Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narratives....

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Tuesday, June 21, 2016

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narratives....

This one na wah!





NARRATIVE NUMBER ONE
A MARRIAGE WITH PUNCHES FROM BOTH SIDES.

Good day Stella.
Trust you're doing great. Straight to the point. I'm a 25year old lady married to a 28year old man. We got married in October last year after dating for 2years and cohabiting for 2years.


I am trusting God for the fruit of the womb after aborting once for my now husband before we got married. My life has been a living hell due to the pressure my husband gives me. He lashed out at me at every opportunity for not giving him a child.

 I am a strong Christian and my hope is in God but I find myself now questioning my faith. I was diagnosed with PCOS after several tests and I'm judiciously using my medications. Many times I feel like sleeping and not waking up because my husband makes me feel worthless. I dread spending time with him because everything I say is always used against me.


Im very abusive as well because sometimes when we argue, I hit him first which leads to minutes with lasting blows on my body. Sometimes in the heat of it all, he dashed to the kitchen to get a knife claiming he's trying to scare me away.

When I try to explain or defend myself he claims I'm being mannerless and disrespectful. I love my husband and I wish he would treat me better. He compares his exes to me and say I'm the worst woman he's been with. I feel miserable Stella.

The recent one was he bought a property without telling me ( in his name and his moms name) ,when I confronted him he says he will do it over and over.


 I'm confused Stella. I'm thinking I should get out. I desperately want to hear from you and bvs. Is there hope for this marriage or not? I'm losing it! I'm slipping into depression. Please help me!



Where there is love and God,there is hope....Sebi he is using HIS money to buy properties in his name,unless you are also contributing you have no right to turn this into big deal,if you are not earning your own money,you have no right monitoring his investments cos it will only earn you insults in the situation you both have..YES You people have a situation,A BAD ONE..

Do you expect him to include your name?he is only reacting to the moment,maybe when things are better he might have a rethink.

Your case is complicated,you are both Violent,so if you are thinking of a way out,he might also be thinking same.
I don't understand how you people do it,how can you lean so much on one person that when they disappoint you,you break down?I am not emotionally available to allow anyone break me to this level,please sit up,stand up and either iron things out like mature adults or go your separate ways please.

AND IF YOU HAVE TO LEAN ON ANYTHING,especially now,please lean on God!

I wish you the best and hope i was not too harsh!


.......................................................................................................



NARRATIVE NUMBER TWO
 A HUSBAND WHO SHOOTS BLANK AND CONVINCING HIM
ON THE WAY FORWARD.

Hello Stella. I recently started reading your blog and i must confess I'm hooked. Thank you for doing such a good job and touching lives.

Straight to the point, i got married 3 years ago to the most amazing man ever and we have been TTC. For a long time i lived in guilt because i had a d & c when i was really young after which i retraced my steps back to God and abstained from sex. I thought my sins must have caught up with me and i confessed all to DH. He forgave me and told me my past didn't matter after all he wasn't a saint either.

After so many tests and scans, we discovered i was fine and had no fertility issues, so hubby decided to get tested too and we discovered he had azzospermia which means he had no sperm in his semen. We were broken as we really want children.

The issue now is i am willing to adopt a child as hubby's condition doesn't matter to me because he is everything to me. His love for me is unconditional and i feel the same. I just want and need a child to love and care for but hubby will not hear of it. He says no to donor sperm for IVF, no to adoption, no to even raising a family member's child. He says our baby will come but i am beginning to lose faith and hope as we have spent so much money on treatments. 

My home is empty, my arms are empty, my house is too clean, i need a child. Am i being selfish and how do i convince hubby to allow us adopt a child?

No cussing please. Thank you Stella.


I am sorry,i do not know what to say darling!



180 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. God will remember u guys at the appointed time

      Delete
    2. Mrs Korkus, sometimes ur advice dey get kleg. But then again u don bcom akata hence the advice

      Delete
    3. Poster 1,stay away frm dat horseband of urs o,using knife as a threat? D devil might tempt him one day o
      Poster 2,I feel ur pains dear but remember prayer is d key,tell God to change his mind. Am sure ur hubby is not giving up on his sperm,I suggest u do d same by praying along with his faith.All will be well

      Delete
    4. Stella pls mind what you say, when a husband or wife buys a property, especially the husband, it should be both In their names , you have lived in Nigeria b4, so you know this things , I don't appreciate all these your oyinbo advise and making the poor girl feel less of herself

      Delete
    5. Anonymous 21 June 2016 at 18.01
      If you read Stella very well and not rushing to show your beef about her oyinbo thins, you would understand! Mtcheeew. She said 'in the situation they are now'.go back go read. Pele!!

      Delete
    6. Oyibo self can never buy a property without including his wife. Dts the truth. The only negative I see here is the violence they both display.

      Delete
    7. Major problem is you're both TTC, what are you waiting for? C'mon, try the prayer/fasting for those TTC if you havent. God is on this blog.

      Delete
  2. Replies
    1. @Poster 2, I kno I can't imagine how hard it is for you rait now and facing the reality of things, but I think your husband is trying hard to use his faith to walk on water. May I beg you to pls join him, God is real, He honors the faith of His children and remember, 1 shall chase a 1000, while 2 shall chase 10,000m

      Delete
  3. Poster 1 ... are you WORKING or a stay at home mum? Please dont allow any IDIOT to make you worthless. You better ask Queen of the blog what you can do. Me no get advice for you.

    Poster 2... Ekpele. It is well

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Poster 1, why not be a better person 1st. I mean tame yourself 1st and after being a good person hubby still continues being who he's, take a break.

      Delete
    2. Yea poster one should get her acts well before complaining, maybe the fault is from you. Please dont abandon your marriage cos of pride and stubborness, add a little sugar and dnt forget to pray ceaselessly.

      Delete
  4. Poster two you really need to understand your hubby and you both should walk together. Just give him some times and also be praying, what if you were the one with issues?

    If you are TTC you need to be in terms with your spouse so that your prayers will be answered. All the best.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Poster one please that situation u call a marriage is extreme. I think u shud leave now while u can bcos the next time he picks up a knife, hmm.., he might actually use it on u.
    Poster two, jst give it time n pray. He is ur hubby, tell him how u feel, be emotional n cry n all... i think its a thing of pride. God see u through

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Poster 2: this made me weep. Keep believing God. God has forgiven ur past sins. He will surely pick ur call.

      Delete
  6. Today Chronicles made me scared of marriage...hmmmm

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. pls go and sit down @telema cr7 that's what u single ladies who can't find a man use in deceiving yourself, don't girlfriends and boyfriends fight too? always trying to paint marriage bad to mk your single selves feel better, what about d sweet successful marriages out there? problems are part of life whether married or not. marriage is a beautiful ting and I love it and am ready to be married over and over again.

      Delete
    2. pls go and sit down @telema cr7 that's what u single ladies who can't find a man use in deceiving yourself, don't girlfriends and boyfriends fight too? always trying to paint marriage bad to mk your single selves feel better, what about d sweet successful marriages out there? problems are part of life whether married or not. marriage is a beautiful ting and I love it and am ready to be married over and over again.

      Delete
    3. @telema go find man wey want marry you first.

      Delete
    4. Why are u attacking d girl for an honest comment she made? Why do u think she wont get married or are u guity? Dnt get it twisted, marriage is a beautiful thing with d right spouse nd not every single lady is unhappy. Some pple get married early while some late, whichever, it doesnt determine a lasting marriage or happiness. If u re happy in ur marriage, thank God md move on. U dnt need to diss a single lady cos wheather u like it or not, ur marriage can break tomorrow nd u ll return to singlehood. Please be wise!

      Delete
    5. After all you were once single,what makes you think your marriage is forever? It's ppl like you that God punishes. And besides most of u who come here to make noise about happy marriage are the ones living like poster 1.

      Delete
  7. Poster 1, you co-habitted with him for two years?

