JAPA CHRONICLES....

This is such an Interesting read.....

 

''This would be a long read but I hope its worth it......

Somehow before that fateful 20th October, 2020 toll gate incident, Hubby and I had been talking back and forth about relocating but nothing concrete. After that horrible event that I regrettably watched the live videos, the very next day, I told my hubby we are leaving this country, I cannot imagine raising my kids here. (call it an emotional outburst)

So we decided to try Canada, our educational qualifications and work experiences showed we would have good points to apply for PR. So we said let's start preparing for IELTS, then we seriously started praying about it too.

One blessed evening, Hubby was scrolling across Twitter when he saw an open position that he thought was good for a junior colleague of his, so he forwarded to her. Next day, he came back from the office to say he read the offer link better and there was also a role for him but it was in Germany (I shared the testimony here)

I said "Oga, apply".

To try and shorten this as much as I can, they both got the position and he had a huge reluctance on taking the role cos our marriage was young and he didn't want to be apart.

I was like "Alaye, please go".

From all indications, we couldn't go together (I sent Stella a mail privately also and she said same). We asked embassy and embassy said minimum of 8 months to get an appointment date!
We both concluded that 8 months wasn't too much.. So off he went.

About 2-3 months after, On one of those lonely, terrible nights of missing him, I went online and searched how long it would take to relocate to join him, that's how I saw that in reality, it was a minimum of 1 year to get a date for appointment (family reunion Visa is what Germany calls it), then you have a month difference from when you get the mail to when you will actually present yourself at the embassy, after which a lawyer will verify all documents presented, from all academic documents to marriage certificate (this stage has no time limit, its according to how breeze blow the lawyer) and then your spouse is also verified in Germany (highly dependent on how fast his city immigration office works), if successful then your visa would be approved and you will be asked to send your passport for stamping.

I couldn't sleep that night, I read and consumed as many stories as I could, saw many people waiting with no sign of success for years, some will get to the lawyer verification stage or any other stage and then dead silence! 2 years to 3 years sometimes for people to finally join their families again.

"What have we gotten ourselves into?" I wondered. I sent as many screenshots as I could to hubby all through the night. Our conversation the next morning was so sad, especially from my end, but hubby kept saying "I trust God, it won't take that long".

I told him to please come home for Christmas as I was missing him too much and it would drive me crazy if I had to wait 2- 3 years, so he bought a ticket to come visit for Christmas (by Christmas when he would come, It would have made it 6 months he relocated).

However, I want people to learn from here. Through my vast and consuming reading, I discovered that there were some people who were exempted from the long wait, masters students under a certain scholarship (unfortunately, this doesn't work anymore now). But my husband was not on a scholarship, he wasn't a student, he was working, so that didn't look like it would work or so I thought.

THE MIRACLE

He later got his residence permit which was one of the major documents he needed to file for me, so I told him of the exemption I noticed, I sent a mail to one of the people i saw that benefited from the exemption and I asked her to please tell me what the scholarship does to aid them faster. She said they usually gave them a letter to take to the embassy, I asked to please show what the letter looked like, she didn't show me (for obvious reasons) but she was gracious enough to tell me what the content was.

So my husband approached his boss, the boss had asked him to let them know whatever he needed to settle in nicely, he would always say "I just want my wife here" but prior he didn't have a residence permit yet so they couldn't really help.

When he finally did, he told them and then also told them of the exemption I had read about. The HR was gracious enough to follow that format the kind woman gave me, and he addressed a letter to the embassy using the company's letterhead.

My husband got his residence permit on a Thursday, had the conversation with his boss and HR on Friday, mailed the embassy that same Friday(the guy no fit chill! Lol) and the following Monday I got a mail from the embassy to get prepared for an interview the following month! I nearly fainted when I saw the mail at work, Ehn! Hooooooooooooow?!!!!

THE OUTSTANDING MIRACLE

A month later, hubby was in Nigeria for the holidays as planned, he arrived a day before I was scheduled to go to the Embassy. I saw him at his hotel and hugged him excitedly, hoping to start knacking ASAP..(lol)..He was just asking if i brought all the documents the embassy requested, i should bring it out from my bag and let's reconfirm, so if there was anything missing, we could still go fix it that night.

