Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog visitor Narrative

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Wednesday, December 30, 2020

Chronicle Of Blog visitor Narrative

Hmmmm.....







STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
COMPLICATED



I left when l could not stand the beating and emotional violence.

 He curses me and my generation at any given opportunity for being a man (infertile) in his house. This ex dealt with me . 

Disconnected me from anyone called friend and family. The peak was when he left me for months only to hear he rented another house and moved in with his supposed pregnant girlfriend who threatened my life for blocking her from coming to birth her child in my house. 


My world came crumbling. I became single again, lonely and depressed. 

During the lockdown, people flood a nearby field from 5am - 8am for exercise. I decided to join to ease stress.I met him and we started talking in the field and became friends. Always ready to listen and encourage me.


 December 1st he visited as usual in the evening. In the course of our discussion. I remembered my past marital experience and cried out loud.. He held me and shed tears too while consoling me. He stayed with me throughout the night. Boom. We had sex. This is after 4 years of abstaining from sex.


 When he came down. I resumed in tears. Felt empty and worthless. He promised it will never happen again. I went back to my shell and went into depression again. My nights were always filled with tears and worry. I pleaded for forgiveness from God. 


He calls to know how am doing but I was no more interested in his friendship. Had to block him. I needed Gods mercy to carry on. 

he came again. In the spirit of Christmas. I allowed him in. He pleaded for us to reconcile and go back to our friendship zone before the s#x incidence that separated us. Boom another s#x again. 

Oh. He did not force or rape me. 

Tears have been flowing uncontrollably since he left. God please where are you?. I am tired. I want to be FREE. Can't l have my own man?. I am tired of sinning against you with my body. I can't even pray again because of my conscience. Not gone to church since the first s#x. Oh lord l need you. Help me out. I can't help myself. 

He is separated but not divorced. I knew what l went through when hubby left me for another woman. I can't wish it for another woman. I need serious deliverance and mercy from God.


 I have sworn it is over between us but l don't trust myself anymore. Please keep your curse to yourself. If you know serious believing and deliverance church make u tell me. I stay in one of the four big cities in Nigeria.





*You enjoyed s#x and you feel guilty?wow....
Are you the one that caused their break up?Your problem has nothing to do with deliverance abeg,enjoy your relationship with man and stop feeding yourself with guilty conscience after you don twist waist twerk for bed...LOL

70 comments:

  1. This one is not'deliverance' issue, you are emotionally messed up and until you make up your mind to move on, you may keep repeating this circle even with another man.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Work on your emotions, hope you guys use protection sha to avoid another wahala.

      Delete
    2. Do you know the place of sex in your mental health as a woman? It is a NEED. Your choice of partner might not be ideal but girl, you have NEEDS that if you do not settle, you can't be balanced, you can't function optimally, you will find it difficult to be kind, you will lash out like a scorpion at the slightest provocation, you will age and look haggard fast, you will be a very unpleasant person to be around, your confidence level will depleat and even in your prayers your words are only going to be produced in self pity, lamentations and self condemnation. God created sex for adults. He didn't create it to be sold but for our mental health. If sex was purely for married people, God is not powerless to make you crave it only after dotted lines are signed and vows exchanged. He would have killed desire for it once someone's partner dies or leaves.

      Take care of yourself. Ensure to keep your body and soul together. Don't starve any.

      Delete
    3. Words on marble, Sapphire πŸ‘

      Delete
    4. Sapphire you're a star 🌟🌟🌟. Madam, like Stella said free yourself of guilt, you don't need deliveranceπŸ₯΄, ask the guy where the relationship is leading too. He can't just come and be osho freeing and cleaning mouth, waka dey go.
      Know his intentions, if he's not giving it a trial then let him go 🀷🏽‍♂️

      Delete
    5. Saphire, WRONG, WRONG, WRONG!!!

      Sex is for marriage not mental health.

      God made humans free moral agents with the right to choose and He won't force anything on anyone.

