Stella Dimoko Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative....


Advertisement - Mobile In-Article

Tuesday, October 26, 2021

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative....



Good afternoon Everyone. Please bear with me as this is somewhat a long read.

My name is Oyin and I’m 29 years of age. I graduated a couple years ago and no job. One of My biggest regret is the fact that I didn’t learn any skill while I was in school and immediately after then. 

My excuse was I wanted a 9-5 job because I loved structure and routine and I had no idea how to be come my own boss and running my own business. I live in one of the remotest area In ogun state with little or no opportunities (new site)with my parents. 

My friend recently asked me to come stay with her in Lagos but with the condition that I’ll have to fend for myself.

The issue I have now is the fact that my parents have refused to help me and
 Because of this reason, I have considered myself unlucky. My parents hardly give me money. Even while in school I had to write assignments for people so as to feed myself.

 In my final year, I didn’t receive any help from them. I remember breaking down in the cafe on the day I was to submit my project and I had nothing as the cafe guy said he wasn’t going to give me my project unless I paid the outstanding payment and when I called my mum and explained to her, all I heard was “God will do it”.

 I was surprised when my younger ones gained admission and they were ready to help them with anything from school fees to rent and during my turn I had to squat with a course mate. The last time my parents gave me money was in 2018 and I remember I had to literally cry before my daddy gave me. Couple weeks ago, he was able to get some money from a contract; he gave my mum and brothers but didn’t even give me a naira. He saw my attitude towards him changed and after much pestering, I told him considering we were all praying for the money to be released to him and he gave me 500 naira.

For years now, my parents have been insulting me about not having anything to do and not getting a job and talking about how Stagnant my enemy has been.

 Last year, I asked them for 5k to start this liquid soap business but they claimed not to have. I was able to check my daddy’s account balance that day and saw he had about 200k in his account but he claimed not to have anything. It was a lecturer in my school that helped me (he was the one that gave me the business idea during the lockdown period and later helped me when I told him I didn’t have money to start it).

 The business didn’t even move forward as they used half of the soap at home without paying after months of it being there without sale. Everyday, my dad keeps talking about how I have nothing doing, just sitting at home doing nothing and compares me to his nieces with their own businesses. Lord knows I’ve asked and asked but they’re not helping and they keep talking and insulting me about not having anything to do. (I’m already numb to their insults and I always try to mind my business at home. Like I don’t show feelings or reactions to anything happening at home anymore)

Now, my friend is asking me to come to the city for greener pastures and I asked my parents for money to start a business (I asked them to borrow me that I am going to pay back either every month or two months) while I’m there and they’re both claiming not to have. 

On Monday, My dad asked me to help make a transfer for him and I was able to see how much he had there (nb; I’m only asking for a 100k to start something despite it not being enough in this economy and the money I saw there is enough to give me the capital needed over and over again). Anyways, I made the transfer for him and got the information needed.

Right now, after seeing his account balance and knowing he has the money to borrow me, I don’t know if I should steal the money one night while he’s asleep and run away the next morning and cut off all ties from them. Not like I’m important to them anyways or I should continue begging and hope that one day they’ll finally consider me worthy to help me.

I don’t want to come off as an entitled child or something but they’re my only hope at this point. I would have looked for a job but there’s none where I stay and even in Nigeria as a whole, there’s scarcity of jobs as we know. The menial jobs I’ve been seeing, I will end up spending the whole salary on transport fare and even extra considering the distance from my house. 

A teaching job I even saw considered paying 2500 for a month. I’ve had to even do labourers for bricklayers; helping them fetch water they’ll use to build, I carry blocks as well and in the end they pay 1/1500 for the day. I can’t go to the city and be expecting my friend to feed me as well. Because of this issue, I’ve even considered even getting married to anyone willing to out of desperation just so I can leave their house and the insults will reduce. But going to a husband’s house as a liability is even worse.

Thank you.

Please if you have transport money, pack your bags and leave that house Immediately without stealing anything!!!

If you steal and a curse is placed on you in anger, that is even worse..... leave and go and hustle and stop depending on them, you are almost 30and there is still enough time for you to change your Narrative...

