Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: How To Do Away With Your Mean Mother In - Law

Advertisement

Advertisement - Mobile In-Article

Tuesday, August 18, 2015

How To Do Away With Your Mean Mother In - Law

This is for all the Men and Women who are going through big time stress with their Mothers in law...
Please Make sure you give this a dedicated try..IT MUST WORK!

Take a sit whilst you read!



A long time ago in China , a girl named Li-Li got married and went to live with her husband and mother-in-law. In a very short time, Li-Li found that she couldn't get along with her mother-in-law at all.
Their personalities were very different, and Li-Li was angered by many of her mother-in-law's habits. In addition, she criticized Li-Li constantly.
Days passed, and weeks passed. Li-Li and her mother-in-law never stopped arguing and fighting.
But what made the situation even worse was that, according to ancient Chinese tradition, Li-Li had to bow to her mother-in-law and obey her every wish. All the anger and unhappiness in the house was causing Li-Li's poor husband the great distress.


Finally, Li-Li could not stand her mother-in-law's bad temper and dictatorship any longer, and she decided to do something about it! Li-Li went to see her father's good friend, Mr. Huang, who sold herbs.
She told him the situation and asked if he would give her some poison so that she could solve the problem once and for all.


Mr. Huang thought for awhile, and finally said, "Li-Li, I will help you solve your problem, but you must listen to me and obey what I tell you."


Li-Li said, "Yes, Mr. Huang, I will do whatever you tell me to do."Mr. Huang went into the back room, and returned in a few minutes with a package of herbs. He told Li-Li, "You can't use a quick-acting poison to get rid of your mother-in-law, because that would cause people to become suspicious. Therefore, I have given you a number of herbs that will slowly 
build up poison in her body. Every other day prepare some delicious meal and put a little of these herbs in her serving.


Now, in order to make sure that nobody suspects you, when she dies, you must be very careful to act very friendly towards her. "Don't argue with her, obey her every wish, and treat her like a queen." Li-Li was so happy.
She thanked Mr. Huang and hurried home to start her plot of murdering her mother-in-law.

Weeks went by, and months went by, and every other day, Li-Li served the specially treated food to her mother-in-law. She remembered what Mr. Huang had said about avoiding suspicion, so she controlled her temper, obeyed her mother-in-law, and treated her like her own mother.


After six months had passed, the whole household had changed. Li-Li had practiced controlling her temper so much that she found that she almost never got mad or upset. She hadn't had an argument with her mother-in-law in six months because she now seemed much kinder and easier to get along with.
The mother-in-law' s attitude toward Li-Li changed, and she began to love Li-Li like her own daughter. She kept telling friends and relatives that Li-Li was the best daughter-in- law one could ever find. Li-Li and her mother-in-law were now treating each other like a real mother and daughter.


Li-Li's husband was very happy to see what was happening. One day, Li-Li came to see Mr. Huang and asked for his help again She said, "Dear Mr. Huang, please help me to keep the poison from killing my mother-in-law. She's changed into such a nice woman, and I love her like my own mother. I do not want her to die because of the poison I gave her."


Mr. Huang smiled and nodded his head. "Li-Li, there's nothing to worry about. I never gave you any poison. The herbs I gave you were vitamins to improve her health. The only poison was in your mind and your attitude towards her, but that has been all washed away by the love which you gave to her."



HAVE YOU REALIZED that how you treat others is exactly how they will treat you? There is a wise Chinese saying: "The person who loves others will also be loved in return." God might be trying to work in another person's life through you. 



A friend of mine was complaining about how her mother in law was almost crashing her marriage with jealousy blah blah and that her hubby no longer comes home.After listening to her story.i asked if she loved her mother in law and showed it to her.she said their relationship started off on a zero level.
I told her to show the woman love and see what would happen.
She sent me a thank you message recently that all was okay now and she didnt know she had a clown for a mother in law.
This might not work for everyone but have you given it a try to see that it doesnt work for you? or you sit there and assume cos you think she is such a terrible person?

The problem might be YOU!



122 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. I love this write-up!

      Beautiful!

      Those who scream poison your MIL, forget they would become one in the nearest future. Mtcheww!

      Diplomacy and tactics is the best way forward when dealing with difficult people.

      Delete
    2. Em jay,ow do u manage to be first to comment

      Delete
    3. Love is surely the ultimate but what if the mother in law refuses to eat the food ?