    ReplyDelete
  8. Poster 1

    That man doesn't love ❤ you
    I hope u didn't force him to marry you after dating him for 2years and cohabiting for 2 years
    Or maybe he married you out of pity...
    NNE don't mind his excesses but concentrate on Making babies
    Maybe birthing babies may bring the love ❤ you guys first shared
    Good luck 🍀

    Poster 2

    Are you sure ur hubby doesn't belong somewhere?

    ReplyDelete
  9. Poster 2
    You've just narrated what i've been going thru
    I believe all our stories will change for the better in Jesus name.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Will be back to say something. My batt3 is low.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I have said it before and I will continue saying it that most women looking for the fruit of womb have spiritual problems....mostly spiritual partners and marine spirit...
    See how your own spiritual husband want to frustrate you and your husband out of this marriage...
    Hmmmmm...

    Poster 2...
    Same thing with poster one...
    Women should stop blaming their childlessness on abortion!...I have done more that 50 abortions before getting married but yet I had my first child 8 months after our wedding...
    Madam,go and look for a man that will get you pregnant!...
    Your husband is just wasting your time...who knows,he might even have a child somewhere making him not to be bothered about you...remember time waits for no one..
    You will soon enter menopause with no child and that will be the worst!...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Queen, i was taking you serious until now. Take soffry dey lie biko. Later you people will be accusing nwajoka of lying.

      Delete
    2. Oniro nla. Olobo fife.

      Delete
    3. u people should not follow d mouth of Linda Eze o, she'll lead u to hell.

      Delete
    4. LMAO, to this statement. U are the celebity(SDK though) I'll like to hang out with. And the first question I'll ask u is "how do you it..... Being crazy and unique at the same time". No offense

      Delete
    5. Queen....you're just a case study.....infact I don even know what to say to you sef.....lmfao

      Delete
    6. Hshahahahahahaha@50 abortion.

      Delete
  12. Women that raise their hands to hit a man, una get madt liver o!
    smh!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. As in, I tell you. She even hits him first. She has a character flaw please. They are both cut from same cloth.

      Delete
  13. @ poster one.. .You are too young tobe married at 25. If you can't endure please file for a divorce. @ poster two.. I think you are the problem.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And if she sends a chronicle of looking for husband at 30yrs old,you will call her Aunty gwegz.I pity those that take opinions of these people serious.Well we have some intelligence ones like White diamond.

      Delete
    2. U are silly and ur comments are also silly as u. How is marrying at 25 be too early? Do u reason at all?

      Also how is poster 2 her problem? Did u read her post at all?

      Don't go n marry calm to be too young and be snatching pples husband your time is coming and yours will also be snatched.

      Am awaiting ur snm post for a partner when u are 70.

      Delete
  14. Stella, WTF r u saying? He is using his money to buy properties in his name and his mother's name and u say it's not a big deal? Abeg, no annoy me. She is his wife!!! For better, for worse!!!
    Madam wait, he's angry that u can't give him a child and u said u did an abortion for him after co-habiting for 2 years? 2 fucking years? Hahahahaha!!! Wonderful!!!
    Ur husband is a wicked man. Very wicked! And to think ur marriage is not even up to a year.

    Oh, and u r abusive too and violent? Lol. U guys r meant for each other jare. Lol. I'm sorry but u deserve better nau. Control your tongue.


    Poster 2: Eyah. Poster 2, I feel for u and your hubby. I think he's just sad and doesn't know how to go about it. Keep praying to God to change his mind and also heal your husband.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They are not even married for a year. ..Your hubby is a bush man...Women who be been pregnant before even gets pregnant faster as Virgins. It is the stress that is delaying it...You will be fine

      Delete
  15. Pls what med can be used for PCOS?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Going to a gynaecologist should be your medicine. Why would you come here asking for medicine for such serious issue?

      Delete
    2. Go and see a gynaecologist please. Pcos is not headache that you will take only panadol for and it goes away. You need to work with a gynaecologist for proper diagnosis and treatment.

      Delete
  16. Poster 1: the way most of these men reason is that the minute a child comes things change which makes u ask does it mean u weren't important all the while? He is being selfish at this point cos he's forgotten that u once got pregnant n terminated it.And for the beating and talking abt his exes my dear tighten ur seatbelt cos it might never end and no I won't say start praying cos if u start now and u see no changes u will start questioning God.

    Poster 2: Ndo my darling, God does not sleep nor slumber he will give u double for ur trouble and no u r not being selfish u r even a good woman trying to protect her own.Pray and ask God for wisdom in this time to reach an agreement with ur husband cos u might adopt today and tomorrow kids start coming God can use it to open the way.

    ReplyDelete
  17. This is why people should always be careful with the type of life they choose to live . U live with a man that is not ur horseband for two years and aborted a baby dat should hv been ur source of joy today.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Poster 1: I don't really know why I'm angry with you.. Please what exactly have you achieved in this life asides a d&c,cohabiting for 2yrs and getting married to a guy who obviously doesn't give a crap about you? I mean,at 25,you are totally dependent on another all round? This is one reason why I don't comment on CBvN,it annoys the shit out of me. Why marry him?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Welcome judgina

      Delete
    2. My dear poster one, your problems are as a result of cohabiting. It causes what I'll like to call see- finish before marriage. There is really nothing new and exciting about you to him, it probably contributing to the violence in your marriage.
      As much as I'll like to say pray and all that, there are practical steps you could take. Firstly, endeavor to walk away from his verbal abuses. When he starts, walk away, don't engage him. That should resolve any potential physical altercation. Create an air of mystery around yourself, be unavailable when he least expects, even if it means you going to chill at an eatery or the movies. Do things that make you happy, only you can make you happy and when you are happy, conception is easier. Do the bare minimum for him. He will behave better when you don't have his time.

      Poster 2. You are not being selfish, keep trying and one day an answer would come. Just give him some time

      Delete
    3. Thing is, whilst dating and cohabiting, they probably knew they weren't compatible, yet they got married. And just after a few months, you are asking questions you should have evaluated and worked with since before you got into this mess.

      You are 25 and probably immature. That is why you'd hit someone first. Be it a man or woman, do not hit people first. Learn some tact too. Women need to really mature mentally to delve into marriage.

      Marriage is not a race, see that you are ready and fit before you go in.

      Selah!

      Delete
    4. Ivory, so u think you know her life history based off of the short summary she sent to SDK. Stick with not commenting cos this was a fail

      Delete
  19. Pls what med can be used for PCOS?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Why Dont Nigerians like hospitals.please disaapear from here and go see a gynae.WTF

      Delete
  20. God take control poster 2 I really fell for u God will see you thru

    ReplyDelete
  21. Hubby is shooting blanks yet he doesn't want to consider any of the other options? If he is so close to God as in really close, leave him, he is exercising his faith, but if he isn't, he doesn't pray regularly, he is just a regular Christian, something is wrong somewhere, something diabolical or spiritual. Get closer to God Poster.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Poster 2: Are u sure hubby wasn't aware of his sterility? Dunno what to tell u. It's well.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Poster one
    Stop talking when you both are angry, stop hitting him. Your home's a battle field and I'm soooooo confused on your behalf. Just turn to God, He can do all things!

    Poster 2
    Join your faith with his and give this time. Maybe a few months or a year so by the time you bring the issue up,he'd know you've tried his option.Wish you luck!

    ReplyDelete
  24. Poster 1, I don't like the part where you hit your husband cos I can't even put the blames on him again.
    He is selfish. Why should he buy stuffs in his mum's name.
    Am thinking he's already planning life after you.
    So make your decisions fast and leave him. Am a man and I hate men that treat their wives badly especially when TTC.

    Poster 2: Take it to God in prayer.

    I love to adopt too

    ReplyDelete
  25. Replies
    1. Marriage no be baked beans, yet young girls will see it as a breakthrough & answered prayer.... Sometimes the devil give u marriage to destroy u emotionally.
      Have it at the back of ur mind that "Marriage is not meant for everyone" if you force it, na shit go come out.

