Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative

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Thursday, September 23, 2021

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative

 Hmmm....






STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
ONE CHANCE HUSBAND




My husband is treating me with disdain.

 To buy provision for a breastfeeding mother is difficult for him. when people were visiting me, l used part of the money for our feeding, including provision. Now, he is with cash to provide, he is complaining of me squandering his money.


 l now buy sachet 3 in 1 Chocolate to drink tea and still buy the same for him. 
He gave me 1k to buy tea for breakfast and l bought bread of 450 for two days with Bournvita 2 pieces and 100 akara. 


He has started complaining of how l spend a lot, that l should have managed the 1k for morning and afternoon meal. I don't know how to manage food with a 5months baby boy. 

He says l spend money, but will buy smoked horse fish like thrice in the week. He likes it to be added in his soup. Ever since l married this guy, he has not added value to my life.

 l married him as an OND holder, but he couldn't help me to finish. I went for German language in Lagos, my Dad brought the cash for the training, though he couldn't finish the payment. l stopped, without writing exam of A1. 

Whenever l have money, he will be treating me alright, but once it finishes, l will automatically become a nuisance to him. 


l have tried my possible best to change him but his family told me that he is like that. How can a man not spend for his family? He wants me to be buying things in the street or preferably on credit. l dislike such things as my parents were totally against it. l have tried in this 5years of marriage. Till now, he didn't give me money for food, he just left. No provision, just 150 to buy tea and drink again.


 l want to leave him but where will l start from? l will basically go down to Lagos from Ibadan, cause l won't live here. He has the money but finds it difficult to spend. l bought the freezer, washing machine, cooking gas and burner, Plasma TV in the house. The cotton was changed immediately after marriage, and l spent 56k on that. I buy clothes for myself, he doesn't buy things for me. 

l gave him one Ankara to sew, but he has never done that for me. Now, that l am jobless, he has money and have started treating me like trash.





I am so shocked that I almost do not know what to say....

Where do you people meet these kind of men? Didn't you test him before Marrying him?

Since he wants to play smart, if you are sure he has money and is not giving even to buy food for his son, then I advice you with my full chest to start selling things in the house, sell the TV, the fridge and everything else you bought and save the monies for a rainy day otherwise he will throw you out one day if things continue like this and you will have nothing......

And please start looking for a Job so that you can stop being so dependent on him

77 comments:

  1. Yours is a husband that's stingy and it even sucks the more that you didn't know him very well before agreeing to marry such a deadbeat kinda man

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I stand with Stella on this one. Start selling off your properties and use the money to take care of you and your son. Stop cooking for him if he doesn't provide enough money. If you still want to continue with that marriage it's up to you... because that one no be marriage. The scripture says 1 will chase a thousand and 2 will chase ten thousand. If after 5 years you have not achieved anything in that sham of a marriage, not even to feed well for the sake of his son, then you didn't marry your husband, you married a destiny killer. Some men ehn...

      Delete
    2. Madam, all I will say is this if you have only one child now or two, go and do family planning. Do you know what it is? Don't you ever get pregnant again until you decide if you want to stay of leave. I repeat it again pregnancy baby cos I don't wantt to call him a useless man.

      Delete
    3. Poster please listen to SDK's advise.Sell everything you bought in the house and keep the money,if possible go back to your father's house until you get a job to take good care of yourself and your son.Give him space to reset his brain.

      Delete
    4. Stella remember one of the spontaneous post, one anonymous wrote that He/she stylishly asked her boyfriend for money or proposing to test the boyfriend by demanding for money, see the insults that followed that anonymous commenter.

      You asking the poster didn't she test him. I'm having mixed feelings about your statement..

      The next day spontaneous post another He/She posted that her boyfriend has started reducing the money wey him dey give her.. See insults that followed the poster also. Someone even said the law of diminishing return has set in.

      Some Women are really suffering either way...


      Poster, Stella has given you reasonable alternative.. Good luck..



      Lovelace

      Delete
    5. Exactly what Stella said, since you bought those things with your money sell them and leave. You're better off single, without a man cause right now, you're still fending for yourself and that of your child.

      Delete
    6. Stella, exactly what was on my mind, Poster start selling those items you bought and you need to go for family planning if you have not.

      Delete
  2. Selfish Man.. if truly he has that money and he's doing like this.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Seriously I feel for you poster.. just like Stella said.. dust yourself and look for tangible job to cater for yourself and your baby.. God will come through for you

    ReplyDelete
  4. Ije แปฅwa. Nne may God help you because this one na correct one chance ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ™†

    ReplyDelete
  5. Poster try and get a job. That's the beginning of liberation from your husband

    ReplyDelete
  6. May we not marry ‘wickedness’ as spouses!

