Women after given birth are vulnerable to suffer from postnatal depression. Postnatal depression suddenly breaks into the life of a mother 6-8 weeks after childbirth. It steals the happiness that accompanies having a baby.
Many new mothers experience this severe depression without recognising it or realising that it is a treatable illness. This causes needless distress and can have a negative impact on the child, family and friends. Some mothers are occupied with the care of her “bundle of joy” distracted by the way she feels, sometime happens to notice depressive symptoms but tries to ignore in order to avoid stigma, personality tests and remains diagnosed.
Postnatal depression may develop more slowly and may not be noticeable until several weeks after the baby’s birth. Women suffering from postnatal depression have disclosed that they feel like “death warmed up” and are “afraid to be alive”. Sometimes some mothers gets more irritated, lonely, distressing, frightened, thinking, “I feel like a bad mother”, “I can’t cope with this anymore”.
Most depressed mothers feel tired and lack energy. They may feel unable to concentrate or find simple tasks confusing. Some mothers experience pains with no apparent cause (other than tension and anxiety). Many have problems sleeping and a poor appetite. Many depressed mothers lose interest in sex. Each of these feelings, thoughts leads to an action that has an adverse effect on her relationship with the infant, marital, family and social relationship. She does not find the postnatal period a positive or pleasant experience.
Although the illness can be temporary, managed and is very treatable, you may need lots of help and support from family and friend before you recover. Everyone around you needs to accept that you are unwell and they need to treat you as if you had a physical illness. Having enough rest will also help you recover, so let family and friends take on as many of the everyday jobs that you can give up. But when you are feeling better, do as much as you want to. It’s common to have bad and good days with this illness.
If you hate being left alone, ask your husband, family and friends to try and organise for someone to be with you for much of the time. Physical contact from a partner in the form of hugging and cuddling can also be very reassuring – especially if the sexual side of your relationship has been affected.
If you have postnatal depression it is very beneficial to speak with family and friends.
It is also worth chatting with your doctor or healthcare professional on how you feel and they could provide you with support. More than anything, you need to have faith that you will get better in the end – even if your recovery seems slow. Try to look after yourself, rest as much as you can and try not to worry about aches and pains. Eat well – it’s especially important not to miss meals and you would remain happy and enjoy caring for your baby, “the joy of motherhood”.
To support and help continue the research on “Maximizing the potentials of mobile applications to support women with postnatal depression contact:
Omobolanle Adeyeye
Research Student
School of Computing
University of Portsmouth
Email: bola.adeyeye@port.ac.uk
*Anyone reading this ever suffered from this?can you please share your experience and how you over came this?I am really also interested in this topic because I think it affects early marriages and most men do not understand this phase that their wives pass through.
Waiting for comments! But Sdk, some of this symptoms can still be seen in non nursing woman! Is it not realted to "moodswing"
ReplyDeleteGod will help us. I was feeling very bad after I had my first baby but I think mine had to do with the environment. I was just not happy with where I was staying and it made me feel terrible but I was too scared to say it out. I just kept praying and I overcame it
DeleteHmmm.I went thru this shii,thank God for me.d story too long,where do I start from.was in labor oo,had a successive dilation,was about 9cm filaed wen d doc on duty came and asked me 2 push cos he had another appointment somewhere,and he didn't even check if I had reached 10cm.he was even changing while taking my delivery,I had my baby girl,but my cervix ruptured,was bleeding,d dr packed pads inside me and left,still bleeding,#first time mom#didnt knw I was dying, d other doc came,she wasn't a gynea couldn't stitch up my cervix,okay o, till 12am,Dr aburime from central hospital came,was put on d wheel chair,felt myself leaving ds world.d only tin I heard was my mom inlaw speaking in tongues,I. Came back 2 life,I heard d dr telling pple in d theathre,its a 50/50 chance.they battled saving my life after 4 hours.was. Given 4 pints of blood,normal delivery dat would have cost 30k,we spent 140k,well sha.thank God for giving me back my life. 2 weeks later started bleeding from d uterus,cos my womd didn't contract,rushed back 2 hospital,dey stopped d bleeding,2 weeks later I had jaundice,*maybe cos of the transfusion.na afer den I enter PND.I was hysterical,cried every minute,shouted at everybody,hubby was frustrated,dey tot I had gone mad.after few months b4 dem knw say na PND dey worry me.a dr counselled me and I got out of it.d trauma was 2 much.omg,let me not start crying as am typing this.thank u lord.
DeleteI was a little depressed too after giving birth to my baby. I felt helpless cos my baby was always crying and I don't kw why or what I should do about it. I felt sore all over. Had a big tear(episiotomy) and painful stitches. My breast was all sore cos my baby kept biting me. Sleepless night and no appetite. This happened 4 about 2months.@my 6weeks appointment I talked to the doc and he told me to always ask for help whenever I needed it. And to find time 2 relax like make sure I sleep whenever baby is asleep. He also talked 2 my hubby 2 help with the baby . It got beta. I and my baby formed a routine. Time to sleep,play, cry and bond. Its been a great journey. Motherhood rocks
DeleteOmg!! Queen mother you suffered! Gosh!! Can deliveries be this complicated??