      Delete
  26. D&C, D&C everywhere u go.
    Posters go and pray for forgiveness and start a new life. God is willing and faithful to forgive all ur pasts misdeeds and sins.

    P1 ur marriage was not found on a solid foundation (due to infatuation and cohabitation) and guy or hubby is immature in handling his marital challenges. Invite God to ur home and u shall have peace and give birth to many good children.

    P2 pray and change ur mindset. God may not always punish all ex abortionist with delay in childbearing due to azospermia stuff et al. Ur hubby need to start infertility treatment Asap while prayer is kept constant.

    btw I am not a pastor, I am a child of God.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Poster two read the power on the power of a praying wife, you both dated for two years and gbensh for that two years. Did you not see the signs all over?

    You cannot leave your marriage, stick to your husband but you need to work on your attitude and your temper. Learn to ignore some certain things as a woman. What do I even know when am not married self?????? Prayers is the best option.

    ReplyDelete
  28. No 2 is really sensitive. Let me sit back n absorb the comments.
    No 1... both of you need to get a rein on your tempers,talk and possibly visit a marriage counsellor. Young blood is at work here. Someone needs to be matured. Two lions can't rule a jungle. Where did it all start from? You both need to address it from the root. Hopefully the love will come back.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Poster1: Will u rather walk with ur feet out or you prefer to be carried out to a morgue? Like play Like play, he'd one day reach to the kitchen for the knife & that knife wld sink into ur flesh, na from clap them de enter dance.
    He's not mature enough for marriage, altho there are responsible 28yr olds all over, na just Buhari gov humble them for their papa house so!
    You're busy worrying about a property, if i were u i'd be more worried 4my safety & stability in that house.
    Pls whrs that lady that keeps posting "Young ladies why not keep this hole called vagina closed??".......

    Poster 2: No fear, no idiot get the right to cuss you, if ur DH wldnt bend to ur will, he shld at least tell u how long he's willing to be waiting for a miracle, cus a womans clock is ticking, is it when ur clock battery runs out completely b4 he'd consider other options?

    PS: Ladies learn to insist on a condom, it literally saves lives even more than car seatbelts...... Its bad enough ure fornicating, at least do it reasonable, there shldnt be it was a heat of passion thing!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Haba Stella! Ahn Ahn?
      Why will her husband not put her name on his investment or properties, is she not his wife?
      Would you like it if your husband does that to you regardless of the situation you guys are in? Your comment to poster one is too harsh and you sound like a sad judgina!
      What is it with you sef, be forming what I don't know as if you weren't born and bred in 9ja...mtschewww
      If you like don't post my comment, I'm really angry at what you wrote up there 😈😈😈

      Delete
    2. pls I support u @flow some of steller advice are so wrong and annoying how can u say is ok for a married man to buy property on his name alone when he has a wife? they are married and they are one I wonder if steller is really from african not to talk of Nigeria or maybe cos shes Rich and foot d whole bills in her home,pls is not ok atall.

      Delete
    3. pls I support u @flow some of steller advice are so wrong and annoying how can u say is ok for a married man to buy property on his name alone when he has a wife? they are married and they are one I wonder if steller is really from african not to talk of Nigeria or maybe cos shes Rich and foot d whole bills in her home,pls is not ok atall.

      Delete
  30. Poster 2,ur horseband is mean and selfish. Act quickly before you reach menopause. Since he is dragging his legs. Revive ur relationship with any of your ex u like his qualities. Don't tell him ur problem. Arrange and gbensh him during ur ovulation. U will get pregnant and ur horseband will think the child is his.
    A stich in time saves nine.
    The bitter truth is that you may spend all ur life waiting for a miraculous healing of ur horseband which may never happen.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. James if someone shud advice ur wife ds way ope u will like it

      Delete
    2. Please poster 2 ignore dis devilish comment! Gosh!!!! James,how do u sleep at night?????
      God will ans u both at the appointed time,all u need to do right now is put Ur trust in him and join hands with dh in prayers,its not always easy for men to adopt,it makes them feel like they ve given up. I feel your pain and I wish I could hug u right now. U can contact me so we can pray together.
      Poster 2....im touched by your story,u re too young to be going true all these...marriage is sweet when u re with the right person and no you re not too young to be married,just that Ur home was not built on the solid rock of christ...
      Please don't hit hubby first,he s already hot tempered and frustrated,dont trigger it! Ignore all his shortcomings and I suggest u walk away when he starts,its easier said than done but u can if u intend to keep dis marriage together!
      For now,ignore whatever prop he buys without Ur name,its painful I know but hey..look at the brighter side of life,by the time things get better he ll surely change some of his decisions now. Be happy,u ll conceive,be more loving to him and both of u should try counselling... all the best hun #e-hugs

      Delete
    3. But why wait indefinitely for this 'appointed time' when you can make yourself and a child happy by adoption or even an anonymous sperm donor if they wldnt be comfortable with using that of a known person. Its not easy for a woman who desires a child with all her heart to be told to wait indefinitely for when God will perform a miracle and revive Hubby's sperm. Again I repeat,its not easy! Before long,she will be frustrated and might start to resent the husband. The husband should not be selfish and let them consider other options...even if its just for one. She can use that one child and be waiting for the 'appointed time'

      Delete
  31. @ POSTER ONE- reading ur story gave me chills and i dnt want to end up like u cos we have similar stories. had an abortn for my bf two yrs back, we are still 2geda and i recently got a job in lagos, dnt knw anybody dere and had to put up with him pending d time i'm able to gt a place. i hope and pray i dnt end up like u cos ever since i had d abortn my mind has nt been @ rest.
    @poster 2, dnt knw what to say to u but i pray God intervenes in ur marriage and ur ome. i pray he surrounds ur table with children in jesus name

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wat if u pray to God nd ask him to forgive you nd bless u with an accommodation..,move out of his place nd start a new life.dnt make d same mistake

      Delete
  32. Hmmmmm....poster 1 and 2,God will bless you with your children IJN and here I am,questioning God why he gave me 3 beautiful children in 3 years....#fatherplsiamsorry

    ReplyDelete
  33. Poster one: Stop insulting or abusing your husband. Love begat love, start showing him love intentionally whether he reciprocates or not dont stop...he will love you back. He is human.


    Poster 2: Cast all your cares n burdens unto Jesus....He cares n loves you.

    #I am a fruitful vine, I am a joyful mother of children

    ReplyDelete
  34. Poster 1:u have to stop being violent and pray to God..it's not his fault dat is jst d way men act when the Baby is not coming..relax,pray more and worry less...u will have a Baby soon.
    Poster 2:trust God.a Baby will come .dnt be in a hurry yet..God's timing is perfect! Dnt rush things jst pray nd leave d rest to God

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is not the way NORMAL reasonable men react when TTC

      Delete
  35. Poster 2.you discovered that there's no sperm in your husband semen,i want to ask you this simple question, are you truly a Christian and if yes, where is your faith? Is there anything impossible to God almighty? And besides your marriage is just 3years now, My dear better begin now to ask God for mercy and learn how to trust in him, I know what am taking about

    ReplyDelete
  36. Stella abeg,enough of this your self righteousness and all what not.What do you mean by she has no right to complain if her husband buys properties only in his name?They are married and they are ONE!!! The properties should be in both their names.If she ever does same thing,I'm sure the foolish idiot of a husband would have raised hell on her.Abeg Stella,just stop it!!!

