Hmmmm....
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
ADVICE NEEDED URGENTLY
Dear bvs, I will go straight to the point.
Sometime ago, I joined a company.
I was recommended to my employer by his sister. He told me he didn't like me because of my origin, he has had awful experiences with my people. But he couldn't afford to deny his sister a favor. So I started working, but my boss was quite hostile towards me, as he refused to look at my reports, didn't pay me my allowances for overtime or any other allowances at all.
Before the job, I was broke and starving. I had an online business that was slow in yielding income. I had no savings.
So when I started the job, I could barely afford my transportation to work. Plus, the job was about 56kms away from my home, costing me over 2k on transportation alone.
I spoke with my boss if I could stay at the staff quarters till I got my first salary but he refused saying that I wasn't qualified yet.
At night he would come at my door pleading for s#x, Because he started providing for me the moment I stepped into his house, I gave in, out of gratitude.
Few months down the line, I met a gentleman, he is single and ready to settle. Even though my heart was with Mr manager at the time, I dared to start a relationship with the new man, because I want to start my own family and I'm not getting any younger, I'm 38 btw.
My new man is quite generous, he buys me things and sends money my way, he is handsome, he is religious and matured, these, I like about him.
But he is not compassionate towards me. He gets upset at the slightest, I hardly know how to please him. He takes offense at almost everything I do, even my jokes offends him, he gets irritated when I try gisting with him.
The worst part is, I can't communicate my feelings to him, I can't have a serious talk with him, he would shut me up immediately and walk away.
He swears he loves me but doesn't know how to show it. I have no reason of suspecting him of cheating, I have access to all his gadgets.
And since I began with him, I have never been with another.
I have since moved out of my manager's flat. My boss now appreciates my work and has now given me room in the staff quarters.
Mr manager has been hurting and is visibly heart broken since I left him, and I don't know what to do to help him.
I miss him so much. I want his kind of loving and not the type I'm getting.
I have thought to marry this guy and have a kid or two, then separate from him, before I die of sadness.
Secondly, how can I help Mr manager to be happy again? He sacrificed a lot for me, he fought for me, when I was alone and helpless. He never did me any wrong, but I broke his heart.
Thirdly, is their any slight chance that one can be happy and at peace in a polygamous home? Will my children ever have a place in the family?
Good day Stella.
Thanks for this platform.
Thanks for this platform.
Dear bvs, I will go straight to the point.
Sometime ago, I joined a company.
I was recommended to my employer by his sister. He told me he didn't like me because of my origin, he has had awful experiences with my people. But he couldn't afford to deny his sister a favor. So I started working, but my boss was quite hostile towards me, as he refused to look at my reports, didn't pay me my allowances for overtime or any other allowances at all.
Before the job, I was broke and starving. I had an online business that was slow in yielding income. I had no savings.
So when I started the job, I could barely afford my transportation to work. Plus, the job was about 56kms away from my home, costing me over 2k on transportation alone.
I spoke with my boss if I could stay at the staff quarters till I got my first salary but he refused saying that I wasn't qualified yet.
It was then one of our managers offered me a room in his flat.
I moved in and realized that his family are not based in Nigeria.
At night he would come at my door pleading for s#x, Because he started providing for me the moment I stepped into his house, I gave in, out of gratitude.
It was a torture at first because I didn't know him well, but I loved him as the day went by and he loved me too. Our relationship was a total bliss, he tolerated and laughed at every of my nonsense. His love for me didn't deter him from loving and providing for his wife and children, and I loved him more each day.
The relationship was beautiful.
He proposed marriage to me but I turned him down because of the problems associated with polygamy and I was concerned about his wife, she would be broken. But we continued the relationship nonetheless.
Few months down the line, I met a gentleman, he is single and ready to settle. Even though my heart was with Mr manager at the time, I dared to start a relationship with the new man, because I want to start my own family and I'm not getting any younger, I'm 38 btw.
On this grounds, I ended things with Mr manager.
Now, this is where the problem begins.
Now, this is where the problem begins.
