Hilarious to the last dot...
How una dey?
Stellathumbulina...how the terrain? I hail O!
Na inside market we dey, wey three women begin do drama!
Na wetin hapun, this early morning?
I never see who go give me gist, na so I near the third woman shed. Na Agbo she dey sell.
Na im I ask her, if she get wetin person fit cure wetin nor do me! I say market slow one kain. How we go do am?!
She say if market slow, na me cause am Na! She say she wan show me road but I must to close mouth! Mouth? Ordinary Mouth?! Nor worry!
I say no problem. Na im she carry me go one man wey be her uncle. The man ring Sekere for my ear sotehh, my ear block!
The smoke wey dem blow sef don dey make eye pepper person! *Hian! Problem!*
The man after 20mins begin ask me wetin I come for?! Isi gini?!
After all the sekere, una never see wetin dey do person?! Hian! Una service provider nor get conscience o!
I say this man suppose see my mind as I come, Why he begin dey still ask me question?!
Na im I say market no sell, I be wan know Why?
He say he nor be herbalist, say he be spiritualist!
I say me sef see am! As anor see pot and the head of cow wey don commit!
Na im he give me list of wetin to buy come! Be like him eye nor too clear, to see who dey terrorise my market?!
As I look the list, Nna ehn, I don gather idea for the kain soup wey dey hungry this man!
Na im I comot, do tanda aside, wey my agbo friend remain inside. I put ear for door, hear as both of them dey laff... I don understand the matter! They nor know say crase dey do apprenticeship for my side!
She nor know say my antenna get reason why e dey ontop my neighbour window! Nor be say space nor dey for my window! E get why! *clickstongue!*
I enter market, buy everything wey dey the list.
I see my Agbo friend for road, she wink me! Say make anor forget to put better money for envelope when I wan go deliver the items. I wink am back, say make she nor worry 'agatdis!'
I enter yard put my condiments for fire, cook better yoruba vegetable soup with snail and oporoko, na im I lem with better Garri! *God abeg!
I don peel the yam wah go use do porridge for evening.
I carry myself begin collect breeze outside, na im my herbalist neighbour come waka pass! *He don go destroy another person destiny for backyard!*
He greet me, I greet am! I say Baba abeg o, Se Ugwu and Goatmeat, periwinkle and snail plus Ponmo and oporoko follow for juju to sabi wetin dey reduce customer for market?!
Na inside market we dey, wey three women begin do drama!
Na wetin hapun, this early morning?
I never see who go give me gist, na so I near the third woman shed. Na Agbo she dey sell.
Na im I ask her, if she get wetin person fit cure wetin nor do me! I say market slow one kain. How we go do am?!
She say if market slow, na me cause am Na! She say she wan show me road but I must to close mouth! Mouth? Ordinary Mouth?! Nor worry!
I say no problem. Na im she carry me go one man wey be her uncle. The man ring Sekere for my ear sotehh, my ear block!
The smoke wey dem blow sef don dey make eye pepper person! *Hian! Problem!*
The man after 20mins begin ask me wetin I come for?! Isi gini?!
After all the sekere, una never see wetin dey do person?! Hian! Una service provider nor get conscience o!
I say this man suppose see my mind as I come, Why he begin dey still ask me question?!
Na im I say market no sell, I be wan know Why?
He say he nor be herbalist, say he be spiritualist!
I say me sef see am! As anor see pot and the head of cow wey don commit!
Na im he give me list of wetin to buy come! Be like him eye nor too clear, to see who dey terrorise my market?!
As I look the list, Nna ehn, I don gather idea for the kain soup wey dey hungry this man!
Na im I comot, do tanda aside, wey my agbo friend remain inside. I put ear for door, hear as both of them dey laff... I don understand the matter! They nor know say crase dey do apprenticeship for my side!
She nor know say my antenna get reason why e dey ontop my neighbour window! Nor be say space nor dey for my window! E get why! *clickstongue!*
I enter market, buy everything wey dey the list.
I see my Agbo friend for road, she wink me! Say make anor forget to put better money for envelope when I wan go deliver the items. I wink am back, say make she nor worry 'agatdis!'
I enter yard put my condiments for fire, cook better yoruba vegetable soup with snail and oporoko, na im I lem with better Garri! *God abeg!
I don peel the yam wah go use do porridge for evening.
I carry myself begin collect breeze outside, na im my herbalist neighbour come waka pass! *He don go destroy another person destiny for backyard!*
He greet me, I greet am! I say Baba abeg o, Se Ugwu and Goatmeat, periwinkle and snail plus Ponmo and oporoko follow for juju to sabi wetin dey reduce customer for market?!
Me wey sabi say na money matter dey worry customers, wey turn market to embassy!
Baba say 'No forget to join Iru o'!
Choi! I talk am! Even though this Baba get bad character, e nor dey ever mize truth!
I carry toothpick hang for mouth, stroll enter market.
My agbo friend don enter battle with those 2women wah see the other day! The main reason wah go chook eye, where person no send me!
Na so dem loud wetin dem dey try hide before e! Choi, na so I quick stretch my 5G ear to download the condiment!
The first one husband, dey expect container wey carry contraband, and she no want make dem confiscate the thing!