    A man that can/will not provide for his family is not a man. Period!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Na wa.....o, some men though,you can leave for your sanity, this one no be am abeg

    ReplyDelete
  8. Continue running around all blogs ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anon are you the husband,you better change o and treat your wife right.

      Delete
    2. Are you the husband? If yes, then shame on you. Tueh!!!!!!!

      Delete
    3. 15:15, idiotic husband or whomever you are.

      I know you are related to this Woman.

      If you like don't change, your karma.

      Delete
    4. Some women are really eating potopoto in marriages. Lord have mercy on your children.

      Delete
  9. I find your comment funny Mrs Korkus ๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜‚ and at the same it's the plain truth

    ReplyDelete
  10. Na wa!!! madam just find work asap and take care of yourself. such men do not change at all. the only thing they understand is me, myself and I.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Poster now that you know you married a selfish and wicked one, what's the plan for you? So you mean you want to continue living your life on his own terms?
      Na born you born, you no sick. If you were working for someone/an organization, you would have resumed back to work by now.
      Go out there and scout for a job!!!
      Put your child in a Creche, start earning money and this time around don't spend 1 kobo on him, let it be 'every man for himself'.
      In fact stop cooking, do only when he drops sufficient money.
      If he drops 1k, cook food worth 1k for him.
      Bone him and never EVER share a common purse with him, that one is destined to run you down if you let him.

      Delete
  11. Stella you advice her with your full chest to start selling properties in the house.

    These man will beat her blue and black.

    Poster pack yourself and the properties.when your horseband is not around
    Sell them and use it to start something.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Stingy husband from the pit of hell.
    He is stingy to a fault.

    May God fix it for you dear....

    ReplyDelete
  13. Tell him that you can’t produce milk anymore for the baby caused by malnutrition. Is he willing to starve his baby too?

    Since you ve been with him for 5 years and know his character, you should have prepared yourself for situations like this by saving. Why should you even let him know when you have money?

    I feel so bad for that precious baby, I pray things get better for you soon.

    ReplyDelete
  14. I pray for GOD's wisdom for you

    Some men like women broken financially and at their mercy

    WOMEN STOP EMOTIONALLY FOLLOWING MEN

    Follow only spiritually and with wisdom( watch & pray)

    Your emotions mean nothing to a hollow hearted person , it is even a weakness they can manipulate to do what they want to you ( destroy, suck dry, use)

    Friendliness to a crocodile doesn't mean you will not be lunch

    Pretending it is a bunny
    Wanting it to be a bunny
    Trying to change it into a bunny

    Can never make it so

    Even some old people are calm now because age has made their crocodile teeth fall out, dem no fit move again na only crocodile tears remain. The reptile eye still dey na old age don quieten dem and maybe lack of funds

    P.S
    Do not ever believe you can change A FULL GROWN ADULT who sees nothing wrong in what they are doing. It is a LIE Repeated so often unthinking people swallow it hook line & sinker

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Poster please you cannot change a full grown man please! It is not in your place..His parents should have done that not you abeg...You have married a stingy man and you cannot change them...I will say it again 5 CHARACTER TRAITS TO AVOID a. Hot tempered person b. Stingy person c. Envious/Jealous person d. Proud/Haughty person e. Chronic Liar....Please avoid such people...

      Delete
    2. Jet li your head dey there. Why marry someone and start praying that they change!. Anything you see before marriage will be worse after!. We should all work to heal our trauma and be the best version of ourselves before marriage

      Delete
    3. 15:52 chai! You fit share this with dnke white o before she enter apagu
      ..

      Delete
  15. Madam l am sorry to say you caused your problem by your action of buying the necessary equipments in the house within 5 years of marriage. Most men do not appreciate this kind gesture. They will automatically abandon running the house to you with the conviction that 'my wife is able' once you finish wining your child get a job no matter how small. When you start another job, learn to save your own money for times like this. No need leaving the marriage. You have known that immediately your husband see any money with you, he will not rest till he spends it all. Use wisdom. Your husband must not know how much you earn.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. With nigerian men never let them know you have any money.

      Delete
  16. There are men who resent women, hate them even (misogynists) yet want the fruits of women ( children, cook, nanny, housekeeper, public image polisher) so with disdain and fake tolerance marry them

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Two already commented bashing the poster. Alas who born the men, women... As they say who go rotten, go rotten no matter the upbringing...



      Lovelace



      Delete
  17. Honestly where do you meet these type of trash? Is it by force to be married? As you are like this, are you happy and fulfilled? Ehn?
    Marriage that is not adding one single iota of value to your life na tribulation. Let me just tell you straight.
    Imagine 'Cowbell 100 naira, bread 450, candle 20 naira', horsefish 345 naira...buahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ
    Una be small pikin? When you are not in university calculating what to eat before night class...
    Better get rid of that nonsense tying down before your life becomes as meaningless as this government.
    And na dem govdey screech 'submission! Submission! like dying goatsxwhen they don't know their left foot from the back of their anus. Mrsheew.