    ReplyDelete
  37. Poster 2...Ur husband is a very selfish and wicked at d same time..Why are u even still with him? If u were d one with d fertility problem i'm sure by now he has given another woman belle..Dont be fooled by his fake unconditional love..Why wont he love u unconditionally when he is notba complete man..Na dem dey like pass..Dont allow him make u miserable till ur death..He dont want donor sperm for IVF and he dont want adoption too..What sort of nonsense is dat?
    U go soon reach menopause and no child to take care of u or call u mummy..U will regret dis decision u took..God dont favour selfish people who cant show love to adopted babies.
    I have a friend like dat..She and her husband was like dat but her husband has kids before he married her..They were both against adoption..Dat my friend is over 50yrs now with no child to call her own while her husband is still enjoying d two boys he had before he married her..
    Get out of dat marriage and go and get pregnant to enjoy d sweetness and joy of motherhood..Its ur fundamental human right to carry ur own baby..Dont let any man deprive u dat joy..
    If u dont want to leave ur marriage,threaten ur husband dat u will leave him if he refuse to change his mind and allow u adopt..By d time u pretend to be packing ur things to move out,he change his mind sharp sharp..
    Dem never born dat man who will make me not to enjoy motherhood..Mbanu!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hopefully someday u'd grow up and think like a rational adult mortal. Amen!

      Delete
  38. Poster 1 ... U are not in love with ur husband, u are only attracted to him bcos of his money and he knows it...if Na poor man, u for don run tey tey

    ReplyDelete
  39. My teenage friend called today, crying that she was molested by her father...again!
    This breaks my heart.
    It always ruins my day!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. if she cnt report,.help her na... Una no knw whr police station de again? Until she carry belle abi? The mother nko??

      Delete
  40. Stelle and her nonsense advice again maybe because u are married to oyibo and u are more financialy boyant thats why u reason and judge d way u do, how can u not see somthing wrong in him buying property in his name alone when his married? for Gods sake they are married therefore they are one and should do tings together, what nonsense are u talking about stelle?pls is your marriage a contract cos u talk like is a contract where everyone is d head, if d guy want to be buying property alone let him divorce her wife but as long as they are married he should be doing it jointly thats what marriage is all about.

    even when I was fighting with my husband he still buys property in both of our names cause he should know d moment he buys in his name alone am gone, I don't have a job or income but he still respect me financially nomatter how much we fight and besides @poster u both are too young especially your husband married at 28 his still very young and fighting at this stage in marriage is ok cos u both are still leaning each other but not d level u guys are going about it, which one is bringing knife again kwa? what if one day he mistakinly stab u? and y will u as a woman 1st race your hand on your husband? didn't your parents train u or teach u respect? u both are not ready for marriage and when a guy keep telling u u'r his worst mistake very often that means u have to tink twice. for me u need God in your marriage, God alone will help, pls go down and pray with all your heart and also ask God for d forgiveness of sins, I did dsame and he favored me, God is your answer

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    Replies
    1. I don't understand d buying of properties in wife or husband's name. My dad is late,mom is 60 ,and all d property my dad has is in his name, and I was named d next of kin even when I was a baby,they had no problem, nobody dragged property with us, Infact we are all enjoying, when I marry, my property will be in my name n my wife will be my next of kin. I don't understand why women are clamouring for properties in my name, or is there something to it?

      Delete
  41. Stelle and her nonsense advice again maybe because u are married to oyibo and u are more financialy boyant thats why u reason and judge d way u do, how can u not see somthing wrong in him buying property in his name alone when his married? for Gods sake they are married therefore they are one and should do tings together, what nonsense are u talking about stelle?pls is your marriage a contract cos u talk like is a contract where everyone is d head, if d guy want to be buying property alone let him divorce her wife but as long as they are married he should be doing it jointly thats what marriage is all about.

    even when I was fighting with my husband he still buys property in both of our names cause he should know d moment he buys in his name alone am gone, I don't have a job or income but he still respect me financially nomatter how much we fight and besides @poster u both are too young especially your husband married at 28 his still very young and fighting at this stage in marriage is ok cos u both are still leaning each other but not d level u guys are going about it, which one is bringing knife again kwa? what if one day he mistakinly stab u? and y will u as a woman 1st race your hand on your husband? didn't your parents train u or teach u respect? u both are not ready for marriage and when a guy keep telling u u'r his worst mistake very often that means u have to tink twice. for me u need God in your marriage, God alone will help, pls go down and pray with all your heart and also ask God for d forgiveness of sins, I did dsame and he favored me, God is your answer

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  42. Stelle and her nonsense advice again maybe because u are married to oyibo and u are more financialy boyant thats why u reason and judge d way u do, how can u not see somthing wrong in him buying property in his name alone when his married? for Gods sake they are married therefore they are one and should do tings together, what nonsense are u talking about stelle?pls is your marriage a contract cos u talk like is a contract where everyone is d head, if d guy want to be buying property alone let him divorce her wife but as long as they are married he should be doing it jointly thats what marriage is all about.

    even when I was fighting with my husband he still buys property in both of our names cause he should know d moment he buys in his name alone am gone, I don't have a job or income but he still respect me financially nomatter how much we fight and besides @poster u both are too young especially your husband married at 28 his still very young and fighting at this stage in marriage is ok cos u both are still leaning each other but not d level u guys are going about it, which one is bringing knife again kwa? what if one day he mistakinly stab u? and y will u as a woman 1st race your hand on your husband? didn't your parents train u or teach u respect? u both are not ready for marriage and when a guy keep telling u u'r his worst mistake very often that means u have to tink twice. for me u need God in your marriage, God alone will help, pls go down and pray with all your heart and also ask God for d forgiveness of sins, I did dsame and he favored me, God is your answer

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  43. Poster 1 this is so messy, you guys fight?
    Like a normal thing?
    I bet you ve been fighting while cohabiting before marriage cos its so normal to you now.
    Atleast he knows you are not barren?
    Both of you should go for test n baby girl if your womb was messed up during that abortion then you are done for.
    With the way him and his mum are going, they ve already arranged another wife/child bearing machine, they are just waiting for her to take it to throw you out.

    ReplyDelete
  44. Poster 1- This is a volatile situation. You both need to leave that marriage. Don't bring a child into that situation
    Poster 2 - 3 years is still young. Keep the faith. People ve kids after 20 yrs no need to have BP since your husband is not pressuring you but you. Join the TCC prayers with your husband. Come to winners chapel a. God will answer you both in due time. Marriage is not only for procreation but for companionship. My bestie just had a child after 9 years of waiting and during the period she and her husband worked hard on their relation and made it so strong. they were each others bestie. the child that came after 9 years was just icing on a very beautiful cake.

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  45. I dont know why men are soooo selfish
    They ll never agree to a donor sperm, but women use donor eggs all the time just to help them carry their biological child.
    When i was working in a fertility clinic, young boys usually come around to find out if we have started using male donors, why cos their fellow unilag students(the girls) always donate and collect money.
    One met me one day and said we should consider him, that any amount is better than him washing it off the bathroom floor.
    No market for them cos our selfish nigerian men with their mentality ll not pay for a strangers sperm and raise a strangers son smh
    Madam i hope you are not close to menopause,
    You must really love him to consider adoption,
    Its time to be firm with him, let him know he doesn't have any option, its not about him!
    Give him an ultimatum to agree with the donor sperm or adoption or you walk... Simple

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    Replies
    1. Don't mind this our Nigerian men and their mentality. Now he will be forming God will do it( not saying God cannot or will not do it) but if the wife is feeling so empty without a child,especially with the situation at hand,why not consider other options for now so she can be happy? Anonymous sperm donor is the way to go here,nobody needs know how she got pregnant. Or adopt. Selfish,selfish,selfish!

      Delete
  46. Poster 1...
    Thank ur stars dat ur husband loves u..Yes! Dat man loves u so much to tolerate ur character..How can u hit a man first? Are u not ever afraid of him? U lacks respect..I wonder what u will be doin to ur house maid..Ur will flog a housemaid mercilessly for bedwetting..If u can raise ur hand and hit a grown ass man,then i wonder what u will do to ur fellow woman..U ar hot tempered too..I can imagine u tongue lashing ur husband and insulting his whole family..
    U have abused dat man to d extent dat he has to run to d kitchen bring knife in self defence..One day he will stab u on d chest..

