STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
LOCKDOWN BABY
Good day Stella.Kindly keep me anonymous.
I came on holidays with our 2 kids to the US in February, but because of the coronavirus pandemic,we haven't been able to go back, the borders are closed.
My husband has been here 5 months before I came.Now, I just discovered I'm pregnant and our 2 kids are under three.
A friend of mine here in the U.S advised me to have the baby here, but I'm extremely worried about the hospital bill.we are running out of cash, we are staying with my cousin and I know soon she will be tired of us.
She is acting up already.
Someone advised we go to Georgia and rent a basement to start with since life is easier there.We are currently in Maryland.
I am very confused and sad Stella, bv's living in America kindly advise me on what to do.how much is it going to cost me if I have my baby here without insurance.
Should I go back home and have my baby if the borders are opened?
My husband is about to get his green card,will my giving birth here affect his status? I'm only on visitor's visa. .Is it easy getting a job etc ? How is life like generally in America with kids? Kindly advise me ,thank you!
*American people over to una!!!
Americans in the house come and give advice... Your opinions are highly needed.
ReplyDeleteI don't want to ever imagine living in the us illegally. Overstaying of visa is the reason Nigerians have been blacklisted in western countries.
I believe the us will be considerate in this case. They closed their border, didn't they?
DeleteYes Anonymous 15:22, but, Nigeria government made an announcement that they will be repatriating Nigerians in the US, especially those that have overstayed their visa.
DeleteAmerican government put all these things into account.
Please be honest, is your husband presently married to a US citizen hence his Green card is pending?
DeleteIf your pregnancy is stressful, this can be taken into consideration but you'll need paperwork from your Doctor stating so
I personally would advise you to return to Nigeria as soon as the borders are back open!
Dear poster i dont know about returning o, but dont commit abortion in a state that is illegal o, before it enters another case
DeletePlease I will tell you to remain in Maryland,is much easier cos of transportation,in Georgia most places don't have public transportation and train,for the weather yes Georgia is cool . writing from Atlanta.
DeleteLife in America without husband's physical support or money/job of your own plus three kids will be very very very difficult and stressful, to say the least. My advise is go back to naija, have the baby and continue your life peacefully there. Your hubby is about to have his green card you say, he will file for all his three kids na, abi? Why the rush? Suffer dey Yankee without money or man o. Na draw I draw your ear!!!
DeleteMay God lead you to make the best decision
ReplyDeleteNo idea. Na naija I dey stay
DeleteAmerican people over to una "in stella's voice "
ReplyDeleteHaven't been to America,so no advice from me to you 🙂
People living in obodo oyinbo over to you ooo
ReplyDeleteYou didn't tell us how your husband is getting a green card after just five months in the usa?
ReplyDeleteThat has a lot to do with your situation considering the present US government policies.
Also you did not tell us when your visit visa is supposed to expire.
Hubby did marriage of convenience when he got here ,so we divorced
Delete@15:44
DeleteThat is the problem. You are asking us to support you to come to equity with soiled hands, really?
Because of the quest to go abroad, you divorced your husband?
And which woman will he "marry for convenience" just to get papers and not for life?
That is probably why your host is "acting weird," she doesn't want to be roped into your quagmire.
Once you folks are busted, she will be investigated and probably prosecuted as an accomplice.
I don't understand why Nigerians love to cut corners and be illegitimate in everything and you do
it for convenience.
To think that I was almost deliberating help till delivery.
I wash my hands off. Safe delivery.
It shouldn't affect your hubby. Especially as he would have had his green card before the baby is born. I would advise you to stay there and have your baby. But your hubby should be ready to foot all bills by hustling twice as hard. Moreso it may be difficult for you to get back to US once you leave. But this kinda matter should not be discussed on social media na. Na Wetin dey give us bad names be this, other countries do it but won't discuss it on such platforms. In summary stay with your hubby wherever he is.
DeleteBetter make your way back to naija. You knew the situation of things yet you didn't use protection and got pregnant again.
DeleteIt is well. I hope he re-marries you. I know of a guy whose wife divorced him and sent him to the US for green card, as i speak to you, he is not going back to her. He has divorced fianlly and the wife does not know.
DeleteExactly @ Anony 16:36, very careless of her to have gotten pregnant. Her issue does not disturb the man, she came as a visitor and shud leave as a visitor.
Delete**** see as you reply. Even me wey dey Nigeria dey get BP as you dey type. All you could have said is since you are like this I won't be able give you any good advice. You just asked her that information for amebo purposes and not to help.
DeletePoster, biko you and your husband should look for a church with Nigeians, the pastor will be able to advice you. Also, I think you should start looking at going to school since you are there take up a course. Your husband should also move out, Since you people are divorced .
