What is your take on this?
Friday, January 24, 2020
Reasons Nigerian Wives Would Rather Visit Their Parents Than Their In Laws....
This topic has been viral for a few days and we decided to wade in today and read what you have to say concerning this topic....
What is your take on this?
What is your take on this?
129 comments:
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Hmmmmm......this is so true
ReplyDeleteAo true. Me i always have problems with my inlaws,thats why i hardly travel to visit. Urobho people una try. Imagine expecting the wife,to cook and serve them,and they would still be detecting for you. Annoying much.
DeleteThis is me ooo.....I always find an excuse to spend more time with my parents when I visit home. Abeg no time for unnecessary wahala with those that don't and will never accept you as family. My in-laws are the worst and I can truly now write a lesson 101 on what to look out for in your in-laws before you marry. Namsense!!!!!
DeleteAnno 12:04,biko write it oooh,so that we singles can learn oooh
DeleteThe funny thing is that these acts are done by fellow women, so who do we blame than ourselves. The daughter in law complaining today about mistreatment from her in-laws will mete out worse to her furure daughter in law. Until we stop the cycle nothing can be done.
DeleteShare your experiences
DeleteI beg to differ. Last year when I went back I didn't want to go home because I was treated like a queen at my inlaws. We the wives dont do anything at all except take care of our children
Delete@ Anonymous24 January 2020 at 11:50 my sister no be small detestation. When my urohbor mother Inlaw supposedly came to my house for omugwo she acted as if na she born the baby all she did was sit and watch TV never helped me till she left, refused to cook with the excuse that in their culture another woman no dey enter another woman kitchen, meanwhile anytime I go to ugheli na me dey cook and clean. I had to stop all the Christmas visits because na slavery I dey go do every Christmas.
DeleteIm number one on this table ...The expectation is too much ..my own people just allow me relax and bond with them
ReplyDeleteAnd you will in turn do it to your daughter's in-law tomorrow forgetting all you're padding through now
DeleteThis is my life story. Everything said up there is soooo true.
DeleteAnny 11:45 yeah that's it. They will complain today and do same tomorrow. Weren't the wicked mother inlaw of today complaining of the same thing in their time. Now they are maltreating the new iyawos
DeleteVery true
ReplyDeleteThe first time my motherin-law and 3 of my sister in-laws visited me, I taught I was in for the slaving because the 3 ladies are my husband's elder sisters by far.
DeleteI was shocked! I never saw anything like that all my years in igbo land. That my sister in-laws cooked, cleaned, scrubbed, washed and would ask me what quantity and how I want the food cooked! These are very successful women o with grown children. I married an Edo man and the kind of treatment I get with my in-laws...I can almost say is impossible in igbo land where I come from.
I have aunts that take their time to visit my grandmother just to humiliate their brother's wife and turn her to a rag. Any little thing the eldest aunt will decree the poor brothers wife must kneel down to beg her with a live chicken. She turn herself to Amadioha.
This patriarchy thing is worse off in the east.
Hmmm @ Saphire, you said nothing but the truth.
DeleteI don't think it's an igbo thing, it just a family thing some families are just mean and wicked to their daughter in-laws
DeleteRaw fact!
ReplyDeleteWell let me read comments.
ReplyDeleteThings some women go through,me i feel very comfortable in my parents house than inlaws my house will always be home for me
ReplyDeleteHmmmmmm it is well with women. Women to be treated well lies with the husband. It is what you call your wife or treat her, that is what the in-laws will take.
ReplyDeleteIf you call your wife a goat, in-laws will call her goatee. .
And what will you call your daughter's in-law?
DeleteNot always dear...some mother in-laws are so controlling and manipulative that even if your hubby is carrying you like an egg. they will still find a way to put you down and in a bad light.
DeleteNot all the time sis!!
DeleteSome in-laws can pretend to thier son to be sheep's but when he's not there.....
My husbands people tried it during my first Xmas with them. They frowned when we got there and when hubby asked why they were frowning they exploded and said I didn't come to help them. If u see how hubby screamed at them and stormed out enh, that was the last time they tried it. Wicked set of Igbo people. Suwah.
DeleteI read this yesterday.its just so on point.what most of this our in laws expect from us is really overwhelming.
