Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative....

Advertisement

Advertisement - Mobile In-Article

Monday, December 09, 2019

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative....

Na wah!!!!...........







STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
THE ENEMY AT THE WORK PLACE



Dear BVs
I work with a cooperate firm for more than two years now and there is this particular Lady that since day one I won't call it dislike I will use the word HATE .....SHE HATES ME.

Everyone in the office knows that my presence irritates her, I have called her aside on different occasions to ask if I have done anything to her she won't say anything, I have also talked to my boss boss about it, he promised to talk to her and since then she has reduced it but recently it all started again, because of the often embarrassment I decided not to be involved in whatever convo she is in and the nature of our job I can't avoid her.


she does the opposite to other colleagues, I am just trying to wrap my head around the whole thing cause it is really weighing my job down, she attends to my stuffs on a scale 2/10. And if I confront her just know that throughout that period I am in for it like she wont attend to any of my work till she is satisfied.

when she sees any of the boss around she will begin to smile with me by bringing up one gist or the other, it annoys the hell out of me,
Guys I really don't know what to do, how do I get to let her to at least tell me what I did to her since I started working in that
 office.



*You didnt say the age difference....
Is it possible she is jealous? or dating one of the Bosses and she sees you as a threat?I dont know what to make of this situation.
Regards.

59 comments:

  1. I dont know why people see there place of work as a family reunion.
    Why can't you just act like she doesn't exist and let it be just work.

    I wish you can be like me sha
    My matter tire dem for office.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Didnt you read where she said the kind of work she does she cant avoid her???

      Delete
    2. Madam there is a big difference from being “official in approach “ and being sociable at work. She is being sociable and that is giving the nitwit d guts to destroy her spirit
      Nwanne. Bone face, push her files to her, avoid eye contacts wen asking questions, b firm but not Rude, stop opening teeth if she is involved in any convo, shebi u know how shyt Dey smell? Treat her as such anytime u see her coming ur way! Poka face.

      Delete
    3. @Bbjac what Big Banty is saying that she should not care about someone not liking you but handle your job in a professional manner..after all na work she come there come do..My dear poster learn to treat people like they dont exist, learn to ignore and you will really enjoy your job..I dont get why some ladies are so antagonistic to their fellow lady..na wa oh..Thank God I have a male boss..

      Delete
    4. I agree with you. If work doesn't get done, let the management know the file has been on her table since. e wo l'oshi gan. Give it to her hot hot jare

      Delete
    5. She needs to always cc' her reporting boss on all emails and correspondence, that way you can be sure your work will be done on time. Don't ask for anything verbally. Pray and becareful, recheck whatever she's giving you to avoid stories that touch.

      Delete
    6. You do realize that your work should actually be like a “family reunion” since that is where you spend 80% of your year ? And your colleagues should actually be your “friends and family “?

      Delete
    7. Thank u for this response. Just do your work well and go home. Must you be sociable with everyone?
      Your duty is to deliver in your tasks diligently and let your work speak for you.

      Delete
  2. she might be intimidated by you hence hating you for no reason..don't force things with her,even though you can't avoid her give her space and stop asking her what you did wrong. Moreover report her in your prayers

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I have been there. She is a bully and will not stop till she kills the last of self esteem or confidence you have. In fact the more it affects you the worse it gets. I saw hell! Cried, dialogued, complained till I became a recluse in the office! She enjoyed sobbing and humiliating me till gradually others started treating me like that. One day I sat back in the office in my cubicle crying and my bos came in and shouted at me. He said I should better toughen up and stand up to her or watch all my energy get drained by her insecurities.

      Nne, na so o, I gradually became immune to her till I came to a point of trully feeling sorry for all her inadequacies I have magnified in my mind. Guess what? It started getting at her o. I became too nice to her like she was a destitute and I was better than her. One day this girl got frustrated and slapped me right in the office because I smiled and shook my head at her attitude. There and there HR got involved but her pride didn't even let her appologise and she resigned o! Honestly I was willing to let go but something just came over her and she resigned in less than 30minutes!

      Just put her in your prayers. Pray for good for her and look for any short coming she might have and direct your prayers and energy there. She will either change or destroy herself.

      Delete
  3. A lot of people hates others for no reason.. If u r a believer, it's cos d Spirit of God in u disturbs her demons hence d hatred..just pray n commit everything in God's hands,do ur work well & don't bother about her..she will be transferred soon

    ReplyDelete
  4. She could be seeing you as a competition or rival. Jealousy could not be far fetched.