Deceitful lot!
DeleteMama Vee
DeleteWho is deceitful here?
Liar liar, deliberating help till delivery indeed. You just sniffed for more info to use against her.
DeleteDeceitful lots I concur
DeleteDon't mind d lieing smelling thing.trying to fool herself.u were trying to help her indeed.people always blabbing trash
DeleteI feel for you poster. I heard our people there do not like accommodating anyone that overstays.
ReplyDeleteIts not easy accommodating anyone talkless of one who is on the wrong side of the law.
DeleteMy cousin in the US accommodated her brother's friend, this friend was using her landline to make direct call to Nigeria for two weeks, he even used her card to buy things. She didn't know until the modafucka left.
If you accommodate someone that overstayed their visas, the law might work against you and see you as an accomplice.
Ure not serious, you think it's easy to accommodate someone abroad with 2 kids for a month let alone 5 months. Don't go there please.
DeleteThis is an unfortunate time that people have lost their jobs and still have to pay mortgage, rents, bills, put food on the table etc. Or you think the lady accommodating them won't pay for electricity or water? She has to put TV on all day for those children, buy a lot of food because anyone with young children know how they eat.
Let's be careful with the way we talk.
5 months, she should be thanking and praying for her host in this hard period.
After the experience I had I don't accommodate guests from Nigeria anymore asides my parents, my husband parents and my younger sister and her family, if ure coming on holiday to the UK then book a hotel. You can come to mine to spend the day, that's it shikena.
Save yourself of unnecessary wahala, because na your name dem go go call for Nigeria.
Anon 16:00 how are you sure they don't give the cousins money. You sound like they may be free loaders. They may be buying groceries for the house and the rest. The cousin may be acting up because she simply just needs her space and that is natural. But you make it look like people who come from Nigeria and stay over cause problems. My sister in-law stayed with her cousin for almost 3months when she went to give birth and they understood each other. Except your family behave funny. If not things like this should not work u up like this.
DeleteTo the poster, since your hubby has divorced you then you can move to Georgia and start life as a single woman since you are technically single. Abi I no understand. Also if there is an American Lawyer In house please advice her on what to do.
She is single,and if shenbirths the baby, she cannot put the husband name as father as that would cause trouble for him cause he is committing immigration fraud. Hope your husband paid for his marriage of convenience and not deceiving anyone oh.
DeleteInfidelity is not grounds for losing the green card though.
DeleteDear poster kindly take things easy cos of the baby, praying God come through for you guys soon🙏🙏 to make the best decision
ReplyDeleteCome back home to peace of mind, America is not heaven.
ReplyDeleteNigeria is heaven? Are you not tired of how Nigeria is, suffering and smiling. You will say you have a car, but bad road no dey disturb you. The main problems black face in the US is racism but it is far better than the atrocities committed in Nigeria. Nigeria is a zoo. Nobody is free, nobody is anything here. you that always comment you are at the risk of one check point and SARS will just waste you.
DeleteDon't ever feel happy you are living in Nigeria.
Nigerians you better wake up from this Una slumber una dey so.
Anon 17:38 you dey Mind Don. Someone that sleeps and wakes up on blogs day and night to take his mind off how miserable his life is. Nigerians won't hear. A lot of them wanna stay in naija because they hope to go into politics and chop from the national cake. To most of them that will just be an unreachable fantasy. Others know that their wuru wuru ways can only go undetected in naija. In America, you life has to be straightforward else you will get caught up. Most naija people can't survive in such an environment where an honest living is the only way
DeleteNigeria is no heaven, BUT is it a reason to enter another country illegally and fraudulently? If Trump throw una out na, una say he is racist...why cant Nigerians do the right thing for once?? Marry for papers, overtstay visas, then go to church to shout loudest than others!!
DeleteThey didnt enter illegally, things are messed up for her because of the closure of borders
DeleteNobody is going to say he is racist @anon19:57. If you immigrated legally kudos to you. I am sure if Nigeria was spectacular nothing would really make one migrate to another country but you were fortunate to get yours legally. The only people that I condemn are those who participate in marriage fraud by decieving a citizen that they love them only to obtain papers.other than that, these people are trying to make the life of their kids and family better. Don't judge any1 who migrates out of Nigeria because they are being as self centered as our own politicians who don't care about their citizens.
DeletePoster pls get in here and tell me how you processed your visitor's visa,am interested
ReplyDeleteYou need to have a lot of travel experience to Europe, u.k .that way they believe u will come back and good money in your bank account
DeleteMake friends within Nigeria community. Interact with people over there and ask questions. Information is key.
ReplyDelete@ Anonymous, if they falls into the wrong hands, they'll snitch on her?, Nigerians overseas are EVIL!
