Stella Dimoko Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative


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Sunday, January 31, 2021

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative



Hi Stella.

Please I need urgent advice from you and BVs.

I'm a working mum of 3 girls. My youngest girl is 3+ and the eldest is in JS1.

My hubby's Uncle has a son aged 9 and he usually does after school in my house cos of my help that watches them all. The kids love to have him around. 

Sometime in 2019 he came around and as they were playing, I noticed he kept going into hiding with my then 5 year old daughter. Then I finally saw him trying to forcefully touch her privates though they were both fully clothed. I reacted and punished/cautioned them both. I constantly educate my kids on sex and how its improper to allow people in your privates so I was somewhat disappointed in my daughter that day.

Fast forward to recently, he was in my house after school and I happened to work from home that day. Meanwhile i do get reports on how he is violent to my kids sometimes but I always warned my girl to keep them in separate rooms any time such happens. 

His mum cautions him when she gets the reports too.

Back to the main issue. So on this day I was working from home. They came back from school and the girls were about having their bath. My youngest was awaiting her turn and running around naked. I noticed the boy's shorts kept pulling down and he was pulling it back up when I looked but I dismissed it as a loose clothing. Although when I sat in the sitting room for a while it stayed on .I then asked my girl to tie a towel around my daughter and went to take a work call.

 I noticed everywhere went silent immediately. Then I sneaked out only to find my daughter sitting on the floor (still naked, apparently my girl forgot to tie the towel) and the boy was standing over her and using his leg to touch her privates.

I reacted immediately and gave him a slap then asked him to go kneel down until his mum comes.

I called hubby and he said let's wait for his mum to react.

 She came and the son started crying. She said they're just being kids and probably don't know what they're doing. She asked her son what happened and he couldn't talk. Was just hugging his mum. She kept saying she's sure he doesn't understand what he did. But maybe she would have to start taking him to after school centres.My daughter was indifferent and acting normal. I cautioned her as well.

 Hubby came home and I told him everything. He suggestion was that going forward they should stay in separate rooms. That eventually his uncle's wife will get the message. He didn't push on the woman's suggestion of after school centre. Truly I was disappointed by hubby's suggestion cos I felt it's just too lame. I said nothing though. By the way he used to live with his uncle since he left secondary school till 4 years before we met.

Now I feel maybe I overreacted, or maybe the boy's mum is right that it's just kids stuff. I'm so confused and my mind is playing games on me.

Please advise.

*Your hubby is trying not to get on his Uncles bad book...It is understandable but please do not take this lightly,that boy has been exposed to sexual content and wants to try it out,do not let your daughter become a victim of sexual abuse,he will keep trying until they grow older and might end up using force....stay Woke...

You did not over react!


  1. Please keep that boy far away from your daughters before he sexually abuses them.

    It's better you are in your uncle's bad books with safe and protected kids than play this down and disappoint your young girls.

    He needs to stay away.

    1. I wonder why some people would rather displease themselves just to satisfy some people because of one thing or the other.
      Madam poster you didn't over react oo and mind you female child need more attention so as not to mess up her mind

    2. Your girls should stay 50 million miles away from that boy. I'm sure the boy was molested by someone close to him and now used to it,so he wants to try it on other children. The mother of the boy,should have a one on one with him,and get to the bottom of his sick behaviour.

    3. There are some stuff you don't pretend about it because not the aftermath effect....

      There's no need to pretend about this and you're not over reacting....

      Please you people should stick to the uncle's wife suggestion of using after school centres....

      Let that boy stay far from your girls...

    4. I can't believe you still let the boy into your home after the first incident,for me he won't step into my house again,that would have been my stand,I dey vex for you self.