DeleteThat doctor deserves a visit back with lawyers in tow!
@supermom...mothercare nipple creams helped me a lot..infact they come in big tubes that so far I have handed over to 2 colleagues already!hehe maybe il inherit it back again!
Hmnnn... Finally i can let it all out just at d right portal (appropriate topic)
DeleteSo, this morning my hubby cald me a vry wicked mother and he said dat 3times just because i mildly hit out 3 year old son who was glaringly naughty... I type dis in tears cos i look at wot v been thru.
Several years down d line but am stil battling wit depression all by myself... Dec 9, 2011 i was pregnant and post-dated by a few days, i suddenly started feeling severe headache (neva had it so bad) at d same time i was booked to see d doc same day, got to d hospital for my routine check up, baby's heart beat &all. I complained abt d severe migraine &DOC asked dat i be admitted (thank God for dat) as i suddenly started convulsing at midnite (it was eclampsia pls note there was no single sign of pre-eclampsia during antenatal as i was prefectly ok)
I was rushed into d threatre for an emergency CS after getn my hubby's consent ova d fone... After d CS at 3am i fell into a Coma. Oh my, i was in ICU for 3weeks, one ish up unto anoda... Had to even go for a CT scan (brain/comprehensive head check) as everytin didnt seem ohk wit me...
Eventually i was discharged weeks later... Got home to to my mother and mother-inlaw fighting, no one paid attention to me or my health, no one cared for me or showed me support. I started rigorous chores almost immediately even wen my stitches hadnt healed up. My MIL was so mean & unsupportive, my mother had stopped visiting, my hubby was unavoidably absent (he travelled) i was skipping my drug dosage cos i wasnt eating well. II felt so alone in d world to say i was traumatized is an understatement, i fell into a depression and was rushed to d hospital cos i was talking non-stop (had so much bottled up but dere was/is no one to share wit... Had a lot of question as a young first time mom but no one to ask, i had switched off my fone for several weeks didnt wana speak or see anyone. So bad dat i didnt wana see even my own baby. I had resented him (DEPRESSION still remains 80% root cause of why some women dump dier babies) I practically dumped him wit my MIL even when she visits me at d hospital wit him i ask dat she dosent bring him in. Cos u alwys felt i had failed him (he hadnt tasted bossom milk all dis while cos i ws on some strong medication) NO SINGLE BOND existed btw my son and I dat alone broke me d more... i slipped deeper into it... at some point i was almost suicidal
@Queen mother lots of love from me you went through hell because of a stupid unqualified doctor. Why did you have to pay that bill I think you and your family should go back and Sue like seriously.
DeleteAnon I feel ur pain,I had an emergency cs a few yrs ago,when my mother in law came she called me all kinds of names did a lot to me that when I remember I still shed tears,hubby supported his mom I cried day and and night it was so bad I wasn't allowed to feed my child she made all the decisions,said my breast milk was sour and so baby wont take it,later she called her children to report me for stopping breastfeeding,I went into a deep depression had several tests done . Just had a baby this week,got back from hospital to meet hostility may God of our kids deal with all these pple
Deletei think post natal should involve fathers and PND should be addressed at that session.
ReplyDeletethe best way to deal with PND is having loved ones around... people who can understand your mood swings when it sets in.
it is very dangerous for a new mom to be left alone with the baby. its either they cry unecessarily, or get paranoid over nothing. some are even suicidal.
the hormones are some strong force mehnnn
Joy of having a child best feeling tho. be you a single mother or married mother.
ReplyDeleteHow do i post a comment?
ReplyDeleteU just posted a comment now lol
DeleteYou just did na
DeleteU just did.
DeleteU just did.
DeleteLmao! U just did na
DeleteOponu radarada!
DeleteWelcome JJC! You are also welcome to the Dept of Anons.
DeleteI suffered from this when I had my baby boy. It started immediately he was brought out because I did several scans that said I was having a girl(i've always wanted a mini me). Imagine my shock when a boy came out. Due to the fact that I had a cs I couldn't bond with my son the first couple of days. When we were discharged and went home, I just wanted to be left alone. My mum just couldn't understand and she kept shouting at me to take care of my child. As I was a single mother, my depression was times two. I hated to hear my baby cry and he refused breast milk, so that was frustrating as well. I came through it believe it or not from going through the popular blogs (SDK was number one on my list) the comments always used to make me laugh so hard especially when BV's attack each other. My dear Stella, that's how I came out of it o! Little by little happiness flowed back into my life. My boy is 2 years old now and he's the cutest joy ever. I wouldn't have wanted it any other way.
ReplyDeleteWe thank God
DeleteOMG!!!...I got this too. I didnt think it was real until i had my baby. Mine set in 2 weeks after i'd had him. I would speak to mum and just burst out crying...initially my husband didnt get why i wasnt happy i'd had a baby until his sister explained post natal depression was reallll....Lucky for me, i had the health visitor who came home to see us, my husband was extremely supportive and hands on so much that when i couldnt be bothered, he took over and let me be alone. I think the solution here is extra love and support because for new mums like me, the experience is overwhelming - from the child birth process to coming home.