My new man is quite generous, he buys me things and sends money my way, he is handsome, he is religious and matured, these, I like about him.
But he is not compassionate towards me. He gets upset at the slightest, I hardly know how to please him. He takes offense at almost everything I do, even my jokes offends him, he gets irritated when I try gisting with him.
He says, he prefers to see me quiet at all times. And I feel like a slave and taken for granted most of the time, I cook for him, he would eat once from it and let the rest spoil, he says he doesn't just remember the food at home. I wash his clothes and he would tell me to come back to iron them without a word of appreciation for washing it still.
The worst part is, I can't communicate my feelings to him, I can't have a serious talk with him, he would shut me up immediately and walk away.
He swears he loves me but doesn't know how to show it. I have no reason of suspecting him of cheating, I have access to all his gadgets.
And since I began with him, I have never been with another.
I have since moved out of my manager's flat. My boss now appreciates my work and has now given me room in the staff quarters.
Mr manager has been hurting and is visibly heart broken since I left him, and I don't know what to do to help him.
I miss him so much. I want his kind of loving and not the type I'm getting.
I have thought to marry this guy and have a kid or two, then separate from him, before I die of sadness.
What is the repercussions of this decision please?
Secondly, how can I help Mr manager to be happy again? He sacrificed a lot for me, he fought for me, when I was alone and helpless. He never did me any wrong, but I broke his heart.
Thirdly, is their any slight chance that one can be happy and at peace in a polygamous home? Will my children ever have a place in the family?
Please tell me what is likely to happen to me if I make any of these decisions.
*Na wah!...let me leave the BVs to advice you well because i fit slap you by mistake...
Is the audacity for me???
ReplyDeleteMost of you in broken marriages today are as a result of the way you lived your life....how do you sleep with a married man and expect to be happy when you finally settles in your own home???
I have no advice for you my Dears.
You dey mind am? And in her mind she felt like she was doing the wife a favour by not marrying her lover, meanwhile, you're steady f**cking him🙄
DeleteNa your type BV Dan-- dey like. Transactional relationship
Me I have nothing good to tell you except insults, so let me move.
Deletethe married man is not reacting because you are his option while the young man is emotionally attach to you that is why is acting that way...my sister think twice and reason well....but you smart oooo, choping two......you cant eat your cake and have it
DeleteI am laughing at this poster in witch Style, Hahahahahaha its the boldness for me. Your longer throat ll still cost you, let us bet you this onye-oshi Amu. Let another woman's husband be go and nurture your new relationshipand stop behaving like a teenager in love.
DeletePoster I like your honesty. You let it all hang out. I pray you get good advice. All I see is a young woman that wants to be loved. Some married men are hard to resist especially when you are getting older and want to settle down. I had to put my foot down to avoid the ones coming my way.
DeleteMy small advice is this, don't feel responsible for the manager's feelings. He will soon move unto the next if he hasn't already, except you have made up your mind to be in a polygamous arrangement. Also know that a polygamous arrangement will not stop him from tasting the waters elsewhere. But for the young single guy you are with, he is NOT it. He does NOT love you. Please move on. Be patient. You seem a nice, hardworking lady. You deserve better. Please update we beevees ya paddies. 😁
Don't marry Mr B. He won't give you peace and you don't want to experience that please. You haven't seen husband yet
DeleteAnon 17:55 👍👍👍👍
DeleteLeave mr A . He is married leave Mr B he doesn’t love you . Also forgot about those MR A characteristics you listed . Actions speaks louder
Delete@poater. I pity you. You will have talked about your single guy instead of bringing in sleeping with a married man in SDK blog. Sorry o.
DeleteKindly dump the two of them. See them curse the innocent lady for saying the truth. Church goers. They will have preferred she lied. Most of them are still eyeing another womans husband. Go to some offices and see what married women do, you will vomit. They even fu'k in toilets. Listen to some men and what you will hear about some married women will make you beg God to collapse the earth. Statistics has shown that most married women misbehave with reckless abandon than single girls. Watch them pimp their daughters to men. A friend told me how his girlfriend s mum sat at the door while he sleep with her daughter, keeping watch so that her husband will not catch them. Aru. Abomination.. They are still the people that adviced that last chronicle whose husband does not allow her use WhatsApp and treat her like a 5year girl to smile and keep worshiping the man as long as he is providing for her. Some even said they pray to be like her. Wonderment. Chai!!! Most women that give advice here are second wives or baby mama to married men.