ReplyDeleteWhen i was dating my husband,i made sure whenever we go to his fathers house i didnt do anything,all those unneccessary eye service,i acted like a guest that i am and when its time to leave i carry my bag,dust am dey go..ill not come and allow them use me anyhow even b4 they marry me put for house.This attitude is common amongst we the yorubas.
My prayer is to be a good inlaw to my kids spouse
So did I. I never did eye service before marriage.It is the desperate women who do these. They believethe mans family will pitch in and encourage the man to marry her as per wife material
DeleteYou're so right. I did not do eye service too and my husband warned me not to as well. There's nothing like marrying someone who cares about you just the way you care about them. My Mother-In law and my sisters in law at a point ganged up against me for just no cause but God bless my late Father in law (May God bless his soul). He stood up for me just the way my dad would have and that changed them till date. I am Igbo married to Yoruba.
DeleteI have always been that lazy wife I my mum's in law eye, she thinks i have no strength . I love it that way.
DeleteThot it was only me. I heard the advice “start as u want to finish” meaning don’t start doing eye service then vex later, so I never did eye service. They abused me but at least they sai I’ve always been like that. Na dem sabi
DeleteI think it depends on the family you are married into.
ReplyDeleteSome in-laws are not nice, they expect you to be a slave to your husband and them. After all,they paid your bride price so “they own you”
Till date, some babes stil say they would prefer to marry a man whose mother is no more...fear of being mistreated.
A lot of women do this and it’s not right. You are your husbands queen, nobody harassed you but you won’t let your own son’s wife be.
As a man, you should be very protective of your wife.
It depends on the family. My mother in-law treats me like a queen to the extent that I find it embarrassing. I will be in the sitting and gist with my father in law while my mother in law runs around trying to make me feel comfortable. I've been married to her son for 6years without a child and it breaks my heart to see how nice they are to me.
DeleteAnd the ladies that wish their mother's inoaw are no more, hope they understand they should be no more when their sons start marrying?
DeleteExactly if the man respects his wife no way his family will disrespect her..
DeleteNot always...some mother in laws are a force on their own. They live to make life uncomfortable for their daughter in laws whether your wife respects you or not.
DeleteAnon 11:34... The Lord shall bless your household with the gift of a child. In no distant time the tears will be over. Amen.
DeleteYour story really touched my heart. I am blessed with a sweet mother in law too.
@phoenix that’s not always the case all the time...my husband loves and respect me that everybody around says he is protective of me...still my MIL’s wahala isn’t from this planet, even my husband is tired of her dramas.....
Delete11.34, I found out I am preggy last week. I hereby extend this baby dust to you in Jesus name.
DeleteI will continue as anonymous for now.
👌👌👌👌
ReplyDelete👌👌👌👌
ReplyDeleteThe only time I visited my in laws to be was the day I was disqualified from marrying their son and brother. They complained that I cross my legs too much so. Instead of me to go join the others and helps in the kitchen I was watching black and white TV with them. And I was truly in love with the guy o. This guy just walked away. He just disappeared without a word. But in as much as I had a good home training I was not brought up to lick **s.
ReplyDeleteBy the time he received sense, I was already sitting comfortably on a long thing from a correct family.
I love this. I'm. Sure you would have been regretrreg marrying into that family now. I'm sure they would have been manipulating and controlling you by now.
DeleteHe was a useless guy and u would have been miserable with him. Thank God he walked away.
DeleteImagine! The family wouldn't have been your probing. The smallness of the guy would have broken you. So you come into a household for the first time and head straight for the heart-room of the family which is the kitchen. One day they will admit a witch in their kitchen without taking their time to get familiar first.
DeleteVery True.
ReplyDeletei so love my wife's step mom( mother in-law) she has be serving me special special!
ReplyDeleteDiary of a son inlaw
Ode ni e oga ade
DeleteI know sweetheart, that's why I have been using my menses blood to cook your meals... You will soon die.
DeleteThe respect a man gives to his wife in the presence of his family members determine the respect they give to her/how they treat her..
ReplyDeleteIf you as a man is a push over;they will do anything they like too..But when they know you won't tolerate any nonsense;they will think twice before they act..
If you treat your wife as a jewel;your extended would only murmur at your back..
Wisdom however is knowing What to do and when to do it without being reminded..
@MARTINS
God bless you Martins...May wisdom never leave you and your family..