DeleteThey are EVILLLLLL OOOOOO... do not confide in anymoe. Not even anyone that looks or smellS like your best friend. They will snitch on you at their first opportunity. It could be something as small as you didn’t greet them right. Or you are looking very happy and they are struggling. Don’t even try it.. I don’t support you and your husband divorcing for papers but true deed is already done. Move to Atlanta with your husband and start a quiet illegal life until your husband can marry you back and give you papers.
DeleteAnd by the way, The rule of thumb is if he got his papers through spousal immigration process he was to wait for about 5 yrs after that period before he can file for another wife.. a lot of people try to file for their wives right away after they got their green cards from another woman and they most likely get denied. Plan your life well, hustle, start a new life in a cheaper place and pray your husband comes back to you!
Why didn't you guys come bk when people were coming back
ReplyDeleteHmmmm you guys actually believe FG brings them back for free. No! You will have to pay for your return and it’s above $1,000 per passenger. My cousins paid N1.7m from Delhi to Lagos on Air peace. Some people who don’t have that spare cash are going a-borrowing or better still, waiting it out while managing the little they have on them. It’s not easy.
DeleteNo country has repatriated its citizens free of charge, considering that they know each citizen went out on their own volition.
DeleteNigeria's own is very cheap sef, $1,700 when Americans paid $3,300 and Canadians were charged $5,000.
By the way, the money they are gonna spend feeding and renting basement apartment in US and for trying to "run things", would have been enough to get her a seat on the repatriation flight.
Is it suppose to be free? Even American and European countries also paid...haaba
DeleteThe borders are closed so you can stay till then. I think this might be a blessing in disguise. Sorry poster, but how to you comfortably have sex in your cousin's house with 2 little children. I'm sure you were given one room. You for tell oga to withdraw
ReplyDelete😂😂😂😂😛😂😂
DeleteIt honestly depends on when you are due. If the borders are open before your due date and you can fly, PLEASE GO BACK. Your husband's green card would apply to you and your kids eventually so I don't think it is a do or die issue. Please do the right thing and do not put yourself and children at risk. Peace of mind is important. If they do not open the borders by your due date, then you have no choice. Nigerians please stop overstaying visas, PLEASE. My aunt and sister have both decided to overstay their visas and it frustrates me! It doesn't affect the overstays, it affects EVERY other person that tries to go through proper channels. The U.S has so MANY visa classes that you could get in legally even as a Refugee if you want it that bad. Stop breaking the laws of other countries. It is not fair to other Nigerians.
ReplyDeleteThis is the best advice thus far. Return to Nigeria when the borders open. If you still have a valid visa and really wish to birth your baby there (which is now illegal), you can fly back to the US alone atleast 8 weeks before your due date (because of the new policy of staying at least 6weeks before baby arrives to qualify for birthright citizenship). Best to save yourself all these headache as peace of mind is golden. Also know that having to pay your bills by cash is no small quest and you may not easily save up before baby arrives. It's just unnecessary strain on your family finances and you won't recover in a hurry. Don't listen to that your friends advice, she doesn't mean you bad but she's talking from the point of ignorance. It's one thing to illegally immigrate alone, it's another thing to do this with kids. You can read up Nairaland thread on giving birth in USA. it will help you locate a hospital and doctor. Hope this helps.
DeleteIf they won't open borders before your due date, then get prepared to birth your baby their but if the border opens soon just return and have your baby in your country, remember all you have is a visiting visa and if border closure is the reason you are still in Maryland it simply means your visa has expired.
ReplyDeletePoster you can call me 🤙
Your two kids are under 3,the more reason you should have taken caution.
ReplyDeleteWhy not come back home,at least family will be there to assist.
Comeback home,when its time to deliver you go back unless the lock down with continue
ReplyDeleteDo not have your baby in the US. Thhe bill will be 100,000 dollars plus at a minimum. If you dont make the payment you will be banned from the US and your child will not get citizenship. Nigeria government is current scheduling a return flight from Washington to Nigeria. I suggest you get on that flight and return home. Trumps US is not supportive to immigrants. Please return. US is expensive
ReplyDeleteTrump's US is not supportive to illegal immigrants.
DeleteI know people that have legally migrated to US in the last two to three years.
Trump doesn't have any problem with legal immigrants!
