Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative....

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Thursday, September 17, 2020

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative....

Hmmmmmm...........








STAND ALONE NARRATIVE

UNCERTAIN DECISION....



Hello Stella,


Pls, I need mature and sincere advice.


I have been in a relationship with this Mr for like a year now. He is 5 years my senior and is gainfully employed. I really love him, but I wasn't so careful when I met him, so I didn't put my values and his in check.

I truly love and fear God and have always wanted to end up with a man I will serve God with fervently and enjoy with him, everything I denied myself of in reverence to God.



So, after we got along for some time. I discovered I had said 'yes' to a relationship without spelling out things.

So I decided to call him out and ask him what he wanted, he explained that he wanted to have a fling at first, but now he wants to be with me for the rest of his life.


At this point, I had fallen in love already, though I didn't have s#x with him. So, I told him I will do a no-s#x relationship with him, but if he can't abide by that, we will go our separate ways. He said 'okay'. 


Over time, I discovered he was still seeing his ex and I wanted to break up with him. But, he apologized and told me she was the one bringing herself to him, I know it was a lie bcos I had seen his chats previously and he was even talking about me in a not-so-pleasant way to her. But then, he called her before me to make her talk to me and tell me they're not in a relationship, I didn't listen to her and asked him to end the call.


He later told me she blocked him everywhere blah blah blah...



This Mr is caring, listens to me, shares every little thing he has with me, and shows me off. I don't talk much, so each time he sees me quite, he will come and begin asking what he has done wrong. That I should forgive him if he has done anything wrong, that he loves me and will never hurt me intentionally or make me sad. He has made me know that his life has had more value than it ever did since I came into it, so he isn't ready to lose me. Sometimes I wonder if this is how he will always be. But I am afraid he doesn't fear God, doesn't have known values, and isn't principled.


I told him I need him to have someone he listens to, else I won't go ahead with the relationship for my safety and he approached a decent man in his church and asked him ( the Man)to be his mentor. He has been trying in keeping up the relationship with the man and he shared some things they talked about with me and I was glad.


I don't know if I am overthinking this...but I recently had a dream seeing him cleaning the face of a lady, but when I walked in, he was carefully sited and I could almost swear he never stood up, but I know I saw him mopping her face in that dream. I don't know if he still has side girls because I once had a dream when a lady I know was telling me that she knows a lady this guy I follow is also in a relationship with, but she knows I love him, so she is keeping mute. I never thought twice about it, until I discovered he was seeing his ex. So, I am confused. He is planning on seeing my parents soon but I fear for the future because I know I have an assignment from God and I wouldn't want to be fighting a man instead of having a man working with me to serve God.



Then, there is this other church brother I use to like before now but he never said anything until I got into a relationship. Recently, he called me out and asked me to go pray. It was annoying bcos I expected him to say what he wanted before asking me to go pray about him. Though he truly fears God, he seems to be very rigid. One day, after he called to check on me and asked if I was still praying, I told him 'yes'. 


The next thing he said was "I am not doing you a favor and you're not doing me a favor" I didn't really understand. But it seems, he was trying to say I shouldn't say yes to him out of pity or favor. I don't know where this statement really came from but I found it to be very rude, especially to someone you seem to like. Another time, he told me he was tired after the day's job and I said 'sorry' to him...he said I shouldn't tell him sorry, I immediately told him 'I take back my sorry' then he now said, it's just that he doesn't like being said sorry to. I got weak. He has been inviting me to follow him to one program, I am carefully declining. I want to really know what I am doing. 



I know he fears God, but he doesn't have a stable job and he seems to be a bit difficult. Although I am not close to him I can't say much about him. But I know he is highly principled, loves God but might be very poor in relating to the opposite sex.


People of God, pls advice me!





*This wan na double barrell oh....the one that you think fears God oh and the one that doesn't
,both of the sound like one chance oh....

If i was to advice you on which one of them to decide on,i would say NONE!.......#my2cents

50 comments:

  1. Poster, you haven't found the one for you yet!

    Abort mission with both men!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. As in eh... None of them is the one for you, dear poster. You'll really really know it when the right man comes to you. There is a peace you'll have when you meet him. Stay prayed up!

