Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: A Man's Burden As Baby Daddy...

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Wednesday, January 08, 2020

A Man's Burden As Baby Daddy...

He is in a relationship with a Lady that is headed nowhere and the next thing she does is to get pregnant and he tells her he does not want the baby but she goes ahead to have the baby and he disappears from her life.....






Should a man be held responsible for a baby he didnt want ? We have a lot of situations like this going on now in the lives of a lot of men...What is your take on this?

55 comments:

  1. Of course he should be held responsible for his ejaculation into the wrong hole. It takes two to tango.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Did he force "the hole" open to ejaculate? Did he rape the silly girl?
      When a lady admits a penis into that her hole, has she not signed on for a 9 months journey?
      If the man is not married to her, that's her defense to play.
      How many men are looking for ladies to sleep with in order to marry them or care for babies?

      Delete
    2. What happens to using a condom.

      Delete
  2. For the sake of the innocent child involved, he should show concern and do right by the child.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. When a woman does not want a child she knows what to do to prevent it. Why is it that men who does not want a child hardly takes steps to prevent it?

      If a woman wants the child and the man did a Vasectomy, will the woman succeed? Wear condom nko? No o.

      Delete
  3. Yes, a man should be responsible for the baby he WANTED. You show you don’t want a baby by the actions you take ‘before’ conception, not after. The man should have refrained from sex or used protection to prevent a baby happening. It’s irresponsible to put that responsibility solely on the woman, it shows some form of entitlement that shouldn’t be encouraged.
    And then they go further to ask the woman to abort? Like there aren’t dangers to aborting? Or like the woman doesn’t go through physical and emotional stress as a result of aborting? Pls, since both liked it raw, they should stew in their mess.

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  4. How did she get pregnant? Did she steal his sperm? If you don't want a baby, use a condom. She can't get pregnant on her. Use a protection you can trust not on the assumption that she's on pill or will take after pill.

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  5. Yes, he should be held responsible.
    If you know you are not headed anywhere with her, use protection or stay celibate till you are ready to be married.
    Alot of men ended up with women they really didn't want to be with because they were trapped with pregnancy. As time goes on, these men get tired of their wives and start to keep sidechicks.

    Sluttychic.

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  6. Women always at the receiving end!..
    How much is postpill bikonu?...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Queen and Boss, you're welcome.
      Good to have you back.
      The difference BTW you and Anj is that you drop your comment straight on and you're real like that, but your wannabe is ouuuccvhhh** talking off point, making gibberish ajujune'se okwu or whatever that means, and quick to shoot others she accuses of shooting her.
      Please coach her well to be polite in this SDK family.
      Anj, no one hates you but learn to drop your comment and face front. Stop thinking yourself to be a celeb or holier than the pope. Leave Nigerian girls alone bcos you're one by citizenship.

      Delete
  7. This has no wrong or right answers after pregnancy. If the woman that opened leg without protection can take it, then she should bear the consequences for laying with an irresponsible fool.

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  8. If he doesn't want a baby, he should not do things that will produce babies, as far as he is sexually active, he should be able to take care of the baby..
    If you don't want baby, then don't have sex, as simple as that..

    ReplyDelete
  9. People just want to have fun with no atom of responsibility. Sex was created to be within the confines of marriage, we say ‘No, we can’t wait that long or I am not ready for marriage stress’. Okay, use protection, ‘No, I like it raw’. Okay, deal with the baby that has materialized, ‘No, abeg kill it jare’. No desire to take on any responsibility whatsoever.
    Yeah, few times protection fails, but that’s not what we are talking about.
    We have to realize we can’t know better than our Creator. We also have to understand certain actions come with responsibilities, grow up!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Why should a man be in a relationship with someone and very well knows the relationship is going no where, but keeps going.
    Why have sex with some one you don't want to have anything with.
    Why have unprotected sex? Seriously UNPROTECTED SEX, with a supposedly random person.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Protected sex is not a guarantee that a pregnancy would not occur.

      Abstinence is 100% effective

      Delete
    2. So how about the sexual need?