I don't live in America but abeg please take it easy 100,000 dollars. AHH Han. You can advice that for the sake of future purposes she should go back since her hubby is already married but this one that delivery is 100k isnt true. AHH hannnnnnnn
Delete100k ke? Fear God pls. Poster pls return to Nigeria. Unless this was a planned pregnancy, common sense should have prevailed and you should have used protection. The Days of anchor babies are fast coming to an end
DeleteThat's not correct! I had my 2 kids in the US (Prince George's County) Maryland. One in 2013 abd tge other in 2015. The first one,the total hospital bill was about $12,100, excluding gynae/obs fees which is $2,850 for cs delivery. I came to hospital on Friday and left on Sunday. The 2nd baby, the hosp bill was about a total of $10,100 (excluding the gynaecologist fees which was still $2,850). This time, I came to the hosp on Friday and left on sat. The bills comes on bits abd pieces. They will charge fir nursery services, midwife, drugs, anaesthetics, pediatrician, main hosp stay etc. But the total bill came to that amount. They also allow you to enter into a payment plan and pay a certain amount every month until you finish paying. It can be between $300 - $500 a month.
DeleteThe govt also offer sone services to offset dome bills if you gave birth without insurance (deco onsurance). They wrote to me severally abd actually cane visiting when I didn't respond but I didn't take it because I was on visiting visa abd I didn't want trouble with renewing my visa but if you decide to stay on, you can take it (if they still offer it). It doesn't matter if you don't have your papers.
The doctors clinic I used was owned by an Indian man and a nig so they understand tge pain of converting money to pay bills. In both cases, they signed for me to be discharged against medical advice (AME Form). Infact they were tge ones that told me to go,that the more I stay, the more my bills.
I dont think the billing would have risen outrageously like that. More importantly, you can always take a payment plan.
Another important point, (your dr should tell you anyway), when you want to deliver, go to the hosp and tell them you have an emergency and give them tge name of your dr. They will call him to come. They will attend to you and afterwards send tge bills. If you go just like that to deliver, the hosp will insist on a deposit.
All in all, if you don't have any complications, you wills should be below $20,000.
All the best.
The bill is $10k on average not $100k,check with some Catholic charities in the area to see if they can help with the cost of the delivery,there are many in the DC area. I say Catholic charities specifically because they help folks a lot and they have free legal advisory services (...is that what they are called?) so they can tell you if there are legal implications of having my a baby for your husband while he's married to someone else to get a green card,God's blessings to you during this journey. Get legal advise,I think that's the main thing.
DeleteStella Korks, well done,please release my comment. Poster, also, can't you get a basement in the DC area, or can't you pay your cousin more to stay with her? It may be cheaper to get a basement in Georgia, but they don't have a good metro system to get around and stuff.
Delete@Everly these people are squatting and are reluctant to even rent their own apartment long term, how will they pay almost 15k on childbirth only?
DeleteThe figures you guys Are quoting are for if she has a smooth child birth that we pray for. Any minor complication and that amount will shoot through the roof
DeleteIn 2012 it cost me approximately $20k to have my baby. In 2015, it cost me approximately $60k. So $100k is not far fetched. Both were Scheduled CS due to my complications.
DeleteYes, it is possible to have a $100k medical bill without insurance unless she has vaginal delivery without complications. If she has her baby preterm via cs and that baby has to spend weeks or two months in the NICU, God forbid o, she'll have close to 100k in medical Bills. The American medical system is freaking expensive and you cannot compare it to those who come to birth their baby here from Nigeria. If you live here and you have to do prenatal visits and all the radarada tests they like to do and the silly gestational diabetes scare. You can be looking towards paying a lot of $$.
DeletePoster, I hope you get your husband back. I am not wishing you evil o but I have heard stories like yours, woman divorces husband or vice versa and they never return to their original spouse. I don't know why people cannot get papers through the legal means, there are several opportunities to do so but we decide to continue tarnishing Nigeria's image by engaging in illegalities. This is so wrong, but if you call it out they'll say you're sanctimonious. This is why I never accommodate people who I know are willing to overstay their visa or divorce their spouse to get papers.
Poster, the only advise I have for you is this, return to Nigeria. You are going to get into issues with USCIS if you have that baby in the US. Your husband does not even have that Green card yet, what if he gets denied? Did you not say he is about to get his Green Card? Does that translate to him having it already? This is a big risk you are taking and I am genuinely scared for you because do not let anyone deceive you, life as an illegal immigrant is not peaceful. You cannot experience a traffic stop in peace, you cannot see cops pass by in peace. You'll be living in constant fear of deportation. Please madam think well o!
May God see you through.
ReplyDeleteDon’t worry about overstay for now, you have a valid reason. MD has more job opportunities than atl so I’d advise you stay in MD. Besides, you are close to NY where there’re lots of opportunities too. Google the nearest community health centre or family planning clinic near you. Go there, talk to anyone about prenatal clinic, explain your situation to them and find out programs you can take advantage of. You will be taken care of and delivered of your baby. My friend ONLY paid(less than $200)for circumcision becos she had a male child. Everything from antenatal to delivery was taken care of. Even after delivery, post natal, feeding and all was paid for. These programs are supported my NGOs who caters and targets immigrants and low income pregnant women. You will be well supported. Don’t loose hope, Goodluck.