    Is not bcos u were running mouth dat i will one day kill him and take over his property dat prompted him to buy property in his own name and made his mom his next of kin? Were u even expecting him to put ur name when u have turned to tiger at home..If i were him i will do d same..Give dat man a breathing space..U werent raised properly daz why u moved into his house and lived for two years before he married u..He don see u finish nah..
    Stop being a bitch..U will soon loose dat man if u are not careful..U are childless yet u dont want ur head to come down..Ur fellow TTC women are doing everything womanly posible to get pregnant and u are there beating up ur husband.If u kill him u will go to JAIL!!
    If u can nolonger stand him pls walk away from dat marriage..E no be by force.

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    Replies
    1. @money makers wife I support your coment so much, u make so much sense, after reading your coment I felt so bad for d poor hopeless man, I also feel bad for my previous coment where I was supported d lady, and u are right he gets d knife to scare her away from abusing him, how can u as a woman 1st race a hand on a man not to talk of a husband? dont u have respect? u no dey fear? is your husband that small in your eyes? and now I understand y his buying d property in his name I tink his right d woman is a bad wife and don't deserve a man like that, pls at poster change from your evil ways or leave the poor man alone u are very troublesome if his my brother I would hv cm and kick u out of that house long ago.

      Delete
    2. @money makers wife I support your coment so much, u make so much sense, after reading your coment I felt so bad for d poor hopeless man, I also feel bad for my previous coment where I was supported d lady, and u are right he gets d knife to scare her away from abusing him, how can u as a woman 1st race a hand on a man not to talk of a husband? dont u have respect? u no dey fear? is your husband that small in your eyes? and now I understand y his buying d property in his name I tink his right d woman is a bad wife and don't deserve a man like that, pls at poster change from your evil ways or leave the poor man alone u are very troublesome if his my brother I would hv cm and kick u out of that house long ago.

      Delete
    3. Now I agree with you on this point but not for the second poster.

      Poster 1 to me isn't a wife material and I won't pray for such for my brother. Tueh!

      Delete
    4. @MMW, stop being a bitch???
      A bv said today that her horseband calls her a bitch always and she loves it. even in presence of their kids.

      Delete
  47. Poster 2,your child(ren) will come..don't lose faith,you would be sending in your testimony soon..i have God and i know him..
    Poster 1,you cohabited for two years and everything was fine? Now that you are married, there are problems...I pray God fix your marriage, confess your sins and turn to him..1John 1:9.

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  48. Postet1,go and do something meaningful with your life.o.k stop depending on a man's wealth. Mtcheew. I hate lazy women.
    Poster2. Your husband is very sefish.haba. He can't impregnate u yet he doesn't support other methods of child bearing. Allah isowuka this kind of husband ooo. Sannu kinijiko,continue praying for him or u dumped his selfish a**.

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  49. When one hear other people's encounter, then one needs to go down on ones kneels and Give Thanks to God.
    Both Story really scary,
    Poster One, Kindly trace back when both of you where in love.
    Your hubby must have a weak spot?
    You having a sharp tongue and throwing fist at your man is not a good, especially when you want him and still love him. I doubt it if you true to your words by tracing your steps to God cos the bible doesn't say all this you doing.
    My Advance win the love of your husband back and you will have peace and when there is peace there is love and when love comes love making appears and frequent loving making belly shows and with Prayer.... SHIKENA
    Poster two, if you a committed reader on SDK then you should have read testimony regarding child birth and infertility.
    Keep your faith alive and also seek natural herbal medicine from original source, nothing is impossible when the Almighty is with you.
    God Be With You Both.

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  50. please stella how can you advice her not to be worried that he is buying property in him and his mom name. are you serious? do you know what women face in this lawless country? she is being set up to fail. clearly they both have issues and personally I think they may be to close in age. However, he is clearly not looking out for her, he doesn't value her and his actions depict this. They are one and should make decisions as one. WHEN YOU MARRY YOUR SPOUSE SHOULD BECOME YOUR NEXT OF KIN. Why is his mothers name on there????????

    If something should happen tomorrow, say he dies *God forbid* WHAT WILL HER AND HER CHILDREN HAVE? all my dads properties are in my moms name that shows foresight and protective measure. clearly he only values his mom. sad.

    poster please do not take this lightly, this is going to turn out very badly for you, I smell nollywood on the horizon. make peace with this so could husband work out your issues.

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  51. Poster 1: your marriage seems dead already and only divine intervention can resurrect it. If u want to save your marriage pls turn to God. You also need to put in a lot of effort; stop acting violent towards your hubby, start showing him love, when he says hurtful words to u, smile at him....by God's grace he will change.
    Poster2: your husband is selfish! You are willing to put up with his azoooo....and he doesn't even want u to adopt a child, why don't u threaten him that u will leave him if he doesn't allow u adopt a child.

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  52. With God, all things are possible!

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  53. Poster 2, my heart goes out to you..... I don't even know what to say to you as I understand your yearning to care for your own child.
    I believe that children come from God and fertility is not subject to man's interpretation but you have to exercise Abrahamaic faith- I reckon that is what your husband is hoping you both can do. It certainly isn't easy but perhaps you can begin to visit a motherless babies home and be a mother to those kids....? It's only a suggestion but I certainly feel your despair and pray that you can find the strength within you to hold out in faith as you wait on God to bless your home with children.
    God bless you.

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  54. Poster 1, pls send me an email. i need to parcel something down to you asap. You will carry your child next year.your case of TTC na small one.

    But you need to work on your temper. always apply emotional intelligence in whatever you do.

    Poster 2, your husband can boost his hormones.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ur email address pls

      Delete
    2. @Anon 18:40..Click on her ID and check for her email address nah.

      Delete
    3. Click on her name or image nah
      Waoooooo Marriage marriage am learning here

      Delete
  55. Someone pls educate me... azzospermia Can't be improved with meds so they can do ivf??

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    Replies
    1. No it cant be. But they can still do ivf by trying to get sperm from the testis. NO guarantees of finding sperm there though. Faith and prayer

      Delete
  56. Poster one and two,this is the time to seek the face of God. Our God is not a wicked God. He is bigger than what we think of him. That you terminated pregnancy does not mean you are not going to have children. I have heard of people that gave birth to eight children with no womb. Note that once you open your mouth and ask God to forgive you,he has forgiven you. Look for those ttc post and take part in it. Use those bible potions on ttc post to fast and pray at midnight. Pray earnestly and remind God his words. Tell God to make his words "none shall be barren in the land" to come to pass in your life. Poster two,if your husband say "wait"then wait. He is waiting on God to give him children,which God will still give him at the right time. It is well.

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  57. keep at it my DEAR, give him time, his Ego is hurt. He needs some time to deal with his new reality.
    Relax for a bit, and give him 6 months to a year. Regain his trust by drawing closer to him, take up a hobby together like tennis, swimming, playing guitar, anything to make you guys closer together.
    Also Use that time to work on your own career, save money, improve on yourself.(prepare your mind and body for your baby)Do not bring up the issue of baby with him..

    After this time revisit the issue again, tell him its time to expand the family and it is not a matter of empty house or hand, but that you know that he will be a good father. Explain to him that God has plans for him to be a father but Gods ways are mysterious. They are not the ways of man. do not pressure him just take it small small in a loving but persistent manner. He will come around.

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  58. Poster 2 - Trust and keep faith. God is still in the business of doing wonders.

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  59. Narrative number one...Abeg leave that husband of yours or better still,you both should separate for a while before one person go kill the other due to anger or bitterness later



    Narrative number 2.....Sorry.....Your husband is very proud,... He is not even ashamed of himself...He can't ""produce"" yet he I thus proud...Later now his family member WL come and start blaming you for not able to get pregnant... He better let you go for IVF or adoption.....it he refuses.. Abeg leave am....You have to have a child....Old age without children Na suffer ness..... God don give these doctors wisdom to do IVF and sperm donor or for you to adopt....No woman should say they don't have children or even child



    @Galore

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  60. My lips are sealed on both chronicles. I will pray for you both after I have finished praying for Nigeria which is not on my bucket list.