    *which one is horse fish???

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anon ๐Ÿ™†๐Ÿพ‍♀️๐Ÿ™†๐Ÿพ‍♀️๐Ÿ™†๐Ÿพ‍♀️๐Ÿ™†๐Ÿพ‍♀️

      Delete
  18. Very wicked man,and he will still want to sleep with you,tufia.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Imagine walking on eggshells to even eat food in your own home.

    This man does not love you, nobody who loves another treat them like this. He wants the title of husband and father for respectability sake, but does not want the responsibility attached with the title.

    My dear, even with your little credential you need to seek a way to earn your own money. If you cannot find work in a company then you will have to look into business opportunities that you can do. You can continue your German language training through You Tube, there are also apps like Duolingo which can help and there are some free apps out there that can help you. Learning a new language does not require money, it just require commitment. This man is nothing to write home about, so please start investing in yourself. If you come across money keep it for yourself and your child. Since he says you are spending too much, start buying the bottom of the barrel items that don't taste good and keep something for yourself. I know a dollar is dollar in any country, but that 1000 naira he is moaning so much about is only $2 in the abroad, I don't know where $2 will be able to carry three ppl for breakfast meals for three days, if you are breastfeeding you need more food than normal to sustain both you and the child. This man wants you to under eat so he can be well fed and content. This is a kind of hell that is insidious and almost invisible. Then he wants you to get a reputation as local borrowing woman who always need to pay late, not him.

    Don't go out of your way to do anything more than you need to and if you are shopping, shop rock bottom dirt cheap and keep the saving for yourself. Let him eat grass if needs be. He ain't ready for a wife or child. Pushing penis doesn't make you a man.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Sorry poster but he will never change!

    I was talking with my friend today, she was complaining that the money she lent her sister in law have not yet been returned, i have told her to forget about the money because her sil is married to a man like your husband. She is struggling, whether she and her kids have eaten does not concern him, school fees nko? Whossai!

    Whenever her folks gives her money, he becomes sweet till it finishes.

    They don't care, if you want to remain in the marriage just know that you are on your own.

    ReplyDelete
  21. This is what I keep telling you ladies everyday.

    Build yourself financially before getting married and give birth to the number of kids you can take care of single handedly, but most of you will never listen.

    I would have tell you to pack the things you bought and leave, but it is obvious you are not financially capable to carry out the plan.

    Just manage until you are financially ready. But that your husband na very useless and wicked man.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What are you talking about? She's not financially capable yet she bought virtually all the electrical appliances and other stuff in the house.

      Just one kid and you're blaming her? Instead of apportioning blames to the infidel of a man she got her self entangled with, you're busy blaming her...

      Delete
  22. I find it difficult to empathize with women like you. It is a given that you ladies do not appreciate good men, especially those easy going , quiet and introverted men. Most of you rubbish men who are kind and compassionate. They are mostly seen as week. The so called bad boys shift your pants easily and most of you prefer them. Imagine the idiot giving you 150 for breakfast. Don't delude yourself into thinking he will change, the earlier you leave that marriage the better for you. Leave with everything you bought. Most tightfisted people do not change, stop wasting your time.

    ReplyDelete
  23. don't leave your marriage, just know how to handle him, pretend you don't have as well even when you do. When he does not drop, don't make food for him, chop and clean your own mouth too, make we de look ourselves, it's time too be selfish as well,
    When you have money, hide it, keep face like person wey no see shishi, too some of these men, doing good wife no de work for them ooo, maybe as you are spending, made him relax which shouldn't be though, so handle him as he take present himself, na wetin he turn you too he go take abuse you tomorrow, be wise, don't leave.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What’s the point of being in a situationship you are not happy in? Is the world not hard enough?

      Delete
    2. The world is hard enough ooo, but she is not financially bouyant to leave, she can still work on it so far violence is not involved yet, she just needs wisdom.
      Leaving to a friend's house or even your family house will cause mockery, you will be welcomed a few days like a visitor, the following week you are no longer welcomed.
      Also start looking for what to do that does not require huge capital to start up, does not require you leaving your baby at the creche wch will gulp money again, just something you can do from home if office job no show face yet.
      Don't leave, at least not now,

      Delete
  24. You can go visit your family for now to be able to feed well. Health wise, you are not in a good place with your baby. Visit any of your family that can accommodate you for a month. Give him space and take care of yourself.

    When you are strong enough, get a job to sustain your life but don't get pregnant until you are in a better place.

    ReplyDelete
  25. It’s not by force to remain in that marriage. You came, you have seen and now that you have conquered, go back home. You already have a child. Go and look for something to do that will sustain you and that child. Leave that Man alone. E nor go change.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Poster I feel for you the Lord is your strength, you need strength to love your self now like never before, please try to look for a job and live as a human being (woman) that you are
    Take care of yourself and your baby. Be strong God will surely come through for you.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Poster I am sure that your family took care of wedding bills and everything. No be today that man dey treat you like this but you refused to pull out when you could.