    5. My dear, be alert and also educate the boy too.

    6. Proudly feminsit31 January 2021 at 22:21

      I am very angry with this chronicles. Exactly this happened to my kid, my sister's son was under blanket with my daughter. This boy is same type like the one here, very violent kid and probably exposed to sexual content, only god knows. I came home and my daughter was seen in same room with the boy who was still under the blanket, I knew something was off. I asked my daughter, pls dont lie to me, what happened while I was gone. She said the boy was rubbing her back underneath the blanket, I was mad. I shouted on my sister. How come you are home and you allowing the kids under the blanket, what rubbish is this. Please take your sons and leave my house abeg. Me I dont take nonsense with my daughter's sexual exposure in childhood, dont want an over stimulated girl, because it makes them become very sexual in their teenage years, thats when you hear this girl having sex with all the boys in the street. It's all due to stuff like this happened to the early. Your husband doesn't value his happiness, you better stop that boy coming over. I dont care, or stay at home and watch them like a hawk. That your maid is slacking, sack her already. Stella pls post

    7. protect your kids, woman

      if your hubby does not discipline that boy don't allow him into your home again!

  2. A mother's instinct is hardly ever wrong. But where you were probably wrong is to instruct your daughters; "don't do this, do this, stop this..."
    Such instructions as you have found out is useless when it comes face to face with sensual desires. The flesh, that sinful human nature loves it; the touches, the kisses, the real deal.
    But what should we as humans do? Psalms 119:9 How can a young person keep his way pure except by giving heed to your word!
    If you do not teach your kids the Word of God, the Holy Bible but always expect them to conform to moral norms and codes, you will be disappointed just like in this case.
    The Word of God is the power to resist sin. Yes. And to teach them, you have to read it yourself and know him; Jesus.

    1. what rubbish are you saying she was wrong? if you read the word will you not also put it into practice by telling the kid to be aware? she is still a child and still learning which is a continuous process.

  3. You people are too lackadaisical. The moment you saw him trying to forcefully put his hand into your daughter's private was the day he should have left the house. His mother claiming he knows nothing is just an enabler and acting dumb. He knows nothing but smart enough to know the way to female genitals? Very hilarious! Why were you dissapointed at your innocent daughter when you caught him trying to force his way into her genital? Did she take his hand there? Please be disappointed in yourself and your husband that that boy is still in your house. When you have kids especially when it seems you have a molester under your roof you become selfish and ruthless as parents to curb rubbish before it escalates. Show your husband this post and let him know he has to be selfish for his kids if his uncle wants to get upset he should get upset. You and your husband be vexing pesin. You both better wake up before it is too late. You keep beating the boy whenever he gets caught but he keeps repeating it but una never learn?

    1. Thanks for the gospel truth.
      She and her husband be vexing person is more like it.

      The day she stays out for too long, he'll mount their daughters and practice what's in his head.

      BTW...once caught a friend's son peeping at my daughters showering, told his mum and she started giving me an attitude, I just circled her person, 3 years down the line they've not visited again and we're not talking sef.
      I no send o.

      If you plant flowers and fail to water it, hold on to your flower.
      Not in my home. Laye!

    2. Xhlrted ❤️ You did well..πŸ‘

    3. Anon, you nailed it... Something that should be taken lightly is what they are busy rubbing pomade on....


    4. My mom was a tigress when it came to all these things o. But she didnt stop at telling me not to do so and so. She went as far as telling me the consequences of what will happen. Kids need to understand the bad effects that will result from such actions early on in life with a relative no less - pregnancy, u get shunned, u can't pursue ur dreams, in bed kids with birth defects etc etc. If possible also watch family movies with ur kids that show case all these kinds of lessons. Then it was Super story and others for me. N my mom also warned me about being alone in rooms with uncles, sitting ok their laps etc so I was proactive and wary of older men growing up. It helps.

      It's not enough to tell her not to do it because admittedly as kids we are curious about our bodies and the world around us . Also that boy needs to be banned from your house. The safety of your immediate family should trump any yeye good Graces that you are trying to stay in.

      I know what I am saying because I know of a family where the boy and girl cousins were allowed to sleep in the same room and the guy was sleeping with the girl for years so tey she even aborted pregnancy for him several times. And noone knew about it until she decided to come clean after the guy died and she got married. it went from rape to consensual incest, the guy was even saying rubbish that the girl was his destined wife according to prayers. Act now and fast before your daughter suffers serious emotional trauma and scarring that will affect her development.