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  61. Poster 2. I felt so sad when you said "my house is too clean" you are really desperate to have a child which ever form or way, which is goob but also not healthy. Take sometime out to talk and pray with your hubby.....what he needs right now is not your options about adoption but a shoulder to lean on, some one who still believes in him and also having faith in him.
    Poster 1. I am just your age, and I am married. Going tru ish in my marriage as well but not domestic abuse, mine is rather emotional abuse and being with a control freak. I think we are not ready for marriage, it's not really about the age but the circumstances surrounding our relationships. I think it will be better if your guys separate for a while and have a rethink about your marriage..... Maybe you should to somewhere just to get some air, I am going to do that as well. Marriage is so twisted if you dnt get it right, just like a puzzle.

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  62. Poster 2 I wish we could talk one on one. My hubby has Azospermia too as it was diagnosed in 3 hospitals in the UK. But there is no situation God can't change. I believed in the word of God and prayers. After fasting and prayers and taking some supplements 3yrs ago we went for a check and his semen wasn't azo anymore. We did an IVF which failed but it still didn't let me down. He was placed on local herbs and the result is wonderful. I can tell you that I am now warming up knowing fully that a positive result is on the way as I am presently boosting so that my eggs would readily available.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Please what supplements?

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    2. Please what's your contact?

      Delete
    3. Or email?

      Delete
  63. Poster 2. I felt so sad when you said "my house is too clean" you are really desperate to have a child which ever form or way, which is goob but also not healthy. Take sometime out to talk and pray with your hubby.....what he needs right now is not your options about adoption but a shoulder to lean on, some one who still believes in him and also having faith in him.
    Poster 1. I am just your age, and I am married. Going tru ish in my marriage as well but not domestic abuse, mine is rather emotional abuse and being with a control freak. I think we are not ready for marriage, it's not really about the age but the circumstances surrounding our relationships. I think it will be better if your guys separate for a while and have a rethink about your marriage..... Maybe you should go somewhere just to get some air, I am going to do that as well. Marriage is so twisted if you dnt get it right, just like a puzzle.

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  64. POSTER ONE: I DUNNO WHAT TO SAY I THINK EVERYTHING HAS BEEN CAUSED BY 'SEE-FINISH'SYNDROME. PLS RETRACE YOUR STEPS AND START ACTING LIKE ADULTS

    POSTER TWO: I KNOW YOU DONT NEED AN IOTA OF PITY BUT MY HEART WAS BROKEN WHEN I READ YOUR STORY. I KNOW YOU WOULD HEAR PRAY TO GOD BUT I KNOW ITS ALL DIFFICULT LET'S FACE THE TRUTH. BUT STILL CONTINUE TO BELIEVE IN HIM , I KNOW A MIRACLE IS ON THE WAY. STILL PRAY AND STILL TALK TO DEAR HUBBY ABOUT THE ADOPTION WHEN HE IS IN A GOOD MOOD, U KNOW HIS BUTTONS NOW. **E-HUGS AND KISSES**

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    Replies
    1. Please stop typing in caps. Please am begging you.

      Delete
  65. Poster 2,God is able to do all things. Join your faith with DH and table your case to God. It shall be well

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  66. U cohabited, aborted before marriage. Now u r violent. Pls how r u a strong Christian? Bcos u go to church regularly? A Christian is virtuous in character and filled with faith. You lack both, not judging u but u need to improve urself. Stop looking at ur hubbys property, instead pray to God to soften his heart and to be more understanding to ur condition.

    Poster 2: ur hubby is just being selfish bcos he is d one with d problem. Very soon pple with start calling u Childless or Barren not knowing its oga dat is empty

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    Replies
    1. Ndo judgina

      Delete
    2. Dimple Yokozuna with her fallen breast that is touching her knee...don't ever write shit under my comment again!...you better go and face those rubbish you sell and look for a man that will marry you...
      Idiot!...

      Delete
  67. Stella, your response to the first narrative is so on point. Well done!

    It's time some women know their life is theirs, married or single and no one can look after you like you.

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  68. It is well...I'll be back to read comments, make I find food chop first.

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  69. Aftermath of Abortion is the worse thing a lady can experience,I had a medical abortion few years ago for my now husband, I bleed for more than a month, when I went to my gynecologist to complain his facial expression as he was checking what is wrong gave me so mch concern,I didn't bother to ask him cause I didn't want to hear any bad news, I was scared and he gave me injections which I took for 3 days and the bleeding stopped and my circle came back to normal. I broke up with bf as soon as I was okay cause I didn't want to continue having sex, I felt worse, I was mental down, I cry all the time, I think everyday about my future, if I will ever have a child. Then after I got better I went to church and the first thing my pastor said to me was I should never ever try abortion when I get I get pregnant that I'm not too young, else it will be difficult to conceive in the future,I felt worse that day, I was crying in church, I had to run to my car to cry some more, so many thing was on my mind, I wished I had gone to church and the pastor told me this before I did the Abortion. So my husband( bf then) came back and started begging, I accepted because I felt we have to go through the pains together, I don't want to marry someone knowing I might have damaged something in the womb, so I accepted him back and we got married 2 years after... Whenever my period comes, I think this is it! The worse has happened! I was always looking forward to that end of month to know if my period will come on not, in all this my husband was supportive Infact I blame him always and he will beg me, 2years 3 months after I got pregnant, I didn't Believe it, I was happy, I started shopping from the moment I found out. My point is abortion guilt can't kill, never ever will I abort again o, never! Only if it's stand has a risk to my health.

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  70. Stella, so a husband has the right to buy a property in his name and his mom's only when he has a wife???? Ok. Poster 1, the both of you should talk things out since you both are violent and it's a major issue in your marriage. Peace.

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  71. P1 your hubby is a wicked man, Pls leave that marriage, I hate men that put pressure for kids...the marriage never reach 1yr sef.
    P2 try and convince ur hubby for a sperm donor, if the reverse was the case now he for Don go born outside, shine ur eye, make sure u carry your own baby.

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  72. P1 your hubby is a wicked man, Pls leave that marriage, I hate men that put pressure for kids...the marriage never reach 1yr sef.
    P2 try and convince ur hubby for a sperm donor, if the reverse was the case now he for Don go born outside, shine ur eye, make sure u carry your own baby.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Let me not sound like James, poster 1 obviously knows that she needs to work on her attitude. Work more on yourself madam become a woman that your husband would want to have as a wife he should be proud of you, groom yourself so when even you sre what you have become you will be proud of your accomplishments.Have sophistication and class, rise above things that are petty, wake up with a purpose, look forward to achieving a better you. Just take baby steps a day at a time. You can be that great, sophisticated, calm, loving wife and mother just put your mind into it you will see a better you.

      Delete
  73. P2 keep pleading with him esp towards adoption. You might even get a family friend whom he respects to talk to him... God is able dear, don't lose hope, keep trusting.

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  74. P1, see finish syndrome that's y ur hubby is behaving dis way. P2, If you were to be in your husband's shoes, ll he be patient enough?

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  75. @ poster 1&2, tell God to fix ur family and with faith God will direct ur path.

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  76. Poster 2- Work on your attitude/temper, in fact, you need Jesus more.

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  77. Haba Stella! Ahn Ahn?
    Why will her husband not put her name on his investment or properties, is she not his wife?
    Would you like it if your husband does that to you regardless of the situation you guys are in? Your comment to poster one is too harsh and you sound like a sad judgina!
    What is it with you sef, be forming what I don't know as if you weren't born and bred in 9ja...mtschewww
    If you like don't post my comment, I'm really angry at what you wrote up there 😈😈😈

    ReplyDelete
  78. Poster 2: Have you heard of micro Testicular sperm extraction (micro TESE)?
    Please consult an assisted reproduction specialist. There is a chance that you can get pregnant using your husband's sperm.

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  79. I don't understand d buying of properties in wife or husband's name. My dad is late,mom is 60 ,and all d property my dad has is in his name, and I was named d next of kin even when I was a baby,they had no problem, nobody dragged property with us, Infact we are all enjoying, when I marry, my property will be in my name n my wife will be my next of kin. I don't understand why women are clamouring for properties in my name, or is there something to it?

