Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative..

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Friday, April 19, 2024

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative..

Hmmm....


STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
COMPLICATED SITUATION

In 2019, shortly after our initial meeting, my prospective in-laws reneged on their willingness to marry off their daughter due to ethnic tensions. Despite attempts at reconciliation, they remained steadfast, and we ultimately parted ways. 
Similarly, in 2022, my plans for an introduction with the family of another woman were thwarted by her persistently unpleasant behaviour, which did not sit well with me and my family.

My parents cautioned me against introducing a partner to my home until we were certain that our relationship had progressed beyond the dating stage, and both parties were committed to moving forward as a couple. As the second youngest sibling and a self-sufficient individual with my parents and a few cousins residing with me, I understood and respected their stance. It's only reasonable that responsible parents would prefer not to have their child randomly bring numerous potential partners home before settling into a committed relationship with marriage decision.
This principle influenced my decision to end my relationship with my newest girlfriend shortly after Valentine's Day this year. Despite embarking on a long-distance relationship in February 2023 devoid of s#xual intimacy, she resorted to emotional manipulation and blackmail. She insisted on visiting me for a week, expecting me to cover her travel expenses, but I stood firm in suggesting that she arrange her own accommodation while I covered other expenses during her stay in Lagos. I stressed the importance of slowing down our relationship's pace to foster a deeper connection and ensure we were both making rational decisions.

Despite my girlfriend's persistence, I reluctantly agreed to her visit, with the caveat that my family's opinion would ultimately have a strong influence on our future. As I cannot make such decisioj without family parental approval.

 Unfortunately, her week-long stay proved to be tumultuous, and my parents and a few friends who came around perceived her as insincere, domineering, and manipulative - traits that had already raised concerns for me. While acknowledging that no relationship is perfect, it's imperative to address and work through any areas of concern before committing to marriage.

During my prior four visits to her base in Abuja, she insisted that I should have a reason other than coming to see her for visiting, as she couldn't accommodate me due to her family's presence living with her. I complied with her wishes, arranging my own accommodation and adhering to our boundaries and our mutual decision to abstain from s#x until our relationship's trajectory became clearer and well pronounced.

Now, she contacts me sporadically to hurl insults and slander, tarnishing my reputation among her friends, family - people whom I've never met. Many of the protective measures we agreed upon were initiated by her, aligning with my desire for a relationship built on mutual respect and commitment. Despite my brother's suggestion to pursue legal action against her for threats and blackmail, I believe it's unnecessary, as I never made any promises to her or took advantage of her in any way.
Adults should understand that relationships don't always culminate in marriage unless both parties are intentional, invested, and actively participate in its progression. A stagnant, passive approach is unlikely to yield positive results.

Stella, I implore you to be generous with the scrutiny of your blue pen, in case I have inadvertently offended this woman. I've inquired about my transgression, yet she has failed to specify any wrongdoing on my part. I've even proposed compensating her if she feels wronged and entitled, although I neither acquired nor appropriated anything from her. It's worth noting that we're both single parents.

I will comment whichever day this is published, thank you.


Hmmmmm, your story is too perfect..... You did nothing at all and she is reacting like this?You did not state her age, it would have helped to know some things....
If this story is exactly as you have narrated then something is wrong....cant you block her number and her social media handles?.....cut off anyone and everyone that knows her?Take a walk from her life and take a good look in ward and work on yourself...I do not believe that you are without flaw and I believe you may have contributed to her reacting this way.
You also need to stop letting your familydo what they did with this lady or you will never marry......They had no right to put her on the hot seat and you had every right to protect her but you did not......who will not make mistake under the scrutiny of prospective in laws?
Try to make peace with her and not talk about compensating her if she feels wronged and entitled.
And why is a grown axx man livinig with his parents?.....get somewhere else to stay if you did not build that house....Abi where will you live with your wife? And how will your girlfriend visit you to see if you have red flags or not?

83 comments:

  1. Firstly, you need to realize that you and solely you are in charge of every trajectory of your life. As much as peoples views and opinions may matter, they remain just that and import should seldom be paid to them. Every conviction must come from within.

    The stance of your family is ideal. Why bring a partner in a relationship that has not yet been defined to them?

    Your situation is by no means complicated. You owe no one nothing and neither does anyone owe you a thing as far as a dating relationship without commitment is concerned. The present lady in question has no business in your life and neither do you in hers. Cut her off and never look back. You can't deal with that level of toxicity. I assure you.