      Delete
    4. Emjay, abeg what exactly is not a small something?

      Delete
    5. The Key is to treat her like your own mother! A lot of us expect toooooo much from these women. We dont always get along with our mother all the time. We often have issues with them, minor or major quarrels but we love them nevertheless and always make up so WHY EXPECT too much from someone you ve only known for a short time?
      If we treat our MILs as we would our biological mothers, the tales of woe btwn DILs and MIL will reduce

      Delete
    6. I hv d best MIL. She loves me even more than her son. Always calls nd buy me stuff. Call to b invited b4 coming nd we liv in d same town. Lov her

      Delete
    7. Not a new story. I'v read it some yrs back.

      Delete
    8. Abeg stella,some mother in laws are just wicked,jealous infact dem be witch. My friend has such as moda in law. My friend is too nice to a fault,her Dh met her a virgin sef but he moda in law just hated her for no reason from day 1. Some do these out of jealosy while some are scare their son's love towards them is about to be divided.

      Delete
    9. At Christabel Christian; your MIL loves you more than her son. I hear you and keep deceiving yourself. Am not saying she isn't a good person who loves you but she can never love you more than her son. Impossible my dear.

      Delete
    10. Thanks ever so much - those who love are loved back

      Delete
    11. I love my MIL. Treats me like her own daughter and does not joke with my daughter. A large part of my life is what it is today because of her . She does not come over without prior notice and does not stay more than 2 days. She believes so much in privacy.

      Delete
  2. My hubby's mum is late. Though i believe i would have enjoyed her because of the way my husband speaks of her. Continue to Rest in Peace ma.


    Need a yummy Birthday/Wedding cake in Abuja? Home / office delivery. Also send a gift of cake to your loved one in Abuja.Pls click on my ID to see pics and my contact details.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. All this long epistle on top mother inlaw!
      Hmmmmmmm,oriegwu oooh

      Delete
    2. Some daughter inlaw are also very wicked, if it was there mother, they won't complain this much.
      They should deal with !

      Delete
    3. Most of us come into marriage with this bad MIL mindset. Until we start approaching our thing our way it won't be easy

      Delete
  3. i'm so glad you added that it might not work for everyone, but it's definitely worth giving a try for peace. nice one

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Stella sometimes i..... lol most time I love you.. WORD!! A million likes G.O of SDK.. I have boys n I love them very much I wear ok but dress them up in designers clothing.. I buy the very best toys gifts etc.. They way love me, the kisses the cuddling the 'I love you I get.. the way they pamper me when I'm ill plant kisses pray for me..

      Dear future daughter in law.. Be patient when I get overly jealous :D

      Delete
  4. Yeah I've read this story before.
    Even though some MILs can be overbearing, sometimes our attitude may even be the problem. We already have a mindset about them and that's where problems set in.

    BV Clara Udeh, is Eno Edekhe your sister? I just looked you up on FB and saw she's a mutual friend. Plus she has your kind of eyes

    ReplyDelete
  5. God bless you Stella, the major problem is from the wives.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Na u knw, Oga anon. Sometimes its the MIL, some MIL are just so difficult.

