Stella Dimoko Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative...


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Tuesday, March 02, 2021

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative...



Good day Stella and BVs...

I really need advice on this asap because i am broken, i have a boyfriend with a heart of gold he treats me with so much love to the extent my friends kept asking to know what am doing so right in my relationship that makes this guy crazy about me, its more like his love for me grows stronger with the passing of each day and i love him too...

We started dating even before i gained admission and i just graduated few months back and he has been giving hint on marriage and all...

He's always all about meeting my family for many years now but i have always asked him to wait, part of the issue at hand right now is when he graduated years back his mom wanted all her children to stay in a particular state, his siblings agreed and are all based there now but my boyfriend refused saying he wants to be close to me.

Though he didn't tell his mom its because of a girl he chose to stay here, somehow his mom found out its because of me, to be honest i was so scared because she might start feeling I am controlling and asking her son to go against her wish...

So 2months ago my boyfriend asked me to go with him to see his parents and i refused because i was still scared she would hate me for being the girl that made her son go against her wish, plus my looks, i am very fair and really beautiful i felt she might see me as one of those slay queens and might think i am with her son for the money.

But my boyfriend was almost in tears when i refused going till i changed my mind, we went to see the mother at a family function, she hugged me even at first sight before she left and my boyfriend said he would take me to his family house days later so we can all relate well

But he was just so busy that period we couldn't go plus making plans on getting me a shop because i am business minded, he then asked me to go to the site he is building a house for his mom and i did wearing a ripped/distressed jean i never knew she would be there that day, i was so scared and shy and then the next week i went to see him his mom was there and it seemed they were having a conversation so i moved to the other end to sit..

Honestly i do not know if she feels am running away from her because my boyfriend's aunt called him and said she wanted to see him and his girlfriend so i went with him.....

The aunt's hubby is actually a pastor and the man made certain prophecy about me being a very good person but there are people that saw I would be great and are trying to stop me plus i have a spirit husband, to say I was beyond confused and down was an understatement, the man and his wife were super nice to me and even asked me to come back for a deliverance session and be prayerful..

Now my boyfriend says his aunt told him I have manners unlike what my boyfriend's mom told her, so this means my bf's mom thinks am manner less and i don't know why...

My boyfriend just kept hugging me saying we are going to fight this spirit husband together and those attacking me because he can't imagine life without me, he even says he would come see my mom even though i disagreed...

I have been crying non-stop because i am a shy, sweet and respectful young lady with manners so i don't know why his mom thinks I am manner less probably because I am always scared around her or hiding i don't know, the few times we met i always greeted her even though its always from a distance because i was just shy meeting for the first period

My boyfriend says its all his fault, he could have taken me to his family house where both his dad and mom can sit with me and get to know me better instead of the random places the mom has seen me twice or so..

I am just so scared even though my boyfriend says he's going to fix everything, i don't know what he is planning to do, i just know i don't want to lose him because i love him a lot

I haven't smiled for days, even the things that could make a girl smile like getting different hair, wardrobe change and all he's done all these few days i still can't smile

I'm so scared i plan on going for the whole deliverance but the aspect of the mom saying am manner less ,i don't know how to change her perspective of me being such girl

Please i need advice on what to do, the idea of leaving him pierces my heart, I told him i just wanted to die out of confusion and he said if am getting poison I should get for us both because i am not supposed to be worried about his mom, because she does not hate me and he keeps saying he would fix things

But please what can i do to help fix this, I am confused.

*Please fix this your lack of self confidence because this is just the beginning.....
I am wondering why you didn't walk up to the mother of your boyfriend to greet her properly but decided to do so far afar with that flimsy excuse you gave up there....if you were in her shoes, what would you do?

It is not your boyfriend that will fix the small mess, it is you...
Visit her and let her see you for who you are.....
You have visited his aunt, now visit his parents and stop acting up like a small girl without sense..... Your man looks like he is into his family a lot so you need to rebrand yourself and be more receptive....


  1. Be self confident. You said she hugged and greeted you well the first time. The second time, instead of going to sit afar, you should have walked up to her and greeted her well. The ultimate here is stop being shy and beating your confidence down

    1. Please, her fiancΓ©'s mom is rather HARSH in her judgement. Stella, you are HARSH too! 🀦‍♀️🀦‍♀️
      She's a mother and should be invite the girl to her home or tell her son to bring her home.

      Two or three casual meetings in busy places/building site are not enough to assess someone's character.
      Besides, her boyfriend should tell his mom his girl is shy.

