Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narratives.

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Thursday, May 07, 2015

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narratives.

Love Shouldnt hurt!!!








NARRATIVE NUMBER ONE
WHEN SIDE CHICK STEPS IN THE WIFE SUFFERS..


hello madam good day to you, my name is Yinka.. i married the most amazing man and God blessed us with wonderful children, we did not have much but the little we have we are contented with it..  Stella before i married my husband he worships the ground i walk on, but once i got pregnant with our first child i noticed some different attitude, being a free spirited woman i didnt suspect anything, firstly he asked me to stop working, i thought it was a bad idea but he convinced me and told me he is equal to the task, so i agreed.. 

After my baby ,i told him i wanted to go back and work that was when i saw the other side of the man i married he beat me up that day and called me ungrateful .. after that time if anything happens and i tried to make him see reasons with me he bluntly refuses.. i called my family and told them all that was happening, i informed his family also and they told me to be patient that things will get better... i became idle and DH wants it like that.. 

Fast forward to last 2 months, i noticed he had been making some shaddy calls, if the caller calls him, he runs out of the room, into the bathroom, or anywhere away from me, i didnt want to ask him because i did not want him to beat me up.. it continued like that for a whole week before i confronted him and the slap i received that day made me land in the hospital ,my phone flew outta my hand and smashed.. i came back thinking my husband will be remorseful, but no.. he  even stopped talking to me and stopped giving us money to feed on.. the little money i saved i exhausted it on me and my children, when i could not continue in hunger i packed my bag and went to an uncle's place and that's where i have been staying with my kids.. 

Stella the problem i have now is should i go back and beg him and continue? or should i just ignore him and move on.. Please this is killing me .. i need advice from matured minds..  please help post for advice.. Thank you.



Awwww,i am so sorry you are going through this,if your story is accurate then it is a pity you married such a he-beast!
You want to go and beg him?what is your crime?There is a difference between being humble and being stupid.If you go and beg and move back in,will it change anything?
Until he is done with what he is doing,there might be no space for you.
please this is the time to go and look for a job,get your own place and make yourself happy.abi you want to be beaten to death?shine your eyes


............................................................................................................



NARRATIVE NUMBER TWO
REFUSING TO LEAVE WHEN THE HAND WRITING ON THE WALL STARES AT YOU.

Dear Stella... I trust you're doing great and the family is well too. I have been procrastinating this mail since last year cuz I ddnt want the person(my sister), to get mad but I can't take it anymore cuz she needs advice. Ok, we all know domestic violence is not something that started today in most homes and thank God Africans are more aware and seek help. 

My older sister has been married for four and the half years and God blessed them with two beautiful girls. Stella if you see my sister, you wont believe she has two kids and men still make passes at her. She's married to a beast of a man, as I type this i am in pain cuz my sister doesn't deserve this. 

He hits her, abuses her, calls her all kinds of names you can think of. Doesn't give her money for herself and the kids and she fends for them from her little salary,she can't even save or pay tithes. If you see her, you wont know she's suffering cuz she doesn't like side talks. I am the only one she confides in and recently a gist came about that the husband impregnated another girl, he has asked my sister to leave and also packed her things. 


Locked their room so she can't go in, eavesdrops on her, infact the list is endless. Stella, I've asked my sis to come back home before he kills her but I know her problem is what people will say. I don't want anything to happen to her, please you people should help us here cuz she won't want this to become something that'll cause a family meeting. She is very tired and wants out(she told me so) but her concern is the two girls(he even denied the last girl is his). 

She is an ardent reader of your blog and I want her to see this even if she gets mad at me,I am sure it will help her.





So with all the domestic violence cases going on now someone will still be making excuses for staying with a violent person?Why does he suspect the last kid is not his?Does your sister sleep around?
Is that why he is being violent to her?
So your sister is a blog member,sees all the domestic violence cases brought here and of those that have been maimed and have died and she is still refusing to leave?He has asked her to go and she refuses?Then maybe he isnt such a monster or beast afterall and perhaps she wants to wait till he kills her and then we will be convinced that he was actually a beast but by then it would be TOO LATE.
LOVE SHOULDNT HURT YOU!!

pic from thesparkng.com







170 comments:


  1. Stells dropping it like it's hot!

    #Space-Booked

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. *sighs* I'm so scared of getting married, I've got marriage phobia

      Delete
    2. @poster1 : don't go back 2 ur Horseband, stay with your uncle if is convenient for him and start working or do something no matter how small.
      If you beg him,dat means u will continue begging and he will take the advantage of it n do more harm 2 u.
      I pray God restores your home.
      @poster2 : I pity your sister.
      Her eyes never clear,i pray dat man don't get 2 kill her b4 she leaves.
      NB: where do all this. Women met this. Beast??????????
      Is there any happy home at all?

      Delete
    3. Please Violence comes in many forms - Verbal and physical abuse....women are fond of the former too...pls let's have a balanced perspective...physical abuse can lead to Murder but it starts from Anger Then Verbal Abuse then physical abuse and ultimately, homicide

      Delete
    4. Poster one and two.... No body deserves to b treated dat way.... Say no to domestic violence
      poster one....... Just let him b for sometime and see if he will change his mind... Dont go begging for now

      Poster two.... Plz tel ur sis to get out of dat marriage b4 he will kill her... Abusive men don't change at all except God intervenes.... Plz she shud go back home and forget wat people will say cuz is dat same people dat will still ask y she not leave if he does something serus to her

      Delete
    5. Poster 1, you better look for a job and to be honest with you, don't beg him or go back. He'll not change at all. When you start living without him and you're successful, the annoying man will now come and start begging you. God will punish all these men that treat the mother of their children like this, especially if the woman is very nice and humble.


      Poster 2, In as much as I believe in the institution of marriage and dont support divorce, I will strongly advice any woman that is being abused to leave the marriage before we start hearing stories that touch the heart.

      A man that cannot provide for his family is worse than an infidel. Please leave.
      Abeg leave jor.









      @Mosi_Tash_Jazzy

      Delete
    6. Poster 1: marriage is over except you want them to write it on a wall in your language for you. Go and beg for what? Abeg move on fend for yourself and your kids don't make yourself totally dependent on anyone.

      Poster 2: tell your sister when she dies there we go gist her matter here.

      Low self esteem women na una sabi

      Delete
    7. @ bae,i dey feel u.always the first commenter.@ poster 1and 2,u guys shouldn't let dem kill u n leave ya kids in d hands of another woman.

      Delete
    8. Well, I think we should go back to the roots of these issues. How did they meet? Who proposed to who? Did he want to marry you to start with? Or you thought these men were in love with you.
      Ladies these days should see the handwriting on the wall. Guys are pressured by the society to marry, so it's a wise decision to know exactly why you're marrying him.
      I don't believe in by people changing, that's rubbish. These dudes were cheats/ lady beaters from the word go! They didn't change.