    I sense a bit of rigidity in your approach to dating. Some form of flexibility never hurts. Try not to be so exacting. It is easy to fall into that without realizing. Overall though, it will be beneficial if you get your own place away from your folks. It will broaden your horizon, deepen your depth of understanding and you will see things in clearer light. Plus few ladies look too fondly on a man who still stays with his parents.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Rigid? Not at all, I'm incredibly flexible. However, I won't dismiss your advice; it's greatly appreciated. Thank you.

      Delete
    2. The English is very heavy for me!
      You must be very educated.
      I couldn't read up to half

      Delete
    3. Poster you be like sabi sabi. It seems like na your family dey control you. Anyhoo I wish you all the best as you find someone more compatible with you and your family. I agree with Stella's blue biro.

      Delete
    4. 19:11不不不不不

      Delete
    5. Poster, the best thing for you is: quite the long distance relationship thing. It won't be suitable for you. Thank God you were able to discover the red flags in the lady before marriage. The long distance relationship will make you not to discover many things until you marry. You may have your own flaws which you didn't mention here. What triggered her to start raining insults on you and tarnishing your image?

      Delete
    6. @ poster, I don't think I can date someone like you. I might be wrong, but you seem to be the controlling type with no mind of his own. I actually feel that the lady is better off without you!

      Delete
  2. From what you narrated up there you haven't wrong this lady.But where I see the problem is your family interfering in your relationships.When you get married,is this how they will be meddling in your marriage?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Dear poster, all I read is your parents, her rules and your parents some more.
    My question is; what do you want? Start from there.
    For your ex, she will be okay with time. But try to work on yourself before dating any other woman.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's not exactly a family intervention, as you described it. Sometimes, one simply needs to trust your host judgment regarding their own relatives. Perhaps we haven't fully grasped our own qualities and characteristics. Sometimes, caution is necessary when navigating steep hills or descending slopes. But rest assured, my family is close-knit. I make my own decisions. Nonetheless, thank you; I understand your concern stems from a place of love.

      Delete
  4. Relocate your parents from the building or you pack to another apartment. Every step your visitor, male or female makes will be scrutinized and talked about in the family. As the bread winner, the intention of your family is to protect you and your interest but that has to happen from some distance.

    Good luck.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Allow me a chuckle, that was a good attempt. Thank you for the advice; I recognize it was given with love in mind.

      Delete
    2. Why is almost everybody blaming parents and siblings? From what I can deduce from his writeup, the parents didn't trigger anyyhing.

      Delete
  5. Oga go and marry your parents and siblings and cousins na

    Wetin be this abeg?

    How old are you please? Wait o, how if you have never met her folks and acquaintances, how did you hear the stories about tarnishing your image?

    I perceive there is bomb in you people's head, my family said this and that.Osino legal action!! 不不不

    Mr. Goody two shoes

    Gifty

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 不, as in eehn this chronicle tire me sef..I couldn't even finish reading it, my parents this my parents that. Habamana!! Grow up Mr Man .

      Delete
    2. My sister. Him and his family are terrible people. Even if he eventually marries someday, his family's nosey interferance will scatter the marriage. Mr man, u are not ready for marriage.

      Delete
    3. He also likes speaking English I can see 不不不, he is one of those over sabi men. He is a silent “ do me I do you kind of person “, from that his statement that the girl should take care of her transportation and accommodation since he did same on his visit. Oga you never ready for marriage Abeg remain single. Woman go suffer for you and your family hand.

      Delete
    4. It's not feasible to chronicle every detail here. Nonetheless, I concur with you. Thank you for the cautionary advice; I acknowledge it was given with love.

      Delete
    5. @17:17, I actually agree with his thought process. I am an advocate of no premarital sex and if you really analyze it, relationships in Nigeria are transactional. Thus, couples who really want to obey God have to have a non-financial-based relationship. The lady shouldn't expect $$$, and the man shouldn't expect sex. If lady accepts gifts, be sure to gift him as well, so no one feels cheated and so on. If you must obey the Lord, be ready to carry a cross of some sort.

      However, I also agree with you that Oga has to show that he is ready, by impressing the girl or her family financially. In Nigerian culture they want to see that you are not stingy and you can care for their daughter. So it can only work with a couple that has wisdom and truly love each other

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    6. @Poster, your style of writing is too formal, sounds like GPT 4, very mechanical. I hope you don't speak like this, 'cause you will bore the h** l outta people...onto the matter at hand, let the lady go, block her number and wait for your parents to approve the next lady you bring home! Good luck!