    That's how my friend family sponsored her wedding 100% from food to clothing. Na only 50 Naira bride price and few items oga come with. Today she keeps complaining her husband doesn't provide and she does all the house and school fees expenses.Today she is considering divorce.

    This type of men plenty outside and women dey marry them because they feel he will change.
    Poster it is well with you o

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmshe is still 'considering'???? LEEMAO

      Delete
  28. Shebi if a woman is complaining that her boyfriend is stingy,you all will judge her that she should face front and stop being dependent lol this is the exact thing the poster is going through,maybe during the time when they were dating she never asked for money and he never gave her and she thought in marriage he will be different,now its 5 years and he can't take responsibility of just feeding tueh...My dear poster go look for a job and when you start making money don't give to him because he doesn't deserve it

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Na why I dey always laugh them ‘team independence women’. It can never be me. Never!

      Delete
    2. Abi o. If the lady is single, she would have been insulted. Look at this one naw.

      Single ladies, if he's stingy, it's a BIG RED FLAG. Don't let anyone deceive you or manipulate you into thinking your eye is too big or you're too materialistic.

      Delete
  29. That man is stingy and doesn't love you.he's a destiny destroyer.
    Pls look for a job and take care of yourself,that man can never change.

    ReplyDelete
  30. This is sad, poster may God give you wisdom to handle this situation. Just have it at the back of your mind that you are on your own.

    ReplyDelete
  31. Hummm. So sorry about what you are going through poster. God will come through for you.
    I am in a similar situation right now and I really want out because I am so tired. I have 3kids and hubby doesn't bring anything to the table, not even #1. Although he lost his job 3yrs ago and has refused looking for another job due to pride. At times he blamed it on HBP that he is unfit to do any work now. I am into biz and take care of our feeding and clothing. Its noting to me really, God has been faithful to me in biz. Option of me leaving the marriage is out of it unless he decides to leave because I built the house we are staying with my own money. The house is in my name and he has refused to let me be and just go his own way. He abuses me emotionally with harsh words on a daily basis and says he wont leave and i cant leave my property for him so as to be free. I am so confused.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Abeg, don't let him kill you with arsh words. If you can afford to rent a place for now,do please,when hunger hammer him,he'll find his way. Life is to short to be spent unhappy.

      Delete
    2. Dem no dey sell already built house?
      But then, when he had a job, was he not playing his role in taking up responsibilities? If he was, then your case is different from poster's.

      Delete
    3. So you can't sell the house? Stay there now.

      Delete
  32. My dear take Stella's advice with your full chest and the chest of all bloggers here. Don't cook for him again. If he brings money cook, if he doesn't don't!!! Eat out with your son and maintain.

    ReplyDelete
  33. After, if you ask your boyfriend for money, some over-woke people will call you "entitlement mentality".

    Na from boyfriend you dey take know husband wen stingy or the one wen go take care of him family.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You dey mind them

      Delete
    2. Your moniker saya it all anyway, don't go and work for your money.

      Delete
  34. What are you still doing there? This was exactly my experience.with my mom's help,I left d hell of a marriage @ 14months with a 4months old baby.i made sure he left for work and I packed every pin I bought with my money.its been 5yrs,my child and I are doing well.Guy man will starve me while breastfeeding.i was so hungry and lean yet he insisted on exclusive breastfeeding for d child.my story no be here ooo.madam poster please leave,he will never change

    ReplyDelete
  35. The man is just intentionally callous. Poster sell all those things you bought as Stella said and use the money to start small business no matter how little just make sure you can fend for yourself and your baby.

    ReplyDelete
  36. Go to your father's house with your child

    ReplyDelete
  37. What Stella said is what I have in mind. I'll sell all those appliances I got with my money jare. Nonsense and ingredients

    ReplyDelete
  38. And when we all shout leave,leave..To where exactly that you won't spend your own money too.Did you discuss your finance and income before marriage,your roles as a wife and his.But even at that,leaving or selling off things is not the solution.You need to get your Priority first.
    Get a job
    Put your child in a creche
    Speak up to him and let him know his roles as a man
    And you as his support system know your place in a home.Prov:31
    Marriage is sweet when both parties have an income
    You wont have a TV to watch or fridge to use because of a MAN...God forbids he dies today,will your life end

    ReplyDelete
  39. Love is not selfish,make it work.When we stop going into marriage as a liability,then marriage will work

    ReplyDelete
  40. You as a woman,what dreams do you have for yourself,your life,..I see SDK buy things for her kids,give things to people she has never even seen before..Imagine not having her own dreams.You as a person first before the home.

    ReplyDelete

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