      Best wishes, love shouldn't hurt.


      *** mynameisSkelewu

      Delete
    9. God bless you anonymous 04:54 women will be forming victims as if they were handed or even sold to the men. While dating you see most sides of a man yet they go in believing they can manage him like that and that God will change him

      Delete
  2. Replies
    1. Ok. Poster 1 and 2, RUN. Some women dey follow cause wetin dey make men beat them sha. But there's NO excuse for domestic violence or cheating in marriage. You both made vows. Once your life,peace and sanity is on the line,Please its time to pack your bags and RUN.

      Delete
  3. To the two posters please let them move on with their life, pack out nd face ur life. Get a job and improve on urself. You don't deserve to be hurt or cry ova useless people. Pls and pls to be alive is better than being dead.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This is what happens when you marry a man 10yrs older than you. He would not want you as a partner but an object. To control, manipulates and abuse as he pleases

      Delete
  4. Poster 1,
    Why should you go back and beg him if your hands are clean or is there something you are not telling us??...


    Poster 2,
    No she should stay....maybe she will leave when the idiot of a man sends her to an early grave...
    Mtcheeeewww...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And the man is not making any effort to come beg u or appeal to u to return home...so why bother? He clearly is done with the marriage if by now he hasn't come to plead... I tire biko

      Delete
  5. Poster one and two are both in an abusive relationship.
    Poster two: you are concerned about what people will say, like seriously in this day and time!!
    I think ur happiness isn't paramount
    But marriage is paramount to you.

    I don't understand why ladies refuse to work because their husband said so
    Even if my husband is dangote or bill gate, I'll still work, it isn't about money .

    I tire for some married women, I tire seriously.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you! Some ladies really leave me speechless, domestic violence is never ok. No justification, please leave the situation.

      Delete
  6. Narratives 1 & 2.
    Please just walk out of the marriage, most women deserve better and I'll never support violence in marriage. If the ladies in this narratives love their lives, Please they should walk away.

    Messi does things nobody else can do, says Iniesta

    Chelsea await Icardi decision

    Guardiola: Bayern were in control... then Messi showed his class

    ReplyDelete
  7. Poster 1: Mostly is Anambra men that will tell their wives not to work. I have a friend that the husband told not to work she agreed because love was sweet. Now na cry. please i need job ooo. the suffer no be small.
    Your husband is a beast. You dont need to beg him. Please raise your head up and get work to do. Your husband is supposed to beg. I wonder what happens to love you till death do us part. foolish men everywhere.

    Narrator 2: your sister be like some blog visitors here that must stay with a beast because they want to bear MRS.
    Drag your sister by the head to leave that marraige before una post her obituary.

    it is a pity what women go through in marraiges. Me dey wait for my fiance to try nonsense with me. Evenself na me they show him pepper too.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Half the time you spew wisdom inspired "trash" ...keep calm and grow up!

      Delete
  8. Replies
    1. My mother suffered domestic violence frm my father n bin little we would beg my dad to stop n as I grew up I said No Way Will I allow any man raise his hand to hit mii for y rather den find myself in dat situation ill stick to bin single...so at both poster ill say RUN RUN RUN pick ur life frm the scratch it wont b easy knw dat ohh but its bter dan death..goodluck

      Delete
  9. Poster 1: a woman leaves her home, clings to a man and they become man and wife.If uv started noticing these things in him,1) ur husband mightv involved himself in something that only God may scatter.Remember man wey dey him own sidechic no dey pounce on am.So he brot forth his hand and...now u have no reason going to beg, you did not offend him except if you have ur faults here too.Get a job, toughen up, be truthful to yourself.If you mean anything to him let him come find you.If not just let it go.

    Poster 2: What will people say when ur sis is dead? Oh! Y did she let him beat her to death could she not speak up? It's a different thing when a man does it and is remorseful and tries hard never to repeat it, than when it's a habit.Im sure from here you know what to do.Furthermore, abt the one that is pregnant for him ensure u do not fight it.Let him even marry her join and he will see that fling(affair) and marriage are not the same thing.N for her that married slept with n got pregnant for someone's husband, she will also learn that the grass is never greener on the other side.

    ReplyDelete
  10. POSTER 1 - sorry you hear. some men are insatiable beast...Take it to the Lord in prayer (the master key).

    POSTER 2 - As strange as it may seem, some ladies are obsessed with men that abuse them. it's called Alpha Fever (The only man worth having is the kind of man that can beat the snot out of any other man around. She rewards her "Alpha Male" with a clean house, hot sex, warm food, and cold beer). SAD BUT TRUE

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. True! Most people in dysfunctional relationships or from dysfunctional homes have adapted to the drama and violence that comes with. I knew a girl back in Uni who only liked guys who beat her. She said it kept her in check. She even refused marrying a guy who was head over heels in love with her because he wasn't 'man enough' for her, because he refused to hit her any time they quarrel.

      Delete
  11. Poster 1 Dont beg him. Go out there and look for something to do and establish yourself.

    Poster 2 are u a learner? Honestly you ve not learnt anything from this blog. You are scared of what people will say if you leave, have you asked yourself what they will say when you re killed? Suit yourself

    ReplyDelete
  12. You see what have been saying???
    Smh..
    So many evil marriages out there...
    Na by force to marry ni??
    Both of you should find your square roots abeg..

    Until women starts thinking like men..all these problems go drop to zero level.....


    Am so angry right now
    Smtcheeeeerwwww

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. olori western union7 May 2015 at 21:04

      Am tired of advising them sef
      Am beginning to sound like a broken record
      She's a bv, and hears cases of domestic violence we talk about often and she still wanna stay?
      Dey do wetin if I may ask? Smhh!!!


      The other one won go beg the ozuor wey she call husband na wa ooo

      If there's any statement I hate so much, its "what will people say"
      Whatever people like, they can so freaking say.
      Your happiness and peace of mind matters more than whatever it is they wanna say

      But as usual una go hear? Lailai.

      Delete
  13. Stella I don't blame side chicks completely. Our men are not loyal. They are dogs in human form, by the time I deal with my own. He'll know that being a good wife is not a sin. Single girls make una too dey shine una eyes, these men are going to give you badluck fine they'll give you money but what about your conscience.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Me my heart don become stone and have been thinking like a man since since oooo....
    So Incase any gbege like dis...i bounce!!


    No time to waste biko!!!

    Nonsense men everywhere!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Okija wife you try too hard.

      Delete
    2. Nwanyi true talk! Me sef don harden. My boyfriend is having it hot. He knows I aaint got time 4 shit! My legs are always available. Onwero onye m na-ario biko. Women wisen up and toughen up. My cousin rejected a proposal from a boyfriend on grounds that she must be employed b4 marriage... long story the guy true color show na im my cousin call me say na this rubbish she 4 see 4 marriage? She got a job now with the feds. The serial cheater don bounce

      Delete
    3. Oloriburuku mysterious omo oshi....u are always welcome bambiala pikin!!!