I have said it repeatedly here. I once worked and lived in a married men dominated environment for years. What my eye saw, my mouth cannot say all.
Keep bringing curses upon yourself by your mouth by cursing people on Stella blog. Same thing Stella said today in her ihn memo.
Carry your horseband for head for all l care but please stop urinating everywhere when you hear about sleeping with married men. Did the man not know he was married before he asked her out?. Did he respects his marriage?. Where is his own karma?. I am so sad about most of my gender and husband matter. When will women wake up. It takes two to have sex. Why leave the man and blame only the woman always. Why?. Advice this lady and move on instead of cursing her. Godly women in happy marriages don't have curse words in their mouth. What will Christ do in this situation. Enough biko nu. Note.. I used the word..some......not all.. Before you curse me. Remember the exact words will work.for you only.
Well said Zaram
DeleteI wish I can like your comment a million times @ zaram
DeleteHow can you say you broke the heart of A MARRIED MAN? Please you have been blinded by his supposed kindness and clearly not in the right frame of mind to make straightforward decisions. And how will you like your future husband to show this kinda kindness to another young lady? Please move on from both of them. They are bad news 📰.
ReplyDeleteI wonder o @Twins squared. Broke the heart of a married man.
DeleteAll the options you presented are flawed. You cant marry your manager because he is married. Your new man is not into the relationship. He is hostile and will even be more hostile in marriage. Having a child for him and then leaving the marriage will backfire as there maybe no exit point if you marry him, you might not even be able to take your child wit you.
ReplyDeleteYou have to leave both of them and find your self a new man. You can also try to get pregnant from another man if marriage is not forth coming.
Being way from your manager is the best for both of you. What you guys have being enjoying is the sex. He has a wife and should focus on his wife.
Poster, please go with this
Delete👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿. Please listen to olomo olomo. Forget about both guys.
DeletePlease you people should stop telling people to have children out of wedlock. What kind of 'woke' and stupid trend is that???
DeleteSo you think his wife will be happy with you. No matter how you paint it you will reap what you sow.
ReplyDeletePoster, first of all, you write well.
DeleteI actually felt for you reading this.
For those in hurry to condemn her, at 38 a girl has very limited options and even much limited time. So let's be kinder.
Now to your first question; no, when you marry him what if the 2kids didn't come so fast? And if you got the two kids, what makes you think leaving him will be easy? Don't let social media divorce-mongers deceive you. It is not easy O. God forbid he turns to FFK on you, what will you do?
2nd Question; Mr Manager is not your responsibility. His kindness was not free, was it? Don't ever let him guilt-trip you or emotionally blackmail you into committing to him.
3rd Question; my step mother is happy and her children (my brothers and a sister) has good place in our family because my mother is a zero drama woman. My step mother also married my dad at 36 so she came with maturity. We are fine but this might not be your experience.
My advice: Sis, you are not a child or a "twenty-ager" so you must look your predicament in the face and make a tough decision. If you decide on the single guy you must find a way to learn his character, his soft spot (every man has one. Some melt away when you to idolized them, be on your knees, sing his praises, some it's in the sex, food and your good looks, some it's your softness and easy tears) etc and patience. Lots and lots of patience through trials and errors till you get what works. If you decide on the married man, well polygamy is legal in Nigeria but you have to go in with humility and no prejudice. Find a way of assuring the first wife that you won't be a hostile sister-wife even though I completely doubt any woman of this generation will happily welcome a co-wife unless in some Islamic families.
Both are no easy choices. Your 3rd option is to wait a little, soaking yourself in words of affirmation and expressing to God that you know He can tailor-make a perfect fit for you, He should look at your current dilemma and have mercy on you.
