Hmmmmmm...
THE HUSBESTIE SITUATION
A woman I call a sister from another mother.
I got married, she became friends with my husband as I trusted her with my life. Unbeknownst to me, they started sleeping together when I gave birth. I found out one night when I went to check on my twins, my husband wasn't in bed, and she was practically staying with us to help out.
I found my husband's head in-between her legs in my babies room. I collapsed.
I woke up in hospital. I cried and "crood" I fainted n woke up, my heart broke into 20 pièces.
My husband begged, oh he begged!
After a year, i went back. My ex bestie, she avoided me. He didn't marry her, she couldn't get pregnant for him. She's has left him as he didn't stop cheating on her, but I'm in the picture(no xxx) eating my cake and having it.
She has tried to apologise to me, no way. I still live in the main house while he lives in a rented flat changing women like pant. My husband and I are like besties now.
He still cheats coz he will tell me "babe, this new girl too money conscious " , I'd reply "you think she loves your pot belly, skinny arse and gray beards?" He'd always ask us to try again, but that ship has sailed. We are married besties, if there's a word like that.
So pick up your self esteem if you are in a situation like this, do intermittent fasting and play nice to your husband again, show that girl that you are still in the picture. You may not be like me, coz I don't attach emotions to everything. I make lemonade out of lemons.
Some people may not agree with my lifestyle, but it's working for me and working well. I have no desire to divorce him, and we're cool with that. He can spend months with the kids and I in the main house, I have no issues with that. I have healed and happy with my decisions so far. He is a fantastic "husbestie" but still cheating
WOW...what a motivational story....
WOW!!!
I like how your mind works,you turned your lemons into lemonade
He's living his best life enjoying the best of both worlds. Sha make sure you use protection ooo.
ReplyDelete@Aboki, you didn’t read where she wrote no sex?
DeletePoster, I love your last two paragraphs. But I “dieded” when I read “head between her legs “ part. You are wise. I don’t believe in extreme gbas gbos that still leaves me miserable. I will always take care of me and do my best to take advantage of parts that keeps my mind and body together. Because you need to be of sound mind and healthy body to be a mother to your children. Divorce process is not for the faint hearted. It takes a whole new level of toll mentally and physically. Children too need their father’s money and presence. With your kind of wisdom, I believe you don’t even need advice from the people here. You will figure out what to do with the rest of your youth while you still have it.
Well done madam.
Nobody is worth dying for at the end of the day when it's not working and our peace is threatened we should turn to God for direction.
ReplyDeleteSometimes separation is good it helps you recalibrate.
Heartbreak isn't a joke it is as serious as a life threatening disease i know someone who almost became mentally unstable from a toxic marriage today they're separated and life is going on. What I dont like is how she told so much lies about her husband and to the kids and have deprived them of their father.
Wow!! So for the past ten years, you haven't knacked? If no, how are you coping?
ReplyDeleteSome people can actually live life without sleeping with a man you know. You will be surprised to know that so many married couples have stopped having s*x for more than 10 years and most of the women are not getting it anywhere else nor are they missing it, this is simply because some women are wired that way.
DeleteS*x is a spiritual thing and I think people should be careful who they get entangled with.
Last time I had sex was December 2019. Me sef try
DeleteS*x is not food nah.
DeleteOP you need to work on your writing. Reading this made me dizzy. You wrote a lot but still said nothing.
ReplyDeleteSo you didn't understand the layman English that she used for us here? You prefer the over ambiguous ones?
DeleteDoggie why must spoil a nice story. U such bad energy . Guy change ooo
DeleteYou can read it again and again, I am sure at the third attempt you will understand her. She only took a step that is working for her, no devorce yet no marriage.
DeleteNo heart attack,no heart break what of std ?
ReplyDeleteDid she say they are sleeping together?
DeleteOr that they are besties?
Best revenge ever .
ReplyDeleteBe happy,have joy,have peace and love yourself more .
Nobody can break me again..
Na wah o, bestie isonu, that's why some married women always cut their females friends off after getting married, of all the men in this world, you can't cheat with another man, except your bestie's husband, see the outcome now, she lost friendship, relationship and her dignity.
ReplyDelete😎 Do whatever makes you feel happy in life.
ReplyDeleteEnjoy your decision and as long as it makes you happy just keep it up
ReplyDeleteHmmmm!
ReplyDeleteAre you still intimate with him?
My sort of co-parenting is also a misery to so many people but it's working for us.
Every one should do what works for them.
You’re lucky my dear. Co-parenting is impossible with some men.
DeleteAs long as you are happy, your children are good. Just fire on with your decision, some female friends are devil in sheep clothing.
ReplyDeleteI love your attitude and would’ve loved a more detailed story.