      Some people are shy around people that are not close family and friends. Everyone cannot be super confident like Stella and me.

      Please, that prophecy about spiritual husband is out of order!!! πŸ™„πŸ™„πŸ™„
      It's only Nigerians that have these spiritual husbands and wives. Are they assigned to them by these prophets and pastors?

      She didn't have spiritual husband from year one to graduation while their son/nephew was dating and providing for her.
      Now as he mentioned marriage, spiritual husband 'crept out from under the rock'! 😏

    2. She's a mother and should * invite the girl to her home... (pardon the typo)

    3. Didn’t you read where the guy invited her to his home and she refused.

    4. I pls if you have no knowledge of anything just don't born again and have lived abroad. Even Oyibode do deliverances. The prevalence of certain things depends on territorial spirits. Africans did a lot of idol worship and there were a lot of convenants that demanded families servicing idols. As more people stop servicing these demonic alters they have repacurtions that need to be broken by the new covenant with Christ. For white people a lot of them delve in to satanic and demonic convenants with certain lifestyles. They also have demonic oppressions and if you go to some bible believing churches the need arises for such deliverances. In this case it might be true or not but any true believer will know these things happen. Poster get to know this woman and stop being afraid of how she perceives you. Build your self confidence.

    5. Ada Bekee, I did but her boyfriend ended up taking her to a family function to meet his mom instead of home.

      There was this girl my brother MISSED getting married even after my mom advised him to marry her.

      Why did my ONLY brother leave this girl? Her elder half-sister who match-made her and my brother got jealous after they all attended our family function. Right at that occasion she told my brother the girl dated one married man before. (Babe is light-skinned too, like this poster)

      My mom found out when she saw the girl crying, kneeling and begging my brother.
      Mom told him to forgive her since it was in her past and she was young, obviously naive.
      After the family event, mom still called my brother and advised him to marry this girl because that her elder half-sister could have been jealous that her younger sister stands to inherit and enjoy a lot with my only brother.

      That my brother's fiancΓ©e got married to someone else even before my brother got married. Her husband sponsored her through University and she has 4 children. She was my second elder sister's schoolmate and you would think they were sisters.

      Guess what, my brother and his wife are yet to have children in 15 years due to fibroid.
      We love his wife and are still praying for them.

      Mothers-in law, please be more receptive and patient with your sons' fiancΓ©es. πŸ’ž

    6. 19.03 so the religion and worshipping Africans did b4 the importation of Christianity/Islam were demonic? All your ancestors worshipped demons because they weren't Christians?

      Just questions o.

    7. Anonymous 15:38
      Even in the abroad there's spiritual attachments. More even in the white communities. The only difference is that they are not as religiously lazy as we are.

      Bia dear poster, may God unseat whoever is sitting at the edge of your self-confidence. Try and be bold and assert yourself with a positive mindset when meeting new people. Self doubt is out of the question. So be your normal self around anyone. Don't try pretending to be who you are not, in other to please others. Who will like you will like you. And who will accept you the exact way you are, will accept you. Don't ever be who you are not in any relationship you find yourself, because it boomerangs.

      MIL and FIL, like astute and confident in-laws. At this level you are with your boyfriend, find the time to go and acquaint yourself with his family. After all, he wanted that for you. You might get to know a few new things about your potential hubby.

    8. Why are you stopping your boyfriend from going to see your parents is what I don't understand.

    9. I got three things from your writeup, you lack self-confidence, you’re very naive and unintelligent. How old are you?

  2. Replies
    1. "That which I feared the most has come upon me"...

      You feared the idea of mother in law so bad that you eventually attracted a bad impression on yourself. It's not too late. Relax.

      Next time you are visiting, prepare your mind with enthusiasm/excitement/delight. Go there loving her truely not just expecting her to love and accept you. Your clothes or quietness is not the issue, it's your mind-set and body language.

      Now, as a solution I will advice you take time and think about all the good things you can remember about her, the kind of friendly mother-daughter relationship you hope to enjoy with her. If you like you can buy her a gift and pay her sincere compliments when next you see her. Asides a positive mid you don't need any other thing to get people/her to like you.

      As per those talking deliverance and spirit husband...there is no such thing, my dear. I am not in the mood to argue with anyone but it's the truth I've just told you. You are in charge of your life and destiny. No man or spirit can limit you below the limitations you have put on yourself.

      Cheer up and enjoy your man.

