Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Saturday Laughs

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Saturday, March 13, 2021

Saturday Laughs

  






















42 comments:

  1. These memes are funny πŸ€£πŸ˜…πŸ€£πŸ˜…πŸ€£

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  2. Kai...... Laugh no gree me... Cos I know get money my junior see me, e no greet me

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  3. Hahaha what kind of pawpaw inspired memes are these?

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  4. Choi🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣 pawpaw is legendary mbok! because you no fine,you toast me I no gree you come dey vexπŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£

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    1. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

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  5. Note! Not my work oo, saw somewhere and it cracked me up real bad and i decided o share....


    I have been house hunting for a while now.
    My plan was to get at least a one bedroom self contain, but the price was too high, the least I got was 150k (agreement/commission inclusive). And I have just 60k, my friend decided to introduce me to one caretaker and the man told me there is a house of 1500 per month and with agreement and commission it would cost me 50k to start but that it is a face me I face you.

    He also assured me that it is a good place and infact a steal, he said the landlord made it so cheap because he's a man of God. Na so my joy increased and without further ado I told him to let us go check the place out.

    We arranged to go there in the afternoon but it was delayed and we later got there round 6pm
    On getting there I realized that it is a gated compound which is a plus for me, but when we got there the caretaker refused to enter even though the gate was unlocked, he started calling one of the tenant to pls come and open the gate
    I asked him why and he said there is a Dog in the compound and nobody dares enter carelessly, he said even the landlord had slept outside the gate many times because of the Dog.

    I was shocked and I find it both hilarious and stupid, a whole landlord that could not enter his own compound because of tenant's dog. While we were still talking the Dog owner came out, called the dog chained it and then ask us to come in.

    When we entered my heart jumped cos i saw a big lion I started screaming lion!!!! Lion !!! Lion!!!..
    The caretaker told me to relax and said it's not a lion but a Dog, when I heard Dog my jaw dropped, na Dog big like this, I'm 5.7ft tall and this Dog is almost my height and very robust ,na there I understand why the landlord sleep outside.

    I told the Dog owner who introduced himself to me as brother Charles that this animal should be in a zoo but he just laughed and told me I will understand the reasons why the Dog is there later.

    We proceeded into the house, which is a one storey building, there is a borehole in the compound which means water is not a problem.
    On getting to the room I was to rent, immediately we opened the Door, Me and the caretaker was almost ambushed by cats, big big cats, about four of them, when they saw us they rushed towards us in an attempt to flee and for the second time in few minutes my heart jumped again.

    My shock was reshocked when the caretaker told me that once I fix the Door net the rats won't be able to enter, I thought he made a mistake so I told him "you mean Cat" he said no that those animals are rats.

    Omo I gave up, I didn't know when I screamed ahhhhhhhhh, but why all the animals for this compound con big pass normal size now I asked him..he assured me that it's nothing and it is only big because I'm seeing it for the first time and by the time I get used to them it won't be special anymore..

    I just lost I wanted to give up on the house but the room was actually big and clean, and the ceiling was p.o.p the man was right when he said it is a steal..

    The caretaker told me to check it out myself why he quickly goes out to recieve a call..
    Na there I con dey wonder, Dog be like Lion. Rat be like Cat.

    Wetin mosquito go con be like ?..
    While I was still wondering I heard soft female voice greeting me.

    Typing ...

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    1. Pls come and complete this gist 😳😳

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    2. Madame koinkoin A.K.A "PeaceMaker "13 March 2021 at 13:09

      Bia bia bia please come and finish this hot joke o, continue typing from down below biko!

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    3. immediately I turned right to see who was greeting me . Lo and behold I saw the most beautiful creature ever , the babe must be in her early twenties , not fair not dark but glowing , she's got curves , dimples and was blessed both front and back ,

      How I was able to see all these in just 2 seconds is another topic entirely , I greeted her back and introduced myself as the new tenant ( seeing the babe automatically made me certain Its a good house after all).

      I told her my name and she replied with her name adding that she's the landlord daughter ,

      I replied ooh nice to meet you , that's when I noticed her carrying some bats about 3 bats in a parker .

      I was shocked again and I asked her if bats do come to the compound ,she looked surprise and asked me where I saw bat .I pointed to her hand and she laughed and said "No these are just mosquitoes"..

      "Jesussssss " I screamed ,she smiled and told me it's nothing to worry about she also assured me that she will put me through on how to stop them from coming into my room..

      When I heard that my senses flew away , " Are you sure you would put me through" I asked again .
      She replied yeah ,she then ask if I am married and I quickly replied that I'm not married and very single ..
      She just smiled and said " Me too" ..

      Before I could say anything else the caretaker showed up ,and the girl excuse us assuring me that she will check on me later ..

      When the caretaker asked "How far u like the house ?". I replied yes yes .it's a beautiful place with beautiful animals .(up till now I still couldn't believe I said that )..

      We proceeded to the ATM,I withdrew the money ,signed agreement,paid and collected key.
      There was not much to do in the room , except for the door net ,

      I was introduced to someone that could help me fix the net ,I paid and left for my friend house ,the thought of the babe has clouded my mind and I totally forgot about the

      Dog that looked like Lion
      Rat that looked like Cat
      Mosquito that looked like bat ..


      I got home that night unknown to me that my troubles had just began





      Typing..