      Delete
    6. I love you sapphire. πŸ˜˜πŸ’•

      Delete
    7. Sapphire No No No. you don’t have to always comment you know??? I completely disagree with your comment abeg. Next

      Delete
    8. Sapphire , don't be stupid with your lewd comment. Stop deceiving people on this blog. Though you are entitled to your views but pls you must not deceive people with your wayward lifestyle.Its not the best life to live. Jumping from one bed to another does not give fulfillment in life.

      Delete
    9. Sapphire, if only it were that easy. Sex creates soul ties, there is nothing casual about it. U can get up after sex with a life altering std or even a whole human growing inside you. Yes We as humans have needs n I am tempted to side with you to feel less shameful about my past sexual sins but religious stand point aside, having sex all willy nilly before marriage takes a toll on your soul whether you wanna admit or not. Say u have a bf n u have sex then he messes up, u get another man have sex so on so forth. U have a piece of those men battling inside you, confused bonds you made with them weighing down your soul. Why do u think some ppl cheat with ex bf or find it difficult to move on even after marrying someone else.If u search deep down, casual sex ain't the best. That's if u wanna be honest with yourself o. If u lucky enough to meet sleep with n marry your first bf then good.

      Delete
    10. Sapphire, abeg don't promote such.

      Madam be open for love and pray
      for a better man to pay for your bride price. God will see you. I can't curse or judge you but stop punishing yourself, love yourself and be focus.

      Delete
  2. The "strongest deliverance church" that I know is your bible/prayer/fasting.
    Yes; Godly sorrow brings about repentance (2 Cor. 7:10). When David committed adultery with Bathsheba, what did he do, he fasted for 7 days.
    He picked himself up and continued to live and worship his God. Did God chastise him? Yes, he did.
    Did David do it again? No he did not. Why? Because he has learnt to discipline the flesh through fasting and the Word of God. Did David pray?
    Of course; Psalms 51 Cast me not away from your presence O Lord (that's vs. 11)..
    People make this mistake of moving away from God instead of going closer to him when they fall into sin.
    His love never fails. πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So true. In addition. You need time to heal and move on. You’re not the first. Thank God you are walking free. Some women are in worse bondage than you. Don’t kill yourself cos you had sex. Stay close to God. He will help you.
      Love and hugs dearie

      Delete
    2. Madam, you better dust yourself and get a good man. Your ex-husband is gone, moved on and not coming back. Give yourself sense, ask this new guy what he wants. If he just wants to be licking sugar and cleaning mouth then let him go so you can find someone else.
      Time waits for no one.

      Delete
  3. Poster what you need is discipline and not deliverance..Start by telling yourself some home truths and make deliberate efforts if you want that man out of your life or not...Start by first forgiving yourself before you can ask God to forgive you...Do you really love this guy? Do you want him as a friend, fuckmate or partner..You just can't run away from it, you need to define what you want happening between both of you..I will advise you leave your environment first and go to a place where you can clear your head and decide what you want!! No one can make that decision for you!!! Be calming down ok...All the best...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Phoenix all I can say is the lady is confused and still in love with her ex-husband. We can all tell you to go for deliverance but are you ready to be delivered. Look at how you are suffering yourself over a broken relationship of 4years while the man has moved on without looking back.

      You better dust yourself up and try to live a meaningful life devoid of regrets then you can begin to heal.

      Lovelace

      Delete
  4. It's obvious you are not a baby. So why not define your relationship with him and set clear boundaries. It's obvious you like him for you to let him have sex with you but you need to be sure of what you want exactly. And if you don't want to have sex before you settle down again(if you ever consider that), then you need to let your prospective man know.
    I also think what you need is to seek help professionally, you may not enjoy your next relationship if you don't deal with the trauma you went through in your previous marriage. Also, if you are a Christian and believe in God, ask for His help to go through the pain and heal completely. He is ever ready to help if we seek Him diligently. You will surely be fine and I wish you all the best.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Stella, this lady said she feels guilty, why encourage her to continue in sexual immorality. Guilt kills. Every body ailment can develop from guilt. Any doctor know what is called "somatization."
    You used to encourage people to say away from pre-marital sex, so what happened?
    She can still enjoy her relationship with this man without being sexually involved and loading herself with guilt, can't she?