      Smtcheeeeerwwww

      Delete
    4. Truth be say u soft too... if happen to u. U go cry full everwhere. Forget all this gra gra wey u dey do

      Delete
    5. Anonymous forget oh...my heart is always guided!!!

      Delete
  15. Poster1.if your hubby should hit you again,call your brothers or any other guys to beat him up in your present.that alone will teach him a lesson. Poster2.wow,what kind of hubby did you marry.it is well

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. olori western union7 May 2015 at 21:15

      As in ehnnn madam you no get brothers?
      If you don't have any send thugs to do it for you
      Nice one Efe

      Am the only girl, I have four brothers but I won't even want them to do something like these for me if I were in your shoes (God forbid) because they might kill the person in anger
      Thugs will do it better.

      Delete
  16. Ater whoring around y'all will send in nonsense chronicles. *longest hiss*

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You that is still whoring around

      Delete
    2. Hian! Anon 15:16 & 18:09, make una open una yansh na. Hehehehe see beef

      Delete
  17. Poster 1 pls dnt go back (u r very wise for leaving), you made the right decision. Look for job and train ur kids.. dnt forget prayin for ur husband if u stil love him
    Poster 2 since u don't wan to go to ur fathers house cos of wat people would say, I gues the people won't say anythg when he finally kill you(God Forbid).. abeg borow small sense to rent an apartment for yourself n ur kids(since you are a worker)..

    ReplyDelete
  18. Poster 1 pls dnt go back (u r very wise for leaving), you made the right decision. Look for job and train ur kids.. dnt forget prayin for ur husband if u stil love him
    Poster 2 since u don't wan to go to ur fathers house cos of wat people would say, I gues the people won't say anythg when he finally kill you(God Forbid).. abeg borow small sense to rent an apartment for yourself n ur kids(since you are a worker)..

    ReplyDelete
  19. Hmm
    FIX IT JESUS!
    Poster one..you don't need to go and beg him..that's like going back to pay homage to the devil..he will continue to beat and harras you..right now you need all the peace you can get..please,,find God,find yourself..dust your certificate..and go back to work..earn and take care of your kids..your husband will be somewia waiting for you to run back to him.. When he finds out you are doing better he will come crawling..

    Poster 2: your sisters story..I don't know..
    Are you the reason y she is in the marriage is because of what people will say??..is there something she is not telling you??
    No matter what ..I don't support domestic violence.. If your sister is clean..she should move out of that house..before something bad happens to her..


    SAY NO TO DOMESTIC VIOLENCE!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fix gini??? Taaaaaa!!!
      Na by force to dey husband house??? Smh...

      Make Una dey enjoy Una bad marriages dey gooo, na Una sabi

      Delete
    2. Okija whatever..what's the taa for??..did u ever read wia I told them to stay put..no dey taa that ur taa for my post abeg

      Delete
  20. OMG!
    Move ahead ladies,
    Marriage is not a do or die affair


    ********LONG LIVE SDK & SDKERS*********

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Gbam Gbam!!! Thank you oooo....
      These days women making marriages looks like their oxygen and thats why men continue to do rubbish!!!


      Smtcheeeeerwwww

      Delete
  21. Ooh no,not again....realy scared of marrying,is this wht it's all about???cant we just hear good positive stories??if husband no beat wife,wife go stab husband,Enough alredy.cant deal.

    May God settle ur homes.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Shebi God give u sense??? Apply dat sense when getting married!!!
      Should incase anything happens, u are good to go...

      Honestly we don't wish for these things to happen...but it sure does happen...

      Please be fully loaded ND prepared when getting married...not only monetary wise ooo, sha look well ND make sure u are not at the loosing end!!!

      Delete
    2. If tthe good stories about some marriages pour in, some BVS will still scream LIAR, DREAMER.
      So, What's the point?
      Some marriages are beautiful you know...
      Not that the couple don't have their misunderstanding but the way and manner at which maturity comes to play and issues are trashed before the light of a new day just works wonders.
      Marriage is all about #maturity #understanding #compromise #love #commitment #having the interest of your spouse at heart 247.

      Delete
    3. olori western union7 May 2015 at 21:30

      Bloggy you don get am
      They complain of the chronicles, but if they hear the good side of marriage, na the same people go scream, she's lying, she's showing off, bla!!! Bla!!! Bla!!!
      Make una enjoy the chronicle like that abeg, and if because of that you don't wanna get married, na your cup of kunu be that oooo
      In fact e even good sef, make men reach people wey won marry.

      Delete
  22. some men are beast o wtf is wrong with them has beating of wife become a trend for them

    I won't beat my wife so help me GOD




    #GODWIN

    ReplyDelete
  23. People sure go through stuffs in the name of marriage.

    Please visit my blog
    Www.trendwithgloria.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  24. One sided stories. What did you people do that made them turn against you. Even though they are men they also have conscience and can't just wake up one day and decide to be beasts. If you want honest advice then tell the complete story including your faults and flaws

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No matter what they did, nobody deserves to be beaten. Opinion like yours is part of the reason poster 2 is afraid to leave.

      Delete
    2. You must be single

      Delete
    3. My dear, dyu have sense??? Must u find a way to blame d women??? Haven't u see faultless women suffering from dv??? Pls if u don't have anything tangible to say, move to d next post.

      Delete
    4. Spoken like a Naija woman. You are so groomed to accept beating that you think someone being abused is due to the fault of the abused.

      Delete
    5. Eka Joy and Okija Wife have something in common. Lolzz *side eyes**

      Delete
  25. Poster 1: d first mistake u made is to stop ur work simply cos he asked u too and u agreed. For what kwanu? There is a fine line between being loyal and being stupid. Your husband don't worth d trouble abeg. Don't go and kill urself becos u married one man. Make I go back go read narrator 2 story.

    ReplyDelete
  26. To both posters, your stories are not complete. You both are not angels even if your men are demons. I am not in support of violence same way I hate lies.

    ReplyDelete
  27. hahahaha


    Domestic violence and its one-sided stories sef.


    It is hard to believe that a man will start beating a pious woman for nothing. I always like to hear both sides joh.



    But if i heard Mamie, General's wife and the rest of these jobless women are being beaten up, then i will drink to it...
    including my favourites: Lady Igo and Ronalda... lets see how they will write long epistles on it...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You bitterness will soon kill you. How dear you wish evil on innocent women. I am sure you are possessed, God heal your wicked soul.

      Delete
    2. You are just stupid. Abeg shift jare.

      Delete
    3. So is a man her father that he should be beating her. You are a coward if you best your wife PERIOF2

      Delete
    4. Mr man,forget it,some men are violent even to d most pious and timid women,cos they are naturally violent!they will beat u for talking and not talking at d same time!why am I even explaining to u?i shouldn't be bothered cos u are obviously one of those violent men..mtceew!repent sha cos God is watching u!