    5. I wish I know her na to report all of them to child protection agency

  4. Dear mother hen, you are not over reacting but doing the right thing. Please do everything you can to protect your daughter. If at this age he is like this, be assured your daughter is not safe anywhere near him even when she is 18 years whether in your home, theirs or anywhere. The human mind is desperately wicked and the devil just needs a split second to achieve his goal.

  5. Madam!! pls stop that boy from coming to your house!! Yes, i am angry!!!

  6. When it comes to sexual abuse, no look face o, I prefer to become an enemy of the state than take sexual abuse lightly.

  7. Poster,you're not overreacting o!Please do everything within your power as a mother to protect your children regardless of whose ox is gored.Any harm done cannot be undone!

  8. You did not overreact. Insist they take him to an after school center and also talk to your girl. The world is not normal anymore so as parents we need to stay sharp and woke like a hawk! No body help you born your pikin!

  9. Haa. If na me ehn,
    1 family meeting. Must hold.
    2The boy must stop coming over unaccompanied,
    My help must feel my anger.
    Infact everything go burn.
    Your daughter is no longer protesting and you're here asking jamb questions.
    Oga o.
    Make sure he hasn't finished experimenting with your older daughters sef hian!.
    I don't even get it. Is this the memories you want your daughter to have?

    1. JUKWA YA O! 🀷‍♀️

  10. Madam poster, please listen to and obey your mothering instincts; don't allow that boy play with your kids again! He should stop coming to your house.

    You don't allow the things that will hurt you near you. God gave you your precious kids and He expects you to fight for them, defend them and be their voice until they are of age.

    Don't allow anyone guilt trip you into allowing anyone destroy your kids lives. He was caught now, next time, you might not be there to catch them in the act.

    Please, protect your kids and continue to give them sex education. It is very important.

    As for your hubby, he's just playing safe because he grew up with his uncle and most probably, doesn't want to offend him by taking drastic action against the child. Let your husband know the implications of that boy staying around your daughters.

  11. Please do all you must to protect your daughters, you didn’t overreact, that boy has been exposed.
    Your husband doesn’t want to offend his uncle. For the time being keep them in separate rooms until his parent decides to take him out.

  12. Hmmm
    Stella is totally right on this oh. The boy is older than your all your daughters he might start to bully them into it and will look for an easy prey amongst them.
    You need to protect your kids.
    For now they should be locked up in separate rooms by that your maid once they have had lunch, they should take the time to have siester after lunch.
    That way your daughters will get undeestand they are not meant to play with the opposite sex until they have more sense and can protect themselves.
    Better still look for a way to bring an end to that boy staying in your house after school hours

  13. Kids molest other kids too.

    A lot of times, kids don't say anything because they were only told "if a GROWNUP touches you".. so they don't realize it's wrong all round.

    That boy has been touched and children who are touched are more likely to touch others. The fact that his parents are excusing his behavior is an indicator that something else is going on behind the scenes that they are not aware of.

    You are not overreacting at all. It's not kid's stuff.
    You and your husband must protect your girls by canceling that 'after school' respectfully.

    1. Exactly, cancel the after school stay. The boy is a social risk to your daughters, I won't even agree to that in the first place.

    2. Madam you too can help the boy, what if he is your son
      Make your daughters stay far but start sex educating him
      Who knows he might confide in you

  14. I don't know what kids of these days are turning to. This boy's action is similar to that of my mum's cousin's son and he started way younger. The thing is that their parents always seem or pretend not to understand the gravity of those actions.

    He was reported to his mum on many occasions but she always shoved it as kids stuff and that they really don't understand what they are doing.
    Madam poster please protect your daughters cos your husband is only trying to avoid a bad blood between him and his uncle forgetting what might happen on the long run. Also make sure your so called girl isn't abusing the young boy cos the boy is still a kid to learn all that.

    Another angle also; if the boy was yours, how will you handle this issue?

    1. Your last question is stupid. How will she handle another person's child that the mother is still alive and living in denial?

    2. Very good question. How can the boy be helped? It's really sad what the world is turning into

    3. VERY STUPID COMMENT, "Also make sure your so called girl isn't abusing the young boy cos the boy is still a kid to learn all that.

