Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Saturday In House Gists - Loaning Money To Friends Destroys Friendships

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Saturday, March 19, 2022

Saturday In House Gists - Loaning Money To Friends Destroys Friendships

 Are you of the school of thought that loaning money to friends destroys friendship? Or do you give without looking back or caring if they pay back or not?






Have you ever loaned money to a friend and wished you never did because that act destroyed the friendship and even when money was returned the friendship took a nosedive?

Or did you loan money to your boyfriend or girlfriend or husband or wife? Did it go well?

What is your thoughts on loaning money to friends? Any good/ bad stories to back up your stand on this?

Lets gist!!!

48 comments:

  1. No, I lend monies to my cronies and this is "my school of thought;"

    Matthew 5:42Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you.

    If you my friend, asks me for money, say 100k, I assess your previous actions and temperament and give you the much I know that if you do not return, I won't be offended. I can give you between 20-60k or even the whole of it.
    And I will make it clear that even if you do not pay, there is no problem. I value true friendship than money.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I have loaned money to my (ex)boyfriend before. Couple of months later,dude started acting funny. I exed him, and the money. He tried reaching out, but naaaa. I'm over that.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The first person i gave loan to was my mother, i loaned her 50naira from my Christmas money when i was still a child, till today i haven't seen my money.

      Delete
    2. πŸ™‚ @Surrogate Mother, you no dey forget things? Well you will never get the money back, none of us did 😌

      Delete
    3. Surrogate, mine is my brother small small 1k laidat. He's sill owing till today. I just tire

      Delete
  3. I will give you money gifts instead of lending a huge amount of money to you.
    I just do not want anyone planning to eliminate me because of inability to pay debts. The days are evil.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Help people when you can but it depends on the integrity of the friend and the amount involved. A friend once loaned me 100k and I paid back within 2 months after I received my salary. What are friends for if you can't come through for them in times of need? You might be the one needing help tomorrow.

    ReplyDelete
  5. My sister loaned her friend 500k, she didn't tell me cos if she did, i would have told her no. My sis collected her contributions and since she didn't have plans for it yet, she said she will return it after using it to grow her business. Till today nothing, i don't know whether she is using jazz

    Why i say so? My sis is calling it bad debt, like how? This lady the husband just bought her the lastest iphone and a car, and you never for one day ask her? saying she is no more asking you to borrow her money again, that the 500k has ended that. Like how? If you don't need it collect it for me na... No, she is not controlling my sis, she is even the one forcing the friendship. I'm pissed...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The husband should pay biko.

      I find it disgusting when people borrow money and are so not bothered to pay back. Wicked lots

      Delete
    2. Ur sis is my hubby of before

      Delete
  6. Money wey I no fit dash person...I no go loan am o

    ReplyDelete
  7. When I was in 9ja doing nothing, my friend once borrowed me money, a huge sum. I didn't come through on when I was supposed to pay back. He left the money and traveled abroad. I repaid every dime when he borrowed me. I paid into his sisters account. Now I am in abroad and he is in 9ja doing nothing I have borrowed more than he did for me and and dashed him money on several occasion.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I choose my friends I loan money to. I dash the ones I know won't pay back what I can afford.

    I also take loan from my friends.

    ReplyDelete
  9. So long as it's for a good cause;I will give IF I truly have..

    I have always seen and take money for what it is,nothing beyond..
    A paper that is meant to solve human problems..

    If I lend from the little I have and you refuse to return,no problem..

    My prayer is God should keep blessing my hustle so I can forever keep giving from the little I see..

    Money is just printed paper,Insha Allah it will remain so to me..

    I only feel bad when there is an urgent problem for me or anyone I know and there is no much money..

    If you see me as your Mugu,fine! Life isnt too difficult

    @MARTINS

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you. For my friends, anything. I don’t even count these things. What is money after all? My friends are worth much more than that to me.

      Delete
  10. I don't loan people money that I honestly can't let go. I recently loaned 10k to a guy, not a friend per say but we are on same whatsapp group to be returned ending of January. Till now, I don't have my money and I don't know how to drag anyone for money. He came sometimes in February and told me not to be upset that he will soon return my money, till now, no show. And I won't even ask him.

    But honestly, how will u come to me next time if u need help. How?

    Another friend of mine recently told me she's trying to japa and will be needing like POF of like 30m and would need my assistance with whatever. How much am I supposed to be able to contribute to 30m. Can't be 10, 20, 30 or even 50k na. If I don't get my money back, what will I now do? There's no way it wouldn't cause a rift between us so I politely gave my excuse.

    I think friends should stop putting friends in this kind of position

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What's the full meaning of POF?

      Delete
    2. POF means proof of funds. It is used by embassies to ascertain that you can truly afford to travel to whichever country you are applying to travel to.

      Delete
    3. Just as anon 15:52 explained

      Delete
  11. My own philosophy about loaning money to friends is that always have it at the back of your mind that they might not pay back. I always go for amount I can really afford to lose in the event they don't repay the loan.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I don't have that kind of friends that I will lend money to and they won't pay back. No matter how big the money is, once I have it, I will lend it and they MUST PAY back.
    Besides, I don't have a lot of friends. We are true to each other and we have been friends for years and still counting.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly my stan and it’s both ways, if you are not really close to me, il just give you want I can let go.

      Delete
  13. That was how I lent my ‘friend’ 3k since last November. Till now she hasn’t paid back, knowing fully well corpers need to save money for the future. It’s well jare

    ReplyDelete
  14. Friends don show me shege,so I have decided that no matter how you tell your story,I will console you and give you 1 or 2k.
    I gave someone 50k since August 2019 to be paid back before December 2019,till this moment he doesn't pick my calls.The last time we spoke he told me even the Federal govt owes.