      Delete
  28. Both Posters points directly to Same thing "Domestic violence".
    God! Why are some Men beasts in human form
    *sigh

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Whatever the case am not scared o i will marry my husband will love me more n more by the day. Please someone that is in a happy marriage post your story for us, am tired of husband beating their wives.

      Delete
  29. Narrative 1... Please let both families meet and conclude. Whatever the outcome of the meeting, please get something doing ASAP so that at least you will get your mind of thinking too much.
    Narrative 2.. For the sake of your children please move out before this weekend! I don't care if you want to die by beating but for your children please move back with your family! You won't be the first nor the last to go back to her parents!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Our parents are the problem. They teach us that u can't run back home when the chips are down. That once married, you re on your own. Smh. It shouldn't be so. My brother doesn't have a permanent room in my house but I do. Daddy says its cos he expects my brother to be ok and knows I'll be too but if push come to shove, my brother can sleep on the couch. I cried the day he said it. Not cos I wanna be there forever but knowing I am part of my parents plan, warts n all, gives you one kinda confidence that no man can ignore.

      My husband ll know I have backup, he will think twice before being stupid

      Delete
    2. Awww @ Anon 18:25
      Your dad and mine must be twins.

      Everyone who attended my marriage ceremony won't forget in a hurry how my sweet daddy refused to hand me over to my husband's people till he made him and his family promise they will treat me right always.
      He made hubby repeat 3 times that he will never lay his hands on me.
      He insisted the eldest man in his family vouches for hubby.
      It was funny that day but dad way dead serious.
      I love my daddy!

      Them never born that man wey go hit me or any of my sisters.
      I trust my dad...
      I know what he'll do to such a man....

      Delete
    3. Bia anon 18:25 are u my sister? My aunts still have rooms in my grand father's house. My dad learnt from his own father God rest their souls. I always remember what my dad used to say to my brother any time he fights with any of us girls. Sadly my mum's mentally is the opposite.

      Delete
  30. N1, u should stay where u are an look for a job and train ur children. One thing I learnt in life is if a guy av a side chick dt he is enjoying, dia is nothing u can do to change his mind at dt time bc he is living in a fantasy likewise gals. De only come back to dia senses if dt fantasy is broken, maybe d lady or guy in question breaks dia heart, den dts when de will remember de av a loving wife somewhere and de will come back to beg. So dear take care of ur children, n when his fantasy breaks and he comes back den give him d 10 commandment, dts if u decide to listen to him at all. But make sure u told us d whole story bc I also know dt men change towards dia wife if de find infidelity in her, or if her xter or attitude changes. Goodluck. N2, tell ur sister to run bc it's obvious d love is lost already b4 he kills her, but from ur story, it's like ur sister is not loyal, maybe d man caught her cheating or heard about it dts y he is saying dt d second child might not be his. Talk to ur sister, let her tell u d whole truth bc no matter how a man is bad, he can't just turn against a woman he married for love without a strong reason except if he is under a spell, jazz or influence. Goodluck too.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. She should stay???? Oh really???

      Na WA oooo...orisirisi dey happen...
      Una dey try ooooo....
      Una wan die for marriage abi as na una oxygen to live...Smtcheeeeerwwww


      Get out fast woman that man is a destiny killer!!!

      Delete
    2. Chidinma I love your comments but my dear some men are not meant to be married,mentally they never prepared for marriage,they just marry because it is the norm,along the line their real self which is not ready for marital obligations will rear its head and they start to misbehave, some evil men still want to hang out with boys and come
      home by 12midnight,they still want to womanise and when the
      woman at home revolts against such behaviour, there is bound to be
      problems. Many girls just fall in lust and marry and some marry due
      to pressure or material things but very few take the time to
      investigate this men,watch them well,observe how they treat others
      and how they treat their ex,if a man is too harsh to a nice ex my dear
      watch that man closely,be very careful with a man who loves sex
      too much or is too conscious of how a woman's breast,hip etc shld
      look,take note of how a man treats people around him before you marry him, and most importantly girls should marry Godly men not all these so called born again who believes in paying tithes more
      than keeping the 10 commandements,but many girls don't care they
      just want to marry and in the end they will get fed up.
      Chidinma it is possible for people to hate you for no reason,that is the world we live in so we should be careful who will marry,I read a lot of comments here and I can tell you many of these girls are not even godly themselves

      Delete
  31. God created man and rested. Since God made woman nobody don rest. Narrative 2: ur sister is not being honest with u. All dis case of domestic violence everyday. Maybe d man is bringing out d best in ur sister via d beating.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. "Maybe the man is bringing out the best in your sister via d beating"
      Are you ok? Like are you really ok?

      Delete
    2. @bloglord, next time be sensitive enuf to know that u don't just read a comment to reply, u read to understand before replying. Or beta still if u don't understand, ask and I will explain what I typed. Idiat!

      Delete
    3. Do ppl still think like this? No wonder. See ya name sef....Isis!

      Delete
    4. @S baby, I pardon u for ur stupidity. Next time skip my comment else u will be getting it hot from me on dis blog. Anu ohia nwuru anwu. If u really know d meaning of my name, u will remain loyal. That reminds me, does d S in ur name stand for Stupid? Just asking.

      Delete
    5. Olori na bloglord be idiat?????

      Hehehehehehehheheeh......make I Pam first!!!

      Delete
    6. Olori buffoon! Ozuor! Idiot!

      Delete
  32. Why are marriages this hard to deal with.every home seems to have their own issues,none is perfect.
    Anyways for both posters sepration from your spouse might help,take some time away and see what happens in some few months.
    Goodluck.

    ReplyDelete
  33. What did I just read???????? Both of these narratives made my eyes bulge.
    Poster 1: I can't even think straight. .. you made it out alive with your children and now you want to go back? Plus beg him for that matter? I can't with you
    Poster 2: if you are reading this (sister) please please please leave. Damn the consequences people will talk for a few days and move on to something else. Don't ever let a man tell you more than once that he doesn't want you.

    ReplyDelete
  34. God will give u the courage u need to get away

    ReplyDelete
  35. Marriage! Marriage! Marriage! Why is it hurting people? Why can't people live as one? Why so much hate after women conceive? Is it a crime to have kids? Why? Why? Why are some men monsters? It hurts me to hear about domestic violence!!! It's only a weak man that hits a women! My dear ladies if it's not worth it please leave, it's not a do or die affair.....i pray you find peace in your lives and homes.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. D best thing is for women to carry iron mind oooo.....
      Me don talk my own!!!
      I bet if women get iron mind like men...problems go dey less


      WIFE BEATERS ARE DESTINY DESTROYERS!

      Delete
  36. Sometimes,I wonder why men suddenly change from good to bad and even stop caring for their wives and children. Some women will tell u that they are married to the most amazing men on earth but they suddenly changed from being amazing to beast.These women should try and examine themselves because,there must be reasons for their husbands sudden change.I pray God heal their home.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wait till d man starts cheating and see him turn into a monster. The wife necessary may not be d cause even though at a point most of them snap and starting fighting back but who would blame them.