DeleteGbam! I will send this to my husband coming from his fellow man.
DeleteThanks martin,all depends on how you to treat your wife in front of your family.Always treat her with respect they will respect her too
DeleteI am practically going through this situation all the time, that is why I desist from traveling to the village till my husband completes his villa house, the expectation, side comments and insults are what i refused to condone again.
ReplyDeleteI hope you will not treat your daughters'inlaw same way you said your in-laws are treating you? Stop the cycle!!!!
DeleteIf they don't like you or want you around them, stop going to visit them whether festive period or not.
DeleteI see the reason why some women are always angry especially during festive period.
Yes@11:50 the only solution to this problem is women stopping the cycle. Please women and would-be mother in laws stop the cycle.
DeleteSometimes enh the shit u guys say. Did she say she’s continuing the cycle??? Where did that come from??
DeleteVery silly anon 11:50. Grow the F up!
DeleteSome in-laws use every opportunity to oppress their wives.
ReplyDeleteIf you have been cleaning your house yourself or maybe you have helps, if you have been clearing the table yourself, wash the dishes after eating and even cook the food you eat, what stops you from doing the same thing whenever you have a visitor, be them your wives, husbands or relatives?!
Many young women are worse than their mothers. They don't only use their wives as slaves, they also stylishly (some even use force) to collect money, material things from their wives.
Abeg e, e dey wicked people body.
It's funny how this plays out. Everything written there is true. But there are exceptions,maybe in a very few African families.
ReplyDeleteBut, someone like me, I keep the same energy everywhere I go. If I don't have the strength to do anything, we all sit and gist as I never get tired of gisting and if food is the problem, I can order food. Na when I get strength to cook or run any errand I dey do so. No time to for pretence No bullshit. If I happen to have a lot of money tomorrow all these wouldn't be any problems. I go hire people to do all.
This is so true, the expectations from wives is too high, but sometimes depends on the husband, when I married my husband we once visited his elder sis and she called me to come and wash plates for other guests coming, I did it with joy but the attitude my husband's displayed that day sweet me o, after i returned to the living room he asked what I was called for I told him, immediately he shouted that so if I did not come with my wife your guests will not eat abi, I just did eye service that no baby stop it's normal he kept saying it's not normal I was Happy, another visit to this same sis inlaw she said I should enter kitchen and make the semo my husband will eat meanwhile na lie na the whole house semo I prepared. What broke the camels back was when I had misunderstanding with my husband, he got angry and said I should leave his house, I called this sis inlaw, she immediately said eeehn I am too secretive I don't call to tell her things about but now am calling her, please if the marriage will not work you people should separate abeg. Uhmmmn, well I later settled with my husband he stopped is from visiting her that she's a bad sister , that how could she tell me to leave him blablabla. That was how God settled us separately . So no more visit that I 'll be uncomfortable. And whenever I visit my family with hubby. We both don't work at all. I am happy I have peace from sis inlaw. But I still like her sha though from afar.
ReplyDeleteI was pampered and taken care of by my inlaws oh. Infact I enjoy being with them, they take the stress of me. Just that I can't pick and chose like I can do with my sisters.
ReplyDeleteExactly. My own reason is not because of chores because I would still do same chores in my own parents house or my house. Infact I have less chores to do when I visit my inlaws. Mine is the gist and aproko with my siblings finish.
DeleteNonsense
ReplyDeleteMaking a mountain out of a mole hill
How many of us ladies even know how to cook?
Hasn't social media taken all the attention.
If you go to your in-laws or your parent's house and you
are staying for days with your kids, why not go to the
kitchen and help out. At least prepare what your kids will eat?
If the food is too peppery or the kid's ration isn't what you usually
give them, the same woman will complain that she and her kids were "badly treated".
Please stop this rants, there is not War in Nigeria between women and men, it only
exist in the heads of the depraved "feminists of the Nigerian contraption". it is only
evil, exaggerated evil that Nigerian ladies copy from Americans. Visit any American
family and see that everybody will be in the backyard doing barbecue party, roasting and
eating what you joined to make and chatting. That is the joy of human association.
