Dr Freaks Journal - My Encounter With The "Seraphim"

 WOW.... Interesting!

...I grew up in a home that would readily discuss "drug abuse" and discourage the use of illicit drugs at every forum. Unfortunately and fortunately, I was surrounded by examples of well brought up children who indulged in drugs and "Jones(ed)"² so the subject was easy for me to masticate and digest.

However, for some strange reasons, "sex education" was a taboo in my home, but that's not the meat of today's write-up.

In my secondary school days, we wrapped paper and smoked occasionally. I gained admission into the prestigious University of Benin in my teens. I think I was the youngest in my entire Department, but I doubt if I was the most timid or gentle at the time. For the very first time in my life, my mum dropped me off in School and left me all by myself! I was free and free indeed! I was "now an adult"! Have you ever found, or did you ever find yourself in that state? Nostalgic feelings.

How did I spend my first night? You really care to know? Okay, I undertake not to edit any part of the story. And if I did? Just kidding. I headed straight for the "happening joint"³ on campus (did I just use the word -"campus"? How I hate that word) and placed my order -a bottle of "Gulder Lager Beer", my brand at the time (before I switched to Stout and later Star) and 2 sticks of cigarette (1 stick of Rothman's and 1 stick of St Moritz). I lit the 2 simultaneously and "test-smoked" and in the end, I settled for Rothman's. For some time, I indulged in the habit. I was able to sustain this, maybe because I was advised not to do marijuana and they forgot to extend the warning to cigarettes, my little "conspiracy theory", if you care to know.

I had and still have good friends. Some indulged in the use of marijuana, but permit me to hide their identities due to the sensitive nature of this post. In fairness to them, none of them ever lured me into the use of marijuana any ways. I think I was just too comfortable with my Rothman's to even notice anyone smoking marijuana around me. For stranger reasons, despite the fact that I was surrounded by good friends who indulged habitually, I sighted the substance for the very first time in my 200 Level when out of curiosity I requested to see it, without more. I hated and still hate it for the singular reason that the smell irritates me.

Then, back to the meat of this piece. 

In my 200 Level, I had gone to visit a friend I think in Ekosodin and I ran into other mutual friends numbering over 10 who were having a swell time behind their hostel. I had my pack of Rothman's at the time, as usual and at some point the urge in me grew stronger and I requested for "Indo" for the very first time in my entire life! My experience was unique. I finished an entire wrap without feeling funny. I was not "high"! And my boys were so excited. I did not go back to "Dockyard'⁴ until I think 4 months later. 

On this fateful day, I visited my friends in Hall 2, F Block and I was perceiving the smell of marijuana, so I traced the boys to the back of the hostel and behold, Boys were "slying"⁵. The devil is a liar! What actually took me to that place on that day? I think I took just 4 "puffs" and my life became transformed. There was this Warri boy who was out to test my coordination and sanity at the time. He was just repeating one useless statement over and over with a view to getting me irritated and lose my composure and everyone was waiting for that glorious moment when my enemy would "guck"⁶. 

At that point, all that my parents had told me about drug abuse flashed back and I could hear them both audibly thus: "...if you smoke marijuana, you would run mad" and behold, I started seeing celestial beings (Seraphim) praying for me to regain my sanity. You know what, marijuana and "crack" joints are the best places to find the "best constituted" and the "most competent "Executive Council" in the world. You find Special Advisers and Personal Assistants too. One of the "Ministers", I guess he was the Minister of Health or Agriculture, advised me to drink gari. One, maybe that one was the Minister of Housing, asked me to come and sleep under the fan in his room. 

Eventually, I heeded the advice of the Minister of Housing. I followed him to his room, drank gari and slept, I think for almost 4 hours. I woke up, felt better and never went back to "Dockyard" till date.

Why am I writing this epistle?

Drug abuse is real. When you send your children to school, out of curiosity, they are going to test the water(s) and try new habits and there is nothing you can do about it because you are not going to be there. That is just the hard truth! However, there is hope! From a very tender age, start imprinting in their little minds that if they consume or abuse drugs, they are going to either run mad or end up as "junkies". I'm not kidding, many bright souls have ended up as junkies and they are messed up for the rest of their lives, save for divine intervention. You don't want your beautiful children to end up as junkies. Please parents, pay maximum attention.

 The mind of a child is a fertile ground, make sure you plant the right seeds and water it with sound doctrines, morals, values and ethos.

Drug Abuse is real. Help your child. Help your nation. Discuss drugs and drug abuse in your homes. May our children not end up as junkies. May they not see Seraphim for the wrong reasons.

1. Seraph (noun)

plural noun: seraphim

an angelic being, regarded in traditional Christian angelology as belonging to the highest order of the ninefold celestial hierarchy, associated with light, ardour, and purity

2. Run mad

3. A popular lounge

4. Coded language

5. Smoking marijuana

6. Get high and misbehave