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  80. POSTER 1....... DO NOT USE YOUR HANDS TO SPOIL YOUR HOME ,WHY U DEY FIRST BEAT YOUR HUSBAND NA ..STOP-IT,YOU ARE TEACHING HIM TO BE BEATING YOU.

    POSTER 2.....GOD'S TIME IS THE BEST..IN THE MAIN TIME KEEP ENCOURAGING YOUR HUSBAND TO EITHER ADOPT OR TRAIN A RELATIVE'S CHILD. NA SO MY AUNTY DO THAT TIME ,GOD COME BLESS HER WITH HER OWN PIKIN

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  81. Stella how can you not know what to say? where lies your faith. Dear Poster 2 please put all your trust in God. He will answer you and give you multiple testimonies. I have seen or heard of cases like this. Also keep trying to convince him about a sperm donor..one day God will touch his heart..okay!. Poster 1, you caused your marital problems, why hit him first? After women will come out and cry about Violence against women. Please give your husband Peace so you too can have Peace. The first few years of marriage is always rocky but you ladies will surely overcome this stage and begin to enjoy your homes in Jesus Mighty Name. Amen! The only solution is prayers, always remember.

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  82. Stella how can you not know what to say? where lies your faith. Dear Poster 2 please put all your trust in God. He will answer you and give you multiple testimonies. I have seen or heard of cases like this. Also keep trying to convince him about a sperm donor..one day God will touch his heart..okay!. Poster 1, you caused your marital problems, why hit him first? After women will come out and cry about Violence against women. Please give your husband Peace so you too can have Peace. The first few years of marriage is always rocky but you ladies will surely overcome this stage and begin to enjoy your homes in Jesus Mighty Name. Amen! The only solution is prayers, always remember.

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  83. SDK don make u 4get say the actual spelling na "Husband" and not horseband dat u keep spelling.

    ReplyDelete
  84. Poster 1: Be grateful that you haven't brought a child into this messy toxic relationship yet. I suggest you get counselling individually, then as a couple, pulling knives during a fight is never a good sign unless you're both ninjas. I disagree with Stella about him being right with buying property in his own name regardless of whether you are putting money into the purchase or not. He shouldn't be hiding anything from you.

    Poster 2.
    I'll share a story of a woman I know. She was married for 22 years to a man who was never able to get her pregnant and she ran from doctor to doctor who all told her she could have a baby naturally. Her husband refuses to get tested and insisted nothing was wrong with him. Even though he could never point to a woman who ever got pregnant for him. Well in her 23rd yr of marriage, she came home one day from her business and met her things packed downstairs and a well known "keziah" was sporting a huge baby bump. Her husband had "travelled" & left the mistress to inform his wife of over 2 decades that she had been sacked. She wasn't even allowed to retrieve anything else from the house and was sent on her way. Well as few months later when the new wife returned with her baby, it was obvious that the father of this child was white or middle eastern but oga was so elated about "his first son" that his barren wife was unable to give him. Madam was distraught but had already started the early stages of menopause by the time she got over the whole nasty affair. Her ex husband divorced her fully and married the baby mama who had 2 more children after the first, all looking very different from each other. Madam eventually adopted 2 children of her own. I have no advice just that story to tell. It's a true story

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    Replies
    1. Well said..@Poster2..Read dis comment and borrow some sense.

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  85. P1 hubby could pass as my ex. He lashes out at me and turns every incident against me. Calls me all sorts of names, makes ridiculous accusations and makes me beg for everything. Compares me to his ex girlfriends, how drop dead pretty and rich they were. He tries his best to make me feel insecure and yet he denies doing any of this. He claims he isn't perfect, but dude is never wrong. He claims to love me so much but doesn't act the part. He tells you what you wanna hear, Promise heaven and earth but couldn't support me when I needed his little assistance. He was talking marriage but he threatens to end things over a little disagreement..starts blocking me on every am network.. Until I talk him out of it. That way he manipulates me and made me feel I destroyed what we had. His ego stinks, and can't apologize. I shocked him the last time he pulled his stunt. We haven't spoken since then and av found peace. God has been faithful, I can pursue my dreams without having any man dictate the way my life goes. I pray God grants you wisdom, happiness and answers your prayers.

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  86. Poster 2, I was in the same situatuon several years ago. Afrer waiting for 4 years, I was ready to adopt. Miraculously I got pregnant and today I have 2 kids. Don't pressure your husband but rather tell God to turn his heart so you guys can agree on a way forward. If you are adopting do it quick, so you dont spend 10 to 12 year b4 doing it. Right now I am in the process of adopting a little girl since pregnancy refused to come again. Good luck.

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  87. I feel like saying something to day...so let me try.
    Poster 1. ..I feel sorry for you because you're young but Your marriage is almost dead on arrival. domestic violence, TTC, emotional abusive husband. Plus the fact that he has excluded you from his property. The only good aspect to your story is that you still love him. because of that maybe you still have hope. But since he doesn't love you and there's no baby in the equation for now.... why don't you walk out clean and consider remarrying much later after your lessons have been learnt? I am throwing the options at you so you can evaluate your options clearly .
    If you decide to stay back. Restrategize. Ignore his bad behaviors, try to promote peace as much is possible, avoid unnecessary confrontations. Most importantly get a job or get busy at something. forget the fact that he excluded you from the property.Dont worry God will give you yours. do these and see if the marriage will repair.

    Poster two. See his head.! if you were the one with the problems will he tolerate such conditions from you? he would have since arranged himself somewhere. I am not saying you should not trust God. By all means do. There's nothing God cannot do . ..But its not your medical problem per say? What ever you do don't be childless all the days of your life because of someone else. Unless of course you don't really care for kids. hence be proactive. spiritually , medically and socially.

    Good luck to you both.

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  88. Linda Ezeh, you seems to be very confused. It is 500 abortions not 50.
    Useless attention seeker

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  89. You see, both posters are in a period of testing. But they are of little faith. Become praying wives humbly.THIS IS HOW TOTRUST IN GOD

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  90. Poster one, acquire your own property na. You and your hubby are heavenly made. Why worry yourself when he is the one you aborted for? You guys are both under stress that is why you can't make babies. But If you want to leave, please do it immediately now you still have time. You can never tell if the next man you will be with will give you the joy you've always wanted.

    Poster two, Sorry oh! sister take heart. God will surely prove himself strong and mighty in your life. You really need to relax and keep praying + trusting in God.


    Madam Stella, your advise to poster one, hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. I really wonder what the statement "for better for worse means" and "for two shall become one".

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  91. My dear,
    I feel your pain do much becos I am in the same shoes as yours.My husband has an Azospermia situation.He won't take his medication,it took us 6 yrs for him to go to the hospital to get checked.he ruined the relationship btw myself and his family by updating them on happenings in our home.The marriage is in shambles as I have lived in bitterness,anger and revenge for a couple of months.almost at the verge of divorce until our pastors intervened recently.At least yours is a peaceful home.Be glad

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  92. IF YOU DO NOT FAST AND PRAY THE CONSEQUENCES OF ABORTION IS JUST WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE; "NO FAMILY OF YOUR OWN"; SEE EXODUS 1.

    Yes, those women the did not obey the king in killing the Hebrew Newborns were "GIVEN FAMILIES OF THEIR OWN" as a reward from the Lord.

    There is something ABOUT ABORTIONS which I'd like us to see. When one kills (or encourages the killing of; see Prov. 6:16-17) innocent children, the consequences are three. 1. You deny yourself the joy of having a home (remember the Hebrew midwives who spared babies against Pharaoh's advice to kill them; God rewarded them with families; Ex.1) 2. You risk "sudden death" in the hands of another fellow/accidents etc. remember Gen.9:6 and thirdly, you deny yourself eternal life! What a life! God isn't going to call you to glory if you do not repent. Jesus said; come to me all you that labor and are heavy laden and I will give you rest; that's Matt. 11:28. If you do not repent, you'd keep on laboring for the Serpent. But if you repent and make Jesus your Lord today and begin to read your scriptures; you'd find peace and the above three lots will not be yours. God bless you.