      Another angle also; if the boy was yours, how will you handle this issue?"

    Please stop that possessed child from coming to your house!!!
    He's possessed with a fornicating demon and until he passes it to your daughters he won't rest!!! Is it when you see or get complaints that your daughters are harassing other kids sexually that you will give yourself brain abi???
    That child is possessed and seeing your pure daughters he won't rest till he corrupts them.
    Better start teaching your daughters the word of God. And start praying for them. Because the reaction of your daughters show that the day he will have undisturbed access to them he can even corrupt two at a go!!! Chineke nna, you should be more than worried!!!
    Please don't open your door to that child again!!!
    You are their mother for a reason. Your hubby will not be serious now but wait let anything happen to his princesses that time even you will not be spared!!!

    1. 15:42 you have my type of personality. BLUNT AND DIRECT! No window-dressing

      If it's me, I will that boy's mom to her face TO STOP BRINGING HER CHILD OVER TO MY HOUSE. Simple!

  16. I can't believe you are asking this question. Don't let that boy come to your house again and let the mum know her son has been abused and she needs to talk to him in order to find out who introduced him to sex. You will be surprised that it might be a classmate who has also been exposed. The thing is children who have been abused tend to abuse other kids. She should sha find the root of the abuse and treat it from the.
    Meanwhile your daughter has already been abused by him ( fondling with her genitals is abuse). So you also have work to do on your daughter to prevent her from wanting to explore some more.

  17. Madam, I am a man and a father. You did not overreact at all. But use all your woman and human sense to stop the boy from coming to your house. He may not assault your daughters, but he may over trigger their curiosity too early, and that is as dangerous as assaulting your daughters.

    Again, use sense to handle the matter.

    You are a good mother.

  18. I hate the amount of excuses that is made for boy children. That child has been sexualized, obviously through no fault of his own, but that does not mean your daughters should pay the price for his loss of innocence. He may have seen his parents at it or come upon pornography in his home but he knows a whole more than he is letting on. There should be strict separation of the children, I would prefer him not being there whatsoever, but if he must do after-school at your home then let it happen in completely separate areas with no interaction between him and your daughters that is not supervised. Adults love to drop their guard to "get things done", but nobody should drop their guard when he is around. Also be mindful of your children if you have to visit the uncle's home. They will tell you to let the children go play so the adults can gist, do not even think about it. If you do not see how you can avoid then pretend migraine or stomach ache and grab your children and go home. Don't let laziness and adult peer pressure cause you to be lax in your duty as a mother. Sexual abuse is a life long torment in life, avoiding it all together is most important.

  19. If the boy was around 4-5yrs, I would say he probably doesn't know what he was doing, but at age , he knows what he is doing. Pls do what is right by your daughters.

  20. Madam.

    God already gave you knowledge instead of you to be thankful you are taking it lightly. I pity you. That boy would never know the door to my house ever again and I will take my daughters for virginity test.

    I have experienced this first hand before. To the glory of God the bastard has not began to molest my daughter but he already defiled several other kids in the range of 3 to 7. Guess what one of the girls now is sexually active and she's about 12 now.

    Even his mother is not helping matters. Imagine him making excuses for him. The boy never even do anything. His parents will always shield him.

  21. Madam that boy will have to stop coming yo your home please, since your husband is being a chicken about it, you are going to useless to tell your uncle and his wife that their kid can't come over again.

  22. stop that boy from coming to your house if u love your girls

  23. There should have never been another incident after the first one. Your husband is setting you up to be the bad person but in this case, gladly be the bad person. The boy should be banned from your house unless it is a family gathering. If you allow him continue to stay, he will gradually corrupt your kids. You have to be very careful and the bigger ones should always look out for their little sister.

  24. Poster, if I were you I would have slapped THUNDER πŸ’₯ out of that boys eyes and tell his mom to stop bringing him over.