      Delete
    2. Anon 13:08, Pack it in abeg! The major problem is not from the wives, some wives have an attitude usually in reaction to the maltreatment they get from their MILs. It usually starts from the MILs themselves and it stems from the way they were treated by their own husband and his family while their children where growing up and they bore it with the attitude "I'm just bearing all this because of the children" and "no stupid girl can just come from nowhere to compete with me for my son's attention/love after all I went through in my inlaw's/husband's hands" etc and that's how the poor children's future marital problems begin from before they're even grown. That's why you can never satisfy some MILs, they're not looking for you to satisfy them, they hate (not the wives in particular) but the idea that someone else "another female" is being showered love and affection when they were the ones who suffered in silence to raise the sons. Some MILs manage to break away from this mindset either consciously or subconsciously but others are too twisted and engulfed, that's when they turn out to be monsters to their DILs. That's why we see some who seem determined to destroy even their daughters' marriages too. Yet, they can't marry their children and their children also need to be allowed to be happy in their marriages. The MILs that recognize this fact are the ones who live happily with their children's spouses. They understand! Whenever there's a mean-spirited MIL, look at her hubby and in-laws; they're usually the root-cause of it. And men, when you give your wives hell and force her to only "face the children" and only live for them because you've given her nothing else to live for, just remember how you're also orchestrating things for your wives to ruin or damage those kids' marital happiness in the future! That's why I hate when people shout at wives going through marital trauma to "face the children" as if they're robots. These women REALLY do face their children and find it hard to let go when the time comes. I mean, all these MIL chronicles are evidence enough, these women aren't that bad but they turn that way due to what they went through too. We need to end that cycle now! Give our children a fair chance of happy marriages, it is tough enough as it is without MIL/FIL troubles. Husbands please treat your wives well, protect them from your family members so that they won't expect your children not to protect their own chosen wives too. It's a cycle and we can set the ball rolling now. A wife who is well loved, cherished and protected by her husband even in the midst of his people will most likely expect her son to do the same for his wive even around/in her presence and same would be the case if all she got from your family was woes and you never protected her. She would transfer such aggression to your sons' wives and expect them not to protect their wives too. What Stella suggested is true and good but as she stated, it won't work for every situation. So to avoid or drastically reduce nasty MIL situations that ruin their children/grand children's happiness, It is time to start protecting their happy futures from now! Almost everything we do now as family units is tied to that! Enough of blaming the wives when the husbands are the ones failing to set the pace by protecting them. When you fail to protect your wife, you're also failing to protect your children!!!.......... Just Me

      Delete
    3. So after reading that long epistle, you expect me to read this aswell? Mbanu

      Delete
    4. SO LONG A COMMENT. HIAN

      Delete
    5. It is long but very very right. Making a lot of valid points there

      Delete
  6. Replies
    1. My mil and I are like rattle snake and cat. She is the rattle snake. Her wahala no be here. As she strike, I always jump and pass. That's how we do it. Alert is the watch word.

      Delete
  7. I love this article, can't believe I got so emotional while reading this. The best bet is to marry a man, not a mama's boy. That way, he would always a cordial relationship between his wife and his mother.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Good one but easier said than done in naija... This is not China. Any mother inlaw who hates d daughter inlaw, her own don finish no matter how much love u show her. Again, d problem might be from d hatee and not d hater. Stella DIL and MIL matter no be easy one o! Whichever way u look @ it, in naija if u go de show too much love when na hate u de get, na im be say u don shit for altar use bible clean yansh cos d treatment u will get due to suspicion from d other person no be here.. God bestow our homes with enough peace to go round.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. olori ISIS,stop deceiving your self.

      Delete
    2. Exactly but in all let's be prayerful. Nice piece

      Delete
    3. ISIS is right.

      Delete
  9. . . . And again know their limits.
    My MIL seemed troublesome initially but I understand her better now. I've learnt to live peacefully with her and we don't have problems. When she wants to talk, I allow her. Unlike before I'll be arguing and trying to defend myself. When she finishes I'll bring up my points and she'll agree with me. So just understand her. Cos in the end the man is the one in a fix and he's torn between his wife and mother when there's no peace.

    ReplyDelete
  10. This one only happened in china not nija,what's wrong if the inlaw tries to be nice instead of the wife having to stress all through?no matter the love u give some it won't change anything,some deserves the fire fire kind of DIL.sha for me,the whole thing starts from d dating period,how u present urslf n carry urslf determines everythng.show them the love,but they should know their boundries.and if ur hubby stands by u,u have nothing to worry abt cos he/she ll always defend n fight for u.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Please, I don't think hatred on MIL shd be encouraged.

    E don too much abeg!

    ReplyDelete
  12. When I saw the Headline, I be wan sue you stella before. Great piece

    ReplyDelete
  13. My mother in law is very understanding and very very nice. God bless and keep her.

    ReplyDelete
  14. True!! But sometimes some MIL need Jesus!

    ReplyDelete
  15. True but not always. Some MIL aren't smiling at all. Irrespective of what you do, you can't win their heart especially all those ones that told their sons not to marry you. Hohohoho

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. God bless you my sister. Some Mil are truelly moster inlawz.
      They hate not to be d one that their son tells everything he wants to do. And most of them feel its their right for their son/dil to live their lives pleasing her and doing all her biding,forgeting the fact that the bible states that "A man shall leave his mother and father,and shall CLING to his WIFE,and both shall become ONE" but that clinging is what most of them don't want to see.