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  93. Poster 2.The bible says None shall be barren,my sister you have not worked for that to come to pass in your life,women without wombs have birthed kids,so no semen is nothing,search the bible for scriptures that relate to your need from God,send me your email address and i would send you a book by bishop Oyedapo.Give your life to christ,otherwise it would be crisis.also words of men give you fear,word of God gives you faith.words of a great man of God.Pls read the following Exodus 23v26.
    Deut.7v14.so sister having said all these,just be sharing the word with people,matt 6v33 win souls,preach,give,help you would see the handiwork of God.Poster1:repent you hear,Romans 8v1.is what you need oh!

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  94. When you kill kids, God will not give you a family of your own. Except you mourn for those kids; yes like serious fasting. If you lost a kid, how many days do you stay before eating? Yes and you have to accept the atoning death of Jesus.

    For poster 1, that getting a knife is to kill you which is just the consequences of shedding innocent blood; see Proverbs 6:16-17

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  95. A colleague of mine who owns and runs a hospital does "abortions of all kinds". I had always wondered that in spite of being a well trained specialist, he seemed to have settled on just aborting kids and it gave him so much money. No matter how much we (his colleagues) warned him to "reform his practice", he did not take heed. Once he was travelling with his wife and two kids on an interstate highway, he suddenly began to scream; "look at that kid crossing the highway, imagine that kid . . .!" His wife who was seated on the front passenger seat told him that she couldn't see any kid, His kids behind said same (the man NEVER had any psychological issues in life and was NEVER on any addictive substance). next he matched on the breaks and the car flipped severally. He woke up after a few days in a hospital and when he asked about his family, was told that they were all dead; he began to weep. He wanted to get up and found that he was limbless.
    Exodus 1:15 The king of Egypt said to the Hebrew midwives, whose names were Shiphrah and Puah, 16“When you are helping the Hebrew women during childbirth on the delivery stool, if you see that the baby is a boy, kill him; but if it is a girl, let her live.” 17The midwives, however, feared God and did not do what the king of Egypt had told them to do; they let the boys live. 18Then the king of Egypt summoned the midwives and asked them, “Why have you done this? Why have you let the boys live?”
    19The midwives answered Pharaoh, “Hebrew women are not like Egyptian women; they are vigorous and give birth before the midwives arrive.”
    20So God was kind to the midwives and the people increased and became even more numerous. 21And because the midwives feared God, he gave them families of their own. NIV

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    Replies
    1. Anon 18:32 aka Lady Igo, well done

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    2. So if everyone died who told you the
      story? Just say you don't like abortion and move

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  96. GHello everyone. Thanks for chipping in a thing or two. I have learnt from my mistakes, I have prayed and our parents have intervened. I will try not to be confrontational henceforth .

    I'm not a lazy woman ,I had a well-paying job but I quit to start my own business which is doing very well if I must add.

    I have prayed and fasted and I'm looking up to God to heal my marriage and bless me with a baby.

    To the judges and Judginas of the blog. Thank you. I am a Christian meaning I'm not perfect I'm only a work in progress.


    As per the property issue, I believe I will be successful. Heck I'm trying for my age and I still have a long way to go. So I'm not interested in what my husband has or doesn't have. What is mine will never elude me. I was only concerned that in marriage, 2 becomes 1 so naturally I was shocked. We learn everyday. I will work for mine and i will make me happy. Thanks y'all for your contribution. God bless

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  97. Poster2 put yourself in your husband's position let's say the fault was from you. Would you have accepted the kind of pressure you are putting on him? Relax GOD is in control. As long as you guyz are working towards having your biological kids it shall come to fruition.

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  98. Stella,ur advice to poster 1 is exactly what was going thru my mind as I read thru,u took d words out of my mouth,ur words have made me strong. Poster 1,since there are no kids yet,you cld get a job,make ur own money,get busy so u will be emotionally unavailable. Poster two,with God,ur case is not hopeless, He has the spare organs(sperm) because He is the creator,everything u nid in life is in the Holy Bible,make it ur companion, pay less attention to internet. All the best

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  99. Stella,ur advice to poster 1 is exactly what was going thru my mind as I read thru,u took d words out of my mouth,ur words have made me strong. Poster 1,since there are no kids yet,you cld get a job,make ur own money,get busy so u will be emotionally unavailable. Poster two,with God,ur case is not hopeless, He has the spare organs(sperm) because He is the creator,everything u nid in life is in the Holy Bible,make it ur companion, pay less attention to internet. All the best

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  100. Poster one: Hmmm.
    How will you put you are a strong Christian together with violence and abusive. The Lord will help you. Join Deeper life Church to know what a strong Christian is all about.

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  101. Just like my elder sis used to say that she would rather prefer her son to marry a baby mama than a single lady that has aborted all her child mmmmmm.
    Dear poster 1 all i can tell u is that it will be well with u guys cuz i cant tell u to leave ur hubby oo but then again i cant tell u to stay in a domestic violence marriage i will advice u to go for a counselling cuz na delicate matter be dis.
    Poster 2 are u on cheap drugs na ??? Oo no vex why would ur hubby kick against u adopting when the pro is from him so he doesn't want u to have a child of ur own mmmm am suspecting that man are u sure he doesnt have a child outside???
    Mmmmmmm madam u better use ur tongue to count ur teeth na my advice be that sowie am harsh but sometimes we need to push u guys out of ur comfort zone

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  102. Queen, 50 abortions!!!!!!!!! I do not believe you, lai lai. Haba

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  103. Dear poster 1 & 2 : do you both know that there is God?? And he is still in the business of Blessing people?
    Now let go all your worries, pain, frustrations etc and start all over with God.
    Join the TTC prayer post and get serious about it, there is a prayer session that takes care of the sperm and the abortion ish.
    Truth is if you all can find a way back to your hubby's heart so they can join you during the prayers and fasting, trust me it will go a long way.
    Buy the book " Supernatural Childbirth by Jackie Mize. The book is for people trying to conceive till delivery. This book has the power to boast back your faith in God, and there are confessions that both you and your hubby would confess every time as you so please.
    Please what I just described up there is way cheaper than those medical procedure you will put yourself through.
    If you have never trusted God now is the TIME.
    Ok o I pray you both will tab into God's Grace with so much Trust and believe, trust me it will not be easy, so make up your mind to win this. It your hands. Goodluck.

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  104. Thank you every one for your comments. I am grateful for the kind comments and advice. I sincerely appreciate your prayers and in the course of reading the comments, i realised how blessed i am, baby or baby and i am letting go of my unbelief and doubts. I am standing in faith with my husband that our prayers will be answered by God's grace. James and Queen, ur comments really cracked me up and me less melancholy. God bless everyone of you.

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  105. Poster 1: you need to really seek and know God cos dts the only way u'd fine peace, learn self-control and cast ur burdens on him. U both r reacting harshly to the situation. U hv to learn to click the ignore button when ur hubby starts releasing hurtful words. It's not going to be easy, and even with as much support as u may get, u need to fight this battle urself and make your home. Hold to his promises in Psalm 23. Some say u r too young to be in this? How about fighting it and telling them about how u dealt with the devil in ur marriage at 25! Also, if u dont hv anything doing, get busy. Find something no matter how little. It helps u hv other things to dwell on rather than ur challenges all the time. I await ur testimony.

    Poster 2. Ur husband is really hurting bad knowing he's the reason for the issue. A blow on his ego. Men r not allow to openly shed tears or show depression in the society we live in but they do hv their times. 3 yrs may seem so long yet not long enough for u to mount pressure on the other options u r seeking. This is time to support him, understand his pain and help him heal and see beyond it. Pressuring him at this point will definitely hv negative consequences.You r the woman of the house, calm down and follow him at his pace. Ur patience and perseverance will surely pay off.

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