      Be talking like saints meanwhile these are depression inducing teachings that deny human basic needs.

      Teach people on safe sex and empowerment in case they decide to keep the baby and if not, abortion is valid so they don't birth a child they would never love or cater for.

      No matter what, sex is a basic adult human need.

      Delete
  11. At 15, my mum told me when you are of age ,date only girls that are good enough for you to spend the rest of your life with. This is exactly what l did. I have never had sex with a girl l am not emotionally involved with you. When your prick control your existence be decent enough to accept the consequences. If my 22 year old imprenates a girl he must accept responsibility. If for whatever reason he refuses l will ensure the child is well cared for after a DNA test

    Alexander

    ReplyDelete
  12. very funny.. even the rich man whose sperm was used by the hotel attendant without his knowledge or consent wasn't spared in the court of law then one guy somewhere who isn't ready to father a child will be diving/riding without appropriate protection/helmet and turn around to start complaining when he gets the result of his actions.
    People should learn to be responsible for their actions.

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  13. Make una go dey carry belle thinking one man Will fund una lifestyle.... I pity una in advance cos na only dis blog we go judge am after that case closed na u go suffer am

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  14. This happens a lot in marriages. The couple can agree to have 2 or 3 kids only, then the lady gets pregnant (intentionally or unintentionally).
    Some husbands ask for abortion and when the woman refuses, they refuse to train the child.
    So you see some husbands paying the fees for 2 out of 3 kids, leaving the unwanted one for the mother to train alone.
    Women somehow always bear the brunt of the aftermath of sex, that is why you must make sure your partner is ALWAYS on the same page with you.
    Refuse to have sex without protection with a man that is not ready to be a father because unfortunately we are in a country where the law has not finished mandating divorced fathers to pay custody fees, talk more of baby daddies.
    Yes a man should ultimately be held responsible for his child whether wanted or not, however, it is always better to err on the side of caution. Stay protected ladies!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't think this scenario of the married couple you painted applies here. Stella is referring to a woman who's not married to the man in question. In your case, both husband and wife are responsible for the number of children they have.

      Delete
  15. A lot of women r scared of D&C , a lot age has catch up with them, others go in for selfish reasons!
    If a man cannot LOVE ur child more than u, pls terminate! Terminate! Terminate!!
    Mine different o! I wanted a man who will love my child. As Jehova will allow it, he came with a mission to shoot down, age no Dey my side. As Oga fire once belle. Annoying human I wanted to terminate but all hell was let lose! Na so I born o! Everyday he is present in his life.

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  16. Married men usually tell chics dey want more children, dey later bail on her when madam finds out. They all say :she seduced me, it wasnt anything serious, she trapped me

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    Replies
    1. The ladies should be smart enough not to have relationships with married men or men in committed relationship. I can understand if a man lies about his commitment status, but majority of the time, the other woman is fully aware or if she becomes aware after the relationship has started, she remains in it

      Delete
  17. Their head is not correct (baby daddies)
    They want to play safe in the line of fire, it doesn't work that way gents.
    So the ladies should be constantly risking their Wombs and lives.

    ReplyDelete
  18. I'm a lady but to be honest, i'm divided over this issue.

    A lady sleeps with a man with full knowledge that the man is just with her for sex but she chooses to deliberately get pregnant with the intention of either coercing the man into marrying her or getting his money via child support. Seems to me they would win either way as society expects the man to take responsibility.

    If you agree that a woman has the 100% right to choose to keep or to abort the baby, the man should be able to choose whether or not he wants to be involved in the child's life. If he chooses not to be involved, he should have no access to the child or future reward from the child.

    However, the child is a separate innocent individual who would grow up wanting to know his father. He/she should not suffer for what is not his/her fault.

    Abstinence is key to avoid all these drama.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Here is the thing, the men entice the females with everything just for a lay, and the ladies in return wants to keep the enticements coming, it is a rough path, as there is no middle ground.
      The one that really pokes me is when the ladies, starts calling the men "dead beat" how ?

