Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative....

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Thursday, October 29, 2020

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative....

Hmmmmm......








STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
UNSUPPORTIVE HUSBAND



My husband has refused to help me. When I was in school, there was an ASUU strike that lasted for 6 months and during that period I told him that I would like to learn tailoring. He asked me to go and make enquiries about how much it will cost.

 I went and the guy gave me a list of things to bring and how much it will cost. I bought the things in the list remaining the money and he just locked up.


After my NYSC in 2018, I registered with my money and learnt for some time before problems came up and I stopped going to the shop (the problem was because he bought an industrial sewing machine for me and my madam became jealous and was always talking bad when I'm not around but my co-apprentice always tells me everything. I didn't want to have issues with her so I stopped going there).


I told him that I would like to go to a finishing school so that I will be able to sew with confidence. He refused and said he would rather give me the money to buy something instead.I've cried and begged but he was adamant that I should do whatever I want.

I then took his phone and transferred the amount to my account. 

My reason for writing now is because my mum said I should transfer his money back but I'm not ready to do that. Am I wrong?.

P.S I didn't delete the debit alert and he knows I transferred money but he hasn't said anything since.




*You want to know if you are wrong?YES YOU ARE!
It is his money and being his wife gives you no right to take it unless he lets you....Return the money and apologise because what you have done is Online fraud oh...lol

Please nobody should come here to feed me blah blah about her being his wife and having a right to his money.....
Nigerian women put their eyes too much on their mens money and hide theirs if they have........I dont have that mentality anymore,EXCUSE ME!

68 comments:

  1. You did wrong by taking the money.
    But looking at it somehow its not so bad because of what you intend to use the money for.
    If you do not want to return the money then I suggest you discuss with your man again, apologise to him for taking the money, plead with him to go ahead to spend the money on fashiom designing finishing school, or still return the money if his response isn't good.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You were wrong to take his money without permission!

      However, don't return it! Go and empower yourself! For the fact you used that money to empower yourself and not buy kuli kuli, it's ok.

      We are in uncertain times now. All hands must be on deck to move the family.

      He maybe one of those men that are a bit insecure with the idea of their wives working. Use wisdom and get him to see reasons with you on why it's necessary.

      All the best

      Delete
    2. Some women are lucky sha, me I don't have right to my husband's phone let alone his bank app. Don't teach that man what he doesn't know, you have no right to take his money without his consent. Just beg him about the money you transferred and let him see reasons for you taking it, if he let go of the money, then fine and good, but if he's still not happy with you, then return his money and apologize

      Delete
    3. nne , you were very wrong to transfer that money to yourself..........please return it, and also note that he may never trust you again with his finances again..make sure you apologise too

      Delete
    4. Its simple now,sebi he will change his password and you'd be happy

      Delete
    5. I'm impressed you have his password. He even bought an industrial sewing machine. He is not a bad person. Maybe you don't look serious about sewing to him

      Delete
    6. All this wahala because you want to learn tailoring. I learnt from a roadside tailor for six months and after I still couldn't make a decent dress for even myself. So many distractions in the shop plus your Oga is probably still learning. My advice is subscribe like 2k monthly data and sit down on YouTube and learn your sewing from the comfort of your home. Start with bilikis signature, her tutorials are easy to understand. Your husband has tried to get you a sewing machine, appreciate him for it. Give him back his money and apologize. There are many ways to kill a bird. Don't start a quarrel in your home over this. The solution is quite simple.

      Delete
  2. Stella don’t worry I Dey ur back. Madam u were wrong. If I were in ur shoes I would at least apologize and promise never to do such again tho as I Dey I no go return the money. But u were wrong madam

    ReplyDelete
  3. Wrong move.

    Send him back his money.

    You went to learn work and started listening to gossip and resigned..

    Your husband did well not to support you again to learn the sewing .

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are one of the most objective commenters on here.
      I wish most Nigerians can treat others the way they treat themselves.
      Instead of minding her business and learning she was busy listening to gossip.
      She will soon hear another one at the finishing school and decide that New York fashion school is the next satisfactory move.
      Please don’t be a fraud- return the money.

      Delete
    2. Just leave her.. when oga would change his password to his online banking and deduct that money from the money he gives her to run the home that's when she'll come and be crying here on how heartless and wicked he is.. someone that bought her a sewing machine that even made her boss jealous, see his reward for being nice and loving..