After he confirmed everything was set, he now had my time (winks). Next morning, I woke up sick, body temperature hot, I was throwing up, maybe it was nerves, I don't know. (Hubby sprained his leg badly some days prior to his interview too, he went to his Work visa interview with a limp, maybe na village people or na devil, i no know, but God pass satan!)

When I got to the Embassy, the guy at the entrance told me how to arrange my documents, i told him of the letter my husband's workplace wrote. He said "It is an extra document, you only give if they ask you if you have any other document to present".
The interviewer was nasty, specifically said she didn't like those of us that came to apply for family reunion visas, and complained about my passport photographs that the machine wasn't seeing it.

After all the questions, she said "I am done, you can go". I didn't move immediately because I was expecting her to ask for other documents. She then asked "Is there anything else?" I brought out the letter. She asked why I didn't include it in the others I had presented, I repeated what the man at the gate had told me, she said "Well, maybe its because I don't need it".

By this time, I had brought out the letter from my file, maybe she saw the letterhead or not,I don't know but she changed her mind and asked me to hand it over with an extra copy if I had. I did and then I left.
I was so upset when I got outside cos the woman was really rude to me. Hubby apologised and said he knew i remained calm because of him. (On a normal day, he sabi hin wife! Lol!)

This was about some days to Christmas. Ladies and gentlemen, very first week of January, I got a mail asking me to send in my passport for stamping! Hubby had not even gone back yet, I still remember hubby's laughter as he read the mail. Got my passport back the next week and na so me wey never reach Seme border use Schengen visa deflower my Passport o.

His workplace had written that they would want me to join him in January and the embassy complied.
2-3 years process was less than 3 weeks for me. I didn't go through all the verification process. (I am sure of this cos my city immigration office told me when i was registering after I arrived and they wanted to confirm my marriage certificate)

Hubby's faith really helped us through the process and it was rewarded! 

God is good! My family and his family sef enter serious prayer and God heard us.

At this point, I would like to say a lot of people reached out to me through that platform after seeing how fast I got mine, some also tried this method, it worked for some and for others, it didn't. Recently, people say it doesn't work at all anymore but I am an advocate of "Try!" (las las, you might get a No, but what if you get a Yes?

SETTLING IN AND HOW IT HAS BEEN SO FAR.

Let me put this under subsections, maybe it will help to shorten it.

WEATHER: Landed in Frankfurt the next month (I had to resign at work and do a one month notice) hubby had told me many times that it was cold. I carried jacket but while waiting for him in the airport, I was thinking, its not that bad na. He arrived and we made our way to the trains, that's when the cold hit me!! I screamed "Give me gloves, give me gloves!". Its like blood stopped flowing in my hands and that was how it was for me till March/April and then July/August, one wonderful heat started and I was wondering if I was in the same country that nearly froze me some months back.

I have had my first winter now and somehow I don't feel as cold as I even felt when I came in. Maybe its because I have bought enough thermo leggings and layer up like crazy… In winter, fashion is not the main issue, warmth is. (look like craze person, if e go keep you warm)

INTEGRATING: Language barrier can make you look very foolish, so hubby had learnt a little Deutsch before coming and picked up some more from the months spent before I came. But I came in with zero knowledge (please avoid this if you can). Usually, I should have had at least an A1 level of the language. It is a requirement for a family reunion visa, but as i be miracle-child na.. I didn't.

Hubby was my translator for some time, and when he wasn't there, I spoke English to those who could understand. However, luckily for me, the immigration department was able to get a slot for me 2 weeks after I arrived to begin an integration course which included learning the language. I remember my first day in class (Es war sehr peinlich), they taught in Deutsch cos we were a class full of immigrants from many other countries and languages ,so Deutsch was our common ground.