      Delete
    2. So as you are an adult, a mere man can change your fundamental good nature? Then that means you were not a good person to start with

      Delete
    3. The husbands change because a side chick has taken over their minds, bodies and souls. Simple!

      Delete
  37. Poster 1 - yoou have to pray for your husband. It seems he is no longer with his senses.

    Poster 2 - you sister wants to die there. There is little or nothing we can do.

    ReplyDelete
  38. LADY IGO SAYS TO POSTER ONE:

    DID YOU TAKE PART IN THE FAST; IF NOT WHY NOT? YOU CAN BEGIN TODAY . . .

    We always tell ladies that it is that time "he worships the ground you walk on" that these issues (in marriage) should be trashed out. But do you know the problem? Instead of discussing those issues, they usually resort to sex, sex, sex, sex and sex. Truth be told, when there is a fracture of a marital relationship, it is the women and kids that suffer most! How many ladies has ever discussed these issues during courtship:
    * Family finances
    *careers and home management
    *number of kids
    *the challenges of parenting
    *faith and "church" attendance
    *callings/visions
    *in laws/ relations and how to handle them
    *wedding and the need to save
    *investments for family and kids
    *joint accounts/family accounts
    * etc. etc. etc.

    NOW HOW MANY LADIES AND THEIR FIANCE "OPENED LEGS" AND DID THE FOLLOWING SEX STYLES during courtship;

    *Doggy style
    *"Blow jobs"
    *pu**y eating etc, etc. etc. etc.

    Yes identify yourselves . . . We've come to realize that a lot of ladies that have issues including domestic abuse never really had courtship; they may have been engaged for years but all they do is "open legs" and try to "satisfy him in bed". LADIES, SATISFYING A MAN SEXUALLY DOES NOT MAKE HIM MARRY YOU it does not make for a good and enduring marriage. If it is only sex that a man needs, then the brothels a teaming with ladies that can do that and more!

    Ladies, be wise!

    A lady we know once got married to "a preacher" after 2 years of courtship. 2 month after the wedding, this lady was in hospital having lost a pregnancy (lost a baby) from domestic violence from husband's beating. He actually kicked her tummy with his boots. It was then we began to ask; "did he ever beat you during courtship" and she opened up that during courtship, they were having sex secretly and she aborted once.

    Yes that was where the man lost every "respect" for her. They both lived a hypocritical life and there is nothing concealed that will not be made manifest.

    POSTER, THIS MAY NOT BE YOUR STORY BUT WE TELL THESE STORIES FOR OTHER LADIES TO LEARN TO CLOSE THEIR LEGS AND FACE THE IMPORTANT THINGS IN THIS INSTITUTION CALLED MARRIAGE.

    FROM LADY IGO WITH REGARDS.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes oooo....na d wommen dey suffer because they are always at loosing end....no be me o!!

      If pa Chiboy should leave me today, omo I don waka to be that oooo!!!

      No time!!!

      Delete
    2. God bless you! People don't court these days! They are pre-occupied with changing dps with bae's pictures, posting their love on instagram and planning pre-wedding shoots! Nobody thrashes out important issues!
      I met someone recently whose fiancee hid an extremely important deal breaking fact from him, one that if he opened his eyes and asked the right questions he would have discovered. On confronting her, her response and behaviour astounded him. He called off the engagement and the relationship is no more.
      Know your partners well!! Push EVERY button pushable! And most importantly, if a person shows you who they are, believe them the first time!!

      Delete
    3. Lady Igo, can I join the fast if I am pregnant? please give me the details. ..

      Thank you.

      Delete
    4. IGO or whatever you call yourself,you need to learn to be quiet sometimes. Your pattern of writing is beginning to irritate my sight, What!

      You'll be here forming Single/married counsellor all the time; the quest here is, Is your life,marriage,home, family, personality, strength, acclaimed Christian life worth emulating?
      You castigate,lament,pull down, shake-up and all: yet why do I have this feeling you're suffering from putrid personality? Someone consoling are illusion with depkon fantasy called experience. Just stop it already!!!! you ain't matured yet for this ministry. Until you learn to walk with people in pains and help them come out as fine gold in all circumstances,you're very much unfit and mentally unhealthy to judge them left alone imagine.

      To both posters, if you where to help evaluate between married in pain and single with peace and chances to excel, what will be your take?. Lead your self. Reflect on all side and win your battles with God's wisdom

      Delete
    5. @Nakpozie, I billion likes and plenty e-hug for dis ur comment. Some pple on dis blog are Sabina and Sabinus yet dem own matter worst pass that of d woman with d issue of blood in d bible. Those claiming "I don get strong mind, if my husband do dis I do dat" na dem man de beat until dem faint and na water or milk and malt go fit revive dem.

      Delete
    6. Sex is an institution 4 marriage
      she trying to tell u all soul ties fornicators open up to false promises. The reason the married woman doesn't want to leave its fear n soul ties. Doors r opened n post marriage there's a conflict
      prior u were honouring the devil post now honoring God. Sorry the devil not let u all in peace. Its not only sex u open doors to its covenants love portion. Fear of bx single u don't do due diligence or work on urself worth.
      Please join the queue both posters to fast u wouldn't regret it.
      Its not only sex covenants

      Delete
    7. Olori why beat around the bush na???
      Abeg call names o cos me like quarrel well well..

      I no send o

      Delete
  39. Narrative number 1&2
    If you don't have a leg you better borrow one now and leave the man with his kill you with his madness.

    ReplyDelete
  40. Please anybody that gets beaten by a man no matter what she does should run!!!!

    Is sdk parry in ph still holding sef?

    ReplyDelete
  41. LADY IGO SAYS TO BOTH POSTERS;

    SOME LADIES ARE STILL FASTING; ASKING GOD TO HEAL THEIR HOMES . . .

    WHY NOT JOIN THEM?

    "Godliness is profitable for all things . . ." First Timothy chapter four

    LADY IGO WITH REGARDS.

    ReplyDelete
  42. Her corpse will come back to her father's house , Rubbish! Who has time to advice an idiot? Let her remain there nd die then d girl he impregnated will finish her kids wit beating ........marriage na by force? Nigeria women wake up .

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Don't mind Dem oooo...
      Marriage na oxygen for Dem..
      Dey can't live without a man...



      Smtcheeeeerwwww nonsense!!!

      Delete
  43. Why are some folks always concerned about what will people say? I don't get it. Folks must always talk, we just have to live our lives devoid of unnecessary baggage.

    ReplyDelete
  44. Similar stories. What you both need is a break and when your husbands come back to their senses, they will apologize and if you are still interested take them back while stating what you will take and not take from the world GO. Poster 1 however, pls get busy fast. What if your husband dies today what will you fall back on. Lessons to all women, never ever stay idle especially with flimsy excuse of child birth. Check out successful women and you will be shocked at the nos of kids they have or wish to have and still run the world.