    You can confide in any of your colleagues she is free with you can trust to find out.
    Some folks are like that, even hating the land you walk on.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Can you please face the work you're collecting salary for & shift your focus from getting someone who is not even paying the said salary, to like you? You're giving yourself sleepless nights over something that's not even the problem. I thought you were going to ask how to get a jealous colleague to do her job where you're concerned. But no, you're here crying like a little girl that's being ignored in the playground.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly..You think about how she can stop denying your job..Who liking help..

      Delete
  6. This is a temptation to hate and you should not get trapped in it.
    When once I experienced workplace toxicity, this was what I did;
    It was her birthday, and I bought a brand new phone and gave to her (had
    heard her complain that her phone was giving her problems).
    She was instantly disarmed and in tears.
    Romans 12:17Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. 18If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” d says the Lord. 20On the contrary:

    “If your enemy is hungry, feed him;

    if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.

    In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.” e

    21Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My dear it does not work in all cases..There are some that have a ''reprobate mind''...Just complain to your boss about how her delayed response affects your job..Period..

      Delete
    2. @Phoenix
      You know that's the Word of God right there, don't you?
      He worked, he works and will work in all cases.
      Love never fails! 1 Corinthians 13:8

      Delete
  7. The best way to handle her is to ignore her...
    If she misbehaves act like you did not notice.
    She sees you keep giving her bad attitude attention
    I notice when you tend to ignore people they tend to start looking for your attention

    ReplyDelete
  8. You are greatly worried about a colleague?
    What exactly does she do for you that is getting you so worried?
    Avoid her at all cost, don't be friendly with her.
    Since you already spoke to her one on one and has refused to losen up, let her be and focus on your job.
    Anytime you take your stuff to her and she treats it Shabily, report her to your boss.
    Even if she's older than you, she has no right to treat you in that manner. Ignore her straight up and make her feel uncomfortable with your attitude. You know how you make someone feel worthless... Like that.


    Sluttychic.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you baby Girl..Poster enough of all these...You are an adult, do your job and go home knowing fully well that you did your best...You better report to your boss and put it in a mail, no verbal conversations oh...You need evidence in black and white...

      Delete
    2. Reporting won't stop anything, what if another boss is appointed, will she continue to report.she needs to be smart, reverse psychology. Treat her nicely, ignore her tantrums, send whatever you via mail, and put a big smile on your face. She'll get tired, enemies arise when you decide to be one, you have the power to ignore.

      Delete
  9. What to do?

    Romans 12:17Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. 18If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” d says the Lord. 20On the contrary:

    “If your enemy is hungry, feed him;

    if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.

    In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.” e

    21Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

    Give her exactly what she needs;
    if hungry = give her food
    if thirsty = give her water

    Result =you send fire into her conscience and she will be won over.

    Look into her life and find out what she needs that you can give, as much as lies within you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Story, in this life not every body is gonna like you, some people will hate you for no reason at all, even and especially if you go all out to please.
      Ignore her abeg, what do you need her likeness for? Do you know tgerr are some people that like you for no reason at all, you have probably never talked to them but they like you anyway. Forget her inugo

      Delete
  10. My dear, go ghetto on her, confront her and damn the consequences, I would have advised you to quit your job but I think that's what she's gunning for, so I'll suggest you go ghetto on her, reciprocate the hate she has for you or completely ignore her.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Poster please double ignore Iya Nimi's advice.

      Delete
  11. OP, sometimes your accomplishments, personality and other characteristics remind people of what they are lacking.. it could be beauty, vibrancy, etc.

    First of all, you need spiritual energy to fight workplace enemies. Take it to God in prayer.

    Focus on your work and don't let her bad energy get in the way of your career. Record everything she does to you just incase..it can come in handy, and only ever respond in an articulate manner no matter how much she riles you up.

    Lastly, keep doing what you do cos clearly you are doing something right if it has her hot and bothered.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Poster please and please I REPEAT DOCUMENT EVERYTHING IN BLACK AND WHITE..Send mail reminders and copy the copyables...Dont give room for her to destroy your career...No verbal conversations with her...

      Delete
  12. @poster,we have wicked, rude and mannerless people like that in every organization. Since she's not your employer abeeg press ignore button. Anytime you give her stuff to do for you if she likes let her take 100yrs to do it for you,don't bother yourself. Their type of people are best killed with silence treatment. Pretend as if she doesn't exist. Don't laugh, gist or rapport with her. Treat her like a non existing human being. Turn the table around 360 on her,sharply. I dealt with one in my place of work. By the time I was through with her She started telling people that I have a strong heart. Even greetings self na from far distance. Who get time for nonsense?

