CONFLICTED
Dear Stella, I am conflicted on what to do because what I saw some weeks back has put me in a very uncomfortable position.
My sister and her husband travelled out of town for a friend’s birthday party. She left early because she was helping with the planning but husband joined her later cos of work. I also attended the same party with my own friends.
Stella, while the party was on, I stepped outside to take a call. My sister was nowhere in sight and I saw my sister’s husband standing beside a parked car with my sister’s closest friend ,the one who practically lives in our house cos her husband is abroad. They weren’t just talking, he was holding her hand, and she was leaning into him in a way that didn’t look innocent at all. When they noticed someone approaching from the other side, they quickly separated.
Some minutes later, both of them walked back into the venue from different directions.. I was watching and since then i have been visiting my sister at every given chance to monitor things.
Stella she is my sisters closest friend and what i saw was not ordinary at all.
This friend knows everything about my sister’s marriage. She knows her struggles and how much my sister trusts her and seeing them together like that shook me.
Now I don’t know what to do cos If I tell my sister, I may destroy her home and become the enemy who broke her marriage but should i keep quiet, and betray her?
Should i confront the friend or my brother in law?One thing i know for sure is that i cannot keep quiet.
Mumu!!!
Confront without evidence and become the fall guy!
Get evidence and have a talk with your brother in law, take him far and dont tell him you have evidence make e no go kpai you oh, just tell him you saw them and that its not fair on your sister….he may not stop but they will be careful..if they try to set you up as a liar, please bring out your evidence...And also when you go to have this talk with him? codedly record it...
If you cannot do these, then please mind your business oh cos you will not just be breaking a friendship, you will be breaking up a marriage and sisterhood with your sister...Or you think telling her would prove loyalty? You dey learn work be that!
Dear Stella, I am conflicted on what to do because what I saw some weeks back has put me in a very uncomfortable position.
My sister and her husband travelled out of town for a friend’s birthday party. She left early because she was helping with the planning but husband joined her later cos of work. I also attended the same party with my own friends.
Stella, while the party was on, I stepped outside to take a call. My sister was nowhere in sight and I saw my sister’s husband standing beside a parked car with my sister’s closest friend ,the one who practically lives in our house cos her husband is abroad. They weren’t just talking, he was holding her hand, and she was leaning into him in a way that didn’t look innocent at all. When they noticed someone approaching from the other side, they quickly separated.
Some minutes later, both of them walked back into the venue from different directions.. I was watching and since then i have been visiting my sister at every given chance to monitor things.
Stella she is my sisters closest friend and what i saw was not ordinary at all.
This friend knows everything about my sister’s marriage. She knows her struggles and how much my sister trusts her and seeing them together like that shook me.
Now I don’t know what to do cos If I tell my sister, I may destroy her home and become the enemy who broke her marriage but should i keep quiet, and betray her?
Should i confront the friend or my brother in law?One thing i know for sure is that i cannot keep quiet.
Mumu!!!
Confront without evidence and become the fall guy!
Get evidence and have a talk with your brother in law, take him far and dont tell him you have evidence make e no go kpai you oh, just tell him you saw them and that its not fair on your sister….he may not stop but they will be careful..if they try to set you up as a liar, please bring out your evidence...And also when you go to have this talk with him? codedly record it...
If you cannot do these, then please mind your business oh cos you will not just be breaking a friendship, you will be breaking up a marriage and sisterhood with your sister...Or you think telling her would prove loyalty? You dey learn work be that!
What's special about breaking a marriage that's already broken? 😂
ReplyDeleteI can never understand why people always say don't break the marriage, which marriage?
E no tire you. Lol
DeleteThe MUMU was used lightly and the poster and i have communicated on that so please face the advice and leave it.........mumu was not referring to her but to the act of wanting to confront.......
DeleteI will delete your comment if you leave the advice and face me
thank you
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
DeleteU go explain tire mumu
DeleteMaybe contact the abroad husband anonymously and tell him that his wife and herbest friend's husband are having an affair?
ReplyDeleteTwo things are involved, they will open up to your sis if they are innocent or handle the allegation quietly if guilty.
This is the best advice send the evidence anonymously to the husband abroad
DeleteDon't keep quiet, it's better to break everything breakable before your sister is broken to heaven, she can be killed by her closest friend, God will deliver everybody from unfriendly friends and unfaithful spouse
ReplyDeletePoster, you just have to let your sister know with evidence because they will surely deny. Your sister’s life is at stake here, don’t let them kpai her for you.
