The News in Nigeria has been recently awash with how some people maltreat/suffer/punish their househelps....It is even more painful cos some employ underaged househelps with the promise to send them to schoo but turn them to mini slaves......Mscheeeew!!
How do you treat that your house help? What about your driver, your security guard? Are you one of those wicked madam/Aunty, uncle? Let's discuss, and check our selves in the process.
I presently do not have a help, in fact I never had one, but last year, I fell seriously ill at the point of death even, and couldn't do anything not even to speak. So I had the option of hiring a help to help me with taking care of my kids, my husband tried but he couldn't meet up with taking care of the kids.
ReplyDeleteSo my friend brought a grown up girl of about 20 years of age to assist me and we agreed on a specified amount. This girl has anger issues 😳, I remember asking her to peel garlic for me and she told me point blank that she can't, I was so shocked, I called her to talk to her about her attitude, I didn't even raise my voice oh, where the strength sef to shout, she just hissed and left my house. Lol, not even up to a week of employment. She later came back to apologize and explained she has anger issues. This is 2. Weeks later lol.
I still forgave her and took her in, I really really tried to make her a part of my family but her stubbornness no gree. She hates going on errands and enjoys watching TV and eating. I had to send her away last month because her own is too much.
I manage my kids myself now, though the stress is much but I'm ok.
So sometimes, some of them are something else. If I really recount what she did to me eh, hmmmm you will all be shocked. I showed her enough love, overlooked her bad attitude but still...
Hmmmm, this people only respond to wickedness and meanness eziokwu.
DeleteJust like you too I didn't want help but doctor said it's a necessary evil, so I got one, this aunty stressed my life eh like you wouldn't believe me, people said I was too lenient with her, like am I supposed to screaming my head off l? When she no be Tata?
I treated her well, when I asked her to come and be going she begged for another chance,
All she want to do is watch television, eat( she ate like a horse) and sleep(her favourite pastime), now I have no problem with her doing this but aunty you kent be relaxing when there are things to be done around the house. I just ignored her and was doing my thing.
My mum said I should teach her I like to get things done but aunty was not interested in learning, my mum finally understood me when she and my kids went over to my parents place for holiday, aunty didn't do Jack, my mum called me and was like ehn? I said ifugo nu ya.
My kids love her and that's why I allowed her stay that long with me, she's a kid at heart, you guys need to see the way she brings herself down to their level, help with their assignment and play with them.
She can gist ehn, she be proper story teller🤣🤣
She still drops by sometimes, give me an earful, play with the kids and be on her merry way
Character dey this life
Gifty
I think both of those individuals had no concept of what working entails. They probably came from backgrounds where neither of their parents worked or if they did, they worked in the informal economy and only worked sporadically, like working a few months of the year centred around fulfilling a specific goal, like Christmas clothes or back to school. They had no work ethic or desire for employment or the mindset of a daily work routine. Even if someone gave them a business it would fail.
DeleteHey simply sometimes to see a good one is hard ,if you can see a good person that comes weekly and goes it's better ,stress is not good she might comes three times a week do all the laundry and house work for you to reduce stress.
DeleteMy blames are to families in the first place who bore number of kids thy can't conveniently cater for. A man with just two or maximum three kids has no business giving out one for a maid.
ReplyDeleteThis is all you get when you have up to five, six to seven children when you're not financially buoyant as a man to feed, clothe or even get them basic education..
Nigerians should understand not every sex should produce an offspring. No be competition something. Give birth to children you can take proper care of without pressure. This is the only remedy to avert situations like this.
Anyone who maltreats a maid or househelp should bear in mind, not all househelp are nice. Some can kill their employer's kids or even the employer.
© TEEJAY
@ Teejay, you are on point and maid service should be legalized, teach them standards of behaviour, basic healthcare like CPR and have standard pay for them. I look up to God to help me with maid when the time comes, i don't maltreat people yet they tend to misbehave.
DeleteThis topic,let me just start by saying,the help is the help.that said,alot of them are wicked not bcos anyone is wicked to them in the house they reside.but bcos it is inbuilt.most of them are thieves .and most of them were molested so they feel it's their turn to do it to anoda .I have seen where they are loved and taken care of only for them to become so wicked to their employers.my friend treated her girl with so much love and respect only for this girl to empty her house and disappear.i feel treat them well but don't over do it.tbey are not your family know when to draw the line.u can't trust them oh!!!! My girl staying with me stole meat from d pot not knowing I knew it was d last meat in d pot.when I asked,she said I should just seat at the table and she will serve my meal.she brought it out of d bin,where she threw it to avoid being caught.she put it on my food,and served me.i saw her when she picked it out of d bin.she even ate half of it sef.this is someone hu serves herself in my house.u can't love them enough bcos they come with a mentality.may God help us all.
ReplyDeleteWhy will she steal meat and throw it away?
DeleteAnon 17:49, I follow you dey ask. Stoke meat and put it in the bin not eat it??? Then picked it out of the bin to put in your food? What sort of fables is this?
DeleteAnon 17:49 and 19:22.pls read and comprehend,other than that,u don't live with me na,so fables how? mtcheeeeew
DeleteI blame people who use their kids to go and serve as slave for another family for God's sake why didn't they give birth to the number of kids they can cater for? If Nigeria were to be a good country, there should not be anything like house maid.