Good luck!!!


  1. You can ask your friend for a loan once you get something doing you pay back

  2. Don't steal o and i think it be nice you leave the house for them to go join your friend in Lagos since they have practically refused to stop hurling insults at you

    1. Don’t steal and run away o, if things gets tough in Lagos, you might have no choice but to head back home.
      Yes, helpers can get tired and kick you out.
      I do not pray this for you but a sharp Lagos babe must always have vex money and plan B. (Eko o gba gbere ra ra o).
      Bonne chance ma belle!

  3. What if u steal and u no come blow?

  4. Don't steal it just find your way opportunity will come and you will bounce back to life. It's well poster

  5. To be honest with you, you are actually entitled. All I see in your chronicles is my parent this and that.......what if you don't have one? Won't you learn how to survive? At 29 you can not use your brain to figure out something. Even with the phone in your hand, you can do something online. You claim there is no job anywhere in Nigeria, have you stepped out of your comfort zone. The jobs you see can only fetch you there, why not start from that, mingle with people and see if other opportunities will come up from there. Pls pardon my typo

    1. I totally agree with your comment.

    2. How is she entitled? Parent still help their children till they stand on their feet, not that they can't even afford it, but they can. Every time online, is it everyone online business works for?

    3. Why not help her "figure out something" that is why she is writing you. Not everyone is as gifted as you are.

    4. I got that same feeling, but decided not to address it, as I do not know the extent of the financial and emotional abuse she faced at home.

      Sometimes the environment creates energies in people. But she is obviously not a proud person, even with her education still willing to work on construction sites.

      The hand soap business was an excellent idea especially at the height of the pandemic, too bad those around her lacked vision and she did not have the strength to protect her products. And quite likely because nobody there believes in her.

    5. No please I don't think she is entitled...If it is true going with her story, her parents have not done much for her...Her parents may be in the category of people who will even be entitled when Oyin starts making money and they will expect her to give them money...She is their daughter please and not some random stranger....

    6. 15.48 but people without parents survive. Online business works for anyone who is committed enough to it.

    7. She is not entitled,for christsake she is their daughter. She has even proven that she can do anything when she took the construction job. That people without parents are making it doesn't mean they should abandon her. Let's call a spade a spade, they are evil parents.

    8. 17.54 they are evil parents but she can't change them, it's what it is and blaming them from now till tomorrow still won't change that. It would be better for her to focus that energy and expectation on the way forward for herself and forget about them.

    9. She’s not entitled, she’s trying to move out of her comfort zone but she needs some money to sustain her till she finds her feet in a new place. She can’t just go to the city and become dependent on her friend who is likely also struggling. It will take her about one month to settle in and start hustling and she needs money for that

    10. God's masterpiece26 October 2021 at 20:05

      Online business is not as easy as you think. It is highly competitive, to flourish she needs to build a customer base which needs lots of online presence and that requires a lot of data and then what about sponsoring of post.
      Online business is also capital based if it is your main hustle.
      Except just your WhatsApp status Sha.

    11. She's not entitled please.If truly they are her parents then they should be able to help her till she can stand on her feet...if they can help others(according to her), why not help her too. Poster..May the Lord send you the help that you need

    12. How is she entitled??please poster don't listen to this person.

      They are your parents and should be able to stand you. YES.Na dem bring you come this world to suffer. Irresponsible parents you have and somehow wicked and very partial .

      May God see you though and bring your divine helper,Amen.

  6. So much empathy reading this.
    God is our heavenly father. Jesus taught us to call him "our father in heaven"
    I did not see him mentioned in your narration.
    Call on him. Make Jesus your Lord and he will be a father to you.
    He alone should be your hope and not man that has a breadth in his nostril.
    You did not tell us what you studied and your results.
    Some reading you may have other options for you.

  7. I have never commented on any post. I've been a silent blog reader for years but on this I have to speak up to let you know you are not alone. In my own case I am even the only surviving child. My dad is retired and as far back as I can remember, my mum has made me feel like a burden. I'm living on my own now, trying to hustle but they keep insisting I must go back home, and do what?�� I have had peace since I started living on my own. The emotional abuse I went through ehn, only God knows. Please gather some money and leave, you will be glad you did. Hustle hard and make your own money, you will be glad you did. Love and light��

  8. Hmmm, I would have said take up a live in nanny job but...

    1. At that age she might even senior her madam and one must be wary of the husband before he will start harassing her with penis.