    ReplyDelete
  13. If she snubs you, snub her as well. I hate rubbish. Is she the paying your Salary? Stop respecting, put her where she belong and watch her mellow down..haba!

    ReplyDelete
  14. She DOES NOT HAVE TO LIKE YOU! Yes I am shouting. Everyone has noticed but don't have a problem with it. You have to handle this in a mature way or else you will look like you are a complainer and moaner. People like that you IGNORE. No socialisation, zero contact, even eye contact sef. Treat her respectfully when you have to work with her, especially in front of witnesses. When she starts her fake jokes just smile and divert attention back to work matters. ANY official dealings with her put in writing and print our emails to keep. She does not have to lie but she does have to work with you. She also does not have to give 100% to anything concerning you but just make sure you cover your own ass. Keep a diary ad document every thing you do with her. People like that can be dangerous. You will win by being professional and being 10 steps ahead of her.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. God bless you..follow this advice...

      Delete
  15. If she delays your work just keep reporting her,thats all.And avoid her like shit when she's not handling any work related stuff

    ReplyDelete
  16. Grow a thick skin and ignore her. Do as if she doesn't exist.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Pray for her. Believe me, it works. Something would just happen and there would be a turn around.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Poster, you don't have to be weighed down by her cold attitude towards you. Just relate to her in a formal and professional way. You came to work differently and you have different purposes.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Focus on your work and keep things strictly professional. If she's making your work difficult either by procrastinating or doing a shabby job, report the matter to your boss. Don't think about how it affects her because she wouldn't think twice about you.

    Also, do not gossip about her with anyone in the office. Keep things strictly professional. You're there to make money and move up career wise.

    Also, be careful how you leave things you eat and drink in the office. Such a person may have a diabolic mind. Just saying.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Send email....
      Never get tired sending when she make personal stuffs affect work.

      Just send the kind reminder kind of message and copy the copyables😁

      Delete
  20. Maybe is jealous of you, please ignore her and face your work,office is not place of family get together,mind your work.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Report her case to God by going for three-day fasting and prayer, white fasting.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Why are you so bothered about your colleague at work, why do you want her to like you, is she your boss or the one paying your salary?
    Look here, face your work and stop feeding her with attention, I wonder why you're acting like a baby, seeking for attention at work instead of you to face your work and let her be the one looking out to have a chat with you.
    Do your work and go home to your family instead of looking for a colleague to treat you in a certain way. She knows she's getting at you and that's why she won't stop till you ignore her completely

    ReplyDelete
  23. This one na small matter o, Poster. How old are you, sef?? Person wey you go use ignore button and Spiritual warfare finish. Do not joke with anything that outs food on your table, take it seriously. My dear, by the time you go finish with am, she go dey find you, she no go see you. Try as much as possible to be more professuonal in the office environment. Best of luck.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Possibly, she sees you more as a rival, avoid her as much as you can, some people can hate you even when you've done nothing to them... please be strong

    ReplyDelete
  25. Sweetie, hard fact? Some people are going to despise no matter what. Some may not even know why, some may know but would never reveal the reason, not to you anyway. One pertinent lesson I have learnt is, you can't control how people feel about you but you can, to a large degree, control your reaction to how they act.

    You know what is curiously ironic about your situation? The colleague you complain of is actually not as dangerous as the ones "kiki-ing" and acting like they've got your back but in actuality, they can't wait to plunge a knife in back and twist it while at it. Those are the real people you should dread, not "missy" who lets you know she can't stand you. At least you know where you stand with her. Like Cornelius Vanderbilt said "I am not afraid of my enemies, but by God, you must look out when you get among your friends." The real person you should watch out for may be the one you share lunch with.

    I know it doesn't feel good to be "hated", I totally understand, my darling, especially when there's no justification for that. However, come to terms with it and try your best to ignore her actions. As long as she can be civil, she need not be cordial. You are there to work and earn your coins. Giving her the satisfaction of knowing that she's getting under your skin, is the fuel she needs to become nastier. Do you know you can turn the tables by acting like you can't even be bothered to notice whether she's naughty or nice? Do you know how frustrating it is when the person you want to make miserable doesn't even act like you exist?

