According to her
"Hey guys
There is something I must talk about today that I have noticed and I think it is becoming very wrong and annoying, who am I to judge? There is freedom of speech so I will speak.
I have noticed this trend, you sent DMS, pictures it's not even fair on the kid. Yeah I understand some people became baby mamas by choice, some not by choice , unfortunately some of us got married, my kids were produced from two marriages. I didn't go about having babies and calling myself a baby mama , No! it just happened and there's nothing I could do but I understand and encourage single mothers as much as I can.
I find it very wrong and annoying when people just go about having kids and you can't afford to take care of them, it's not right on the child, like I said who am I to judge but it's becoming very annoying like you open your dm, you see so many messages " my child has not eaten" then go and work, get on the street, hawk, I don't care but your child is priority, that child must eat. How long would you keep begging? yeah some people are unfortunate but you don't go about impregnating yourself when you are not ready to bring a child into the world then why bring a child into the world to suffer?
There are a lot of menial jobs, you might be working in a place and Dangote meets you he might elevate you. A lot of people have been elevated not by the books they read, I studied biochemistry but I am an interior designer so it's not all about what you read.
Some people are fortunate they don't even have B.SC but they are doing well so don't go about sending people dms. I understand kids are blessings but don't make them become your burden by having so much that you can't carter for. Please it must stop."
Some people are fortunate they don't even have B.SC but they are doing well so don't go about sending people dms. I understand kids are blessings but don't make them become your burden by having so much that you can't carter for. Please it must stop."
What do you think about this rant?
We are beginning to adopt begging as a culture and it's just so wrong.
ReplyDeleteYes, the poor will always be with us but at least make effort, and stop ferling entitled to other people's money.
Case in point, tou will see how people will crawl out from hibernation even on this blog over the next few days.
*feeling, you
DeleteThese Instagram beggars are something else. Especially the ones using children to beg
Deleteon point
DeleteThe one dat shocks me,u will see on American Celebrity pages....Shaderoom o, Beyonce Mothers page,Viola Davis,Naomi Campbell. All these messages from Nigerians...Im a single mum, my kids havnt eaten for 5days. How do u carry ur begging internationally again. How will they even help?
DeletePeople are going through alot i understand but pls as women if u cannot feed a child,lets forget d father now. If u as a woman cant provide d bare minimum of feeding a child pls and pls close ur legs and dont bring them to suffer. Im not even talkn of fine clothing,if u cant provide food... You are doing a huge diservice to urself and to that child.
Very good message and I hope people will listen.
DeleteBegging is better than stealing but turning it into a days job is also criminal.
One came to my gate begging for food, yet she had two kids below 3 and was pregnant again, like how.
I asked her about family planning and she said she will start after she gives birth.
I told her even me giving her, I have just two kids cus I intend to give them the best.
We are adopting the whole "baby mama" rubbish, you know you don't like working hard, why get pregnant, then you will start dragging baby daddies. Birth the number of kids you can afford as a single person (even if you are married) cus you never know tomorrow.
Some give birth and move on to other men they hope will raise that kid, that one impregnates them and leaves too.
This is not America, the government will not take care of those kids.
Stop adopting rubbish
Also, I think this issue of contraceptive should also be introduced to single people.
DeleteDon't be having random sex without protection abeg, if you find someone you feel you are exclusive with but not ready for a child kindly use contraceptives.
You people should forget all these long stories. You will be surprised that those baby Mamas begging on Instagram are Yahoo boys fishing for their victims. Corruption is just too embedded in our system in this country .
DeleteThose ones on begging on celebrity pages are yahoo boys
DeleteSome beggers you see in social media are Yahoo boys ooh
DeleteSo you think there is work everywhere in Nigeria.
ReplyDeleteIf you see beggars, you do one of two things;
Give them what they are begging you for,
OR
Don't give them...
Your rant amounts to nothing. 🤧🤧🤧🤧
You are clearly one of those she is referring to. Her rant amounts to something because it is HER money.
DeleteYou lie! Her rant is valid. As an adult, you don't go around making babies you can't cater for and you expect someone else to help cater for them. There are still menial jobs one can do to survive in this present day Nigeria. Don't go around begging on the internet to feed your kids. Nobody sends you to make decisions you can't take responsibility for. Being a baby mama intentionally without a day job or skill is totally wrong. Na you the woman go suffer am pass in this our obodo Nigeria. Take heed, ladies!