    2. Meanwhile, you discribed yourself as very fair and beautiful. A lot of people believe fair beauties can't be ordinary and must have spirit husband as if God is incapable of making such beautiful and perfect thing. I am now used to it cos I am fair myself and I now know better.

      Good luck.

    3. I don't know if I should cry or laugh
      Have you discussed with your own family?
      What is all this rubber, they will join see someone and say the person has spirit husband.

      I used to be shy around my mother inlaw when we were dating
      She thought I was stuck up, but later realised I was shy.
      Maybe he should be the one to tell them.

      Has your own family seen an assessed him?

      Wo, I don't know for you o, if you want to go for deliverance two of you should do it together. what if the daddy water is inside him now 🀣🀣

  3. And what's with that rubbish prophecy about a spirit husband. Yeye dey smell.

  4. Wow! Simply go to his family house and get really acquainted with them most especially his mum because it seems all that's lacking for now

  5. I stopped at the spirit husband shit. If you're a single girl and meets a pastor for prayer, 90% of the time they'll tell you you have a spirit husband. Why? It's really annoying...almost all the girls in this country has spirit husband abi?

    1. 15:10 you just echoed my thoughts as expressed up there ( at 15:38).

      Spirit husbands and spirit wives, only in Nigeria for Nigerians by Nigerian pastors. Very annoying.🀦‍♀️🀦‍♀️🀦‍♀️

    2. That is a lie stop tripping...a lot of idol worship happens in Africa so that is expected

  6. Annoying girl. You're just worrying over nothing

  7. Poster if you were dark skinned, they'd never say you have a spiritual husband. Don't let them mess with your head. When next you visit his family, greet them properly but be yourself and don't pretend.

    1. Which one concern skin color and spiritual husband. Don't dark skin ladies get possessed too? Nigerian colonial mentality sha

  8. Amarachi With C2 March 2021 at 15:12

    Girl! His Mom is nice from your explanation so far. Try and see her, chat and even stay for a weekend. Please, do your part cause guys are always attached to their Mom.
    Word of advice, don't stay far from her next time. She will be in life for a long time, and the best is to establish a good relationship with her. I don't have mother in-law, and it is paining me like hell. Try and have a mother,and daughter relationship with her. You will definitely enjoy it.

    1. You don't know what God did for you.

    2. LMAO. Ah, Anon πŸ’€πŸ’€

    3. Anon 15:39, let's hope GOD will do same for your future daughter in law.

    4. Amarachi With C2 March 2021 at 18:15

      Anon 15:39, l heard she was harsh but would have wanted my type of person, as l am just like her. My Mum is alive, ilshe is everything a wife will pray for, and l want to be in my kid's life tomorrow.

    5. 15.39 that same God will do it for your future daughter inlaw.

  9. You see that spirit husband they are telling you? Please don't mind them, if you had a spirit husband, no one will need to tell you, every fair lady has a spirit husband Mshewwwww

    How can you be greeting your gf mum from afar, like waving? Chio, I'm very shy oh, but I drop the shyness when I need to and put up that brave and confidence face when I need to

    Make sure your bf takes you home, spend sometimes with her, once might not be enough but soon she will see how great you're. Worry no more okay. Wish you the best

  10. Sis, you are self sabotaging. You literally created the person your intended mother inlaw is seeing albeit unintentionally yet you are crying wolf.

    No spirit is attacking you and please, stop being such a whiny and needy girl. Nothing has gone bad, you just need to show this woman the sweet humble side that you have been withholding because of fear. You said the first time y'all met that she was pleasant and even hugged you..that right there shows that this woman is open to get to know you. Give her a chance to know you..the real you.

  11. It's probably the way you and his mum met that made her think of you that way. I don't even get why you are hiding and greeting your mother-in-law to be from a distance. Hi and visit her and let her see you for who you are. All this hiding and whining behind won't change her perception about you.

  12. There's nothing wrong in being frightful or scared of your intending mother in law. It's a natural feeling. Majority were and some guys were too meeting their intending father's in law. It all depends. All those that act all confident on the surface before their in-laws were one time or the other scared like you are now. It's no big deal. Any day you're to meet her, get strength from the things that give you confidence, be shy for all you can and keep a smiley face. She will understand. Just like job seekers appearing before interviewers. One day you will be a mother in-law to some one and your understanding of the way the girl fidgets before you will be real.

    Go see her when next your guy brings it up. She wont kill you. Smile and keep smiling before her.

    Good luck.