The Agbo woman carry her go the same uncle wey come knack the woman front, back and center, chop her money well well! *E full plate nor be small* He even carry STD souvenir give her!
Now container don land, they don seize am for wetin dey inside! The First woman begin vibrate say her husband don dey under arrest!
The second one say her husband wan marry him barber younger sister. The uncle bill her and knack her join! *Daylight robbery!*
The thing wey he give her to rub for body to attract the husband, begin smell like dead rat!
Husband quick suspect say she get agenda, he don comot go lodge for hotel pass 2months Na! He nor gree go house!
So wetin be the level?! I don laff taya, God abeg!
My agbo friend say make dem do the matter hush hush! For where?! The two women comot wig and wrapper, sidin ontop the Agbo woman!
They bastardize her West wey be say, na wheelchair and leggings she go wear for a very long time, As na oversize leggings dey kukuma fit POP! *clickstongue!*
She begin use corner eye look me, she dey wait to see if I go join unleash the Dragon! I help her find keke wey go deposit her for Hospital! She wan begin apologise give me.*Hian!*
I say wetin?! Me anor be victim, na me send my eye go see wetin dey hungry am! Na witness I be!' Na escourtion I follow go! If your Uncle na legit, he for don see my mind say I get motive!
I say, If you follow me go house, I for turn small Garri give you, make you sef lem, with the soup wey your uncle 'prescribe' give me! As Fitfam chief chef wey him be! *clickstongue!*
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
Sisi, na correct gist you de carry come for dis we yard🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
ReplyDeleteHahahaha hahahaha Lagos spiritualists don jam.
DeleteDon't I like this Sisi.
My belle o hahahaahahhahahahahhahahhahahajkikikikihahahaha
One can imagine wetin some women dey put themselves into. Person open leg kolet STDs
Hahaha 🤣🤣😂😂
Delete🤣🤣🤣laf wan kee me.
ReplyDeleteBut Sisi you took a risk o,What if your agbo friend took you to a dangerous place nkor..Abeg o.
Hahahahahaha spiritualist weh no see say you no normal
ReplyDeleteIs that one a spiritualist 😂🤣
DeleteLMAO.....too much sense won't kill this writer
ReplyDelete🤣🤣🤣🤣Fitfam chief Chef...
ReplyDeleteI was laughing gently (abi how I go call am), until I got to, "Fitfam Chief chef". Kai God! 🤣🤣 Person tongue fit twist in the course of pronouncing it - Fitfam Chief chef
ReplyDelete😂😂😂😂😂 you be correct aproko
ReplyDelete🤣🤣🤣 Sisi your head dey touch I swear 🤣🤣
ReplyDeleteSisi see as you make me dey clicktonge with you😂🤣🤣🤣🤣 todey torey wear kion kion shoe
ReplyDelete'agatdis' 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
ReplyDeleteEwoooo, if every body dey like you,false prophets and spiritualist no go see food chop.
Hunger dey we land ooo..spiritualist na scammer but com jam pesin wey pass am.
ReplyDeleteYou carry your antenna put for your neighbor window. You be complete amebo promax😅😅😅😅😅
ReplyDeleteThis gist too sweet ooo. Abeg Sisi next time, no follow person go that kind place again make them no carry you go where you no know ooo!!
ReplyDeleteD man for kukuma talk say e dy hungry 🤣🤣
ReplyDelete😂😂😂 I like you already any body wey be your friend no geh worry atol na comedy you go dey give them steady 😂😂 'agatdis'
ReplyDeleteChoi choo, sisi have filled my stomach with laugh sense master na you be😭😭😭😭
ReplyDeleteHahahahahaha. So funny
ReplyDelete😅😅😅😅😅😅😅😅 very funny
ReplyDelete🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
ReplyDeleteThere is a serious hunger and everybody is hustling just to make ends meet and put food on the table.... If you are very observant you would have noticed that there are no more sacrifices kept on the road/highway unlike before where some junction are flooded with delicious and yummy meat, chicken, chivita, five alive etc in the name of sacrifice..things are hard in this bubu regime oboy nomore sacrifice on our highway even the chief priests are not smiling because they are not seeing enough customers... I can't believe Some women collected wotowoto for bed, paid huge sum of money after the bedmantics when they had already known their husbands were involved in a shady business.
ReplyDeleteCrazy things are really happening...... This country has gradually slipped into comatose.. Everyone is hustling trying to make ends make ends meet.. There is no food for the chief priest in the forest anymore.. The chiefpriest are not smiling at all. Hahaha! If you're
ReplyDeletevery observant you would have observed that there are less sacrifices on our highway/main road unlike before when the main road and junctions were flooded with delicious meat, yugurt, chivita, five alive among others in the name of sacrifice... Buhari Regime has dealt them a dirty blow.
Sisi of life. You show Dem correct sense.
ReplyDeleteMy landlord for ogun state university na babalawo. Everyday the man wife dey slaughter chicken cook and sometimes dem dey slaughter goat. Na so so Lagos number plate car dey can find the man come. Babalawo dey live large
ReplyDeleteSisi e be like your leming frequency na the same with your amobo own o😁
ReplyDelete