    ReplyDelete
  45. What's DH sef. I had tot it meant diaspora husband. Lol . Help me out a beg

    ReplyDelete
  46. Narr1...A man can't treat you like trash and you ask if you should go back and beg him,beg him for what if i may ask honey? Beg him for turning you to a punching bag,beg him for making you miserable and less of a woman? No honey. Do not beg him,stay in your uncles place and pick the pieces of your life back,get a job no matter how minor it is and see how happy and peaceful your life would be.
    But if your hubby comes to beg you instead,be open to reconciliation,but do not let him lord over you,not again!
    Narr2...Tell you sis to leave that man and go somewhere far away for sometime until he changes for the better. People keep suffering and dying in their marriages just because they are cautious of what people would say,damn what people would say and fight for your happiness and life first.
    This is so heartbreaking.

    ReplyDelete
  47. Women and sex sha. Women dating or married to panel beaters the Lord is your muscle. Low self-esteem won't let you see clearly. You will keep hiding under the umbrella of children. Your kids will grow and resent you. Why not leave while you can?worried about what people would say, is there a time people won't talk? You die through spousal abuse they would still insult you so to what end. Women who stay on abusive relationships better admit they stay for the sex yes sex. They feel no other man will want them at least after the beating their men would still give them correct knacking once in a while. My girlfriend was in such relationships and when her bf finally dumped her she was crying up and down instead of rejoicing that she was free from abuse. She said guy can knack for Africa as in e no dey tire and she likes that so the beating doesn't matter. She even said where would she start from, mind you relationship was just a year old before he called it off.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lmao @knacking.. Funny but very true indeed.

      Delete
  48. Posters 1 & 2:
    Please for the love of God put yourself and your kids first. Poster 1, get a job and start loving yourself again. The sign was there even when he sent you to hospital you still stayed with him. My dear, begging him is digging your grave.

    Poster 2: I hope you read this. Move today. Forget about court of public opinions, they will be the same people that will dance on your grave. Whether he is claiming your kids or not, just leave and stay alive for your kids.
    Good luck to both of you.

    ReplyDelete
  49. Stella couldn't have said it any better

    Ladies once a man tells you to stop working have it at the back of your mind he wants to be in control of your mind, body, soul and everything that concerns you

    Be wise
    Mine will sign an agreement to that effect NO TIME

    ReplyDelete
  50. WHAT IS HAPPENING TO MEN OF OUR GENERATION exactly. is it we women dat are not training our boys well or dey are just cursed from God. how do u have liver to beat up ur wife bcos she confronted u abt cheating.
    POSTER 1 AND 2, I don't have advice cos im passing thru mine. im still yet to determine if im in an abusive relationship myself.
    My boyfriend of 2yrs and fiancé slapped me for d 1st time abt a mth ago. We were argueing and my mouth became sharp. nxt thing I hear slap. its like even him was shocked, he started hugging me and apologizn. he also uses words like idiot,crazy,mad all sorts. Asides dat he's a very caring person, but has a temper. He has also once pushed me during an argument.
    I JUST HOPE IM NOT ENTERING ONE CHANCE. If he can slap me while dating, I just hope he wont beat me in d future. We don't live in same state, so we'v neva been 2geda more dan few days at 1nce.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Live with him for 2months then you will find out,but don't have sex

      Delete
    2. LOL keep hoping sister hope. Waiting for your chronicles in few years time. I am sure you guys had the bomb make up sex after the slap. The women in these chronicles too saw it before the wedding but were hoping like you are now. Hope well mama hope.

      Delete
    3. Walk away from the relationship

      Delete
    4. Get out of that relationship! (I am screaming these words at you)! You don't know how fortunate you are that he has showed his true colour BEFORE marriage. He will use pressing iron to create a permanent imprint on your back after you get married! You are asking if you have not entered one chance????? Unbelievable! Get the hell out of that relationship if you don't want your parents to bury you a few months to years after marriage. Once a man hits you once and you allow him to get away with it, he will hit you again and the intensity of pain that he will inflict each time will be greater than the last. Get out now!

      Delete
    5. The one chance is seriously loading and you are the driver.he will beat you well after you get married. No be prophecy. Na fact. Borrow crutches if you no get leg run now

      Delete
    6. Man beater alert! Danger!!

      If he slaps/beats you the first time, he will do it again. If a man slaps/beats me while in courtship, he must pay for that, the kind conditions I go give am eh. Infact, I will slap/beat back sharp sharp..den we cn tell ourselves sorry. He shud taste the slap/beating too, nonsense!

      Delete
    7. Anon 22:55 u got my ribs cracking. Not funny though.

      Well I suggest u stay with him for at least a month before u make ur final decision. He cannot possibly hide his true character for that long. So one month is enough to find out. Good luck

      Delete
    8. Any man who hits you once, will hit you over and over again. They never change.
      With mariage, it becomes worse cos they believe they own you and can kill you if they deem.
      The decision is yours to make.
      To stay or to walk away from violence

      Delete
  51. At Poster 1,
    U be confirm mumu!
    U Packed ur own load by ursef and left ur husband house?
    Dis man ddnt chase u oo, na u carry ur load comot ursef.
    U wld just suffer n die for nothing.
    And here u are, asking weda u shld go back or not. Lmao!
    U are listening to electronic advice frm total strangers wu wldnt take dia own advice.

    U no what u just did?
    Uv made the crack in ur marriage much wider for a lizard to Pass thru.
    U better Pack ur tins and return home, and Pray ur hubby oPens dat door to u.
    And I hoPe u avnt been at ur uncle's too long 4 ur hubby to adaPt to a bachelor's life.
    U don't av to beg him if u are too Proud, bang him insted.
    U tink u are a single gal lik me, wu can walk out anytime.
    U work on ur marriage.
    U consider ur kids.
    And u tink abt ur own sanity too.

    D oly woman wu is entitled to work out of a marriage.
    Is a working woman, wu az investment, n wu can sue d man too, so e can tk Part in d resPonsibilities of his kids.

    If u are tired of ur marriage, strategize, b4 u leave. If not u wld watch ur kids suffer for nothing, wile ur hubby wld be tearing chicken n Picking his teeth wit a fresh babe(wu wld manage d man without hassels)

    Go back home, avoid anytin dat wld make him hit u, if e doesn't give u money, ask ur kid to go and ask daddy.
    And try watch the movie 'Without my dauta'
    KPele, its well!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol@electronic advice. You people won't kill person oh.

      Delete
  52. Jixus bu eze.........This thing called Marriage na wa o,to some its sweet to some na bitterleaf.....P1 & 2 all can say is Jesus fix it

    ReplyDelete
  53. Ladies, say no to domestic violence!