    Before this incident,I gave 19k to a tongue speaking,demon casting family friend.He promised to pay back in 2days time,this also happened in 2019.He got the money and that was the end of Solomon Grundy.He neither visits our house nor pick calls again.

    Should I also talk about the one who borrowed from me promising to pay back when his app starts working in the evening and hasn't done so till today.

    I think I am not just lucky with getting back my money so I have given up and I pray to stick to my resolve of not loaning anything above 2k,so help me God.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nobody will blame u jare. Dem don really show u shege

      Delete
  15. My boyfriend came to me on January to loan him money because he's planning to travel abroad which i politely did he told me that he wanted to put the money in his account to get his statement of account that after that he will transfer the money back to my account since today money i no see
    This tin happened since January he doesn't even call me again he is just behaving funny hmm my 350k can't just go like that

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dem don job you Aunty, wake up.

      Delete
    2. This is why I can't do this POF thing as it's not little money. I can't lose such money abeg. How much I get?

      Delete
  16. Someone I know took credit from a supplier. The manager at the supply store was a very good friend. The borrower needed the supplies to execute a contract, you know contracts pay some % as mobilization then the contractor is to get the rest, which the borrower didn’t have. So he made partial payments for some supplies, to pay up when he gets paid. Till today he has not being paid. The manager at the supplies store (his friend that gave the credit) was sacked, not sure he got another job immediately.
    Yeah, some loans can just spoil a friendship. Truth is I am not the person that will go over and beyond for a friend, I am all too aware of things going awry. I can do that with my time, not money. I treat loans as though I am a bank, if I can’t see how you will repay, I won’t give the full amount, I’ll give you what I can forget.

    ReplyDelete
  17. I borrow to honest friends and they must pay back with and some add interest when paying back..

    ReplyDelete
  18. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  19. I can only give money i can let go. No matter who you are, friend, relative, husband, I'm not giving money i can't let go of if you don't pay back. I also wouldn't do a financial assistance that would put my job in jeopardy.

    ReplyDelete
  20. I loan and people pay back
    But they take their time and I don’t like that at all. 1 month loan has become 3 years. I’m still waiting on one big one now. The guy no dey answer phone again

    ReplyDelete
  21. My senior brother tattooed on his arm if you want to loose a friend? Lend him money lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I’ve done this one on purpose so I could end a relationship. It worked

      Delete
  22. I only borrow people I know will pay back. If I know you are the type that won't pay back without me reminding you I rather dash you what I can afford.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Don’t borrow what you can’t forfeit and you won’t have problems. Shikena!!!

    ReplyDelete
  24. I don’t borrow/lend money from ANYONE and I don’t lend/ borrow anyone MONEY!

    I live by this rule and I have peace.

    ReplyDelete
  25. A salary earned will defiantly payback . I fear to lend to non salary earners

    ReplyDelete
  26. This came at the right time sef, so my best friend got married and moved away, we were childhood friends and it was hard on me because she was like the only close friend I had, so because I miss her, I was always calling every now and then to check up on her, she hardly calls but that's was okay by me. One day I called and she made a statement suggesting the reason I call often was because I was single, wow, I read meaning into it and decided to minimize the calls, she got the memo and was now doing most of the calling, but that statement was like a wake up call, it shifted something inside of me. I've never called her since hen, she now does all that calling and chatting. Its been over 6months now. Last week she called, I had my phone in my hand just looking at her call but did not pick, it rang twice, then she sent me a message on whatsapp, "babe I dey call you, call me back" I left it unread, I was going to call her the next day but it slipped me. Two days later she called and I picked, she was like I've been trying to reach you what happened, I told her I was busy, was going to reach out but forgot. She said she wants me to borrow her 100k. According to her there is this investment thingy were you get like 100% ROI,after some days and keep earning some,% afterwards, so far her husband has been doing it and it is working for him blah blah blah. the old me would have tried to talk her out of it, I just told her,i don't have that kind of money to spare and for her to be careful. I know I will never get my money back one she does not have a source of income, she help out her husband in his shop, and its not like he placed her on a salary. Two I wouldn't even have the heart to pursue my debt and my money will go like that, because I know that her investment thingy is just a matter of time

    ReplyDelete
  27. My colleague met me on Thursday to aske for 10k loan, she said she will pay back next week Wednesday, i told her i don't have up to that to spare as i have 40k in my account, 25k is a vendor's balance for a surprise package we are organizing for my mum's birthday(to be sent to her next week Friday) then the 15k is for me to hold body until salary comes.
    She then said since she plans to pay back before Friday, i should make it 30kπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
    In my mind i was like this girl thinks i am a mumu, from 10k e don jump to 30k because i said i have 40k in my akant...
    I just told her sorry i can't but i have a spare 1k note in my bag i can assist her with, she didn't even answer me
    Trying my best to avoid work place borrow borrow wahala

    ReplyDelete
  28. My mum told me that if you borrow money to a friend if he or she can't pay back that I should forget it & continue with the friendship and I know that's what she does.

    ReplyDelete
  29. The borrower is slave to the lender. If you want to keep that friendship, give, don't lend. With the way the world economy had gone the past 3 years, even those who were credit worthy may not be anymore. People who truly want to pay back don't have the means and those who would never have made a scene about money they could hitherto give away feel forced into a corner.

    If you've lent someone money and haven't gotten it back so far, just let it go and decide what you want to do with the relationship.

    Friendship is between equals. Lending tilts the scale.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Lending is not in my dictionary. I ain't giving nobody a dime. I need my peace of mind.

    ReplyDelete

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