Ever met a Narcissist? Or are you one?
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Wednesday, June 12, 2019
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Chai. Dem full this blog na
ReplyDeleteI have one as a colleague.Every thing anyone does or says is about her.You could just be having a conversation with another colleague about someone else ..all of a sudden she will assume you are talking about her and start shouting about how she didnt do this or that...I just kukuma avoid her totally. I cant shout. I also think it is some sort of disorder.
ReplyDeleteIt is a personality disorder. My father is one
DeleteThis one na paranoia dey worry am, no be narcissism...
DeleteShe might be calling you out because you are talking about someone else. Bringing attention to your rude,gossip. You were outwitted. Small minds talk about others.
DeleteHey Jesu. This one and Satan are dragging hell.
ReplyDeleteIphie, is there actually a cure for this besides drugs et all?
DeleteAnony I really don’t know. Maybe therapy🤷♀️
DeleteI think therapy might help.
These people are walking talking chaos.
ReplyDeleteUsed to be married to one. They are demons and we all know I don't play with demons.
We all know? Na you tell us sha, we know nothing!
DeleteI was also married to one. The devil is a learner where a narcissist is. Crazy bunch.
Delete15:10 Now you know!
DeleteI'm married to one and my life is a total mess and hell. Also, currently pregnant and he gives no damn. He peddles and slanders me to the whole world and he has refused to seek help even though resources is available to him for free. We are in the US and it is so hard for me to let go. We have 2 beautiful kids.
DeleteYou know he is a narcissist yet you keep allowing yourself to get pregnant. I know it's hard to leave but at least take some control over your life . The more kids you have, the harder it is to escape. And you are in the states where you can get birth control easily
DeleteAnon 15:47,
DeleteThey re usually emotionally unavailable until they need the attention, themselves...
Biko try falling out of love with that one, for the sake of your unborn baby...
I have witnessed a narcissist before, on bbn double wahala.
ReplyDeleteCeeC carry basin and come oh
DeleteThat short yoruba demon abi?
DeleteThat wanted to yeye my Ceec before heaven expose am.
Me too
DeleteFunny enough they see themselves as extremely perfect and would always find a way to always put the blame on you,and if you have low self esteem;you would start thinking you are the one that has an issue.
ReplyDeleteI think it's more of a high level of Bipolar Disorder..Also from what I have observed,they are very intelligent and smart with every move they make..
@MARTINS ABOY
Yes they re smart but when they jam their fellow Narcissists, no be body go tell dem to calm down!
DeleteMe, I think i'm one oo! But the good kind! I humble them when they come my way, because I already see their game before it begins.
You are perfectly correct. My dad is one.
DeleteThis is describing Tobi Bakre. Hehehehehe...That boy has karma practicing.
ReplyDeleteI married one and eventually walked out of the marriage, they are crazy like that. They feed on ego and attempt to destroy others.
ReplyDeleteIf you notice this type, act foolish, but maintain your self esteem still... That's how you change them.
DeleteAnon @ 15:15,
DeleteSorry u can't change a narcissist character/ person like that.
Rather what u do is avoid exposing ur true feelings around them, asvin hide ur feelings. Deceive them & fool them!!!
Mess back with their head. Indirectly turn them into looser, destroy their agenda.
U know what kills them is silent treatment, not doing any back & forth with them. Shame them when & if u can to make other people see them for real.
In many work places, among families, narcissistic person is the star, most highly placed one, and they manage to fool & destroy others for very long time.
In fact they r mad, but not walking about naked on the street or feeding from the dump..as otherwise u think every mad person do.
15:53 You said it all. 🖕
Deleteif you meet them,don't pretend just run, faster than your legs can carry you. They they can even break down the most confident and successful person.
Delete@ Anon 15.53 - 100 percent accurate!
Delete@ push up - I agree o! Run away.
I have family members that are like this,, very cruel but to outside world, they're the best .. every bad they planned against me, I turned it to there face, I ensured they are the one that is being humiliated.. God was very on my side, if not
DeleteGod I will forever be grateful... narcissists; they don't have Joy, so they can't give it...so sad
King Solomon met a lot of them:
ReplyDeleteEcclesiastes 7:26 I discovered that a seductive woman is a trap more bitter
than death. Her passion is a snare, and her soft hands are chains.
Those who are pleasing to God will escape her, but sinners will be caught in her snare.
Proverbs 22:14 The mouth of an adulterous woman is a deep pit; a man who is under the LORD's wrath falls into it.
😯😯😯😯😯😯
Most men from broken homes are narcissists
ReplyDeleteMost Narcissists just need love, honestly! If they re the needy type & U don't give them the amount of attention/care needed, it brings out the devil in them.