Delete11:30 kpele when you were hatching children like eggs you dinner know ba? Kpele.
DeleteAnnoymous 11:30, Ehi is so ABSOLUTELY RIGHT AND SPOT ON!!! Irresponsible people think adulthood is being ripe for sex without the responsibilities that comes with unprotected sex. Then when the kids come, they are so entitled and believe people owe them/are their ATM. So they use "children as gift from God" to blackmail people into pitying, giving and giving them until they run one down. Why have kids when you can't afford food and water for yourself? Why bring a child(ren) into this world with no plans for them?
DeleteBeggars dat can afford Smart phone and Data....okay.
DeleteMy dear everyone dey broke,including me sef but i know withn myself even me cant handle more than 2/3kids. You cant see me having 5 even though me and my husband are working;we simply cant afford it.
Let us have the amount we can give the best quality of life.
Even training kids is tedious and alot of work. Dangote wey born just 3girls has his reasons.
This anon is another broke baby mama, she is talking to you.
DeleteMost of you ranting in these comments also beg for one thing or the other.
DeleteRight on this blog, you beg. If someone begs you, give or don't give. Leave
the person alone. You don't know her story enough to jump into conclusion.
She no thief, she no snatch person husband, na beg she dey beg. 😮😮😮
14.24 it's never too late to change your attitude that sees begging as no big deal.
DeleteTrue talk.
ReplyDeleteNo matter what you are going through, there is always something you can do our there
If you cannot care for a baby, don't get pregnant abeg. Don't o about having sex and expect giving birth to spoons.
I met one recently, she can't even feed herself. When my Friend and I tried advising her to stop giving birth and concentrate on the two she has, she said o, s nohe go still give birth to like 3 more and name them after her Grandpa and two uncle's respectively.
I just SMH
Lol.
DeleteUseless men and women
DeleteThe one that gets me angry is 'forcing' your responsibility on someone.
ReplyDeleteEntitlement mentality,menh I can't deal.
I don't judge anybody,make sure you work and give your child a good life.
Nobody owes you.
Whether your child is hungry or not ,it is your responsibility.
You don't have children ,fold your hands and be waiting for another person to take up your responsibility.
To help someone is not by force.
I'm telling you very irritating.
DeleteThey will enter bus with their several children expecting people to naturally lap them.
If you bring that child near me ehn, you wont like what you will hear.
Lap that child in your head since you are allergic to common sense.
I love children and I don't mind doing so when you ask politely.
DeleteStella. Many of the poor are EXTREMELY WICKED.
DeleteEmphasis on extreme.
You decide to help them by employing them and giving them a much better life and they suddenly become entitled and greedy.
My last experience broke my heart into a thousand pieces, you clothe , feed them, pay salaries, pay school fees and yet they turn around and rob you.
Most of Ngerian society is terrible
@ anon:14:13
DeleteHonestly, the worst thing that could happen to you is being poor,greedy and evil.
Not everyone deserves your help.
Those ones are accursed creatures
DeleteShes talking from frustration. Beggars don full her dms I guess.
ReplyDeleteEhi, stop giving them cos they'll just open more accounts to scam you. Most of them are scammers
We don't have it all .
DeleteI have made up my mind that if I want to help anybody again, I will choose someone that has value.
Helping nuisances will cost you your reputation.
Not everyone deserves help.
Truth be told,the rant is well placed. Ladies please learn to use contraceptive. Do not trap a man with pregnancy las las na you go suffer. How do you breed innocent children in poverty...
ReplyDeleteYea life may happen as she said but let's try and live responsible.
Lovelace
Na condition make crayfish bend
ReplyDeleteSome people had to take away shame just to ask another person for help
I dont think people derive joy from begging but since they dont have a choice
May we not depend on others for survival
Some people are actually professional beggars. They don't see anything wrong with it.
DeleteNa condition shaa
DeleteAt least be making effort.
Imagine strangers feeling entitled to your own money,that shit piss me off.
If it is easy,go make your own.
The worst among them are those begging with bad attitude,once you ignore them ,they will troll all your generation.Reason why they don't grow.
It's not in all cases that they genuinely lack and need help. Some takes pleasure in begging. Pray not to encounter the real annoying beggers...
DeleteThis is a really tight situation especially as beautiful and innocent babies are involved. It's not easy but ladies need to realized that it's best to have the number of kids they can take care of. How long will one keep begging? Naija get as e be already. Do anything meaningful and sensible to cater for you and your family. It's well jare.