ReplyDeleteThank goodness, it passed and now, i can't do without my bubba....
Hmmm,loosing a child is the worse of all pain and trauma.I pray no one experience it but those that have experienced it knows better.The thought of that alone should encourage those that see their child alive that there are worse trauma than stress of raising a child and the burden that comes with it..Loosing a child especially wen the pregnancy was a hard one can run a woman insane bcos its same process,hot water bath,sitting on poo,etc.God continue to strengthen me bcos it so hard to forget.People that lost a child face more trauma,I hope this encourages all mothers that survive labour and have the pleasure of seeing their CHILD.
ReplyDeleteDont worry, God will bless you with your own live and healthy children.
DeleteHugsss
DeleteGod is your strength
You will come out strong boo
Just hold on to your faith
God will give you double for your trouble
We would come and bath the babies for you and cook omugwo food while you breastfeed you bundles of joy
Sorry dear, you shall not lose any of your children again. Thanks for sharing.
DeleteMay God give u double for ur tears in Jesus Name!
DeleteDidn't experienced anything of such. Waiting to read from those that av experienced it. #stella'slearningblog#
ReplyDeleteIt is well. Lemme sit & learn
ReplyDeleteLet the comment flow...., I really need to read and know their solutions
ReplyDeleteA new baby changes one's life and the family structure.
ReplyDeleteBuh wit d right support and environment,Ã new mom wil do just fine.
I havent suffered from it Buh i have read extensively about It.
The major culprit is LACK OF SLEEP and REST....
And i can relate wit this...cos i get cranky wen i dont have enough sleep so i was very careful....
Luckily ma babies sleep through the night so i retire early.Buh i tell moms wit night non-sleeping babies,to sleep d sec d baby sleeps.just try.
.Then surround urself wit love,laughter n happy people.this also aids in breast milk flow.
Rest rest rest! Our society is such dat u get guests from d hospital sef....
So prépare for dis.or if u can,tell DH u r not emotionally ready to receive guests.
Buh if d reverse is d case,get à good support system....mom,nannies n help.u are on standby to receive n entertain the guests.
New moms have à lot of what i call leaky émotion...things dat arent serious may Make one cry.u feel overwhelmed sometimes.
Talk to Ur hubby or a close friend.Buh more importantly,Make sure u rest well.
Eat wel.take loads of water.n remain focused on ur new bundle of Joy.
Dress nicely n stil Make out wit hubby,even if u aerent going all d way...Hahaha
Most importantly,recognize the sings and get help IMMEDIATELY wen all seems to not be working.
Pls Note dat dis sickness is actually very dangerous....Many Women Who didnt seek help ended up killing their precious babies...
How Are u Adaorah? And our bun?
And Iphie Sweets and all other expectant Moms.....God is ur Strength Darlings.....It will end in Praise,Amen.
Good Morning Blog Fam.
Wow! Didn't know what made me take my time reading this, God bless you for your Children. You would live long to do your right in their lives.
DeleteYou wrote it all..
DeleteWell my slight unhappiness came from the fact that I couldn't up and leave with hubby you know..like my life,freedom was over! I got over it with time..my mom was around,i easily eased into my baby's new schedule..
But last night I don't know what happened,i just started crying with my girl...who normally is just a sweetheart..she refused to be consoled...her dad tried and didn't suceed,i just took her,entered the room and started crying with her!
Had a long day at work! Plus all the raging hormones,nausea,constant eating!!! I am still grateful for my life...I am favoured!
Shout out to all the mothers,mothers to be,!!!!
Oil money how are you pushing it??
Nwuye General the Epistle writer! Kikikiki
DeleteWow! With all these stories here, I can't be more scared than I am now *whew*.
DeleteAmén,Amen and Amen @ Tolu MzT.
DeleteNne MAy ur days be Long,rich and Blessed,Amén and may God Grant u all ur heart desires,amén.
@ Iphie,Awwww...sending u warm Hugs Sis.
@ Bloggie,nne kedu?
I de your side oh!
DeleteMake i wait for comments.
ReplyDeleteSuicidal condition. Some even kill d newborn. It starts from loneliness, then hot tears, then..... Happened to a neighbor, d husband took her home to Okpella in Etsako to go be wit her own family. She recovered fully though. God is awesome.
ReplyDeleteXhlrted p
Prior to reading this piece I thought post-natal depression is more common with the white people than blacks.more especially nigerian women.I once watched this reality show where a white woman that just gave birth was talking about how irritated she gets each time her baby suckles.she says she always feels like pushing the baby away each time the baby latches on.I could tell by watching that it could be an early sign of post natal depression.I have neither heard nor read or seen any nigerian woman suffering from post natal depression.I guess this is one of those subjects am ignorant of.I will sit back and read comments as I am very interested in this particular subject.
