl around him, we quickly caution the girl and tell him, we know our brother, very boastful guy.
We had a younger brother in the family who was highly, highly irresponsible. Our mom is the only one alive, our dad is late, so whenever we see a girl around him, we quickly caution the girl and tell him, we know our brother, very boastful guy.
We say to the Ladies '' Don't go and mess around with him or allow him raise your hopes. Everything that you have seen in this house here or you've seen around or that he might have shown you was worked for by our parents, we don't want you to mess around him or think he's ready to have a wife or something''.
Around the middle of 2024, he got three ladies pregnant almost at the same time, and now the big issue is there was a clash between vigilantes and some group early this year, which resulted in his death.
My mum just reached out to me now that the ladies in question are disturbing our family back home.
Two of them have put to bed, and it's so worrisome for our mother who is managing her health. Three ladies, we are at crossroads. We don't know what to do. We warned these girls and see us here now, we are left with the deep pain of his loss and the burden of all this in his absence.
He acknowledged these pregnancies while alive. Everything is so confusing for us. We don't know what to do.
What exactly are you supposed to do? let the Ladies go and find work to take care of their kids.....Get them to stop harrassing your mum either for money or to take care of the babies...
What exactly are you supposed to do? let the Ladies go and find work to take care of their kids.....Get them to stop harrassing your mum either for money or to take care of the babies...
On the other hand your family should be happy he left some kids behind and try to reach some kind of agreement with the ladies so that you people can have contact with the kids as they grow..
He's late,so why are they disturbing your families
ReplyDeleteGood advice from Stella. Nothing more to add.
ReplyDeleteExactly my thought.
DeleteAaahhh!
ReplyDeleteFirst off they know he is late, so the responsibilities are all on them. What they need is assurance that your family have accepted their kids as your family.
the ladies do they want to come and stay with your mother as his wife even when he is no more? they should go and hustle to take care of their children, you and your mum did not ask them to open their legs for your brother without getting married to him. The young man is no more, no one to be blame here but the three ladies.
ReplyDeleteYou and your mum should just have a meeting with the three families and agree on what you can give each lady to take care of their children. Please make sure is something you all are comfortable with giving and not what you will have to break the bank to give. They should take responsibility for their action.
If they don't have a handwork,the best thing your family can do for them(if you are buoyant enough and can afford) is send them to a place where they can learn something(handwork) they can do for a long time to train their various kids.
ReplyDeleteCould be hairdressing,nail tech, tailoring etc.
If they refuse to take the offer,allow them be,because they are adults and you cant be sponsoring them forever while they relax and do nothing.
In life you either learn from the mistakes of others,or others will use your own experience to learn a life lesson..so since they allowed pre-marital sex which led to pregnancy,they should bear the consequences by looking for a job and train their kids.
Wishing you and them all the very best..
@MARTINS
Martins si no "wishing you and them all the very best"🤣🤣
DeleteI wish them well too 🤣🤣
@Gifty😀😀;wetin I wan talk na
DeleteThe three ladies simply allowed the pregnancy happen because of their greed.
From the little writeup above,you can put together that the posters family are comfortable,hence the greed for who will carry her late Bros child.
Abi you don see where three ladies dey drag poor man pikin dey tell am "we are pregnant for you?".
It's a free world;but You can't enjoy an action and later want to run away from it's consequences.
#Shalom😊
@MARTINS
If they are old enough to mess around with him, they should own up to their responsibility.
ReplyDeleteThe only thing you owe them is the children portion when you sell the family house.
One of you have to stand up to them and get them to stop disturbing your mum, you can never satisfy their need.
Felicity
Dear Poster,
ReplyDeleteAccept my condolences on the loss of your brother...May his soul rest in peace....You all did well in advising the ladies about your brother...They made the adult decision to become pregnant and that should not be yours or your mom's headache....
Another question on my mind, how sure are you that your brother is the real father of the children from the 3 days...For me, the ladies have nothing on you guys and totally your prerogative if you want to extend the relationship with the ladies....For me that will be them making demands from your family any now and then because of the children.......I will recommend you all maintain boundaries with them.....
I wish you the very best and quick recovery to your mom.....
All the best
I had this question too. DNA tests are pricey and to do it three times is maybe too much🙆🏾♀️
DeleteYou must tell them upfront that they are one of many pregnancies that he left behind, so whatever help they could have gotten will be far decreased because it has to be split three or more ways. He obviously was not one to speak truth and sold them a dream to get into their pants, they have to wake from their dreams now.
ReplyDeleteIf he left a bank book then whatever is in it can be split among them. It is unrealistic to expect a grandparent to take on the full financial responsibility of three newborns no matter the comforts the family may be perceived to have, unless your family is extremely wealthy and can shoulder such a responsibility, which it doesn’t seem like. They must seek out charities for unwed mothers living on a low income to get some help. They have to look to their own families too. It is awful that he was a deceiver and they built their futures on sand and a sweet tongue but your mum cannot be made responsible for his poor character. I hope your mother’s health does not deteriorate because of this, go visit as soon as you can or have her come stay with you for a bit.
You may want to consider putting out a newspaper alert of his shenanigans and that he died penniless, if your family can handle that. This action is not for everyone.
Poster. Please remove your mum from the location for sometime. They had sex without protection. 🙄🙄🙄
ReplyDeleteThe person that impregnated them is dead so they really shouldn’t be bothering your family. Just that if people ignore those kids now, endeavor to make sure you don’t go laying any sort claims to them in the future.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry for your loss. This is clearly a very difficult situation for your family. Take things step by step and try to protect your mum’s health and peace she needs it most. The children are innocent, so approach the matter with fairness and empathy, but set clear boundaries on what your family can reasonably handle. Wishing you strength and wisdom to navigate this.
ReplyDeleteIf you people can afford to take care of those children, then you people should be of help since your brother accepted the pregnancies while alive but they shouldn't be overstepping their boundaries since no one forced them especially where your mum is
ReplyDelete