DeleteBut true love humbles them eventually!
Anon 15:40. This Is not true, no matter the amount of love you give them they aren't humbled, forget it. I was married to one, showed him all the love, they need therapy,thats all
DeleteOh Stella how God saved me from one ehhh, inshort i think he was a psychopath a guy man has so much money and really wanted to settle down Asap... The way he reasons, think, God please never let me jamb such a human being again mbuk... till today i can't find the right word to explain how that guy is, And he feels he the best guy ever God. In summary i dated a mad man cos e pass narcissists
ReplyDeleteBiko gist us the story na, make we learn.
DeleteWalahi that's my dad is there....
ReplyDeleteStella they keep tap to see how far you have gone, my ex can even pay millions of naira to get information about me, and funny enough you won't be able to find the words to explain how he is, but when i knew he wanted to damage my self esteem, i destroy his.
ReplyDeleteA guy that has just one friend in his whole life, and he keeping that one cos he using him wella, but i later told myself that guy man is a psycho. Woman get mind marry that one oh God, women can we all look well and take our eyes off comfort? When he saw on my status my engagement ring, guy man vex that i should make it a secret till my eggs are hatched, how dare you advise me pertaining to my life, when he saw my fiance he died and woke up, cos he was hot and far better than him
But i made sure i damage the little self esteem he had before i left, and he can give one a dose but can't take it. i block the baga. Always keeping taps and trying to find out how his exes are doing, is that human? till tomorrow i still feel i was jazz, cos my sis begged and cried but one day it cleared from my eyes
Na wa
DeleteWay to go!
DeleteBefore they crush U, target their self esteem...
All these women be forming angel on SDK blog, well na una get the blog.lols
DeleteThis is the style I'm using on the idiot that made me almost lose my mind. Quietly but surely eroding his self esteem. The things I went through with him. Chai!a gifted liar. The lies my people... the lies. Just unbelievable. Extremely deceptive! They are good at love -bombing their victims..make you feel so loved up ehn, you'll wonder why you didn't meet them earlier. After you don hook,the condescending attitudes surface.they start to talk you down. They're also experts at bad mouthing you behind your back while showering your with so much affection that if you won't suspect he's completely destroyed your image.. Talk about Judas.
DeleteThey're very manipulative and always feel entitled. They target quiet and docile women. Before I'm done, he go believe.
anon 20:44,you just described my husband, but the guy no go believe wetin I go do am.stupid mofo.
DeleteAnon 20:44, you just described my ex husband. I wish I knew on time I would have named and shamed him wella and destroyed his ego,I have left him to God sha
DeleteMy father is a narcissist. My mum and I are presently unemployed, but I pray for her to get a job so she can be too busy or away.
ReplyDeleteI'm married to one now, and I'm loosing my mind... God!dude is worse than the devil...
ReplyDeletePlease na, drop lil details, make we dey learn. We re all family here oo!
DeleteI'm married to one too and losing my mind too.
DeletePlease, for those men who are too proud to seek help, how can it be managed? Divorce is really a long and hard thing to do when you have kids.
Just love them like that, love them unconditionally...
DeleteThat's the only way it can be managed, they re God's children too, not outcasts!
Therapy can barely change a narcissist because they think they are perfect so they don't think that they have problems that need to be changed.
DeleteThe best thing is to seperate for a while, clear your head and get your self esteem back.
If you can't divorce or seperate, here's some suggestions
1. If you are an empathic person, stop showing them that side of you. If you are emotional, never show them your emotions anymore. They feed off of your emotions and if they don't see emotions, they have little power over you.
2. 'Yes' them to death. Anything they say, agree with them, no quarrel or fight. If the situation no favour you, you do your own thing. But at the point where they are giving order or trying to argue, your answer should always be a subtly sarcastic "yes, you're right". The whole point is to mess with their head.
3. Mirror their actions back to them. Draw them in and then push them back out without warning. Let them now be the ones seeking your approval, but never give it to them fully. Be a loving wife one minute and the next minute, be stoic and bland. Like I said before, you're messing with their head.
4. Don't ever let them make you feel guilty about anything. Their stock in trade is to make you continually question yourself whether you are right or wrong, whether you are sane or insane. Take that power away from them.
5. If you love your husband, you need to keep that love and 'obi ebere' one side for now. Because a narcissist cannot truly love you, the only person they can love is themselves.
By the time you finish messing with them, they will either be begging you for peace or they will be begging you to dissolve the marriage. You will now choose the one you want. By then you might not even want to be with him anymore.