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    4. Just helping anonymous complete the story lol

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  6. Osita the king of memes.The last one loud o

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  7. Hahahaha I have faint

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  8. Because I no get money, you see iPhone 12 for my hand you Dey ask me who get amπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

    Because I no get money, you see me for Restaurant you Dey ask me who bring me come 😩
    O wrong nau

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    1. 🀣🀣🀣

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    2. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

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    3. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

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    4. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ€£

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  9. Because I no get money, you see me with your babe you no panic

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    1. πŸ™†πŸ™†πŸ™†πŸ™†πŸ™†πŸ™†πŸ™†

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    2. This one enterπŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ€£

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  10. Because I be carry over student, I tell you answer you Dey ask me “Are you sure?

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  11. This akin don suffer for Nigerians ✋

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  12. E be like say na the latest meme be this

    E fuuny sha 😊😊

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  13. The laugh Meme though πŸ˜‚

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  14. The first meme, the HEAT ehn. Thank God for the rain yesterday

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  15. At the 2nd Meme, who go copy OLODO before

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  16. Because I no get big breast, you hug other girls con give me handshake..πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
    Because I no tall you dey tell everybody say I be your kid sis wey you pass with 8years.πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
    Because I no get money begger waka pass me for street go beg my friend.πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
    Because I no resemble Genevieve you con dey tell people say I be your distant relation.πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
    Because

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    1. 🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣

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    2. Madame koinkoin A.K.A "PeaceMaker "13 March 2021 at 13:07

      Hahahahahahaha you try no ne small, I enjoyed it.

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  17. Heat... hahaha. The heat is on another level.

    Second to last. Haha. Who copies from an olodo rabata? Better to fail.

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  18. Because I no get money, you ask me why I dey brush my teeth since nobody go know say my mouth dey smell as I no suppose open am πŸ₯΄

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  19. Tailor no put pocket πŸ˜„πŸ˜„πŸ˜„πŸ˜„πŸ˜„πŸ˜„πŸ˜„πŸ˜„

    Hussle oh! God bless usπŸ™ŒπŸ½πŸ™ŒπŸ½πŸ™ŒπŸ½πŸ™ŒπŸ½πŸ™ŒπŸ½πŸ™ŒπŸ½

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  20. That first memo is so methis period...my uncle was ccomplaining to his wife the other day that he finds out that breeze is entering the visitor's room well,that he wants to be sleeping there now but he finds out I have beat him to it.. he was then complaining that why should I be occupying two rooms in his house...my aunty was like jebenu, oburo ngwe I tiyelu isi ebeawu Fu oluchi ebe ogba oto anaru ikuku GI na oso emee

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  21. 🀣🀣🀣Olodo rabata,oju eja lo ma je🎡🎡🎡

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  22. When I got home , I realized my friend wasn't home , I called him and he told me to meet him in a police station nearby.. police station ?? Wetin happen ?. He did not reply just hung up .

    When I got there I saw my friend with plaster and bandages all over his face and legs ,, the Dog really injured him , my friend saw me and urge me to come and write my own statement too, on the Dog matter ,


    The police told me not to fear and that What my friend is doing is the right thing, they assured me that They would saction both the landlord and the Dog owner and make them pay for my friend injuries and also give me back my house rent money if I want.


    Na so I carry Biro write epistle on what happened,,the police then called us to inform us that whatever money they pay my friend they will collect half for thier fee and we agreed ..


    I went back home that night with mixed feeling ,I know involving the police will make me lose the house and that means I won't see fareedah again, but well atleast I'll be alive .

    Next day we went to the police station again and together with 4 police men we proceeded to the house ,on gettin'there ,the police officers did not even bother to knock ,they just barged Into the compound and started shouting asking everyone to come out.


    Me and my friend checked the cage and noticed that the Dog was not there ,but we were calm because the police officers was with us .

    Out of nowhere the Dog pounced on one officer and started biting the leg ,omo see commotion,instead of the other three officers to intervene for thier colleague ,to our shock they took to thier heels ,

    You need to see race that day na my friend I pity pass because the guy was still recovering.

    The police officers started running faster than us as if they were possessed ,


    when we all finally got to a safe place ,the 3 officers turned to me and my friend and handcuffed us, we were shocked ,when we asked them why and what our offence was?.they replied that we committed four offence.
    (1) "Lying to a policeman

    ,(2) Tendering False information

    (3) manipulation

    and finally (4) attempted murder "..shoo all these big grammar for why now? We did nothing officers na " I replied,.

    They said we wrote Dog in our statement knowing fully well that it was a Lion thereby putting thier life at risk...they said if they had knew it was a Lion they would have come with better machinery ..

    But It's not a lion it's a Dog sir " ..we argued but this officers refused to listen , instead they gave me a hot slap and told me to keep quiet , " Shut up who you be, you think say we no go school to know difference between Lion and dog ? "..
    I couldn't utter any more word , they dragged us to the police station and put us behind bars


    We later found out that the policeman that was attacked had been badly injured and lost a lot of blood ..

    Before long both the Dog owner and the Landlord joined us in prison with half of the compound .

    While in the prison both the landlord and the Dog owner kept shouting at each other ,the landlord blamed the tenant for bringing such Dog while the tenant blamed the landlord for not doing anything about the high level of insecurity in the compound..

    When they finally calm down after another tenant begged both party the word that came out of my mouth was."Hope your daughter fareedah is safe sir "..





    The man replied


    Typing ......

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  23. Lol funny memes and funnier comments.
    I had a good laugh.

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  24. 🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣 hope your daughter fareedah is safe πŸ˜‚

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  25. Stella. In the name of God, I want you to tell me where your bvs come from? Who is this one?? I'm here laughing my Saturday away. Thanks whoever you are. And please keep it coming.

    Wizkid FC

    #Proudly Tiv#

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