Hmmmm....
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
INFERTILE HUSBAND
My aunt has been married for years without a child, she went through hell because her husband wasn't supportive even to the extent of taking sides with his mother anytime she comes to harass and threaten her cos of her childlessness.
She had told him she got pregnant as a teen but lost the baby just after childbirth but anytime he gets angry he torments her calling her a barren woman and accusing her of having her womb removed due to constant abortions in her past.
He refused to go for medical checkup or even pray about the problem till one day he suddenly told her he was tired of her and wanted medical proof so he would have something to show when asked why he drove his wife away. At the hospital the doctor was able to convince him to do some fertility test.
The result of the test is out and he has been begging her not to leave him cos the test shows he is infertile and can never have a child.
My aunt is out of the house but is now wondering whether to go back to the husband or not cos the husband's mother and even their pastors have been coming to beg on his behalf.
My aunt has been married for years without a child, she went through hell because her husband wasn't supportive even to the extent of taking sides with his mother anytime she comes to harass and threaten her cos of her childlessness.
She had told him she got pregnant as a teen but lost the baby just after childbirth but anytime he gets angry he torments her calling her a barren woman and accusing her of having her womb removed due to constant abortions in her past.
He refused to go for medical checkup or even pray about the problem till one day he suddenly told her he was tired of her and wanted medical proof so he would have something to show when asked why he drove his wife away. At the hospital the doctor was able to convince him to do some fertility test.
The result of the test is out and he has been begging her not to leave him cos the test shows he is infertile and can never have a child.
My aunt is out of the house but is now wondering whether to go back to the husband or not cos the husband's mother and even their pastors have been coming to beg on his behalf.
Hmmmmmm this is really somehow........
So if she goes back to him what will be the solution? he cant even give her his sperm to use for IVF or surrogate....
Will he allow her get pregnant by someone else to compensate her for all the rubbish he made her go through?
I dont even know what to conclude she does but she is the only one who can decide what she wants from them.....
Tell her not to allow them use her to cover their shame because they were ging to throw her out and disgrace her thinking she was barren.... wicked lot
If reverse was the case, the man would have thrown her out.
ReplyDeleteOzigbo ozigbo
DeleteSuit happens. There's nothing she has seen now that she has not developed skin thick enough to take and forgive for her own sake.
DeleteShe should go back, accept the apologies and restitution, then they both plan a way forward. She is not a child. This should be handled with maturity, faith and courage. Adoption is an option, IVF with donor eggs and sperm(she should be mindful of her age and health condition and finances), and they may even decide to remain childless and enjoy companionship and live an exciting life.
I will never advise her to go back. Wicked people are wicked, they never change. They will find new ways to torment her.
DeleteMy dear, he was planning to throw her out, that’s why he took her to do test. God caught him there and the doctor made him do test too.
DeleteHumans can be very wicked.
Look at him now.
If I were her, I’d leave him. Not because of the new discovery but because the situation has made her realize that he’s a wicked man and people never change. Given the opportunity, he’d be wicked to her over and over again.
She should leave. This kind of man even if they agree and she has children in his name, it is only a matter of time he will tell her, the children are not his and that she should look after her kids as he is not the father.
DeleteShe should move on with her life. She has suffered enough. If the tables were turned she'd be out on the streets completely shamed already
ReplyDeleteAre you talking about fertility treatment with someone else's sperm or what?
ReplyDeletePlease she should not commit adultery as a correction of infertility.
If she is willing to go back,let them agree and try for adoption. Either ways your aunt has got to be emotionally tough and give them fire for fire if the man's family dares to say anything to the contrary, after all their present state is the man's fault.
ReplyDeletePeople like that will still torment the child,he does not love her rather he wants to hide his shame
DeleteThe question is, if she was the infertile one, would he beg her to stay? I mean he was ready to throw her out but now he knows he's the one with the problem, he is "humble"🙄
ReplyDeleteThis! 👌👌👌
DeleteEnter your comment...wicked husband
ReplyDeleteIf tables were turned that man would have labelled her publicly that she has committed countless abortions but now he is the infertile one and everyone is begging her to save his face.
DeleteMADAM, DO NOT GO BACK TO THAT MAN,IF YOU CAN, GO YOUR SEPARATE WAYS FOR PETE SAKE.
Enter your comment...wicked husband
ReplyDeleteGo back where? Someone that was ready to throw her out and marry another woman. I comment my reserve😠😠
ReplyDeleteThe woman should go back at her own risk.
DeleteHe already had a standby fiancee until the nuclear bomb dropped that he was impotent and firing blanks
DeleteOne day he could even poison her out of ego and frustration that his evil wish for her as a woman with a "damaged womb" didn't come true. Don't agree to live with the enemy. Once God exposes them to you, do the needful.