    He is already sexually exposed. Maybe his parents make out in his presence. My friend complained that her brother and his wife make love while their children are on the same bed with them. This couple live in a very big mansion yet they do this rubbish. πŸ™„πŸ˜€

  25. I was in JSs1 at 9. I knew wrong from right. I knew what sex was too.
    If you don't want to protect your children, so as to preserve this relationship, that's fine. BUT CAN YOU LIVE WITH THE CONSEQUENCES?

    tell her you have enrolled your Children in after-school music or dance classes and your help is now running a training programme, so there will be no one to receive her son after school. It doesn't matter that she thinks you're lying, at least, you would have sent a subtle but clear message that you don't want her son around your girls unsupervised by YOU.

  26. I wonder why mothers especially indulge the ‘boy’ child. I had to call off a relationship because of this. A single mum of four having her bath with her son, I raised objections, she said he doesn’t know anything, one day he was throwing tantrums and started hitting his mum, I raised objections, she said it’s nothing that he is only venting, most nights, he will be calling the mum for one thing or the other while we were about to sleep, she will be going to his room to accede to his requests, at times eight times in one night, I asked her, if this boy is your boyfriend, how will your life be, she said he is only a boy, he will change later, I was like, I can’t deal, I’ve had enough

  27. My heart breaks for your daughter. Using leg to touch her privates at 5? And you are disappointed with her at 5? She’s just a baby for the love of God!!!
    You people are allowing your child to be exposed to sex too early and your husband is okaying it because of family.
    So it’s okay for your daughter to be damaged because of extended family?
    I’m disappointed in you and your husband, honestly.
    Better hope that irreparable damage hasn’t been done to your baby’s mind

  28. This is the problem with so many women esp in naija. U wanna sacrifice your happiness and well being to please others. You even do it in relationships. And u r codedly teaching that mindset to your daughter by allowing this. She will grow to hate you! I hope u are ready for that since other peoples opinion is what is more important to you than your daughter's safety. If they report u to your husband, u sef tell ur husband why u banned the boy from coming. The end

  29. If I am the poster, the type of beating I will give that boy, even wild horses cannot drag him near my Estate gate much less my street or house. NONSENSE! 😠

    1. As in... Combo ....
      By the time Im done , the boy will tell his parents he never wants to step foot into my house

  30. Madam pls I want to let u know that u did not over react,let me tell u, the ant u did not kill today will turn into a giant tommorrow. I doubt if that boy will change, he is probably possessed or rather psychologically damaged. When I was small, I was 10yrs of age, a cousin of mine he was 8yrs but very big for his age, he kept trying to molest me, he will pounce on me suddenly and push me to the bed, I will shout and fight him off,one day he wayleighed me and push me into their room I tried fighting him off, he got infuriated and threatened to stab me, if I refused. This happened when we all converged to the village for my grandpa burial.i tried to tell my parents but they called it bluff, I became overtly sensitive of his presence, I was always afraid of him,till we left. years later,we were all grown, I was 24 and he is 22 we went for another burial and I was dreading his presence.he showed up, and guess what I noticed that dirty incest desire is still in him, chasing me around and frowning if a man is talking to me,I saw his dick hardening and him stealing lustful glances at me. I was so afraid but I made sure I stayed close to my brothers and sisters before we came back. When I got back to my base, I kept seeing him in my dreams trying to rape me, I prayed so hard and got my sanity back, cos I was traumatised, the mere thought of having him touch me make me puke. This your hubby's cousin might not change it's better u fight now and become bad in there eyes so that ur daughter will not be destroyed. Iam still afraid of that idiot till date, because I can't wipe the picture of that knife incident off my memory

    1. Oh my God. What kind of a child is that one. Threatening at 8 years old. Thank God he wasnt able to have his way but he has still damaged you. YOur parents were too lax. We need to always listen to our children

    2. Oh my God. What kind of a child is that one. Threatening at 8 years old. Thank God he wasnt able to have his way but he has still damaged you. YOur parents were too lax. We need to always listen to our children

  31. You and your husband have failed as parents and will face the wrath of God if you keep allowing the boy and his mother in your home.

  32. Poster, protect your children. Damn the consequences!

  33. This is not the time to be diplomatic, protect your children. You see all these stories of 'damaged' adults we read about everyday, this is how it usually starts. You no dei do 'after school' again simple. The worst set of people to try to convince are people who are in denial. These days, 9 year old kids are in secondary school, this boy sure knows what he is doing. He will keep doing this (not just towards your daughters) until he gets help. Most likely a victim of abuse himself. In a nut shell, there is Covid biko, no after school.