    Don't act like she's an enemy by being icy or salty. No frowning, no hostile facial gestures, just act like she's a poorly crafted figurine occupying space at the office. Keep it classy by saying hello when you come in in the morning, then keep it moving. When you have to meet her for whatever reason, keep your expression vacant, get the job done like a professional. When you ignore people who like mischief, they will start doing everything to get your attention. Luckily for you, the work place isn't primarily for social networking and bonding. It's good if your colleagues are friendly, it certainly makes work easier but when that isn't the case, you must adapt to your present reality. Don't jeopardize your job because one person is acting weird. I don't think she's worth the drama.
    e-hugs and kisses.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Well, your story is kind of similar to mine. Just that in my own case, she smiles with me, tries to have conversations because she is looking for information. I never gave her the opportunity. The only conversation I respond to is if it is work related. She goes behind my back to speak I'll of me and whenever I achieve anything, she is never happy. She bosses everyone around except me cos I never let her. If she does anything to me and I don't like, unlike others, I tell her right there so somehow, she has gotten the .message that I am not a pushover and she is respecting my space now. I don't like bullies.

    ReplyDelete
  27. I've been here before. Trust me, the issue isnt you. It's her. You probably remind her of someone she dislikes, or shes jealous of you for one reason or another or she sees you as a threat.

    This is what you can do:
    1. Do not entertain conversations with her. If she tries to make conversation when the boss is around, let her ask you the question twice. Most times if shes being ignored the boss will intervene. Then ask her in the boss's presence: oh wow! I'm surprised you're talking to me now because everyone in this office knows why we dont talk. Is it because oga 'John' is around? Dont say it in a quarrelsome tone, say it with a huge smile on your face. Then turn back to whatever it is you were doing and dont wait for her response. She will try to defend herself but ignore and dont say another word. That way she wont try that stunt again.

    2. If she is slowing down your work, send a reminder mail and copy your supervisor. Have NO verbal communication with her especially regarding work. Always keep it documented so that whenever you escalate anything, you have proof of delays etc.

    3. Dont give her attention by asking her what you did or didnt do. You make her feel too important. The issue is with her and if she cant say she cant say. Period.

    4. Whenever shes talking to a colleague, just pass all of them. Dont get involved in the conversation no matter how tempted you are.

    5. Dont be confrontational or reactive, ensure you're passive aggressive cos that's what suits her. Keep the smile on your face like a sticker and never ever raise your voice when speaking to her.

    Good luck

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I which I had read this when one kemi at PwC was frustrating me. I stupidly asked her what I did and since then she knew that i cared and continued . Glad someone else frustrated her too out of that office. This people are wicked, can pretend and extremely jealous pple

      Delete
  28. In the end, know that God puts such people in our midst to keep us on our toes. That means, you too cant delay anyone's work or give an attitude to anyone else because you would be doing what you are accusing her of. So you have to be on your beat behaviour and meet all your deadlines so that everyone will know that that's not your real character and it's just a mask you put up to manage her excesses.

    You dont need to be friends with her or anyone else.

    ReplyDelete
  29. I think she is in love with you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

      Delete
  30. For those quoting scripture, it's not about paying evil for evil. It's about drawing the line at abuse. Every one has a sense of self and dignity which they must protect or else people will turn you into a doormat. No one can bully me o. I don't bully either. But I know how to hold my ground. Like BVs said, ignore her and be completely self-reliant; where you need her input, be professional. Do't act agressive or passive agressive, just focus on your self and your work ...oh and others. Make sure you chat with others and show that you can maintain friendly relations with other reasonable human beings. If you want, you can pray for her because truth is what is doing her has nothing to do with you...You're just the weak scapegoat she has decided to take it out on. One of my colleagues in my office would wake up in the morning and keep malice for no reason. Me too, I go keep my face one side. When she gets tired and makes attempt to resume normal conversation, then I will extend it by a few days to show her that no be only her fit give silent treatment. She don dey reduce the attitude small small. Some people only understand the language they themselves speak and sometimes you have to speak that language. Am I making sense?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 100 million 😘 for this comment.

      Delete
  31. Pls is the lady's name kemi a former PwC staff. Fake and wicked pple

    ReplyDelete

Disclaimer: Comments And Opinions On Any Part Of This Website Are Opinions Of The Blog Commenters Or Anonymous Persons And They Do Not Represent The Opinion Of StellaDimokoKorkus.com

Pictures and culled stories posted on this site are given credit and if a story is yours but credited to the wrong source,Please contact Stelladimokokorkus.com and corrections will be made..

If you have a complaint or a story,Please Contact StellaDimokoKorkus.com Via

Sdimokokorkus@gmail.com
Mobile Phone +4915210724141