Hmmmm.....
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
MIXED FAITH BROUHAHA
What is the best approach for a mixed-faith family in raising children? Precisely, Jehovah’s Witness (husband) and Pentecostal (wife).
Wife wants 50/50, let the children learn both, husband wants 100/0. Only JW teachings and doctrines.
He doesn’t even allow his wife to sing or pray with the kids, no celebrations at all.
For more clarity, he promised the wife that religion won’t be a problem before marriage but changed after marriage, especially the moment they started having kids.
What is wrong with your husband?why should he deceive you into Marraige and change the terms ?This issue is very sensitive and can break your marriage..
MIXED FAITH BROUHAHA
What is the best approach for a mixed-faith family in raising children? Precisely, Jehovah’s Witness (husband) and Pentecostal (wife).
Wife wants 50/50, let the children learn both, husband wants 100/0. Only JW teachings and doctrines.
He doesn’t even allow his wife to sing or pray with the kids, no celebrations at all.
For more clarity, he promised the wife that religion won’t be a problem before marriage but changed after marriage, especially the moment they started having kids.
What is wrong with your husband?why should he deceive you into Marraige and change the terms ?This issue is very sensitive and can break your marriage..
Agreeing to 50/50 means birthdays, Christmas and other forbidden things would be allowed..How in heavens name did you ever get to marry a Jehova's witness?Marriage only lasts with them if their spouses are of same faith..
My dear just start planning to be a single mum or agree to his terms...
If he is the bread winner in the house, i dont see you winning this!..
If the rest of his family is JH then you have no case....
Abi you give am kpekus before una marry wey make am lie to you?
SO SO SO SORRY FOR YOU!!!
Marriage is all about compromise and your husband is not willing to compromise! Makes me wonder what kind of husband you married.
ReplyDelete50/50 is so fair, at least until the kids grow and decide to choose their own preference.
I wish poster the best.
DeletePoster how far una take on blood transfusion
JW Do Marry Theirselves
ReplyDeleteHow Come You Open Your Pentecostal Eyes To Agree To Marry Him ...
Hmmmmmmm He Deceived You Chaiiiiiiii
Nah You Wear the Shoe If It's Tight Pull Am o.
Hello iya Boys
True o. Na dem dey marry themselves. You'll hardly see them marrying outside.
DeleteThat I understand how she got deceived and no one could wake up
DeleteMy Dear it's either you accept the 100/0 or you divorce.
ReplyDeleteJW is a faith,that Thier doctrines and belief is strict
Why did you even marry him,those people are so unromantic,how did he court you sef?
Did you guys go out? I am honestly curious.
I see them and I see strict,uptight people.
Life is already hard ,then you will now add JW spouses foreverðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜.
*Their
DeleteMaybe he's wealthy that's why she married him.
DeleteOmo!
ReplyDeleteWhy will any normal human being marry a JW.. people that puts their religious doctrines before human lives...
ReplyDeleteMy dear this marriage won't survive this war, either accept it and secretly teach your kids the truth about God or leave the marriage with them... simple
Hahahahahahaha. Honestly, e reach to ask. No blood transfusions, no birthdays, no celebration of Christmas and a whole lot of other things.
DeleteOne JW was very sick at a time and needed blood transfusion, nor be her clear eyes she take agree.
Wealth oo. Money talks
DeleteJW that know how to argue so much! They are always right. Even the ones that look weak as if they have no strength, the moment you start discussing your point of view in faith, you will be surprised how they have energy to counter what you say. And they can be so annoying going to knock on doors in group. When you say you are not interested, they would insist.
ReplyDeleteKnow this and know peace, if you are not Jehovah witness you have no business marrying them forget what they are saying b4 marriage. This is for both male and female they always act the same
ReplyDeleteIf you don't do what they say or join their believe the house become a living hell for the other partner. (Both male and female)
ReplyDeleteHonestly speaking Stella really hit the response right.
ReplyDelete@Poster,
The Ball is in your Court to either go by his terms or quit (if you know that it chokes your joy, peace, etc to unbearable limits). I have some of them as friends / colleagues. They will never take to your side at all. Rather, they will convince / confused you to their Religion.