Wait for people to cook and serve you -queen with no kingdom.😕😕😕😕😕😕
And this same women will visit their sugar daddies or boyfriends and will go to market
and buy and cook with their own monies to impress him. 🐀🐀🐀🐀
Lmao 😂😂😂😂 you are right 💯
DeleteSome of them are practicing “wife not cook”
How many can actually prepare good meals without errror? For me, I love cooking and everywhere I go, I love to show it. It’s something that I enjoy doing. Whenever I go out of my comfort zone, I take over the kitchen.
And also, there’s a way you act and you will Ben honored.
Sure you didn’t miss the point?
DeleteSlutty .. not in all cases.
DeleteSome when you take over the kitchen they tag you as over sabi.
Some are even saying I cross leg when I go to my in laws place. Do you cross leg when you visit your parents? While they do all the work with your siblings?
DeleteShior e dey your body. For your mind you don contribute, they are talking of women who are enslaved, you are talking of something else.
Delete@ Slutty, trust me even that taking over the kitchen is enough to annoy some people.
Na wa 😂😂😂😂😂 what do humans really want? They must find a reason to fault you.
DeleteSome women are truly not finding it easy. One thing I know is that these wicked mum in-laws will not go unpunished.
Someone I know here has been out of her home for like 3 months. Just cos she asked her husband for school fees for their kids. She’s presently with her older sister and i keep encouraging her to hold on that everything will be fine. Since she’s been here, her husband hasn’t called her once. Even when heir son was sick around new year, he didn’t call. Her mum in-law is very happy the way things are. It’s well.
Sluttychic,
DeleteI am a wife not cook
No dey talk off point here
I no be slave biko
@ThatYarabachic
DeleteThen do not marry because you will cook for a lot of people, not only your husband and kids.
🐼🐼🐼🐼👩🏻🍳👩🏻🍳👩🏻🍳👩🏻🍳
@ThatYchic
DeleteYou should also tell the man that you are a wife not a mother, that you don't like giving birth.
Who is talking off point @that yoruba chic? Something is terribly wrong with you. All these internet children that don't know anything...airhead.
DeleteIn that little mind of yours, cooking is slavery? Smh. That's how some of you come here to deceive yourselves.
Sluttychic.
You're one of the sis-in-law's he talked about. Why are you so pained? Did you even read through? Aunty calm down ehn and change. Nobody is talking about being served and not going to the kitchen. No be dem dey cook for their brother to eat na. These things exist. If you check well people like you don't visit your in-laws during festive period, you go to your Father's house where you can dictate and give your brother's wives orders that you won't even tolerate from your husband's people. Let's call a spade a spade.
Delete@20:16😕😕😕
DeleteAren't you the one calling a spade a hook?
This one is close to home..... my laws dont like me for reasons best known to them. I was initially troubled by this because sincerely, I know am not a bad person but definitely not perfect. So we all travel every xmas to spend time with my parents inlaw. It is usually a terrible time, the fellow co wives & myself do a countdown of when we will return to our base. My MIL & SIL's would make sure we work like slaves & make the house really uncomfortable for us. They will stay in their corner accessing & gossiping about everyone & everything. I have not gone with them in the last 3 years because I usual come back home angry & emotionally drained. Last xmas none of the wives went, it was as if we all planned it. I always encourage my husband to go though because they are his family & wouldn't want to come between them. My family treat my husband like gold, my siblings will travel and buy stuffs for my husband and sometimes wouldn't get anything for me..... my hand is paining me already!
ReplyDeleteYou did well to yourself and your sanity by not going.
DeleteDon't go again, you have your parents and other relatives you can spend good time with.
And I believe your sister in-laws are married women or young women in a relationship..
Oh so sad. Holidays with family are supposed to leave a lasting memory.
DeleteGood thing you don't go anymore for your sanity sake.
I don't have parent in laws so I don't even know how the inlaw thing is done.
Before he married you, you will wake up in his mom's house by 4am, fetch water in the stream, cook and serve everybody,
ReplyDeletesweep and scrub even the streets and compounds.
The mother tells him that this lady is a well trained girl, he marries you. Viola, you expect the same MIL to enter the kitchen
cook and serve you and your kids? Are you serious? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
😂😂😂😂😂😂Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
DeleteAint nobody got time for this kind of dirty work oh. Even in the abroad, people who can afford it get someone to clean their homes once, 2 or 3 times a month, life is not hard.
DeleteLet alone in Naija where labour is cheap. You expect me to work Monday to Friday, then spend my whole weekend cooking and cleaning. And even if I don't work Mondays to Fridays, I don't have to kill myself in the kitchen.