      Make she no worry.. she go soon see him other side and start playing the victim card..

      Give a lady a step and she'll take a mile..

      Rubbish

      Delete
    3. Of all the things the chronicle owner wrote, It's actually the, "So i stopped going to her shop because i don't want to have a problem with her" That pissed me off. Like, I don't get it, You used your hard earned money to pay for apprenticeship and went there to listen to gossips,side talks, hear say and was even looking at people's face?? Nne you really really fucked up! At the end of everything, You're still the person at the loosing part because the so called madam is already made and will continue to make her money. You should have ignored everything there and get the knowledge you went there.
      As for your hubby's money that you took, you can sit him down in his good mood, apologize and remind him why you did what you did and tell him you can still return the money if he isn't ok with it. Of course you're doing all of this with a respectful remorseful voice/tone.

      Delete
    4. Egboro ihe Ewu na-eri
      You stopped work because you don't want problem kwo? But you took your husbands money because you want problem πŸ˜’ Apologize to your husband abeg πŸ™.. your husband might not be πŸ’―% supportive but he is trying.. The sewing machine he bought for you shows he wants you to learn.

      Delete
    5. Poster wetin concern you with talk talk, no be work you go kearn? How are you sure it is not those girls gossiping you to your oga,you no use wisdom dere ooo, you come stop wey you pay forπŸ™„πŸ™„πŸ™„ is it the finishing school de won't gossip you now? Maybe Yu have not convinced oga well that you can see that's why he is skeptical about paying for the finishing school, the small one you learnt how far have you gone with it.do you practice at home, do you see for others apart from yourself to get their opinion on how your skills are?

      Delete
    6. *learn not kearn, *sew not see, sorry for the typos

      Delete
    7. To be able to learn and be good at what you are learning madam you need no friend at that place talk more of listening to side talks... You are blessed you have a Goodman don't take it for granted.. and please work on your entitlement mentality and pride!

      Delete
    8. Well said kwikwi and chike.

      Delete
  4. You have no right transferring is money without his consent.

    Return the money back... apologize to him.
    And have a heart to heart talk with him.
    If possible involved your mum to beg him on your behalf.so he can support your dream.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A woman that is not ready to listen to her mom.

      Delete
  5. Madam why must you transfer his money. Stella you are absolutely correct.
    If you know what is good for you return the said cash.
    Lastly madam try to be humble because from your write-up you need to work on yourself.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Madam listen to me and listen good. DO NOT RETURN THE MONEY until he asks you to. Tell him apologise, kneel beg, cry be remorse but dont return it. Both of you will benefit in future for it

      So he had the money and refused to give you??? Why??? Does he want you to steal or do runs. Tell him that this is your passion and this is what will satisfy you in life.
      But coming to think of it why did he not give you? If one good looking babe told him he needed that money to start biz I am sure he will even give it and add more on top sef. Men and thier lies. Abeg dont even try returning that money. You will definitely return it in future

      Delete
  6. Very delicate situation. Taking his money means stealing. But this kind of stealing will benefit everyone in future. Return the money and remain a dependent wife before you get a job or use the money to pay for your tailoring and be termed a thief and also loose all the trust your husband has for you with regards to his phone and money.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. When you are learning a craft, be patient and humble because you have a goal to achieve.
      If you continue like this, your customers will porttttt.

      Delete
    2. Exactly... Humility is key when learning a craft please.

      Delete
  7. Nne return the money, carefully get your little savings together, even if is not this year but let it be something you must do, if you buy #10 meat, reduce to #5. He might not talk, but you won't have access to his phone left alone his money.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Poster, return it since it's not wit his consent. What is wit u and this sewing which u can do on ur own? Abeg return it, na dis reason I carry my husband go efcc.
    Oleeee

    ReplyDelete
  9. You have no cash and also your attitude sucks. You fail to also listen to your mom. Stubborn woman.

    ReplyDelete
  10. You have issues o. How is he not supportive?
    How old are u sef? Apply wisdom o, before one young girl will help u.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. She need to work on herself. She is a problem to her marriage.

      Delete
    2. Seriously, she is a problem in her marriage. What else do you want, he bought industrial machine for you that one no do, you're asking him for money to go to finishing school...

      Delete
    3. She's stressing the man out in a very annoying and ungrateful way.