Choose what's better for yourself.
But come to think of it, if you can surrender it all for him (NO_ celebrations, prayers, ...); and to seeing your children indoctrinated without options, no battery, he allows you to do as you choose (Partying, celebrating, pray, attend church services, etc): I will advise you to stay.
When the children are grown up, some of them will join you.
But if he disallows you to do as you desires, got you cages, ...NO BE ME GO TELL YOU WHAT TO DO.
@KSB TRUTH
Poster, your best bet is to allow him and let peace reign, why are you suddenly interested in your faith when you traded it off with 50-50 arrangement years back?!
ReplyDeleteI am not trying to victim-blame you but it is difficult to understand how supposed adults enter into fire just because they want to get married.
The dullest person on earth would know something like is bound to happen, you all just bring children into a confusion you willingly created because of your selfish reasons.
There is no difference between you and the lady whose chronicle was posted yesterday because she will want to claim being a victim in few years when the fruit of her decision is ripe if she choose to go ahead with the wedding.
If you all don't enter those marriages that come with terms and conditions, will you die?!
Felicity
Go with the flow
ReplyDeleteSis, you will pray oo, you chose a man of another faith. What is surprising to me about this chronicle is, if he's good for you to marry, why is he not good for your children to follow? You have made your bed, please pray for God’s intervention.
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteAbi she know no?
Your spouse is a staunch JW. Just know you can't win this. Either agree or divorce.
ReplyDeleteIf you are a believer in Christ JESUS and born again,then start praying.for God's mercy and redemption.
ReplyDeleteFor your children.
Aside God's intervention, nothing you say or do will.work.
Singles, beliefs and religion/non religion are an integral part of marriage. Love alone,can't sustain marriage ooo.
Choose your kind...
If your husband marries someone like me he would end up being frustrated that he would be the one writing chronicles to this blog. If you don't give me peace you won't have it. You can't tell me you agreed to something then later come and change your mind because you think I can't do anything about it. The way you would be flung to the curb will shock you that next time you will think twice before deceiving someone to get what you want.
ReplyDeleteSomeone that is a deceiver and a conniving liar, which God is he even serving? Or does he belong to those category of Christians who pick the part of the Bible they prefer and ignore the ones they don't like? His religion didn't tell him the devil is the father of deceivers? Him wanting your kids to act according to his religious beliefs is not even about Christ because he lacks godliness. Cunning and crafty man and selfish.
His deceit ruined everything he thinks he is standing for, I will just divorce him but he would be frustrated first. I even dislike people who don't compromise when it is not that I am here to live your life and I have my own life. He should have married someone like himself if he was serious.
This is why most men think they must control their wives when they don't have the decency, maturity amd intelligence to live and relate with a fellow grown adult like themselves in thw same house. An adult who has been make decisions for herself, thinking and living life before you showed up. They don't understand respect, autonomy and a woman having the right to make decisions for herself. They are too weak to navigate relationships and and adjusts and to selfish to compromise that what they keep demanding for respect (which is actually control in disguise) that they can't show their wives. Respect is not given it is earned so when I see some men screaming about it every eke market days, you just expose yourself that is something else you are looking for not respect
That was why when I met someone who wanted to force 4 kids on me when I didn't want up to that, I simply told him go and look for someone who wants the number of kids he wanted. Not that you will be trying to force a grown woman to do what you want. If its that easy why don't you too do what your wife wants?
I just realized that this one will want everything to be going his way do I blocked him. I have desires, likes, interests plans too and I am not here to live another person's life according to their taste when they aren't ready to make room to accommodate and compromise
If you are a man wanting marriage You look for someone who likes what you like and marry simple. Compatibility that's the keyword.
Not you forcing your desires on the person.
Imaging someone singing praises and worship, engaging in christian celebrations since a child with friends and family, worshipping God how they enjoy, you then show up like what I don't know and say never! who are you trying to rip of their autonomy.etc
That was how a man told a woman he doesn't want kids she agreed and started disturbing after the married her. The man just divorced her straight and married someone else. This is how people who think they can deceive others deserves to be treated.
Your husband lacks integrity.
