Stella Dimoko Saturday In House Gists - Entitlement Mentality In A Relationship/Marriage


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Saturday, October 31, 2020

Saturday In House Gists - Entitlement Mentality In A Relationship/Marriage

 Do you know what entitlement mentality in a relationship is?Do you have entitlement mentality or dating or know someone who has one?

An entitlement mentality says, “You owe me!” It encourages one to demand that you do something for them, give them something, or treat them in a uniquely special way – just because......

If you have entitlement mentality,you must have some or all of the following traits.......

- You impose unrealistic demands on your family, children, friends, acquaintances, lovers, employees, and/or employers.

-You tend to feel sorry for yourself if things don’t work out the way you wanted (self-pity) and openly advertise this in melodramatic, attention-seeking ways.

- People have called you a “bully”, “manipulative”, “ruthless”, “egotistical”, “vain”, or a “liar”.

- You believe that you deserve happiness and go to great, sometimes extreme lengths to ensure that happens, often at the expense of others.

- You punish people when they don’t do what you want either passively (e.g. silent treatment, gossiping, spreading rumors) or aggressively (e.g. shouting, verbally/physically abusing).

- In order to “succeed” in life, you believe in going to any lengths.

- You constantly see other people as competition or “threats”.

- You tend to exhibit many double-standards in the way you behave/interact with other people, e.g. I can be late and forget my duties and commitments, but YOU can’t; I can treat myself, but YOU can’t; I can abuse or disrespect you, but YOU can’t to ME.

-You tend to take more than give in friendships and relationships.

- You tend to look out for yourself, your needs and desires more than anyone else almost 100% of the time.

- You have a hard time negotiating or compromising.

- You have a deep-seated conviction that you have priority and should always come first, even at the expense of stepping on others.

- People always seem to be offended or upset by what you do or say.

- You generally think that you are better, or more important than other people and other people should see this and unquestioningly respect you.

- You crave admiration and adoration.

- You like to assert your dominance or superiority over other people, finding it second nature.

Lets gist...


  1. This one pass sense of entitlement, these are the traits and attributes of a self absorbed human or narcissist.

    1. Thank you! That was what i thought too. Narcissist alert.

    2. I don't know if my husband is a narcissist or just feeling entitled because he paid bride price,or he just want a slave instead of a wife.Am constantly remanded that he trained me in the university,feeding me, so something as little as going to friends house in my vicinity. I didn't know I have to pay with my life

  2. All those you mentioned up there Stella is more than one with the entitlement mentality. One can feel entitled to an extent without all these traits mentioned biko.

  3. Stella dem plenty for here na.

    1. Lol...They plenty in the world. Is not just here

    2. Lmao..too plenty abeg.
      Some are entitled for respect from others but don't give it to others.

      Some are entitled to your money but keep their own even hide it.

      Some are entitled to being fawned upon and showed care and you asking after them and welfare but won't bother reciprocating.

      Even entitled people will come here now and call others entitled.

      My own is if you expect me to give you to reciprocate when i want that same thing too else....

    3. I taught am th only one that saw this.

      Please behave yourself
      Destinies are differs
      Answering names of people that have made it in life or that have talented specially by God will change things in your life. Hmmmmmm 😳😳😳

  4. Nah, the last thing I have is that entitlement mentality. If I ask you for something and u cant give me, I would never get upset about that

  5. I have lived with an entitled narcissist. I feel sorry for anyone who come across such a person.

    When i notice you want princess treatment and you don't return the favour. E don be for you be dat
    I have met someone like you before affliction shall not arise a second time.

    1. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚@ affliction shall not rise a second time.

  6. I know some people that are guilty of this

  7. My slogan is nobody owes me anything, not even my family.
    Whatever is done I show uttermost appreciation , cos whatever anyone does for me is out of their good will.

  8. Having a family especially with kids involved has really changed me alot. Before I got married, I find it difficult to ask people for help for personal use, I can go extra length to help others but I find it difficult to ask for assistance when I'm in need, ordinary to call a friend or boyfriend to send me airtime is difficult for me to do. I remembere 2009 while I was an Audit trainee with an accounting firm at Ketu, Lagos, I had to trek from Ketu to Agege just because I don't have money, and to ask my manager for iou or my colleagues for some money is such a big issue for me, I believe nobody owes me anything. All that has changed now, I don't feel entitled but I always ask or seek for help when necessary.

    1. Wait hollup you trekked from ketu to Agege? Do you the distance or you just want to write something? I'm not doubting you but it sounds unbelievable.

  9. A girl you are dating tells you:

    -If you can't provide 20k monthly for my creams or cosmetics, then it's over

    - if you can't give me 10k weekly upkeep money, I'll call it quit

    - if you can't take care of me financially, then you are not worthy of my love

    And if you are not a millionaire and have a good job, l can't marry you.