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    7. Anon 17:17 na that part wey him say he won't take care of her accomodation and transport fare together nai off me. Poster, this your transactional kind of relationship is what I can't deal with. For the family, I didn't see where they are at fault.

      Delete
    8. 20:20 what the friggin fack. Who told you that a woman and man in a godly standard relationship will not receive $$$ if they are not giving sex. What da fack. What then is love if you can't give? Please you people should stop making rules that never existed in the bible. Love started from the bible and genuine Christians know how to appreciate their spouse even without involving in sexual imorality.

      Delete
  6. Poster you never ready to marry. Why are you still living in your parents house???? All these things you typed up here is too much you are complicating things for yourself! Try and date properly, know each other then take it up from there! Soon you will be older so avoid stores that touch!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, Nkiru, I adore reading your comments whenever you post. Your critique was a tad stern, but I value it greatly.
      I believe my late son's mother used to have you as a friend, we were in the US then - if you're residing in Scandinavia now, then it must be you. However, I could be mistaken.

      Delete
    2. 17:46, Nkiru resides in Scandinavia, Sweden precisely, so she may be the one. Sorry about your son's mother

      Delete
  7. All I will say here is that, when the signs and red flags are so glaring during courtship, pls never compromise your stand. Take a walk and never look back.

    Do not love based on emotions, sympathy or whatever other than sincere love and compatibility.

    In 2011, a lady told me unless I didn't marry her, that she will so deal with my sister just cos my sister told her about her acts that was wrong.

    That was the day I knew that relationship won't sail any further.

    © TEEJAY

    ReplyDelete
  8. Poster please first off, don't do that testing thing with parents to access someone's behaviour or seeking your family's approval for someone you want to marry...It doesn't show maturity if you need your parents to give you a nod in making every life decision....And I agree with your parents; you don't just bring any random girl to the house, let there be a establishment and your relationship has advanced to something serious that would lead to the altar...

    When you visited her in Abuja; it is a given that you cannot sleep over the house but to hang out with your friend or book a hotel....

    She is only pained that you were not there to protect and defend her when she made the 1st visit to her place hence the insults though I am not justifying her action...

    What are you compensating her for exactly? Did you promise her marriage. If no, then don't pay if not you will bring yourself into blackmail and once in, you can never pay your way out until something drastic happens...Nip it in the bud now and still engage a lawyer for advice; table everything and don't hold back anything information to help you make the best decision...Don't take threats with levity especially with things of the heart....

    I hope you have learnt your lessons and please get your own accomodation even if it is one room apartment for now.....Most ladies won't take a man serious who still lives with his parents and siblings; the only exception for me is if your mother or father are the only surviving parent.

    Please do some self - reflection and build some self-awareness..Gain lessons from this experience so you can make better decisions...

    All the best

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Phoenix

      Delete
    2. To make it easier, you can get an accomodation with a BQ, say 2 bedroom BQ where your parents can stay and you live in the main house. They can come around frequently and still give you your privacy.

      Delete
  9. Personally, i will Not date a guy living in same house with his family except its a medical/health necessity. It's a HUGE red flag.
    Secondly, A guy whose folks have the final say on our relationship is another red flag. Don't misconstrue me; We need the blessings of our parents but not His parent's deciding for him abeg No.

    She will be alright. Give her time and she will move on.

    ReplyDelete
  10. The poster comes across as a meticulous individual and somewhat self aware. I’ll encourage you to reflect on the recently ended relationship and the previous ones. If you see any similarities, you/your family’s approach might need some tweaking. The truth is no matter how long and intentional a courtship process is, there will always be points of difference. These seem larger particularly when your partner is stacked against a host of family members.
    I think it’s wrong for her to hurl insults or resort to blackmail (if what you say is true). It was wise to not engage in intercourse but what content does she have that makes her think blackmail would work? Usually anything that spoils requires at least 2 parties to totally break down. I wish you peace and healing. If she continues, call her bluff. Let her do her worst, sadly women usually have more to lose in relationship matters because the cards are stacked against us. Blackmail is nonsense that I don’t like!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Poster, take the above advice seriously. I will add a few points to it because I was (am) in this type of situation.
      1. Don't allow your siblings or parents make I finally decision on who to marry. They can make their observations known to you and you will take the final decision. But know that nobody is perfect. Therefore, try to get at least 60% expectations from a woman because you aren't perfect either.
      2. You don't owe that lady anything. If don't feel comfortable about a relationship take a walk away and have peace.
      3. No matter how you love your parents and siblings, try and get another apartment when you are prepared to marry. Even if it is a smaller one. It is even to protect your family more rather than your woman because many women can pretend in their presence and take all their "wahala" but will sting them when she enters because of ''See finish" syndrome. (Note: I am speaking from a 14 years' experience of leaving together with extended family though in a different apartment but same compound)
      4. Try and protect your woman all the time. Don't discuss her flaws with your family. And don't discuss your family's flaws especially your mum with wife. Try and make excuses for their mistakes.
      5. Finally, marriage is not as easy as people thing. It requires wisdom, discipline and in overall God's continually presence. I wish you the best in your relationship and eventually married life.