      They are happier if their son comes to complain that their dil is this and that.most of them don't love it when there is peace in their son's home.Instead,they love to hear that there is chaos and disharmony,so that their son can always come running back to them.

      I shm for all them Monster inlawz who has refused to let the word of God go into them."As them take treat other ppl daughters,na so their own go see weah for their husband house".

      But the other percentage of the GOOD MOTHER IN-LAW,may Jehovah continue to make you reap the good of your labour; you shall die with your daughter in-laws and children's children singing your praises. Its is good to be good.

      Delete
    2. Amen n Amen.We shall all reap whatever we sow

      Delete
  16. Hnmm such an inspiring piece. I pray those experiencing any form of storms in their homes will begin to enjoy God's peace and love. It is well.

    ReplyDelete
  17. SOME MOTHER-IN -LAWS BEEN CAUSING PROBLEM SINCE 1009 BC!

    ReplyDelete
  18. I knew the man wouldn't give her poison; he was just looking for a way to get her to love and respect her mil.

    Probably wouldn't work for everyone one though.

    Click my name for all your celebration cakes and cupcakes, cheers

    ReplyDelete
  19. When ladies start embracing the ideas of having mother in laws around, then the world will be a better place. if you cannot treat your mother in law well that means you cannot treat your mother well.

    my own take, never agree to stay in the same compound or building with your mother inlaw built by the father inlaw as when the husband dont have moneyy.

    this is for ndi ofe mmanu that always live with their parents.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Smh for u..it always has to come to this right? Shame on u

      Delete
  20. Wow, what a nice story. The old man simply apply wisdom.

    ReplyDelete
  21. You know sometimes we come into marriage with a mindset. MILs are controlling,wicked,rude and domineering but this is not true. We forget they were once babes like us. Most of them are afraid of losing their child's affection.
    A woman in church who has just one son told a story. She said her son got married n when he invited her over,he was scared that the wife wud see her as an intruder so she was forming hard woman. She said when she got there,the DIL was so kind to her that she was confused n alert o. Then one night,the girl came to her room and told her she wanted her to feel relaxed,that she will never let his son turn his back on her bcos when her own son marries,she will not like to be dumped. She also told her,according to her,that as she had no mum,she would love her,her MIL ,to teach her things her own mum couldnt teach her as she died when she was 17. The MIL said she n her DIL are best of pals now but she does not visit unless invited.

    Again,the above story she told shows dat MIL AND DIL do have mindsets.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Because both are women. What has happens to all the fils that problems never are from them. You see once the women admit the are a baggage like each other they will lraen to coexist. Have you asked why men can live together in spite of their different shenanigans and part in peace while ladies that ate best friends would part ways violently before their living together even begins and would still go ahead to spread damaging stories about their once best friends

      Delete
    2. Youngman, you got it completely wrong there. FILs are usually the problem in most of these cases. They set the ball rolling for years and years while their kids are still growing up before things start to manifest in form of unbearable MILs in latter years. Look into the stories of any mean/overbearing MIL and you'll find out what she went through in the hands of her husband and inlaws. We simply need to identify the catalyst in these series of reactions to understand better and solve the problems instead of blindly blaming the women which is the typical African man's response to most things. The MIL is probably just being territoral because of what she's been through and is also "paying it forward" while the DIL has propably heard of such treatment, knows or fears that her hubby will not defend her and so feels compelled to stand up for herself; hence the back and forth between the two women. While the FIL and hubby sit down there acting like like mutes, FIL claiming "we men don't cause trouble, it is always the women" and hubby saying "I don't know why my wife and mother just can't get along, this is so frustrating" etc. Well, wake up and do something before your mother turns your wife into someone who will make your children's lives too miserable in future! Let your mother know you love her so much and will never leave her or take her for granted but let her also know you invited your wife into your family and married her because you love her and you're now one. If your mother wants what is best for you and your own family, she'll love your wife just the same too. And if nothing works, start shielding your wife from her. There should be no reason for you mother and wife to be at loggerheads, exchange words or attitudes. You're the man and it is your duty to prevent all of that. Use wisdom and don't just sit there like a log abeg!

      Delete
  22. I don't have mother in law yet but when I do I will invent my own ways. But I must respect her first and treat her like my mom. But if she decides to tell me dat she is not my mom then I will definitely teach her some lessons.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol



      No be by running mouth o.

      MILs are tough.