Religion is not something to treat as an afterthought when choosing a life partner. Love alone does not erase deeply rooted beliefs, especially when those beliefs influence major life-and-death decisions.
ReplyDeleteJehovah's Witnesses are known for standing firmly by their doctrines. Their faith is central to how they live, raise their children, and make medical decisions. I'm honestly surprised your husband married outside his faith unless there was an understanding with his family or congregation that you would eventually become part of it.
My concern isn't about today; it's about tomorrow. If, God forbid, you or one of your children ever needs a blood transfusion to survive, would he choose his doctrine over your life? These are not hypothetical conversations; they are realities that many families have had to face.
Marriage is more than emotions. It is a lifelong partnership that requires agreement on values, faith, family, and critical decisions. Ignoring those differences at the beginning can lead to heartbreaking consequences later.
It's not surprising that Russia went as far as banning Jehovah's Witnesses and classifying their organization as extremist.
Never believe a religious person of differing faith anything, once children enter they usually do want their own faith to be the dominant one in the household. Even some who appeared non religious at first changed once child entered. Just marry from your own flock to be sure. This is the confusion and distress listening to feelings cause. Do not marry off feelings alone, put logic and reason at the forefront. Learn about the tolerant groups whose doctrine are similar before getting with anyone.
ReplyDeleteJW believers are more compatible with Mennonites or Amish type believers and still there are still big differences between those groups. Pentecostals, Church of God and Apostolic groups are more compatible. Catholics, Anglicans, Presbyterians are more compatible. Coptics and Ethiopian Orthodox are similar. Most nondenominational groups can work well together.
Maybe spiritual based counselling from a neutral party not belonging to either of your faiths could help, otherwise someone will have to back down for peace to reign. It’s messy.
those people will never keep to their promise, they are better with their members. Your husband will never accept that 50/50, he only said that so that you can agree to marry him. Any marriage that started on lies will never last.
ReplyDeleteTheir doctrine doesn’t even allow 90/10;so even 99/1;you won’t get if he is a 100% dedicated JW member.
ReplyDeleteIf he agrees to even 99.5% of his faith and gives you 0.5;%just know he isn’t a real member of JW..
So if you know you truly can’t agree to 100/0;no need for thinking he is ever going to bend;because not even “true love” will make a true member of JW celebrate birthday and all those things you need in their home..
I grew up with a lot of them;till today all of them married themselves;and the three JW members whom I know that married outside their members are divorced..
Do with the above info what you wish;If you decide to stay or leave;it’s all on you..
Their church doctrines pass “make I bend for the Love of my life” matter..
Your emotions doesn’t come before the doctrines of a real JW member..
Wish you all the best.
@MARTINS
For God's sake, how did you end up with a JW? that thing na cult na, they hardly marry outside their religion, I guess that guy's way of adding to the kingdom was to marry you. Oga Ade, its either you opt in or opt out, you can never win that battle. Na God save me, one of their member was on my matter for 3 years, as I dey refuse am na so he dey close mark me, he wasn't ready to back down until police enter the matter...they're very, very pedantic!
ReplyDeleteStella you are asking if they had sex hence his reason for marrying her but I thought these people do not fornicate before marriage ... Because it will be hypocritical to follow all these beliefs to a 'T' only to fornicate.
ReplyDeletePoster, sorry about your situation.
ReplyDeleteYour husband was looking for a new convert. Didn't you do the wedding at their kingdom hall? Because many of them will insist. They mostly marry their fellow JW, am surprised he married you a non JW 😧
Lol@ looking for a new convert. In all seriousness this may be what this was about all along.
DeleteMarriage doesn't change anyone. It only reveals the character of the one you married. Your husband has always been a J wit. You are the one who believes otherwise thinking maybe you would change him. And I am tempted to believe what the red pen says. Maybe he ate the forbidden fruit before marriage reason you were able to believe him. Marriage doesn't and has never changed anyone. Most of us just don't learn from history. Reason we are caught in the web.
ReplyDeleteWhen you have religion and not necessarily have God.
ReplyDeleteIf your are not godly just allow your husband to lead them without those birthdays and festival celebration but when it gets to blood transfusions, go and study reasons why it's very good to do blood donation to one another. Look for points that will beat his own hands down. When it comes to faith you should bear in mind that there are things that you don't need to compromise on when you are very convinced about your faith.
