Hmmmmmmmmmmm.....
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
DIFFICULT DECISIONMy closest friends ex boyfriend is asking me out and I am so confused and scared because i like him and feel he is genuine with his intentions towards me..I also know that i will lose the friendship with my friend if she finds out.....
Anytime i try to talk about my ex, she rounds up on her EX and tears him down with so many horrible things and what he supposedly did to her that caused their breakup.......She always calls him her ugly ex and he is indeed ugly but he has this sleek style, with self confidence, is from a very well to do back ground so he dresses very very well and all this adds up to make him very unique....
He says he broke up with her cos she sxx shamed him in front of very important people, she did it as a joke but nobody laughed and after that he
He says they were not serious and he wasnt sad to lose her...
We met through him but just before they broke up ...We kept running into each other that i had to ask him if he was stalking me, we laughed and that was it....
He doesnt want to date, he wants us to get married but i am so scared of what everyone will say...He says i should explain to my friend that i fell in love and want a commitment but i have told him i cant do it...
I have met his mum, my friend never met his mum......When i met his mum, she hugged me and had this funny smile on her face and when i asked him he said she is very mischevious and looking forward to how we will tidy this up....
The reason for this Chronicle is that he is proposing to meet my friend and I and talk to her or that i tell her..He says that he is tried of the hide and seek and wants to openly plan our wedding with family and friends......
Should i agree to the meeting he proposed or look for a way to tell her? I am scared to meet her alone in case she attacks me or something..How will i even start to talk?
Hmmmmmmm I am on break from giving advice abeg, I will resume next week.
Hmmmmmmm I am on break from giving advice abeg, I will resume next week.
Please note that i had to practically rewrite your chronicle cos there were too many details inside it...this is how a chronicle is supposed to be..Thank you!
If you really really love the guy and want to proceed, I suggest you talk to your friend yourself. Since you are afraid of her reaction, you can tell her in a public space where both of you won't be alone.
ReplyDeleteIt's better she hears it directly from you. Break the news to her in a calm manner.
My dear l understand how you feel.Do you love him and you are ready to settle down with him?lf so go ahead.Tell her everything and how both of you feel about each other.ls possible she is the channel God used to bring both of you together.She may quarrel with you ,With time she will get over it.But don't expect the friendship to be the same.And AVOId HER.
ReplyDeleteHe wan enter your friend through you again, but E go lick you finish first. Why did you hide that you guys have been gbenshing?
ReplyDeleteWhat happened to the Sis Code? Well it is what it is. If you really want this, then go for it. With respect to the sex-shaming, did he tell you the exact things she said. Let it not be that his sex game is not up to par and you end up getting with him and this becomes a source of frustration. As for telling your friend, i would advise you go with him and not alone .... just in case.
ReplyDeleteOmo...
ReplyDeleteWetin make SDK go on break sef, na samething dey make me too go on vacation bayii cuz this is seriously serious.
Have not been in such before, so, I cannot practically tell you what to do
Omo...
ReplyDeleteWetin make SDK go on break sef, na samething dey make me too go on vacation bayii cuz this is seriously serious.
Have not been in such before, so, I cannot practically tell you what to do
From the read of things, it's obvious you love this not-so-fine man and were waiting for the day of break up so you can chook head. Would you have fallen in love with him if he didn't have sleek style and didn't come from a well to do background? His mother's mischievous smile says it all. Man planned his payback with his mama to finish you patapata and then brag to your friend with evidence that, even with his not so fine face, he don deal with two of una 😛😛😛
ReplyDeleteAll the men you know in your life, na your friend ex dey enter your eye. Sha go and collect your own grand heartbreak
The men around my friends don't have my contact, because wetin we want dey discuss?
What if this sudden love for you is just because he wants to hurt your friend as a payback?
ReplyDeleteAs in.... your friend said he did horrible things to her and you believe him rather than your closest friend because of what... his good background....? You sound naive... The fact that he even wants to be there to tell your friend that the two of you are together.... Does that sound normal to you....? Sounds like he wants to use you to do revenge....
DeleteDear Poster;
DeleteI don't understand how you come about falling in love with your close friend's ex. But, we are different.
Please be very sure that this man really wants to spend the rest of his life with you and his intentions are genuine.
You don't want to be a tool
for him to score a point or get at your friend.
It is interesting that he wants marriage, and so on.
Please be careful.
Hmmmm,
ReplyDeleteWhy dont you study this person well before saying ... I do
Marriage these days takes a whole lot
Are you truly ready ??
I didn't finish reading but I see nothing wrong in dating a friends ex if you are not the cause of their breakup. I just can't relate to why people condemn it. She is and was never saying anything good about him which means she has no interest in him so what is wrong if you date him since she doesn't like him? I don't understand. I will only refuse if I know that there's every tendency that both of them will gbensh when I marry him
ReplyDeleteSee them, Birds of same feather.
DeleteYou have no problem sleeping with your friend's ex lover,
I pour your pregnant woman spit🤤!
As in eh, where is the sister code?
Una dey mad?
What about the okofor's law?
Una no dey fear?
What about Karma?
Una sick?
Men don finish for this life ni!
Omo eh,
The kind things people try to justify for their selfish eh!