DeleteTable has turned but forgiveness is the key.
ReplyDeleteHaving left him won't make her happy.
Let her use this opportunity to convince him to get babies adopted for them.
Hmm
💯💯👌
Delete*shit. If she has endured all those years it's because she loves him and living him now will not make her happy either. She can teach him that love and marriage is for better for worse.
Delete"Having left him won't make her happy"
DeleteHow do you know this? You believe there isn't a better life out there for her? Why so?
Plus, WAS SHE HAPPY WITH HIM? Uhm clearly not.
Also, he had told her he was tired of her, no?
May God help us to pick our self esteem from the gutters.
Abeg oh
ReplyDeleteI no dey like dis kind of thing! Wondering to go back where?
If na d man dey fertile he for don throw her clothes out
The one wey vex me pass na d pastor wey dem join dem beg her. Where d pastor dey when they were bullying and insulting her?
I hate wat I don't like fa
Abeg d woman no need to wonder to go baq fa
Let her decide what she want to do......
ReplyDeleteHonestly, sis. She alone can decide for herself in this predicament.
DeleteWhy all of a sudden he wants her back after knowing that he's the problem? So na the woman no get choice to leave the marriage?
ReplyDeleteNow that she is partially free from the man, it would be a great mistake to go back to him. The way he treated her despite being the problem is enough to know that he can never be supportive. She should tell them she want to have a child of her own and her husband cant make that happen. Please dont go back to your vomit.
Treat people the same way they treat you.. Do not treat people better than they deserve, that's an unhealthy relationship,. Very bad for your well-being, happiness and mental health ✌️
ReplyDeleteWord
DeleteIf your aunt find someone else, let her move on and have kids. Most men can't be there for women when they are having fertility issues.
ReplyDeleteHe already wanted her out thinking she's the cause of their TTC, but now that reverse is the case, he wants to manipulate her, he's not worth her loyalty abeg
*Larry was here*
She should never look back. He was ready to discard her because he thought she was the one with the problem.
ReplyDeleteHe was never supportive, he joined forces with his mum to humiliate and call her all sorts of demeaning names and now she’s contemplating going back? Is this love or stupidity?
Where was the pastor when mother and son were giving her hell? God knows I’ll chase them out of the house with a broom.
Out of which house? Wey she suppose don pack comot go start her life
DeleteShe should do whatever makes her happy, if she wants to go back to him and can forgive him, let her do so. I know the man is very humble now. If she does not want to return to him, she has every right to move on.
ReplyDeleteHonestly,if I am the one,I won't cover their shame.They are only calm now because the fault is from their son,assuming your aunt was the one that is infertile I am 100% sure you won't be sending this kind of chronicle.Lets be kind to one another,they won't hear,untill they are in a position that need other people's kindness and empathy.
ReplyDeleteI am so angry because I went through the worst embarrassment and insult just because I didn't conceive few months after marriage.i can't imagine what your aunt would have gone through all these years.
If she decides to stay she had better not lay with another man for conception,she should opt for IVF before they start calling her prostitute in future.it is well!
Husband and wife mata plus this kind of sensitive pikin mata, is not something that Tomas, Dickson and Harrison should talk inside. It is well with you. Even though I'm not in support of all your husband did to you but your mata is too delicate to just jump inside with 2 hands and 2 legs. God is your strength sis.🤷🏽♀️
ReplyDeleteStella has said it al.
ReplyDeleteBegging her for what?
ReplyDeleteMe I don't like people that go back beeging someone they tortured in the past. A non-supportive husband and a selfish and wicked MIL begging her not to leave. The ball is in her court but make she reason am well sha cos her hubby+his people are not loyal.
Annoying question.....what is she still doing there?
ReplyDeleteVery wicked man,just tell your sis to pray harder.
ReplyDeleteYour aunty should move on. That her husband is a very wicked man, if she was the one that is infertile he would have thrown her out and disgrace her to the whole world now the reverse is the case he wants her back to cover his shame while she might not have children in life. Can you see the selfishness of human being no love in their heart whatsoever many of them get married because they want children once is not forth coming they begin to maltreat the woman. What a life so unfair to the women folks imagine even pastors begging her to come back.
ReplyDeleteThe first thing to do is forgive him, this will help her heal. I wouldn't advice her to go back. The primary reason for the test was for the man to know if she is infantile and then throw her our if she is. She was not treated well by the man and his family. Now they are just trying to cover his shame
ReplyDeleteI'd leave if I were her.
ReplyDeleteFor the fact he wanted to throw her out of the house thinking she was the cause of their childlessness,see eh if is me nah ahead ahead o, without looking back..
