Hmmmmmm.....
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
INTROVERT FIANCE
Good day Stella. Please hide my identity as I want you and fellow bvs to help me out with advice and please pardon my write-up error thanks.
My fiance has a bad side of keeping secrets to himself. Sometimes he only tells me when he can't control the outcome anymore and we do quarrel over his actions and other times I would give him advice on how to handle the situation.
There was a time he bought a car and I found out after months and I had to keep calm even though I was hurt due to our closeness.
Now my main problem is that he wants me to help him buy a plot of land (he's not in the country at the moment) and build for him without involving any of his family members. I don't think this is right because I live close to his family house and he said I shouldn't tell even his mom.
What if they find out later and tag me a bad person or wanting to turn their son away from them? To think that our wedding ceremony is under preparations and they might call ofF the wedding because I know what the mom is capable of.
And this fiance of mine said after our wedding he will minimize his closeness with his parents and he usually keeps to his words.
Should I refuse to help him?
Should I tell his mom codedly?
Should I just adhere to his order?
Please your red pen is needed Stella.
*What kind of wahala is this?must his mum know everything?it seems you are naive,continue telling the mum,the day you stop you will be tagged as the one who wanna break up the family.please do as your man says and keep quiet....
If they find out,you will deny having anything to do with it...simple...lol
Na wa o....one day somehow they will find out, hmmmm.
ReplyDeleteBuild your future house bo, must you tell his mum? They will not be angry with him after all it’s not your place to tell them plus they are the ones that gave birth to “legend of secrets” if they eventually find out you can just apologize but keep the secret.
DeleteNow my main problem is how you will live together when you are married, I know he was raised this way, how will you cope? Hmm better speak to him about it o
Poster Stella's advice is bae! Take it and keep your mouth shut.
ReplyDeleteHAHAHHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH. Fan-belt hope you will do the same madam keep your mouth shut. you that will tell your mother in-law straight up. fayday i sabi you pass your self no let me expose you.
DeleteHe knows his people more than you do. Do as he says.
ReplyDeleteExactly.. Just keep shut, do it as he says and if they happen to find out, you can tell them you're doing it as a contractor for "someone" and smile while telling them. Lol
DeleteJust know that if he minimize his closeness with his family, you will have to do the same too. Are you prepared for that? Your fiancé is a weirdo. One day, your turn will come when he will keep a secret from you that could kill you. Continue...
ReplyDeletePoster your fiance is a wise man, do not be foolish. Do as he says Abeg, he wants to start life with you. His family must not know everything.
ReplyDeleteLoud it for her queen johda, it seems poster's ears and brain are paining her.
DeleteImagine, "the mum can call of the wedding".
Ready to betray her man because of wedding.
I wish her fiance is a bv and read this chronicle and call off the wedding true true.
Some people just enjoy involving the world in their affairs.. I feel differently. Adhere to his directives before you create unnecessary drama for yourself
ReplyDeleteTHIS IS SERIOUS
ReplyDeleteYour busy body is out of this world. Do you know his people more than him? Respect his decisions and do what he wants the way he wants it. If they ever find out, you’ll simply feign ignorance and even fake quarrel. When he’s ready, he’ll open up to you and tell you the reason for his decision, don’t force it.
ReplyDeleteThis is Dicey, your telling his mom can cause issues between both of you.. I am team loyalty.He knows his family better so I will advice you keep his secrets so far its not life threatening.
ReplyDeleteWe have a secret in my family that its just us siblings that knows about it.Our dad doesn't even know and i will keep it that way until the person involved decides to share.(That's how loyal i am.)
All the Best
You dont know how blessed you are to have a man like him.
ReplyDeleteWhere do your loyalties lie?
Your man or his family?
Madam poster do want your man wants and don't complain or worry.. Is that too hard? Who should you be loyal to?
DeleteWhat***
DeleteOxygen u hav said it all. My man is exactly lyk dis. N i kno i can kill smbody n tell my man n his people, esp his mom won’t even hear abt it. Pls respect his opinion. U see those people called inlaws???? U can neva please them. It is his land, his money, his family and not yours.
DeleteThey are not married yet. It's a big problem. How would you all feel if a gf/fiancee is the one building the house of your son/brother. It shows that he doesn't trust his family.
DeleteI'll rather he contract the project out. Don't have anything to do with this kind of project. It will pit you against his family especially the mum.