ReplyDeleteOf all the languages in the world,she choose to speak the truth👍👍
ReplyDeleteFrom a fellow biochemist, greatest metabolite
ReplyDeleteSeriously annoting trend. Some have turn begging to work and have become serial beggers. Like seriously they need to take responsibility for their life. I understand when someone falls on hard times but not a situation of every month or every other month you always have one story or the other to beg for money
ReplyDeleteThere is one I know in Delta state, dated man for 5 weeks and decided to carry belly.
ReplyDeleteMan says I don't want ooo
Women says na by force.
Pikin Don come, she dey disturb man.
Women get sense oooo, you cannot trap man with belle.
Is her name Jumaima, a very useless runs girl like that.
DeleteFor some single moms( by choice or by circumstance),it's mostly shame that makes them choose the begging route. I rather beg you to help me do something than have to beg to eat for just that day.
ReplyDeleteI remember how I used to fry yam, plantain and the likes at our junction not too long ago to take care kids. An old school friend of mine from way back sec sch saw me and acted like she didn't know me when I greeted her surprisingly. I didn't even know that she was living on same street. Abeg I move o so long it was paying some small bills for me then.
It's the entitlement part that is really wrong.
Begging for help to stand is one thing,but having the mindset that the person must do it by fire by force,that one no follow
I can never see a friend, classmate anybody I know without greeting them and encouraging them.I helped set up an orphan classmate/friend for life. Immediately she started working, husband came. Her nice attitude drew my pity more. I imagined myself in that situation and wept. Ever since she started working she's been glowing and thankful. She told me how our class mates pretend not to see her. And btw she wasn't begging when I saw and stepped in.
DeleteLet's not give the silly impression that single mothers are lazy. Most of them are hard working. Those who move from DM to DM are the exception. That a few single mothers sent you you dms is not enough for your generalisation. I have friends that were raised by single mothers, friends that very successful today. I know a woman who makes Akpu to sell, her two sons her in a a Catholic school where she pays their fees without help from anybody. She is not educated but very determined to give her two kids the very best. She makes loads of personal sacrifice, I hadly see her wear decent clothes. Please lets stop this nonsense about single mothers and respect their choices to have their kids instead of aborting their pregnancies like most women.
ReplyDeleteYen yen yen
Delete@ Alexandra
DeleteShe is referring to lazy ones that don't want to work but rely on begging.
Nothing is wrong in asking for help but don't use begging as a means of surviving.
I am amazed to see even those going on prayer posts launching prayers agreeing with this bullsheet. As though prayers are not a form of begging too. This woman is annoyed by the few showing up in her DM and speaking so low about single mothers, yet our God is receiving billions of prayers daily and not complaining.
DeleteImagine if she was a queen sitting on a throne governing a kingdom. Imagine how she would treat ppl.. Acting as though DM cannot be turned off. Mtscccchw.
Because God is God. Ehi is a human, not God, you cannot compare the two.
DeleteThe point is anon 14:27, a true child of God does not become annoyed because she is being asked to give alms.
DeleteThe same energy she took to make that post is the same energy she could take to research charities that help single mothers and make a post of guidance and assistance to put those in need in connection with aid.
Who get requests for help like Stella does. You ever see Stella making posts like these? You don't see her do solutions instead. Singles and Mingles, Shoki, Christmas giveaways, Free adverts for small business owners, and connecting those in need with sources of help.
Ehi had the opportunity to be useful to God and her fellow humans and failed miserably.
15.50 until you are in her shoes being bombarded with emails everyday, you are you are not in a position to tell her she failed.
DeleteAnd Stella isn't bombarded by emails everyday, Genevieve isn't, Omotola isn't, Ini? Is Ehi the wealthiest or most known Nigerian? She failed an opportunity, that opportunity to use the bombardment for something good. Yes, she did! Instead she come on to berate single mothers. Just for clarity I am not a mother and my mother was not a single mother, so I have no ulterior motives for speaking against her post. I saw through her fckry and called it out. Sorry for those who it pained.
Delete20.15 you should have ignored the comment from the "amazing human" who knows everything about Ehi from outside her circles
DeleteKpomo lipped human
Well, Ehi is not Genevieve, she is not Ini and she is not Stella. It's her page and she has every right to speak out against whatever she chooses to speak out against. She is a single mum as well FYI, so I really don't see your point. On your own page, you can choose to write whatever you want to write. Let her be!!