I wish you all the best.
@ Ms Sapphire, your advice most times baffles me. At your second paragraph, would you say that if your husband was the married man in question?
DeleteMs. Sapphire you are always on point!!!
DeletePoster weigh your options carefully and dont destroy your future whichever you go with.
Ms. Saphire, you got that right! I actually enjoyed reading through her chronicle. It felt like I was reading a Non-Fiction Novel. Poster Pls, incline to Ms.Saphire's Advice as they're filled with wisdom.
DeleteGood luck.
18.53 good question, help me ask her ooo.
DeleteThank you ms sapphire
Delete@sapphire..I love u...if urhusband was the manager will u still advice same...be honest
DeleteHe gets irritated when you try gisting with him? Can't blame him. This your gist irritates me.
ReplyDeleteLoL 😂😂😂😂
DeleteShe is most foolish 38 year old on earth. Kmt
DeleteLol
DeleteMe too, very irritating gist🤣🤣🤣.
Delete@Gifty, dont say she is the most foolish 38 years old you have seen, nobody knows it all and you are not in her shoes, she has made her mistakes out of desperation, advise her and move on, if she had answer to what is disturbing her, she wont come here, we should understand that it is difficult for those in the valley when we are on the mountain top and shouting. It is difficult for women at 38 but not an excuse to act inappropriate but hey who are we to judge her as she wears the shoe. Please poster leave both and look unto next opportunity it is never late, Rita Dominic have shown that.
DeleteWell said, @16.42
DeleteYour new man is ur karma.
ReplyDeleteBut I will advise you to leave that new man and also don’t go back to ur manager. The harm you’ve done is enough.
DeleteYou are right.
All good gifts come from God. Leave that married man alone, break up with that single guy. Make restitution first, your man will come, nothing God can't do.
Nawa!!!
ReplyDeleteOmo!!!1!!1
What did I just read?
Is this a movie script or what?
Things they occur.
And for an advice, the only one I have is: seek the face of God, please.
Please let your manager be he is a married man and he will definitely get better with time. I sense a lot of emotional and psychological abuse coming from the single guy. Don't jump into marriage because you feel age is not on your side.
ReplyDeleteIt is so sad to know that people just live as if there is no God. You cannot even fathom that you are already receiving a stark rebuke for coming between a man and his wife and that meant an effrontery to God who instituted marriage. You put asunder what God joined together and you are talking about "love.?" NO it is LUST. yOU LUSTED after another woman's husband. You shouldn't have lived in that house the moment you knew he was married. Repent of this and call upon God and see that your situation changes.
ReplyDeleteAnon 15.24, she didn't put any asunder anywhere biko. Wife is abroad and left her husband to burn jare.
Delete19.32 stop justifying nonsense biko. Wherever the wife is, is irrelevant, he remains a married man. Eod.
DeleteLolz
ReplyDeleteInteresting read and mature at switching men which only comes with age.
But you started hurting Mr. Manager's wife right from the moment you accepted his advances and repaying his kindness with sex.
Now it is better to discuss your concerns (dont tell him about Mr. Single and uptight) with Mr. Manager and make solid plans for your unborn babies then work on becoming his naija based wife than for you to become a log of wood with mr. Single and uptight. No happiness with mr. Single and uptight and please don't drag your babies through the unpleasant mud of DV.
I for say make you wait but being a second or 3rd wife or more is a cultural thingy but you must be sure about not creating a mess of the chance. What is life without happiness again?
So if you have a chance with manager, you go and continue in your iniquity?
ReplyDeleteWhat a shame!
You are the one wrecking your chances in life.
Polygamy is a big NO NO, I'm from a polygamous home and even if we're "peaceful" with each other, I still would not advise any woman to go into it, besides in my opinion, you owe Mr. Manager ABSOLUTELY nothing. To be blunt, you paid your debts with your body; let him be but be respectful and deligent in your official duties.