  34. Poster, you acted right. Don't mind your husband and his judgement, he was just trying to avoid troubles with the uncle. You are supposed to take action not minding anyones opinion but since you allowed your husband take the decision, you can still try it out and see how it goes but still find some other means to communicate to the boy parents of your displeasure in leaving the young kids together. If possible tell his parents to keep him apart from your kids because they are all still too young.

  35. You need to protect your girls no matter what your husband says. That boy will abuse your girl one-day and at the end na sorry the mama go talk.

    Let the boy stop coming to your house if possible, if he abuse your daughter that girl will never forgive you.

  36. People will be disappointed at girls for the slightest things but gladly make excuses for the horrible things boys do. A mother like that boy’s mother won’t mind covering up his crimes forever but will be looking at whose daughter is a virgin and whose daughter wears short clothes. Perhaps the woman’s husband is like that so she’s not surprised. Keep all male relatives FAR away. If anything happens to your daughters the poor girls will be blamed. Also when your daughter is being molested why show disappointment in her?? You can’t stand up to a little boy of 9 but you expected your toddler to do what you couldn’t. Please parents change your orientation towards female children or wards and set higher standards for the men in your lives

    1. I’m just so weak at her saying she’s disappointed in her child!!! 5 years old?! What does she know? How can she do the right thing when you and your husband don’t have the balls to do the right thing??

      I’m very pissed at that statement.

  37. Person wey u go beat like thief...make dem come ask am wetin him do. Na him go dey cry anytime dem wan carry am come your house. Mtcheeww. I feel like slapping you the mama sef. Rubbish. I never marry or born but if u see as this your story dey pepper me for body ehn.

  38. My 5yrs old nephew was being molested by the nanny in her twenties. There was a family reunion in the east last december. His family came down, my other relative also came down with her 5 yr old daughter. Because of how busy everywhere was, nobody really paid attention. We were all happy the nanny helping with caring for the kids around.
    The maid would molest the boy, then tell him to sleep with his cousin.
    The maid would volunteer to bath the kids, using that avenue to molest.
    They were not the only kids in the family compound but, she singled them out.
    How she was found out is a story for another day.
    @the bv that said the boy should come accompanied.
    Because of cctv, the maid would do the molesting in toilet, kitchen, spots away from the camera.
    I know its difficult, but I think parents should look at taking care of kids themselves. When I lived in naija, I didnt think it was possible to live without nannies.

  39. I know someone who became a father at age 11. Poster be careful and stand your ground. You owe it to your daughter.

  40. Dear poster, protect your girls with the last drop of your blood so that they dont become damaged. Tell your husband to stop that boy from ever stepping foot in your home. That boy has a mother too, so let him stay there while your husband foots the bill.Teach your girls self defense. Marriage is not by force o, personally i am ready to leave my marriage to protect my children and i am ready to kill anyone who abuses my child sexually. I am that extreme.

  41. MADAm!!!!PLEASE GET THAT BOY OUT OF YOIR HOUSE NEVER let him stay with your daughters .Children molest children!!! Dont be disappointed with your daughter sometimes children are manipulated into shutting up or they might think you would blame them.The boy should go to an after school.5 years old know what sex is please dont take this 2 occasions for granted.HE MIGHT penetrate the next time and you would blame yourself for life!!! PROTECT YOUR CHILD BEFORE ANYONES FEELINGS.At four years old something similar happened to me when we went to visit our neighbours.Pls pls dont let that boy again in at 12yo again I was almost raped by a trusted uncle who was also a teenager...Please encourage your child to speak up more.I am so disappointed with you and your husband...

  42. Boy child are more sexually abused than girl child,that was how my boyfriend told me he started having sex at the age of 11 yrs.and I am wondering which woman would have sex with an 11 yrs old boy.parents should also watch their son's closely the way they watch their daughter, girl child are not the only one that need to be protected,the boys also need to be protected


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