      Delete
  2. The two suitors here are a no no for me.

    One God has clearly shown you through your dreams that he is painting a picture that is not real for you.

    The other one seems godly but completely unrefined and crude.

    He is the type who may keep shouting submit submit without leading in love.

    My dear na to pray about the two proposals and get clarification from God.

    The first is a no no , and as for the second, if you agree , you still have a lot of work to do to change his orientation.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 🤣 @..."keep shouting submit submit without leading in love." So apt!👌

      Poster you did not specify the principles you expect in a man/person.

      Pray about the first guy but TOTALLY FORGET the second guy. Those type of uptight religious folks are often unexposed, very mean and tend to hide a secret sinful habit LIKE THE PHARISEES❗

      Delete
  3. Poster just continue to watch the first one closely but please don't get pregnant.As for the second one, please run,you will regret him later.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wait for your husband, this 2 are with big comma. Being religious is not rigidity.

      Delete
  4. Mr A is a no no, you snooped and saw chats btw he and his ex, and he said things about you in a "not so pleasant way", (according to you), and you're still there. Ok. Now there's Mr B, a church brother. You know he fears God? HOW??? It's not everyone that goes to Church that has the fear of God in them. Shine your eyes, that's my advise to you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well said Candy. After marriage bro no 2 with is rigidity will now be claiming submission that was not earn, using bible quote to collect your salary, commanding you to buy things in his name. You will not even be able to play with him. Mr no 1 will end up to be Timini Egbuson.

      Delete
    2. Thank you. I hope this Poster opens her eyes to see that these men are not the right ones for her.

      Delete
  5. If I will advise you I will pick the 1st one but is like he is using u as part time to get to his “Ex”

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. @Poster,they are not husband material/s for you. Ignore Mr A sweet talk, and leave Mr B to his rigidity. That Mr B can beat a woman sef... Forget the church thing.

      Leave the two, your "own" husband will come. Dodge the 2 temptations and see God's wonderful work in your life soon.

      Delete
  6. The first man you just described is my husband, he does everything to make me happy, practically everything he owns is in my name and he makes sure I don’t lack anything, he says he’ll never do anything to hurt me intentionally and all he lives for is me and my children, when I complain about certain things he puts effort to stop them and goes the extra mile always for me but he stays in touch with exes, even sends them money, has a number of female friends( some I think he is dating) , this used to get me really mad but I’ve left him to do whatever. It’s not easy being married to him o, he is young and very rich and it comes with its own wahala. Poster please don’t choose any of them, if you must choose, never choose the church brother, it will end in tears

    ReplyDelete
  7. My sister seek the face of God and be patient.Most of this spirikoko brothers hearts are made of rock.better still move on you will be in a better relationship soon

    ReplyDelete
  8. My dear poster keep searching.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Poster my opinion forget that 2nd guy abeg..what is your measurement about fear of God? Fear of God no be for face oh, na by action..Remember even the devil poses as an angel of life..You need to be careful and ask God to give you a discerning spirit that is one gift of the spirit people should yearn for...You tell him to wait first in coming to meet your parents and seek God's face and also tell him to do same..Incase you want to drop them, going forward please put the cart before the house..Don't be afraid to tell a guy what you want, your beliefs and aspirations..Have productive conversation, listen to not just what he says but what he is not saying (Body languages, indepth reading), don't lower your standard for anyone, be yourself..All the best..

    ReplyDelete
  10. None, dear. I understand you may be feeling the pressure to get married both internally and externally. However, it is obvious none of these men meet at least 70% of your critical criteria

    ReplyDelete
  11. May God answer all of your secret prayers concerning martial settlement.