      #WhiteDiamondOut

      Delete
    2. Just like your future DIL will treat you x4..

      Delete
    3. Easier said than done. Me wey no dey gree at all but I saw the one wey senior me in my mil. To top it all she always pretend to be so good to me when my DH is around and I do same too. But once my DH turn his back na game of the throne we dey. Just pray u don't inherit a bad mil.

      Delete
    4. Hahaha @ game of the thrones.

      Whirlwind

      Delete
  23. Yea...nice write up, though some mother inlaw can be though sometimes. You just have to treat her the way you'll like your own mum to be treated.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Nice wrte up. Oya all ye with mean mother in-law, start giving her some good loving.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Sone mother inlaws can be somethingelse..but its best to apply wisdom and ubderstanding in dealing with them

    www.glowyshoes.com

    ReplyDelete
  26. As a man,u shld be able to protect ur wife from ur mother/family members..u shld know dia expectations,things dey complain about n guide her accordingly...when my ex used to come over to visit at our family house,I'd wake up early n sweep n do all d dishes, somtin I probably wldnt rush to do or leave for someone else ordinarily so dat noone cld run mouth dat she's lazy...if u know ur mum has wahala,avoid unecessary closeness. Anytime my mum complains about anybody's wife ,I remind her how a female family member complains about her in-laws n dey call Dem wicked in-laws dat she'l be called a wicked MIL too...my mum has a good relationship with my sisters in law sha,maybe it's bcos of d distance..d only one close by na her friend,dey can gist n gossip for Africa n wen Dem dey fight nko?na anoda tin...she'l ask me which side I'm on cos I alwz support my SIL n tell my mum 'don't try dis wit my wife o'

    ReplyDelete
  27. So inspiring, I always hail my sis in law for coping with my mom she's such a hard nut but a very sweet mom when u treat her right

    ReplyDelete
  28. God bless you Stella! Exactly what my pastor preached on Sunday, when someone deliberately decides to be mean to you just on your decide to be kind to the person and see what the result would be! Paying evil back never resulted to anything good rather it destroys.....i pray that God would give us the foresight to know these things.

    ReplyDelete
  29. O di egwu.Stella,You've not met some women.I pray to have a good relationship with my MIL but some women are just impossible.No matter how nice you try to be towards them,they even get worse.Infact,some even mistake the niceness for stupidity and weakness.

    ReplyDelete
  30. This to me is the best advice and prescription I have read on this blog. Over time i discovered from interactions that single girls already have a plan of actions down as to how they will cage their mothers-in law even before seeing a man that would marry them and carry this predetermined mindset into their marriage. I always say that today's mil was yesterday's dil and today's dil is tomorrow's mil. The problem is that today's man is poorly trained from home. Every man is capable ofaking his home what he wants and the woman wiilfall in line and those who can't fit in take a route out by themselves. This is from experience. A bad mil to her dil is a good mil to her daughter's husband why? Or are there no bad fathers in law? So why is it always a case with mils and sils? Whenever a woman jams a real man she behaves but when the jam a Mellon they display all sorts of characters. But the key is that a realan is always JUST and FIRM. Not minding who the truth,justice and equity offends. She will always call you names for not just pandering to her wiles(a means of manipulation) but will always see u as a pillar of support each and every time she is in the right

    ReplyDelete
  31. Interesting and very inspirational story though it might' not work with some mind made up evil mother in laws. I saw it first on wives connection blog and had to share with friends and family members

    ReplyDelete
  32. O di egwu.Stella,You've not met some women.I pray to have a good relationship with my MIL but some women are just impossible.No matter how nice you try to be towards them,they even get worse.Infact,some even mistake the niceness for stupidity and weakness.

    ReplyDelete
  33. Mothers in law wahala everyday. Tank God for my mother in law, such a nice woman. She loved and accepted me frm day 1. That is why i can do no wrong in her eyes. On d other hand, she did nt accept my brother in law's wife frm d start and up till today, she is always picking fights wit her and bad mouthing her to every1. Ladies, if ur MIL to be does nt like u, dnt marry her son tinking u will change her wit love, she will neva love u back and 90percent of men wil take sides wit dere mum, thereby making ur marriage a living hell.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Nice write up
    Women should be patient with their MIL

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I and my MIL's love is best from a far simple. I no get strength for too much talk biko.

      Delete
  35. Stella, it will work for any woman that is not foolish and naturally stubborn.