      Delete
  11. Simply put: Our guy depends on family to take or make decisions. The man sounds like a thorough person and believe me, you can only do well with a strict born again virgin. You don't have a say in your own relationship and looking for the perfect lady to make your parents happy is just plain childish. From your write-up it seems you doing okay for yourself, just wait for the right born again lady.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Leave all these babes and go look for one white babe, you won't go through these sort of stress. Naija ladies and stress are 5&6. Just try a white babe and come back with your testimony, that I can assure you. Nothing trumps peace of mind.


    Dibia Arusi

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Try a white lady and end up being a simp! You think white ladies will tolerate the toxic masculinity you lot display on here? @Dibia

      Delete
    2. Na so one man talk. Later na the white lady kpai am. Eyaaa

      Delete
    3. Just as Justin Deen abi Dean don become Nigerian stereotyped man because he was married an original Nigerian.
      Some men and womenirrspective of race or nationality can mind bend their partners

      Delete
  13. Stella I don’t think his parents live with him
    They came around during her visit

    Poster when you comment state your data do interested ladies can reach out

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He clearly stated that his parents and few relatives live with him.

      Delete
  14. Poster, you are not being truthful.
    No woman would treat you this way without a solid reason.

    Sluttychic.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Single parenting is always difficult for two single parents ,why not look at a single without any attachment or a widow with less baggage

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That is not their issue here. Did you read the story?

      Delete
    2. So he should burden a single lady with no child at all? Nigerian men are not a prize

      Delete
  16. Poster, hear very well.
    No relationship with a woman ends without the man being at fault unless she leaves for a man far better. In fact, the more bitter the woman who leaves after a short relationship, the more happier the man should be that he dodged a vengeful woman. So, do not let the bitterness of the woman seep into you. Let her go. As already advised, block her as much as you can and ignore her on other media you cannot block her.

    This is one reason it is advisable to start your next relationship with a telephone number you do not use for business or work. A number you can shut down without loss.

    The Only point here is that you should plan to move or move out of your family home or rent a new place for them if you can afford it. If you cannot afford it, then conduct your next friendship, dating, courtship outside your home. Then do not bring the woman to your family until settled on marriage as you have been advised.

    Majority of today's women do not want husband's family and parents around during courtship or marriage. That is the selfish part of the typical woman. Know that and know ease in courtship.

    The good thing is that you and a woman do not need to spend even a day or night in your home for each of you to know yourselves better or see the so call "red flags". Married men know that not all you see, you are allowed to see, and or you are shown during courtship is true in marriage.

    If you open your eyes and ears, you can tell who a man or woman is from day one meeting. Courtship was not started by us today. There was a time men and women married from their parents homes and sleep overs were not allowed.

    You must, however, know that telling a woman your family has a big say on whether you will marry her or not is a CAPITAL NO. Even if that is the truth for you, DO NOT ever tell a woman that. This why you should know a woman well and that she is good enough for you outside of your family circle. You will be then be in a better position to answer questions on her behalf and explain and deflect as necessary before or after the family meet.

    It is good for family to advise on a prospective in-law. But such advice must be factual. If it is not factual, and you are the bread winner of the family, then Bro shine your eyes. Maybe your family do not want you to marry because everybody knows your marriage will cut or limit your supply to your family.

    Let the bygone woman be. She is pained because she thought she had met her man and you may actually be the best she has gotten until your family involvement. Men rarely win in after-relationship battles or war with a woman. Such battles/war are women's forte and one of the privileges some societies worldwide has bestowed on women.