ReplyDeleteThrt will burn like rats and tell you God will provide.
DeleteThe common sense he provided you with, what did you do with it?
Been married almost 30 years. Have trained 5 househelps, 1 Gardner and 1 driver to uni level. And also assisted in training their children as well. What I’ve noticed, if u treat them well, they treat ur family and u well. If we are flying anywhere, the ones coming with us fly. They eat what we eat and when I travel I shop for them as well. They give issues but nothing my own kids will not give me. And I don’t hire under 18 year olds.
ReplyDeleteJust thank God for favouring you in that aspect. Believe me, many people treat their subordinates well and it doesn't end well. Thank you for being a good boss.
DeleteSome were equally treated well but ended up kpaiying their bosses.
DeleteI will continue to tell you this.....your best friends amongst your staff should be your cook, your driver and your gateman. You see these three can make or mal you at any point in time.
ReplyDeleteStop using what you got by grace to disgrace others.
I could remember the woman who came from USA which I'm to drive for just 3months. I drove her only for two weeks and left.
She is fond of calling me names and slapping me while on wheels. I pulled over on our way to abeokuta from Lagos at LAFARGE area and gave her the key. She begged me tire but left her without even asking for my payment.
If I was so wicked and brutal, would have killed her and take away all the foreign currency she was having with her but nop, my name is more precious to me.
How did you know she was having 'all the foreign currency with her.'
DeleteAnd its 'mar', by now you should know that.
We had maids growing up
ReplyDeleteBut I don’t think I can have a live in maid
People compare too much. Fact is they are not your kids you are paying them. You will try to show equal care but people will still say you didn’t try enough
Worst is for life any problem they have they’ll come to you
Too much pls
i caught my 25 year old village trained househelp with my husband midnight, i had a good fight with her and put pepper in her bum, the next day she refused to go and said guy man must settle her.....i had a good laugh, dont even know how dem settle..she was a good househelp but i no sabi say she don begin see herself as my co wife
ReplyDeleteSo you stayed with the man who put his deek in a village girls vjayvjay and was putting it in yours too? How’ wasn’t she your co wife ? And you’re proud saying you fought with her ? Such a 🤡 you’re !
DeleteYou’re the loser here . Taaah
So after putting pepper in her butt, what did you do to your husband?
DeleteGifty
Hope you put the remaining pepper in your horseband's bum?
DeleteAs it is, you are rearing a pig.
A diseased filled one at that.
Instead of lolling sheepishly with your nylon filled with pepper and salt,better go and check your self for diseases top to bottom.
And while you do that, check mentally too.
Because anyone who would spread someone's buttocks to put pepper is a psycho, completely mentally unbalanced.
@15:58
DeleteA good laugh at the man as he deserved for adultery.
Where were guys on 12/5/2024 when most female Bvs used their IDs or went Anon to encourage that day's chronicler into adultery.
Oh, the Chronicler is no a village vjay owner. LoL
Your husband was the one who betrayed you and deserved the beating and pepper in the bum; and yes, he needed to settle her for all the free sex and unfulfilled promises he made to her.
DeleteWouldn’t he have settled a prostitution abi are side chicks for free?
Mad men everywhere 🤮🤮
I'm shocked at how comfortable you are saying you put pepper in another human being's bum!!!
DeleteAre you okay???
You are evil personified sha! I can already imagine how u treated the help prior to you catching her with ur husband. You are evil!
DeleteMadam you are married to a wild animal who doesn't like you and doesn'tcare that he puts you and the children at risk to be poisoned and killed by the househelp , putting pepper in another human is animal behaviour
DeleteMy help will be writing WAEC next year. I pray to God to bless me financially so that I can see her through University. She is a God sent, very hard working, neat, prayerful, intelligent and obedient. She is my first help and will be last help.
ReplyDeleteYou're lucky
DeleteI really pray to be blessed with a good help.
DeleteWhen I was working,I had different live in maids,to help with the kids and one mama to come and go. Since,I stopped working 10 years ago,mama is still there,It's 18 years now. She has been a good support system for us. We told her to retire but she insisted,until our last kid,is leaving secondary school. No issues,some of her kids are jealous of me,that mama cares about us more than them. It has been wonderful experience.
ReplyDeleteAwww
DeleteNice.
DeleteI don’t have househelp but if I did I wouldn’t become friendly with them to the point of treating them like family. They are staff and I hate blurred lines, so while they would have jobs perks and well paid with clear days off, I have no intention of making them like family. I think in instances where someone has been in service to a family for 25 years or more it is possible for them to be like family because they have earned it through loyalty, but I couldn’t extend that to someone just working for 3 years, they staff.
ReplyDeleteThis
DeleteI don't have a help but if I later employ one
ReplyDeleteI ll treat her like a family member but I ll maintain some kind of boundary
I had a nanny, she was with me from when I was pregnant for my 2nd child till the day we migrated abroad as PRs, she is very much older than me but I was respectful and she was respectful too, increased her salary twice in the space of 2 years without her asking, gave her bonuses as I got them at the office and paid her 2 months arrears when we migrated. We still speak during birthdays as she calls and I call too to wish her happy birthday. I am grateful I had such a help cos I did not need to tell her what to do as I explained my fears to her before employing her.
ReplyDelete