ReplyDeleteSecondly, Mr. Boyfriend's situation seem like a Master/servant relationship o. Commands, lack of appreciation, no fun/gisting times, Ha! Honestly, I'll advice if you're desperate and feel time isnt on your side, then go ahead, marry, have your babies and if he coninues with his behaviour, then divorce him and be with your babies OR better still remain single and be patient but NEVER become second wife.
Thirldy, you can't make anyone happy, you're not ice creame 🍦.
You're not responsible for Mr. Manager's happiness; again, face front, do your work, be respectful.
It was a transactional realtionship and you played your path deligently.
Finally, please give your self a dirty wakeup slap on my behalf so that "love" can clear from your eyes.
All the best.
That first one was neither a relationship nor love, it was pure lust.
ReplyDeleteThe second one is doomed because of your role in the first.
Seek God.
It is very hard to advise you
ReplyDeleteThe ‘kindness’ from your manager was his reward for you servicing him in bed. I’m not being harsh, a married man can never be heartbroken over you. He has his wife to keep him company. Never EVER believe a married man. If he can lie to his wife then who are you?
ReplyDeleteThe second man - your instinct is telling you that you are not compatible.
High time you keep this married man this, married man that behind you! Married men abandon their wives for another woman if you don’t know
Delete16:46, they don't know. My cousin's husband of 6 years left her for another woman.
DeleteLmao 16:46. Are you a side chic?
DeleteAnon 16.46 and Castle replying to my comment. The fact is that he has NOT left his wife for her and is still ‘acting’ heartbroken. He has his wife at night to get him through the fake heartbreak 😂.
DeleteAnyway, when the mistress becomes the wife, she creates a vacancy.
I won’t advise her to become a wife to a married man. Everyone knows it isn’t worth it so let’s be honest.
Poster please calm down,you sound desperate,leave your manager alone,he belongs to another woman.
ReplyDeleteThat other guy is not worth it,leave him and have peace.
Your own man will come by God's grace.
We always have a choice sha. You chose your job and still do and always will. That's why you didn't mind sleeping with a married man to keep it.
ReplyDeleteAnd because as a human, our wants are insatiable, you now want a family and Mr Manager has served his purpose in granting you that stability you needed for a stable job. (Kudos to him for that.) But because Karma is such a whore and her ashawoism knows no morals, she has visited you with an emotionally detached man and intends to grant you a blissful marriage with that man...making you an offer you can't refuse...she's basically saying, "Marry this man and be sad forever or marry Mr Manager and expect wife #3 to throw you out as you're about to throw out wife #1"..and since you don't even mind bringing in kids into this selfish "damn the world, I love my job" shit you gat going, abeg leave me jare.
Imagine the question, what's likely to happen to me", we're soothsayers na...yeye girl.
Polygamy is a curse. please don't go into it. do not put asunder what God has joined together
ReplyDeleteIt’s not a curse Abeg
DeleteYou want to have kids with another woman's husband? Are you kidding me?
ReplyDeleteAnd you want your own marriage to be blissful?
A person reaps what she sows; Galatians 6:7
Call upon God to forgive you and give you "family of your own" See Exodus 1 about
those women that feared God.
And read the bible about all the dudes who authored the good books. Ruth even married a married man
DeleteRuth did NOT marry a married man, please stop twisting the Scriptures to suit your selfish desires
DeleteRuth did NOT marry a married man Oooo lol
DeleteLeave someone's husband alone! You can't be happy while you're hurting a fellow woman like you indirectly. Mr. Manager will be fine!
ReplyDeleteWhy are you still with someone that doesn't give you peace? Leave both of them, ask God for forgiveness and start afresh. Just trust Him completely this time around to bless you with your own man. It's very possible if only you will believe. I wish you well.
Buhahahahahahaha. Awwwwhhh somehow you sound sweet innocent and naive..But you are to some extent.
ReplyDeleteDrop Mr single like it's hot, quit every washing and cooking you are doing.
He's damaged, looking for who to mess up her life.
As for Mr Married man, don't ever get pregnant by him.
He will disappear ooh. Na so dem deh behave till you carry belle.