    ReplyDelete
  12. It is well with you dear poster.
    Take everything to God in prayer, He will give you the answer.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I am proponent of the fact that God do speak in dreams. If you have that gift, please don't take it lightly. My dreams has saved me countless times from ravenous dogs of this world. A guy was asking me out then but I saw him appear as a wolf in the dream so I turned him down. Later on a friend told me of how she escaped being raped by the same guy. Another, a church brother asked me out but I saw him in front of the altar with a dark skinned lady, in my dream and the pastor was asking him if he will accept her as his bride and he said yes but the lady said no. Well that was my cue that he was in a relationship with someone. I told him, he laughed it off and said it was my imagination. Sometime later, a lady walked in during service and someone said" look at so and so fiancee". I was shocked she looked exactly like the lady in my dream. It turned out he had already engaged her and they were planning a wedding but church brother wasn't so godly after all just religious and beneath all that razzmatazz was a wolf in sheep's clothing. Well six months later she broke up with him. They never got married. Why am I saying all these? To let you know when you have such a gift, you should never ignore it. The first man is not your man. This is not a case of you taking lumapil like most joke about on here. Dreams are revelations.

    The second guy is not the one either. You don't have peace interacting with him. The man for you, his presence won't threaten your peace. Sometimes God won't waste time in giving us dreams about some while he does for others because he expects us to use discernment. He makes you anxious and trust me you don't want someone like that. Get close to God in prayer and let him direct you to the right one. May we not miss it in marriage. AMEN.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You wrote, "Over time, I discovered he was still seeing his ex and I wanted to break up with him. But, he apologized and told me she was the one bringing herself to him, I know it was a lie bcos I had seen his chats previously and he was even talking about me in a not-so-pleasant way to her".

      You see, not only did God show who he really is in your dream but he went further to give you prove in the physical realm what else do you want, sweets?

      Delete
    2. Sabella, that's very true. My dreams are usually revelations. Very vivid, detailed and comes to pass.

      God can speak to us through dreams.

      Poster, do not ignore your dreams. Pray and ask God to speak to you.

      Delete
    3. I dreamt that my ex fiance was dating some girls with their names giving to me in the dream. I confronted him the next day acting as if i have evidence, when i mentioned all the 4 names he started begging me. One of the girls is someone i even know from his town chai! This yeye people will be speaking language to each other even when am with them but i was blindly in love and i trusted him. I broke up with him even with the love, i cant marry a man i dont trust.

      Delete
    4. Wow, I have the same gift too, one time a guy was asking me out, I accepted and we started dating, one week later, I had the dream, I saw the other lady in my dream, She was wearing a bum short, long painted fixed nails(black color), and a black crop top, she was dark skinned, she was sitting on a chair and was looking at me in a very bad way.
      The next time I saw my bf, I asked him questions about the dark skinned girl, I actually described her, and he denied it and was almost crying in the car, that I was accusing him. Hmmmmm
      Exactly two weeks after I told him about my dream, this lady chatted me on whatsapp, she wore the same clothes I saw in my dreams, on her profile picture, from her wig to her crop top, the nail color, and her bum short, my goodness I was shocked, Even till now, once a guy ask me out, I will see all his history in my dreams, Infact the person would be so surprised, when I start asking questions.
      So poster take your dreams seriously, and pray to God to bring the right man to you, because he will do so.

      Delete
    5. Exactly Sabella. This poster has a spiritual gift plus good intuition but she isn't listening to it due to spiritual immaturity. She hasn't trained her mind to be sensitive to her spirit.

      Poster, your intuition has been guiding you. Please follow it. Forget what these guys are saying and watch their actions. For me, a man who's still talking with his ex is a no-no for me, I don't care what anyone says. He can be friendly with her but not to the extent of gossiping about me with this supposed ex. Please leave that guy with his problems or else na love triangle you go find yourself. You seem like a God fearing young lady who really wants to serve God and that is admirable. What you need now is to deepen your relationship with him and start learning how to hear from him. Don't let desperation for marriage push you out of his will for your life. Leave these two young men for now. They may be good guys but not God's will for you.