      Poster how about learning a skill such as copywriting, SEO or cooking etc

  9. you can stay in their house. and look for sales girl job, my first job was 5k as a graduate na sales girl. used the money to apply for jobs online got my present job, I can pay rent and feed myself.

  10. I have never commented on any post. I've been a silent blog reader for years but on this I have to speak up to let you know you are not alone. In my own case I am even the only surviving child. My dad is retired and as far back as I can remember, my mum has made me feel like a burden. I'm living on my own now, trying to hustle but they keep insisting I must go back home, and do what?�� I have had peace since I started living on my own. The emotional abuse I went through ehn, only God knows. Please gather some money and leave, you will be glad you did. Hustle hard and make your own money, you will be glad you did. Love and light��

  11. Please do not steal his money, keep asking, one day he will give you.continue with your menial jobs and the Good Lord who sees your heart and hard work will surely reward you one day.

  12. Oyin please learn a skill first, don't be so quick in opening a business out of desperation so you don't end up making losses...If you can get a cleaning job or office assistant jobs in any organization or school so you can earn money first cause the truth is it will be hard for anyone to loan you money except for your parents...

    I will not advise you to steal but I know that if you take that money without their consent, your conscience will not be at rest and you will be haunted....For me, your parents curse will not come to pass even if you took it because according to you, they have never helped you one way or the other.

    Please discuss with that your friend beckoning you to come to Lagos, tell her the situations of things; tell her if she can lend you some money for the time being and until when you get something doing and then you will pay her back..PLEASE PAY HER BACK..Once you get to Lagos, please and please go out and seek for honest work; you can start as a salesgirl, cleaning or office assistant jobs in any hospital, school or small organization...Even if it is any big mamaput, help them to wash plates or get involved in cooking so you can make some small small money and save then every month, you can get your friend something no matter how little...

    Please be very wise, Lagos is very rugged and you need to be smart...Just forgive your parents but you need to leave that environment..All the best...

    1. I like the advice of having a skill.

    2. I think she need to humble herself and learn a skill very IMPORTANT but don't she need money to learn any skill???

  13. I almost wanted to tell u to steal but I reckon those parents of urs no too send u, they may cast a heavy spell of poverty on u. So just brave it out and move. You will be shocked tins may turn around sooner than later.
    May God shine His favor on u.

  14. Please don't steal,just get tfare and leave that house and please be closer to God.

  15. Some parents from hell. Abi did they tell dem something about you from false prophets or Alfas and juju priests, why the hate on you.

    Leave the house, with God on your side you will conquer. Don't let them know where you are or what you are doing. Keep them in the dark including your siblings and see how your narrative will change.
    They are just trying to truncate your greatness.

  16. Leave and go and don't look back. You also have to work on your self-esteem and self-confidence. If you are going to Lagos with that same fearful, beaten down, low feeling self then nothing will change for you. You have to believe in yourself and know in your spirit that you can achieve anything. Go and be prepared to hustle. Please also go back to exploring the liquid soap business and see what comes of it.

    Your friend is giving you a leg up, but you do not know how that friend is living so be prepared to work hard and build up yourself, don't become dependent or a burden to her.

    Do not steal anything from your parents. 200k is not any portion of money. If a serious emergency was to hit your family that money could do nothing. It is only because you don't see money it look like plenty, but that is very little money for two ppl to have for their older years, very little. Keep doing the manual labour and save your bus fare and a little more for emergencies and go to Lagos. Since you are in a remote place stock up on some food items to take with you since food prices are higher on Lagos. If you can carry some yams, plantains, veggies and fruits with you at least you do not show up at your friend's place empty handed.