DeleteShe made sense with this post, I understand her position. But sometimes it's that simple and straightforward.
ReplyDeleteMy experience speaks loudest. I got pregnant and our marriage was cancelled by my then boyfriend now husbands family. The father objected to the marriage because I was not from their place, that as the first son he must take a wife from their place. My parents were already on my neck, threatening fire and brimstones for getting pregnant outside wedlock. I was sent to an aunty in the north, without any further help whatsoever. That was at the advent of GSM, so no phone and means of communication, we lost touch. Staying with my aunty up north was hell, I became their slave, did all sorts without being appreciated. Every moment condemnation for bringing shame to the family blah blah blah, how they wasted money sending me to the university and I graduated disappointedly with pregnancy.
But God sent me a friend - corps member who took mother and child along after her service year back to Lagos. Introduced me to SDK family blog. Helped me put up a post here, I got assistance and started something small but meaningful that changed my life in a way. I participated in the popular single and mingle post and God spoke on my behalf. Because I reconnected with my baby daddy, the rest they say is history. The same father who had refused him getting married to me approved our marriage. But you see that journey between the marriage breakdown and before I met my divine helper; I begged, begged begged, begged till there was no one to beg again. It was my begging that connected me to this Angel - sadly she's gone now, she was a stickler.
As valid as her point seems, sometimes hope does not exist for some. And begging is the only hope insight. It now depends on either turning it into your day job or hustle. Or decisively breaking away from it once you are able to beg enough to trigger a change in your life by starting something. It's the one who wears this shoe that knows how bad it pains. Yet there are many who deliberately take advantage of other people's goodwill, that is a matter I can't judge. The dark days were best erased but it shaped who I became. Nothing like having a personal relationship with God, I'm not talking about going to church.
I used to teach, but now work somewhere better than teaching. I still do same business, and other side rhings. A wife, a mother of three lovely children with the best man I could ever have. Now considering the harsh economic situation prevalent both self created and the global pandemic. More people are begging, it's not a right nor an entitlement. Sometimes it's just the only choice some of us have, like I had then. Surviving is anything but easy, most would lack direction and lost in their own mind. It's not easy but doable, if you have the right people around you.
Your story🥺what a turnaround💛
DeleteFirst and foremost there was never any marriage breakdown. You were not married.
DeleteYou people fu.cked, you got pregnant, father in law refused you to marriage.
What I'm surprised at is, even if hed did not know where you were, didnt he know your family house?
Couldn't he drop money and other items to your family every month so they could deliver to you?
Did he ever make any attempts to reach you and the child?
You tried to go back to him.
I wouldn't.
Thank GOD for your life.
DeleteThe question should be, was the man ready for a child?
DeleteDid the man want the child?
But you brought shame to your family by getting pregnant when they sent you to the university na. You people should be taking responsibility abeg.
Delete19.43 take a trip to Jamaica!
DeleteI am a single mother and I will do my best to give my baby the best. Nobody will do to my child what that idiot did to me.
ReplyDeleteJust because I don't depend on others to care for my child, you assaulted me right? I leave you to God o. I forgive you.
I AM NOT A VICTIM
#NOTORAPE
Please be comforted
DeleteVery valid rant.
ReplyDeleteBegging is now a day job for most people on social media..
Life is really strange. If the woman aborts she is looked down on, if she gives the baby up for adoption she is looked down on, if she keeps the baby and resorts to begging she is looked down on. The idea that she needs to outline to someone how and why she is a single mother before her condition is justified in their eyes and she is deemed worthy of their empathy says a lot about the hearts of many.
ReplyDeleteMy dear, you seem like you have reached your limit, so why not modify your dm setting or turn it off all together. I am sure clients have an alternative method of reaching you other than dm.
Instead of castigating and passing judgments be grateful that you can be the giver and not the beggar. I Thank God the heart of God and man is not the same. None of us would not stand a chance in prayer if God shared these sentiments. Thank God for His eternal grace and mercies.
Fyi, I am not a mother and not begging anybody for anything online.
Women bear the brunt so should take precautions and not put themselves in that situation in the first place - for the avoidable ones.
DeleteThe best solution is not to spread your legs like shoprite door. Because at the end of the day you as the woman will suffer.
DeleteI repeat you as the woman will suffer.
@anon 14:29, did you read where one bv is a single mother due to rape? Another resorted to begging and connected with her earth angel and her life is a complete 180 today.