    Go start afresh.
    You appear to want financially stable and involved women. Therefore, stop wasting time on women (like the bygone woman) outside that league .
    Keep your family out of it.
    Study to know the woman by yourself.
    Take your woman home only when you are agreed on the substance of planned married life.
    Listen to family advice but Be the final decider and let her see that.
    Take responsibility for your marriage related decisions if you want really to be married.
    Best wishes.

    By the way, I am a male and married.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fantastic piece of advice

      Delete
    2. It is not selfish to prevent unnecessary interference from nosy family who mostly never see you as part of them

      Delete
  17. All these big grammar so is your parents that will be controlling every move and decisions you make, I dislike men who don't stand on their own.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Like!!!! Dude is just so annoying

      Delete
    2. Very annoying o @ Shooter. God forbid me to have anything to do with this kind of person.

      Delete
  18. The way you wrote this chronicle had the feel of a thesis and not a life experience. It is ok to relax at times and let your hair down, you do not have to be 'on' at all times. A man who can switch up to match the setting is far sexier and more appealing than one who is rigidly set in one way. That said, there is someone for everyone and the woman who loves a rigid man is out there too.

    I feel for you that you have not had much luck in love or securing a marriage, which seems to be something you desire. Perhaps using the services of a professional matchmaker will help you to meet someone aligned with your values and way of being. In the meantime, you can work on your financial security and spiritual life.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, poster you need to loosen up.

      Delete
    2. Stiff men are over sabi, uncorrectable, arrogant and unteachable with no sense of humour and boring

      Delete
  19. You're looking to get married and your parents and siblings live with you? It can never work!!

    Since you said you're doing well financially I suggest you leave them there and get another apartment. I think family interference is your relationship problems

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well said!
      Poster is quite rigid and he believes he's an excellent package for any lady.
      Poster RELAX a little. Life is not that hard

      Delete
  20. Please poster,leave that house or relocate your parents and siblings. So much interference. Cyberstalking,bullying and blackmailing are criminal changes. Tell her to back off,or you will report to the authorities.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Narcissistic men, we know ourself.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Thank you, Stella, for publishing my account. I will try to provide clarity whatever concern raised as I follow comments. I've never claimed to be flawless; I have my imperfections. However, in this particular instance, it wasn't so much about what I did or didn't do - that's just how it unfolded.

    She actually stayed in my upstairs suite, while there's a communal kitchen downstairs where everyone gathers for meals and family time. We all respect each other's boundaries, but family time takes precedence - it's how we connect and engage. Additionally, I don't reside with my parents; they reside with me. It's a spacious house with ample rooms, so why rent elsewhere? It's always lonely on one's own. And it's mine. I establish the rules within, but I can't disregard others' opinions, observations, and suggestions, especially when it concerns a relationship we're still trying to navigate. I may agree or disagree, but I must listen and take heed.

    No, I didn't intentionally test her, but she would naturally encounter and interact with these individuals as they reside with me. Hence, my suggestion for her to lodge nearby, similar to what she had me do when I visited. One invests in a relationship that's evolving with commitment, not one still finding its footing as we're still adjusting to each other.

    I believed that if I respected her desire to keep her family at bay until the relationship solidified, she should extend the same trust to me. Even though we're in a long-distance relationship, it requires delicate handling.

    What am I seeking? A woman who is open-minded and doesn't come with a strict set of rules. Such rigidity makes friendship tedious, let alone a romantic relationship.

    She is 38 years old, and I am 41. No, I don't make promises; instead, we invest the necessary work and effort if it's significant and the objective is mutual.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. please me a mail so that i can link you up with some good babes from this blog space, u no go regret am......no post your details

      Delete
    2. All right, Stella, let me ponder over it.

      You have a lovely space here, your blog pals are truly unique - that's what makes it enjoyable. Interestingly, my cousin is also a part of this community.

      I value every comment and welcome all forms of critique and criticism; I understand it comes from a place of care. Sending much love from my end as well to everyone.

      I won't overlook your offer, Stella; I'll give it some thought. In the meantime, I intend to take a break from relationships, as I did before this last one. It's been a few years since I lost my girlfriend and the mother of my son to a tragic accident. Furthermore, it's been 4yrs years since I was last involved in what seemed like a relationship but wasn't. That space can be chaotic, somewhat toxic and entitled; people are eager to enjoy the fruits without tending to the plant or caring for the surrounding grass.

      Delete
    3. Poster, pls listen to Stella. I had similar issues like yours. A friend that understands my peculiarity match-made me 12 years ago. I am enjoying my marriage with my parents and everyone leaving in peace.