ReplyDelete@miss dakota, it is not only d whites ooo, it happens to most women not all. It happened to me, when I found out my husband was cheating on me, God knows, I wanted to go for D and C, I thank almighty God dat during dat time, my mom was around, I hated d baby I was carrying in my womb, could not stand my husband, could not get over I imaging him cheating, wanted to leave him and his girls, ooh lest I go forget, I ready have 2 lovely girls, my life was a mess. Fast forward to 37weeks, my labour was just 30 mins and my son came out very fast, as if he knew what I wanted to do to him then, finally we went home, dat was when d problems started from, could not stand his crying, in short I hated birthing him, I will leave him with my family members and go out for hours, pls nobody should cuss me, just narrating my story, I wanted out of d marriage, my mom, aunt, and my in laws made peace, in d labour room, my husband was asking for forgiveness, even b4 I put to bed, he was begging, the begging was too much, like say me I be God, I had to let go, @times I get to remember and I wave it side. Now dat my little boy can smile for 9ja, he giggles too much, he makes me smile a lot and I thank God dat I didn't go for abortion, and also thank my sweet mother for her support during those hard times, may almighty God bless her. My husband is a changed person. I thank almighty God for finally giving me a son to call my own. Now I am a very happy woman and I love my son kamsi so much. Abeg make una no vex for my long epistle. God bless all sdk readers
DeleteI love Kamsssiiii tooo!!!!!
DeleteGod is faithful!
Jenny,you see my dear....life throws several challenges at us,but how you come out of it is the main ish!! You are a survivor dear!! I have turned to voltron today..waiting for any "cusser" here!! Gbam
This touched me.
DeleteJenny here's a blog-hug specially for you.
Delete@iphie dearie, thanks jare. God bless and ur baby girl, hope u didn't cry too much, pls take things easy, God us ur strength. Lady koikoi how bodi
DeleteBloglord u are a darling, thanks for d hug, got d hug dis morning. Kisses
DeleteWow. This made me cry. I'm proud of u.
DeleteOh! I so much cherish mothers though I'm not one yet and I pray to be soon. I love my mum so passionately and effortlessly. God bless all mums here.
ReplyDeletehmmmmmmm interesting topic! not married yet, let me wait for comment bikonu.
ReplyDeleteAm a learner so lemme hear from experienced mothers
ReplyDeleteIntresting write up...
ReplyDeleteAm yet to give birth ,so i don't really understand...
Yea I went through it. All because I had prepared my mind and self and even had DH pay the hospital bill for a vaginal birth and when it was time, I dilated from a 0 to 8cm in 4hrs and then it stopped. I continued to labor for another 12hrs and no improvement, then that urge to 'shit' came, it wasnt time to push cz I hadn't gotten to a 10 yet but I couldn't hold it, I continued pushing for another 2hrs. The Dr. Couldn't do a caesarian yet cz there was no reason to, the baby's heartbeat and vitals were super and I had so much strength ... Anyways when I saw my hubby in tears begging me to forget my 'deliver like the Hebrew woman' idea ... Lol., I went in. Of cuz in 10mins all was done. But when I saw my baby I wasn't overwhelmed ... Didn't feel like a big deal anymore. For the next 2weeks I felt like a failure cz I couldn't birth my baby vaginally. But DH was by my side, took time off work to talk to me, my in laws were fantastic too. My family too ... Its God and family that counts most in that period. And believe me it worked and I overcame. Just open up to ur hubby or mom or sister about how u feel. It pays to talk to someone about it.
ReplyDeleteI had my share of PND when I had my first child.
ReplyDeleteIt's so funny how folks just say pray pray pray. Yes my life depends on prayer but prayer without works is vain hence the doctors for treatment/delivery, the lawyer for your wahala,the counsellor for your ish them etc.
Stella it comes like a thief at odd hour. Slowly i began to lose my joy and felt irritated at anything even my little one's cry became like a bee buzz to my ears.
Nobody understood me. Do you know it makes one feel like just running away? Peeps call it baby blues but it's quite different and severe than that.
I took to the net and searched endlessly till I came across a name that best described my feeling then and funny enough no pregnancy classes I attended taught anything on PND.
I started talking to some friends over there and made use of the Talking Therapy. I became so open to hubby of my feelings and he never judged me but lovingly encouraged me each time that it'll be over. Thank God he was patient coz I was just talking g and talking. Couldn't talk to mio madre coz she'd feel sad. It was horrible but I did heal quickly
@Arianna,I can relate to the feeling of wanting to run away. That was me some few months back. I felt like running far far away from everything and everyone.
DeleteI was consumed with this deep feeling that I can't just explain it.
I had my own share of PND sometime around 7 weeks after I had this my last baby.
Hmmmm!
At some point, I just couldn't stand breastfeeding her. Strange right?
I can't explain the feeling, all I know is that I wasn't just happy. I was tired of everything. I felt trapped/caged/handicapped.
I felt I was carrying the world's burden all alone on my shoulder.
The anger in me then can choke one to death. I was fuming inside for no particular reason.
Every little thing annoyed me. I just wanted to be left alone in peace and quiet. My kids cries/noise then use to drive me crazzzzy.