ReplyDeleteTake me for example, I know that my faith in Jesus doesn't permit me do animal sacrifice do appease the creator of the universe, if I eventually marry a man that is not deep on faith affairs, he comes in one day to tell me that the church he attends asked him to do some animal sacrifice to protect the life of my kids, God knows that I will never agree to such.
I'm actually surprised you got involved with a Jehovah's Witness, especially since many of the ones I know prefer to marry within their faith. Their beliefs and practices are quite different from those of most Christians.
ReplyDeleteFrom what I know, Jehovah's Witnesses are generally very firm in their beliefs and don't easily compromise. That leaves you with a difficult choice: either stay and accept that your children may be raised in that faith, or decide to leave the marriage. Even if you separate, disagreements over the children's religious upbringing could still be a major issue.
I pray God gives you wisdom and directs your steps.
What was the agreement before marriage?
ReplyDeleteHello Poster,
ReplyDeleteWhat I would have liked to understand, but which wasn't clear from your post, is whether this is simply a disagreement over religion or part of a wider pattern of broken trust and controlling behaviour that has now reached far beyond it. That would have helped put things in better perspective.
No sensible person enters a marriage blindly, especially today. Beyond love, you need to have had a better understanding of the character of the person you're choosing. If someone consistently lacks openness to other views, that can easily become a subtle form of control, whether it's expressed through religion, culture, or social beliefs.
Those are not issues to leave until after the wedding. Culture and religion, in particular, shape how people make decisions, raise children, and build a home. Love alone rarely changes convictions that have been formed over a lifetime.
Your husband has every right to practise his faith, but that right does not extend to silencing yours. Equally, you cannot expect him to raise your children in ways that go against his own beliefs. Marriage requires compromise from both sides. Preventing you from praying or praising and worshipping with your children is an attempt to control. Whereas marriage needs all the compromise it can get.
Come to think of it, does your marriage as it stands still have room for two equal adults? You know what you are into better than any of us. So, the choice is yours to make eventually for your mental well-being and peace of mind. A healthy marriage allows both partners to be seen, heard, and respected. When one person's beliefs consistently erase the other's, the relationship is no longer built on togetherness.
Please ..please please.. I rescued someone and am glad I did..please love doesn't cost a thing..life is just what it is.. Impact matters.. Pls create.. #Superman✌️
ReplyDeleteThere are some things that are difficult to navigate in a relationship : religion, tribe, language. These things are at the heart of our being and make-up no matter how "woke" we try to portray ourselves. The lady during courtship should have had a sense of the kind of person she was marrying and was naive in her understanding of her husbands faith. A lot of people start out saying that religion is not a big deal but i have found out that as people get older, their faith becomes very important. I can imagine the mans congregation asking him "who is the man " in the relationship and all the other membership roadblocks that would have been put in his path thus this hardline stance. . Her agreeing to marry a JW also calls into question the depth of her own faith/beliefs. She is obviously what we call a nominal Christian. It is well. It is left for her to decide what she wants. If she is not ready to leave the marriage, then she should abide by his rules. People like saying shebi we are worshipping God.... yes we are.... but HOW do we practice our own worship is the question.
ReplyDeleteStella you crazy, lol. Saying she gave him kepkus. Yall women kill me thinking your stinky holes are better than others. It's the same for us men. We marry for love not for kpepus. For companionship. For respect in society and for public image. Yall can do monkeys style, we men will still leave you or stay but keep cheating knowing you can't survive on your own with kids and to keep up the image of a responsible husband and father. Women think their kepkus gives them power. We men can literally fuck goats. You are just a hole we publicly dignify to build a good image for ourselves. Do you know how many of my friends wives are smelly, dirty, wide. I kniw because we men tell each other these things yet you see them out acting like they have the perfect image. The woman knows the man is cheating but as long as the affair is secret they are ok with it. Poster you are a fool for marrying a JW. Do you come from a rich background, did you force the marriage to happen claiming you might consider becoming one of his own JW one day? You are not telling the whole story.
ReplyDelete