    Na them. Entitled lot. Guys if you come across them, run. They are women who don't know the meaning of ride or die and won't give you peace of mind when you marry them

    I'm outtie

    1. ok so she should be the one to feed the man abi? i maybe wrong ohhh but i dont want to marry a liability. who ever i marry must have a job and side hustles. A few months ago i met a guy and all of a sudden he started telling me about how he wanted to do his PHD and how it would cost him N20M to do it in the abroad, we were not even up to a month in our discussions when he asked me to borrow him money. I avoided him because if i was the one asking for money i would be called a gold digger. Plus a man should approach the kind of lady he can afford and not approach one he cant afford. I mean i am trying to rise up in life so why should i lower my standards. Its not entitlement personality, it is self love.

  10. Anyone that has 50% of the traits mentioned above can kill and should be avoided.

  11. This reminds me of my ex. Dude's entitlement mentality stinks real bad! February, he had a wedding to attend and was part of the agbada boys, he didn't plan himself on time just for him to ask me for urgent 5k to balance his tailor dying minute. I didn't have at that time and I got cold treatment for that. I will call him and he won't pick or return my call, send chats and he would respond after hours with one word response. He started trying to make me feel guilty that i couldn't help out..
    Las las, he finally got the balanace from someone else. I couldn't be bothered how he got it. We finally shortly after that and I felt relieved.

  12. Some feel entitled to greeting. I say hello to you whenever we meet, and now it's my duty to always greet you ba? This thing can annoy me eh, I greet both young and old, but if whenever we see you're looking at my mouth to be greeted first, I'll so ignore you, that's after I must have greeted you a couple of times, especially when you're not an ELDER.

    1. Firstlady blessing31 October 2020 at 16:38

      I tell you,this one tire me
      Intact I just overlook most of them now

  13. I dont believe asking love ones(brother, sister,mother, father, husband, wife) for help is entitlement mentality.
    2ndly it depends on how you handle rejection, if there is not bad blood, bad energy, anything that looks vengeful, then its ok.
    But if I ask my husband for help and I know he is capable of rendering that help, but for some reasons that are not serious and maybe out of selfish thinking he doesnt just want then im definitely going to make a case out of it,like I'm giving him a piece of my mind.😁 e no mean say we dey quarel but I go tell am bobo you no try. To me that is not entitlement mentality, afterall we are helpmeet to eachother,if he is capable and won't just do, does he expect me to go meet outsiders? Of does he really care about my welfare?
    This reminds me of the chronicle of the lady that stole money from her husbands account, the wrong she did was stealing.
    Her man was selfish, ,the situation is like you applying for a job and you know someone close that can throw in some good words that will really matter for you but the person simply doesn't want to,for selfish reasons such situation you just face God only... afterall we humans on earth are the ones God uses to lift others, He ain't coming down from his throne to help us.
    That's my point and its clearly not entitlement issshhh!

    1. Your last paragraph is 😘😘😘😘🍷😍😍😍😍🍷🍷🍷🍷

  14. My husband that feels entitled to food even when his eating is unpredictable (when there is food, he won't eat, the moment there is no food..he wants to eat). This is just messed up and I can't even explain it enough for people to understand.

    Shouting like an agbero because he doesn't want to repeat what he ate in the afternoon this night. So tired of this nonsense!

    1. That's a power play to psychologically subdue you. Here's what you do to win...
      If he provides adequately for the homefront, find a caterer that can help prepare those usual suspect meals, put in opaque plastic bowls & freeze. When he requests, take your time defrosting it and serve as if you just made it. Serve with a smile as if you enjoy the task & watch him lose interest in punishing you this way as he can no longer derive satisfaction from fustrating you.
      Conversely, you can leave him dinner of your choice on the dining table with a note to pop it in the microwave & go to bed early. That way, he cannot complain you don't feed him.
      You are a person who had dreams bigger than spending half your life in some manipulative man's kitchen. Calculate all the time you have spent and will still spend cooking so many nitpicky, unnecessary meals. If you invest that time in yourself, you will know what your purpose is.
      Keep your home & marriage but do not lose your sanity, dignity or self-respect to do so. A good man wouldn't put you through that.

  15. My husband feels everyone on earth is here to make sure he is ok.He wants what he wants,when and how he wants it.Very entitled Nd self absorbed.To be honest, i think he's a narcissist.

  16. Entitlement is chima a. Someone who took my card 3 months into our marriage, input the card details and only called me after the fact, as the OTP would be sent to my mobile device. Money I saved up years before I met him.
    Silly me did good wife & told him. Only to see another debit transaction immediately after.
    Always borrowing from me & asking me to make transfers for him. He earns but can't account for his money, won't even let me see his atm card, tried to isolate me from everyone & used cold shoulder to try to manipulate me.
    Once I stopped giving him a free pass & stood up to him, the coward threatened my life.
    I reported to the authorities and left his sorry and damaged behind.
    I am getting over it and a lot happier now


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