I felt like giving them away. I just needed peace. Just peace, ordinary peace...
I hated seeing hubby looking all fresh, young and cute. I felt he had no right to look so handsome and fit while I battle to regain my figure. We should be in this together for Christ's sake!
I felt cheated.
No be small thing oh.
One day, hubby finished dressing up to go out and made the mistake of asking me how he looked. Instead of the usual compliment, he was shocked when I verbally attacked him calling him all sorts of names. I eventually broke down in tears. The poor guy was so taken aback and confused.
He kept asking what he did wrong, Hahahahaha!
I felt I was the one doing all the sacrificing while he is enjoying the fruits of my labour.
Another day I got so mad when he was innocently taking pictures with the kids.
See me shaking with rage that afternoon. I mean, I'm the one who had to go through pregnancy , then the excruciating labour pains and last minute C- section.
Then endless exclusive breastfeeding and sleepless nights.
Shebi na me and him f**k? Why am I the only one bearing the pains and discomforts, then when I'm done and the kids are settled and happy, he brings out his phone to take pictures with happy kids. My hard labour! My sweats!
Common!
God forgive me oh, I know I made life difficult for everyone in the house that period.
Couldn't help it, honestly.
They were all on their toes 24/7 because the slightest slip from anyone, I explode!
Funny enough, coming to this blog helped in relieving and calming me to an extent.
Thank God it didn't take hubby long to figure out that I was gradually slipping into PND tho I refused to acknowledge it at first.
He tried his best to make me happy.
He became extra nice and made everyone do same.
He got me gifts, took me shopping and took over more than half of my job concerning the kids (like bathing etc) so I can get enough rest.
Once I finish breastfeeding baby, he takes the baby away to another room so I can catch some sleep. He made me not to enter the kitchen for 2 weeks. My helps and my inlaw living with us took care of the kitchen,mine was just to tell them what to prepare.
Hubby also started coming home earlier than usual, he comes back as early as 3 pm that period and sometimes he skips work if he doesn't have any serious thing to do (he owns his own company so he can afford to do what he likes).
I got lots of calls from my parents especially mum. He told them.
Mum and I will spend hours gossiping,laughing and gisting on the phone. My mum keeps me up to date with all the things happening back home. She is my "home gist" vendor, hahahahahaha!
Thanks to God, within 3 weeks or so I was back to my normal self. Hubby still jokingly reminds me how I terrorised them.
The cure to PND is love, care, attention, understanding and encouragement from family and friends.
I have always heard about it but never believed I could be a victim. I even watched out for the signs when I had my 1st baby.
Omg!! Genny!!!!!
DeleteI hated seeing my husband happy infact...kikikikiki
I hated seeing him looking cool!! I hated him stepping out without me during weekends!!!
I hated taking pictures!! Half of my body was fair,the other part,dark!!! I became so withdrawn..
Oneday..i think my baby was having this unexplainable thing called Colic,lol...from morning till night she was cranky..i could not do anything...all she did was latch on to my breast..sucking for comfort!!
And I had a problem then,once my food lands and I hear her crying,i lose my appetite instantly!! So it was like she was dragging my food with me(enemy within)
I pray I don't experience that sadness this time around..esp the part of envying hubby!
Oh I forgot to add that the huge Ghana must go(4 or 5) my mom came with,i made her keep them at our inner veranda!! I told her not to come with plenty food stuffs..fish,stock fish..this woman packed the whole world(bless her)...that night my hubby was just looking at me like am mean and ungrateful....i was just not happy!
DeleteAfter welcoming her ooh...I looked at the plenty things coming out of the car one by one..i told her we don't like load here(buhahahaha)..na my mama born me..she agreed...my people...I cannot explain what happened to those things..but I know I chopped them..she sneaked everything in one after the other!!
I was looking for who to pounce on at every corner...lmao! #memories
hahhhahhhhahahaha@ ur second comment about ur mom...for a moment iphie I thought u were telling my story.
DeleteMy own PND no go contain ds blog, no need.
@iphie u cracked me up, na come still chop am finish, mothers will always understand
DeleteNa wa ooo @Genny baby and @Iphie dearie, oh dear you mums had it really bad am glad it's all in the past now. Enjoy your priceless gift for God.
DeleteMy own PND no go contain this blog sef, hmmmmm....... it was even worst cos my mum was in heaven. God bless her soul. Women are going thru a lot really.
DeleteLol at all the comments. This is so me, my baby is 3 months now. I had to snap myself out of it oh, as I cannot come and go and kill myself. What helped was constantly reminding my self that, it is only a phase that would pass.
DeleteI still fall into PND once in a while though.
God bless all mothers! And may He bless those waiting too. Amen
Never Ever Suffered from it....
ReplyDeleteHeard about it and was watching out for it,but it never showed up.