    Remember that with you gone to the big city your parents and other siblings may start asking for handouts. I am not saying don't help, but do not impoverish yourself to carry them. You must remember why you left and put yourself and your survival first. And do not ever have unprotected sex with anyone. Many young country girls leave for the big city with big dreams next thing end up trusting the wrong man. Please know that their are many deceivers and charlatans in Lagos. Keep God close always

    It would be great to get a follow up from you to see how things are going. Heck, you could even start your own blog or You Tube podcast chronicling your transition and make some money out of it.

  17. Don't steal just leave in peace, hustle from a distance try and forget you have a family while in Lagos it will help you heal.... goodluck.

  18. Hmmmm...are you sure there is something your parents are not telling you? Or it is those type of parents that turn first born to assistant parent/hustler or last born to housemaid. My dear, it is what it is, many orphans made it in life without parents. Go to your friend in Lagos, for her to invite you, she is a nice person, open up to her about everything and beg her for any help/job/business/skill she can assist you with. Doors will open for you in this life and you will testify.

    Please, mind your attitude, there's something prevalent with some ladies, once they are no more in that desperate situation they used to be, they start misbehaving to their helpers, competing with them, acting up, some even badmouth and sleep/snatch their partners. Bear in mind that this person has done something that your parents refused to do for you, Be eternally grateful to her and be as humble and helpful as possible in the house and in other affairs. All the best.

  19. please don’t even take their money, enter Lagos go hungry I swear kpatakpata Na one month things go change for you as long as you’re willing to start small... fleee from them and watch how your life go change for the better, as long as you get accommodation Na small challenge , good luck oyin

  20. Are you sure you are a true child of that family? I'm just wondering why they would treat you differently from your siblings.

    You need to start living like you have no family and are alone in this world. Stop expecting anything from them. I wish you the best.

  21. You can easily get a nanny or house help job in Lagos, they house you, feed you and also pay you. You can be able to plan your life from there. My current help is a trained tailor, and had to resort to the job to save up money to start up her business someday. Her payment goes to an account where she saves it. I can recommend some agents to you to register under them, you can plan your life from there. Good luck

  22. Those advising to ask the friend for a loan....ehrrr I don't think so. If I am that friend i'd probably take back my offer of accommodation, because clearly, you cant fend for yourself and will be dependent on me. Don't discourage the friend by being an extra burden..Plead with your dad that you have gotten a job at your friends base, and she is willing to accomodate you if you pay a part of the rent. Make up a salary in your head and tell him, that if he borrows you, you will pay back within a time frame from your salary. Make sure your acting is believable, kneel down and beg if need be, that this new opportunity must not pass you by. Good luck.

  23. 29 years. You don big na. What if you were an orphan? Wetin you for do? Thank God say you even go school. A lot of people didn't have that opportunity. Forget what is happening at home and move on. That's part of your story. There's obviously nothing you can do about it. They say when life throws you lemons, you make lemonade. Me I say when life throws you stones, you build a house. Hehe. Babe relax. Everything will be fine.

    1. Leave your father's house. Go to Lagos.

    2. Get menial jobs. Do several jobs as much as you can. You sound like one who is wired to work not do business. Get any noble job. Teaching, housekeeping, sales attendant, fuelling station attendant, anything. But make sure you leave the house everyday. If not one day, dem go say na you thief sometin. You know as Satan dey do. You can also start a side hustle after you've saved up from your job. Check out online opportunities. Well things too. Go to campuses and sell. Slay mamas are looking for things to spend their money on.

    3. Don't eat your friend's food while in her house. I repeat, don't eat her food. Na food dey cause problem. if you don't eat her food, you'll last long there, giving you ample time to get your own place. If she complains, jokingly tell her that she should not worry. That you don't want to be a burden to her and that you are an adult and should be feeding yourself. Once you get something doing, please leave her food alone.

    4. Save, save, save. Save virtually every kobo you are not spending. Stay with her with the mind that your stay time is short. Don't go and relax. From day one, start saving up to get your own place no matter how small. E get why.

    5. Respect yourself and live within your means. Forget all you see around you. Weave your hair if you don't have money to do it. Better still, cut it and be using styling gel to look good. Buy cheap but nice clothes and use cheap perfumes to smell good. Never wear slippers except the job requires you to do so. Always have your best look. There are nice sandals and shoes that are very cheap. PLEASE DON'T USE YOUR FRIEND'S THINGS.