Tell him to settle you well so that even if you decide to get pregnant and he disappears, you are financially covered to cater for your baby and yourself.
To settle her well as what? No be for thesame place dem dey work? I am sure his wife supports his Naija bill sef. You better dont give out yeye advise, you never can tell how naive some people think, what if she decides to take this evil advice??
Delete"His love for me didn't deter him from loving and providing for his wife and children, and I loved him more each day. He proposed marriage to me but I turned him down because of the problems associated with polygamy and I was concerned about his wife, she would be broken." what's this bikonu?
ReplyDeletewhat do you mean repay his kindness to you? You hv done that already wen you gave him sex in return for accommodation now pls kindly cut ties with those two and go get urself ur own man!! Goodluck
Your Suffer has only started,The day,moment You decided to open your legs for a Married was the day your Wahala began.
ReplyDeleteStory! Which wahala! you women never learn continue carrying husband on the head! karma no they reach una dirty husband nah only the lady involved 😂😂😂
DeleteP.s I am happily married but I have noticed married women don’t like truth
Tell me about Ruth in The Bible's wahala and how it began? Boaz was a married man and so was David the adulterer and murderer.
DeleteOyinbo with tiny penis impose dia monogamous culture upon una
So being monogamous or polygamous is now a function of the size of the penis? 😂😂😂😂😂😂
DeleteIt’s more than culture sha. Most of us would rather have our man to ourselves. I don’t want to share
Delete19.36 trying so hard to justify adultery. Newsflash - it is a sin and always will be. FYI Boaz was not a married man. 2. David was punished for his sins.
DeleteLeave the both of them alone jare
ReplyDeleteDem no dey catch late comer for husband house.
ReplyDeleteI know age is not by ur side but always have it at d baq of ur mind dat IT IS NOT HOW FAST BUT HOW WELL
So far, the 70% of ladies i know dat married late enjoy their homes...
The best thing is to forget about this ur new man in oda to avoid another CHRONICLES OF BLOG VISITOR in the next few months.
Also, using sex to pay back ur manager is a capital NO. To me oh, for that area you no try. Honestly u nearly made me to say no wonder ur employer no like people from ur ORIGIN.
God will give u a man dat will give u peace of mind!!!.
Let me give you big slap that Stella did not give you. Are you normal? Just sit down and read what wrote again. LEAVE BOTH MEN AND FACE FRONT! I don't want to insult you but you are honest about your situation and that is the first step to start all over again. Your husband is waiting for you move on.
ReplyDeleteMarry mr b and continue sleeping with A
ReplyDeleteI won't judge you because none of us is perfect. Truth is, none of this relationships are perfect for you. Move on and start afresh.
ReplyDeleteTrue, neither are ideal situations for the poster. Neither brings peace of mind.
DeleteMumu girl. You think the manager will really marry you? He just said it to tie you to him. You slept with another woman's husband and pretending to bring in polygamy. You will reap what you sow. Nonsense at your age. Instead of you to be seeking God's face for your own husband you are still sleeping with men.
ReplyDeleteIf you can have small sense like a mustard seed run from both men and wait for your own husband.
Ask God for forgiveness and move on.
Your husband is doing/will do same if he gets the opportunity rest
Delete@anon 18:05, your statement is harsh, but true. Some of these women flaunting their supposed faithful husbands if they only knew that it is because of us singles rejected their asses and sent them home why they have the life they think they do. It is only because they didn't get opportunity to cheat why they didn't, it sure was not for a lack of trying.
DeleteI have turned down every married and involved men that came my way, and they all had a story to tell about their woman. It is disgusting to hear how some of them talk about their wives and you know it is all lies just to get someone else. And those are the ones who will even acknowledge being married, there is a whole other set that denies the existence of their family, those are the lowest of the low, not even their children they will speak of. Scums!!!
19:52 you are right. From the i love her but she can’t have kids or she doesn’t like sex. All sorts of sad tales married men tell. I do pity
DeleteWell said 17.26
Delete18.05 you should rest too.
Broke a married man's heart?
ReplyDeleteHow?
How do you want to help him?