      Delete
    4. i hate when people adice about relationships end with another person coming in? is it all the time a problem in marriage leads to "one young girl will help you"..stop it. people cannot adice a woman in peace without threatning her with another woman coming in..men go out beause they want to stray period....poster apologise, return his money and promise not to do that again.just appeal to him once again why you need the money and if you are lucky he will send it back to you. I do not take people for granted and i hate it when people treat me like that...Also pls learn to focus on your goals and not mind any distractions. so far the former madam was not planning to kill you, you should hae finished your lessons.

      Delete
  11. Please ignore Stella, she doesnt know what she is talking about. and why did you tell your mother anyways ? so childish.

    If you dont put your eyes in your husbands money, who should?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous thank you for this. All of you are saying return the money.if her husband doesnt give her then who should.

      I can bet you that the guy has given countless people more than that to start up something but your wife doesnt deserve it. This is a hardworking woman that wants to make something of her life and he is saying no.
      Just Negodu!

      Delete
    2. See them..
      Association of thieves.. not even putting eyes in his money but going ahead to steal it.. what if he had plans to use the money foran urgent project the next day..

      See them trying to justify stealing cos they also do it.. shameless lots

      Delete
    3. Her husband is disciplined but she lacks it. I know you and your cohorts do too. She will choose to listen to you but poster believe me if you continue this way you are surely heading for destruction. A word is enough for the wise. Return his money and beg him nicely till he agrees. Be a good wife.

      Delete
  12. Madam,its all shade of wrong. Please return it and watch him do your bidding.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Poster, when he told u that he will give u the money to buy something instead, u should have agreed and collected the money and use it to do what is in your mind. Call him aside, massage his ego by praising him, and telling him how wonderful and supportive he has been, tell him u are sorry for ur actions, that u only wanted to upgrade and learn the reigning styles. Tell him u want to transfer the money back and watch his response.Goodluck

    ReplyDelete
  14. Since he saw the debit alert and didn't say anything, I'll advice you to just talk to him about it and see his reaction. This will make you know if you should return it or just use the money for what you want to use it for.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Stella, women are treated fairly if there is a divorce in Germany, but in Nigeria you are likely to get nothing.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Lol this post reminds me of my own igbese. I told hubby i can do transfer with his phone. He said i should try that i can never do it. Omo i did 50k now he de ask for refund.πŸ˜‚

    madam urs is bad o. Please refund and use smile smile collect the money. For buying u industrial machine at first he is supportive. So stella ur caption de wrong lol

    ReplyDelete
  17. I don't think this is about entitlement mentality but what you did is wrong.return that money as your mum have asked you to do
    So your conscience is not telling you that there is fire on the mountain since he saw the debit alert and did not ask you?return the money

    ReplyDelete
  18. Very wrong to take his money with out his consent. Tell him what you did and ask for forgiveness.

    ReplyDelete
  19. You seem like an unserious person first of all, you left where you were learning because of gossip? Why couldn’t you concentrate on why you started going there in the first place instead of doing amebo up and down.

    Secondly you stole your husband’s money, if it is so easy to make money how come you couldn’t raise it in how many years?
    Better don’t set yourself up for further disrespect, return his money and ask politely till he gives you or reach out to family members to help you raise the funds you need to go to a proper fashion design school.

    I don’t understand why people spend money different times going to road side fashion schools where they’ll learn nothing and still need to go to finishing school, close your eyes and invest in a proper fashion school and learn the foundation properly and you won’t ever need to go to another school to learn finishing or reigning styles.

    ReplyDelete
  20. I believe there are ways you can cajole him to give you the money instead stealing..return his money mbokπŸ™„πŸ™„

    ReplyDelete
  21. If it was a man that did that, hell will let loose. But roles switched now you're asking if you're wrong. Please,return the money. The audacity woman have these days ehn all in the name of he married me na wa o.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Yes you were wrong in STEALING his money but I no dey advice married peeps cos only you know your hubby and why he is refusing. Why not try other ways and stoop to conquer? Stella I agree with you that Nigerian women are generally too dependent on men financially, but also don't you think that him giving her this upfront money to help establish a career would be a sort of financial freedom for her? I think her hubby enjoys the power imbalance and that irks me. My Dad supported my Mum up to masters even wanted her to get a PhD but some men just want their spouse to be financially dependent on them forever. Me I like money so I rather work for mine, than begging anybody but then..