    6. Eat what you can afford. Even if it is one meal a day. No do long throat. You'll eat big very soon. It's just for a while.

    7. Start investing even from 5000 naira. Before you know it, you'll look back and realize how big you've become. Investment is the sole reason for saving up. You will slay later big time.

    8. Make a habit of giving. Daily. Let's say, you decide that everyday, you give 50 naira to beggars. Wonders will happen to you financially. Please don't fail to do this. When God increases you, increase your giving. If you are a Christian, please, DON'T EVER MISS PAYING YOUR TITHE. Ever.

    9. Don't leave the house daily without praying seriously. Life is a mystery. So you gotta ask the only One who can demystify it for you.

    10. Be careful. Don't open up to anyone. Keep to yourself. Make God your confidant.

    11. Start preparing and praying for marriage but don't get into relationship now that you're broke if not, hmmnnn. Men go carry ya eye see nwii.

    12. Build yourself. Read books. Socialize but with caution. Gather knowledge. Move to the kind of circle of people you want to be with for life and make friends. Don't go asking the big ones among them for help. Just learn. Keep your ears to the ground.

    13. Give yourself time. Don't be in a hurry to blow. You no be volcano. Lol.

    14. When you blow, and your people ask you for help, help them. It hurts. But that way, you'd be heaping coals of fire on their heads.

    I hope with these few points of mine, I have been able to convince you that your future is brighter than the sun. Lol.

    It is well with you. Keep your head up.

  24. All the comments am seeing is leave your parent house
    To where please?
    This is not nollywood(asaba movie) while trekking your helper will just locate you..

    Poster I pray help locate you.
    I can feel what you are passing through because have been there.

    1. Didn't you read her friend in Lagos invited her? Let her go there and hustle, this registered nanny apps is a good idea because if you qualify, you get free accommodation and feeding and can save money for the future.

    2. Anon.17.09 if you read well.the friend will accommodate her.
      But she will fend for herself.

      She needs money to be able to hold on for a while before she get a job.

      So she can't leave the house with cash.

    3. You asked "To where" in your question, it wasn't her not having cash you were referring to. Just saying.

  25. This your story is not strange now. Alot of parents don't take care of their kids. There's only a handful of parents that actually do.and they wont till the end of time, mind you they expect you to take care of them at old age o, because you're their child. Very wicked set of people. And no you're not entitled but they are the entitled one. They brought you into this world to satisfy their selfish desires but look at how they left you stranded in a lonely world. We all need someone to help us stand and our first point of contact should be our parents. If you can't provide financially atleast be loving. If you haven't experienced this you wont understand posters pain. This person isn't lazy but just needs a stepping stone. Parenting is beyond just paying school fees, we need emotional support too. Poster you made a mistake by not fending for yourself. You realised they were this way early enough you should have jakpa teh teh. Better get up and go and start selling pure water somewhere cause those people no send you o,they are waiting for you to feed them too. You should have started fending for yourself way before now.its not too late to start anyway. LEAVE! And don't look back and while at it please do not do same to your kids. Its very unfair to bring kids to this world and not fend for them

    1. BUT her parents provide for the siblings, that's part of what she mentioned up there.

    2. It's very unfair how some parents treat their own children, very selfish people.
      May God send help to you Oyin.

    3. If she should blow now, you will see them worshipping her. Mtshewweew.

  26. Leave that house, you are a graduate for pete sake. Be creative, and surprise your parents. The only problem I see is that, you have conditioned your mind to "only" focus on an eight to five job. And that is a difficult place to sit in joblessness. Starting a business might not work for you. Come out of your shell and look for work - any work would do at this phase, because your mentality needs conviction from within to set it in play.