And they will definitely know before the house is finished.
Pls be careful. It's a banana peel. It can be slippery and can injure you.
#hadeyhalaba
...so u still believe that kindergaten lie that banana peel can injure someone?
DeleteWhat did the family do to lose his trust?
This might even be her 1st test to see how she handles money & also test her loyalty! Who else is better to entrust a building project to than a loyal spouse.
Mumu girl go and tell his mum since you want to be a good wife. Yeye.
ReplyDeleteFiance that knows whats up, you want to spoil it for him.
Una mumu don do for this blog
Hahahahahahahahahahah yori yori haff vex
DeleteBut I understand her concerns. They blame every single thing on the woman in Nigeria. And worst part is that the men usually keep mute and let the wife take the fall when things like that happen because they want to look good in their families’ eyes. Plus this one is already showing signs of of not being 100% reliable when required and keeping mute when he’s meant to speak about something. I just feel sorry for poster because it seems like she’s about to marry into an unsure situation. Fiancé isn’t 100% trusted to have your back, his mother is capable of stopping the wedding/ marriage. It’s a bit extreme but are you sure you’re even in the right lane to start with?
DeleteImagine o, a young man is trying to code his life and not leave it in the open for bad belle but no you want to help him broadcast it. He even trusts you enough to send you money to build on his behalf but no you want to announce it as the newscaster that you are, you people complain about everything. “He doesn’t talk, he talks too much, his dick is big, his dick is small, he no dey last pass 2mins, ah he wan kill me with fuck e no dey gree my kini rest”
ReplyDeleteNot everything must be termed as chronicle, sometimes think about it in your head over and over again before you decide on sending it out.
No human is perfect, ask yourself why he’d hide something like a car that it’s not like someone can put in a bag without anyone noticing. Maybe it’s because you talk too much, probably want to take picture and post on the gram. Let the man hide his affairs until he is ready, it’s not your money he is using to do these things.
Hahahahahahaah as in ehn, women haff plenty issues I swear down.
DeleteI see you Doppel 🙌👌👏😂
DeleteCorrect!
DeleteDon't mind her jaweeee she think say nah everything wan Ear hear nau mouth dey talk. Poster carry loudspeaker and tell his Mother..
DeletePoster, please just do as he has told you, you do not know his family more than him. Plssss
ReplyDeleteOthers are praying for Men that re not overly controlled by family you have one and is complaining.
ReplyDeleteMy dear don't start what you can't finish. once the mother starts meddling in your home wahala dey.
After marriage will you be reporting every plan to the mother. It's you and your home. Work on getting him to involve you more in his decisions.
We ladies wahala be like that fly wey petch for akpa amu
ReplyDeleteIf im dey tell im mama everything, you say na mama's boy
say that MIL na winch.
E come say make una build una home without involving im mama
you say im mama go call off wedding?
Wetin you want sisi, make the guy mud before im waka go altar?
As I see you so, e bi like say na you go carry ya hand scatter this ya matrimoni o?
what is akpa amu?
DeleteScrotum 🙈
DeleteThis one isn't a mummy's boy now, you are complaining again. You aren't even happy that he isn't involving his family members in his relationship. And pls stop telling his mom everything
ReplyDeleteTell him your fears and that it will be better if you tell his mama that you are the one building.
ReplyDeleteOr will they suspect anything, based on your income?
Not compulsory to tell his mom maybe cause of family reasons but be prepared when he starts hiding things from you too after you marry him because u will be family then.just strong your mind for future wonders!
ReplyDeleteNawa o
ReplyDeletePoster the man know his family more than you so do as he say
ReplyDeletePoster your fiance has his reason for keeping it a secret, he sure knows his family more than you , so biko please nNne; leave it the way he want it.
ReplyDeleteMadam na ur kind of man i like no be mamas boy
ReplyDeleteseal ur mouth and build that house in peace.he knows his family more than u do.maybe they will discourage him or squander his money if he tell them
Hmmm. I "sense a sense Here"
ReplyDeleteYou better follow his instructions and keep your mouth shut.
ReplyDeletePoster adhere to your man's advice. Haba! is not everything you will talk, even when he finally married you, is not everything that is going on in your life and marriage people will know.
ReplyDeleteSee this mumu girl oo. This man knows his people more than you do. Busy body, go and tell his mom and see what will happen to you. Nonsense!!!