ReplyDeleteI just asked her the name of the hospital. Its called bellevue hospital in NY, tell them you’re legal but explain your situation as an immigrant and they will take care of you. For convenience find a DHS hospital in MD near you(there’s always one in each state)too cos going to NY back and forth from MD will be so stressful. Now the cons, you shouldn’t leave the states till you and your husband is sorted, you wont be granted a visa or re-entry!
DeleteGod will bless you this anon. God will bless you, even if it doesn't work, she will be linked to some1 who will give her good and sound advice on whether to return or to continue this journey. You see most Nigerians when they travel there, if you ask them for way na so dem go dey dribble person. See that one that said delivery is 100k to scare her. How many of you are there that got there through legal means. Yes Trump has made things alot more difficult, but it isn't impossible.
DeleteSome of you will travel and start saying they should close the border after you have passed. This Una character na why Naija never change. Mainly self centered individuals who only think about what will favour them alone.
Anon thank you for your reliable info.
Awwww16:07, aren't you a darling.
DeleteGod bless you richly.
I'm not in tune with the workings of American system.
Poster I sincerely hope that this helps.
Wait there if your Visa has not expire by the time you gave birth but if your visitor Visa will expire before you give birth,they may consider your case as overstaying which may be very bad for you to join your husband later because they may blacklist your passport,but all depends on whether the airports are open and also here you know nobody knows when air travel will be restored,sorry ma it is not so pleasant but I hope your husband is also supportive because if he is blaming you for unplanned pregnancy it may be so though for you,more importantly pray to God for breakthrough.
ReplyDeletePoster, please remember that the date stamped on your passport to leave is 6 months max for visitor visa. If you aren't sure, apply for an extension before that date comes because if you overstay without an extension, they will likely not give you another visa.
DeleteI honestly can't advise anyone to become illegal.
to
ReplyDeleteOk, this is just my opinion oh, if you have something doing in Nigeria, please go home, let your husband bring you when he is well settled and have his paper.I am in maryland like you. I use unregistered baby sitter and spend $400 for my two kids 3 and 5 years old.It could been more but I pay in full and advance and that got me discount.my baby sitter is like you, no papers.she use to work for assisted living owned by those Indians and Pakistans, they like cheap labour and it was bad, from 6am to 6pm,6 days a week and she get around 6 to 700 in two week just because the employer knows you don't have papers.just imagine that. She had a baby just one, and couldn't handle it cause she has to pay baby sitter now.so she does baby sitting and that my friend is a lot of work.there is no job you can do with 3 kids and no paper cos whatever money you get will go the baby sitters, you might as well stay home and work from home.with your condition now, you can start working from home,Since your hubby is working, let him rent an apartment so you can start working from home cos any outside work you get now will be slave labour. Am sure you were ajibutter in Nigeria and won't be able to survive those slave labour here.Me sef were not buttered in Nigeria and I didn't find it easy in my early days at assisted living and nursing homes, I gave them less than a year and found way to go into more standard health care.stay backing you have the grit and don't have much going for you at home. If not,please come back home
ReplyDeleteBefore I forget, if you decide to stay, a friend once gave me an NGo number md she used for her mom's health services when she didn't have insurance and was visiting.you can try it out and be warned,they used her mom as a research case and she gave her permission.They do that once you can't pay.so if you are open to it, reply and I will drop it with stella.
DeleteGood sensible advice
DeleteHmm Nigerians oo... See advice. For starters I had my 3 babies in the US. I gave birth to my last child in 2015 at Cook County in Chicago. I paid about 3500 USD. That was as at then o. I hear it has increased. What i can advise you to do is to get an extension of Stay. You can look for a Nigerian Doctor to help give you a note that your pregnancy is high risk so you cannot embark on long distance flights. with that USCIS will extend your stay. Please note that you need a lawyer for this. As per your husband getting green card please do not rely on it. Trump banned greencard for Nigerian immigrants since February this year. If he is re-elected i suspect the ban will still be in place because alot of Nigerians have abused their US visas. So its not a surething yet that your husband will get green card anytime soon.
ReplyDeleteFYI i extended my visa when i went to have my second child in 2013 so I am talking from experience.
Please stay back and give your child the opportunity to a better life. Naija is not it o. We pray for better leaders that will make Naija a better place.
All the best.
What about all the Nigerians that have died due to covid 19 where you live...get an extension on what ground...you people should be practical.