Even my parents, we got someone to do all that work.
I cook, I clean but I do it at my own pace, no pressure, not out to please anyone or make any one like me. You don't have to like me, let us just respect and be civil to each other.
The last time I woke up at 4am must have been when I was in school, ooops also when I was nursing. Me wake up at 4am?? Lmao.
Abeg there is no reward or award for who work pass.
If there is a gathering and we are all there, we will all work.If I fix breakfast, you fix lunch, let someone else do dinner.
DeleteDon't fold your because wifey is around. We will do division of labour, except for my mil, and If we can pay someone to do the job, better. I am not a slave and cannot kill myself.
I spent Christmas with my in law, there were times I was working my butts off in the kitchen, other times I didn't lift a finger.
Lmfao do people really do this? I thank God for my life.
DeleteSweep and scrub the compound got me🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
DeleteI don't have such problem with my in-laws, I do what I can do just as in my parents house I even send my hubby's siblings on errand as hubby is the first Son and child.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your first line. But most don'want to do anything in their in laws house at all.
DeleteI can do with my mil but sis in law and bro in law, I can't. I don't expect you to do anything in my house so don't expect me to do in your house
DeleteNo doubts I know most in-laws are very callous towards their daughter's in-law, and these is so bad. I & my husband visit his parents every now & then, and I can boldly say am blessed with very wonderful in-laws. I personally feel it's a two way thing, if your treated with love and respect please accord the same treatment to them. Most ladies go into marriage with very bad mindsets, expecting to be treated wrongly,& if they get an opposite reaction, they tend to believe it's all fake and go ahead to be hostile to their in-laws.
ReplyDeleteI agree it's a two way thing, but a lot of times, the man's family are unappreciated, feel entitled, and take advantage of the good wife. If and when she reacts, there will be trouble..
Delete*Nigerian mother’s-in-law left the group chat*
ReplyDeleteI don't know what this guy is talking about...my mum doesn't even allow my wife to do any chores whenever we visit her....after the birth of our son, she stayed with my mum for 3 weeks, the only thing she did was breastfeed her baby..i even had to tell my mum to let her bath her baby so she could learn how to handle the baby when she's back at our home...this guy's theory no work in my own case o
ReplyDeleteYou have a good mum... Not all mum and sister in-laws or brother in-laws are bad.
DeleteMy mil told me to start kneeling on my two knees to greet her after I had my first baby. This is me that has never knelt to greet my own father, it was like a set up. The next morning she entered my room to get something, I was on the bed breastfeeding and greeted her, she didn't answer. After 3 days of attitude, I packed my things and went back to my house. Nothing like peace of mind
DeleteIf I tell you what I have seen in the hands of these people it's a story of another day.Just married for 2 years just a little misunderstanding with husband they ganged up against me because it was festive period,even their eldest sister said that where i come from my people are always acting smart that i came to do the same to them,this is a woman every year she spends Christmas and new year in her father's house with her grown up childern.There is nothing to enjoy there only people looking for you to make mistake so that will gossip about you. Thank you am very far away from them ,when am ready I travel home and stay in the city
ReplyDeleteWe are in the same Whatsaap group
DeleteI can so relate with this
ReplyDeleteThat's what am going thru right now, am in my inlaw house, I just put to bed, I practically do everything in the house,even wen my baby is crying,my mum inlaw will tell me to back her and make food the whole family will eat,she will say I pamper my baby too much dat is y she is crying. They are yorubas, I can't wait to leave here,ground no just level
ReplyDeletePele dear, na their way. Continue to endure till you get out of there.
DeleteOh dear! Please try and go back to your house ASAP.
DeleteIt is common with local yoruba families. Pls try and get out of there as soon as possible. I am guessing you must be low on funds for you to be tolerating such. This is the time you need rest. Where is your husband?
DeleteI am what you will call ajebo "unfortunately" married to a local yoruba family. My husband was the only one that went to school amongst his siblings. We met when he did his MBA.
His background moulded him to be this disciplined hardworking hustler. Which made him rich unfortunately same can't be said for his family, they are all leeches.
Initially, I tried to be nice. Always smiling. He had this sister that expected me to cook and bring to her Pako shop everyday. I did it once in a while and she always complained about my food to hubby. Hubby always shut her up but never tells me. I overheard one day.