    ReplyDelete
  54. Poster 1: Harden your heart and pick a hustle when he sees you succeeding without him, he will comeback crying for your forgiveness. Then you will have the power to decide whether or not you want him back.

    Poster: Show yourself some love and leave that toxic marriage. If indeed he is your God ordained husband, then God will heal your marriage. Until then choose life and forget about what people will say.You are the one wearing your shoe and you alone know where it pinches.
    May God heal all the sick marriages out there.

    ReplyDelete
  55. P1, you can go and beg him to beat your senses to auto correct please. P2, I just wish your sister sees this. The man UA still nice. Once he blinds her eyes then she would know whats up

    ReplyDelete
  56. And why are these men beating their wives??? They not getting enough pussy or what???


    ~Stella na me~

    ReplyDelete
  57. Poster 1&2 turn to God in prayers he has all d answers nd he has d ability to restore peace in ur lives

    ReplyDelete
  58. what will people say ? well I will tell you what people will say . At your burial that is, I mean you and all of us know that is where it will end up .... but I digress that day people will say
    Chei ! how will the children cope ? such a young woman ? why didn't she leave ? she should have come home ? why , why why ....
    But am sure that is cool with you , you know being dead and all . I mean after all is better to die as MRS somebody instead of LIVE as a divorced mother of 2 <<>>
    make una no ask me how I feel about this lol

    ReplyDelete
  59. Let me say something,
    When a man has a sidechic turning his head, at that point, his wife should either wait and pray until it is over or leave.
    The truth is, his senses are not 100 percent intact so don't even do anything to aggravate the situation or you and your children will lose out.

    That period is when you are suppose to pray more and be as calm as ice because he is looking for any fault to chase you out.

    If you confront him, he will run to the sidechic...
    If you ask him for money, he will run to the sidechic

    Poster 1...Your story seems edited. Too many inaccuracies. All i can tell you is, wait it out, pray and be silent.

    Poster2...your sister needs lots of counseling. She is afraid to leave because of our societal treatment to divorcees.
    If she leaves, you will start making fun of her tomorrow for being a divorcee. Any little quarrel, you will remind her that she failed as a wife and her husband does not want her.
    She prefers to die than become a divorcee.
    This is the reason abused wives keep going back to their husbands.

    XOXO MYSTERY

    ReplyDelete
  60. I hate lazy women who depend on their husband for everything, why won't ur hubby treat u badly when u ve decided to tie ur 2 hands and leg like a mermaid, go and work and earn ur own money so that ur hubby can respect u.

    ReplyDelete
  61. I hate lazy women who depend on their husband for everything, why won't ur hubby treat u badly when u ve decided to tie ur 2 hands and leg like a mermaid, go and work and earn ur own money so that ur hubby can respect u.

    ReplyDelete
  62. I hate lazy women who depend on their husband for everything, why won't ur hubby treat u badly when u ve decided to tie ur 2 hands and leg like a mermaid, go and work and earn ur own money so that ur hubby can respect u.

    ReplyDelete
  63. I hate lazy women who depend on their husband for everything, why won't ur hubby treat u badly when u ve decided to tie ur 2 hands and leg like a mermaid, go and work and earn ur own money so that ur hubby can respect u.

    ReplyDelete
  64. DOmestic violence

    Some men and devil have become siblings both in spiritual and physical world.

    Women don't wait until they kill you.

    ReplyDelete
  65. Some Clergy men won't advice any woman to continue staying with a violent man.

    ReplyDelete
  66. Poster 2 pls leave now that you have life which gives you hope of a better tomorow. Pls don't wait till u are dragged out in bags or lifeless. Pls use your brain. It is not a do or die affair

    ReplyDelete
  67. Its well, men of dis generation are beast. Remorse is not in their dictionary at all. Social media has done a lot of harm dan good in families. May God give d posters wisdom!

    ReplyDelete
  68. Poster 1: I understand how u feel. though I am still single but dated a guy that exhibited the same funny attitude as ur hubby. there was beating but the presence of another chic and when i asked what was going on, he flared up like a lion on a hot charcoal and the stupid me even apologized. my dear, you did not do anything wrong. focus on you and your kids and get a job jare.

    ReplyDelete
  69. Hmmm...# hands akibo # ... S-i-g-h!!!

    #1, you say he is an amazing man ... Then all of a sudden he turned into a wife beater??? And you are thinking of begging him after beating you?

    #2, you say he is denying the paternity of the 2nd child ... and your sister is afraid of what people will say? ... and she is an ardent reader of this blog?

    I will reserve my comment until I get more info from the posters in the comment section ... Or hear the other side.
    Nitty.

    ReplyDelete
  70. Say NO to domestic violence.It kills pls run;It happen to me too guess what i did i ran

    ReplyDelete
  71. This is for both posters 1 and 2:
    I want you to know that there is more to life than abuse, your husband's role is that of protector, priest of the household so if you are experiencing the opposite then my advise to you is RUN! The truth is, we live in a different time from our parents but somehow we are still made to feel that the old rules apply, they don't. Women these days make a better living than their husbands, I'm not saying that money is everything but it's a start, it affords you the financial independence that allows you to stand on your own two feet, it allows you think clearly and decide if you want to return to the abuse. One step at a time, find a small job that allows you fend for your kids and avoid all this terrorism, that actually what you're experiencing. E-hugs!

    ReplyDelete
  72. This is for both posters 1 and 2:
    I want you to know that there is more to life than abuse, your husband's role is that of protector, priest of the household so if you are experiencing the opposite then my advise to you is RUN! The truth is, we live in a different time from our parents but somehow we are still made to feel that the old rules apply, they don't. Women these days make a better living than their husbands, I'm not saying that money is everything but it's a start, it affords you the financial independence that allows you to stand on your own two feet, it allows you think clearly and decide if you want to return to the abuse. One step at a time, find a small job that allows you fend for your kids and avoid all this terrorism, that actually what you're experiencing. E-hugs!

    ReplyDelete
  73. Hmmm Violence Is In Two Forms - Verbal And Physical... Verbal Abuse Is A Precursor To Physical Abuse And Physical Abuse May Lead To Murder. In As Much More Male Folks Are Guilty Of The Latter - Female Folks Are Guilty Of The Former... This Is Common And It Shows Humanity Is Yet To Fully Grasp The Concept Of Peaceful Coexistence

    Secondly....Guys can change for various reasons, He might find out the lady cheated on him from way back and has a forgiveness issue - this is why honesty and openness is key to having healthy friendship which leads to cordial relationship etc


    My 2 cents...

    ReplyDelete
  74. Narrative 1 & 2

    Prophet Elijah wouldn't come and resurrect una from una Graves o if u die in that abusive marriage
    As for those blaming Poster 1 that the baby might not be the husband"s, did he do a DNA test?

    If without sin,then cast the 1st stone instead advise them and walk away,dont make issues worse for them.

    We should learn to be subtle @ times when dealing with sensitive issues.