    ReplyDelete
  36. I was in a salon sometime ago and a lady was telling her friend that she prays that her MIL-to-be dies before she gets married. To say that I was shocked was an understatement. She forgot that she'll be a mum to a man someday or she also have a mum she loves and won't want anyone to wish dead.
    My point is some ladies already have the mind set that their MIL will be a bad person and that may be the reason they are always defensive when with her. Same thing with some MIL. Love actually conquers all.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Nice write up. All i pray is to have a good mother in law.... Ike okwu adighim

    ReplyDelete

  38. The Key is to treat her like your own mother! A lot of us expect toooooo much from these women. We dont always get along with our mother all the time. We often have issues with them, minor or major quarrels but we love them nevertheless and always make up so WHY EXPECT too much from someone you ve only known for a short time?
    If we treat our MILs as we would our biological mothers, the tales of woe btwn DILs and MIL will reduce

    ReplyDelete
  39. My MIL is late but i wish she was alive, i dont think she would have been a problem to me. My own issue is with my SIL, she is a green snake under green grass. This babe is manipulative, wicked and a serious gossip. Someone i treated with so much love, i took her as my own sister, buying her clothes she could never think of getting before, ensuring my husband pays her fees on time and give her money and i also give her money once in a while. I was even planning that she will join me on a trip to Dubai as my close female friends are not in the country. I didnt know that she came into my home to try to paint me black in front of my husband and make my husband see me as a bad person. Now everyone is answering her surname, she is no longer welcomed in my home. Thank God for the man i married that loves me more than anything else and confides in me. Friends warned me about her before but i ignored them but now i see her for who she really is. No wonder she is not welcomed in her own sisters' houses.

    ReplyDelete
  40. Hmmmm!!!!!!! This can never ever work for a MIL that's a control freak and nags a lot.

    ReplyDelete
  41. this can only apply where the MIL is not a witch......those ones can only get off your back through prayer and fasting.....some have had to die for peace to reign...the most important thing is treat everyone like u would treat yourself and family, if they don't change then intense prayers must be made...u need to first understand y they behave the way they do and address issues from there..my mother inlaw did not want my hubby to marry when he did cos they wanted him to take care of the rest of his siblings."i must chop my pikin money syndrome"..they gave me attitude for a long time cos they thought every money we spent or all i had was bought by their brothers money...till something happened and they found out i earned more than their son and even spent more on the home they now started to respect themselves and are almost licking my arse...lol..nothing wrong in helping your siblings but you must not grow old while at it and the siblings too must not be lazy and hustle for themselves too.. typical of Nigerians to think cos they have a child abroad then he must take care of all the family expenses at the detriment of his immediate family....a mans priority should be his immediate family....if you feed extended family and neglect nuclear family cos you feel your wife works and should do all the work then sorry you are an infidel..there has to be a balance in everything we do in life. more so only a wicked woman will not allow a man help his family but should it be at the detriment of your own family? I don't do eye service oh, I give my MIL money, buy her stuff when I can, call her often but I don't go beyond my boundary neither do I let them cross ours

    ReplyDelete
  42. Over the years, I've given this MIL and DIL case a serious thought and one of things I've come to understand is that our mindset plays a major role in how we react to these things. Truth is, she'll definitely act/do things that would rob off wrongly. She's imperfect just as our own very mothers are too. They hurt us too by deir words/actions sometimes. But we are able to overlook that of our mothers easily. In most cases, we are able to express our dissatisfcation without fear of being labelled rude or called upon to ans queries before some elders..(lol)which is hardly the case when dealing with MIL. I think this lack of expression is what gives room for resentment and hate overtime.

    For me, I've found ways to balance these things. When my MIL who is somewhat overbearing/domineering starts with her attitude, i try to imagine what I'd do if it were my mum and though difficult, I'm able to tolerate and subtly register my points. Cos asides dat aspect of her, I still see a nice woman who loves her children just like I love mine and wants the best for them all. There are exceptions though as some people get am for MIL........LOL.
     

    ReplyDelete
  43. Stella, you are preaching to a dead wood.
    All these girls and women of nowadays are very stubborn. They will not hear.
    That's they all have wahalas and chronicles in their marriage.

    ReplyDelete
  44. Nice write up, I don't have problem with my MIL, SIL, BIL.