I experience this for a year after I have my babies. I had both babies in quick succession so the ppd from the first was not treated when I got pregnant for the next. I had all the symptoms listed above. My husband didn't understand even after my Mum warned him about it. After the 2 month mark even my mother lost patience with me thinking I was over doing things. I wanted to die and felt useless and sad. I spoke to my doctor but he trivialised it and said it will pass. At the time I had also just moved to a new city. No friends. No family. No help. Just me and the children cos hubby was at work most of the time. I felt lonely, unloved, overwhelmed and useless. I cried all the time and had huge mood swings. All I was told was to get my self together and stop being needy. Pls if you have this pls see a psychiatrist. There are drugs for it. To hell with stigma. Get help. I plan to see a doctor before I have my next baby to help me get through it. I would really love to do something to help women suffering from it. It is a pity that in this part of the world we'd rather let ppd mothers harm themselves and their babies than face stigma. I remember a woman drowned her 5 children in the bath tub due to untreated ppd. Get help! Ok bye
ReplyDeleteWhen hubbies understand this...it helps a great deal dear..
DeleteI guess mine was mild cos I didn't take drugs...
Sometimes hubby will take me for a ride or I would express for momsie and run out with him..he was super helpful..i pray he does not slack this time around because this times around I have another wee one that needs my attention too..
I had post partum depression after my first baby. It was a dark period for me. I will just be crying for no apparent reason.
ReplyDeleteI was confused because I had heard motherhood brings joy but it wasn't so in my case. I hated being alone and unfortunately we live abroad so no one to talk to when hubby goes to work.
I prayed to GOD about it.
My mum came to do omugwo and i felt better. In fact i did not know it was a medical condition until months later.
To get out of this, you need prayers, family and friends. Try not to be alone as much as you can afford it.
Talk to your doctor if it gets to the stage where you are having suicidal thoughts.
Some women have ended their lives and their babies like this...
This is a very sensitive topic for me because I suffered PD and because of the circumstances I am still receiving treatment for it. I had a "blest" while I was pregnancy with my Chagi. I was bedridden from the 4th month and had to go to the labour room on crutches due to Pelvic Girdle Pains (PGP). I had a really "blest" time I was in another country because of my Doctorate degree and my hubby had to return to Nigeria as he was unable to renew his visa. I gave birth to the cutest baby ever and could not even carry him because I could not walk i would just sit there and breastfeed and my sister and friends would do every other thing. I was able to walk after 5 months and I arrived Nigeria to see hubby and when it was time to return my baby was denied a visa(imagine). I had to leave him behind because of school but then my hell started.
ReplyDeleteThe only thing holding me together was my baby and he was now far away. My marriage was even having issues and my finances was bad the depression I tried had to fight during the ante natal stage came in full force. I could not even leave my house, i would stay in the dark and starved for days. i reduce from a size 12 to a size 6 within a twinkle of an eye. an to sum it up, i attempted suicide and then I packed up and returned to Nigeria since I felt my joy and source of life was here.
Alias coming back was worse, my marriage was hell and life became more unbearable, its been a year I returned and I have been on an antidepressant (prozac) since last year. Folks down here see depression as a white's man ailment so don't see a reason why i feel the way I feel. I found solace in God because my hubby made it even more difficult. I suffered panic attacks and fear was my worst enemy. I felt not useful because even my child was happy being with the grandma and didn't seem to miss me.
I sufffered more emotional and mental abuse in marriage hence the depression just would not go and to top it all up. I had to withdraw from my programme since I was not in a good shape and due to financial stress.
I am currently in Looking for a job with my previous MSC(s) qualifications and its not been easy so the depression lingers on.
I am however finding some comfort in my son who is just a darling and I have some wonderful friends who have proven to be closer than my brothers and sisters who have been there for me.
i am still on prozac and do get really bad some times. but mine is a PD that was not properly managed due to lack of family support that has lingered on due to the surrounding circumstance. I do believe once I get a Job it will reduce my worries.
i am yet to overcome the trauma of being pregnant cos I still have pains in my pelvic and really scared of going through that experience again( but I really want to hold a baby sha)
Support from anyone is fine but it is paramount that husbands become the source of primary support for mothers suffering from PD.
May God heal and perfect all that concerns you speedily. I feel you
DeleteWow! God will heal you my dear...you will recover everything you lost just like Job in the bible!! remain blessed...
DeleteInfact ehnn aunty Stels, thank you for this topic. Ignorance kills faster than aids, Ebola and all the evil sickness put together. I went through this postnatal ish, never knew there was name for it. I was lucky enough because my mum and good hearted frds where all there for me. So much love and words of encouragement frm them. They made me feel special in all ways. My wonderful hubby didn't noticed his wife was going thru pains. Pls husbands pay attention to your wives. Especially in a time as important has that!
ReplyDeleteMine was terrible! My husband who did not have a job at the time suddenly seemed unavailable from morning till after 10pm everyday! I got no help or support from him at all!
ReplyDeleteI even thought of killing my baby and then killing myself!
No one should be alone after giving birth, its not healthy!
a.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said...
ReplyDelete.
To be a woman aint easy thats why i respect women whether big or small.....
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***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***
Hello Stella and my fellow BVs'. This Post natal depression is very real. i experienced it after the birth of my first child and even after the twins.