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  6. I won't do whatever makes me guilty. Point blank.

    ReplyDelete
  7. My face the whole time reading this chronicle πŸ™„πŸ™„πŸ™„πŸ˜πŸ˜

    ReplyDelete
  8. Poster, what you need is to FLEE *the source* of your sexual temptation NOT DELIVERANCE.

    Please, AVOID visits from this man and serve God.

    ReplyDelete
  9. My daddy taught me long ago that whenever a woman is crying, do not put hands on her to console her, it most times than not ends in sexual intercourse. Especially if you are alone with her. It has saved me a lot.
    Madam, you have to discipline yourself in fasting if you want to avoid falling into sin multiple times.

    ReplyDelete
  10. You are looking for who Will encourage you in your adventures. While, here it is. You can go on and enjoy the sex, after all the guy's prick is twisting your brain, and maybe the orgasm is still a memory.

    Nobody should enter 2021 with this type of story!
    Own up to your shit.
    You blocked him! You unblocked him, and later met with him in the private.
    No amount of deliverance will affect you,cause you have not really made up your mind.

    ReplyDelete
  11. You’re mentally, emotionally weak, hurt and exhausted. If you meet another guy, you’ll definitely bang him again. you need time to heal for your own mental sanity. And yes include God and prayers along. Don’t let this married man take advantage of your vulnerability again. Just stop please. Continue your exercise as it will give you that mental boost and positive mood. See a therapist if you have the money, get closer to friends and family for emotionally support as you went through a lot in your marriage. You really need that emotional support to avoid serious depression. Go to your family house for some time if you have to. Overall, work on your self esteem and regain your life. Wishing you all the best.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Stella twist waist kwa .....ha ma fellow bvs, I can officially tell u all DAT Stella have spoil.........

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣 Stella have spoil no be today nau

      Delete
  13. Madam try and make up your mind and don't give in that chance to him again. Learn to trust yourself ok.

    ReplyDelete
  14. I’m not sure I understand this story. Are you single or not? I thought your husband left?

    What are you feeling guilty about exactly?

    ReplyDelete
  15. You are your own pastor, talk to God about everything, make up your mind to stop sinning and you'll be fine. Forgive yourself too so you can have peace and be able to pray.

    It's all about discipline. You need to set boundaries and tell any man you want to date your rules, if not, you'll keep going in a circle. I wish you well.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Lol..
    Wetin be this nah..

    Shey you know you're the toxic one in this your new entanglement. If bobo had blocked you after banging the first time, using his separated relationship as an excuse how would you feel?

    You're just tutoring and cheating yourself, while in the process making someone else life complicated, as if the country isn't complicated enough.. what were you thinking being his friend in the first place.. abi you no see babes weh come exercise for the field to be friends with..

    For an adult, you're sure acting like a teenage girl.. all those girls weh their brain never develop finish..

    Please just leave boom out of it, boom ko broom ni.. after you don kpakurumo finish

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚I can't believe I'm agreeing with Dante. @Poster, we are about to enter 2021; better put on your big girl pants, own your shit and take charge. Life is too short to wish your happiness away. I bet you're still holding on to the sham of a marriage that ended over 4 years ago just to satisfy society...mrs married but living single. Don't put unnecessary pressure on your self. 'Adulting' in these streets no easy mhen but God is merciful. No be Havilah clothing marry again which day. However, take baby steps by first loving yourself before rushing into another relationship...

      Delete
  17. Poster,you do not need any spiritual deliverance ehhh,before man of God will lay hands on your shoulder and gbensh will happen again.abstanance is about self control.forgive yourself ,speak to God you don't want to do it again ,define your relationship with the man,cos they like free things a lot o.He will come for new year gift again if you are not careful.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Dear, it is good that you feel remorseful about the act and you've spoken to God about it. But now, you've got to trust God that He has forgiven you, so you need to stop beating yourself up but instead go and sin no more.
    I'm not sure deliverance is the answer here. I think you need help to recover from the trauma you have already been through, you probably need a trusted person to be accountable to about your intimate life.
    Please do not go into anymore close friendship or relationship with the opposite sex until you have healed indeed.
    A Bible believing church, very sound with the Word will do you some good too, however, the bulk of the growth you desire will eventually fall on you. You need to study the Word too and be a person of the HolySpirit.