      Delete

  19. You shld only have unprotected sex with someone you know you can marry. If in your mind you know it's a fling always strap up.
    I know a guy who already did introduction with someone,then his side Chick who didn't know of the fiancees existence got pregnant with twins. Side-Chick family brought down fire he still refused to marry her but is taking care of the kids very well. He begged the fiance for 2yrs and she took him back and they are married now.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Has the wife had kids of her own? She's still not safe unless baby mama gets married o.

      Baby mama and her family will still be trying to get to him. Two kids for him and you think they have given up? His family will take his side.

      And there's an Okafor's law. Unless the man sets the right boundaries sha.

      Delete
  20. Then how do we discourage the current practice of a woman deliberately getting pregnant for a man because of his social status or wealth?

    Many young girls are using this as a poverty elevation program, to get an edge over their perceived rival i.e. the man's "main chick", fiancee or wife, or to be connected to a man for life when he's not interested

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. deliberately getting pregnant? you are talking bunkun. did he sleep without protection? if yes then he has no excuse. stella what does a child he did not want mean? does he not know that when sperm and egg jam fertilization fit happen. abeg men should stop the bullshit this 2020, if you want no commitment or babies always insist on protection. if the girl is desperate and your dick is not desperate you will insist on a condom or morning after pill. enough of irresponsible men coming to run their mouths and face the consequences of their actions. poster whether you like hide under the rock or go to mars, its your sperm your child. if you did not want any permanent ties to her u would have put your dick in check except you are saying she drugged you and fucked you..abeg i dey vex

      Delete
    2. Am sitting on this table. Am a single mom of 1, am 37 I want to have another baby my divorced man friend told me he is not interested in re marrying but he gives us all we ask plus we live in one of his houses with his sister in another flat. I don't know what to do and I don't want to have a baby that won't be loved or people will say I got pregnant because of what he has and who he is and I want another child as age is not on my side

      Delete
    3. He won't even agree on sleeping with using protection

      Delete
    4. But there are men who use pregnancy to trap women. In some cases, to ruin their reputation knowing they won't abort. Girls are not the only ones who do this. I once had a case where the guy deliberately put holes in the condom to make the girl pregnant because he feared she would leave him. Babe didn't believe in abortion. That's how he got her to marry him.

      Delete
  21. A man should be held responsible for knowingly sleeping with a woman without using protection. There's no two ways about it!

    You don't want unwanted pregnancy, use protection since you can't stay without sexual intercourse.

    Women should also learn to cover their legs or demand that the men use protection.
    It is a woman that carries pregnancy, struggle in the delivery room and birth a child. We only get pregnant when and if we want to.

    Pregnancy is the last thing I am scared of in this life when it comes to sex. So many deadly diseases and infections.

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  22. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  23. I think a law should be made and enforced that for two individuals UNMARRIED TO EACH OTHER, a man who refuses responsibility must be made to sign a document that declares that he's not the father of the child unless it can be established that there was an agreement between both parties for a pregnancy to occur or if they were in a committed relationship.

    Not only will signing such a document deny him of any present and future benefits from the child, it would also discourage young ladies who intend to use pregnancy to trap men from doing so as they lose out legally whatever financial or emotional benefits they were hoping to get.

    I think this would make both parties more responsible as the man would need to think deeply before signing such a document and the lady would see no benefit in getting pregnant for a man who's not planning a future with her.

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  24. It definitely takes two to tango.

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  25. It takes two to tangle abeg, if the man is not ready why not wear simple condom to prevent pregnancy.
    He should take responsibilities of the innocent baby.

    ReplyDelete
  26. I am not going to attend this pity party.
    If you as a girl spreads legs for men, be ready to bear the consequences.
    A lot of these girls are too greedy that they do that to get him to marry them
    which is a deception. If the man wants to marry you, what he does is to propose and pay
    bride price before talking about sex.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. does a man not taking responsibility negate the fact he has the child's DNA? why do they come with their tails between their legs years later to claim child? not every woman wants marriage, just accept you are the owner of the child and be financially responsible, period. any man man who denies a child, planned or not is IRRESPONSIBLE, SIMPLE

      Delete
    2. Baby Oku
      This your view is why a lot of ladies are serial baby mamas everywhere.
      You are wiser than the only wise God that created sex to be within marriage and says that
      he will judge the adulterers and sexually immoral?
      Your name says it all.