ReplyDeleteThere should be boundaries to bringing your besties (both male and female)to your home. Besties have been breaking homes since two thousand years ago...
ReplyDeleteAs much as I love that you're happy, abeg I don't think I can apply this to mine.
ReplyDeleteGod bless you.
ReplyDeleteBut forgive him from your heart and move on, if that makes you happy.
As long as you are happy. Life is too short for worries and stress.
ReplyDeleteNah Person wey know person they kill am oooo..
ReplyDeleteGood you Have Move On..
Please Just Take very good Care Of Yourself..
Hello iya Boys
I hope you're being careful ooo.... sleeping with a community penis can lead to sti's or worse hiv or aids
ReplyDeleteAre you guys blind or daft? She clearly said NO S£X involved!!!!!!
DeleteGood to know you are happy but I don't envy you. I read how you mentioned living in the main house several.times, guess small things give you joy. You have children who are watching you and your supposed ex bestie. Remember kids copy what we do and not what we say.
ReplyDeleteAs per your ex girlfriend friend, she was never a friend. Friends don't cross boundaries no matter what.
Remember okafor's law and use protection.
Zaram! One of the very few with reality in mind whenever she she opens her mouth or heart.
DeleteWhy are you people not blaming the man for sleeping with his wife's friend?
ReplyDeleteDid the man write chronicles? Is he here to read our judgement?
DeleteWetin concern us with the dog of a man?
DeleteNa postar be my main concern, because it sounds like she's living in lala land.
Make the man no go dash her a lifetime infection.
If you really know the meaning of "Man", you go know say there's no way in hell that that man isn't gbeshing her.😎
Because men are expected to have no or low morals is my guess. A man of good character and moral fortitude is supposedly next to impossible to find, so much isn’t expected of most of them🤷🏽♀️
DeleteAnon16.07 na ppl like you vote who out naija for this situation...u no read the chronicles?
DeleteStory!!
ReplyDeleteIf I hear say Una no dey nack.😆
Why will she lie ? Werey
DeleteNice!!!
ReplyDeleteI love it when women pick up themselves up after a heart break. Since it is working for you, no wahala!!!
So how do you scratch your itch?? You use him or you have someone in the picture??
How do you scratch your itch? I have heard this several times. Does it mean a matured woman cannot stay off sex for years after a heartbreak of divorce? When one is dead in Christ, every flesh desires becomes easy to overcome.
DeletePut your fingers or put robb
DeleteThank you @Zaram. Dying to flesh.
DeleteHmmm 🤔🤔🤔
ReplyDeleteAll we need is wisdom to overcome storms in marriages.God can still bring healing to your home.He can make your husband stop cheating and make him free from any form of deadly infections after going for medical tests,thats the power of the holy spirit. i pray for complete healing in your marriage.
ReplyDeleteYou normal so?
DeleteThis is super story
ReplyDeleteGlad that you've defined and found your peace in the midst of it all. Might not be an ideal situation, but i can't fault you at all. All parties seems happy, that's all that matters.
ReplyDeleteWell done. Izzy no easy at all, so well done work.
ReplyDeleteThe man will regret all these rubbishes, soon.
DeleteThe intermittent fasting. Such a life changer. I wish everyone would hop on it
ReplyDeleteHmmmmmm
ReplyDeleteThe Most Complex B
You’re strong - undeniably so. You’ve done what many wouldn’t dare, and I admire the mindset, though I was even more moved by your words. You crawled through betrayal and rose with your head held high. That alone is worthy of honour. Commendably, you redefined what peace means to you. But love, making peace with the mess doesn’t mean the mess stopped hurting. Let’s not pretend that calling it “eating your cake” somehow makes it nourishing.
ReplyDeleteI wish more scorned women could tap into your mental toughness - especially when family is involved. But laughing with the same man who once shattered you, brushing off the wreckage like dust, isn't healing. That’s surviving on autopilot. Coping, at best. And while coping gets you through, it’s not the same as being whole. It may look like lemonade, but it’s still made from bitter fruit.
So don’t mistake numbness for strength or distance for peace. You deserve more than just managing pain. You deserve a life that doesn’t demand you to always toughen up to survive. That’s your next chapter. You’ve conquered the major hurdle. Now, you owe it to yourself - and to your children - to live a truth that doesn’t just make you appear strong, but lets you feel respected, alive, and truly free.
Be mindful of what the children are learning from all this. Don’t grow too comfortable normalising chaos under the guise of resilience. Because even if wounds are dressed in silk, they still fester if left unclean - unless there’s true forgiveness and reconciliation. Your pain taught you how to sit in the fire without letting it consume you. And for that, once again, I honour your courage and your simple, powerful way of navigating the mind.