DeleteSo you think a Nigerian dr will be ready to jeopardize his license...you better think again...2015 is not 2020
DeletePoster lemme give you a simple solution
ReplyDeleteI live in America, and I am telling you,dont go back to Nigeria. Most Nigerians will tell you America is not heaven because they are pained they were not given visas to come here.listen, go to african stores around you,people always leave notice for "rooms for rent or basement for rent.u can get two rooms for 800 dollars to manage.Georgia is very good,soo many warehouse jobs here.if your husband is hardworking and does a lot of overtime he can make about 800 or 900 dollars a week,,in a week oo,that means after paying rent there is enough cash to take care of u.have your baby in america and use the virus as an excuse. Your husband is doing papers which can cover your kids, he can later divorce that one and file for you too.you will be fine ok, dont listen to anybody telling you to go back.America is a land of opportunity,plenty jobs dey.i have been trying for my sister for 5 years now but they always refuse her
God bless you for dis info
DeleteCONTD...I forgot to mention you Can discuss with hospitals and have payment plans and agree on how you will make the payments. There are cheap hospitals. Google it. You can get hospitals that are less thank 8000 USD and have a plan to pay back over time. Just ensure you make the payments. You will be asked for the receipts.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your self less advice. You have a free mind.
DeleteThe best advice!!! You've a good heart. Most Nigerians are full envy. Because they don't have what you have. Poster don't listen them
DeleteHave your baby in America and enjoy life . Good luck. :)xbox
Poster take this advice, if you come back to Naija you won't be able to go back and your husband will remarry. Since you are there, if the marriage no workout again, you find your own arrange get paper, stay there oh
DeletePoster, please try detroit, Michigan. I have a family friend with two little kids,who went in with visitor's visa. She joined a Nigeria church ,the church was even ready to link her with an arangee man but the husband developed cold feet. The church encouraged her to apply to a school whose registrar is a church memeber ,she applied,was offered an admission and her status was changed to student. At least,for now,she can breath n make future plans,the only hitch is that she can't travel out of the states because the student visa was issued inside and is not stamped. Join a Nigeria community,ask questions and pray for the best. By the way,her children's status were also changed so who knows. Leave your husband out of the plans if you dont want to mess up the bigger picture n make your plans around you and the children while waiting,hopefully, for your husband to become legal. May God see you through.
DeleteDid you just say the Nigerian church was ready to link her with an arrangee man? My goodness! Y'all should be careful what you write online, do you think this blog is only read by Nigerians? You don't know DHS does their research, when they completely ban Nigeria from immigrating here and start cracking down on illegal immigrants from Nigeria, you'll say Trump is mean or America is unfriendly to foreigners.
DeleteBe ready to pay a staggering amount to birth your baby in the US, plus putting that sort of burden on your cousin who accommodated you without contributing a dime is not fair. Living in the US or UK, by overstaying your visa is a no no in these times, and staying with someone while overstaying may just jeopardise the kind person who accommodated you. Do the right thing and go back home when borders open.
ReplyDeletePoster please take the advice of anonymous 16.16. I had my 3 boys there and I used 2 different hospitals.you have 3 different main bills to pay, which is 1, your Dr fee, 2,the hospital bill and 3, the pediatrician bill that will come like 2weeks after you have been discharged, every other bills is just small small amounts. Except you have any emergency or CS delivery.Once you pay for your Dr and hospital bills, every other bills can be paid at your convience or even splited if you choose to.
ReplyDeleteIf you decide to give birth there, check online for Drs in the location where you are that takes less than 3000dollars,once the accept you, they will tell you the hospital where the practice and you go in there to register which can not be morethan 3000 dollars as well.,you can also get discounts if you are paying cash instantlybon registration or on or before they discharge you from the hospital, please try to work things out with your host,they like when their visitors contribute in running the house and also do part of the house chores that way your host won't be too angry or better still you look up for people that put up one room in their apartment for rent.All the best.
Seems complicated...May God help you.
ReplyDeletePoster never ever listen to naysayers. The best thing you should do is to pray to God for divine direction.
ReplyDeleteGeorgia is cheaper to live in but it’s easier to get job in Maryland because a lot of places take tax id.secondly she can use medicAid(the govt pays for the childbirth)to give birth in Maryland but that’s if she wants to remain here or leave the child here if she’s going to naija cos if she leaves she won’t be able to get in anymore.i live in Maryland too so I can give her some tips.
ReplyDelete100k posted please fear God o
ReplyDeleteYou mustn't comment.
See, you need to think ahead at this point. If you plan to come back to Nigeria after having this child, have your baby in the US and make sure you pay your full bill (not medicaid or selfpay discount) or just jejely come back home. Go and ask what was happening last year and early this year when US embassy was calling everybody who had US births for interview and asked to produce receipts. They cancelled and rejected many applications for people who have taken discounts not even insurance! Medicaid is for US citizens only and not for visiting mothers.They even revoked visas that were still valid! Forget all these stories of paying 2/3k bills. When they ask for your receipts anything lower than 10k they will refuse you entry.