When I was a new bride, any event his sisters invite me to, I go. There is this particular one who calls the others and gossips about me, saying I am spoilt, that money is all I have bla bla bla.
I have changed it for them. I am no longer the naive bride and I ignore them. When they come to beg my hubby for money, I always encourage him to give them more. He has given them money to set up businesses but they have decided to be useless.
If only they know what they would have benefited from me had they been humane towards me.
Pele o, I have nice yoruba in laws. They are rich so they don't stress. They sometime tell their maid to come to my place to clean up so I can rest
Deleteits not a tribal issue na the humans wey you dey deal with
DeleteMadam where is your husband. You better take care of yourself don't let them turn you to door mat
DeleteWow! Reading comments and I can boldly say "women are their own worst enemy "
ReplyDeleteMy brothers wives are being treated like Queen's that they are,they sometimes goes to my villa on their own with d kids to check on my parents
Up bringing matters a lot,I just pray for a good mother in-law and sisters in-law too
Fear sister in-laws they are the worst when it comes to being wicked and I have them aplenty😱😱they so much live eye service whenever hubby is around swarming around me like mother hen because of what they can get,I stopped visiting them a long time ago to regain my sanity because once you are with them you do practically everything for them which doesn't stop them talking behind your back.Thank God I hardly visits them nor call sef,if you call I return but visiting is out of the question now and when they come visiting they want to eat the house down but now if they like let them bang my gate morning till night I won't open if I am not in the mood,if woman tay for house,she go turn witch😂😂.My brother wife always comes with her househelp because she knows I won't allow her to enter my kitchen so she brings the househelp to pack and wash plates for her when she finish eating while I cook and take care of my niece😘she sleeps all day,watch tv and we gist till she goes back to her house,I hardly ever visit them and the others too as I maintain my lane to avoid being disrespected
ReplyDeleteSisters in laws are the worst. My own all claim to be spirit filled tongue talking prophetesses, yet the gossip more than anything
DeleteThis is true. I dont like spending time with my in laws because we stay in the family house that is not comfortable. Kitchen is outside, fetching water from gallons to cook, more than 10children around so everywhere is always untidy etc. Its uncomfortable for me because I did not grow up in such setting. This Christmas, I stayed behind till after new year with my daughter before travelling down to meet my husband in the village. I spent 6days and shared it between my parents house and inlaw place. My mum inlaw is very nice though, she doesn't have any issues it's just the environment that stresses me out.
ReplyDeleteHAHHAAA
DeleteIs this my comment?
My mother in law is an angel
But poverty has given their kids a huge dose of entitlement mentality and boyyyy did you say 10 kids??????
Mine was 19 humans in a 5 bedroom home for christmas ..I kid you not!
This topic! That was how my husband had d audacity to tell me to go clean her sister's room. I have an infant I'm struggling with and all the stress.
ReplyDeleteThe kind of eyeing I gave him Dat day, he will never forget it.
That's not work for me compared to what I do daily. But for ur sis to sit down. And gist all day doing nothing? U are mad! I think d devil used his brain to drink palmwine Dat day.
Upon her arrival, I made sure d room and toilet was clean and I even changed d sheets. So I should continue cleaning after her everyday because u want them to see me as a good wife... Ikwkwakwkwa. He actually ran out of d house day day because he knew that for me not to say anything, it's more disastrous.
No body can turn me to a slave bkos I got married oo. That why u see most married women lookin so stressed out bkos of house chores and inlaws stress.
On a normal day I can joyfully clean her room, but not u telling me like I'm ur house help. And to think I've washed clothes cooked and cleaned other parts of d house Dat same day all by my self? I was livid!
Anyways na how person put imm self dem dey use am. If u put ur sef down na u go drag goat go church for village Thanksgiving... Shior
you all took the first and middle sentence from Martins forgetting the last sentence where he wrote: Wisdom however is knowing What to do and when to do it without being reminded.....Martins thank you so much for this statement. if they are in the kitchen join them, if they are cleaning take your own part and clean.Are you not going to eat the same food or sleep in the house with them? imagine..... some women saying trash here and you want your sister in law to come back with brother and whereas you can't go with your own hubby to visit his family all in the name of not wanting to do the cooking and the rest.. what is there to cook or do just for a two week or one week holiday? Visit them and still go and visit your own family. lazy youths..