  13. Stella I love you for this advice you gave this girl.
    Chop kisses and hugs Joor.
    Back to you poster, are you a learner, better be wise.
    You are acting like a secondary school girl. Better be up and doing. You see all Stella wrote up there with her red pen? Follow it step by step, for crying out loud you are a full ADULT, stop acting like an underage. This isn't hide and seek anymore, be bold and show your great side to that mother inlaw to be.
    Even if she ends up not liking you, as long as she is not the type that goes diabolical you will definitely be fine marrying her son.
    Poster I think I like you anyway, you sound naive, loving and sweet. Anyway I wish you all the best, and as Stella will always say don't forget to give us a feedback note after you have fixed this lil mess and invite us to your wedding.
    If I live in your city I will attend.
    All the best!

  14. You are you own problem not his mum.
    Fix yourself.

  15. Abeg park go one side jare let’s deal with those who have real chronicles!

    1. Hahahaha 🀣🀣🀣 e be like say I should wozzzz her face. The girl (and yes girl not a grown woman) act so immature and childish. The mother inlaw is a woman like you naw for goodness sake. Na wa ooo. Unless you’re hiding something. And NO you don’t have a spirit husband. Just marry your b00 jejely and live your life!

  16. As for spiritual husband, don't mind that his pastor uncle, you don't have any spiritual husband.
    Once all this religious people see fair ladies, they assume she has spiritual husband.

    You should have ask him the name of the person he saw that wants to block your destiny.

    1. Lol @"ask him the name of the person he saw that wants to block your destiny."🀣🀣🀣🀣

      Ezigbote "ask him the name"! πŸ˜…πŸ˜…πŸ˜…

      Poster, please also ask him the name of that spiritual husband, where he lives in the spirit realm and who he paid your dowry to so they could return it! 🀣

      Akiko! (Story!)

  17. 1. Don't go for any deliverance. You don't know the man spiritually, why will he deliver you? He told you you have a spirit husband and you swallowed it hook, line and sinker. Be careful. First find out if you really do. Buy a book written by Dr. Olukoya (mfm) on spirit spouse. Read it and confirm if you really do have spirit spouse. Don't let people transfer demons into you.

    2. Let your man speak for you concerning being mannerless. You have no business trying to convince your in-laws to be about who you really are. If you do, your entire marital life will be laced with confrontations between you and them. In marriage, your husband should handle his people. That way, they'd respect you.

    3. Did you really pass through the higher institution? Your lack of confidence is extreme. It is either you are still very young or you have innate fear of marriage. Either ways, you better work seriously on it if not, your in-laws will take undue advantage of you and intimidate you.

    God help you.

    1. You advised her to disregard what the pastor told her because she doesn't know him spiritually, and in the same breath, you advised her to get a book by Dr Olukoya of MFM to ascertain if she really has a spirit husband. I bet she doesn't know who Dr Olukoya is, so why should she believe whatever it is he wrote about spiritual husbands?

    2. @anon 16:02, I asker her to read the book to know what it means to have a spirit spouse and the signs. I didn't ask her to go to Olukoya for deliverance. Matter of fact, deliverance can be done by yourself in the comfort of your home with the word of God and with prayer points specifically written for the aspect of life that needs deliverance. Thank you.

    3. Gbam! Chop kiss Jechix πŸ˜˜πŸ’‹

  18. The only thing I can tell you is to disregard that spiritual nonsense prophecy. Once they see a beautiful lady that is very fair,they will say she has spirit husband. I have been told that several times.Dont mind that rubbish talk,and tell your fiancee not to mind that kind of talk.

  19. Poster Stella as said it all..Please build your self confidence..As stated, this guy loves you so much and don't let him down before his parents and relatives...You have no spirit husband, it is one thing to be told and another to acknowledge you have a spirit husband...You have to be emotionally and spiritually matured in this journey called marriage...If you know his parents are conservatives, please wear modest clothings....Go online and read self- help books about how to build your self confidence..All the best..

  20. Don't go to the family house alone.
    Go with him once or twice before you go on your own.the mom just wants a close relationship,Las Las you will be fine.

    1. She doesn’t need to be close to the mother inlaw abeg. These in-laws can be so controlling and would want to control her marriage . She should just love them from afar. No need for any yeye closeness πŸ™„

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  22. You are the problem here, ask your boyfriend to take you to their house, infact find your way to his house and meet his mom,just tell her you came to greet her and see what will happen

  23. I was just like you when my husband was coming to marry me, very timid somebody.
    I’m beautiful and very eloquent but I always felt I belonged to the sideline.