      Delete
    4. Poster, as soon as I read your Chronicle, I could predict your age range. You write so much like my husband. I am impressed. Back to the case at hand, I guess due to your age, you might want to do things the traditional way but if you are religious in any way, I would advice you try someone from your religious setting and start with friendship to understand her personality before discussing marriage, that might sound odd based on your age but that might work for you. Dont put marriage out there first, you might come out as needy hence the behaviours you get from the ladies. Cheers.

      Delete
    5. Mr. Poster, remember to tell Stella to link you up with only financially stable women among the GOOD women on her list . Such women are less desperate or would feel less threatened in your circumstances.

      Delete
    6. From what I am reading from you now, you might want to work with a therapist as it appears you may be dealing with some sort of relationship trauma. If you don't deal with the root of the issues, there is a high likelihood of you projecting things on would-be partners that could end up tanking your relationships. This could happen without you being consciously aware of it. Also staying away from relationships is not always the best thing to do. You just learn how to move on if things are not working, and then let life flow. Being rigid could cause you to miss something really good. Being too careful, I think stems from your being a perfectionist. That is not a bad thing per se, but if not checked can ruin things. Also put it in mind that not all women will be okay with your current living conditions. If that is a deal breaker for you, then go for the one that truly wouldn't mind, or you can still change your mind and live on your own. All the best like I said.

      Delete
    7. Poster, you said that you don't want someone with a strict set of rules, but that is you in a nutshell. Very rigid, and like you said, such rigidity is a no no in a relationship. Like someone advised, you need to engage the services of a therapist to unearth whatever that's deeply affecting you.

      Delete
    8. Hmmmmm…. I’m not the ex girlfriend but I already dislike the poster as a boyfriend 不不不 I can only have this kind of guy as a friend. Please why are you still writing with “hence “….. your use of English is for writing essays and not for oral communication……please I hope this is not how you communicate ooh…

      Delete
    9. Yes he writes too formally, and while they say opposites attract I think you need someone who reasons just like you do, a conservative lady that shares your views and principles .

      Delete
    10. Poster is my kinda person.
      Well spoken, principled, and all that.

      Delete
  23. Poster am impressed. You love your and respect them to family to that extend ?. You are not the type that will throw your family in the mud bcos of a girl. And tomorrow those girls will be sleeping around with his friends . Marry a girl that will know her boundary not the one that want to know the family secret. I like people like you who knows what they wanted .

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Truly, I see nothing wrong in letting his parents stay with him. So long as there are extra rooms to accommodate them, why not bring them to stay with you if you if you can?

      Delete
  24. Poster, you appear to have a linear mindset or thinking pattern and not much in the way of experience, especially with women. None of this is a bad thing in my opinion but the lack of self-awareness could be considered a major hitch. You may wish to distance yourself from your family a little bit to understand yourself; and what you want and strengthen your voice. A man should be able to speak for himself and protect his woman especially from his family.

    Your lady friend

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  25. A relationship that is yet to be defined, why bringing your family members and why is visiting and accommodation a problem??
    Do you guys really know what courtship is all about!???

    ReplyDelete
  26. tumultuous! 不
    Not a funny chronicle, but I had a good laugh 不
    Poster, you're a lawyer, yes or yes?
    LLB lawyer ba?
    Weldone.
    Contunu

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Mine was "thwarted". I don't think I have ever seen that word in a chronicle before today and I have been an ardent follower about a decade now不不不

      The blog has a solid non-Nigerian following, is international, and appeal to ppl at all class levels.

      Delete
    2. Lol... your comment is funny!

      Delete
  27. Poster, Nwa Daddy and Mommy. You’re too difficult to live and be with. You have too much wahala and I pity the lady that will end up with you. Difficult family that finds fault in everything. Mr am too perfect. Please marry your parents and cousins.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly. I've had an encounter with someone like him. In fact, I recently ended the relationship barely one month of starting it. I just couldn't deal.

      Delete
    2. Difficult man who doesn't realise he and the entire clan (not just his parents) makes him a liability suitor

      Delete
  28. Poster it seems the lady likes you
    Maybe you should reconsider

    ReplyDelete
  29. A broken marriage is better than a broken relationship. It's better to take a walk now. Explain things to her. Write a long message if need be and part ways. I can smell the toxicity from here

    ReplyDelete
  30. So you will get married and bring her into that house filled with cousins and parents?
    Pls, from the beginning, always inform any lady you want to date, the number of relatives that live with you.
    I can't deal.

    ReplyDelete

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