ReplyDeleteShut up joor...
DeleteWhat is there not to do? Some of these women are already stressed out with their daily life issues, juggling work, motherhood and tending to their husbands.
I don't see anyone here saying they don't want to lift a finger. The complaint is being made to do all the chores and cooking.
Why can't it be a short holiday for the wives to rest and be pampered? Is that a taboo?
Biko, enter house go sleep madam wisdom.
So if she is stressed out,the people you are expecting to do the chores aren't ba? Let's respect ourselves. Contribute the quota can and leave the rest. Everybody suddenly turning to posh wife. I just tire
DeleteI can relate. Anytime I visit my inlaw, I overwork myself. As early as 5a.m MIL is waking me up to do chores. They wanted me to stay an extra week when hubby was going back to base, but I lied I had an urgent meeting and can't stay. I ran.
ReplyDeleteWow 5am to do chores,
DeleteYou had to lie?
It is well
Tenth I had to lie o. FIL was like I should stay longer so that I can be cooking delicious meal for them. Visitors will come, FIL will say I should leave all what I'm doing and prepare food for the 'community'
DeleteStory long o. Now I just do me. They hate me because I'm not a push over. I act frail but very strong. They don tire for my matter.
My in laws have inferiority complex. I have learnt to ignore them and my husband doesn’t give them the chance to get at me. They are the type that wan to come to ur house and eat and play from morning till night without doing anything to help. I had to stop it. Igbo people enh Kai.
ReplyDeleteIt's not about tribe.
DeleteIt is the family.
If I start to talk,hmmmmmm!
ReplyDeleteMy husband's senior brothers wife (co wife) fought me last December after using me like a maid because her daughter,my husband's niece dey do introduction,I worked like a maid! We travelled down to their place for the party,I have not even rested,no what are u going to eat,no water. I worked and worked even to the extent of picking bottles,nylon of pure water,leaves of pounded yam on the floor. The stupid iyale (co wife) even had the audacity to tell me to give her neighbours left over stick of vegetables oooo when she has her own small children she can send. After all said and done,the following day,we were to go back,she started shouting that I can't cook for her family! She has two young daughters and two young sons that are useless and can't do house chores but wait i g for me to cook after the stress I passed through that day for her entitled daughters introduction. She said I shld never step into their house again,on too I didn't ask her what I will cook. Sincerely,we don't do this in our own family,so I am experiencing this first hand. She sha later apologized because I never said a word all through her accusations. I have decided to go to her daughter's wedding coming up this year but will never sleep over,I will go that day and come back that day, some in-laws are from pit of hell
I have done that oversabi maid thing for occasion,my dear never again
DeleteYes go that day and don't sleep over since they don't value you.
DeleteWhat annoyed me is you said your husband's elder brother's wife??? sending you errands how? Even if she is older than you, you don't owe her shit. Both of you are co-wives.
DeleteNever ever subject yourself to such ridicule. Do the bit you can and leave the rest.
No dey put face down like that next time, does she not have younger sisters or cousins? Hian.
Poverty is a disease. Look at the financial situation of the future husband's family before you enter. I can't imagine the rich doing all this to their daughter in laws
ReplyDeleteI tell you,poverty na bastard
DeleteWalahi marrying down as a lady is the worst thing you can do to yourself
DeleteSo true,na poor family that has never stepped out of their comfort zone dey do so. Poor people have inferiority complex and a sense of entitlement. Since they can't make it and are getting old and see the young couple living fine,they become jealous just like my poor,self entitled and low self esteem co wife.
DeleteVery true
DeleteYou're wrong, I wonder why people assume the rich are perfect, mund you the very rich ones would likely have helpers at home but that doesnt mean they are not observing your weaknesses and strength.
DeleteMy Husband would not even allow me even if i want to try it. I am a guest and should be treated as one. I don't do eye service. I do what i can especially during parties. My in-laws are Yoruba. My mother in-law is very nice, she doesn't allow me to work, my sister in-law even washes plates and sweep when she visits me with her children, though her children are a handful. They Mess up everywhere. It's my husband's step mum and her children that are entitled lots. I have put them in their place sincE.
ReplyDeleteI pray your hubby doesnt take another wife. Pls put it in prayer because my spirit ministered to me about you.
Delete