      Delete
    6. Poster, you see? From all the lovely comments above that God talks to those he loves and it pays to listen. God sees what you don't see. He knows what happens behind your back and the true intentions of every man. He looks at the heart and he has shown you the heart of the first man. While it is obvious you didn't dream of the second man and you may wonder why. Well, it is because you don't need God to spell it all out for you in black and white any longer. The second guy true self is so evident to you and God already knows you aren't impressed and he trusts you to make the right decision. Likewise myself, I don't dream about every guy I meet I just use discernment most times when God doesn't bother himself to talk about them in my dream because I know at that point, God is thinking "Come on! I gave her, my word, a brain, common sense, and intuition( like bv Dre talked about) and the truth is staring her right in the face so let's see what she got. However, when reality seems so perfect though it is a mirage and all the pointers I stated up there fails you, then God steps in. That is why God revealed the heart of the first guy and not the second because he sees you are getting carried away by his angelic ways, his charade, even though he isn't anywhere close to that. The first man is only doing everything you want just to win you over. Remember..."A man convinced, is a man still of the same opinion" and after marriage he will return to his default setting. A man shouldn't get close to God to snag you rather he should get close to you because of God, because God told him "She is the one". That is not who guy A is naturally and he is just doing all that to entice you. You don't tell a man trying so hard to make you his own, exactly how to get you. You just played right into his hands. Doing so will make him play along just to grab you. You just shot yourself in the foot because you won't get to know the real him. He will put on a show just to impress. Keep in mind, You can't teach an old dog new tricks. Stop playing yourself, sweets.

      You talked about the second guy being God-fearing. The second guy is simply religious. Please try your very best to know the difference. Religious people are fond of carrying the weight of the whole world on their shoulders. Rigidity is one of their defence mechanism. I feel it is their way of masking their fears since they serve God out of fear rather out of undying love bourne out of sheer gratitude they have developed for him. He also seems like someone who is conceited and has underlying anger issues and you may need to walk on tiptoes not to rile him up. I may be wrong but why get put off when someone shows you concern by telling you sorry? That's conceit right there. You don't want to appear vulnerable despite it's human to be vulnerable.
      Anger is witchcraft and God detests a conceited person. So I am here wondering why you still think a man who has those two traits is Godly. He goes to church and he serves God but does he have love, is he humble, patient, kind. Does he exemplify all the fruits of the holy spirit? Yes, We are all works in progress but if he what you say he is then he hasn't mature in Christ and he doesn't strike me like someone who is willing to learn in love. He doesn't seem like a well-grounded person either outside of the church. Maybe socially awkward?Anyways, I pray you to make the right decision and hope you give us a positive response.
      Peace.

      P.s I commented so many times because I would love for you to make the right decisions. I have read stories of both godly men and women who missed it in marriage despite living a holy life now giving others to leverage on the false premise that marrying right is simply " luck" and nothing else. but none would step forward and admit they failed to listen when God cautioned over and over again. He doesn't leave his own.

      Delete
  14. You sound like someone who has a close relationship with the Father. Why don't step back from the two suitors and seek God's face.
    Suspend communication for now. So that you can hear well from God. Emotions doesnt give a happy home.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Please, Christians in the house,
    Is it difficult to hear from Our Lord Jesus;
    John 10:27 My sheep hear my voice and I know them and they follow me...
    How will Jesus be someone's "Lord and Personal Savior"
    and in personal matters like marriage, you ignore him and his opinions
    and say "yes" to a man even before "you know it?"
    😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ANG get off that your high horse of self-righteous and give poster a simple advise❗

      What you display here is not Christianity.

      You really need therapy.

      Delete
    2. Do you ever have an advice or solution to any issue??
      I doubt..
      Your own is to always add to every poster's confusion with your abata yarns.
      Chizzy J

      Delete
    3. @Chizzy
      That's your opinion, and yours alone.
      You are neither the poster's or blog spokeswoman
      I have expressed my opinion, I haven't even seen yours here.
      If a "believer" isn't hearing the "Good Shepherd," then that believer
      needs to evaluate her faith. stay away from iniquity, follow the teachings
      of Christ and you will hear him. Besides, the Lord has already begun to
      speak to this poster to keep her away from evil. Her heart lack of peace about
      the man in question and those dreams.
      😘😘😘😘😘😘

      Delete
  16. This chronicle issa sigh of relief. At least der are ppl seeking God in truth and in spirit not fleshy desires. See d way God is revealing hidden to her anyhow. Poster i am jus excited for u

    ReplyDelete
  17. This is how many have done he’s God fearing and whether frying pan. A man with values has values, he mustn’t be a spirikoko to do so.