    My in-laws might have had their reservations about my attitude but nothing was said to my hearing and it continued till after my wedding.

    It was after putting to bed I got my confidence, I realized I needed to stand up not just for myself but also for my child, if I continue being the “mumu wey no Dey talk” people will walk all over me and mine.
    I talk now and I am very vocal, some say I have been hiding my character since, I don’t care.
    You need to break out of your shell, being timid does not help anybody.
    If you are in a room, always say to yourself that nobody can beat me for airing my opinion. Good luck.

  24. That his aunt's husband maybe eyeing you and using spiritual husband to get close..Take a week off and get to know your to be husband's family..First impression matters and you didn't create a good one.. never mind,shell s understand you with time..chai..Your love is sweet while I'm still waiting for this kind of love..

  25. One thing I know is do not go for any deliverance o.

    Your boyfriend seems to be really into you. I think you are letting anxiety take over completely. I get it tho. Try and just relax. Take deep breaths. Focus on you and your boyfriend. When you meet his mother again, act like you meeting her again for the first time. Just relax. I will say it again. Just relax.

  26. You are not a serious person at all! All that happened was your own doing. Stella thank you cos you gave her the perfect advice! You better wake up! How can your guy want to take you to see his parents and you refuse to go what manner of stupid shyness is that. To the extend he has to keep begging you. And then you see your mother in law to be and greet her from afar cos you are shy pls how old are you? You sounding so immature like you didn’t even pass through school better find time and go and see the mother in-law in the house and do your best to change the impression she has of you. You’re so lucky your guy is so in love and into you else another person will have left you and think you’re very unserious

  27. Why are you stopping him from coming to see your family? It's like you're not ready.

    Stop being shy around his family cos they'll be in your life for a long time if you really want this guy. Babe, be bold and sharp but gentle. Go and visit his mum and be nice, that's all!

    As for the deliverance talk, you'd better stay in your house and don't let one stranger lay a hand on you...

    1. Cynthi don vex!!! I just dey look the chronicle since.
      You have a man who obviously is in love with you and wants to settle down and you are dulling.

      Nna mehn, dear poster be sharp oooo and just know that if you marry this guy his mom will always be in his life. How long do you want to hide?

  28. Dear poster, you are the one confusing yourself with complex issues.

    Common! You already brought down yourself before even getting to know your boyfriend's mum.

    Hey girl! Keep your head high, have some confidence and stop thinking low of yourself.

    And stop pretending just to please anyone; you wear ripped jeans but can't wear it to where your bf mum is? Because? Her children doesn't wear ripped jeans?

    You are giving yourself unnecessary headache.

    You don't have any spiritual hubby.

  29. My dear you are over thinking and it's affecting your confidence. Please be yourself and act like the sweet person your boyfriend knows when next you are around his family. You can even start and hold a conversation with the mom when next you meet her, so she can know you better instead of running away from her. Don't be surprised she is also anxious to know more about the girl who makes her son's world complete. So give her the chance.

  30. Stella has said it all. Kindly ignore that spirit husband and enemy line. Best of luck

  31. Nne
    Baby girl
    Point of correction, you don’t have a spirit husband and I say it and reject it on your behalf. This issue of spirit husband has really beclouded the minds of many.
    2 Be yourself be courageous don’t allow this issue to weigh you down and try as much as you can to fix up whatever you think that has made her your mother in-law to be to say so without first hearing that from her own mouth
    3- What are they delivering you from? Are you possessed?
    Baby girl you got a loving darling that’s ready to walk with you in all things so be strong okay and stop been confused as you said Cose in all this you stated I see nothing absolutely wrong with you.
    Much love
    Bv: Daddy Big Stuff

  32. Babe, build your confidence....

  33. Mothers and fathers please build your children’s self esteem and nurture them with love. Give them moment to also express their minds during arguments. See a grown woman who has such a low self worth/self confidence about herself. She can’t even face another woman just like her. It’s really sad and just too common in this our community. Let’s raise confident boys and girls so they can face the world with their chest high.

  34. Poster, u are the problem here oo,u are bothered over a problem that is not there, but u crested in your mind, go n see ur mum in-law to be , spend sometime with her n make her see ur true nature.

  35. dear poster, why do you keep saying NO each time he wants to come and see your parents, are you also shy around your parents? i sincerely dont get what your problem is, try and relate with your future mother in-law as though she was your own mum. bring in conversations like, hope youre good ma, you look so beautiful, thank you for raising an awesome man. and please get her a gift when next you visit.


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