Oh.. I don't think I have ever looked that foolish in my life. No clue, no idea, Everything sounded like radio static. I went to buy the books for kindergarten and began to teach myself and do lots of extra reading. One year later, (with a lot of school holidays in between) I have my B1 (I had a 100% in speaking, listening and reading). My teachers always remember my first weeks in class and they would always say how much they are proud of me. Hubby never stops boasting of his wife that had no clue when she came and now speaks better than him.

MAKING FRIENDS

This is a cold country, literally (except in summer) and figuratively. I am a very social person, it didn't take long for me to start missing home.
My church community back home was a strong part of my life. When we got here, we started attending the branch of my church here (I attend a church that is worldwide) but the language was still a barrier. I was almost giving up on going to church when I could literally understand nothing. (Although we had a woman from Jamaica who usually translated to English for us but when she didn't come….). And gbam! A pastor was transferred here and guess what? We began an English group about 2 months after I came…
I have met wonderful people that have become sisters and brothers. An absolute blessing to me! Through helping out one of them with a need, I have gotten a part-time position with a certifying body.

I was also at first the only black in my language class, then later a lady from Kenya joined us and we are inseparable now.
I also met a woman through hubby's barber and because she has lived here a long time ere, she knows all the cheap stores and where to get naija food. Absolutely lovely woman!

Be intentional about making friends when you relocate, you will always need people in your circle! Be kind and you will attract good and kind people! But in your kindness, stay wise.

SURVIVAL

A huge part of my survival is dependent on hubby and because he is well paid. He can cover rent, feeding, transport, pay for schooling (although it was discounted but what was left is still a lot) for both of us without him being totally drained.

That is why I can go to language school without having to work and still be okay. So i guess my first point is if you are relocating as a couple, relocate only with a kind person, there is no mercy on the streets here oooo… Being with a kind partner is key!

Coming to a country with a language barrier and a need to survive without help can be stressful. You will not have access to good jobs when you don't understand the language and the menial jobs will tell on your body. Except if you have been employed before coming, or coming to study, please have a basic knowledge of the language before coming to Germany. Now that I have a B1, I have access to jobs that will at least help me survive if I came alone; however , I haven't started a full time job yet, currently sleeping on Linkedin and other job portals. But all of this na based on say hubby has a good job o, if it wasn't I would have jejely done many of the other jobs readily available (Stella, bitte stellen Sie mich ein. Lol…)

We don't have kids yet(please pray for us that we will soon) and this has also helped, in terms of managing resources and survival. Coming with kids here should be well planned, kids can't get into school until 6 years and the free kindergarten is sometimes till 2pm(although schooling is different in each state in Germany). So in a situation where you both need to work to survive, it can be hard.

Don't be afraid to ask questions, don't be like hubby who was only shopping from Rewe and H&M. As soon as I got to meet people, I started asking where the cheap shops were.. Now, I am the one taking hubby around. Lol..

Have a plan A, B, C. This is Germany and running/hiding illegally is not a child's play. So have a concrete set of plans, talk to people, read online as voraciously as you can. Don't be afraid to try!

Cut your coat according to your size. We live in a village close to the city my husband works, about 10-15 minutes by train, this has reduced the amount we pay for rent by a lot! We got a fully furnished apartment, he literally moved in with just his clothes, it was a very good "soft landing" as there was no pressure to run into debts buying household items or installing a new kitchen.. (typisch Deutschland). There might be juicy offers of instalmental payment on gadgets, services, household items. While there are some that may be needed, there are some you can definitely survive without. So before you take that offer of monthly instalmental payment ask "DO I WANT THIS, OR DO I NEED THIS?"

This should be my first point, but because it is last doesn't mean it is the least. PRAY, PRAY, PRAY! I have enjoyed so many exceptions and protocol breaking and I would attribute all of that to God! Never stop praying!
Thanks for reading.. I know say e long.. Make una no vex''.

Liebe Grüße, German japa lady...

*Nice one......  You sound really sharp and smart and I am happy with the way you hungrily searched for solutions.. I hope this helps someone...

Please mail me the link that your hubby got that Job from so that i can post it inside in house news for others to try out other places....