  27. Try to explain to your friend the situation of things at home so she can assist you with some money to go over to Lagos.
    Create a linkedin profile and have your profile show you are open to work, set your job search to several occupations that you may be familiar with like customer care, PA, Admin officer etc.
    Look for other jobs too like cleaner, store assistant, sales girl etc You can visit supermarkets around your friend's place to look for an opening.
    Let your friend see your effort of looking for something to do
    Try to assist in the house upkeep too.
    You will definitely get something doing, no matter how small it may seem, start there and build up CV.
    Also remember to cast your burden to God, ask Him to order your steps and bless whatever you find to do and He will surely come through for you.
    Love & Light
    (Ps. remember to come back to share your testimony with us when you get something doing)

  28. My dear leave the house first, your parents are toxic.I experienced that but not with my parents for they are late but with uncles and aunts.Once you leave and cut ties with them for sometime,you will start making progress.Go to your friend's place,look for jobs atleast teaching of 20k from there you start.I had a similar story, yours is even better but I thank God for his grace. The worst thing to happen in one's life is to be with toxic people.

  29. learn a skill first. my friend from uni learnt how to design and sew after we graduated and there was no job coming, right now she has her shop with 2 apprentices and a car and a good job too as she combined her dressmaking business with getting an MSC. YOU NEED TO STOP COMPLAINING and LEARN A SKILL. within a year or two you will start making a steady income. continue living with your parents for the free accommodation and food.

    1. You need money to learn a skill and this poster sounds like she's at her lowest, As in totally broke.

  30. Poster you parents have written you off.
    You need to make a move. Sorry babe
    You need to prove to yourself alone that you can help yourself and better your life.
    So pack and go to that lagos, even if you have to hock pure water for the first week in other to be able to feed. Since you will be living in the house free of charge, just make a move and God will show up for you.
    It is well

  31. For you to have a smart phone is a good starting point in the first place. You have access to the internet of things.

    Please, try and save up some money from the menial jobs you're doing, then join your friend in Lagos. You don't need to be a burden on anyone. Moreover, I hope it's not Olosho work your friend is doing in Lagos.

    Finally, turn to God. He's the ultimate helper

  32. You are holding yourself back because you think you have someone to fall back on.
    Act like you are an orphan and your mind will start working for you.
    Right now you are still acting like a toddler.

  33. Sorry to say but you are an entitled old are you? In some countries, at 18 you leave the house, no arguments or you stay and contribute to bill payments...go ahead steal what you did not work for!

  34. Are you sure you are their real child. Maybe you were adopted

  35. In addition to the plethora of advices, poster you need some kind of religious support, depending on your faith. One: To give you hope of a better tomorrow. Two: Some religious groups can help you in settling down quickly in your new environment and possibly assist you in getting a job.

  36. It seems as though you might not be their child because no real parents should make any of their children go through this type of suffering,and considering the way they look after your siblings .I don't even know how to advise you. Whatever you want to do now you need money.maybe you should look for a way to borrow money from your uncle or friend .

    1. NO BUMAN BEING should make anybody suffer.

  37. Poster have you considered talking with your friend that is willing to accommodate you in lagos by telling her your present condition, she may help you out of your predicament.

    Leave your parents with their money, go hustle so that you can earn respect from your parents.

  38. U need to learn a skill poster,just try to learn something that’s not expensive to learn (hair making,tye & dye,sewing,food business) just learn something.what if u were an orphan will u have killed urself by now!! Learn a skill then move to the city and start looking for a job(secretary,receptionist,sales girl) any one then u can practice ur skill as a side hustle,stop depending on people too much,human beings will disappoint or fail u,learn a skill,move out from ur parents place afterwards and go hustle,success has many friends .when u start making money those same people that rejected u might at some point fall back to u for help.i wish u good luck.

  39. Aiya...I understand the part about having a job with a routine. My desire for one has robbed me of years of productivity but I am still rooting for one though I have a business(business no be for everybody).
    I advise you ask your friend for a loan and leave. Also try applying for NIRSAL Loan, I think they are still on.
    Most important thing is for you to leave your parents house and when you start making it; please don't be in a rush to announce it to them. Guard your tongue.


Disclaimer: Comments And Opinions On Any Part Of This Website Are Opinions Of The Blog Commenters Or Anonymous Persons And They Do Not Represent The Opinion Of

Pictures and culled stories posted on this site are given credit and if a story is yours but credited to the wrong source,Please contact and corrections will be made..

If you have a complaint or a story,Please Contact Via
Mobile Phone +4915210724141