    Receive strength Dear.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Madam you did nothing wrong, enjoy your life,you've denied your body for long, but guard your heart,don't fall yet

    ReplyDelete
  20. Madam poster, my own be say this guy go give you belle. Be very careful in this kinda relationship, so that it won't end in double wahala

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If she wants a child and she feels he is good enough to be a sperm donor, let her enjoy the sex, get pregnant and move on. The only consideration is for her to be able to take care of the child without a dime from the man. If she can do this, then, get pregnant if you want to.

      Delete
    2. Anon 17:53. You’re so damn selfish. So the child does not need a father figure in his or her life??? Also you think it’s easy caring for a child yourself? Ridiculous comment!!

      Delete
  21. I don't know how some people thinks,it's been 4yrs, spread your legs and fuck with protection and your eyes open,let him
    Define your relationship with him and be confident enough to attract a better partner than the previous one. Don't let your emotions becloud your ability to find a good man. This your cry cry will lead you to another man that will take advantage of your vulnerability. Sometimes sex isn't that bad. I wish you good luck and besides find out why he got separated from his spouse and give him some space,also thread with caution

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly!!! move on, enjoy the sex, feel sexy, set goals, achieve them, get married if you want to. Ultimately, it's your life and you should live it on your own terms and not according to what others say or feel.

      Delete
  22. This is not a question of if she enjoys sex with the friend or not. This woman is clearly broken and her supposed friend is taking advantage of that.
    Poster avoid that man, he's not a friend. Avoid him before he sends you into a deeper problem. If you should have sex, it should be on your own terms, when you will enjoy it and feel no guilt. You don't need deliverance, what you need is believing in yourself and trusting that, you are enough and no one can make you happy except you. You must believe that, God loves you and sees you worthy to create you on this earth hence you have the right to live and have the good things of this life just like anybody else. You are not beneath anyone hence you must raise your head high as you pursue your goals. Mind you, your goals shouldn't be being married. For you can only enjoy your marriage if you find yourself, know your value and what you add to the marriage. For this matter my dear, be determine to know what gives you joy, what you enjoy doing and how can it help society and monitise that thing to pay you. Pray to God for guidance and believe in the capabilities God has given you. You will be fine but get rid of that man and put your emotions on check 1st.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. How do you people blame men for all your issues in life please? How is this the man’s fault? So the man is not broken? Na wa

      Delete
    2. AdaBekee, please you sound so uninformed and very limited. Kindly leave your comment and stop attacking mine for it's clearly beyond your comprehension. Thank you!

      Delete
    3. Let men kuku leave this world for una. Always finding ways to blame them even when they're guilty. Gosh!!
      Was she forced to have sex with him? You just open your gutter waaaaa

      Delete
  23. I think you should pull yourself together, confess to God and believe He has forgotten. Then, stop him from coming to your place and mingle with others of both sexes. E-hugs dear

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This is reasonable advice

      All those shouting whine waist with protection

      Fear GOD
      It is not everyone who can pretend that it is not a sin to commit formication

      Delete
  24. I think you should pull yourself together, confess to God and believe He has forgotten. Then, stop him from coming to your place and mingle with others of both sexes. E-hugs dear

    ReplyDelete
  25. I hope you know he took advantage of your vulnerability, what is all this crying upandan for? Move on! 4 years is a long time.

    Are you still waiting for your husband to come back to his senses after treating you shabbily? Come of it jare

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He obviously took advantage of her and it will continue that way.

      Delete
  26. Poster live a little.Stop the self guilt trip!that ain't God. you are obviously depressed,so what ever you are going into with that man will either stabilize you or mess you up! I advice you don't take this relationship seriously, you can be FWB for the moment.Good sex is actually therapeutic,but you must acknowledge it for what it is, just good sex ,so don't pressure yourself or partner the way you are doing now!