ReplyDeleteIt's a terrible condition, i just find myself crying for no just cause, i feel like the world is untop of my head, even when am supposed to be the happiest person at that moment. Am withdrawn and dont even want to talk to or see anyone.But
having lots of people around helps a great deal, make sure you never find yourself sitting alone, there must always be someone with you bringing out gist from no gist. Lol.
I didnt take medication, i got better grip of myself after couple of weeks.
I so suffered from PND ehn.....Na just God help me ooo.The fatigue in those initial 2weeks was something else,lack of rest,first time motherhood anxiety,partner not always available (cos he had many things doing then) our cultural gibberish of receiving visitors and 1million courtesy calls when u suppose dey rest.itz commonly found amongst pple that had vaginal delivery as I have come to observe.The psychological and physical trauma of childbearing coypled with incessant night wakings esp in the case of exclusive breast feeding warrants adequate rest,good nutrition which one does not readily get.it was until about 6weeks after childbirth before I started enjoying myself.i swear I wan die!Alot of pple need to be educated about this condition especially partners of new mothers so they don't succumb to all these old women talk of "it is normal,she has to get used to it" utter nonsense! I really felt alone during that period and am sure an occasional hug would have gone a long way in helping.I had to take solace in staring at my baby and reminding myself that "it's worth it".That's why I plan having my baby next baby through C.section (by His grace).At least,nobody would expect me to be active that first week because the wound go still dey heal and movements should be limited.Hence, an adequate 1 week sleep!#likita#
ReplyDeleteMy dear,so na because u wan rest u wan do CS?,hmmmn...God be with u.
DeleteEven with a vaginal delivery,u can rest...anyone that comes visiting should be told u are asleep, simple!
Birth through CS doesnt help with PND. I had my 3 babies through CS and I can confirm too you that I suffered seriously from PND...... i want to believe that its even worse with CS new mom.....each time it started just 3 days after birth....I felt like my head wanted to burst. ..to compound the issue...I had extra crying babies........they are so restless..each time I hear cry I burst into cry too. I just felt the baby is telling me that I need to do more even the effort I was putting was such a big task because of the wound......infact with my last baby I started having nightmare while still in the hospital...I remember asking a nurse that I need to leave the hospital fast because I noticed a pyton under my bed.. and I feel scared to death...the nurse asked whether I meant python or plastic....I insisted python. Lol.....The doctor was called in for me....while they were still waiting for yhe doctor to come....I attempted bribing the nurse to let me go before the doctor came... anyway; they understood my plight and just kept me with stule till the doctor came and administer drug on me...I slept off.. when I woke up..I remembered all what happened but it felt like I was in a dream...I never believed I did those stuffs in real life
DeleteMy sister... CS cant stop PND.....you will even feel worse seeing other women giving birth in few hours and forgetting all their pains while you continue to nurse pain from wound even weeks after birth.
@Anon 4:09...true talk, CS incision site pain no be here o...simple things like getting up from bed and using toilet go come be JAMB.May all mothers live to enjoy the fruits of their labour.
DeleteMay God help us women, not easy being a woman.
ReplyDeleteHmmmmm stella . I dont think it takes 6 to 8 weeks like the analysis says. Ive seen someone snap some says after giving birth to her baby and wanted to drown the baby under the tap in the hospital, she was bathing a new born baby with cold water under the tap until the docs intervened and gave her a dose of something to sleep, she was treated like a psychiatric case, all because the baby had some medical issues and stayed in the hospital longer than necessary. Truth is when women give birth its an emotionally traumatising time for them. I remember one day i sat up in bed with my first son at night and just kept crying cos the boy wouldnt sleep and i had to go to work the next day and everyone had slept and left me alone. Now i surround myself with maids, friends, sisters, inlaws and everyone i know can help cos i know what i went thrj
ReplyDeleteI suffered PND too but it started because I didn't get the birth I wanted...after a smooth, uncomplicated pregnancy,I had to go through an emergency csection and had to spend a week in the hospital. I was able to overcome it cos my mum was with me, she really encouraged me and I was able to rest more cos she did the house chores and helped in taking care of my lbaby.
ReplyDeleteNew moms should always have help after delivery,pregnant women should also be educated about PND so that they can recognise the signs...taking care of a newborn ain't easy. PND is very real.
ReplyDeleteDis depression is so so real!!!!!!! I suffered from it in my first baby. In fact am not sure i have overcome dis depression. As first time mum. I wasn't prepared fr d whole sleepless nite, d whole stress. I now have my second baby but I noticed d depression was much more with my first baby. I got tired of busing her, d whole washing of cloths every day, no help , no sleep at nite, hubby didnt help much cos he's not so good with carrying newborns. I felt so sad, I was surprised CIA I heard u will be filled with joy
ReplyDeleteI so experienced dis. Like 2 weeks after birth. Feel like killing myself. Feel like wow am not ready to be a mummy, hate ur own child
ReplyDeleteMay God help moms. It's real my Stella . Den my baby would be crying and I will just ignore him. I got tired for real. Wished I was still single. I now have 3 babies now, tnk God
ReplyDeleteI had d experience too wen I gave birth to my baby in d u.s. I was told in d hospital Dat I will Ve baby blue but dint understand till I came home. I was a first time mum too. I got angry at any little thing. Dint know how to bath my baby nd d lady I was staying wit dint want to help me out. Even after delivery d lady would want me to go to d kitchen and cook. I had to take care of my baby, was her clothes, bath d children I was staying wit nd oda things i was doing without d help of dis lady. My baby had serious collic pain and sometimes she would cry out loud nd refused to suck. I couldn't handle it I called my husband in Nigeria and I started crying, he encouraged me and after Dat I always call him weneva I'm depressed nd it was relieve to me.