Help his wife instead by leaving her husband. You want to go back and give him breakup/consolation sex right?
Leave the other weyrey and look for somebody better to marry.
Poster you can settle for the married man if you want, being a second wife is not a crime. Make sure he marries you, make money, save money and be prepared for the worst. Men can shock you wether single or married
ReplyDeleteMadam poster, what were you excepting when you moved into a married man’s house? Ice cream? Acting like you are naive. I put it to you, you knew what you were doing when you moved into Mr Married man’s house. You don’t care about your fellow woman’s happiness just your selfish self regardless of who you hurt.
ReplyDeleteYou must me feeling really special because you believe you broke Mr married man’s heart. If you like go ahead and accept his proposal, you will reap what you sow. As for the single guy you are with, you haven’t seen anything yet, your karma just started!
Poster, I would have advised you to go for the married man if he was rich but he's not. Look polygamy without good money to be comforting you is wahala, please move on. As for your current man, that guy is damaged find a way to discard him.
ReplyDeleteEmotionally, the manager is a better fit for you. If he is serious about marriage then you would need to speak with his wife before you could proceed. See her beliefs on polygamy, some women don't care at all as long as they and their children are provided for. Maybe she has her own thing going on in the abroad and may even want out of the marriage, who knows. If your only concern is your aging eggs and having a child then being a second wife may be the avenue that brings that about. If you really care about the current wife's feelings then speak to her, see if she gives you the blessings to marry as a second wife and if so then that may be the better route for you.
ReplyDeleteNo woman is able to live as a figurine just there showing and cannot speak. Your present guy wants an ideal that is impossible. If the sound of your voice irritates him and he wants very little conversation and you are a big conversationalist, then you are unequally yoked, he would be better off dating a mute woman who cannot speak and will never speak. People like him make me afraid because you have to constantly be walking on eggshells, you will never be free. Not even to make children would I go there, babies cry constantly and some are even colicky and they cry nonstop. How would he deal with the crying of babies and the noisiness of toddlers if he cannot even handle an adult conversation with you. Seems like that is trouble waiting to happen. Those are not ppl whose DNA you help to propagate, let him and his desire for stillness be.
The guy is emotionally abusive. This is very bad because he is deliberately eroding her self esteem and removing her happiness. He enjoys her pain and taking her down. This can graduate in marriage to physical abuse. Poster you are seeing the signs now. Don't start what you can't finish.
DeletePoster forgive yourself first for your decisions earlier but from this story, personally I would not advise pursuing anything with any of the men in this picture. Mr married man is only a user who took advantage of your situation to exploit you sexually. As much as possible, try to avoid "quid pro quo" situations in the work place and even in life generally if you can. The Mr B, hmmmm he will run your enemy emotionally and mentally unstable that your enemy will complain but people will say your enemy is the one with the problem. Please avoid him like a bad habit. Kindly pray to God for forgiveness, mercy and let him grant you his desire for you.
DeleteLol, the new guy is a walking karma. You kept fucking manager till you got to 38. He won't marry o, forget that gist, na scope. You will warm his bed till you enter 40... Then u start running kiti kiti kata kata from MFM to cele, binding nonexistent spiritual husband.
ReplyDeletePolygamy is part of our culture, I see nothing wrong in becoming a 2nd wife. From what you said up there I think you are more carried away with Mr. B’s money and generosity
ReplyDeleteHappiness should be your number one priority follow your heart poster. Even in the Bible, our so-called men of God married more than one wife. Age is no longer on your side, use your head, and is it well.
Please keep the Bible out of your nonsense. Y'all won't read where it says flee fornication and God will judge the adulterer.
DeletePoster you sound innocent amd honest too.
ReplyDeleteWell transactional sex/relationship is what you had with Mr manager and if you don't want to be in a polygamy arrangement it's very OK. Don't judge yourself.
As for that Mr Single boyfriend eh? He is bad news. If you marry him get ready for premium tears, don't marry out of desperation, o know you are looking at your age, biological clock and all that, but dont do it.
Look forward and you will meet someone good enough.