    NB: Anyways, Stella I'm kinda curious on how you and your hubby do your finances, I just want to learn :)

    ReplyDelete
  23. Poster you have a supportive husband. He even bought you an industrial machine! Rather than focus on your work, you went to compete with your trainer. Please humble yourself, you are not the only graduate who is learning hand work. Return your husband money to avoid a bigger chronicle Don't push your quiet husband to the wall!!!

    ReplyDelete
  24. Dear poster ,I won't blame you for leaving where you were learning coz I left the first place after 5 months when my boss is always having issues with me for being a master's degree holder and she a first degree holder always wanting to bring me down before others, some didn't finish JSS 3.One day she told me my presence is making her blood pressure to rise after I had paid #30k out of 40k for a one and half year agreement and it's just 5 months out of it.

    It was a big issue but I already reported her to God and she must pay for it.

    I stopped going and moved elsewhere immediately and it's been a yr now in my new place yet my boss is only an SSCE holder.

    As per the money,pls try to talk to him apologetically,giving him reasons for doing it and if his response is not favourable pls transfer it back.

    Pls go elsewhere and continue your learning.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. thank you...some people dont know the full details of a persons story cos the truth is she might not hae written all but they are quick to judge and throw insults..as for me personally if i want to learn anything i must pay to learn in a school best known for it...all these learning centers where they treat appretinces like house boys and house girls....lol God forbid

      Delete
  25. Replies
    1. Ahn ahn , you go soon call efcc for her now o

      Delete
  26. Pls I don't see it as stealing coz it's a couple we are talking about here and there is no denial anywhere, husband's money is also wife's money.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Replies
    1. God please dont give me this kind of wife.. even if I'm stubborn and being a fool for lov.. don't mind me please.. let it crumble.. I want to live a long and happy life..

      THANKS IN ADVANCE

      Delete
  28. Chai! Poster dear,you didn't do well. You shouldn't have transferred money from his account without his permission.

    You also said he doesn't support you,but I read up there that he got you an industrial sewing machine.

    Go to him and ask for forgiveness since he hasn't said anything about the money you took. Tell him that you're willing to transfer it back if it will make him happy.

    Marriage isn't easy but some problems can be avoided.
    God be with you both.

    ReplyDelete
  29. I feel bad for broke women sha. A full grown adult depending on another adult for finance is never a good thing. Even outsiders will insult you. Chai!

    Women, we need to do better. Have your own source of income before marriage. Not all women are fortunate to be like Amara Kanu.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Trouble dey sleep, iyanga go wake am!

    So poster you mean that your husband has seen the alert and has not said anything and a wise woman is telling you to return the money and you refused?

    Biko... How old are you? Cos it's obvious that you are not wise

    ReplyDelete
  31. Sis do your finishing school online.
    There are a lot you can learn just by watching videos, you already have an idea of the techniques in sewing.

    Only a person who gossips knows a fellow gossips. Stop gossiping with fellow apprentice and face your work

    Finally return that money ,it is wrong. You will just loose your husband trust

    ReplyDelete
  32. Stella for once I totally agree with your red pen Asin totally agree

    ReplyDelete
  33. You see in that your first apprenticeship place, have you thought about the jealous ones being the ones manufacturing what the madam was saying at you back? They did not want to see you compete with them and planned a better way to edge you out.
    Do not listen to everything people say before you hear your servants cursing you. And were you wrong to have transferred that money?
    Yes. Ideally, you both should have access to the account with specified amount, above which both should get alerts. But since that's not the case,
    you should take permission from him before you make such transfers. He hasn't said anything and that is why your conscience is pricking you.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Do you know what you have done? You have given him reasons not to share such details with you again. You stole from him, return his money and apologize!!

    ReplyDelete
  35. So you left because of gossip, Nne you are not ready to learn and you better return your husband's money.

    ReplyDelete
  36. She went to be bragging to her madam that her husband bought her industrial sewing machine and started feeling fly. If you like buy computerised sewing machine, if you are not humble and patient or have an overall attitudinal change to things you would not go far.


    Now draw your two ears!

    1) Stop attaching relevance to material things.

    2) Respect peoples properties/ boundaries even those of family members.

    3) Show everyone you come across respect whether they can afford what you have or not.

    4) Go back to your Madam and continue to learn that sewing where you stopped.

    You are most welcome.

    ReplyDelete

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