GOD please protect my loved ones and I from every form of betrayal 🙏
A guy that you agree is ugly and your friend also sex shamed him, so he’s ugly and his sex game is bad but you want to shook head because of money? Tor goodluck
Delete17:00 I don talk my own o. Anything you like talk, na you sabi. I immediately pour you sheet water.
DeleteSister code how? Sister code on someone that the friend says she never loved? You are insane. I don't think you thought this wisely before casting your judgement.
Delete@anon 17.00. WTF is sister code. Una go just to perpetuate nonsense. My friend getat. Men used to marry sisters, what the fuck is sister code. Your brain is meant to enable you think independently not doing idiotic things that dont make sense. How does it hurt anyone if he is truly her ex. Abeg shift. Selfish people. If he is not good enough for you and its good enough for your friend, he happy for your friend and move on.
DeleteUmu ekwensu
ReplyDeleteMy dear eh!
DeleteEven the devil go reject some set of people for hell.
If you both truly love each other, please go ahead, in life we got to meet our life partners through close friends and relatives,maybe that's the way of connecting with yours.
ReplyDeleteMy dear,
ReplyDeleteYou were never your friend's friend,
You are an enemy.
You have always been jealous of that your friend.
Like what the hell?
Out of the millions men out there, Na your friend ex dey hungry you?
I reject your type of friend around me and my loved ones in JESUS' MIGHTY NAME AMEN 🙏.
Go ahead and enjoy your betrayal.
Where you de see the millions of men? Biko sharp there. You just talking nonsense. Abi no be ex the man bi again?
DeleteHmmmmmmm 🙄
ReplyDeleteI No Dey Put Mouth For This Marra oooo
Hello iya Boys
Stella , you must to advise ooo. Wetin make you dey run , lol
ReplyDeleteIf you are sure he is for real, you too is sure you want to have something forever with him. Is best you see your friend one on one, make sure you go to an open place where people can see you both, assist you incase she want to play any funny game. You can also invite a friend over who will stay a distance while watching you both to be sure she doe not do anything funny.
ReplyDeleteSince they are not together anymore speak with her and whatever she says about his ugly character since you are good with him, just say okay and than you for your concern. You are an adult which can take decision on your own. All the very best.
I think honesty is the best path, even if it's uncomfortable. If your friend's relationship with him is truly over, neither of them owns the other's future.
ReplyDeleteHowever, because she is your closest friend, she deserves to hear it from you before she hears it elsewhere. If you are genuinely afraid she'll become violent, then a meeting with all three of you or in a public place is the safer option.
Just be prepared that she may not accept it, and you might lose the friendship. If you and this man are certain about marriage, you'll have to decide whether you're willing to pay that price.
Hmmm. If you value your friendship, then please find someone else. But if you don't value your friendship, then you can proceed
ReplyDeleteMarry him
ReplyDeleteShe’ll marry someone else
It’s not like leaving him will give her the guy
This guy go lick two plates for free. The guy is a real man. Ugly guy wey get money na fine bobo.... . Happy viewing
ReplyDeleteWhen he started toasting you, you didnt tell your closest friend... to the extent you met his mother boasting that she never met his mum.... she was never your closest friend if you can do all you've said here and say nothing to your alleged closest friend.... just accept that you've been interested in him since and you dont value the friendship....
ReplyDeleteMarry him if you choose but if things do not work out or he has an agenda please dont go back to your alleged close friend and be feigning friendship... you're as fake as they come
She love his well to do family nothing else ,shameless somebody.
ReplyDeleteI don't think it's alright. Personally I can never date any one that has dated any person I know, Let alone a friend .
ReplyDeleteHea not the only man on the planet Earth baby girl
RUN 🏃♂️ 🏃♂️ 🏃♂️. This is going to be messy if you stay
ReplyDeleteYou that already would do what is in your mind asking for advice? In a short while you don meet mama and family members including mentors join. Nor be the money he get dey enter your eye? Osino he's ugly but has swag. De play.
ReplyDeleteI doubt if he wants to really marry you. Most men use marriage to get into ladies pants these days. He is telling you that he does not want to date, he wants marriage straight, how?
ReplyDeletePls date him first and know if he truly has those horrible characters your friend talked about. You can tell him no sex for now, cos he may actually be after your kpekus..
Let me also tell you that meeting his mum, dad, Grandpa, great grandma and his village elders will not make him marry you if he doesn't want to.
ReplyDeleteNobody can force a man to marry you, even if you get pregnant for him.
You're putting the cart before the horse. Don't plan a wedding before you've even navigated this conversation. My advice to you is to tell your friend yourself—don't let him lead the conversation. A joint meeting with her ex is more likely to feel like she's being ambushed, which could make things much worse. If you're genuinely afraid she might become physically aggressive, meet her in a public place or have a phone/video call instead.
ReplyDeleteMost importantly, slow down. He's already talking about marriage, introducing you to his family, and wanting to announce wedding plans. Make sure you're choosing a husband based on time, trust, and compatibility, not just intense emotions. If the relationship is real, it will survive moving at a sensible pace.
Is the sex game really bad as in.bad?
ReplyDeleteThen...