    ReplyDelete
  45. Ok o nice one. Will sure practice it when am married.

    ReplyDelete
  46. All I want is a mother inlaw like my mum! Amen

    ReplyDelete
  47. What abt a situation where your mother inlaw goes fetish? Visits prophets and spirituality because she feels you are the reason her son has not been providing enough for her. When the truth of it is dat the son is trying his best but doesn't have to meet all her needs. This is my present situation, only God will judge.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. my dear you are on point,those that ll be intested if you are pregnant,to know if thier charm worked,you don't fight spiritual battles physically or you pay with your life,and guess what nobody ll know what happened to you.ladies walk with God and he ll give you solution to your own cross.

      Delete
  48. I pray to have a good MILs,so I wouldn't have to go through all these hurdles.

    If she doesn't like me at first, she must like me by force o.

    I can't be comfortable around chaos or hatred.


    #WhiteDiamondOut

    ReplyDelete
  49. My mother in law is a sweet woman o..but she always complain about my dressing..she said I should never wear trousers to her house in the village..I obeyed o..when we go visit her,I wear only skirts or gown..trying to please her..she go still complain say the knee length skirt too short,that I should wear ankle length..see me see isoko woman o..I sha obey..the next time we went,I wore her kind of skirt,she complain say the hair when I fix too long..the next time went,I was on my natural hair and her ankle length skirt..she say my earrings too big,that I should only wear fullstop earring..see me see wahala..na there hubby vex, hala for her say if she continues to complain about how I dress,we'll stop coming to the village to see her. The next time we went,she say my shoe too high..LWKMD..that was the last time i went to isoko o..its been almost 3 years..hubby visits her alone.some MILs get problem abeg

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Instead make she just give you the full dress code from day one... Lol

      Delete
    2. So funny. She for give you full dress code truly ooooooo. Mama don old.

      Delete
  50. No matter what we married women should at all cost respect our mil' they raised our husband's and don't forget too that u will be a mil' someday.
    But the one I can't stand is a noisy sibling. My sil wanted to try rubbish in my home I dealt with her silently, can u imagine cos am married to your brother I should be serving you my mate. Well she's gone I have my peace.
    Ladies just because your brother is married to someone he is doing her a favour, they are both doing each other a favour so they are not your slave.

    ReplyDelete
  51. C your mouth.I guess u ain't married.

    ReplyDelete
  52. Some mother in law can be so mean, no matter the amount of love you showed to them they will never love or accept you. Have always pray for the best mother in law.

    ReplyDelete
  53. No BV will accept that their Mother-in law is wicked now. Watch them change mouth .


    Where is the Presidents wife?




    XOXO MYSTERY

    ReplyDelete
  54. Well...My mother in law is more like my late mother,,,She is the most amazing Woman. After my mother I have ever met.We gossip yes we do alot about even her husband and every other people.She talks to me like her daugher and even named me Uloma..I have always prayed from when I was little to have a mother in law like my mother..Don't ever pray to marry a man whose mother is dead(Most girls say that)you don't know why you are still single cos your mother in law is still alive..Pray all the time for anything and everything Good and God who sees the heart of men will answer you and grant your desire.

    ReplyDelete
  55. Lovely write up,i will surely try and love my mother in law

    ReplyDelete
  56. God pls bless me with a mother in law dat ll treat me d way my mum treats her daughter in laws

    ReplyDelete
  57. Its just about the mindset. I believe that no one is completely evil in life. Even though some people can be extremely wicked, you can always find ways to cope with them. Start off with everyone on a fresh footing and never draw conclusions about a person based on mere speculations and accusations by others. And don't be a sycophant from the beginning of the marriage, trying so hard to please her. Be nice, be respectful, be generous but know where to draw the line. She too will respect you in return