      Delete
    3. Thank God am very wise and my name is baby oku cos am hot and proud of it .....the issue here is not whether sex is good outside marriage. the issue here is WHEN PREGNANCY HAPPENS PLANNED OR UNPLANNED SHOULD THE GUY RESPONSIBLE? so because a guy is not ready for commitment, he has sex without protection, pregnancy happens and he refuses to take responsibility. in case you have not noticed from my post, i am old school cos i no be small pickin and i can never be in support of just being a baby mama. yes we preach abstinence but sex for young people these days is just a reality that we have to deal with. another reality you should know is not everybody wants marriage. am married 14 years counting but am not unmindful that some other women do not mind just having their babies even for married men or those in already committed relationships.. what we are saying is people should learn that if you indulge in indiscriminate sex without protection then a baby can happen. and when it happens, planned or not you must be responsible for its attendant responsibilities and effects good or bad...

      Delete
  27. Sex is a responsibility. Why play with someone's daughter then ask her to 'abort?' Is abortion not as painful as childbirth? What if she dies in the process? What if her womb gets damaged who will marry her? What if that is the only child she would ever have?That is wickedness. And to imagine such idiots return years later to cunningly beg for forgiveness just to lay claims to their 'aborted' sperm. Nemesis is real. If lots of barren and women who miscarry have any idea of the root of the pain and shame in their marriage, they would quit. Men think they can just chop and clean mouth but them no know say sex na snare that can be positive or negative. Never, ever take advantage of even the smallest woman because the tears and pain of a woman is powerful and can make or destroy anyone that has ever laid on her especially the 'smart' hit and run guys.

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  28. He should simply protect and guide his fluid selflessly. Don't share you sperm with any lady you don't have feelings for and most importantly don't sow if you are not ready to reap.

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  29. Why will a man be in a relationship and having sex when he knows it's going nowhere? No matter the protection used to prevent pregnancy, all is 99% effective. Someone will be the 1% of it's failure. Why keep playing games with a woman's heart?

    2 adults should be responsible for their actions. If a man dosen't want responsibility, don't engage in sex in the first place. No excuse pls. Men, Quit the decept!

    That's why i like America. You must pay child support as long as DNA declares you the parent.

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  30. Lol..😂😂
    I dey laff oh.. I see most ladies have still not had sense in this new year.. keep thinking you can bully and force your way into a man life.. experience would teach you the hard way

    ReplyDelete
  31. The bitter pill to this tale is that when the child is all grown the father will show up with the intention of claiming ownership for a child he chose to abandon. Should the mother now outright disown the father?

    This is a case of being responsible - if a woman is pregnant why run if you could afford to foot the bills, and other responsibilities attached to it?

    Irresponsible men want the adulation of being called dads but don't want to face the responsibility of being a father. Your story up there Stella is that of Mr Irresponsible.

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  32. First off, I AM A WOMAN. Nevertheless, I believe that since intercourse was MUTUALLY AGREED on by a couple, the outcome of the intercourse should equally be MUTUALLY AGREED UPON by the COUPLE. Forcing a child on a partner is WRONG and WICKED except in a situation where the man EXPLICITLY STATED that he WANTS A CHILD FROM THAT PARTICULAR SEXUAL ENCOUNTER.

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    Replies
    1. you people just keep commenting stupidly. if he did not explicitly state he wants a child why not explicitly use a condom or ensure protection? the only foolproof way to avoid the burdens of unwanted pregnancy is abstinence..woman my foot

      Delete
  33. I will never buy into who is to be held responsible, dear ladies whatsoever happens in a relationship, good or bad, we are always at the receiving end so let's pls shine our eyes n not our toto. Enuff said. Instead of dragging one vaby daddy upandan, use that time for something meaningful

    ReplyDelete

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