ReplyDeletePoster if only you know how lucky u are for having such kinda man. Don't borrow ur sef sense and find an architect to commence the building be there thinking about nonsense what ifs.
ReplyDeleteWhy is it necessary to inform his family? Mind yourself ooo. You want them to hate you abi. Lol. It will backfire at you cos they will feel he trust you more than them. Continue looking for trouble.
ReplyDeleteThere must be a reason why he is pulling away from them and doesn't want to inform his mum. You don't know them better than he does. Don't mistake their smiles for acceptance cos the day they will show you ehhhhh u will see pepper. Drop this attitude of trying to please them over your husband. Trust me it is never enough.
ReplyDeleteMadam pls do as your fiance told you OK. It's not that hard.He has a reason why he doesn't want to involve his family which you don't know.
ReplyDeleteAll the best
Alot of men are like this. I'm tired of complaining about mine.
ReplyDeleteMine won't tell me about his business or ongoing projects. So secretive.
He was building a house and told me about it in passing. Until this house was complete I didn't know.
He would want to travel. Won't tell me the date until very close to the trip. Even on his return he will just call me im coming in tommorrow.
Your fiance seems to be like mine. I just let it slide because I was complaining and complaining and looking like a nag.
He claims his parents are also that way. They don't tell people their travelling dates and plans.
Maybe thats how he was trained true but when you know dat is selfish is when you do same and not tell him and then the picks offense.meaning what is good for the goose isn't good for d gander abi?
DeleteWe were trained like that too...this life na to hidy yourself too
DeleteHighly principle and discipline man. You don't know what made him to come to that conclusion. If you reveal the information to his family then kiss the relationship good bye.
ReplyDeletePoster see if his mum /family finds out.
DeleteTell them that you thought your fiance told them.
Maybe he wanted to do 'surprise' for them.
Iyawo wa,, oya rush and call family meeting. Simple instruction you cannot obey. You want to tell him how to live with his relatives that you only just met and he has been with from birth.
ReplyDeleteSome babes eh.
Big mouth go tell him mama...
ReplyDeletePoster, obey your man. I am a very private person much like your fiance. Until a project is done will I announce it. I never tell anyone my plans as I don't want anything to jinx them. No matter how close you are to me you will not hear pim from my mouth. Loose lips sink ships. Learn the art of being discreet. It is not everyone you open your life story for.
ReplyDeleteposter do as your man has instructed. do not compromise his plans due to your emotions.
ReplyDeleteMy Igbo people will call this condition Ekwurekwu. In Big English it’s Loquacious: the urge to keep on talking and talking.
ReplyDeleteHaunty broadcaster continue to broadcast and soon you will utter something that will scatter your relationship and you will watch how that mother in law will cut ties with you.
You just want to broadcast it online so that people will praise you abi?
People who are happier in their lives know how to contain themselves and your boyfriend is matured enough to know this but instead of you to try and catch up you are rushing to post this annoying chronicle.
Soon you will advertise him to an agile side chick and maybe then you will be satisfied.
I’m in the gym and this chronicle almost made me fall off the treadmill! Mind yourself Haunty.
Poster I think your concerns are valid. There is something about a woman's instinct. You need to sit down and evaluate if you really want to be married to such a secretive dude and be a part of his family. He is hiding from them which casts them in a bad light. He also hides stuff from you which does not speak so well of him, because it means you will always have doubts and can't vouch for him.
ReplyDeleteIf you must go ahead, be prepared to take whatever you find and try to build up your own Assurance as Davido would say. But I bet you already know you can't trust him and y'all ain't married yet.
Poster, are you a mugu? If you know what's good for you, you better follow your man's instructions. You don't know how lucky you are that you have a man who can entrust you with this kinda project. If you know what in-laws are capable of, you will be happy that you have a man that doing things codedly with you rather than his family. This is the kinds man a lot of people desire, not the one that will tell family eveeything instead of you. If you know the kind of trust he has for u with this decision he has made, you will be happy. In-laws trust and love isn't guaranteed or. They flow with the tide. Be wise and do as your man says.
ReplyDeleteAll these people saying follow your man's instructions. Hoja would you feel if your son was building a house and you know nothing about it. I just can't imagine my son not trusting me enough to tell me something so simple.
ReplyDeleteWhy exactly should your son tell or involve you when hes building a house? Is it to help him draw a plan,finance the project or what? Its not like you wont be allowed access to the house when its concluded...
Delete