For all this to be effective though, you need to have your own money and source of income so that you are not at his mercy for anything. Also you need to reclaim your self esteem cos I know by now you most probably have low esteem.
Caveat : some narcissists are actually crazy and can kill or maim you when they see that their actions don't affect you anymore. If you're dealing with that type, your only option is to run very far away from them.
Good comment 👍
DeleteMy sister was a narc with bipolar issues plus anger problems
DeleteAdaBekee, you are sooooooo right. I am a strong woman and didn't allow him take my self esteem. God pass am
DeleteI had the misfortune of meeting one a dating him for a few months...i had to give myself brain and disengage.He turned everyone against me while pretending we were all good.Lying,pretending manipulator.Once you notice the signs pls walk and never look back because it never ends well.
ReplyDeleteYeah my ex and former friend sure rocks. He was so good at it and very subtly until I change am for am. He didn't know what hit him. Stalked me for years until I threatened a legal suit and he knows I would follow through, that's why he stopped.As for my former friend, karma got her. Good radiance to both.
ReplyDeleteThis is Governor Amosun. He used to call his Commisioners and Perm Sec no brain
ReplyDeleteChurchill is on this table. I see Tonto as a victim cos no one believes her. They drive you made in secret and act all cool in public
ReplyDeleteOMG!! Anon, did you read my mind? As I was reading this, his name kept coming to mind...Tonto may have her issues but that guy is such a narcissist. I don't wish his type of person on my enemy. Tueh!
DeleteGbam
DeleteUnfortunately, no personality disorder can be cured, all 10 of them. They can only be managed, because people presenting with them do not know or agree that they have a problem. If you are with a true Narcissist (not just someone who is difficult), they will never change. Unless you can live with it, just walk away .
ReplyDeleteNarcissism is different from Narcissistic Personality Disorder. The latter involves delusions and paranoia.
ReplyDeleteGod continue to protect me from narcissists. I’m now more aware of them and can sometimes see red flags early, though I’m still a learner.
Run from them, they are emotional vampires.
Living with a sibling with NPD and mother with BPD a narc father, brother with sociopathic tendencies and a sister that is bipolar
DeleteSigh
It is well
LOL any 18:23 dooooooo
DeleteWow Anon!!!
DeleteSo u'r the only normal one in ur family?
DeleteI dated one, he almost made me loose my self esteem, Chai thank God the whole thing ended before it became too late for me
ReplyDeleteFrom all I've read,I think my husband has the traits of a narcissist but his is not extreme and I've learnt to ignore him and agree with him on any issue. Even if it's wrong. Another thing is he can't leave his comfort zone.
ReplyDeleteThey don't have Joy and they don't expect you to have Joy too... cruel people,I know and I have them
ReplyDeleteThis definition fits a sadist more than a narcissist. A narcissist is a person who is so self-absorbed that everything has to be about them. The live in this fantasy world where they have an excessive sense of entitlement and every other person's life ought to revolve around them. They suffer delusions of grandeur and crave constant praise and admiration. When they bully, it's usually not necessarily to make their target feel bad, rather it makes them feel good running others down because they couldn't care less of how others feel. They have an inflated sense of their self-worth. It's all about them and less about others.
ReplyDeleteThe term originated from a Greek mythology where a hunter named Narcissus saw his reflection in a pool of water and fell madly in love with his reflection. If I remember correctly, he was some kind of hot shot, incredibly handsome and well built that both men and women made advances at him and he kept turning them down with disdain because he felt they weren't worthy. One of the men he rejected placed a curse from the gods on him that he would love only himself. So one day as he was walking by a pond or pool of water, he looked in and saw the most handsome being which happened to be his reflection but he didn't know. He stayed on that spot for days pinning away, wanting the affections of his own reflection all to no avail. He finally killed himself because he couldn't get the "man in the mirror". Like most Greek mythologies, there are several versions of this story. Oh! How I love Greek mythology.
It's from this myth that the great psychoanalyst Sydmond Freud coined the term "narcissism" to describe the disorder where people are extremely self-absorbed and feels the world revolves around them.
Sigmund.
DeleteHi Ronalda
Na when they meet my type dem go see cure by force.
ReplyDeleteHmm, I married one that made sure I lost my self-esteem. I am trying to pick up the remaining pieces of my shattered life and then comes another version who doesn't care about anybody but himself, he doesn't admit he is wrong in anything, talks me down at all time, not minding he is not even working, I kuku looked at myself in the Mirrow and told myself girl you can't go through this again so the earlier you get rid of him the better, sharp sharp I blocked him.
ReplyDelete