    One love to u all!

    ReplyDelete
  75. U better run for dear life...tufiakwa

    ReplyDelete
  76. Poster 1:pray or goan do jazz to tie him down like a goat that he is.

    Poster 2: see above.

    ReplyDelete
  77. Perhaps poster 1 something is not right somewhere with you..how the hell is this person you described amazing?????? I'm afraid of you sef cos your threshold for nonsense is so high, you're actually asking if you should go back and beg...ina eyim egu...

    Poster 2 already knows what to do, but is scared of what people that don't give a hoot about her will say...nne pack and go..Ada

    ReplyDelete
  78. #1: Sweetheart, I am sorry you had to go through that. It's bad enough where a lady has to go through physical and emotional abuse but it's precariously pathetic where children are involved.‎ You don't want your kids to grow up without their father playing the fatherly role and at the same time, you must ensure your kids grow up under a healthy environment. It's like a catch 22 situation.

    It's not pleasant but it's always better when you've experienced a loving relationship with your spouse prior to things going awry. That way it is indisputable that something is amiss but it can be tackled and you will get your loving husband back along with your marriage being restored. Unlike some cases where the men in question never loved their wives and had been abusing them right from the days of courtship. Even if such a man is under some evil influences, it will be hard to discern bad character from evil manipulation because he never showed any loving side from day 1.

    I always support the idea of victims of domestic abuse removing themselves from the abusive environment first so that they don't keep suffering while they seek help. I'm glad you did. You need a conducive atmosphere to clear your head and search your mind to be sure that you didn't in anyway act as a catalyst. My darling, I'm not trying to justify any form of abuse because, in my mind, there exists no such justification for any animalistic behaviour towards either gender. However, I know certain cases where some ill-mannered women bring out the beasts in their spouses. There's no harm in working on bad habits to make a better version of you. I'm all for continuous self improvement. 

    Now that you've moved out temporarily, you have to call your parents and your in-laws for another meeting. You took their initial advice of "be patient, things will get better", clearly it didn't work. You can't be expected to keep being patient if you're dead(God forbid) so something has to give. Of course, you can't underestimate the power of prayer. You must keep praying for the restoration of your home while you take proactive steps by getting both families involved. Unfortunately, a lot of men behave similarly to that of your hubby when their side chics call but they don't hit their wives with such intensity that she wakes up in the emergency room.

    My darling, there's a different between submissiveness and slavery. As a wife, there are instances where I'm forced to apologise to put an end to a "cold war" because I don't want it lingering but there are certain cases where an apology is ridiculous and demeaning (strictly my opinion). It is he who should apologise for the  brutish treatment of his wife and mother of his kids‎. Certain issues must be resolved before you return home with the kids. I will advise against divorce for now. It's better to try all avenues to make it work, he should try counselling to deal with his anger issues and you must see the improvement and his remorse if not, the abuse will continue and you may not be alive to tell your story (God forbid). I pray things get better in your home.
    #e-bearhugs. ‎

    ReplyDelete
  79. Who's this lady igo self????

    ReplyDelete
  80. @poster 1:I am so sorry that you are passing through all the maltreatments that you wrote but I have to say that your story doesn't give a clear picture of what someone can really use and deduce the problem because in the beginning you created a picture of a man that worshiped the ground that you walked on;so sit down and ask yourself what went wrong and where.I must advice you to do it with open mindedness.I don't support him hitting you but he seems like a person under an influence of something.Be prayerful and I believe with time everything will be ok.

    ReplyDelete
  81. LADY IGO SAYS TO PREGNANT WOMEN AND TO THIS POSTER:

    Anonymous said...
    Lady Igo, can I join the fast if I am pregnant? please give me the details. ..

    Thank you.
    7 May 2015 at 17:43

    PLEASE WE DO NOT ADVICE PREGNANT WOMEN TO FAST FROM FOOD ENTIRELY. WHAT I DID DURING MY PREGNANCIES IS TO EAT FRUITS AND VEGETABLE AND MILK AND ONE WHOLESOME MEAL AT NIGHT. DENYING MYSELF IN THIS WAY MADE ME MORE ALERT TO PRAYER AND MEDITATION IN GOD'S WORD. It also made me gain very little baby fat which I easily lost after delivery. More so, my babies did not get so big and labor was good and smooth. Please stay away from sugar drinks (coke, pepsi and co) as this will give you excess weight and big babies/difficult labor.

    If in doubt; please consult your obstetrician.

    LADY IGO WITH REGARDS.

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  82. LADY IGO SAYS TO NAKPOZIE;

    I LOVE YOU; MAY THE LORD BLESS YOU AND KEEP YOU.
    MAY EVERYTHING GOOD BE YOURS.

    REGARDS.

    ReplyDelete
  83. Hmmm battery n abuse?...Please posters for the sake of ur kids n fam if u don't value ur lives abeg dust ur slippers put under armpit run 4 ur lives. Av bin dat road b4 n trust me leaving was d best decision ever.who gives a flying fuck wot ppl or society says wen ur lives r at risk.my saving grace n option 2 was d fact I had n still have a good job n biz dat pays my bills n my daughter. It'll be hard at first but later u'll b glad u did. This life no hard abeg.it goes on.marriage no b do or die.#awordisenuf. E - hugs. #Fixitjesus

    ReplyDelete
  84. #2: Honey, apparently my comments regarding #1's predicament also applies here. One of the sad things about enduring an abusive relationship is the abused begins to believe all the derogatory remarks made by the abuser and the already slow self-esteem further diminishes till it gets to the point where the abused completely loses his /her identity. The abused suffers a rape on his/her personally which makes him/her feel worthless and not deserving of a better treatment. Even if some abused persons quits that abusive relationship, most of them end up in another abusive relationship because of the wrong mind set.

    How can she not get both families involved by having a meeting? Honey, domestic violence isn't to be treated with kid gloves. It must be addressed and handled with all seriousness because her life and sanity are being threatened or does she have something to hide? A husband kicks out his wife, who has allegedly suffered various forms of abuse. He goes further to cast aspersions on her integrity by questioning the paternity of the last child and she still remains with him because...? 

    Doesn't ‎it make it less complicated for her to leave since he already threw her belongings out? Apparently he isn't too keen to have full custody of the kids, especially the last child, so what exactly is her concern about her girls? In law, it is said that you can't force a willing employee on an unwilling employer. Your sister should get her girls and move out to a safer place for now and watch how things play out. Whether or not she chooses to remain in that marriage is solely her decision to make. However, she must realise that life post divorce can be very daunting and frustrating so she must be ready to make certain sacrifices just in case things don't work out as planned. It's prudent to count the cost before erecting a building. I hope she finds peace in whatever decision she makes. Honey, thanks for being a good sister, she's lucky to have you by her side. 
    #e-bearhugs. ‎

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  85. Poster 1:fry his balls
    Poster 2;kill him

    ReplyDelete

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