ReplyDeleteIf you are planning to stay in the US permanently, have your baby there and make sure your husband marries you and use his insurance.
I never go America before so I can't advice you but I Wish well in whichever you choose
ReplyDeleteMadam, please read this comment carefully. Your decision to stay in the US and have your baby is yours alone but keep in mind that this is going to be a tough road ahead for you. First without you having health insurance, it will cost you thousands to have your baby and that is including your prenatal appointments. Renting a basement with almost 3 kids is not going to be convenient for you. So is your husband planning to remarry you after she leaves this "marriage of convinience?" The US government is not stupid. Your husband may get in trouble if he tries to remarry the wife he already had 2 children with and had another one while married to a US citizen to acquire papers. Think about that. You getting pregnant was a very wrong move. He may not ever have issues with immigration if he doesnt try to marry you but how would you also get papers or do you also plan on entering into a marriage of convenience with 3 kids? Your situation is messed up. What you should be worried about right now is if you will even get your husband back. Whether you decide to stay here or go back once again is your own decision. Think carefully and what makes you think your husband will have his geeencard on a platter of gold since he just got here and conveniently found someone, fell in love and got married within months? He may be on a long road on his quest for a green card. Like I said before, the US government is not stupid.If you decide to stay, I can almost guarantee that you cannot afford the hospital but you won't be the first one. Think outside the box and farther than just whether to have your baby here or not.
ReplyDeleteAnon stop discouraging her, people pay to do the marriage of convenience everytime, u dont have to fall in love with the person, its strictly business.for all you know it's not even in u.s records that poster and husband are legally married, he can always remarry her and she will get her papers
DeleteCome to chicago find one naija church wey go help you,you'll be fine here but you must be very hardworking coz you are technically a single mother with 2 kids and one on the way.You better focus on becoming successful on your own coz there's no guarantee your husband will come back for you in the future.But if you have a very good job in naija don't bother just go back home.
ReplyDeleteHere is what to do
ReplyDelete1. Apply for extension by mail before the expiration of your visa - reason for extension "border lockdown due to COVID-19 pandemic". If you let your visa expires, it will be considered that you overstayed and it will affect you down the road. Very important
2. Do not apply or take any govt assistance. Ask your husband to pay for you to see a doctor for checkup. Use the internet to find Naija doctor who will not charge you much.
3. Do not register at any hospital in preparation for childbirth. Wait till you are in READY labor (here's where your experience with the other two earlier births will help) then call 9-1-1. The hospital cannot refuse to admit you (that's the law). You will be charged but the debt will be forgiven because you will be unable to pay. You got caught up in an unfortunate situation.
4. After your delivery, ask your husband to use condoms or you need to tie your tubes. E don do.
Goodluck
hahahaha naija comedy. If you think that will happen in real life omo you be joker. you funny thou.
DeleteLol @ caught up in an unfortunate situation. Make she try am first, her story go be sorry!!! Poster, better plan your baby's delivery o. He who has ears...
DeleteDearest poster, please if you are sure your husband is going to file for you and your kids, please kindly pack your bags and go home once the lockdown is over. You staying here with EXPIRED VISITORS VISA will jeopardize your coming back here again when it's time to make it permanent. Trump is out for illegal immigrants and believe me, your cousin will get in trouble. A lot of things have changed in the past 2 years. Mind you, if your husband get the basement for you and pay, it will be traced back to him and you need your social security number, prove of income, drivers license and a background check to rent in in California because I don't know about other states. Don't get your cousin and husband in trouble. Go back home and wait please. It might be easy at first because every hospital MUST attend to pregnant women at all times but your name will be like a red flag when you try to do anything else because people who don't have insurance here pay a penalty when it's time to file tax not to talk of birthing without one. Please dear, IF YOU'RE 100% SURE YOUR HUBBY WILL FILE FOR YOU, GO BACK HOME AND WAIT, DON'T RUIN THE FUTURE NOW. Remember, this is an open forum and the Ip address shows that is why I have to pick my words because I'm a military nurse and my address shows too. Whatever you choose to do, I wish you the best but please stay out of trouble.
ReplyDeleteRead through all the comments.
ReplyDeleteFew pointers here:
1. Georgia may be cheaper to live as per housing but the pay is also matched to the cost of living. So technically, it isn't "cheaper" if you are also working there. So if you are not relying on job to pay expenses, meaning you have cash or money coming to you monthly, then go to cheaper states and also states more receptive to help undocumented residents like Alabama, Tennessee, Oregon, Virginia etc. These states are not as saturated with immigrants so getting access to assistance will be easier.