ReplyDeleteThe marriage broke the day her hubby decided to start sleeping with his wife’s best friend so what is there to protect?
Whatever the outcome is,even if your sister turns you to her enemy, is none of your business.
It’s so sad that this is the reality of a lot of women with dogbands.
Why call the poster a mumu?
ReplyDeletePoster, confront them. If the marriage breaks up, it is not you. The horseband that stepped out, and the silly friend caused it.
You should have said something to them immediately. I will tell you to warn your sister to be careful and tell her what you saw. Tell her to do her own findings aswell.
ReplyDeleteSo many things worked together to bring about this issue. Your sister's friend's loneliness. Her sexual needs
ReplyDeleteSend your sister anonymous message abeg. What rubbish???. You want her friend to kpai her?.
ReplyDeleteYour brother in law is also at fault for not disciplining himself
ReplyDeleteWhen there is a loophole somewhere, people can exploit it.
ReplyDeleteDon't be surprised that it was not your brother in law that was chasing his wife's friend, but the other way round.
ReplyDeleteHaving seen him as appealing as she likes, she determined to use him to solve her problems of loneliness and sexual urge
ReplyDeleteWhat kind of sisters do you all have that you need evidence before speaking to them?
ReplyDeleteThe thing tire me o. That your own sister will think you’ll lie with something of that sort. Your sis is your blood before any brother in law.
DeleteI feel strongly that she was the person who initiated the relationship with her friend's husband.
ReplyDeleteWhat to do.
ReplyDeleteCall your sister's friend and talk with her, baring everything.
It is better for their friendship that she confesses to your sister than that you divulge what you saw to her
ReplyDeleteIt will interest you to know that if you approach it in a non confrontational manner, she might open up to you about her feeling of loneliness and the build up of sexual urge in her.
ReplyDeleteMy aim is to mend what could be mended.
ReplyDeleteTalking heart to heart with your sister's friend will be an avenue to seek healing for her, your sister and the husband.
Tell her plainly that she is very wrong to have chosen the path of having affair with her friend's husband.
ReplyDeleteBut still, let her know that she is not the only sinner.
Let her see that she can't really use a problem to solve another.
If she agrees with you and accepts her wrong, she will definitely accept to confess to her friend concerning the affairs.
ReplyDeleteThe obodo oyibo man should come and carry his wife. It is as simple as that
ReplyDeleteIn the mean time, she can channel her sexual energy into spiritual energy.
ReplyDeleteLet her get desperate to receive from God everything she is asking God for, including enabling the hubby to scale every obstacles preventing him from coming to take his wife to live with him
Sexual urges have been placed there by God. Don't try to spiritualise what God himself created. Just saying
DeleteFollowing it the way many have suggested might lead to the scattering of your sister's marriage. Follow it with wisdom.
ReplyDeleteThe proposed confession by her friend is supposed to defuse the tension that could have risen should your sister finds out from another source the truth of the matter.
Going by this logic of defusing the tension, I will suggest that your sister's friend and your sister's husband do the confession together.
ReplyDeleteIn the event that both refused the confession, then you owe it to your sister to tell her the truth.
ReplyDeleteDo not follow this advice by confronting 2 adults who may not want to end their rship and ask them to go confess. They’ll gang up on you and name you as the seducer. Be careful.
DeleteId you like hide thongstfrom your sis you hear let them poison your sis
ReplyDeleteYou don’t need to confront either of them or jump to conclusions yet, but you also shouldn’t ignore what you witnessed. Tell your sister privately, sticking strictly to what you actually saw without adding assumptions. Let her decide how she wants to handle her marriage and friendship.
ReplyDeleteYou could say: “I saw something at the party that concerned me, and because I love you, I feel you deserve to know. I’m not saying I know what happened, but I saw your husband holding your friend's hand and she was leaning on him, and they quickly separated when someone approached. I didn’t want to hide this from you.” After that, step back and support your sister.
Big Stella funny dye. God help you my sister. Cos wisdom no plenty for this kind matter.
ReplyDeleteWell technically you didn’t see anything so what’s there to report
ReplyDeleteYou can tell your sister their closeness is too much and let her use her sense
But don’t accuse them of what you didn’t see