    ReplyDelete
  58. Best comment 1
    Vivian maxwell18 August 2015 at 15:35
    Well...My mother in law is more like my late mother,,,She is the most amazing Woman. After my mother I have ever met.We gossip yes we do alot about even her husband and every other people.She talks to me like her daugher and even named me Uloma..I have always prayed from when I was little to have a mother in law like my mother..Don't ever pray to marry a man whose mother is dead(Most girls say that)you don't know why you are still single cos your mother in law is still alive..Pray all the time for anything and everything Good and God who sees the heart of men will answer you and grant your desire.
    Best comment 2
    My mother in law is a sweet woman o..but she always complain about my dressing..she said I should never wear trousers to her house in the village..I obeyed o..when we go visit her,I wear only skirts or gown..trying to please her..she go still complain say the knee length skirt too short,that I should wear ankle length..see me see isoko woman o..I sha obey..the next time we went,I wore her kind of skirt,she complain say the hair when I fix too long..the next time went,I was on my natural hair and her ankle length skirt..she say my earrings too big,that I should only wear fullstop earring..see me see wahala..na there hubby vex, hala for her say if she continues to complain about how I dress,we'll stop coming to the village to see her. The next time we went,she say my shoe too high..LWKMD..that was the last time i went to isoko o..its been almost 3 years..hubby visits her alone.some MILs get problem abeg

    ReplyDelete
  59. Some mother inlaws are unreasonable. I rem when I first met my then bf, now husband's mom, I greet her na eye she eye me lol. I try win her over tire...I've given up.

    ReplyDelete
  60. Have being wanting to say this.
    People complain so much about MIL wen they have a very bad attitude themselves.
    I have the meanest MIL,she is always shouting on all her daughter in law except me,she can sacrifice her life for me just because i treat her like a queen.
    I am always speechless when we advice eachother to send our MIL away from his son's house.
    What if she is your mother?

    ReplyDelete
  61. Make Una come carry my own ! Una never meet some mil ,this yeye no go work o jare we don do am tire all of us wen marry into this famiy cant be the probs

    ReplyDelete
  62. I pray not to be in such a difficult situation like this. The MIL almost made her commit murder .OMG MIL pls help us nah!!! your husband was also someone's son and you a daughter in-law too why forget so soon ?????????? and my fellow daughter in-law pls tolerate her like you did with your mum. I believe we all can live together as one happy family. lets end this war b/w MIL and DIL.

    ReplyDelete
  63. Hmmmmmm MIL, loving them is not enough, relate with them prayerfully, they ve a strong hold on their sons especially widows, no matter how hard you try to be good, you will always be a rival for their son's affection

    ReplyDelete
  64. like say na MIL be d only prob, most times na sister inlaws ooo, choi!
    most of my friends 'ahula ihe' ooo meanwhile dem don marry ooo

    ReplyDelete
  65. Niz one Stella. Very educating too. Wow

    ReplyDelete
  66. My inlaws are what you call HORRID,all of them from my mother inlaw including all my dear hubby siblings,all 9 of them,my hubby is the last born of the family,its gotten so much,I've tried different ways to make them change but to no avail,am the sweetest woman on earth,people that knows me enjoy me and love me so much.I decided to I was not going to continue being unhappy with the ways my inlaws treat me,I cut off all ties with them cos they are just too troublesome,am talking about verbal abuse and physical abuse ooo,I told my hubby he can have a relationship with his family but to me they no longer exist in my world,and I've found peace, my marriage is working better now and am happy.and I always pray that my inlaws female children will never find a happy home,I wish my inlaws children every bad thing they have done to me and worst and even wish they don't find a man to love them.

    ReplyDelete
  67. Am going to be a good mother inlaw when my children gets married by the grace of GOD, I will be the sweetest mother inlaw ever.My own inlaws are really horrible,no amount of love I show them can kill the bile in them,my mother is equivalent to a witch and her children both men and women are her members of Congress, they are mean and very wicked,it is the grace of GOD that is seeing me through,I don't fight them I just keep my distance from them all,there is always this jealousy and envyness in them anytime they see me its really hard for them to hide how they feel about me.it even annoys them that me and my hubby are doing good and our love keeps growing,its not like they just act it ooo they say it out loud,they will open their mouth and outrightly tell me they don't like me,they will all gang upp and purposely ccome to our house to fight on trivial matters.Those people are something else,I just look and don't even open my mouth to waste my saliva on them,they're not worth it

    ReplyDelete

Disclaimer: Comments And Opinions On Any Part Of This Website Are Opinions Of The Blog Commenters Or Anonymous Persons And They Do Not Represent The Opinion Of StellaDimokoKorkus.com

Pictures and culled stories posted on this site are given credit and if a story is yours but credited to the wrong source,Please contact Stelladimokokorkus.com and corrections will be made..

If you have a complaint or a story,Please Contact StellaDimokoKorkus.com Via

Sdimokokorkus@gmail.com
Mobile Phone +4915210724141