ReplyDeleteBut let her decide what she wants.
The husband is wicked,he wants to use her to cover his shame.
If only he was nice to her at the onset, well since he's begging and the whole family is aware he's the one with problem, she should reconsider him.
ReplyDeleteInfact to be a woman is tiring, this kind man go still dey brag in codes say his wife is barren na just mk he dey manage as he don put head.
ReplyDeleteHmmmmmm..... Toor !!
ReplyDeleteWicked man with an even family! please poster tell your aunt to look for another husband,this one na bad market
ReplyDeleteIf I'm the one, I won't go back. Let her decide for herself.
ReplyDeleteIf you ask me..na who I go ask..
ReplyDeleteThis is dicey, if I were her, I wouldn't go back after threatening to send me packing and all the embarrassment
ReplyDeleteSigh... i am tired of nigerian "marriges". For better for worse only applies to women not men😡
ReplyDeleteShe should move out of the house abg. That her husband will still torment her hmm she never know
ReplyDeleteLet her move on with her life and hopefully she will find someone that will value her for who she is and not for what she can give him.
ReplyDeleteHer husband has shown that he is not such person, he only wants her back now because he knows he’s the one with the problem and not because he values her.
So she wants to go back to living with someone she knows doesn’t love her?
Why exactly is she even considering going back?
ReplyDeleteTo a man that violently tormented her emotionally and let his family do so, so now that he’s the problem, they are all suddenly all polite and begging her back. Wawu.
That she is thinking of going back is evidence of how far the abuse has gone!!! Abeg, there’s always something better out there!!!
Going back is just a no no no!!!! They don’t even deserve an extra second of her time.
This paragraph three gives her the reason not to go back: "He refused to go for medical checkup or even pray about the problem till one day he suddenly told her he was tired of her and wanted medical proof so he would have something to show when asked why he drove his wife away. At the hospital the doctor was able to convince him to do some fertility test."
ReplyDeleteHe was planning to drive her away, just wanted medical proof to add to whatever lies he already rehearsed. Imagine how old the woman's child or children would have been now....
Wicked people everywhere...
Your Aunty does not want her own kids? This is her opportunity to move on! Stupid and idiotic Nigerian pastors. Always begging women to accept absolutely rubbish! It’s her time to escape and have her own kids. Let her live for her this time. God has exposed the wicked!
ReplyDeleteGod has shown your aunt the kind of man she married and the kind of life she will have with him as long as she's married to him; a life of misery & unhappiness. Everything has been shown to her. If she goes back, she has chosen that life but she better don't act the victim when shit hits the fan again.
ReplyDeleteSome of you, God will expose truth & facts to you but you will still choose the suffering, then pray to the same God for 'deliverance'. Always putting your hand in fire deliberately then waiting for God to quench the fire rather than simply taking your hand out.
No need advising such women. Their self esteem is below ground level and she will go back since she's already considering it despite the absolute torture & humiliation she has endured. Continue but no disturb us later. This is her choice and she's making it with her eyes wide open.
And still have people that will look at this situation and advise the woman to stay back. For what na!!!!
DeleteHmmmmn.let her ask God for direction so that she will be sure what she is really doing.with treatment and God'mercy things will go well with them
ReplyDeleteGood riddance to bad rubbish!
ReplyDeleteYour aunt was abused and traumatized under that roof. Now husband wants her back to stave off his own shame, not because he loves her or desires her around. He wants her around for his own ego needs. If the doctor had confirmed your aunt was the infertile one, would he and his terrible mother have been as generous towards her.
ReplyDeleteYour aunt has to make her own choice. For me, I likely would not return. If your aunt is still in her fertile years then she has a good chance of still making a child with someone else and having her own children, that is if motherhood is important to her. The only thing about her current situation is the familiarity, sometimes the familiarity and finances will keep a woman in a loveless home. If she is financially stable and do not need her husband's income to survive then she is in a far better situation to move on with a hop, skip and a jump.
Kindness matters, humility matters, you can't just abuse ppl because you think you have the power to then expect them to turn around and come back. Yes, aunty can forgive him completely and hold no grudges and still move the hell on. Forgiveness doesn't mean she has to continue to remain his wife. Too much mental and emotional abuse of this innocent women then want her to play martyr.
Nigerian women don’t worship God, they worship marriage. Hope she’s careful because that man and his mum can still do something to disgrace and silence her for good. They might still be telling people she’s infertile from abortion and if they adopt people will think it’s the woman’s problem after all why would she leave and go back.
ReplyDeleteA BV saw her husband molesting her infant baby and still stayed so I’ve washed my hands off anything marriage. Hope these men become better