DeleteHusbands die everyday, some men walk out on their families without a backward glance. No single mother should first have to outline her life story and why she is a single mother to anybody to earn their compassion. If they beg you and you feel moved to give then give. If you don't feel moved to give then keep it pushing, don't come with the holier than thou attitude acting as judge, jury and executioner on anybody's life. Some know not what their children and generations will pass through in their lifetime. Even the rich today can lose it all tomorrow and find themselves begging. Remain humble and leave all judgments to God cause only God knows the full story of the beggar's life.
Begging is a darn hard choice to make because you are stripped down to nothing. One BV yesterday was in the prayer post because she/he did not pay the bus conductor the fare just so there would be money to buy something to eat. This is the reality of life, hard choices made everyday to simply survive in a wicked world. Who is anyone to judge the beggar? Beggars are on social media so too are spammers, scammers, trolls and viruses, but only those asking for aid are fitting for call outs.. mtschhhhw
15.35 next time, before you proceed to write an epistle, please read well. I said FOR THE AVOIDABLE ONES, i.e. those who consciously choose to.
DeleteKeep having sex without protection you hear. You know you are not able to care for a child without help and you are opening legs to collect sperm, keep it up.
DeleteMoney no kuku dey naija again so nobody will give any of you.
This also goes to married people breeding children, continue, na una go suffer las las.
17:59, who are you to determine which is avoidable and which isn't. That the problem, you want to decide who is deserving, who is justified for help. I will write ten million epistles if needs be.
Delete19:45, Read what you have written. I pity you.
Delete19.45. Loooool. Find happiness
Delete21.52 please and please learn to read. A person who consciously decides to trap a man with pregnancy, is that not avoidable?! Yes or no?
DeleteStop being sentimental.life is beyond sentiments.
ReplyDeleteSome people here do not understand. Ehi simply said stop giving birth to children you cannot take care of. She is not condenming single mothers. She is right even my father tell us we his children if you cannot take care of a child don't bring them into this world because it is pure evil and wickedness not to be able to care of the child/ children. Ability how will you feel when your child/children are constantly hungry and you cannot give them food? Not a good situation so please she is right and this is what our government should look into. In the western world young people are encouraged to use prevention atleast.
ReplyDeleteEhi thank you oh. They will see you have just two kids, they keep telling you to have more because they already have 5. When you refuse to give them money, they will say after all you have just two kids. Aunty, I dey still see small change remain because I have just TWO KIDS!!!
ReplyDeleteIf you people like, don't take heed.
Leave them.
DeleteLet them keep breeding like rabbits with the common sense of a mosquito.
Begging should not be a career or entitlement ridden
ReplyDeleteIt is well
How much is a carton of Condoms? If you must do it, use it. The prevalence of raw stuff and the lack of self control in poor countries is appalling. Here they a McMansion of 5 rooms has max 2/3 children and the rest are for enjoyment. They beg white women to birth but black women see men and having raw s* and babies as meal ticket. Nobody is Judging but if you sleep raw with Davido you already know why you did it. Condoms are very cheap! I sponsored my sister’s children throughout my younger years, stopped a few years ago to send mine to school as college is expensive here and she started pursuing my life with voodoo when I stopped forgetting that God saw the days of $2k, $500k, when $ was even much more expensive to send. I told her to slow down after the second she abused me at the time. Still I helped set up a store, pay school fees but after 5 decades she still relies on others and will do voodoo to waste your money if you refuse to give her. You can give any excuse but at the core of it is lack of self control. Condoms are free, coil is free at planned parenthood. Americans estimate that each child costs $300k by18yrs in affluent households, a reason I haven’t met someone with 4 kids except a Nigerian here (both physicians) who can afford it!
ReplyDeleteYou can give them the best if you don’t get carried away. Anything mine lacked is due to the selfishness and lack of self control and contentment of some extended family who milked my finances and my generosity till I borrowed sense and got delivered. I don’t know this woman but she is on point. Secretary of State Hilary & President Bill Clinton have 1 kid, Chelsea, President Obama & Michelle have 2, Malia and Sasha! Girls. If it’s in Naija they will keep giving birth hoping for a boy till they have 6 they can’t care for!
Stop breeding into poverty so you can have an excuse to carry out wickedness on those who lived a careful or God fearing life. Even if you are not wicked to others, it’s wicked to the kids when you bring them into the world of Kwashiorkor and begging. I’m sorry if I sound harsh but I’ve spent my earnings on 3 generations and it affected my life too! The sense of entitlement is annoying.