2. Due to the corona issue, immigration should have sent you a notice if your visa was pending expiration for you to send it in for extension. I know this because I had to push my nanny to do hers. Her visa was expiring, prior to corona, she asked for extension, they refused. Lockdown happened prior to her departure date and they contacted her to resubmit for extension. IF your visa will not expire until you deliver, SIT TIGHT AND CROSS LEG.
3. Look for a doctor that deals with cash in hand (usually foreign visitors and Hispanics), register for antenatal as a cash payer. My good friend uses midwives clinics when she comes to delivers naturally. It is usually $3k dollars. It will only be more if they need to send you to the hospital to deliver there or after due to complications with you or baby. When you reach hospital, you can settle the bill as a cash payer. I believe they can discount it up to 90%. It did not affect her visa renewal. Make sure you get a pay in full letter or receipt from the hospital.
4. Find a church around anywhere you go. They will help you.
5. Look inside newspapers for elderly people needing help or craigslist, etc. Work nights if your cousin is home, when the kids are sleeping.
5. America is not naija, ask your cousin how you can be of help. If she is paying rent, pick up 2 utilities and groceries. It is cheaper than renting your own place. Control your children and the noises, take them out often when she is home to tire them. Try to not disrupt her pattern as much as possible.
6. Only a few Nigerians are terrible or will give you away. My family has been here for decades and I have not heard any gists of people snitching on anyone. Join African churches too. They will link you up with under the table jobs. Be friendly and kind to everyone you meet. If asked, say you sent your documents for renewal and waiting for it OR you are stuck here due to the worldwide lockdown.
As for your husband, do not put eye there for now. Think of yourself as a one man team. Any financial support you can get, take it from him.
After you've given birth, move to a different state and go off the radar.
Can't type anymore.
Best of luck.
Hi poster, I’m a US citizen (naija American but born in naija). Please please and please, do not over stay. Get a visa extension ASAP so you can properly plan or get enough money to head back home. You did not plan for this pregnancy or did you? So how are we sure you even have enough money to pay hospital bills. Pregnancy without the support of anyone around, especially if you move to Georgia alone with two kids, you might fall into a deep depression plus dealing with pregnancy hormone. It is not easy at all without a legal document. Heck it’s tough with someone with a legal paper. I work from home with my child, hubs is an essential worker so I know how exhausting it can be, Talkless of two kids and a pregnancy on the way. You need real support system around you. Your cousin is already acting up so what makes you think others will assist. Unless you go to all these churches mentioned in previous comments. Why didn’t you take precautionary measures or take birth control pills to avoid pregnancy for now. You’re really in a tough situation. Birthing your child back home, you’ll have a support system and things are much cheaper compared to the US. Wishing you goodluck though. And by the way, your two kids born in naija might grow up resenting you and their lil sis or bro born in the states. . Make things equal for all your kids please. Go back home.
ReplyDeleteYour last 2 sentences are ridiculous!
DeleteMadam don't destroy your chance of coming to America by staying. If them catch you, you're done for life, and of course they will because the system is changing and nobody will risk anything for you, not even your hubby.Go back home unless you don't want to come back .
ReplyDeleteMadam poster listen to me, do not go back to naija, birth your child here.Your children will have the best life, education is free,kids are fed at school.they'll have free health care except you have a business or job you are going back to. comot eye from your husband for now, let him finish with his process till he's free from the convenient marriage. number 1, it will be very hard and tough for you with 2kids and another on the way,time management is key,even if you get an under the table job,that pays less than minimum wage,how will you manage your work hours and kids school hours? where will you leave your kids to go to work? you will have to pay for baby sitter or nanny,sometimes you'll have to work the weekends. some of these jobs pay $8-$10 hourly wage. You can get basement apartment depending on the state $800-$1000 maximum every month.i am in Boston i dont know the rate for other states. plus i"m assuming your husband would help you financially since you both are in agreement of his pending process. if you decide to stay, like in boston you could get Masshealth the govt will fund part of your hospital bill,though i know nothing about your co-pay.There is always the option of a payment plan, like i said , i'm guessing your supposed husband will help out with bills, i repeat do not go back to naija, give your kids the best life. As for you not having papers, just dey live your life dey go, you cant file tax, work the small job you find take hold body,nobody will come and take you from your house and deport you. I know folks who are undocumented immigrants that overstayed and they living alright with the small job they got.just that if you leave America, you can never return back
ReplyDeleteThis last advice Na Waa! Please don’t listen to the person. Children don’t have free health care in America o!
ReplyDeleteYou have no reason to want to live as undocumented if your husband is about to obtain his green card. Better do things the right way so that you do not destroy your chances of him filing for you in the future.
As for details on where you can give birth at a cheap rate, visit nairaland travel section. There are a lot of thread there. You need to find it and read through.