ReplyDeleteWomen we go through alot. I went through the same and it was hell. I was going through issues with my in laws and hubby was Caving IN With He's Mother. I was fustrated, baby cried I cried. It went on for almost a year. I had to make a conscious effort never to neglect my daughter cause I was her only help. It was tough.
ReplyDeleteWe need love, we need help. We need our family. We need our loved ones reassurance that it will be fine. For me just my hubby taking my daughter for an hour helped me relax even if I didn't sleep. I Thank God that my mum came to help after 2 months of having the baby. Thank God for my sisters that took time off work to help. This stigma of you are a mother should stop. Childbirth is the hardest thing anyone can go through. Some people die when giving birth. GOD help us mothers and women.
Hmmm. I have had this for 2yrs now and it was made worse cos my marriage broke down thanks to my in law. It is the hardest thing anybody can go through. I have cried everyday since I gave birth and I feel worthless . It feels like God hates me and his just left me alone.
ReplyDeleteDear, God did not leave you. Everything will work out for the best.
DeleteAll I can say is JEEEEEEEZ!!! This is scary mehn! God pls help me when the time comes and give my hubby all the wisdom he needs!
ReplyDeleteGod Bless my Mother for me.
@ anonymous 12: 38pm, I sympathize with you. I want to make you aware that you are not sufferring from PND anymore, you have a low serotonin level, hence the antidepressant Prozac , you were been given, I can attest to symptoms, panic attacks and suicidal thoughts, I have a close friend who has 3 kids and suffers from depression just because unlike people with normal serotonin level , they are able to be happy naturally, but people with low serotonin level, what is suppose to make them happy naturally, requires more effort, I'll recommend that you see a neurologist and this condition is usually inherited, so pls find out if any family member experiences or experienced how you feel panic attacks and all.
ReplyDelete@ anonymous 12: 38pm, I sympathize with you. I want to make you aware that you are not sufferring from PND anymore, you have a low serotonin level, hence the antidepressant Prozac , you were been given, I can attest to symptoms, panic attacks and suicidal thoughts, I have a close friend who has 3 kids and suffers from depression just because unlike people with normal serotonin level , they are able to be happy naturally, but people with low serotonin level, what is suppose to make them happy naturally, requires more effort, I'll recommend that you see a neurologist and this condition is usually inherited, so pls find out if any family member experiences or experienced how you feel panic attacks and all.
ReplyDeleteStella thanks for this topic, am a single mom n also an orphan, dnt knw if I shld call mine PND or frustration cos my son is 11 yrs old yet I dnt want to see him. Anything he does annoys me. Dnt knw if its bcos no man is asking for my hand in marriage, somebody shld pls help me out. Tnx
ReplyDeleteLove yourself and love your son. God will send you your own husband.
DeleteGet closer to God, get a Bible believing Church, study ur Bible and pray more, u would be fine
DeleteYour son is 11 for crying out loud. He needs his mum. Get over for self n be his mum. Yours isn't PND, it's selfishness. You think your son is blocking your shine and preventing men from seeing you. Like he begged to come to this world. Were u not the one that had the see? This is the hard truth. You are a selfish mum n u need to get over yourself n be a mom to your son or God will send someone else to do the job for you and he won't regard u as his mum anymore. Goodluck
DeleteStaco!! let somebody wake my sleeping ass up. So na mamas full this blog? am surprise ohhh!!!! anyways sha. I had my own PND when I had a "still birth." I couldn't enter my room and hubby was at work. I thought it was because i lost the baby. Both hubby and I never knew what I was going through. Three days after birth, I will leave the house when hubby goes to work, and return the same time with him, I was behaving like a mad women couple with the fact that I lost the baby.I couldn't share my experience to anybody because I don't want them to attribute it to something else because am very fair in complexion, they might start saying ogbanje or whatever.So I conceal my experience until it was over. When I had my baby boy through CS, I had another feeling, I felt hubby wasn't treating me well, and I would nag at a slightest provocation. But thank God today, for I can't wait to lecture my daughter when the time comes
ReplyDeleteReading through the experiences, and I can't stop praising God.
ReplyDeleteMy heart reaches out to all who've experienced such, and those still experiencing it, the healing stream of God will flow through you all in Jesus's name.
Despite a terrifying delivery, I must confess I enjoyed enough care from my mom; dad & sweet friends. #Pamperingoflife!
Hubby's part, no be here at all!