    ReplyDelete
  27. You were an emotional wreck, crying and your so called friend took advantage of you. No rational man will ever do that. He will continue to take advantage of you. I hate weak men who are not disciplined enough to control themselves. Stay away from that guy, he is not a friend, can never be. He knows your weaknesses and how to manipulate you for sexual gains. 4 years is move than enough to move on from whatever happened in your marriage, stop dwelling in the past. Life is short, get a grip of yourself and live to the fullest. Tomorrow is not promised to anybody.

    Alexander

    ReplyDelete
  28. I swear..Abeg calm.down else you develop high BP.U carry religion for had yet u no fit hold body dey go.u can meet that man else where. Restaurant, fast food joints , gardens, church or the field.stop that your cries and buckles up your life.Free your self for once and enjoy.No love man pass your life .you deserve to be happy

    ReplyDelete
  29. Poster, you need to be strong and move on please. it's okay if you having feelings for someone else. I married a divorcee, however, I met him when he was only separated form his wife. I did my findings and I had peace with the results. We have been together for 10 years now.

    You need to be happy again, enjoy the warm hands of another man. Get over your ex and move on with your life.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Please forgive yourself first of all, and if possible find a trusted friend or family member to rant out to. You just need to express your emotions and ease your burden. And God is not mad at you, remain steadfast in prayer even when you feel unworthy or that he doesn't hear. He listens and he is with you. However, it will be difficult to be just friends with someone you have had sex with, especially with all the guilt you feel about him given that he is not divorced. Just block him and let him go. He could go back to his wife tomorrow. However, if you must remain friends, avoid the occasions that lead to sin. Being alone with him led to the sex right? So avoid that. Meet in public, at a park or restaurant. Not alone and not at night. Good luck!

    ReplyDelete
  31. That gbenshing will lead to pregnancy..... Mark my words!

    ReplyDelete
  32. Poster, yes you need your pipes activated. Yes ! You need a plumber to clean your vaginal pipes. After 4 years why the tears? Let him bang the memories of your ex off your brains jare. How woman go see coded gbola and e go still dey cry dey remember which kain yeye ex. stop the silly tears.

    ReplyDelete
  33. So you want to die because you had sex with a man? I say this as some one who has been celibate for over 20 years by the way. You've asked for forgiveness with a genuine heart and God has heard you. You now need to forgive yourself and heal from your ex husband. There is a possibility that you may never remarry or have a child. What would you do then? Are you not entitled to be happy? Please dry your eyes and guard your emotions. Never ever tell any man friend what you have been through. When you do that you hand them your mumu button manual. It is well.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You've been celibate for 20yrs?,lmao,sex is a healthy part of life.please live your life complete,its therapeutic;I'm sure you're one grumpy woman,lol.

      Delete
  34. madam. flex oo. u no kill person, na leave dem leave u.. some pple are even praying for opportunity to hv pple come visit them, even if its its for enjoyment only. relax

    ReplyDelete
  35. Gather yourself together and heal first before anything, you are emotionally down and the guy is filling that space. If you want to stop the din forgive yourself, forgive he mistake you make.

    Move from your past.

    ReplyDelete
  36. Hmmm. Your marriage is over, then you sleep with a married man (yes, MARRIED, forget that separation nonsense) thereby causing havoc in another woman's life.

    Sorry but if your gist gets outside, you'll look like the bad person.

    On a serious note, the man is not your friend. He's taking advantage of your vulnerable state. Avoid him. When his wife finds out about you, hmm....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Truly

      Forgive yourself
      Ask GOD for forgiveness
      You need strength get it from GOD
      Block him
      Ask GOD what to do next

      Delete
  37. Its either the man does not gbensh well or he is broke. Kindly let him go or find out more about his separation and his intention. He might not be an opportunist, he might genuinely care about you. Stop overanalysing when you get your facts and just enjoy the relationship.

    ReplyDelete

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