    You women that love speaking in tongue brothers are easily deceived because all they have to do is pretend with you.

    None of them is good in my opinion. But you will still do what you want. So...

    ReplyDelete
  18. Dreams are tricky. As you've seen it in your dream also take it to God in prayer.
    What if you're being manipulated in your dream through your own thoughts?
    However, if you have your doubts about this guy please let him know and if it can't be worked out, let him go.
    Your partner should be your confidant. If you can't trust him enough to discuss this with him then you just eject yourself from this relationship.

    ReplyDelete
  19. just avoid the church brother...

    ReplyDelete
  20. Poster you sound nice.
    I’d advice you even see yourself as single.
    The first guy, I know his type. Very indecisive people. It’s a red flag.
    I wish he decide to get closer to God on his own will and you don’t have to point it out to him, cause you see, he may be doing all this getting a mentor and all that just to be in your good book for the main time. Yeah he’s trying to be good, but for how long?
    You are even lucky God speaks to you in dreams before it happens. Mine always happens after I have broken up with said guys. That’s when I see what could have happened in my dreams.
    Look guys that still keep in touch with their exes, it’s not good....To the point of him discussing you with her and even going as far as calling her to prove shit. Nah girl...that’s guilty conscience right there.
    And you see that part where he’s always asking if he’s done something wrong or not when you are quite and asking for forgiveness, babe another sign. I’m saying this cause I have experienced this. Don’t be deceived.
    A man who’s always apologizing for things that he thinks he might have done, is doing something. He’s scared you might have found out about something and aren’t saying anything. He’s low key scared of you cause you don’t talk much, hence you are secretive. I bet he calls you that.
    Don’t climb this mountain babe.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Dear poster,please if you seriously have your doubts concerning the first man please end things with him,then stay away from the other church brother please,Flee from him and keep praying.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Women sha......you are pissed that your 1st boyfriend is in contact with his ex.....but you are also seeing another brother on the side. how are you differnt from 1st boyfriend, you are both seeing other people; someone from his past and someone you just meet......But hey is the bad guy and your are damsel in distress in need of advice

    ReplyDelete
  23. Stella you made laugh o ' this one is double barrel' May God guide the poster correctly.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Dear poster,

    I love that you love God and He loves you too which us why He doesn't want you to make a mistake, hence the dreams.

    Please take those dreams seriously and dump the first guy quickly, and cease all communication with him.

    As for the 2nd one, you have seen his traits and level of exposure, if you can't stand him now, believe me you wouldn't be able to stand him in the future.

    Please take time to pray about it, but detangle yourself from the first guy immediately, such relationships tend to block new and good men from coming spiritually. Talking from experience...

    When I had a dream about someone I was dating for almost 5 years, we had even done introduction, I broke up with him after much tears and prayers, immediately come and see guys lining up to ask my hand... I had to start praying again to be able to choose because it was as if they rang bell that they should all gather..

    So my dear, keep praying and free your mind. GOD LOVES YOU SPECIALLY.

    ReplyDelete
  25. That first guy is fake sis as in big time pretender run away from him NOWWWWWWWWW. Mr church guy issa NO too so continue to wait on God.

    Shalom

    ReplyDelete
  26. The first is not serious and to him, you are forcing him to do things he is not used to. If you love yourself, do not end up with him. The second is a proud being. Flee from such men!

    ReplyDelete
  27. My dear sister poster, your problem is called 'RELIGION'.
    How can you explain the fear of God? Please get the right perception and you'll be able to see and sense things clearly

    ReplyDelete
  28. Please that dream about him mopping a girl's face is God showing u that your guy is cheating on u or will not marry u. Mark my words. Experience is the best teacher

    ReplyDelete
  29. Please dear that first guy is out rightly fake, please run from him, he is pretending to submit just because he wants to win your heart, marriage is forever o, babe think twice. I repeat again guy number 1 is fakeeeeeeeeeee

    ReplyDelete
  30. Poster you are yet to find your better half,if you find him, you will have inner peace.

    ReplyDelete
  31. Double barrel wahala. Do away with both of them and earnestly seek God's face. Your husband is coming but neither Guy A nor guy B is the one.

    ReplyDelete

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